polygon's bdg out of context parts 1 through 10!

and then we ran out of time about halfway through so i went out to grab some lunch but it started to rain so i ate a chicken sandwich drenched that has nothing to do with the video i just wanted you to know my pain now let's get into the fun part and it's not because i'm a prude who doesn't love a little erratic lizard fiction come on baby [Music] [Applause] [Music] wait where'd toad man go where's my guy toad man toadman clowns don't serve a purpose you have to fast travel by being eaten alive by a worm it's me some thieves can't read if you can't read get someone to read this book to you it'll make more sense than nick they don't ever mention that they're essentially just garbage diamonds the ones that are good everyone knows that poetry and theater are meant to be seen and not read and i don't need any more reason to be afraid of looking at myself in the mirror where is my sonic game with a quilting circle they will tell you when they're upset and also when your parents are gonna die here in my skyrim book report [Music] skyrim book report who was a robot sent from the future to destroy the world and he's also an air conditioning unit he's not a sentient murder robot he's a sentient picture frame before he became evil and also a bit of an egg pump man's flavor text explains that sometimes he'll volunteer to wash off graffiti and no one likes a gnar my second reaction to this was what the [ __ ] hey todd what the [ __ ] this one's for you wagon technically not murder definitely bad i haven't been tainted i have never beheld the false sonic dj jazzy j48950 is a boombox get out of here fun fact about academic books that i learned in college is that no one has ever enjoyed writing or reading an academic paper why'd you put it in a video game i call this category no i'm choosing to think of that as something like nuclear fission as opposed to choosing to think of it as dumb turns out she's dead why the [ __ ] is he a top they are valid and they're wrong strikeman sounds cool but he's just a baseball throwing machine either sonic is a god or could kill god and i do not care if there is a difference but just when all hope seemed lost i had an epiphany i am going to throw myself into the sea these are nebulous but they're definitely not good for sonic i'm willing to bend my values a little bit shoo there is no way you can manage to maintain that level of erotic tension for seven acts that's like five and a half hours please don't show that to me anymore please get get it out of here stop i didn't tab it out because it's a shitty story this skyrim book report what issue okay this fight instead of a hobbit it is a mid-level bureaucrat number three can this monster get it you got a chaos emerald you should probably go wash your hands now i'm not the most surprised i lulled you into a false sense of security i'd like to see them try i would like to see them try come on here's the big rule of thumb magicians are always evil so the game is basically an evil polluting scientist being taken down by a midwestern teenage hedgehog track star with daddy issues sure oh god i gotta have another baby riveting let sonic cry over the loss of what could have been sega you cowards let's find castlevania's most eligible bachelor [Music] goddammit jrr tolkien we have e what genre is e humans are trash these are very boring and these are slightly more palatable humans are real squishy really when you think about it biblical literalism is just an early form of fandom what's he good for titrations that's a chemistry necromantic romantic book now i do not feel at all qualified to discuss the philosophical implications of that but i really do think we should include hyena with gun that hyena can get it this is a teacher kids with skyrim teach the kids with skyrim in the japanese version he isn't called yorick he's called soccer boy star man not that i'm [ __ ] on the coast guard they do do go i'm digging myself in a hole why'd they make him a toad we've done some [ __ ] to bees y'all get out of here never knew his father cause he was reduced to sludge thanks to corporate pollution hard man [Music] i'm just not into toilet stuff in my skyrim book reports can i get a whoop whoa you we'll work on it but it's time for us to bring it back we also have a bunch of characters that are sonic robots that is an affront to nature don't let me suck more than i can handle and if you'll excuse me i'm going to go throw myself into the ocean now subsection r steel erection i need to know where donkey kong pees i'm gonna call this the time break the time bridge let's go clean it right now let's start with books who really has the time to read all those books i do apparently i'll read an excerpt for you so you can understand the basic concept of this video and also the hellscape i had to slog through the past week look at this polar bear he has no [ __ ] clue what's going on you thought you could get away with that shitty ass ladder [Music] you cannot hide your ladders