Mother in law crashed the honeymoon

[Music] last time i posted about cruise control's wedding shenanigans dh and i had lied to cruise control about everything so that she wouldn't sink her claws into our wedding we called our reception upon voyage party and claimed it was to celebrate with everyone before we had our honeymoon well after we'd fake eloped we both consider that party to be our wedding and cruise control didn't think it was important enough to show up so we didn't have to deal with her cruise control was mortified when she found out that we would be camping on a honeymoon for the record we didn't camp the entire time it was maybe 60 40 camping and hotel rooms still she begged us to consider taking a cruise or staying at a resort instead there was only one suggestion she made that we liked the sound of dhs aren't not an actual aunt but an old family friend who was like a second mom to him had moved to beach town and taken over a small hotel that had been in her extended family for a long time as a wedding gift to us she would give us a free stay in one of her rooms i'd also get to meet a person who had been important in dh's childhood he would get to reconnect and it was not at all out of the way on our trip it happened to be a good halfway point between two places we planned to see dh called this lady who i'll call aunt i remember sitting next to him so i know this exchange happened he said that he would really appreciate it if aunt didn't share what days we were staying with cruise control because he was pretty sure that she would try to crash our honeymoon she said oh honey i know exactly how your mommy's don't worry aunt had been the voice of reason when dh was a kid he told me supposedly she had a way of getting her to back off and calm down he spent many an afternoon at her house to escape cruise control looking over his shoulder while he did homework she sounded like his guardian angel we showed up on our stop at the little hotel and we had dinner with aunt dh enjoyed reconnecting with her and she seemed lovely to me we told her about our plans for the rest of the trip and what we were most excited to see the next day we went down for breakfast and cruise control was at the buffet she acted excited to see us and asked us to sit down with her we both had total wtf looks on our faces and just stood there finally dh choked out mom why are you here and she said it was a fun surprise for us because she knew we hadn't had much family involvement with our wedding wtf she skipped our reception so she wanted to show her support for ann upshores it didn't make sense at all it was crazy talk she said that she knew we were sad and needed her to cheer us up yikes we told her i know this is our honeymoon and we want it to be private you should have called so we could tell you no she said that surprises cheer people up so it needed to be a surprise we just gave up and said we had plans to snorkel she is terrified of snorkeling and left without getting our complimentary breakfast cola open bracket i sat across from the h at a crappy breakfast place and looked for different hotel rooms on the internet it was summer and this place was popular so everything was steep or it was a smoking room we decided that we would stay at the hotel at night and leave all day for our remaining two days there cruise control sleeps in pretty late when she can and she claims she can't stand for long periods of time so we were betting on her waiting for us in the lobby we'd take a side exit and leave early in the morning we spent all day out and got an amazing dinner afterwards and then we went to our room and locked the door the old hotel had thin walls and we could hear the door of the room next to ours open and close and then we heard a knock on the door and cruise control saying hey i love us we didn't answer the door and she gave up and went back to her room after knocking a few more times she said i guess you guys are tired see you at breakfast i remember telling the h i'm sorry but i can't have s with you right now this is too creepy he said nope understood yep same we heard talking and laughing through the wall later it was cruise control hanging out with aunt in her room we woke up at five o'clock and quickly packed up our cameras and everything else we needed for the day we ended up driving to another beach and getting some nice sunrise photos after that we relaxed set up some hammocks and read books for a couple of hours we swam a bit and just did our best to enjoy the day without needing to return to the hotel we went back sometime past 10 this was our third and final night so it was cruise control's last chance to see us she was very angry that we had avoided her she knocked on the door and yelled at us to open it i fantasized a bit about opening the door and making eye contact with her as i placed the do not disturb placard on the dork knob but it was already there at this point we hadn't seen or spoken to aunt since dinner on night one and we weren't sure if she had accidentally let it slip or if she had conspired with cruise control dh was adamant that she wouldn't do that to him aunt joined cruise control at the door and said kids open up let's all talk about this together d h was so sure that aunt would come to the rescue that he opened the door they both rushed in before he could change his mind and what ensued was a ducking mess they both said we were impolite for sneaking around we should be grateful for the hospitality and my personal favorite we are such entitled millennials and there's something wrong with our entire generation they had planned and rehearsed a dressing down like we were naughty kids who needed to be lectured things went back and forth for a while before before i said it's late please let us sleep aunt said we had better not sneak out because we needed to check out in person she said we could resume talking tomorrow and that she was so disappointed in us dh cried that night he was out done though cruise control cried even louder so that we could hear her through the wall it was eleven thousand one hundred percent on purpose i meant to have this up sooner i typed the entire thing out and then the internet just ate it it never posted i was so frustrated that i gave up for a while this might not sound like much but for dh and me its progress we left town for the weekend and we didn't spend weeks preparing cruise control emotionally for our departure we got to make spontaneous plans spontaneity ducky air in the last post i made we'd just been chewed out by cruise control and dhs aren't not biological just a term of endearment that she no longer deserves we were just horrible for doing things our own way during our