r/AmiTheA**Hole For Punishing An Unforgiveable Mistake?

good day there guys younger but quite uglier version of steve owen here back at it again with another episode of r slash am i the a-hole now if you love this now if you love this video i want you to sit back relax chuck a prawn on the barbie and enjoy this bloody good content crikey posted by user furious cine titled am i the a-hole for cutting out my wife's friend after she told my kids how my wife died my first wife had a group of best friends she was super close to they were like sisters one will call faith is the godmother to our oldest child sadly my first wife died due to complications with childbirth with our second child the group of friends faith included were there for me this was five years ago three years later i met my current wife and we married this year through a lot of conversations we finally decided it was time to answer my kids questions about how their mum died in the past i told them that she got sick and passed away which is technically true but i never went into details they're five and seven i didn't want my son blaming my daughter i didn't want my daughter to have any guilt so i finally decided to get them a therapist to talk about it but with a pandemic we have to wait a month the issue came up with faith she watches my kids i told her my plan and she told me that i should tell them not a therapist i said i'd rather have a professional's help faith was really against it but i didn't think much of it until i came home from work and found out she had told my kids a child-friendly version mommy got sick when having daughter but a virgin nonetheless i was ticked i've banned her from the house and seeing the kids while trying to help my kids emotionally process this my wife is looking at nannies the rest of the friend group says that i overreacted that faith was just trying to help i say it wasn't her place i told them if they keep it up i'll cut all of them off i'm so furious my wife has told me that i'm starting to go too far am i being an ass absolutely not that is vile it is not her place to be telling the kids what happens to their mother at such a young age that's something you save for much later when the kids are ready for it she took it upon herself to break the news to them what why why would you do that what do you have to gain from telling the kids that like it's honestly sick what kind of sick person thinks that that's okay to do opie you're not the a-hole i want you to go harder than that it's disgusting that they did that not the a-hole it was not her place to tell your children that faith might have had good intentions but that under no circumstances gives her the right to talk to someone else's children about how one of their biological parents passed away shake my damn head the road to hell is paved with good intentions good intentions only matter if the results weren't harmful definitely not the a-hole he straight-up told her he wanted the professional's help yet she went behind his back and did it herself anyway not the a-hole exactly this she not only overstepped in a massive way and put the kids a potential risk of emotional harm she has clearly demonstrated she doesn't respect your ability to parent even after you told her your plan and gave her a reason when she questioned you which is already more than should have been required she decided you were wrong and didn't know how to raise your kids as well as she did that's something that isn't going to go away she will continue to question you and overstep you it doesn't matter if she thought what she was doing was right she severely overstepped after you specifically told her how you wanted to handle it she should never have been the one to tell them and it was a complete breach of trust further she owes him an apology even if faith was a sister she had zero place in telling the kids jesus not the a-hole this is a sensitive topic that absolutely does need professional assistance because things like this will get stuck in the back of a child's mind and could lead to more emotional and mental hurt in the future faith had no place to say that she had no place to put your children's well-being at risk what the hell that's such a crappy thing to do and it will definitely be stuck in the children's minds my late husband passed away when my little boy was one and a half he's six now and honestly my husband's death was so complicated all i've told him is he got too sick and they couldn't make him better obviously it's not going to be enough but he brings it up at the weirdest times and i would be livid if anyone tries to explain his death in more detail particularly if i've already asked them not to the mere fact it was childbirth would definitely cause some resentment between children and be positively crushing to the second child there is no excuse for telling like this particularly if they were planning on going to see a therapist waiting until covert is better under control could make for some awkward conversations if the kids have been asking more about it but i really don't think waiting would have caused more harm than having a family friends tell them really makes me wonder if the woman wasn't feeling a bit bitter about the mother's death and already blaming the child and felt the kid needed to feel some guilt about her mother's death too honestly i wouldn't put that past some people i really wouldn't posted by user billy blandass titles am i the a-hole for not providing my guests preferred hygiene products earlier this week i had a small party at my apartment we're all sitting in the living room drinking