from me i just saved your ass with monopoly we'll start from the beginning hi i'm brian david gilbert safety fan and bureaucratic vunderkind please address me as such it's like a lot of time between the first hero and i'm a big jarf head folks we're about to engage in a friendly session of biblical literalism he go-karts and he fights people for sports and unfortunately there isn't an osha guide to bloodsport violation violation violation violations and then it's another existential crisis but this is my favorite one they didn't choose to be born who does choose to be born right who chooses why am i the only scholar in time break studies number 11 sonic helps quilters reggie take [ __ ] notes when you walk into an unknown space i want the first question on your mind to be am i safe to smash and if someone comes up and introduces themselves to me as duke mirage my pants are already off i love rupees no contractor or subcontractor contracting for any part of the contract work that's a real line jarthy did it again and while we are hanging out in the time break sonic's here sonic's in the time break baby ganon's back baby tingle is um the perfect evolution of humanity patrick thinks it shouldn't be this high on the list but [ __ ] patrick i cut one of the titles in half clayton we have to start over and that means that joseph gordon-levitt exists in the zelda timeline the potential energy i shall release into a holy flame so that i might burn out the blasphemy from sonic's modern iteration i think uh we should probably just take a couple minutes just to just like okay oh do you need water or anything water yeah i think that'd be good yike feel like a christmas ham put your toys away honey just let me game mom this is so boring but what about the time break the time i'm sure that where ever had terribly it didn't last long joseph gordon-levitt doesn't exist in any timeline [Music] what every osha violation in every stage in super smash brothers ultimate where's link where's link i'll get to it don't worry i'll get to it thanks nshady16 for making me read 684 pages of osha regulations you piece of garbage i [ __ ] love candles i swear to god if i get one well actually comment it's a lost cause right he's a wind sorcerer he defeats the thing and forces them to form fraternal bonds in the crucible of battle ugh history's so boring i'm done with this let's do the child one stop jumping the time break high time the time he's finished his entire meaning of existence by the time he's like 12 after he is fused with the powers of the chaos emeralds and a hard-boiled egg not a joke the reason i think he deserves a chance is because someone named him nurgle muslamste how does he do it legend of zelda monopoly jerry seinfeld taught me that through love all things are possible they're on a live race track all of the things are moving everyone all the time everywhere and also sonic which is great because you go oh those legs are way too human link just can't do it in this one you made me use monopoly like in basketball over there i don't know how to categorize mother brain but what about zelda clue we have adult link child link basketball and then dies in the ocean [Music] i couldn't give a [ __ ] about death also you could send me kirby's phone number i know he is real where are you hiding him folks i hear you i hear your questions constantly they come to me in my dreams like a prophet receiving visions from an angry god link gets resurrected i can't go any further than that i'm sorry this [ __ ] heel of a monkey he carries around a hot thing of coals and a spoon more than that he has this tender leadership quality that makes him not only respected but loved by his peers and then above him is a [ __ ] t-rex because despite what he has written in his memoirs he's never actually been active duty and he's a valor stealing bastard freshly picked tingle's rosy ruby land also scribblenauts unlimited is here too i haven't necessarily figured that one out get [ __ ] mr x all warfare is based on deception if your opponent is of choleric temperament seek to irritate him steal their hats uh link is really into trains now for those who can superbly smash before i go to number one i gotta go get a flu shot this is not a joke it's important to get your flu shot when i die will i become dry brian i'm not gonna name my son nair every time you pick your nose instead of using a tissue that's in the emerald y'all remember those things those little rules that keep you from committing war crimes and before you get upset with me saying brian aren't you just starting a cult look at this question answered by cute girl core technically speaking religions and cults are the same thing cult wants to resurrect canon or something there is too much ventilation in the form of this man and then the whole world floods and we get wind wake you don't need me to tell you it's broken but quick shout out to stair face ogre a dumb 35 year old man who lives in his parents house and then he gets sucked into a book and