Podcast #153 - Honest Company Slogans Pt. 2

ding-ding-ding thinking back to the genital podcast singing in lap thank you guys yeah you no wonder for so long yeah it's [ __ ] up pointing at me right people really tweeting at me after the whole jacksFilms things they were like here is a [ __ ] crazy person only a self-absorbed maniac names and like a dog after themselves and I was like no no no no no and that I use with you have his work good effort though he imagines like me naming my dog Maury her me name are dark Julianne no so Lomita premier Julianne dream tweet to e6 I would like to have a son but you name like Julian the second Julius both look junior I I think that's weird I mean not weird I just I could never ever in a million years see myself even thinking of doing that is that so like a popular thing happens I know people whose fathers are their same names man yes still yeah I mean I'm not I'm not hating on it I just I could never I could never be in that mind frame of like I'm so deeply invested in leaving a legacy that I'm literally renaming my son the same name I have like I don't seems kind of wild seems a little weird seems a little weird just Oh mad about it now doesn't used to be a weird thing where'd you get that bit I'm a little of glass of wine you know nice having a big old mug of GF beer right here this [ __ ] cartoonishly big thing it's a big mug big mug well we have a nice little part to for you this this week can you guess what Cherie now you're you're like beard rubbing up against is that beard a long oh you did not that's the sound of my beard don't be nasty said rolled on one of the podcasts is don't be nasty no on a resume is be nasty ol be nasty mmm-hmm to two liters I'm going to finish that whole beer by the end of this podcast that is a certified guarantee Tennessee I don't you can go to gingerly pause calm and Keynes you what what what what happened blackout no are we talking okay what are we doing doing alright we're doing um part two of honest company slogans yeah any sponsors hood yeah we got some sponsors are you Lana oh okay okay Jenna so eager and again to these sponsor she's like she's like petrified where the segue is gonna come from on the heels of last week well when is that segue coming well come Julie oh come on it's Lee oh come okay it's gonna come in hot blazing hot don't want it - oh it's coming in hot what is it not Cheetos its flaming hot here later not tuna I feel like so it should make sleeves and hot cheetos blaze and they spell cheetos with zeros instead of oh so they don't get trouble with copyright okay ch3 3 t 0s blazin blazin I'm sorry about that so basically what we do here is we before we sat down here we came up individually with about 15 or so maybe you have more than me companies or brands and we wrote honest slogans so if the slogans weren't made for marketing purposes that they were made based on like real life and actual feedback of customers aka us this is what the slogans for these companies would be we tried make them funny although I don't think mine are very funny okay but we can discuss and see if we agree and you guys should have a good time of it yes it's fun I don't on the front I need my phone and I don't have it he's not good boy here is it you know what you know you don't need it I need it why well so for later I needed but whatever no first one okay all right are you going first I wanted to go first all right see this table is all like tip your mic is like perfectly like this and mine is just straight into my face no boy okay another week okay I'm complaining about ourselves alright mounds are you ready yeah who looks lucky to mouth this is the lady's candy forever which I got great selling almond joy and took out one element from it mount who was it who was it watch this we were not on that's funny that's funny because mounds of you think about it is just a shape it's just a shape it's a mess like maybe a candy bar and calling it whole oh I like like why can't eat that anymore they have milk chocolate on them but like I used to language enough it's just coca and chocolate good it's really good but like everybody seems to prefer almond joy because there's like a little crunch in there a little texture a little bit lighten it I like mouths better but really no one eats them yeah a shockingly low number of people eat my own everybody doing we're not backing this up with any actual information yeah I was never been cake candy bar guy growing up candy bar boy what was your preferred cam I love Halloween and you got candy what were you like yes I was a kid I love Kit Kats that's a candy bar yeah yeah I wasn't a big candy bar boy that means I didn't have a lot of candy bars that I ate there was a few one was Katz the other was crunch all kids are like that no no no I was different I'm different than my favorite candy bar I can't claim to not be a candy bar boy while having a favorite kid are like most kids take a I'm a different type of kid mm-hmm okay so just leave me out of it okay we will do it okay talk I gotta get a good one to start with why because I was good man just give us what you got get postmates come outside please we're 20 minutes away I was bitter rightly propose that I didn't but it was like text to you we don't have it did you send them a picture wait yes we do that's literally half of our post Nate's exchanges oh I can't find it and then you send the picture order you say please ask for help and then they're like okay I found it yeah you want something else or would you like to cancer or like Madonna no no no no like I feel like we leave such because a lot of the stuff that we post me if it's firmly a grocery store is it some pretty hard to find sometimes like gluten for your vegan stuff it's not like super easy like someone wouldn't know it and let's hear familiar with those foods so I always like write a description about where to find it like what I listen like you know that kind of thing and like describe what it is like oh it's a vegan meat substitute that looks like ground beef it's in a baggie to the natural food section of the freezer like then they get very like they don't have it like [ __ ] text me a picture of the frozen food aisle and I'm like is right there you saw this but not really I ordered recently I ordered beyond beef it's like a plant-based like ground beef substitute and it comes to this