r/AmITheA**Hole For Refusing To Accomodate My Overweight Friend?

g'day there guys supplementing my diet with another can of Pepsi back at it again with another episode of our /mi the a-hole now with that said I want you to sit back relax Chuck a prod on the barbie and enjoy the bloody good contents posted by user courier oh four to one titled z' am IV a hole for refusing to let my overweight friend ride my horse for the background I have two horses both are older mid to late 20s but one is very old nearing 30 small just above pony size and just under 1000 pounds and has some back and hip issues she's still in great shape for her age is very muscular and still enjoys riding we trail ride up the mountains near a barn usually one and a half to two hours of ride and they can be difficult and steep but she does great with me I am taller but way around 115 pounds when I bring my friends riding they ride the smaller older horse and I ride the younger one this is because the younger horse is very sensitive and not beginner-friendly whereas the older one is not sensitive and great for all levels of riding because of a fur mentioned issues I am selective about who I let her ride as it's difficult for her to not carry too much weight especially up the steep hills and for an extended period of time I have a friend who has well over 200 pounds does not know anything about horses and asked to ride with me I said no and was honest about why but still offered for her to come groom them and spend time with them on the grounds she went straight to the body shaming tactic I was skinny so I don't understand the horse is fine if she's always galloping around with me bigger people deserved to ride to she's shorter than me so it evens out I'm gatekeeping horses etc I just told him my horse was an animal with limitations not a machine and that I'm not gonna sacrifice her welfare to spare her feelings she was furious and we haven't spoken since who all are not also into horses think one ride would be fine and done being an a-hole about her weights I strongly disagree I even agreed with her that bigger people can ride they just need a horse suitable for their size and my horse is not that so am I the a-hole edits thanks for the responses guys this happened a few months ago but it does get brought up from time to time still so I was curious to see what this sub would think I understand a similar story was posted not that long ago that was not me I just joined reddit this week and I'm sorry for the redundancy but I didn't see that post beforehand edit to you I love sharing my horses with my friends and wish I had a bigger younger horse so I could take everyone riding I have many friends who have never ridden before because of wait some are in great shape and still too big for her some are overweight and too big for her those friends have enjoyed coming to visits and loving them on the ground and that invitation was extended to this friend as well she's not too big to ride in general she would just need a horse suitable for her and unfortunately neither of mine fit the bill her size and other issues unfortunately severely limits who I can take riding NTA the animals welfare comes before someone's feelings it's a crappy situation you found yourself in but you did the right thing there was no nice way of telling her no what more can you do that's exactly how I felt and tell my other friends who were involved in horses felts I was nice about it it's not like I straight-up told her you'll know you're too fat she also didn't understand why she couldn't ride the other horse he's actually usually very good but there are beasts bobcats and plenty of deer where we ride the deer sometimes spook him and he could easily unseat a beginner rider I wouldn't trust him with a beginner in a situation where we encountered some of the more dangerous wildlife but she didn't want to hear that either as someone who also rides I've never understood how people don't get that horses are not bicycles you can't just interchange them and have the same experience same handling same brakes I partly blame movies where people just jump on a random horse and carry along on their merry way there are a few jumpers in my band that if I just hopped on them it would probably end with my head cracking on a pole these are very delicate sensitive very large very fast creatures and sometimes very easily spooked creatures that you need to respect especially as a beginner edits public service announcements on behalf of the half dozen of Surrey cyclists who have politely clarified that bikes also have weight limits and restrictions and will Bend and break if too much weight is added not the a-hole and I say that as a plus-sized rider an older pony sized horse is not an appropriate mount for a heavier beginner thank you I would maybe consider it for a quick pony ride around the arena but the only option for riding that I have are these mountainous trails she even struggles a little with some of my lighter friends just because they're beginners and don't have the seat stability that she's used to from me yeah an unbalanced rider is tough at any weight on an older horse I wouldn't risk it even with a quick pony ride I wouldn't budge on this issue even for a quick ride around the arena your friend is being selfish and clearly doesn't have the best interest of your horse at heart here I think you should stand your ground even if it's just to make a point not the a-hole horses and