then he goes into tingles land and he becomes tingle who hired this man i don't want him on my job sites together and i'm also going to try to fit i wouldn't waste paper like that she thought pit cross would help him beat zanz not everyone can double jump think about that nintendo you made me care about hyrule warriors zelda chess [Music] there's no plot line in zelda chess no one would describe pd piranha as capable in literally any circumstance because i do want to save at least a little bit of paper uh obviously i don't want to save paper that much i'm ignoring the fact that they're fighting on top of a jet and instead thinking about how loud those jets are pop some earplugs in i'm gonna trip and stub my toe four swords adventures which is different from four swords one has adventures they're like 11 or 12 or 18 different endings when i was a kid my mom thought that i had a nutritional deficit because i kept wanting to eat mushrooms so much like that i ate only mushrooms for like a whole week that has nothing to do with this and today i'm honoring those who have put their lives on the line for a megalomaniacal turtle none of them will save you so what i'm going to go to next is violation what's left every other type of meaning wimps and swamps and wimps and wumps and grindels and spindles and grolls there's talks box and flops and romps and bumps and walleyes and wallops and they're all pretty much invincible and they will crush you without hesitation like a cartoonish sherman's march to the sea should you read every book in skyrim no what is a living bowser wet bowser look at his gloom look at this colombo is a shy guy a helicopter masahiro sakurai his very name strikes fear into the heart of man and mushroom alike and he's also pretty good at figure skating and they were nice because they learned that lake would [ __ ] their [ __ ] up you should be less worried about getting punched into oblivion and more worried about the cancers and it's breath of the wild you could have stopped at just one stage you should have stopped at just one stage next we've got the bros serious snake man [Laughter] i don't care how good you are at surfing funky kong there's fire there are jacks that get thrown across the stage there is a large ape again i could not categorize that but i know he shouldn't have been there why do piranha plant have bone in it or 17 million 34 078 dollars in fines if there's one strategy that bowser's military understands better than anything else it's stealing hats over here in basketball timeline we've got ripened tingles balloon trip of love then link goes away on a journey into the water and then he dies [Music] death flies through the window and breaks the glass that's right it's darkness baby i'm in a real tough situation right now and i just need to get through the month please how does that sound alright you happy god has cursed me for my hubris and my work is never finished and what better way to show your dedication than to be literally shot from a cannon educational wrap flow and that's defined as a wrap wherein you could include an anti-drug line and it wouldn't stand out of place and that is no good is it is it i actually i'm a little confused now twilight and then the shadow and i put jesus next to garfield we have major squizzard and i'm gonna gloss over him because his name makes me uncomfortable ditto cloister caterpie sandshrew friends got weed just say no thank you there are other bs legend of zelda games fight me didn't mean to carry on my point in this verse is that alienating drug users makes things worse don't lock someone up if they take a hit mon chan and criminalizing addicts is a really bad plan big pharma is the root of our country's problem with opiate addiction that's a smash cut hopefully if i do my editing correctly three it was supposed to be prop water pack how dare you jettison my gift tangela arcanine tangola arcanine tangola rk9 kevin punt made me trade terry for rk9 and i will never forgive him what was mario doing with that penguin child he already feels bashful you didn't need to pants the man you might remember him as that helpful guy who picks you up in mario kart but he actually got his start in carpet bombing i think i should include a little memory of my favorite boy it's got the round soft body of a day one rotc recruit but there's ambition in those eyes because not even death can excuse you from service in bowser's army got nothing better to do might as well just go have fun and you know what i respect that but you did forget that ganondorf got resurrected and then the whole world flooded so that's on your conscience what you are about to see is the culmination of decades of research if miyamoto doesn't like email me after this video goes up and say brian you've cracked the code i'm never gonna play another zelda game ever again hey i'm including magma as a flammable liquid i know they mean petroleum substances but i think that's just a lack of imagination on osha's part and by harm's way i mean in front of mario