beer and having a chill time when one of my friends let's call him mark oh hi mark for namesake gets up to use the restroom after about 20 minutes we noticed that mark has been in the bathroom for a while now we knock on the door to ask him if he's alright and he doesn't reply about five minutes later we see him sort of waddle out of the bathroom with her i've still got doodoo on my butthole walk and he exits the apartment without another word the first thing i thought is that maybe he had some sort of uncontrolled butt explosion that he's embarrassed about and couldn't clean so i checked the bathroom and everything is fine it stinks a bit but it's clean i text mark to ask him why he left and he didn't get back to me until today he's now blaming me for not providing toilet paper to wipe his ass and how now he has an itchy rash on his butthole because he had to go all the way home to wipe his ass i told him in no uncertain turns to freak off because there was plenty of toilet paper in the bathroom but he said he couldn't use it now keep in mind that none of us talk about politics and i don't know what their political views are nor do i care as far as i'm concerned my friendships are apolitical and i want them to stay that way that being said i was gifted a whole box of toilet paper with trump's face printed on it during the great toilet paper shortage of 2020 and i'm out of my usual stuff so i'm making use of that until i get a chance to pick up more paper at the grocery markets when mark said that he couldn't use the toilet paper i had he told me the reason was that he didn't want to disrespect the presidents i told him to lighten up and that it's just a gag product that doesn't mean anything to me he hasn't spoken to me since am i the a-hole edits too many people are recommending that socks towels and underwear should be used to wipe ass leaving crap smeared clothing in your friend's bin is not acceptable don't even think about it um oh my god okay i don't think that you're the a-hole for having that you know toilet paper in there and you've said you want to keep it apolitical i know some people love to be political and you know this is the kind of stuff that happens as a result it's um it's toilet paper though you surely can just use some toilet paper if you need to wipe that's kind of really weird buddy but i i hope he's feeling better and um sorry that he got a rash but i don't think that opie is the a-hole here they did provide you toilet paper not the a-hole your guests should never be welcomed again what the hell who walks around with a dirty ass because they don't like the toilet paper what a douche not the a-hole it's a gag product that is actually useful you had toilet paper available it was his choice not to use it regardless of how anyone feels about the president's toilet paper is toilet paper if it's all that's there just use it gag toilet paper is usually pretty horrible and not really meant to be used but it's still better than walking around with crap on your ass posted by user happy things in small titled am i the a-hole for not supporting my sister's gpa celebration so my 18 female younger sister 15 female ended her freshman year with a 4.0 gpa both weighted and unweighted i was really happy for her when i heard the news and bought her a congratulatory card and her favorite chocolates when i heard i know how hard it can be to earn straight a's in high school and appreciated that it was no small feat i just recently graduated from high school myself with a 4.75 gpa a 4.0 unweighted gpa for the past few years i have earned straight a's as well at the end of each term when i told my parents the news they would congratulate me with a high five and would occasionally make my favorite dessert same thing when i graduated with perfect grades they were congratulatory but never made a big deal about it i was grateful for their support and never expected anything more after my sister ended freshman year with straight a's however it was a whole different story she got to choose where we ate for a week my parents bought her a nintendo switch and my dad even crafted a homemade plaque for her out of wood throughout the whole experience i was happy for her but i felt somewhat dejected knowing that her accomplishment was so much more valuable than mine especially since i graduated with perfect grades after taking several advanced classes while she has only completed one year arguably the easiest after taking all regular classes i ended up having a conversation with my parents about it the catalyst was then deciding to lease her car that she wouldn't even be able to use for six months when i had to pay mine off in full i expressed my concerns doing so privately because i didn't want her to think that i was downplaying her achievement they said they understood where i was coming from but they had always known that i was smarter and set for good grades well they never expected that from her my mom even admitted that she was prouder of my sister than she was of me because me getting straight a's was her expectation i decided to move out a week ago this isn't the only instance in which my parents have blatantly favored my sister over me it's been building for a long time and i decided that i didn't want to live in an environment that didn't support me my family have all reached out to me saying that i was a jerk and disrespectful of my sister i don't know what to do am i the a-hole how is you moving out to get away from your disrespectful parents and neglectful parents an a-hole move maybe the parents can be like oh you put up a hissy fit when we had higher