like red bag and I ordered it and they text back here I'll then have it and I literally before I order the post Nate I called that store I was like do you have this specific item narrowed yes we do so that's why we post night so I was like could you maybe ask for help like I just confirmed on the phone that they had and he was like yeah they said they don't have it I was like could you maybe send me a picture of what they do have and he sends me a picture and in the corner of the picture that's it it's like in the picture he literally send me a picture with the item in it saying dude right there oh so clips solutely I bet you wish you were sunburned and you had a mean friend because this ain't going to be a five-star I give everybody five star unless they did something like blatantly wrong I give like 95% of people five stars if they're just an hour and a half or two hours when I know it doesn't take that long from like what were you doing with my time all right I go and you ready there we go feet like the bug spray deep mm-hmm what what do you say deep do I want some teeth you ever goes camping I was like here spread your legs with deep you're like wait what what I realize was deep why would you call rock deep I don't understand that name I've never actually heard I've never actually heard of it being called deep not bug spray but deep because no DEET feet yeah exactly feet feet with the teeth I actually have heard of that but I've never heard of anyone used that as the name of the product hey you want some CIL hours if it bugs friend some default deep what deep deep deep it's just like a conversation confuse er mm-hmm deep what that's so slow give you real market we have to roll is our world market to vision yes by better world market we have chairs and snacks but don't [ __ ] sit in the chairs or taste of snacks really you can't sit in the chair no I'm gonna yell it like five times yeah yeah they're all so comfortable to sing or they're on display you're not supposed to touch up and then there's like a whole aisle of snacks I have taken notes from Costco gift some snacks for free make little stand with checkered tablecloth muscle feel welcome make you feel like summer I have world market yo we low-key also a liquor store they're like five different stores hmm like liquor stores they're like candle and and candle stores player dad furniture and then food that's about it for Amazon are you sure you don't also want this Oh brutal so [ __ ] real though every time you buy something it's like customers also bought and went off [ __ ] I like that and it's always really like that well want that and the thing is is like you know especially if you're a Prime membership you're looking at a Prime membership hold it right here ah please you're like I get free like a new day sometimes one day shipping okay I get free shipping on this package might as well throw on a little add-on that's diddly just just oh thank you just spank a little bit oh my god that is a wine glass marbles I'm touching the mic anyway that's it okay do you want me to go you know I want to finish talking about spanking items into the cart mm mm so the carts are here okay you know it's about a jet off in your house 24-hour up here like lightning fast you just get on in there join the club okay there's going to be nice big bubble of plastic that protects you from careless mailmen throwing the Box around you're safe in here you're going to see Julian what Dad somewhere else in there Sam ago Amazon so you start please tell them okay I'll tell you I smell it exclamation point ever said pound sign hey Astrid okay it was on and then the commercial was like Amazon not to be confused like when when you say something sassy or you're like no you did it like this then that's a different that's like very different that's like TTT k this is recomendation betrayed his tongue and the top of the mouth yeah and then this one is like girl no you did I've never heard the cracking sound from that girl in that girl situation that's the thing that's but not to be confused because Amazon is the only one that has Amazon please imagine someone touch that Amina hey what if we are tagged on it is literally just as [ __ ] really annoying noise Amazon would you like to be up what's going on with you we're recording wait when he growls will you do a voice again yeah yeah I wanted to return it no you check there Amy check out how they're made noise another phone even your own your phone oh okay you don't get to just do it so it sounds terrifying I'm terrified of my platform we're good all right are you ready for my next one yeah Marvel you ready to shut up sorry got out of line I'm sorry hi I'm shy Coppertone sunscreen yeah we got kiddie porn on our bottle for years since like 1975 our bottles in Chinese everybody that's a that's a kid but we got a baby blot on here maybe us aren't any porn that's why pizza Jill took a good peaceful kid but what okay debate time comics if I bring up a looking but personally I feel Oh Fox out yeah yeah personally I think if you're the parents thank you but it's your kid yeah you're changing the diapers this kid but but on a bottle of not your kid what kid but is this come get your kid but it's not your nails runner or a child that you're caring for or like your friend your neighbor or someone this is like maybe barely connected to you yeah I think are just thinking generally like your little neighbor's running around with the kid busts out they've got run around the sprinklers and [ __ ] that's fine how are you kid what I got a do something it's when you're advertising a kid but I feel like it's not that - totally - but mmm all right today we got a high of 95 there's going to be some kid but running around the street make sure you turn on your sprinklers for the kid but they're going to be running around their bathing suits and the Coppertone I used to see you through my bathing suit in those into the street I will stand over the sprinkler having like go up in my visit and pee down I was like hell yeah [ __ ] with me you know every like Valentine's Day I try to find words and I can express why I love you I think you just summed it up in one sentence what when I was a kid I peed through my bathing suits in the sprinkler into the spring better yeah yeah but you ever have set up a sprinkler and then you just go sort of like sit on it straddle it