not cars weight matters law even some cars with weak suspensions don't do too well with weight still pretty unlikely that the car will need event painkillers or a gun to the head posted by user sorry teach dang titled am I the a-hole for telling everyone our teacher has a dildo behind her at our zoom meeting so basically we were having a zoom meeting with our new English teacher a female in her mid-20s she has started teaching at the beginning of the year and I haven't really had a great relation with her during the zoom meeting her camera fell down so she had to fix it and didn't really do a good job at that and shared most of the room behind her and boom there at the corner of the bed and at least eight inch dildo I just shut my camera before I started laughing then texted our class's group chats and told them to look at that pink thing in the corner of the bed MERS just burst out laughing while some girls were telling me I was a piece of crap and down teacher was confused as hell until she looked behind her and almost screamed and said sorry like a billion times before disconnect I kind of feel like crap an important edits some guys took a screenshot and are using it as a meme edit - things are getting worse she was posted on a very popular Instagram meme page of our area and got about two thousand comments on that post damn I screwed up edit three I don't think I'm gonna keep updating this because it got out of proportion and it's not unread at scale anymore my teacher just did an Instagram live and she almost in a crying manner is telling people to please stop spreading this and she is getting harassed my parents will be talking to a lawyer soon people asked it's just in case she presses charges for harassment or something edit for last update this got absolutely out of hand and you will probably be hearing about it in some more online article it's already on very popular meme pages with millions of followers we asked the lawyer and she said it was fine to keep the post up and I'm in no legal trouble whatsoever and let's hope my teacher isn't fired edit five have been told by the lawyer to remove this you're the a-hole you don't need to scream it out to the heavens that's her private life and you embarrassed her just for the sake of getting some of your friends to chuckle you should apologize to her RP definitely owes her an apology hopefully her career isn't impacted too much but with high schoolers you never know 2,000 comments on an Instagram post unfortunately very likely that this is going to impact her career parents are going to be out with pitchforks soon she'll probably lose her job over this majority of the time if women teaches as seen as actual women and not neutered Barbie dolls they get screwed over by the school you're the a-hole honestly teachers of human beings she made a mistake it was completely unnecessary to share it with a group chat the screenshot and resulting meme could seriously impact her career it really can RP says he is 16 so we are likely dealing with high schoolers this will get out and around the school I can't see this not having an impact you're the a-hole honestly they're really strict with professionalism and the morality clauses with teachers by pointing that out you have probably caused the teacher to lose her job this response needs to be more visible she will lose her job she is now the infamous dildo teacher this is her new identity in the local community when other teachers or students parents bring up her name everyone's going to think of the dildo memes that is her new professional image school admin don't want to answer phone calls from parents who don't want this teacher around children because oh my god innocent Johnny saw that thing others might wonder if she's flirting with kids her presence in the school makes the district look unprofessional getting rid of her is very easy especially if she's a newer teacher before a teacher is tenured they work on a yearly contract and at the end of the year the principal is under no obligation to extend her contract so they won't offer her another contract and they don't have to justify why if they fired her right now there's paperwork involved they'd have to document various reasons to justify it but if they wait out to the end of the year and this is may they simply don't have to offer her a new contract and it doesn't matter why posted by user on tradition titled am I the a-hole for not letting anyone have any more weddings on our property even though it's tradition my husband and I earned this beautiful property just outside the city where lots of couples like getting married over the past 30 years since we inherited from family we have hosted many weddings as well as other events as the family members who owned it before us did we live in the city for our jobs so we would go out there on the weekends for all the events our plan was to continue doing this for another year then we would stop and both retire from our regular jobs and move on to the property since my job decided to make my work entirely online we thought it would be the perfect time to move up our plans my husband retired I'm going to continue working for another year and we're going to move into the house on the property when the whole thing with the virus happened we had eight weddings scheduled we of course refunded everyone's deposits and notified them that we would be closed for events since we've decided to go through with our plans I notified