standards for you what did you expect dude you're smart she's not smart i just can't come up with a logical way that they would think they're an a-hole because it's obviously not in this situation and i don't know what else to say how is moving out being disrespectful towards your sister did you make a huge poster that says i'm moving out because you are the favorite child did you tell her that your parents are making a big deal out of her gpa because they thought she wasn't smart enough you are definitely not the a-hole here your sister isn't the a-hole though i feel bad for when she hits the real world but your parents complete and data a-holes for fudging up your self-esteem and fudging up your sister's opinion of herself yeah this is how you end up with a poorly adjusted and dependent child opie make sure you keep a relationship with your sister but honestly screw your parents that depends my brother literally only had to read his course materials once and show up for the exam in order to get high grades my sister needed to study her ass off to get a c so if she got a b minus everyone was proud of her and said well done the achievement of a b-minus for her was a lot higher than for my brother the eop is not the a-hole because her parents really effed up however you make a valid points a grades came easy to my oldest daughter my middle daughter was intellectually disabled and worked really hard for b's and c's i was still proud of both of them good grades may have been easier for my oldest but she worked hard in other areas of her life one thing i never did was reward high grades i was more concerned with what they were learning and their attitude rp's parents are showing blatant favoritism with their rewards it's okay to celebrate achievements you know that came with hard work but in op's case it was so blatant that she felt like the achievements don't actually matter moreover since for her perfect grade to the base expectation there is pretty much nothing that she can do to earn a similar level of recognition and or privileges or at the very least she would have to go to pretty extreme lengths in order to achieve that that's an awful feeling no matter what she does her work and achievements will always be taken for granted posted by user writer number 5247 titled am i the a-hole for asking my husband to check on me while playing video games my husband is an avid computer gamer mostly world of warcraft type games and approximately five nights of the week he'll play games online from the time that our son goes to bed at 8 00 or 8 30 to about 12 30 so at least four continuous hours that in itself is not at all an issue for our relationship he spends plenty of time with me and our son and i have my own hobbies that he isn't interested in that i engage in when he's online a few nights ago i was doing laundry while he was playing online and i stepped in a toy that my son had left on the basement stairs i fell pretty hard and dropped the baskets but luckily because of the way my weight was shifted i fell backwards rather than forwards resulting in a bruise on my butt but i was otherwise fine the laundry basket collided down the stairs ricocheted off some basement furniture shot laundry everywhere it was a huge racket it woke up my son my husband who had his head friends on heard literally nothing it dawned on me that if something really bad happened to me my husband wouldn't know about it for potentially four hours like what if i broke my leg falling down the stairs so i asked if he would be willing for my peace of mind to just pop out of his office at the midpoint of each night just to check in on me like literally just say hi and go back to gaming he thinks this is a huge overreaction and a waste of time i know for a fact that he isn't actively gaming the entire time and sometimes takes breaks to go to the bathroom or to get a snack or whatever so how is this difference am i the a-hole i'm gonna put my opinion out there whenever i'm at home doing anything unless i'm by myself i always have one ear out of my headset just in case someone needs me like i don't want to be walked in on in my room and i just you know feel safer like no one's gonna scare me i'm not gonna get a jump scare i would say that's a habit that the husband can take on just have one ear with a headset in one here with a headset out and that would make the checking in mainly unnecessary but still something that would be a nice gesture i can see where she's coming from and i understand her so i don't think you're an a-hole i think he's an a-hole for thinking it's an overreaction not the a-hole my significant other is a gamer similar to yours and in between games he has always came to check on me kiss me etc he's always done this from when we were dating to now living together i think it's really important not only to check up on you but to let you know he's thinking of you i'd say not the a-hole just because he thinks she's overreacting and from what i understood he won't do it fine if he thinks it's silly but when you're in a relationship you sometimes have to do silly harmless things for the comfort of your partner since we had kids we're not allowed noise cancelling headphones in the house anymore it used to just be when i was showering as i have a weak left hip from an accident and can lose my balance sometimes but now with the kids we don't use them because if one of us is in the bathroom or changing the laundry out and the other is in gamerland we wouldn't have good response rates to a toddler or a parent emergency admittedly this was very reactive to me slipping on a magnet block with