no like not even that like oh you did everything you in your you're like legs and body because everywhere around it's just like something that kids do you feel like it's like stepping on it with your body yeah and then um yeah I feel like oh this is a great time just to pee real quick I used to pee in the lake because everyone thinks I'm a me too but everyone thinks I'm just sitting on the sprinkler but now I'm just I'm over here tinkling a good forget Mo's this is the worst part though is P bits are flying every bit T this like like pee little bits of tea your are flying everywhere around you it's like you're being surrounded by a force field of pee well it's good for your skin like I said in one of the podcast before it's like getting really Mershon of all oh my god do not call me a wonderful person does not call me away in like high end foot cream and stuff urea is like usually one of the top three ingredients which is just [ __ ] urine basically and like I was on a diving team and you we would wear flip-flops in the shower and stuff obviously because you're in by the pool because you'll get planters worth like all over the bottom of your feet if you get in the shower and pee on your feet you will never get like planners or scrum walking around pool like that so real thing you know and it's not cuz you nasty it's because you just in that water where it just is what it it's good I just thought a situation where someone's he's on his friends foot because you get stung you by something like a like a jellyfish doesn't really wake that little what no it's just like a lot of thought of someone being on a friend's foot I would say word I'd be on I hope you'll need me to I think you'd be way too excited to pee on me as well oh whoa okay oh man recording y'all not an outfit is my impression of Julian if a jellyfish stung me and he deemed it worthy of peeing on it I got this played out laid out laid out well you're welcome I'm just trying to help okay I don't want you to have an infected sting in your leg somebody's well but your nipping Lisa Oh nip it in the bud all weekend all right well you get aa face book got you that's one view do the thing where you made a circle if you think like you're going to punch me yeah because if you glance at over one second is a view oh my god choco kyun like that got you this one view I counted it as to it I told that advertisers it's one view scroll through your feet see it one beer oh my god and you wonder why views or someone plated on Facebook history well I hear like 50 50 from people they're like nah do those views are legit and like yeah but I know a lot of a Martin legit because I'm the person scrolling through Facebook sometimes where you see they just start playing there's no sound and I know it counted as a view yeah I'm scrolling past it I went back and there was literally one more video and then I went back together there was one I'd like to use our legit but they're not watching it yeah yes somebody who saw it they'd be using this anyway someone views it as a glance at everyone I can easily regret and then get plot yeah I think we needed a more clear definition of view yeah okay all right I have adidas Originals all the cool Street where you want not available anywhere near you here have some athletic wear sleeve oh god what happened it didn't really such cool like Street wear it like half of my favorite clothes are all of their like street wear you know I don't know what happened to that store because there was one couple years ago I'm in Melbourne yeah it's a Melrose store in near Hollywood and we went there a couple years ago eighty-five for us to get in there like a trip to go there yeah but like years ago they a like and in this this was like right when the adidas hype train was kind of you know getting going the tutu is starting to having Easy's we're just beginning and [ __ ] but you could find so many cool items there shoes you got so many cool jumpsuit like the shirts too short the hats the jacket everything they were sucking dove and it was the only place you get it was like the adidas Originals store and now we go and it's like the [ __ ] the the [ __ ] clearance aisle it's like no one wants this [ __ ] so we're just putting in the store it's ridiculous it sucks man it really went from like good to bad well especially since the when we went to Japan yeah one time which I wish was all the time no mazing but we went we made it a point to go that Adidas store in Japan yes they had like an enormous selection of the street where it's like they ensure that we don't carry any more well yes or never half or you can only find online or never find online there looks like at least the Japanese Adidas store understands like that's a big part of what people want yes they have a huge selection like what makes you think the American people don't want this [ __ ] adidas treat wear please give it to us what the [ __ ] dad well I think Japanese 3 wear has been ahead of the curve for a long time and even just Japanese like a pair like sports apparel like remember when I told you I was dying for that titanium catcher's mask yeah I learned about Mikey JP which is the Japan website for Nike and they had it like like anyone to Japan and could just buy it and this is something that was nowhere think about Italian Greyhound closed that [ __ ] store where you bought me those turtle rice permit for a TIG works I do not know if they like our selling to America or not at this point but it's like as far as I could tell is one designer like the most incredible impeccable amazing clothes for Italian Greyhounds specifically like turn on items are certainly only sold in Japan Julianne like jump through hoops and [ __ ] are you know back and forth with them this is when I first started dating you and I was like I need a cake to knock this out of the park but that fashion like [ __ ] me up please sell in America please we walk whole stuff yeah please give us your Italian Greyhound clothes yeah and like the [ __ ] he has is soft - it's like incredible material yeah but it's not quite micro little fabric because if it was Michael brother fabric it would be sold right any of these and it is not okay me and these is just for you guys and you know speaking of me and these you guys can go Jane calm right now if I'm the best pair of underwear in the world number sign and but okay so Jesus