Quick-witted Craig Ferguson + More

but we really are out of time unless you want to take a dress off will it be another 10 minutes with you yeah but not on the air all right I understand that gradually Lily everybody actually in the film where am i I cop a feel of his man-boob you might want to translate that for the American audience papa feel abit man means I suppose it means you put your hand on his gentleman's upstairs breast area his pectoral muscle hi gently stroked the gentleman was man boob you fell Chris Evans who plays Captain America I don't think he has man boobs though he's got firmly areas but they were absolutely enormous though I mean you know coming from you that's a hell of a thing to say I or man yes they based it out but we can't go this is life all sorts of fun yeah it's a fully equipped ski cabin great middle of blazing up admit of a blazing Hollywood blaming Hollywood Fleming's sure yeah you have harmonicas yeah do you blew the both organ I do you how do you think I got this job [Laughter] no because it's got that like rubbery texture is the matter I was going so now you miss your day or texture I do I do things we based my - would you like soft foods are hard I don't like clementines the way they kind of taste in your mouth I mean the small orange clementines mandarins mandarins tangerines clementines they're all kind of the same thing I look forward to your letters I think though there are small tasty fruit they break apart in your mouth and a really kind of unpleasant way you don't like that yeah what do you like to feel in your mouth a it's a perfectly legitimate question to some water bases their diet on tax junk what kind of texture do you enjoy crunchy you know sort of reliable reliable it was your your mother was married to my father to your father hey these things you know my father was a man named Eddie Fisher and he they were best friends with Elizabeth Taylor and her husband at the time Mike Todd Mike Todd tragically tragically died away in a plane accident and my father consoled Elizabeth with his penis [Applause] I love you I've always loved you I love you more every time I see you so you were in the Army as a child yes I was like a prodigy Nikita style can you do that can you do all that kind of I can't write but I can really pretend I could pretend my ass off don't do that pretend something else [Music] some things you should just leave the way they are I know what I'm saying you know I got the young child in the house oh yeah yeah how you doing that's so okay all right now yeah it's pretty good you know - he's a parrot he just he repeats everything I say repeats everything using everything [Laughter] yeah all right so so truly like scary David David I don't wanna go I'm not going I'm just saying oh no I get scared enough look at I got that [ __ ] over that's get Rocky I got enough scares going on in my life and then and then there's Beth right next to God posing a bride well that's lovely I are you good at driving I'm brilliant I'm an excellent driver yeah what well you really know I am how hard is the test here oh yeah I have to reset that when I came why no no oh because you came over from from yeah you know no I I have to be sympathized here but it's easy oh yeah Ellie you said did you that place in Santa Monica or the one in Hollywood oh yeah it's just drive around the block don't shoot anyone you're good so that's good are you gonna go in road trips and stuff I don't know yeah maybe you know you're what is he a gay robot schedule isn't it C is a scalar and sees a robot it's named Jeff I thought what what have you done that's Gary over here I'll show you I'm buying this offered the car off a German person that doesn't qualify you as having visited these people have never been to Japan buy us booze just buy he must be very German a few Germans in Ontario really that's how it starts get to ant are you you don't wanna know they March the mr. eyes it yes no but I did dressed as a nun in the movie did you it's so hot those habits our boys yell amazing oh yeah here alright one of the big American Banker you read Japanese burnished British bike yeah Royal Enfield no a Norton commando on commando I've also had some American alright but do you still ride yeah well a little bit I know it since my last accident kind of like note the window my sales a little bit happen to you yeah I was on one of them V rods and I tried to go around a corner were you at a high rate of speed what's the point of being on all baked yeah [Music] you must met you are your very private guy I mean hardly and people don't know and about you man not a thing I thought you'd ruin an American baton you had proper legs are you very careful about that yeah seems wise yeah I'll take a pomegranate look wait before you look at it cuz a lot of other things I think of that look at that you probably like that you'd rate a bridge but is it theirs yeah pomegranate they're good one of them there's one oh look at this is a little bit like your name tea wanna know what's a kiwano it's a very enigmatic fruit man people don't really know much about it I mean it's very popular and the girls enjoy it but nobody knows I'm a bit of a wiseass sometimes I know the commercial break yeah sure let's go to a commercial break all right this is from Matt in Portland in Oregon who says that Deer Creek my wife insists you used to be a hand model and I see otherwise please set the record straight and tell her it's bunk actually well I don't know look at these babies I'm not exactly a how was never you know everything a career thing but I did get a couple of hand jobs when I first moved to good point yeah I know it is you were having this show I've noticed you better how you wear hat on the show which is a shame because you've been such a lovely head but it's been such a big deal it's funny I I thought like this hat and represents this character like she has an attitude and when you have a hat on there's a woman it's an attitude and so you know it makes you feel like you have an attitude to new mate do you feel like you have an attitude like a giant head that's too too small this is Che Guevara yeah I know it's nice it looks good I know but I'm surprised that you choose to wear huh cuz you're famous for your head I am I can't everybody thinks your head is fantastic man don't listen to this man to say aha cuz you've got bread but then you should have become a pharmacist or a doctor a doctor what kind of doctor is your system internal medicine so all our work is done indoors what does that mean internal medicine that means like it's all organs no she doesn't do here oh you you saying lawyers are corrupt no I would never say [Music] man I hate lawyers I do you're not a lawyer are you before you were an actress you didn't sneak in about a law and did you what's in that what's in this confidence [Applause] have you always been this quick some things I some things I am a little slower with such as physical activities and I should have a banana yeah what's your blood type I'm an A so I'm an A+ yes you are [Applause] [Applause]