my bad leg while holding my oldest and i couldn't get up for a bit and it took about 10 minutes before husbands got up for water or something for us to be helped scared us both enough that we put them in the closet for now and wouldn't that be the reaction you'd expect the op's partner to be having right now not the a-hole i think that's a fair compromise for him playing wow five nights a week for four hours they can even compromise further like every hour he texts and instant messages her and only if she doesn't respond does he come check on her he can probably automate it like send the text if no response in x minutes alert him edits a lot of people are taking my comment a bit seriously it was mostly meant as a joke she seems very reasonable and practical such that she would probably be fine with the text it wasn't meant as a defense of the husband or to seriously imply that she needs to compromise more god damn the bar for men really is on the floor if we raise it any higher they may trip on it i just found that really funny what the [ __ ] is that posted by user guidance enough titled am i the a-hole for avoiding someone who is gay my social group has a guy who is flamboyantly gay and it's pretty much all their personality is about i've never been friends with this person nor do i wish to i'm a rather devout muslim and in my eyes it's not up to me to tell said person how to live their life but i can remove myself from situations where he is around i was happy to ignore him at first but he's very touchy feeling with people and just tried to kiss me on the cheek a few times every time i have pulled away or objected he said something snarking like ugh relax honey you're not going to catch the gay off me since then if he is at an event i just avoid him completely he has however taken it as a challenge to make me as uncomfortable as possible so that now i do not go to events at all this ranges from trying to touch me inappropriately mocking my religion usually with comments like stoned any gays recently or just insulting me we were supposed to have a barbecue this weekend and i was supposed to bring the barbecue as i have a proper one and a car to transport it i always divide up the barbecue so that there's no contamination between my halal meat normal meat and vegan and vegetarian options he mentioned that he was coming with some of his friends so the day before i put a message in the group chat to say something came up and i wouldn't make it he decided to call me out and said oh no the homophobe isn't coming i had enough and decided to leave the group i had a few messages from other people asking me why i laughed and such but i also had some messages from unrecognized numbers insulting me and calling me a homophobe i really want to say not the a-hole because he didn't directly do anything here from what it sounds he didn't directly attack this man he just avoided him because he didn't feel like hanging out with him wouldn't you avoid toxic people in your friend group regardless of their sexual orientation in this one it's easy to say that opie is an a-hole as well because they did it for the reasons that they were homosexual and they didn't agree with it obviously that can rub people the wrong way and i'm gonna call it like i see it i do agree with you guys i think that everyone sucks here in this situation but these other people much more so for going and attacking him i think it's shameful what they're doing to this man everyone sucks here it sounds less like you stopped being around him because he was gay but because of how he was acting towards you that he was mocking your religion and that he was insulting you but you were homophobic initially and that is not okay edits i'm guessing they changed it from not the a-hole to everyone sucks here after you said the reason you avoided him initially was because he was gay that's homophobic and your religious beliefs are no excuse it could also be a self-fulfilling prophecy here i am a lot more demonstrative with my girlfriend when i'm around someone who is obviously uncomfortable with the gays purely because i want to make them squirm i don't really have a problem with making a homophobes uncomfortable and if they decide to avoid me because of it that's a win-win with that said i totally agree that hitting on people and making physical contact when they're clearly uncomfortable is over the acceptable line trying to make other people uncomfortable with pda by flaunting your pda directly in front of them to antagonize them is a whole behavior regardless of your sexuality you can generally make a homophobe uncomfortable by holding hands or with a chaste kiss on the neck you can remain totally within the bounds of what you would see in a g-rated movie and still deeply offend their sensibilities i totally agree that avoiding the guy originally was homophobic and dumb but he said his reasons for avoiding him altogether was because the guy kept touching and trying to kiss opie on the cheek i don't like being touched and would totally avoid someone doing this too though i would use my words to explain that i don't like being touched everyone sucks here you definitely sound kinda homophobic but no one has the right to touch you and make you uncomfortable him calling you out repeatedly for your religion also isn't fair if it's really not about his sexuality why not just talk to women saying look your sexuality doesn't bother me but it makes me uncomfortable when people touch me and try to kiss me this with the exception that it absolutely is about his orientation everyone sucks here opie is homophobic as hell and