honeymoon d h cried after it was over because aunt had been a normal maternal figure until that moment aunt told us we'd better check out in person the next morning instead of sneaking out i felt so wary of the situation that i packed all of ash except what we needed for the morning and i snuck it out to our car in the wee hours of the morning morning came and we were at the moment our alarms went off we couldn't wait to get out of there we needed to leave early regardless because we had reservations that afternoon in our next destination we argued over whether to turn the key in at the desk or leave it in our room dh felt that aunt would punish us for leaving by slapping us with a lost key fee i said fine it's worth it she will do her best to ruin our entire day and i'm excited about horseback riding i'll pay whatever fee she wants we settled on handing the key over without saying a word and leaving it's not like she has the power to detain guests we overestimated our spines aunt got mad when we turned to leave and said aren't you going to say goodbye to your mother cruise control likes to sleep in and we couldn't afford to wait for her and why would we want to d h said we don't have the time aunt said paraphrased but i do remember some choice parts verbatim wow unbelievable you were always such a good kid and now you won't make time for your family you are so utterly selfish it takes my breath away d.h how is it selfish to want your honeymoon to yourself aunt how selfish is it to want two honeymoons dh this is our one and only honeymoon you know that and we spoke about it over the phone you made a promise to me because you know how my mommy's i can't help but feel betrayed by what you did aunt i'm sure your mother feels the same way me dh let's go this is not worth our time ducking [ __ ] beyond dh you're going to learn a lot in the next years what's worth your time and what isn't very pointed glare at me mark my words dh and i both left in disgust after that this interaction helped us both realize the value of the mantra don't engage the drive to our next destination was quiet and sad dh was upset over how art behaved he'd told me so many times about how she was a willing shield against his mom's neurotic nonsense four years he would do homework at her house because cruise control would interfere with his homework if she caught him working on it he'd go over just to get a break from her and aunt would greet him with his favorite cookies she defended him against cruise control when she was being particularly insane a commenter suggested that aunt might have been an fm reporting back to cruise control the entire time it would explain why cruise control was so willing to let dh go to her house i haven't mentioned this theory to him yet because i don't want to pick at old wounds but i'm very curious what his take on it would be we got to our destination and we set up camp did a quick hike went to the visitor center and tried to forget the morning and day before we drove to the horseback riding place and parked we got out and we literally heard cruise control before we saw her remember how we'd excitedly told aunt about our plans before we knew that she joined the dark side yeah cruise control was pleading with an employee to be allowed on our trail ride the bewildered employee is trying to explain that horses are a finite resource and that he can't come to one out of thin air i found another employee and told him the situation that's my mill this is our honeymoon she crashed she was not invited i want her gone if there are any no shows please don't give her the empty spot i will ducking pay you whatever you want i'll pay for each no show and give you all a nice tip he shared a quick story about his own mill to show me that he understands how it is he called over the poor beleaguered employee who was still being subjected to sobs whales and flying flecks of spittle as he explained that that would not be putting two riders on one horse i don't know what they did but by the time we started the ride she was gone there weren't any no shows and everyone got a big tip from me when we drove back towards the campsite we saw cruise control parked by the beginning of the road that looped through all of the campsites we guessed that she was going to wait for us to drive by so she could follow us which is uhhh terrifying dh made a three-point turn and we discussed what to do i finally walked to the little ranger station for the rangers who watch over the campsites and told him that there was a car partially blocking the beginning of the road and i was pretty sure that it wasn't a camper he went over and asked cruz control if she had a camping permit this was enough to scare her off she drove away and we didn't see any more of her at all the rest of the trip was completely uneventful especially after we turned off our phones aunt only reached out once after that she sent the shittiest christmas card imaginable it was just a regular christmas card that people send out to everyone but she attached a giant sticky note to ours i don't remember exactly what it said but it went something like this christmas is a great time of year to reflect on our priorities i hope that your first year of marriage will grant you the wisdom you need to recommit yourself to family don't let anyone tell you that everything ceases to matter just because someone is keeping your bed warm at night i'm telling you it was extremely nasty and basically made me out to be nothing but a warm hole we decided to cleanse that particular evil with fire i got the best revenge i could think of with dh's blessing i wrote a really long and heartfelt letter back i told aunt about how i'd been excited to meet her and how dh was devastated and questioning a lot of his happy childhood memories i'll let her know that she had irreparably damaged her relationship with him and that i was sorry to see that she never replied i don't think we'll ever hear from her again that's the end of the wedding and honeymoon nonsense when we got home cruise control pretended that the whole thing never happened she did try to force herself onto our anniversary on the wrong date so who cares and she once stole wedding photos off of the wall of our home [Music] [Music] you

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Keywords: reddit mil, reddit mother in law, reddit wedding, reddit girl, reddit, reddit marriage, mother in law, crazy mother in law, r/ mil, r/ girl, r/ wedding, r/ pregnancy, r/, r/askreddit, askreddit, askreddit mil, mil, askreddit pregnant, askreddit girl, reddit honeymoon, honeymoon

Id: qmbF1Sel4Vo

Length: 14min 23sec (863 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 19 2020