r/Relationships - ABANDONED After Confrontation Sends Me To The Hospital...

g'day there guys love guru maki here back at it again with another episode of guess what r relationship advice now if you have anything to say about these people's relationships please do tell me down in the comments sit back relax and enjoy today's bloody good content posted by user thro r a tuka titled my 29 male wife 27 female has been working from home the past few months and has started having her high school ex over a lot i told her this is unacceptable am i in the wrong for this hey everyone i know that the title may sound confusing without the background that i am about to give so ever since covert started my wife has been working from home my job never let us do that so i have still been driving to work every day she has a friend that she occasionally hangs out with he's been invited to hang out with both of us before too he's nice fun to hang around and pretty cool i've had no problem with this my wife made me aware pretty early on that she dated him in high school and she said that they dated their freshman in sophomore year they never had sex but did mess around they started reconnecting his friends during their senior year at that time he had a girlfriend and she was starting to see another guy as well she claims that after they broke up there was never anything romantic between them when covert started my wife said that she would be able to work from home i was glad and happy for her as i knew it would be easier and even save gas she said that her friend was going to be able to work from home too so they may meet up sometimes to go over their work and help each other they both work in a similar field one day i came home and noticed that he was there i thought nothing of it really as my wife had told me about this they both had their computers and looked like they were working pretty hard for a while it was like this suddenly a few weeks in i would come home and they would be casually hanging out and having fun sometimes they would be playing a game sometimes they would be drinking sometimes they would be eating i started finding this a little bit weird it seemed as though he was getting much more attention than me and that she was having a better time with him than me then one day when i came home it was the final straw they were both on the couch and her head was in his lap while they were watching tv i waited until after he left and then had a talk with her i was fuming i yelled at her and told her that their actions have been unacceptable and that there's no reason that she should be laying with a friend like that i expressed how i felt like she's been showing him more attention than her husband and that it seemed like they were having more fun together than we do not to mention that they had dated before and fooled around she got really upset and said that i had no right to tell her that she can no longer hang around someone she was mad that i seemed to claim that she was cheating on me with him and swore that she was not and would not do that she said that all they were doing was relaxing and that it was not wrong to lay her head on his lap the last two days he has not been at the house when i got home she says that she's not seen him since our talk i apologize for being so angry about it and she doesn't seem like she's really accepted my apology as she's been really quiet around me ever since how do i make things better is she cheating how do i handle things between her and this friend i agree with you when you said that they had computers out and were working hard i felt it seemed innocent enough however a woman putting her head in some guy's lap no no no boundaries are being crossed it is not appropriate and she knows it would she be okay if the situation was reversed thank you i don't like how everyone is automatically saying that it's wrong that the guy is over there in the first place sure it's weird that they dated but that was very many years ago i had no problem when they were working but what they did was taking it too far you were wrong she would never be okay with your ex coming over to work in your house also social distancing means no one comes over you are being blind sounds like you're making assumptions about the nature of their relationship rp says they work in the same field why is it weird if he's there to collaborate about work with kovid you shouldn't be collaborating in person there is no reason they couldn't call each other or do a video conference exactly that kind of defeats the purpose of social distancing and working from home someone else reckons set up a hidden ssid and at least one wireless camera and tape over slash disable the camera lights you are not going to like what you find i would probably go with this option better safe than sorry yeah spying on your spouse seems like a great option that a rational person who isn't a creepy control freak would do sarcasm can only hope the both of you grow out of this opinion yeah the head on lap thing is inappropriate but jesus christ this is morally bankrupt you do not record people in their own home without their consent your spouse is not your property don't get married if that's what you think marriage is about you're a dumb ass if you think you shouldn't act on your instincts and get proof of your wife cheating otherwise in your divorce you will be paying your alimony and retirement and everything you own because you didn't want to break trust when she broke the trust first do not listen to this guy someone else says you are not at all in the wrong here at first it seemed innocent enough but putting your head into the lap of someone you're not with is suspicious af she's right that you have no right to tell her to do something but since you explained and asked her to stop and she's being defensive like this i'm getting a ton of red flags if she's not cheating she's sure not showing respect for you as her partner it wouldn't surprise me if she is cheating though with how overly close they seem to be getting update my wife has been working from home the past few months and has started having her high school ex over a lot i told her this is unacceptable so last week i posted here about my wife spending time at our house with an old ex that she used to have from high school he's been coming over and working from home with her ever since covert started at first i thought nothing of it as they were just simply helping each other with their work then they started hanging out and stuff more when i caught her laying down with her head on his lap i had enough i told her he could no longer come over she was mad and took offense to this but agreed most people here agreed with me that it was sketchy for her to do this i was made aware that he could