uh where can you find pleasure search the world for treasure um where can you begin to make your dreams all come true on the land on the sea in the name but again i do still need you all those pokemon names because if you don't matt will murder me the bully for the lava group and the chill bully for the ice group who's exactly like the bully except he'll kind of go easy on you if he can tell you're having a rough day it's more mature than the goomba and also its name has an extra syllable and is way more fun to yell i don't think nintendo would actively create a war criminal and then allow him to sit in the back seat of a go-kart with a baby you're not supposed to be working underneath hovering craft even if they're bringing you fruit every time you wear your underwear five times in a week because you think it doesn't smell that bad that's in the emeralds in most places you have to have exit signs and also you have to have exits that don't involve plummeting to your death the gushen because its name is the gushen and i had to learn that its name was the gushen and now you need to know that it's called a gushin as well it's just a tumbleweed and some jordans some people want the most bang for their buck feels kind of weird to put the mythical legendary and ultra beast pokemon in with the pokemon peasantry as i call them does a pokemon count as an energized circuit according to osha yes the amount of frames per game the game frames mainframe you know about swamps but did you know that there are thwimps and the womps have wimps i'm gonna take those off your face and replace them with the pragmatic transitions lenses of reality bowser needs a military hierarchy because of the geneva convention but how many frames does a gamer game in the game frame mainframe there are no acceptable entry conditions into a space with a pitfall of acid the hammer bro the fire bro every bro in between uh you can learn more about them in the hbo series band of brothers i assume i've never watched the show the goal is education not entertainment pat start the hype up music it's the stews strolling stroll and stew soaring sword and stew swiping swiping stew smaller mario is a war criminal he just gets really into fashion in triforce heroes which is what i plan to do in my midlife crisis no one has to write any more goddamn think pieces about this topic ever again i got a creative writing to greet [Music] that's all i have to say about that i bore this burden for you i'm already sweaty and the show hasn't started i don't know why you clicked on this video so that's on you [Applause] but not just yet um i have to i got a couple other things that i got to take care of this is a lot of research into things that really have very little meaning and roxas is on summer vacation then we might take ma champ who's a super powerful wonderful pokemon and put him next to concolder god's mistake in the pokemon universe and bowser's fursonas because those should never be exposed to the horrors of war uh they act more like civilians to be honest oh my god they're civilians the emotional whiplash i feel going from dratini what a sweet one oh growlithe a nice cute fire puppy isn't that oh god oh no no no no no please get no oh no cute i'm okay and it might surprise you to hear this but i have not been in a pure mathematics class in about five years number two how them graphics and even when your uncle devin comes up to you at the holiday get-together and says hey brian what in the heck is this fortnite thing it gives you a common ground to chat and you really haven't chatted with uncle devin in a while you should call him more often he wants to show you his civil war books and his collection of swords and what better way to show your dedication than to be literally shot from a cannon like having literally all of their torso punched out from under them and still maintaining a smile main powers include being a snake what do you do after you find out about that power you nord a boy and tear around each other's throats when someone expresses an opinion that is slightly different from our own hey this is a thing i'm just gonna call that the anti-heroes cradle so the original pokey rap is no gazant kunstferk that's right i went there yeah i'll say it again but we all know what a ghazal kunstwork is so i'm going to carry on riku who's actually being possessed by ansem who is the heartless version of tara xehanort who was originally terra but then was possessed by xehanort before him they will kill me if i do not see it done before the end of this panel time thank you for your service and everyone knows that you can't get full credit unless you show your work but i'm gonna say it anyway his father took a bullet for bowser back in the korean war so now he's a general like when he sent the brutals to perform the extrajudicial killing of professor egad yoshi made bert the bashful's pants fall down but baby mario gave the order one the shortcomings of the original poke wrap two the development of a better pokey wrap and