Boyfriend wants me to cut off contact with his brother because he defended me in an argument

[Music] boyfriend and i have been together for two years i have known his brother who i will call her for most of that time we have always gotten on well enough the whole situation started with my 21st birthday party we had a party at home with 20 or so friends of family i was of course present at the party along with a few other members of bf's family the party was going reasonably well as it started to get later i started to get a little tipsy and most of the guests had started to go home it eventually got down to a drunken little group made up of myself boyfriend r and a couple of my girlfriends we were sitting outside and one of my girlfriends decided to get on the trampoline she managed to execute a pretty cool flip and i expressed that i wished i knew how to do one my friend talked me into giving it a try i got up on the [ __ ] stumbled drunkenly and fell down laughing everyone else except for bf was laughing also it didn't seem like much of an event until bf got up muttered ducking pathetic in an angry tone and then told me that we needed to speak in private i was pretty confused as to what was going on so i asked him why he answered me with just stop being a stupid cow for a second and come to the bedroom both of my friends and i looked pretty shocked at this but i before i followed bf to the bedroom i told them it was fun and bf was probably just messing around he can have a real temper sometimes particularly after a few drinks but i didn't think that would be the case in this instance as literally nothing upsetting had happened cut to me and bf in the bedroom he shuts the door and starts really going off he tells me that i'm a disgusting drunk idiot and that i was showing off like some kind of pathetic one abe by messing around on the trampoline that i was an embarrassment to him and that i was to go to bed now and not leave the room until morning so that i would be more of an idiot in front of company as this is going on he is getting louder and louder and is slamming things around the room i went to leave as i was quite upset at this point but he blocks the door so i sit down on the bed r is banging on the door and tells bf to open in bf goes out into the hall and i can hear he and are arguing next thing i know it r comes into the room and says to go with him i was sobbing like crazy at this point because i hate confrontation in general so i just nod and go with him r makes sure my other friends have left and then we both get into a taxi i don't know where bf has gone but he is still in the house so where i'm crying a bunch in the car and don't say much but our courses and bf's mother and gives her a brief rundown of what happened we got to ask place he lives with a couple and they were all really nice the girl rumored lend me some stuff to sleep in and our told me to take his bed and he would sleep on the couch i was kind of all over the place but eventually got some sleep next morning i got up and had coffee with r and one of his roommates r asked if bf had behaved that way before and i'll let him know about bs temper but explained that he had never blown up over something as insignificant as me mucking around on a trampoline i asked her if he thought maybe i did or said something that might have upset bf and didn't realize due to being tipsy but i said no and that bf's behavior was unacceptable i felt silly and embarrassed especially knowing that r and my friends had heard everything bf had said and i told r i had better get home and try to sort things out i said that he wanted to stay at his place for just a bit longer to calm down and that he would really rather prefer that i didn't go home straight away as bf could still be angry i gave in and hung out there with our and his roommates we all just played video games and got some to keep it and i ended up feeling much better afterward so i'm glad i stayed early evening i told r i should really go home i didn't have any of my clothes and more importantly i needed my stuff for university the next day he drove me over but didn't really want me to go inside i told him it would really be fine and promised i would call him if anything happened he agreed but said he would wait outside for a few minutes just in case i got inside and bf wasn't home so i told r to go and went about tidying up from the party bf eventually rocked up and seemed calm enough i told him i thought we needed to have a talk and he agreed we sat down on the couch and i explained to him that i didn't think the way he spoke to me last night and asked for an explanation his response was i will discuss that with you after you delete our phone number you won't be speaking to him again i was confused as all hell at this and asked what that had to do with the matter at hand he told me that i disrespected him by interfering in our relationship and that we were cutting ties with him he told me he wouldn't discuss anything else about the night before until i did that i told bf i thought that was pretty unnecessary and that i had been trying to help me because bf was acting really threatening and that i would have probably done the same in our shoes well bf did not like that he yelled called me some names and left the house after a few hours he sent me a text i'm sorry for yelling but you need to respect what i want if you want the same in return this can't be one-sided delete ours number and we will finish the conversation love you i replied that i needed a little time to think and said i would be sleeping in the spare room when he got home and to please leave me some for a while i went to bed heard bf coming very late he opened the door to the spare room and turned the light on but as i woke up he just walked out of the room and slammed the door so this morning i've woken up bf is at work and i have a text from r it says hey i hope you're okay look what bf did the other night is really not all right and i think you should get out of there for a while i've talked to and and it's totally fine for you to crash here until you figure out what you want to do so that leaves me where i'm now don't know what to do about the situation do as bf asks and cut contact with our or take ours offer of some space away from bf to clear my head my worry is that if i stay at ours it will destroy any chance of fixing things with bf advice very much appreciated edit after r texted me i replied to him asking if he had known my bf to behave like this with other girls in the past over the course of many texts it came out that he often yelled at and belittled his previous girlfriend in front of others and some of his friends and family had suspicions about how far he was taking it after the breakup the girlfriend posted some stuff on facebook about how bf had hit her said awful things to her and did other things