still be coming over during the day and leaving before i get there i ended up buying a camera that i could set up and hide while i'm at work i put one in the living room and one in the bedroom the first day that was set up i saw nothing unusual the second day was when it happened the ex came over at first they were just working but then he started to get pretty touchy with her it progressed until they ended up going to our bedroom and sleeping together i was shocked i wasn't sure what to do as soon as i saw my wife again i questioned her if she had been seeing him anymore she denied it i told her that i had cameras installed in the house her face changed completely then she knew what i had seen she immediately started crying i told her to leave the house she tried to apologize and explain but i wasn't having any of it since then we've talked to each other once i told her that i don't see how anything can happen besides a divorce she said she doesn't want that and asked if i could go to couples counseling one time before making that final decision i reluctantly agreed i don't expect it to work and i'm mainly doing it to humor her i'm still looking and trying to contact divorce attorneys as i'm typing this i'm really sorry this happened to you i wish people could be honest and truthful the first time they're asked before evidence is released thank you me too it seems like lying and delaying the truth just makes it harder on both people therapists offices are a great place to break up built-in support they see it all the time i would recommend to skip the couple's counseling and just start your own individual therapy even if it hasn't fully hit you yet this type of behavior is going to affect every relationship you have moving forward it will help a lot to have someone to talk about all these things both are really helpful coming from someone this happened to the couple's therapy was incredibly validating even though i went into it knowing i would only take divorce as an option this it sounds weird but the goal of couples therapy isn't always to fix the relationship sometimes it's just to find closure figure out where things went wrong and how those things can be avoided in future relationships and how to interact with each other civilly despite intense feelings this is especially useful when there are kids involved i wouldn't say it's necessary but also not to write it off immediately someone else says don't let her fool you everything she's doing since being found out is an attempt to sweep this under the rug as fast as possible her desire to earn your trust back is simply a means to an end to her getting what she wants just like her cheating on you was about her getting what she wants with complete disregard for you if she really cared about how this affected you she'd be giving you space but she can't risk that because you might use it to realize this relationship is done she doesn't want that even if parting ways would be the healthiest option for you both she just wants what she wants and she'll do anything she can to get it it's not remorse it's fear what she's doing is flooding you with promises and apologies and emotional appeals in hopes that something will stick especially these blanket offers of i'll do anything you need me to as if it's your job to fix this as if there must be some solution and you're the unreasonable one if you can't come up with it opie please read these sentences your reluctant acceptance of couples therapy suggests that just as she's successfully played you when she lied about having an affair she is just trying to play you again i agree with this comment if you go to therapy with her her plan is to go davo on you and by the end of the session you will be apologizing to her for her cheating on you if she has her way fortunately it sounds like you were pretty solid but crazier things have happened on reddit posts please update all of us if you're up for it after the session she's not sorry she did it only that she got caught her version of therapy is going to be gaslighting him into believing he drove her to do this and it was somehow his fault op's priority should be to immediately freeze any account she has access to and he should not say a word to her until after he consults with an attorney someone else says first of all get tested for stds her friend might not be exclusive with your wife secondly so sorry about the demise of your marriage because even if you go to counselling and decide not to divorce her the marriage is over it was over the first time she broke her vow to you to forsake all others now you know she's an unfaithful deceitful liar that can look right into your face and demand apologies from you for having perfectly normal suspicions how could you ever trust her again keep looking for that lawyer not sure if first of all get tested for stds was intended to be interpreted literally so for good measure hiv cannot reliably be detected until three months after infection from mopey's post it sounds as though this guy's been hanging around in the background for some time there's no telling how long she's actually been cheating with him op has just very recently become aware of the infidelity but it could have been going on for a while oh posted by user throw r a rocker co titled my male 21 girlfriend female23 obsession with pokemon is embarrassing me so my girlfriend loves pokemon sometimes when we go out she will ask me if it's all right if she checks for some pokestops on pokemon go when someone we know talks about pokemon my girlfriend gets really excited and wants to be friends on pokemon go right away she also has many pokemon plushies all of them in our shared bedroom at first it was cute but my friends are starting to make fun of me for dating a child my girlfriend is very mature and an amazing partner but when i brought up how her obsession with pokemon is embarrassing for her age she felt insulted and told me her liking and playing pokemon is no different than me playing league of legends and minecraft still my buddies are making fun of us and i'm afraid she'll get hurt once she hears them what do i do how do i convince her she should maybe turn it down a little my friends are visiting us and i'm sure they will make fun of her once they see all of her plushies get some new friends there are mutual friends so she would need to know they make fun of her i don't want her to know really because i know she will get hurt they sound like crap friends for mocking her behind her back and you sound like a pretty poor boyfriend for not sticking up for your girlfriend or respecting her interests fyi my girlfriend is 31 and she's a pokemon nut thank you those are crap friends wtf i'm personally insulted by this me and my husband met playing pokemon go we still play every