throwing his hands in the air basically saying it's my religion what do you want me to do the other guy is being aggressively gay dopey probably because of rp's homophobic actions and on top of that touchy feely or no you don't touch someone who doesn't want you to touch them i agree this is homophobic behavior but for muslims they just avoid people they don't agree with which is what opie is doing he didn't deliberately antagonize the guy he just was uncomfortable with the touching and deliberately making him uncomfortable so he dipped he didn't go on a rant about how gays are going to hell or how sodomy is a sin or whatever he took himself away from the situation and when the gay guy took it upon himself to make this dude as uncomfortable as possible opie is homophobic but he didn't do anything as hollish outright in my opinion he just took himself away from the situation and then when the gay guy essentially tormented him he left like what else was he supposed to do the quran says leave alone those who are deceived by the life of this world which is what op did many muslims have non-muslim friends so long as the friend doesn't make every conversation about bashing islam and usually muslims just don't hang out with their friends when they go to clubs or some crap not the a-hole posted by user international c650 titled am i the a-hole for quote-unquote lying to my girlfriend about our first date two years ago so my girlfriend and i have been dating for two years now and our first date was just a simple walk in the park we got ice cream fed some birds talked with each other and it was fun my girlfriend thought it was insanely romantic and always looks back at it very fondly however the truth was that i took her out for a walk in the park not because i'm so romantic but because i used to hate being taken advantage of on first dates it would not be uncommon for a woman to go with me a couple of times and basically treat the whole experience as a free meal so as i grew older and wised up i decided that first dates would only be regular activities for me until i knew the other person was really into me my girlfriend and i went to small party of sorts last weekend and cara a woman who i dated very briefly four years ago happened to be there it was nothing serious we went on three dates never even had sex which is something my girlfriend already knew since they had met before my girlfriend got there first and i arrived a few hours later and during that time cara apparently told her that our first date was at a semi-expensive restaurant obviously my girlfriend only told me that when we got back to my place and we had a fight she asked me why did i only take her to a park when i used to take my exes to restaurants and all kinds of insecurities started coming out the only way that i could seem to calm her down was to tell her the truth that i didn't know her that well back then and i didn't want to risk what happened to me in the past that made her even more frustrated and she accused me of lying to her by a mission because apparently i let her believe i was a romantic when in fact i was just cheap i told her that this was unfair and pointed out that sheep is the last thing that she should be calling me when it comes to our relationship my girlfriend is a full-time student and doesn't have an income so i almost always end up paying for everything that we do she agreed that was unfair but she wasn't done lashing out so she said that if i'm not cheap then that can only mean i'm a misogynist because i assumed that she was just after a free dinner because she's a woman after that i had enough and told her to screw off with that nonsense and that i'm going to have a shower and that she's better calmed down by then am i the a-hole for lying by a mission i guess i could have told her the truth about why our first date was in a park but i never really saw the point really god this is a this is a yikes this is like watching your mum and dad fight isn't it i guess yeah he could be lying by a mission there but it's kind of just a response to all these terrible first dates that he's had before with people actually using him i don't i don't blame him for being defensive but i guess it's like one of those secrets that comes out when you're not intending it's to actually hurt the person it's more like hey i took on this habit as a protection mechanism and as a result you've been hurt by it but it doesn't mean i see you any differently that's my logic but i guess that both people suck here however blowing up and understandably being upset and him for lying by a mission i think that both of those actions do suck everyone sucks here i was leaning towards no a-holes here until the last couple of paragraphs you had some bad experiences that made you a bit suspicious she was disappointed to learn that something she thought was motivated by romance was motivated by that suspicion so far that's fine however these two parts that you said none of this is how you communicate in a healthy relationship you both need to grow up and learn to discuss things like adults for real op i was on your side until you told your girlfriend to eff off well do you often talk to her so disrespectfully yikes there are two people in your relationship you don't get to close the conversation and tell her to calm down if you need a break to calm down and then reapproach the conversation that's one thing but you can't just end it learn to communicate sure you do you don't have to cuddle someone who's disrespecting you like that bowing out is perfectly normal the failure to communicate lies with her not opie if she