r/Tinder | "I'M YOUR MOM..."

freak me if I'm wrong but are you holding a cat in your fifth picture yep it was a dog hello ladies and gentlemen welcome to MK the finest read of readings south of the Equator and in today's video we're going to be looking at top posts from our slash tinder where the formula is I look at a post that contains human interaction and say that I wish it was me that's basic let's go now first up we've got Kate 26 46 miles away just on here to let my boyfriend Zack 29 know that I know that he's using this even though we bought a house eight months ago okay well I don't wish that was me I can confidently say that next up we've got Ricky University don't buy Colgate whitening toothpaste it says guaranteed whiteness in 14 days it's been two weeks and I'm still Asian I'm so sorry - you should consider suing so I went to see my doctor and he told me I'm deficient in vitamin you slow claps do you want to vitamin-c me so I can give you the vitamin D I'm not sure if I want to vitamin B with you yeah okay I heard whoa looks like I'm on a lucky break here because I don't wish that was me either rip no way I'm Russian - I could tell Russian - get your clothes off never stolen - put in we should roleplay Donald Trump in the Russians but instead of playing with the elections you can play with my erections oh yeah good thinking I actually have to be able to hold the conversation same I'm testing you usually the results is positive good they usually start with I have some bad news so I'm not sure if it's good huh Oh was that in our / whoosh please don't post me for seven karma Karen took the kids and my dignity is all I have left and then they posted it anyway absolutely brutal so what makes you swipe her self destructive need to ruin every conversation I have with the woman oh okay hey you should play me a song better what song do you want to hear I know a lot of Led Zeppelin but if you give me a song I can learn it for you all right dope the sound of silence by Simon and Garfunkel I can do that too Garfunkel what if what an Garfunkel that's a strange name and who really says we made that song you know how good are you at Scrabble I get excited when I get ZZZ and Q's I've always thought the scoring fell to it off TBH interesting elaborate I mean if you want there's probably more interesting things to talk about anyway well the way I see it Nina by the way that's your name just by the way setting up there's no way the correct value of Nina is for I'd say it's at least a solid ten oh my god oh my god I can spell both arenal white one renals is that a word what does renal mean come to I help Google relating to the kidneys okay I can spell both renal and learn be rearranged well you can't spell the word by how about that one be rearranging the letters in your name but only after I take you out hmm that's that's some intelligent crap my name man could use a D if you want to give it there are a lot of dijo que in this one I've just if I gave you a day I could make a launder or Dan Allah Dan refers to a lazy individual something I am not in the bedroom were dan sounds like laundry which is clean which is also something I'm not in the bedroom alright you've got three options here hey my dad joke be a dirty joke seemed RPG adventure a NC whoa all right here we go generating generating world how you wake up in a tunnel with no memory of how you got there or who you are at one end you see a faint light next to you as a pack on the other end is just pitch black Hey go towards the light be open the pack C go into the dark beam the open the pack you crawl over to the pack and unfasten it opening it you find a length of rope a rusty flashlight and a torn picture there's a female on the whole side is that you the other side seems like it had another person but you can't find the missing piece in the bag and now do you main go down the light side of the tunnel or B go down the dark side of the tunnel I'll pick aim the light side you slowly make your way towards the light you feel like getting warmer as you do the Tom begins to widen until you reach the exit and you find yourself standing on a Ledge in the cavern to either side you see stalagmites and in front of you a cliff you see two Falls one made of water and the other lava and now do you may look down below the cliff be look around the ledge or C go back I'll pick aim look down below the cliff you move to the edge below you is a pool with water on one side and lava on the other in the center where they made there seems to be a part where the water cools the lava it looks to be about 20 feet below you do you a check Road plank a be look around ledge or C go back beam look round ledge you search around the ledge and find a pathway behind the stalagmites that leads behind the lava form do you a check rope planks B go behind lava fall or C go back beam go behind lava fall haha this is fun you climb through the rocks and walk down the path the closer you get to the lava the hotter it becomes once behind the fall you feel the blistering heat and see a large dark door against the cliff face you also see a dark object just within the lava fall do you Aang inspect the door B inspect the lava form or C go back I'm glad you're liking it I'll pick beam inspect the lava for you get closer to the foam shielding yourself from the heat it seems like if you had something to cup your hand you could grab whatever the object is and pull it out do you a wrap the rope around your hand and try to grab it be inspect the door or C go back I'll pick a try to grab it wrapping the Rope tightly around your hand and plunging it into the lava you feel extreme heat and then something solid you quickly grab hold and yank it out the rope burst into flames as you rip it off the object now in your hand is surprisingly cool to the touch it looks like a small grill hey open it be inspect the door will see go back I'll pick a opener you open it and feel the blast of heat come from inside you find a crooked piece of steak and notice an inscription on the inside of the lid it says I love a good barbecue haha oh my god if you want to subscribe to josé's rpgs and go in a day with him please and put your phone number he better of got it like after all that writing he'd better have got it um good good luck Jose you are my man that was solid are you going out to see the