so every month they have new designs it alternate feel good on these for when you want to feel naked cannot be naked think about that you feel naked but you are not naked it's appropriate but it feels in a perfect that's me I use for you micro model fabric is three times softer than cotton I personally have a drawer in my closet currently and happily overflowing with manatees because they send you a pair every month or you can just go buy one pair it's really awesome okay this sustainably sourced micro model fabric okay and like I said the new designs everyone they have a [ __ ] pair of underwear with pizza on it okay what more do you want if they in a purchase soft other work with PETA auto play right now wait hold on the designs that you get you can also buy and then so if you have a significant order you guys can wear MAGIX is the same on D it's been abused I have another problem also cook you mentioned a minute I think the underwear looks a lot a lot better on your button it doesn't mine that's just my opinion also I'm not a person who stares in the mirror of my own buttons there's damn that looks good no it's dinner I think my butt getting big I think my bucket big we got getting hot in here so take up earlier boy you sit up Julian guys right now me and ease up soda by the way agnya days is one of the og Jenna Julian podcast sponsors and their family to FAA even recently sponsored a Twitter stream and we're going to be doing more with them on Twitch support them they are great people and an amazing product owner you have to tell you more guys right now they're offering you 20% off your first pair and free shipping when you go to meet undies comm / Jimmy Julian that's em e undies comm / Jenner Julian's start wearing the best underwear of your life and look [ __ ] goddamn good doing it goddamn good oh you don't okay did you mess with the focus and you've got alone with hey what are you doing right now we're probably out of foam it's fine hey Mikey what what time's it [ __ ] I can't tell cuz I on my movement watch god yeah yeah high-quality minimalist product in a movement watch it doesn't break the bank okay as you're looking at watches in department sources I know I do you walk through departments or children is watch on tape maybe I'll try this on you neglecting the price tag you finally end up doing it it's $500 you don't have to kind of catch that who would spend on kind of a watch it's stupid movement watch has the classic minimalist quality designs for you at affordable prices okay they've sold over 1 million watches in 160 countries mine is actually another room show the [ __ ] rabbit here it's it's really really [ __ ] nice piece kind with a white black on black she is black like I have a white face and a brown band and it's so nice to the board it's like every wedding I've been to and it's light it's light is like doesn't wait on your wrist it doesn't make you all like uncomfortable and sweaty and it dresses up whatever you're wearing like it is such a quality and cool-looking design for someone who's like loved like accessories and like trying to find cool menswear and the accessory aisle for a long time movement has been incredible because it's affordable and it looks like it's not affordable you know basically right now guys you can step up your watch and get 15% off and free shipping with free returns they're going to nvm t.com /jj that's nvm t.com /jj get that nice discount look through their calendar watches you will not be disappointed I promise okay I was just thinking about this wasn't have anything to do with movement Watchers but I was thinking about something that looks nice at an affordable price and they made me think about the Super Deluxe that I showed you tabasco sweet hahahaha we're watching his channel he's basically theories called cheese curls so he basically takes like you know whatever it's a DIY Channel for making knock-off designer what I love about it walking amazed i favorite part about it is it mocks like the height beast culture yeah like supreme and like cheese bells only really dumb [ __ ] that people spend money on says the guy was a supreme hat I didn't buy it was a gift but it's very funny like he recreated a Gucci belt with the red and the like alright next next step my family dude it's only funny be here hey go line his name Tabasco sweet revenge of essence yeah but with a kt8 bees s yeah he's very ki kind of just a natural volume yeah it's not though I don't know anything about Super Deluxe what they post you know stuff every it feels like a BuzzFeed is it my turn your turn I have one to go with my last one go ahead adidas by Rita Ora I thought of Rita Ora was a french fry or some [ __ ] I'm just kidding that's not mine that is one of my favorite tweets of all time that I read many years ago that made me [ __ ] laugh for probably six years I don't know JK Rita Ora barely works she just cute for a living did you write that oh the tea is hot today when I said come for real though like this is no shade to read or I think she's fine I like I like her voice I like when she makes music but it does feel a lot like every once in a while should sprinkle a song your way and then you're like alright I guess we'll uh we'll just see you around we'll see you around but like that's that's about it is that shape um it's tricky no no no just a little bit darker in here that's a little bit I got I have nothing to do if I'm wrong no because I'm not a baby Robert is compared to tender boy I don't know who what Reed or doesn't doesn't do sorry I love you but I don't have no impossible I don't maybe she does look cute for a living it's not that that's the joke is that like I feel like you see tabloid pictures of her and stuff like going around and hanging out people and like doing stuff but then creatures outside shell sprinkle a song at you it's never like an album and then she'll like so she see me at places and be an award show she's playing this game it's like how I did in school eat in a bottle where I'm right you do the minimum amount of work then you're at the right place at the right time and you're you're great dude yeah I read or as I see yeah not shade but like we don't have for your compliment like she knows what the [ __ ] is it with acting on effort read or barely works but she's you for a living and also you're calling her cute this is not shade this is the