can't communicate her problems to her partner in a way that is not an attack then that is 100 on her i actually don't have a problem with him walking away for a bit sometimes space is a good thing so if he'd said something like i'm going to have a shower if you want to discuss this calmly when i'm done let me know then i would agree with you but to me telling your partner to frick off and that they'd better calm down before you get back put someone in the a-hole territory even if the partner was the a-hole first i don't know i kind of feel like freak off and calm down is 100 acceptable when in response to the fact that you adjusted your habits in response to bad experiences means you're a misogynist to a random stranger sure but to someone who's been your partner for two years who you're supposed to love and respect she could have reacted better but so could have op when people who are supposed to love and respect you start screaming at you and calling you names over something they're completely wrong about they lose any expectation of being treated with respect in return the whole tantrum she threw is rooted in sexism and she has the goal to call him a misogynist you want dinner at an expensive restaurant nothing stopping you from paying for it princess women like her give the rest of us a bad name that's ironically a pretty misogynistic way to think about that there's nothing to indicate that she wouldn't have paid her own way except she clearly didn't take him to an expensive restaurant but did expect him to bring her to one except she obviously didn't expect that because he didn't and she was fine with it what she appears to not be okay with is being treated like a b-list date when opie said it triggers insecurities i think he was right on the money this is what is known as intentionally taking words directly out of context he did not tell her to screw off he told her to screw off with that bullcrap those are two entirely different phrases with entirely different meanings he didn't tell her to get the hell out he told her to take that nonsensical fast of an argument elsewhere the use of very selective editing means you already know this otherwise you would have quoted this word for word we're all adults here let's have a debate about what he said not about things we know he didn't say not the a-hole he was in the right to shut down a ridiculous argument about sexism frankly he should bail she has way too many red flags not the a-hole your girlfriend is being super entitled i understand why you do what you do on first dates you were not obligated to take her to an expensive restaurant for your first date i can understand why your girlfriend might be disappointed but it sounds like you pay for everything you guys do so i don't know why she feels upset it would be different if you were showering exes with gifts while you were being super stingy with your girlfriends not the a-hole this is a red flag what other behaviors has she been exhibiting like this is she often angry or annoyed and why or is this the first time everything is a damn red flag to redditers i swear i would agree with you in general but do you not think that this is a really bad sign not just the fact that his girlfriend is upset about this but also the you're either cheap or a misogynist comments not the a-hole in my female opinion it would be a better alternative to me regardless of your reasons because it means you didn't do the same odd thing with me that you've done with all the other girls she's acting entitled as hell just because you took other girls out to dinner doesn't mean you have to take them all i also don't consider changing your first date tactic to be lying unless you specifically told her that your plan is to go to the park because it's romantic then it's not lying if she drew that conclusion on her own that's not your fault but your reasoning doesn't make it any less romantic either when you've been burned so many times it's reasonable to assume the next one will do the same thing honestly i'm starting to be swayed towards not the a-hole on this one people have kind of deconstructed the part where i think he would have been the a-hole and i'm starting to side with the boyfriends now all right i think that's where we're going to leave today's episode guys i really do hope you enjoyed the content today if you guys loved watching it as much as i loved making it i would love for you to subscribe to the channel already if you haven't tell me what you thought of it down in the comments below maybe like the video who knows i'd also like to take this time to thank my awesome patreon and channel members without you guys you know i don't know what i'd do i'd probably be homeless on the streets of ireland crying irish dancing all over town it would just be a mess but no for real you guys are up on the screen now thank each and every one of you guys and if you personally want to join the club yourself there are links down in the description below there's also the join button next to the subscribe button small monthly fee but hey it goes a long way to help me create more awesome content with that said guys i hope you do have a lovely day night sleep evening day at work day at school whatever you're up to i hope you keep awesome today you're looking amazing and i will see you in the next video bye

Channel: Markee

Views: 40,532

Rating: 4.9068828 out of 5

Keywords: aita, amitheasshole, r/aita, r/amitheasshole, aita reddit, markee, markee reddit, markee aita, markee amitheasshole

Id: Q3D0Nke1ex4

Length: 35min 1sec (2101 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 10 2020