river tomorrow want to drill my kuchi what what who we've got a cheating husband 26 liya hi my name is Diego and I'm at husband / first time dad who's looking for a Santa my wife found out I had tinder while she was 37 weeks pregnant and I cried because I felt embarrassed but Here I am again my baby is full months old and I'm on tinder again and my wife doesn't know haha I just can't help but look at other women well so if you see me out in public slap me or punch me for being a dumbass and ruining my marriage and little family or because I wanted another females coochie that was horrible oh my god here we've got Jen 32 I just want to find someone more disappointing than me some a mum won't question her parenting abilities for a brief moment fair enough yeah look looking out for those most important to you I respect it okay who've got oh yeah a classic gift of our friendly neighborhood spider-man ha ha ha spider-man is so thick huh you know they used to call me spider-man in high school because you're thick no because my uncle got murdered oh my goodness please tell me that's not real hey we met on tinder before well well yes I remember have you been Mike anything new nothing news since you stopped talking to me after I suggested hanging out lamell that that's the saddest XD I've ever seen that is a thin rebound sad emoji right there hey tell me a joke you're like without me what am i company over dude you could come over tonight if you really wanted to okay we're back at it okay I wish that was me today we're back to who we're back where we started okay here we're saying to page I recently published a book it's been described as a real page-turner well my last name is Turner - oh my god nice you've got summer 18 a professional dumbass may resume my second favorite daughter my mom must have put extra dumb birch sauce in a the Lord I wish I had it son dad five out of ten me there we have it folks the most relatable tinder profile in history you like horses I do ha ha I've been compared to them before Oh hard-working graceful and strong ha ha oh that's good yeah and also I have a huge dong there it is who you've got living 18 graduated from hell I'm the kind of person you can't take home to meet your mum she'll think I'm super funny and charming and cubed but actually kind of sexy at the same time she pulls in love with me I think I feel the same way we get married I'm your dad now I confront you why you on tinder you are now grounded yikes freak you're fine as poo girl hi be my goth gf my pleasure is that something you can handle cuz you say that now but what about when I have you tied up to a chair and I'm ripping your heart out mmm I'll crap what you mean like murder me cuz I Prix with that crap heavy yeah basically and drain you of your blood and pour it over your body so you'll definitely be dead by the end of it sorry I'm gonna have to murder that coochie first hey have you heard about the latest Spotify glitch if this is another hottest single joke what's that for some reason they didn't have you listed at this week's hottest single brilliant I have a haven't heard it before can you believe that did you check under recently played brilliant do you know what a balloon has them my life doesn't what well Aaron it has air in it oh my god no it's actually really clever well now it does what do you like to do in your free time I'm playing basketball video games at reading and probably my most regular hobbies what about you I like to hang out with friends my dog go read and relax Oh what kind of dog what was I meant to be from your alternate account or like well I'm confused as it's meant to him is this because these are the same person I'm confused right so it's either they're responding to the wrong person and it's and it's just weird no not has to be because it's like to have the same encounter right if send nudes home out tender just ask me if he sent any inappropriate messages and why your tinder knows yeah what's this send nudes it didn't work damn maybe you knows you're the creepy one Brad Brad Brad I'm looking for the harm to my Leia the bend to my sette I don't know what that's problem and I'm not gonna try to say it right it has to be a Star Wars thing but I don't remember that name being in Star Wars you know my Anakin took my Padme maybe not the last one because I don't want you to choke me wait maybe I do ba ba ba ba ba ba ba 9 that's my number if you ever want a text why what the Frick that's my number that's impossible call that number right now text it I'm texting myself yeah try calling me real quick it won't let me call it it makes me put in my voicemail password I just convinced a tinder boy that we had the exact same number so I didn't have to text him are you absolutely sure you want bad pickup lines I want your worst ok you asked for it you want to sit on my face and let me eat my way to your heart didn't I call you out for inappropriate language on my end it asked me if your messages made me uncomfortable for now I didn't report you though you're welcome ha ha that's kind of cool actually for real I've I've never seen that happen before long want to play Barbies copy ken and you be the box I come in oh wow that one is even worse oh man Rex get back here dude is sorry he just runs off sometimes so anyway how's your morning been I'm a cat person oh man Stella get back here who's sorry she runs off sometimes a fun fact Stella is actually my old dog's name and it looks just like the dog in this picture so isn't that a cool coincidence anyway I hope you enjoyed this video if you did be sure to LIKE subscribe all that and if there's anything else you want to see be sure to comment below I'm always on the lookout for new subreddits and if you like this video be sure to go subscribe to my main channel the links in the description and if you like this then you'll probably like that too so anyway I hope you've enjoyed this video and as always I'll see you in the next one boy [Music]

Channel: EmKay

Views: 1,820,158

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, r/tinder, tinder, r/tinder top posts, r/tinder emkay, r/entitledparents, r/choosingbeggars, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, sorrow tv, rslash, giofilms, fresh, funny, emkay

Id: 1XIdj8wM2yM

Length: 12min 38sec (758 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 25 2019