income and I did like some of her read or adidas Originals I didn't is my changing men's work cuz I'm waiting for read or to come out with menswear line up french fries Rita or Oh better for the masculine of aura should I leave well Travis think Rogers that was a snake whoa shale gas some of our locations have normal price gas some yo shade yeah I don't really pay where do we go - L see I only know that it cuz I grew up in an area where like near Santa Monica there was this one [ __ ] Shell gas station then had like a dollar on top of every other guy or nerve the nerve right but then you go out of town in the shell normal and you're like wait why I don't get it why is one of them for the convenience of the location oh but I know exactly what you're saying cause I lives in Santa Monica I know exactly the gas station you're talking about because you drive past like two or three six and well sure that's shell right you're talking I don't know but you drive past like two or three and you're like alright those are the same and then that one you're like what the [ __ ] when I stop there good you got some air you know someone Oh her what else you got boy alright I got a wet Seal oh wow this is she oh she it fell apart that's T no it's not it is your your officers murder it's not T because if you buy your shirt for like four dollars it's okay that puzzles are true then you can like repurpose it as like a kitchen hacks but that was like you know when I was in college and you're buying stuff like alright it was a top like even a nice top you can wear out is like $12 it's okay if I spill my beer all over this and like my friend rips it while we're dancing because I spent spent $12 on if you get like a lot of wear out of it that was like a really good deal certainly me but if something happens to it like it's not a bad thing yeah I bought up a 12 and that's an expensive one you buy $7 shirt there $4 shirt there high end over there yeah no they get more expensive than that but still yeah it's like it is disposable clothes almost yeah I understand that I kind of feel like it's some pieces of hmmm her like that yeah like cute oh my gosh every dollar it falls apart zambian oil yeah and like free go then you spend like you know then you get like nitro for your birthday or whatever like you got me a nice shirt of everything and I've taken really good care of those shorts because I like they're nice and I love but it's already like spilled juice with pulp but I on like a nation I'm sure everything $10 I work a couple times maybe I'll wear it with stating our children is this right here is wife belongings cause suffering because if you have nice things then all you do is think about those things and ruining those things and what would you do something happened to those nice things so the solution is to not have nice things or really a lot of things at all so you don't get attached to them at all if everything's fine I am a Middle East I don't have any belongings it's supposed to be like this I am a minimalist I have no belonging good for you good all right ready for mime yeah I got one we go along sort of with my last one though that I think you'll appreciate don't snap your notebooks brah Amazon Chevron we really tried but we couldn't get the rights to carve the movie I never seen cars a movie at that though no they're whole [ __ ] thing is like cars with eyes and like talking cars but it's like a shitty ripoff with cards already I guess I've never seen that Chevron was tech on your nursing those Aspen oh wow [ __ ] me right okay well I had forever 21 more like forever shrinking the men's section into a tinier and tinier corner and toes what are we gone they deleted amends session I don't know forever 21 yeah that's I kill one no the time is anymore well okay you mean that I understand but like in terms of clothes that will fit you and that you can wear it's like every time Julian goes up the escalator he's just like well [ __ ] why did I think it used to be a whole like half of the upper Phelan school and then they cornered it to is one corner and then they turn that corner into like a unisex like there's not even Enzo anymore yes feels like just headbands and accessory doesn't prettier than jewelry and you're like whatever dude [ __ ] me whatever dude checked it I'll just get my underwear it means I like forever tell you yeah I did I used to then they forgot about me people I guess that's what you got going on the next page hmm damn subway eat fresh or eat here yo you're a shady day yeah i'ma say today okay sorry talk about it surprised even I ate me like I hated subway I'm so sorry subway because I know there I have plenty of friends that prefer that they like they love subway same reason people prefer like McDonald's burger to like a high end hamburger it's like the processed foods have that like addictive taste yet no I get it but like it was never for me yeah it's almost ironic that their slogan is heat rash that way eat fish yeah anyway isn't there a YouTube video that I think you look up if you haven't for like how the process like they don't even cut the the Peter cheese like in the house it's sent to them like rice old and I stand like nasty it's pretty gross it's very good it is okay if you put your hand over the grass and touched me it would be cleaner than if you didn't you nasty alright I got American spirit cigarettes I'm in only smoke when I drink kind of person Bluff let her there and sad for you but if you think these things are gluten free I always paying way too much for my coffee I never lose arguments because I literally refuse valid points I'm actually rather annoying I have an add-on to that why don't I sell these are hopeless I've resorted you will say American spirits are like healthy cigarettes like pure and like natural I mean there's only a couple people to me when I see them smoking American spirits I'm like yeah you're still a cool person like I [ __ ] you because I know the person who shall be my elder that's when people say the things that it's not it's like it's it's just too much sometimes when other people are just like those people that are like they work out non-stop and definitely close pictures of their brown rice on the Instagram saying [ __ ] fit meals the [ __ ] okay you just have a vendetta with brown rice not start I'm talking about like it's a the people a bit like work out a