them and put on our Facebook page that our venue was not going to be reopening so far we've gotten the barrage of messages and posts on Facebook with a lot of people upset for example one woman was very upset and talked about how her daughter was going to get married there this spring and how everyone in the family had gotten married there and how she was the only one that isn't going to be able to get married there now a lot of people were applied to a comment saying the same thing that this property needs to stay open and that we are being selfish and ruining so many people's traditions by keeping it closed we don't want to keep it open it's just so much work for us the property in question also isn't very big so having a wedding here twice a month which is our average would be very disruptive the place people get married is right outside the house and the house itself was used for the wedding and usually has people going in and out of it we don't want all these people in our house once we are moved in edits some people seem to be confused so I'll just add that the eight weddings were cancelled because of the virus they were all during March April May and the last one was supposed to be this upcoming weekend when everything was still closed updates you guys have definitely gotten my husband paranoid now he's placing security cameras in gates I spent the day double-checking that everywhere online said we were closed I also ended up deleting the Facebook page and our other social media accounts all we have up now is the website with the closed notice I'm still getting some angry emails but as soon as I get done talking with the people that want to buy the chairs and the other wedding stuff we have I'm going to log off it my husband and I are considering having the place open just for some people who want to get portraits and other pictures taken but that's it we're just not up for any more big parties they said that we're being selfish and ruining so many people's traditions by keeping it closed they are the selfish ones all they care about is their own traditions and they don't give a crap about you or your family not the a-hole absolutely this the level of entitlement is astounding absolutely not the a whole and happy near retirement o P I was leaning to not the a-hole before that I can absolutely understand and why it would be upsetting to hear the venue is closing even though they got a refund for the deposits and I'm sure it's incredibly stressful trying to re plan a wedding right now with so many people's plans being upended at once but taking it out on ope like that is so wrong this is a generational event that is changing so many lives and Opie used it to change their business plans and move closer to retirement and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that cheers to all my Millennials living through our third generation defining events Jesus soft you're the a-hole but for only one reason the eight that you did cancel should have had the option to reschedule when quarantine is lifted rescheduling the date is hard enough but now they have to find a new venue on top of that as for anyone who was not yet scheduled they can deal with it traditions change whether it's you who decides to shut down now or whoever owns the property after you decide to I don't think that Opie is the a-hole for not offering to reschedule the ain't that it books but it would have been courteous and nice if they could have been accommodating finding a new venue on top of having to postpone everything must be mega stressful for them and I can understand why they would be upset the people who are upset about hypothetical future weddings that they may have wanted to take place there and just being a-holes though posted by user throw a redditor 78 titled mi the a-hole for telling a girl in my social circle that she's being a bully to the neckbeard in our group I'm 21 quarantine with my university flatmates three girls all 20 years old and two other guys that are 20 and 21 one of the guys will call Sam looks like the typical neckbeard he's largely overweight wears anime t-shirts unkempt facial hair and had spots Oh sounds like me however he only looks like the stereotype he's not creepy or holier-than-thou I've spent time with him and been to many parties with him he just suffers from sometimes severe social anxiety and low self-esteem well he went back home for something and I was in the kitchen with the rest of the flatmates one of the girls will call Amy immediately began roasting Sam by saying I'm so glad that ugly neckbeard is gone and how she doesn't have to look at him anymore honestly I immediately felt disgusted I don't like bullies I don't care where they're from or how they look like I was once treated like that and it isn't nice I immediately snapped at Amy and said you're bullying him and that's not cool she looked at me shocked I confronted her and things went quiet later my other male flatmate Henry said I was an a-hole for interrupting Amy and that she was only joking around and having fun I told him that he's complicit and should be ashamed but I do wonder whether I was an a-hole for embarrassing her am I the a-hole you are not the a-hole here but it's worth double-checking that the other women don't feel like he is creepy men often don't notice creepy behaviors the way women do especially since the creepy behaviors usually aren't directed at men I've checked this before he actually has a