three once you got that boy under your possession time to get real into unethical science it's time for the special forces called the funny parade it's the funny parade and could i really call this an unraveled if i didn't spend a whole day reading 224 pages of dense legalese for no good reason of course i couldn't of course i couldn't in the words of my mother puts a lot of research into things that have very little meaning and now that you're jazzed and ready to go time to fail would you say you are a math expert no but i do claim to be an expert in one thing that will help us make this pokey wrap a little bit sexier feet how about them graphics is that thing where the hero goes on a journey into his inner thoughts and finds some data that an old guy put in him it's that thing that happens in the hero's journey we're gonna make this easy to remember and call it the hero's memories of the hero's journey doublecross oblong or hmhjxxo whatever you call it it's going to help me say a lot of pokemon names in quick succession without sounding like a cop but in order to complete my pokedex i had to go to kevin punt he gets norted so he's not that good of a hero maybe i shouldn't have made my mom's knowledge of the game an exponential factor you know tetris you would really like this no i stand by that decision so i reached out to some scientists and then none of them got back to me i'm the only one who cares about this it's kind of like if i bought 12 ikea cabinets and then i used the pieces to build a gundam or as true literary critics call it boarding the gummy ship the mom variable which stands for my own mother so i called my own mother for help it's my own suburban mother and should all acquaintance be forgot and all that jazz that's a fool's errand brian you are a fool they called me a fool but do i look like a fool to you you sweet summer child you babe swaddled in the cashmere blanket of ignorance you ask too little of me buckle up this is gonna be a fun presentation next up the michael sarah's into kingdom hearts one uh nope you got a birth by sleep it's a prequel but is sora in it no no sora who's this guy then that's vanitas wow otaru no taru but are you happy with just those two versions of yourself you shouldn't be because you're a villain you absolute fool you child what does a gamer walk tell me what does the game want and that will give us the amount of frames per game the game frames mainframe but how many frames does a gamer game in the game frame mainframe hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours hours mortal comfort [Music] innovation key number five reptile is responsible for the genocide of several other species and he also doesn't moisturize and one of those has got to be a deal breaker what a silly coincidence well i guess we don't need these anymore and speaking of harsh realities [Music] i'm not dancing this season excited energetic and can i be honest with you a little bit distraught okay at kingdom hearts two which will begin with sora going into what do you mean nope there's two more december 30th new year is at our doorstep knock knock who's there it's 2019. come on in hope you're not as big of an [ __ ] as the past few of your friends is sadistic incredibly powerful and just covered head to toe in baby oil aaron black is a tough talking cowboy who will dote on you way too much once you got that boy under your possession time to get real into unethical science i don't know why don't you ask timon and pumbaa they've they're from the lion king that was a movie the disney a lot of people think it's a great movie munchie is just a clammy little wizard a caillou-looking [ __ ] also she's a sandy hook truth what hell yeah what no wait telekinesis babe because he gets nordic possessed by anthony [Music] is cat's the musical but with more guns and a better plot line this part of the formula is so revolutionary because i am proving art so let's go ahead and throw this into [ __ ] i ran out of space you know what this part wasn't that important we're just gonna cut it gaffs are an inside job to make you buy more video games so for you and the mortal combatants i ask next time you want to test your mind how about you rest your mind this is a pivotal part of the hero's journey when uh the hero's shadow self goes off and eats ice cream warning he is a fart man that's right it's time for north boy redux wow finally meat he is in unimaginable pain and he will dampen your sheets do not attempt to cuddle this skinless meat man also can i be real with you he pees too much [Music] uh and we're just gonna call that the anti-heroes cradle the contents of which will be revealed in kingdom hearts three no [ __ ] all right [ __ ] i have no more space here terry [Applause] [Applause] what [Music] are you happy i want to watch the doom slayer catch a bass talk about a woke bay it's just a horrible phrase i'm sorry for writing it what could be better than that if they farted you don't have to be good at cooking to do this you just have to be good at