Channel: The Jayleno Fly

Views: 10,215,677

Keywords: クレイグと女の子の女性, クレイグ・ファーガソン, ロボットをゲオフ, craig ferguson, craig ferguson and the ladies, flirting masterclass, funny late night, best talkshow, funny talkshow, talkshow compilation, talkshow moments, flirt talkshow, geoff the robot, the jayleno fly, funny moments, super happy fun time hour with robot and old man, quickwitt craig ferguson, quickwitt with craig ferguson, quick-witted craig ferguson, craig ferguson fast jokes, craig ferguson quick jokes, funny craig ferguson

Id: 7Z8y5_xyzMk

Length: 12min 16sec (736 seconds)

Published: Wed May 02 2018

Reddit Comments

[u/kevinbrueck]

I used to be a page at CBS (like Kenneth from 30 Rock except we had red jackets) and I used to work on the Late Late Show. I'll never forget the times he'd come out on stage just before taping began and they've got all of Craig's monologue jokes queued up and ready to go. He'd turn to the stage director and say, "Put those away. I'm just gonna wing it tonight." And then he'd launch into a ten minute monologue about WHATEVER and it would absolutely kill. He'd just come up with this stuff off the top of his head. Craig Ferguson is hands down one of the funniest, most quick-witted comedians I've ever had the pleasure of seeing in person.

[u/ale_del_diablo7]

Netflix get him a god damn show already.

[u/nocontroll]

"Do you know how to play the mouth organ?"..."I don't know...um... do you know how to play the mouth organ?"...."Well, how do you think I got this job?"

That's hilarious

I also love Craig because of his openness about his alcoholism. I quit a while ago and he was a major inspiration as to how to change your mindset when it comes to it. "It's not a drinking problem, as much as it is a THINKING problem". We both quit about the same age and for the same reasons and I think he's an amazing guy.

[u/solidsteve21]

I still watch reruns on YouTube all the time, he really was the greatest. Sad to know that he doesn’t miss it at all.

[u/momania79]

Oh god do I miss him. By far the best late night host.

[u/Lufenia]

Careful, Icarus.

[u/[deleted]]

I was at his show years ago and he basically improvised the entire thing, he's incredibly entertaining

[u/teadrinkit]

Do I make inappropriate jokes to people I don't know? No.

Do I occasionally make inappropriate jokes (from just bad your mom jokes that aren't funny to jokes about gasp sex) that are within an A) appropriate context to people I know and B) know for sure that they would be okay with it? Yes.

The difference here between Cosby and Craig is

1) Transparency. One tried to hide it. The other is not.

2) Context for both parties. Both parties in Craig's show know what they are getting into.

3) Consent. I shouldn't have to explain this.

[u/bobdole5]

As others have noted the first clip requires some context, but to give even further context they've had several interviews together and they both walk the line. Evangeline Lilly can give as good as she gets and arguably she started it