girlfriend who was into similar stuff he is into and she is usually at parties with us he's never one to show a lick of interest to other girls he just suffers from extreme social anxiety even in social situations I've asked some girls I know what they think of him and they just said he's just really quiet never had any girl tell me he's creepy and these girls usually tell me about which creeps to stay away from it definitely could be the case that some girls may see his extreme social anxiety sweating quietness shuddering as creepy maybe either way amy has never commented on his behavior just his looks she usually makes inside comments about other people who are less good-looking and this time she chose Sam as her targets a lot of the time neurodivergent behaviors for instance discomfort with making eye contact or having ticks or stimming or info dumping is seen as creepy oh god I suck with info dumping I'm just like take all my words here we go even when it's entirely harmless and just a little atypical people are bad at judging threats and often make hurtful judgments on very superficial things yes unfortunately people with anxiety get demonized as if they didn't have it bad enough already this le makes anxiety worse it's a vicious cycle this is important info to be honest I've experienced men in our friend groups being entirely oblivious to a mutual friends creepy behavior - what's women in the group because they just don't experience it or seeds before this info I was leaning - info and not the a-hole this completely turns it into not the a-hole for me edits I just want to point out that the additional info about her having made this into a habit in the Europeans was added after I made this comment before the extra info I thought and maybe it was a singular defensive comment she's made she's completely in a-okay posted by user expert yak 8 titled am I the a-hole for not allowing my husband's dying beasts to see my daughter one last time so this happened several months ago but it's still causing drama in the family my daughter three female who will call Emma was the firstborn child into my husband's family in nearly two decades my husband is much younger than his sisters and we had our daughter on the oldest side her cousins on that side of the family range from college age to 30s so instead of having 10 cousins it's more like she has ten additional aunts and uncles who want to dote on her which is nice I suppose but it's hard to make time for everyone and we wind up with an overabundance of gifts at the holidays and such so one of my husband's nieces who will call Sarah who's 23 had suffered from anorexia for several years we knew about this but it didn't seem severe and never affected the way she interacted with my daughter so we allowed her to continue to see her however in late 2019 apparently she took a sudden turn for the worse but she was sneaky about it so no one realized the severity until she wound up in the hospital apparently the doctors said it was rare for a case to worsen so quickly and they would probably be able to save her life but there was a moderate chance her heart would give out in the next week apparently after being told this she started making a list of people she wanted to see one last time in case and my daughter was one of the highest honors even though she'd only seen my daughter at family functions every month or two since she was born my daughter loved all her cousins including Sarah but it's not like they were overly close I understand that Sarah didn't choose to have anorexia but she did make a choice to hide from her family and doctors that it was getting worse until it was too late instead of getting help I was not going to traumatize my daughter by exposing her to an emaciated woman hooked up to machines wow that's that's bloody terrible I want to use strong language but Jesus Christ I told Sarah's mother that there was absolutely no chance I would bring Emma to the hospital for her visits even when she called begging several times Sarah died about three days later I didn't want Emma to know about what anorexia is at such a young age I could have probably just said Sarah was very ill but I was worried she'd figure it out in hindsight or something I think that Sarah and her mother should have understood this but no apparently Sarah asked when my daughter would visit an hour before she died she was surrounded by family and friends who were old enough to understand what was going on but apparently that wasn't enough traumatizing my daughter was some sort of dying wish her mother told my husband and I to not bother to come to the funeral and is still giving us the cold shoulder reddit's am i the a-hole here or is Sarah's mother just insane this sad thing is it's this is a very believably written story I don't I don't think that this is fake I think this is someone that's just really dumb there's obviously going to be people that have opinions it's like I wouldn't expose my kid to this that's fine I understand where you're coming from there I'm my argument here is the way she's putting it out there it's really really patronizing towards the other family like she has no empathy for them from the sounds of it you're the a-hole I was quibbling about it for a while because it makes sense that you'd want to protect your daughter even though I disagree with your point of view on this I really think it would have been a good lesson if anything for your daughter to see Sarah a lesson