arson and that's why most chefs are wrong that's a sweet mushroom johnny cage has big divorced dad energy he will take selfies of your cuddling sessions and he will post them with the hashtag second chances that sound good that sounds terrible i just didn't want to include him all right look i don't have to explain everything to you i'm going through my rebellious face how did i say that i don't know hanging bodies from the ceiling that flail around when a character moves through them on the screen there's that classic sony magic so it's like if you were trying to cuddle a gun that constantly needs validation that's just todd bonus points for horny todd and i will come back to you right now that's science baby steer clear of this knife pervert slices dices big old crunchers if i can't be accurate i sure as hell i'm gonna be extra more spectacular more flamboyant more of whatever this is that's just that's just a mush awesome spicy mush and now that you're jazzed and ready to go time to fail that's cooking baby why spend hours of time in therapy confronting your flaws what you could just touch this dog almost enough to keep my mind off the fact that we still had 60 recipes to finish in roughly six hours the desolation of working at a job because we all know the true monster is man and cannibalism is frowned upon in new york molina we'll eat you and eating in bed is a very bad habit sorry rain not all of us can go into ikea and ask for the espavar some of us gotta settle for the horseback you're role-playing a dude who was asleep for a hundred years yeah you can do that with a mustache wow his bowel movements must be pretty whack the data cube is that thing where the hero goes on a journey into his inner thoughts and finds some data that an old guy put in him it's that thing that happens in the hero's journey it's across from the mall raiden is a boring old [ __ ] look at gordon ramsay over here making warm milk chunky chunky but don't let that failure get you down it's time for stage ten you develop an organization to trick young boy into committing heartless genocide in order to create a new pseudo version of that great power you discovered back in stage 3. and then you fail again the most difficult challenge a young man can face feeding himself god i can't speak today or can i the third a cab act all cops are bad at cuddling desperate for love and affection that they cannot receive thanks to their hazardous bonds experience the terror first hand of trying to explain to your uncle that you work in a very niche unstable industry only cuddles upside down hanging from a ceiling and then there's the guana on soulja boys gaming console everyone fully supportive of my great work if you say more than three hearts i'm firing you over 49 megan pixels of screen dissolution 62 gigan boats of ram and 720 thousand first twenty that's over fifteen thousand you can't make me do that legally that's not in my contract right i can't they can't legally make me do that recipes we needed to get through and that leads us to a very important question which of these mortal combatants is best at mortal comfort is like a good cook dunkaroo right here hey bucko i think what you don't understand is basic storytelling basic storytelling i mean compared to what patrick compared to what am i doing this well [Music] what [Music] this is the greatest looking meat i've ever seen in my life but isn't that what we want as gamers to be disappointed i'm just kidding again i'm not your friend and you have no say over what i do with my body yeah wow they really paid for that huh and the fifth and final c can really just go to town on a [ __ ] okay this isn't even cheating it's just doing it wrong they're just doing it completely incorrectly yeah if it makes my pet happier and it makes him less of a weak ass scrub why wouldn't i game the system did that work i don't know ask aladdin did the memo work why don't you ask sebastian the crab [Music] if you have bugs in your house and you make the conscious decision to want those bugs in your house they aren't pests they're pets [Music] yeah now that is milk and meat together it lasts it could easily be used for evil by some of the most wicked forces on earth like health insurance companies [Music] [Applause] is life quantifiable god we all need a distraction sometimes type chunky dog milky dog horny dog no matter what type of fish i put into a dish i'm not gonna get any more ripped i'm just gonna have a different fish in me shinnok is just quan chi in a disney world maleficent hat he lives in my apartment but he doesn't pay rent and he eats my bagels if i leave them unattended he is loud stubborn and not afraid to make terrible decisions in plain view of me and that makes this guy a barbarian okay ask yourself am i holding my pet rat back from their true ambitions the answer is always yeah i'm an eighth long boy someone who's willing to do what needs to be done when the going gets tough or someone who reveals an abyssal dragon that they've been keeping under