bunch to just walk over to Pinkberry and then they're like big orange I'm like large with extra marshmallows yes but then they're the ones to tell you that it was frozen yogurt and you know it's like some [ __ ] hip I can't we just have no calories yeah it's like I can't believe I'm talking a cigarette but it's like it's not even a real so it's better for you I know it's like the cop-out cigarette it's like people who drink diet talk diet coke and are really convinced that it's better for you okay still drinking a cold beverage with like better literal [ __ ] chemicals in it better but also at the same time horribly worse well it's better which way do you wanna die that's an American spirit it's gonna not make you diver bad baby but you know that's another thing that we don't even own a car yeah like American spirit might have less chemicals than it was like American spirit which way you wanted I passed this wagon right there I'm very constricted which way you wanna die oh that's [ __ ] up alone and talking to myself like an [ __ ] goddamn American spirit okay I'm just kidding sort of not good um my turn good Archaea you can't pronounce it or build it whoa like you pronounce like he is oh yeah the only thing I can pronounce at IKEA are one two three this season snippy chops off to Nyssa dancing and if you have a disease or smelly's in your house I love you I want to come sit on those misses and smoothies otherwise our literal names of furniture from Ikea yeah their chairs and uh but you know it's like a secret code II might have is my best friend you know it's caught it they didn't really this is only get a tattoo someday Jenna might not leave and you can do what you want your body boy all right greenies actual crack for dark yep actual like I think the dogs are addicted to greenie they behave differently with the Greenies out than they do anytime with anything it's crazy that you know I feel like you should adopt that slogan because it's going to targeting y'all upset they can't read but you are like now you can gather the info you're like oh I didn't crack for dog doing okay we did it yeah I don't you kids are going to attend good I'm not in the most literal person like in a Petco be like I'm looking for a pipe for my greenies they're crack for dog you see the psychic-type a very literal de a dog owner comes in pairs wait correctamundo mm I got more than you oh yeah I got a couple I only have a few left Michael Kors what's up with all these poopy pants that's white a literal Michael Kors nice I like it uh supreme you guys are dumb give us your money yes oh my god people are dumb give us your money I gotta go Kim Kardashian beauty kylie need a lot of money so i figured i could probably make more but I won't Oh mommy or maybe Donnie and I want those catty Lucas okay branding on ya Kylie Sawyer I mean I've heard mixed reviews about Kim Kardashian's beauty I have not tried it and you know it took me like forever to get Kylie lip kit I got that kind of [ __ ] it took me forever I actually my only ones that I have were like gifts from people that gave me because there are records now you've won yeah and now you finally have the Kylie lip kit enjoy girl um but I have heard some pretty mixed things about the Kim Kardashian beauty but she's already rolling out like more [ __ ] looks like now I'll even rated an Irish model for them to do this is that what I know Littleton nothing about makeup you know that but what I can appreciate about tighly and the way she's marketed her lips is we're not here to talk [ __ ] about hi I'm literally just praising her oh praise it I what I can appreciate is that she's clearly made a product that stands apart from the rest in its genre right it's a lip kit but it's not just oh look it's a kind of looked like you hear that name it has a buzz to it and it's been created by this branding that she started with I mean at least from what I see this is someone speaking on the outs of the makeup or like I don't know [ __ ] about makeup but what I've seen it's like these are the easy to make up no pun intended I know they're in the same [ __ ] family or whatever but she gets over snapchat and she [ __ ] shows every single thing and I'm like oh this is interesting right I can see what all these things look like now it's interesting I think it's i think props yeah I mean a lot of people do that in the beauty community thank you darling I see what you're right maybe I'm wrong maybe I'm literally speaking out my ass all right I got one more in the wing the light ears so that we can even these eggs I get a kind of a demon voice real quick come our demon voice yeah okay one second there you go quick you just Mayo so we are going to [ __ ] destroy you oh my god okay can we give a little background here cuz that made no sense to anyone is one of my like favorite conspiracy theories ever and it came up to be true yeah it was like I think at first saw only toy or moments or something it was like there's a wild conspiracy theory going around to see the egg industry like as a whole was trying to destroy the male brand just mail which is a vegan mayonnaise brand gradually no eggs well yeah they don't have any eggs - so dairy um and like these egg executives were like trying to take them down yeah because one of the main ways that they've made a lot of money was by having eggs and Minnie's like as an ingredient I had an another way on the mayonnaise market use where eggs did you do that yes there is what your color source of like we can make money from yeah and then I guess apparently I don't remember exactly I went down but like the emails came like maybe really were like actively sabotaging this one minis brand we're not letting a man hiding in [ __ ] right [ __ ] up crazy eggs we see you just mail and we are going to [ __ ] destroy the supporter look on my favorite those Labor's favorite because it sounded so ridiculous yeah alright my last one after that before I just tell them what Jared came in Turkey this boy eat and Jared boy and he's melted she's ah DHL this package isn't from the United States it's just like international packages a bit yes something funny paralyzed to be funny a FedEx ding-dong-ditch how many times you had a FedEx package two on the way and you're waiting waiting in the nearly go E and it's just in my place they go get a sip of water you come back and there's a note on your