single day none of our friends would dare to insult our interest simply because we all understand what respect of individuality is you need to grow some balls and tell them to shut the hell up and stop taking the piss out of your girlfriend and her harmless hobby and if they continue you need to get better friends for the record my wife and i both love pokemon and we're in our 30s hubby and i are 48 and 46 and we're playing what else is there to do when your city and country is still on lockdown lie down try not to cry cry a lot oh my god this is so sad you should embrace her love for pokemon since it brings her happiness if your friends make fun of her tell them they can leave a lot of people enjoy things other people find childish but they shouldn't have to change what they enjoy so other people think they are grown up let your girlfriend enjoy what she enjoys as much as she wants to enjoy it if your friends don't like it well screw them i would love to just tell them to freak off but there are mutual friends so my girlfriend will eventually find out they're making fun of her not as hard as she's going to be when she finds out her boyfriend was letting them talk crap about something she loves behind her back it's time to sack up and be a man never let anyone friend or not make fun of your girlfriend behind her back not even be a man just be a decent human update my girlfriend's obsession with pokemon is embarrassing me i've decided to post this update because you were all right i didn't have a girlfriend problem i had a friend's problem so i had to talk with my girlfriend like one of the users have suggested i explained to her that i'm not ashamed of her hobby i just didn't want her to know what our friends were saying behind her back she said she doesn't care about their opinion she's just doing what she's enjoying the most i apologize to her she has also agreed to move her pokemon plushies so they wouldn't take up so much space fast forward to today a few hours ago our friends have visited us it didn't take long for them to start making fun of my girlfriends this time i got mad she organized her plushies so that they were all in our bedroom she has not even once mentioned pokemons nor did she open the pokemon go app long story short they were forced to leave i've realized they don't have a problem with my girlfriend's hobby they have a problem with my girlfriend and i have enabled their behavior by not reacting sooner i told them they're the ones who need to grow up and to visit us again once they stop being boomers to show my girlfriend how sorry i am and to better understand her hobby i've downloaded the app myself so now i'm trying to level up as much as i can because she has a mission when she needs to trade a pokemon with a friend but to do so i need to be at least level 10. thank you for all your comments even the mean ones they worked as a wake-up call i guess i'll be damned an individual who was able to recognize their shortcomings and bounce back accordingly you sir are a gentleman in the making yup ropi is a great guy and more of us men should strive to be similar put your ego aside to recognize the mistakes you've made apologize and make amends compromise with your partner this is one of the rare cases where the friends were actually a-holes usually i see the friends trying to warn someone about red flags and whatnot very well handled bro your decision to play pokemon with your girlfriend is the best you could make and you're gonna have lots of fun together i started playing minecraft with my boyfriend when we started liking each other and it's even now after three years a good bonding activity and a common hobby i'm actually playing minecraft and my girlfriend decided to play the games i usually play too it really was the best decision i feel like we're actually getting closer honestly this whole post is so freaking adorable i hope to find a girlfriend who makes me feel just as you do right now one day you're an awesome person in my opinion the true self is not based upon just the actions and how you deal with your day to day but when hardship happens what path you choose to take and how you take it take great pride in your ability to look at yourself and accepting what you were doing wrong and finding a path to better yourself and your relationship it's more rare than you think also never lose that ability we will forever need to discover things within ourselves that we could do better in a moment of difficulty yes and also his girlfriend didn't freak out or go overboard when he told her she decided she wanted him to be more comfortable and moved her plushies and that speaks volumes on her character yes this part too both sides handled the situation perfect instead of one side or the other making a huge change and things worked out great funny how things work all right guys that's where i'm gonna end today's video i really do hope you enjoyed it and maybe even learned something that you didn't know before if you haven't already please do feel free to click that like button as it really does help me in the youtube algorithm and if you haven't already and you love today's video please feel free to subscribe i would love it a lot also big big big shout out to all my patreon members and channel subscribers you guys are all up in the screen right now i love you i love your faces also i love seeing you guys all chatting down below in the comments it brightens my day to see the stories that you guys share and just the kind words you guys always have for my videos as well as everyone else in the videos i love you too but honestly your ongoing support means the world to me and i just love it so much that you guys are able to support a career for myself that i invest so much time into and you guys honestly motivate me to work harder each and every day to put more love into the videos for you guys if you guys have watched this far in the video and you haven't already subscribed on patreon or become a channel member that's cool you don't have to but there are links down below uh you can donate any amount of money pledge that any month cancel whenever i'm completely cool with it it's just there for you to support me if you'd like to go the extra mile and i'll go the extra mile for you guys by putting out new amazing content every single day with that said guys i really hope you have a good day night sleep bath time at work whatever you're up to today this has been marky i'll see you in the next amazing video bye

Channel: Markee

Views: 18,811

Rating: 4.9231548 out of 5

Keywords: r/relationshipadvice, relationship, advice, relationshipadvice, r/relationship, reddit, Markee, Markee relationship, r/justnoMIL, r/amitheasshole

Id: j4aJDCW4GwM

Length: 20min 55sec (1255 seconds)

Published: Sat Aug 01 2020