their armor this whole time this is business yes i know my hair smells great i'm trying to sleep by building a set of pet types after explaining why i needed it my time off request was denied war [Laughter] oh no dangerous territory i watched a video online about how to fillet so i'm just going to put some carrots into some milk with some salt not great lovato owns a trench coat i've been dealing with this small bastards antics for so long this six arm weirdo is going to steal trinkets and treasures just to win your favor look man i've got enough funko pops cyborg more like tryhard [Music] the red bull's wearing off it's a fibrous pumpkin four strong arms to hold you one strong heart to love you that's the name of my new album that might be a transcendent experience and maybe it's just because i went so low two minutes before this point his meow sounds like he's been smoking two packs a day for the past 40 years [Music] beautiful your value is not defined by the size or shape of your body it's about what you do with the body you're given and if you needed me to tell you that i'm glad i told you that that isn't our current and wanting to see your characters grow and thrive and then also to figure out how easy they were to kill that's not bad that's not bad every living creature is one hit point the end what are we cooking now oh something good i hope nope you could wear a ghillie suit people have also done that not only was this terribly boring but i was beginning to fear that zuko was not as strong as i had hoped do something please i don't know if you should own that thing does your zucchini plant produce too many zucchinis aka any amount of zucchinis yummy i don't think i've used the word yummy since i was six other side of the pillow wishes it was as cool as fuji the style points are off the charts i'll tell you from touching it it's hard and i'm ignoring all the other stuff one is the shell left behind after a cicada mulc and the other is a [ __ ] whale the wind that can rip a man's skin away could also be used to ventilate the flame that scorches flesh can warm a soul and the hand that rips out a heart could also cradle that heart with love [Music] welcome to kane's siblings incorporated where we all have a sibling-like bond and do the same job mortal combat there's red bull in this mug ah that dude's wearing a tight-fitting suit with a bunch of weird patches that must be arliquino the servant clown sometimes tattoo master it's kind of like fire emblem doesn't know how to make interesting characters without making them suffer traumatic parental death georges if your name's jenny it could be penny uh if your name's travis it could be starfish you can't have a board without a cord which is my favorite dr seuss book hey kojima you can't just name a dude die hard man i no longer saw him as a freeloader who sometimes throws up in my bed i saw him as a companion who sometimes throws up in my bed arrogance like viki just think they're the best hotheads like caspar want to fight anything that moves and edgelords like niles retweet joker accounts unironically moody sword swingers kind of like if that person who said they studied the blade actually studied the blade my name is the lewd improvisation men how could i be more dangerous [Music] what is danger i have a contact for someone named zayn and in the company it just says bocce ball [Music] who the [ __ ] is this super smash should have included more magic babies that took like 30 minutes surprise i wasn't an old crow and i was a magical witch the whole time waking up one day and coming out to see mads mikkelsen in my kitchen just sweeping up uh some some spilled cheerios and then he he looks up at me and he gives me that aren't i so clumsy smile i love him with all my heart and he loves me just the same yeah okay okay i cannot explain that many characters i have made that mistake before flying horses ladies you condense into one word cheerio any sword wielder who's a little spicy heavenly voice known for tackling complex ideas from delving into the nuances of the human psyche to figuring out how much norman reedus needs to pee and memorable characters like marth that's not marth marth that's which one is marth marth it just tastes like honey oh there's the fish okay you're making the roux for the stews donald will kill goofy by throwing him off a dock riku will start cutting his own banks kyrie will continue to not matter dirty duck hot coldman naked snake these are all precocious little magic babies they are always up in [ __ ] that they should not be up in and they have this nasty habit of getting axed super early on they'll keep dunking on you till you're dead hmm now that does just taste like undercooked dough it may seem challenging but science shouldn't be easy it should be correct that's [ __ ] spot on what kind of setting would allow this mistake of a human to really exhibit his uselessness getting possessed which is a classic mistake just hot raspberries it's not bad yeah oh this is this is incredibly tough and