door and you're like how the [ __ ] did they get that there yeah yeah it wouldn't be easier to just deliver it you have to come back yeah you would think all right I got a Buick plus we keep definitely trying to rebrand please just buy our card if you can figure out what logo we have now with Furillo they have reread it so many times that Trader Joe's Hawaiian shirts are dope if you wear them all day every day oh here you I feel like a better slogan for trader Joseph's we got a lot of snacks not a lot of other [ __ ] you look yeah that's way better definitely way better uh Invisalign invisible braces except for all these invisible braces we done cemented TT do you know how [ __ ] InDesign work so you know how they market it at this as it's like clear retainer that you just like pop in your honor and then they give you know they literally they call the buttons I'm sorry but they're just round clear braces that they put on different teeth in your mouth animate unlikely and generous conversation I only thought our business well and then they stay healthy so then you put the retainer and it clicks into the buttons that actually move your teeth so you basically have braised the care is almost the same except of this ridiculous level of oral care that needs to happen because if you put your clear retainer in and there's any like food or anything in your mouth like it'll just you know cause a cavity because something is pressed up against your teeth and gums you know what I'm saying so you can only drink water with them in anytime else you have to pop them out to eat or drink anything other than water anything other than water then after that you have to brush your teeth wash your teeth and then put your Invisalign braces back in it click into your buttons but my mind is sufficiently blown right now I always thought that this worm is just a little mouthpiece that's why your fault it's because that's how they market it to you smart is like their clear retainers no deception look like youtubers they're people like here's me roasted Invisalign I went from my consultation and they showed me these clear braces I was going to help and all of a sudden they were like oh good we go submissive but sunny mouth and I was like what buttons and then they said like the buttons and now these are my buttons and they smile and their shoes look literal dots on my teeth yeah that's crazy did not know that yeah they don't tell you that [ __ ] and they get you in there and then they [ __ ] rope you in with these clear braces just getting you that clear braces on top of your teeth what how did you eat the buttons ah nasty meaning is it any of all the good ones I have ever come with Chipotle every worker has their own personality and opinion on your serving size oh that's so true though you ever have someone that just gives way too much of something that you don't want no they always give me not in a price always I'll like obviously I'm not eating the sour cream but if someone's like add like some sour cream I've seen them just slop that until there's a white bowl of slop I don't like girl I get nasty in that ratio we thought we thought you ought to do that give you like this much carbs like these a little scooper it gives you a tiny little bit of protein while you're paying extra for guac yeah natty ice nobody buys us with a real ID next okay good cause beer cause beer so chill claire's this is Stacey she's 19 it's her first day she's gonna pierce your ears for you sweetheart don't get the gun oh [ __ ] Real Talk though when I got my first holes in my ears like you know I was like a kid I think it was like six or seven and I went to like the Claire's look in the mall and she drew the markers on and she did the gun or whatever and I remember her being pretty young and I remember going home and looking my Arabi like this was done did it crooked I imagine this price so like they're still a little crooked some like so common éclairs a happy they're all so yummy it pierced my cartilage with a gun damn it you coordinated on Carmen how that [ __ ] piercing gun here no but you know what's worse Sally Beauty just straight-up sells the gun [ __ ] I plated itself a to go back yeah daya oh you vegan how'd you like to be a junk food week yeah yeah you have some creative ways got some mac and cheese what up you want a pizza I would love some talking they are so good so [ __ ] good it's so bad it's so good it's in a good way though like it's so amazing but like you really do not yeah you want to eat junk food all the time it's not junk but if you eat enough if it's alright Lucroy we really nailed it in on coconut that's just nasty we're sorry coconuts go back coconut Lacroix is not if you like coconut right and you were my friend and that is a closet attack don't text me although I did drink it one time with my friend with alcohol in it it was sort of like a you know again tropical yeah and it wasn't the worst part so dreams like by itself is real nasty it's wrong Terron it's just wrong it's like they asked their employees to come up with flavors and someone just [ __ ] up their deadline and was like [ __ ] coconut him only time I've ever heard of coconut carbonated drink is in the office when the warehouse workers win the water you know and they go invest in all Japanese energy drink that coconut penis flavored energy drink and then do only if you going off their chest up I'm pretty good to take your time guys Britta here have a passive-aggressive argument with your roommate about drinking out of it not filling it up oh my god that is so [ __ ] true that is like I remember like six things about college and that's one of them like that it's so [ __ ] funny that's really good mmm Abbi no lol y'all think Jennifer Anderson puts this [ __ ] on every base oh my god it's not [ __ ] I'm sure it's a very good product but we all in our hearts of hearts we know Jennifer Anderson not over here washing her face with a V no you know what I'm saying burner phone out Justin Theroux is Julius is like an extreme justin theroux Fionn no Jennifer Anderson has some person with a diamond on a motorized stick scraping off her skin cells every single day like she's not washing your face true skin goes off with a veto she's not she's not going to CVS and stocking up on oatmeal [ __ ] lotion she's sucking up on people with diamonds on their heads to scrape her face