like spying on her and deleting people from her phone behind her back initially when this happened our and his parents questioned bf but he insisted that the physical or accusations were not true and that his ex was saying those things to cover up the fact that she had allegedly cheated on him bf admitted to yelling at her but he told his family that she did the same and just as often his family eventually accepted that but our and his parents were always wary of bf's behavior and are in particular had made a point to keep an eye on things bf6 apparently had also called r around six months after myself and bf had gotten together and asked him to help me if anything happened at the time i was not quite ready to believe bf would physically hear anyone but he told her all the same that he would watch out for me or any other girl in the future r told me that after the way he saw bf behave at my party he became more convinced that bf was likely to get physical and that was why he chose to step in he also told me that even if it didn't go that far i should not put up with how bf treated me i agreed what i had told me and all the information and support i received here had me pretty convinced that i was not in a good situation i decided to go and stay with our and his roommates for a short time i don't have too many other options for accommodation this urgently my parents live too far away and the few friends i could stay with are other girls with enough on their plate and i didn't want to risk bringing this drama to their doorsteps in retrospect i'm glad i chose to go to ours because i feel like what followed could have been even more frightening and dangerous if only myself and another girl had been present i didn't have much time to get my stuff together before bf was due to arrive home so i packed a few bags of essentials and valuables along with my school things and i picked me up i left a note at the house for bf i was leaving and that i did not plan on returning other than to retrieve the rest of my things i didn't tell him where i would be staying and that i would rather he didn't contact me directly suggesting he communicate through his mother instead i got to ours and got settled in while choosing to leave was difficult and i had a few bouts of crying i also felt immensely relieved ah bf's parents came around and brought some dinner they were incredibly nice about everything and told me i had to do what was best for me we always got along well but i never expected them to be so kind and supportive given the situation halfway through dinner my phone rang it was bf i did not want to answer it and everyone else agreed that was probably a good idea after my phone rang out our slash bfs mama's phone began to ring predictably enough it was bf calling his dad answered the phone the phone was not on speaker but bf was loud enough that you could hear him yelling down the phone i couldn't tell exactly what was said but his dad was telling him to calm down and not to do something bf hung up on him and our bf's dad told us bf was coming to our's place and saying this was all ours fault i started to get a bunch of text messages from bf making threads and telling r that he knew i was there and ha was coming to get me i replied to him saying that if bf came here and caused trouble he would be calling the police but bf ignored him bf showed up at us probably 15 minutes later he drove up the lawn and almost hit the litter box and got out of his car and started yelling r and his dad went out while i stayed in the front room with his mum bf yelled for a while and was kicking at random parts of the garden bf started to yell towards the house that he knew i was there and to come out i wasn't planning on coming out at all and i told him to leave bf ended up running around the side of the house to the back patio entry the screen door was locked but the solid back door wasn't and he started hitting the fly while trying to break it he kept yelling into the house that he knew i was there and that if i didn't come out he would destroy all my stuff and log on to my school accounts and cause problems on there our and his dad caught up to bf and started pulling him away from the door bf started throwing punches and his mum and i both went out to the inside of the back door because we were worried someone would get hurt bf saw me and started trying for the back door again and saying if i didn't get in the car he would k himself his mum said she was going to call the police bf our's dad ended up hauling him out to the front yard and told him to leave bf did eventually get into the car he spun his wheels and tore up the grass and drove off i felt pretty awful after all that his mum and dad were both visibly really upset and ours rental property had been messed up and i felt responsible they were still so nice about everything though they really are wonderful people i spoke to the police and they said they would be speaking to bf about what happened and i got some advice about obtaining a vro and making sure i could find a way of retrieving my stuff from the house so that is all okay for the moment the latest news is that bf has been all over facebook saying that uh and i had been having an affair and posting all these random cropped blurry p pictures from the internet saying it was us and that he had caught us in the act none of us are responding to any of it at this point haven't really decided what to do there my plan is to stay with r4 now it's still my best option and r has said he won't leave me alone at the house in case bf comes back either he or his mail rumored would be there we also spoke to a couple of the neighbors that are as friendly with and they said they would keep an eye out for his car or call us if they saw anything dodgy i'm at a bit of a loss as to what to do next i'm planning to talk to my uni about getting into student housing i'm planning to go out tomorrow to buy some pepper spray also i'm tossing up about reaching out to bf6 but i'm not sure if that will cause more problems for everyone so i suppose that's it for now at least i'm sorry that this was a bit of a novel but i know a lot of people wanted an update and considering how nice everyone has been i wouldn't want anyone to worry that i had gone backslash stayed with him rest assured that is totally out of the question the more i think about things that happened within our relationship with this new perspective the more i realize how ducked up some of those things were [Music] [Music] you

Channel: Reddit Girl

Views: 16,141

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Keywords: reddit girl, reddit drama, reddit boyfriend, reddit, r/askreddit, r/ girl, r/ drama, r/ boyfriend, r/, askreddit girl, askreddit drama, askreddit boyfriend, askreddit

Id: JC2A4P0qjNY

Length: 14min 23sec (863 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 11 2020