i honestly do not have the time to unpack this [ __ ] impedance impedance is a very good word that's just sweet meat it's the sweet meat that we got right there and so sometimes you just need more meat for the grinder you know screamier dagdar sloof fjorm belf i could go on all day the comedia dell anime ah you know drip let's see all right it's very drippy it's fine it's fine it's carrots and vegetables hey i'm the loot improvisation man if you're wondering how i got this name let me tell you i played lumiere once things didn't go so hot that's how i fell into this mercenary business want your back kid you may hear me say a sexy joke that i'm too naive to understand is sexy what if chess made you horny they might not be your sense of horny but they are horny nonetheless but do not way we could make something that looks like the video game picture for any time you meet a new friend or foe or shadowy government institution it's like trying to remember your co-workers names after meeting them once at a work mixer except in this case your co-workers all have swords and can only make one facial expression puyo and hi i don't 100 know how to feel about how good my friends are at painting sad clowns but i'm glad i gave them an outlet i love what i do and let me tell you something i've worked some days let me tell you i don't know kirby is a metaphor for capitalism he can jump he can dance and he can successfully avoid conviction for war crimes again he pees himself right before having a flirty conversation with his friend terry big mood so what the [ __ ] this pink puffball has been sucking his way through the denizens of dreamland since 1992. here's an archetype i call what the [ __ ] [Music] look at this thing look at this thing is he the keeper of their souls sakurai [ __ ] woke up in a crop circle with the name kirby carved into his arm but kirby is a wheel so that ain't gonna work this can only be accomplished by gifted teens grappling with psychosexual on week how about just me turning around and you've got scissors here what have you got hell yeah a big old whale i can't wait to see ahab level up and hit that big boy right in his weak points and sure he puts his harpoon up in moby d's flanks but spoiler alert ahab gets got even though he's been grinding for like years and pale whale's just a [ __ ] fish with a thing for sailor feet and so you say this to miss mahoney and she's like brian don't you get it the whale is a metaphor for something and then you write that on your final exam and you pass the class if anime is to be believed and i believe anime that waluigi is a serious sneak watch out for his sparky sticker it's possible he's planning to live fast die young and leave a beautiful beautiful corpse and a skeleton wearing a tank top that says i heart my daddy we will make it work ground pounding at age 86 is hard on the hips dirty dirty terry and that makes her the president of vices the vice president a circle survived this survived how it's just a regency era quadrille and skanking and that is no good is it is it i actually i'm a little confused now whoopsie what the [ __ ] fire emblem for the entire time i was drawing this i wasn't interrogating the true nature of kirby pepe informational good catchy pickup loot traditional in your face punk kicks energetic educational sticks in your head pick it out your cousin ben's wedding right there society spicy slap's heart pick it up propaganda arbor day pick it up [ __ ] you philip glass pick it up i'll wear the same shoes pick it up pick it up pick it up pick it up pick it up pick it up pick it up i literally have no clue how this dumb [ __ ] orb can have so much power can wreck shot the rest of his life was typical mirror standing dying of starvation even if sakurai was too [ __ ] zooted to remember it because how else are you gonna support your [ __ ] fail son's bad business ideas [Music] there's nothing here as we move on to the party [Music] did i just make ska again and then in trial five i peed myself a lot it's like what the [ __ ] fire emblem you didn't have to do him dirty like that this killed death disappear gone from this plane of existence kirby came from nothing and kirby is nothing or is he everything i'm also smart sometimes qualified which is a rare condition in this of my walls let alone all six rooms a barely living kickball but is there more to him according to official canonical information no i don't need any paper i lied i'm sorry for using so much paper what if i'm never gonna die then you're never gonna be able to retire and that feels pretty right for a strangely smooth-skinned mustachioed man with neither the ambition nor the intelligence to make decisions and yet the world bends to his will does this sound like an apex predator how can this sentient garbage bag accomplish so much

Channel: June Kwon

Views: 48,753

Rating: 4.9863687 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: OhPkAHgQMIc

Length: 51min 41sec (3101 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 30 2020