this she's just learning some diamond [ __ ] lotion let's be straight up all right rainforest cafe mediocre food with mediocre entertainment for you mediocre evening beauty is your face I love the attack at the end oh you Nathan media of your family good for real though like I know people love the rainforest cafe and understand like it's nostalgic it's fun it's whatever but all like be be objective okay all of it is mediocre it's like look out for something it's mediocre your meals mediocre it's not even that entertaining okay look you guys retain its mediocre unless you're like before and with this case it's [ __ ] magical but if you're a dolt come on all right Charmian we've literally sent Big Daddy and a family of them ran a person like yourself I know on harm first of all why are the Bears red I'm not sure either way I just looked it up this is the extra Tecton Charmin with a letter C charming commercial Big Daddy is the third that's a subway plan roll the tape I gotta get to do we can't stay here jerilyn favorite oh never get clean way ahead of you Big Daddy what I want to first understand wider read I also get to pick doing entertainment baby people to this video no understood like we want that on the Sun so many vid Network apps that we buy like what his salary yeah y'all need I mean they play the same [ __ ] ads so we see these ads a hundred times and so we started to recognize them and like we're number of equates she just call him Big Daddy and like she taught you I like it shouldn't know she's your her like what is happening here and they're red uh I mean okay well and her whole suitcase is filled up with one case of totally but you brought nothing on your vacation except toilet paper did you see the moment when she pulls it out the suitcase is empty after that yeah it absolute sociopath it's true speaking of terrible commercials on the shows that we watch though this if you if you look up Genaro Canelo right he's a boxer yeah Canelo Alvarez here just look up like be folder to turkey Picatta commercial disc alone no good copy nothing against Canelo nothing is Sloane but these commercials are some of the worst I have ever tried in subway I just want to play the audio just listen to this you have to look it up and laugh yourself hey oh boy you know [Music] people there okay okay no [ __ ] clue with that what anything just was so cringe they're so good and grim on every single good mercial break it's okay it's cringe right but it makes no sense like the acting is cringe but I have no [ __ ] clue what they're trying to tell me like what's the story here what's the joke what's anything okay I don't get it it's Tecate and then you just really speak and I've never heard Canelo Ebola ever but that's fine but like he I basically walked up he's in the boxing gym right he's [ __ ] swinging it at me and then and then he's like it's so lone out of nowhere walks into his boxing gym like in a private closed practice and he's like be bold like if that happened like get the [ __ ] out of here I'm practicing I'm [ __ ] don't like to be fair I feel like we have a high tolerance of athletes when they take commercial gay children be funny no no like you can suck in world Kayla oh god I actually like that's fine Arriva they're in a movie like when LeBron James was in trainwreck that Amy Schumer movie they're like he's fantastic like he's a lot of personalities being funny that's the exception for like if you're bad we're like that's fine we don't care fight to you here's one it's not it's not that like he's bad hitting man and anything good canal would have been great it's like the idea and the direction behind that commercial makes no sense he endings of Canelo I feel like if there was anything with substance behind that commercial it would have been really it wasn't great but but that that and of itself is whatever you are Sylvester Stallone like yeah he's not the best actor in the world but he is an actor an expensive one can he be he can't even make this good boy I think the bottom line here is that my commercial blows ass and I don't know what they were even going for like it what's their best-case scenario Big Daddy Simon not Big Daddy yeah he did way back 30 80 here you go Big Daddy family at least he doesn't just [ __ ] surprise that at least he doesn't just shake hands and say big older women the commercials over and you're left with like I have no [ __ ] closure I don't even know what happened I don't know wider they're hugging I don't know why there was a steak involved why does he have a black eye what's the backstory I don't know if it's like everybody sitting in it in a tub of ice and he's like canelo be bold and then he looks over he's sitting in a tub of ice and all of these beers just pop up from the inside of the night without any loss at first thought it looks like boners it looks like ya don't this is the sound of me cringing oh he clenches hisses cringing at that - anyways very more of it I'm done with mine I'm done with mine - I'm almost done with my wine eyeball there he bowed their knee about that I told you I was going to potentially do dinner so I'd like to say shout out to me for keeping my promise what are you going I'm just people there this is fun I I found it as finely as enjoyed this one do you have any other one yeah no no dude did you guys yeah they're not responding yeah can they hear us it's like a live audience all the time well you don't come thank you guys for hanging out for another episode this was uh this was fun I appreciate it he thought that'd be both you know bottom line here ok Beebo they're on their feet Oh LP a I you're ever in the motel Marshall just like you you'll never do worse than that one it's like Voltaire but ball bear yeah sure see Bob that I thank you guys for hanging out appreciate you guys and as you gain ten we'll see you next Monday I'll take [ __ ] i doing yeah oh sorry [Music]

Channel: Jenna Julien

Views: 1,547,454

Rating: 4.9214029 out of 5

Keywords: trick people good looking boyfriend girlfriend, julien and jenna, julien solomita, jenna mourey, mourey, jenna, marbles, how to, trick people, good looking, the face, face, vlog, jenna and julien podcast, jennulien, jenna marbles podcast, jenna podcast, youtuber, tutorial, kermit the dog, kermit

Id: vXaBaExFr3Q

Length: 59min 4sec (3544 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 21 2017