in empathy there you for one but then I saw this traumatizing my daughter was some sort of dying wish and well you are a huge a-hole for that you are so unable to see another person's point of view that you want to vilify a dead woman for her attachment to your child then I've reread and paid more attention and this jumped out at me which is nice I suppose but it's hard to make time for everyone and we wind up with an overabundance of gifts at the holidays and such seriously it's nice I suppose who complains about an overabundance of gifts and overabundance of love it sounds like you're jealous of the possible attachment between your daughter and your husband's family and you have this bitter and skeptical attitude about them all and want to view them in the worst light possible bringing a three-year-old to see someone who is near death emaciated and hooked up to a tube slash machine is a really horrible idea plus the three year old would not have been loving and cuddling she would have screamed and ran out of the room it would have been bad for everyone two or three year olds the world is both strange and not strange depending on what their parents say I've brought my three-year-olds to see their grandparents at the hospital hooked up on tubes and machines they reacted just fine because I gave them a short explanation of how this is how people look in the hospital where there are machines that help people so no most likely it wouldn't have been bad for anyone in any case there's such an attitude from Opie about a husband's side of the family that I get a feeling this is about her issues not her daughters it's too hard to predict how a child that young will react despite what you say to them it worked out fine for your kids but my niece had a phobia about hospitals for years after visiting her grandma there despite being prepared for it by her parents though I agree that Opie is a dick for her attitude in general about the family I wouldn't bring a child that young to visit someone that sick either not the a-hole your nieces family is grieving asking you for this was understandable punishing view for it is not not wanting your baby to see someone wasting away in a hospital bed is totally reasonable I scroll down to find this thank you I'm a child psychologist and mom is totally in the right for not wanting to bring in her daughter and the niece had a right to ask this could have been communicated by mum much more gently but there's no need for a toddler to be around someone dying unless there's a close relationship there everyone is cuckoo in this thread if her kid was 13 yeah different story but her daughter is 3 no a holes here not a hole can't believe the judgments here I mean your general demeanor is a whole ish but you were absolutely right about not bringing your three-year-old to the hospital everyone is pulling anecdotal evidence out of their butts like that has any bearing on whether or not this would cause lasting harm sometimes the kid is fine and sometimes the kid is traumatized for years over stuff like this there is no level of preparedness that can guarantee one reaction or another everyone here seems super cavalier about your child's mental health but you are not the a-hole for this posted by user through RA 4480 titled mi the a-hole for threatening to kick my sister into her children out during a global pandemic my 20 female sister 30 female has two kids that have five and seven she recently divorced her husband and is temporarily staying with me because she has nowhere else to go she could move in with our parents but for some reason she decided to stay with me for a few days few days turned into months because of the pandemic and so here we are I honestly don't mind I love her and I love the kids what I can't stand is her behavior bare with me now this is gonna sound very bizarre my sister is very religious she has a Facebook group whatsapp group has an Instagram where she has about 5,000 followers she's probably also on reddit's and many other social medias usually she's nice and sweet but lately she's become somewhat crazy she has these quote-unquote sessions with her kids every few days these sessions lost about half an hour during these sessions she teaches her kids about the LGBTQ community not good things but she teaches them about how being gay is a sin and all of that being transgender is a disease how to avoid getting infected cetera she tells them to repeat words after her and then make a video and uploads it everywhere oh geez I feel bad for her kids it's very very bizarre she gets a lot of likes on social media where like-minded people praise her and upload similar videos of them having these sessions with their kids she's part of this group trying to lead the new generation to the right path her little daughter who is 5 as the sentence is memorized being gay is a sin you will burn in hell is her answer if you ask her what do you think about gay people the problem is I'm bisexual my sister conveniently forgets that no you're not you will get over it when you meet the right person is what she tells me when I mention it this is my house I will not tolerate her disrespecting me in my own home I told her that as long as she stays in my house eats my food uses my things she's not allowed to have these sessions in my living room this led to a massive argument where she bragged about her followers refused to listen to me insulted me and refused to apologize I ended up threatening her I told her she can't live here if she behaves this way which made her cry now I'm the heartless selfish a-hole in my family who threatened to kick her poor divorced sister and her little kids out in the middle of a global pandemic I would obviously never do that to her I only wanted her to stop being homophobic besides she can always go to our parents I have apologized countless times even to my parents but I'm being repeatedly called heartless am I the a-hole for wanting my sister to stop being her a phobic and I the a-hole for threatening her to get her to stop and it's looks like this post summoned all the homophobes to one place I get that it's a sin in your religion but I don't fudging care can you please refrain from sending me insulting messages telling me to accept it [ __ ] read and move on you don't have to go out of your way to be so mean to all the people who were nice thank you so much I appreciate the support I received it's nice to know that at least some people don't think I'm heartless thank you guys not the a-hole I wouldn't have apologized your sister needs help her children need help your sister is terrible yeah my take on that is you set a precedence if you do apologize for that if it's something that you don't actually feel the need to apologize for because then they're just going to take advantage of that apology and demand more from you if your firm about your opinion from the get-go if it's reasonable I would I would argue this situation as reasonable then she doesn't need to apologize she needs to say it's my way or the highway you're not using my living room I'm sorry parents are right there you're out the door I don't agree with this I'm not even I'm sorry how I always caught myself there agreed Opie isn't the a hole here and shouldn't have apologized but she would definitely be the a-hole if she keeps on tolerating the bigotry and hate RP as the only sane adult black-and-whites you and your sister it is your responsibility to not let her create an army of future hateful people starting with your niece and nephew young minds are easy to fill with garbage which your sister is doing you will regret it the day you might get a girlfriend and your own niece and nephew whom you love to bits start throwing the rotten garbage in their mind through their mouths at you be wise and start countering your sisters sessions with your own you can't compete against everybody but at the least you can start with it at home rest of the world aside please stop your own loved ones into becoming your own haters this isn't a good idea right now I agree that your kids need this sort of session but if you try to take over parenting responsibilities and start contradicting their mother you are weaponizing the kids against their mum you aren't going to be able to deprogram them over the word of their own mother especially at the ages of 5 to 7 and it will just cause a lot of damage to your relationship with them the best thing I can do is be kind and caring arts and should a future come to pass where the kids need a non-parent adult to talk to to make herself available if she makes herself come off as a wonderful human being and she starts dating a woman it may be enough to make the kids reconsider their mom's teachings even if it's not for another 15 years and they are both adults trying to intervene when the kids of this young is not going to work the way you or I would hope it not a hole your sister is a hypocrite I'm so tired of people just picking what sins to be offended by either way if everyone thinks he was such an a-hole then maybe it would be better if she went to stay with them you are wonderful people to allow your sister to stay with you you have every right to stand up for yourself agree with the hypocrisy isn't divorce prohibited exactly ob tell her that you'll see her in hell for divorcing her husband's not the a-hole and I suggest that you stick to what you told her and throw her out if she doesn't stop insulting you in your own house whoa Jesus I think that's all I have to say for this one I feel like I gave some good constructive advice and it's gonna a lot of people aren't gonna be happy with it a lot of people aren't gonna be happy with it tell me what you thought of it down in the comments let's see what our outer marquee has to say today g'day there guys out Rumaki here hope you enjoyed the episode as much as I enjoyed making it today if you did be sure to LIKE comment and subscribe tell me what you thought about it down below also if you like memes be sure to head on over to my second channel marquee - it should be one of the sexiest rallyin faces on screen the one without the flag it's my latest and greatest creation and I hope you like it also I'd like to give a huge shout out to my channel members and patreon subscribers you guys do so much good for me and the support goes without saying but I'm gonna say it anyway I love you guys and I appreciate all the help and support you provide me on this channel also if you want to join the family links it down in the description below or click that join button next to the subscribe button anyway guys I hope you enjoyed that one today I'll see you in the next one bye

Channel: Markee

Views: 38,545

Rating: 4.9043927 out of 5

Keywords: aita, amitheasshole, r/aita, r/amitheasshole, aita reddit, markee, markee reddit, markee aita, markee amitheasshole

Id: ZjItNIEB_P8

Length: 32min 46sec (1966 seconds)

Published: Fri May 29 2020