Mother in law blames our dog for us not wanting to have kids

[Music] today my mill was over and as always she started to talk about children we are married for eight years now but we don't have children because we don't want them and mill has a hard time to wrap her head around it she started to wail that we are going to be too old soon we are both 30 and i kind of feel like she thinks our dog has the fault in it i think she sees our dog as some kind of a hindrance that prevents us from having children because sometimes she says something like if you didn't have the dog you could have children more safely or so weird that you care so much about an animal but don't even think about having your own child our german shepherd is 14 years old now of course my husband and me we realize that his life is coming to an end and it's really hard because he has been my dog since i was a teenager and my husband has come to love him even more he's like a child to us and it's very difficult to say goodbye he doesn't have any terminal illnesses though and the vet said that as long as he's still eating drinking and walking we don't have to think about putting him down yet so this time mill got upset because we asked her to close this topic once and for all whether or not we have children is none of her business and we are definitely not going to have them just because she wants us to she went out of the living room and to the foyer to get her jacket that was hanging there on the rack between the living room and the fire there's this short hallway and our dog was walking there i went out of the living room just in time to see mill snarling get out of the way you dirty mutt as she kicked him on the side the dog staggered aside surprised as he has never been hit before even when he was a puppy and was doing all kinds of mischief we never ever physically punished him and this bee wasn't gonna either so i was like wtf are you doing why would you kick the dog mill said well why is he getting in my way moving like a snail i don't have time to stand here forever yes mill the dog is slow it's because he's old and doesn't have the energy anymore to run around all the time so move your a around him honestly she could have easily walked past him the hallway is wide enough but no she probably hoped that no one will see her taking her frustration about us not having children out on the dog i told her that the dog lives in this house and she doesn't and she doesn't have any rights to treat our pet like that the dog doesn't have any fault in anything if we wanted to have children we would have them regardless of owning a dog he is not an obstacle and i told her that if she ever does something like that again i will rip her head off my husband didn't see mill kicking the dog but he heard the noise and came to see what's going on and i told him that his mother attacked our dog first he couldn't believe it and then he blazed in fury he was 100 on my side and he told her to leave our house and never come back he said she'll never step over the doorstep of our house because a dog deserves a peaceful remaining time of his life and she's a danger to him to be honest i was pleasantly surprised i knew he puts me above his mother but i never thought he has that much of a spine mill was starting to say something but my husband dragged her into the foyer he didn't even let her get dressed he threw her jacket and her boots out the door by the way it had rained shortly before and the jacket landed in a puddle and told her to never contact us again and if we ever decide to have children she'll never see them mill was offended beyond words she was like all because of one dirty shedding unsanitary piece of hair you'll both regret it our dog is fine in case you're wondering my husband insisted that we go to the vet to make sure mill didn't cause some internal damage but everything is okay as much as it can be in his age my husband blocked mill's phone and it looks like he's very serious about going nc with her so am i i will never understand cruelty towards animals me 26 female and my husband 32 male been married for three years and my mother-in-law is her entitled bee she is a literal living nightmare i've made it clear since day one that i had no interest playing her stupid games so i tried to stay away from her for as long as i could and god it's been difficult for me to ignore her nasty comments and her manipulative attitude towards me she obviously don't like me and can't accept the fact that her son chose me to be his partner my husband is a leo he's a good man with a good heart unlike his toxic mother who tried to stick her nose in our business for a very long time she's done a number of awful awful things for instance one point when i met her she came up with a new name for me cause she simply didn't like my name two points she accidentally ripped my wedding dress one week before the wedding so we had to get another in a very short time three point constantly asked if we were trying for a kid and said that we should let her know beforehand wtf four point suggested adoption for us more times than i can remember saying how wonderful it is to give a good life for a kid neither her nor anyone in the family was an adoptive parent my response was sure i definitely consider but husband and i really want kids on our own she didn't like that at all five point whenever i get sick or go see a doctor she'd say well i hope it won't be a happy surprise you know how much i hate surprises she meant that i better not surprise her and tell her i was pregnant two weeks ago i told my husband that i was pregnant he was so happy and excited he told me he wanted to tell his family i told him maybe we should wait for some time but he couldn't contain himself he went to mother-in-law's house to give her the news when she heard her face turned red asked him why he hadn't told her earlier husband thought nothing if it being the man with good intentions here he slapped him in the face like he was 12 years old and told him how dare you lie to me and keep me in the dark all this time long time then told my husband that god must be angry with him for him to end up with having a baby with someone like me she was going nuts over the fact that and according to her her son will forever be attached to me with this baby she told him she felt betrayed and kicked him out of her house and told him to not come back till things are back to how she wanted them to be she meant me getting rid of the baby i remember my husband went straight to his shift after leaving her house he did not sound okay on the phone and it sounded as if he was crying or something i didn't know what his mom said that day but he sort of just broke down and told me everything he was feeling hurt his mom was upset with the news and didn't want anything to do with the baby even indirectly suggest today he probably expected a different reaction from her though her awful behavior has been there the whole time he just couldn't see it she ruined it for him instead of being happy for him to become a dad she downright squashed it and made him feel bad i have three daughters 14 and two seven-year-olds twins my husband is an only child and my sister has two girls seven months ago i found out i was pregnant again both my husband and i were happy if a little shocked i was on the pill so a few months later we went along to the first scan checking it wasn't twins again twins run in our family i'm a twin and my father was one luckily it wasn't however we learned that the baby was going to be a boy we were both very excited as this was the first baby boy in our family eventually we told our extended family just no mill being the first we'd told now we'd had some problems in the past tried to force us to change my kids names grumbled about them all being girls so when we told her she was ecstatic she even threw a baby shower for me something we'd never done with our three girls when my oldest asked her why she'd thrown it she rolled her eyes and told her that it's a boy so it's the most important baby i was horrified she said the same to my seven-year-olds and they ran to me crying that they didn't want the brother anymore just no mill didn't bother to apologize to anyone stating that boys are better and there is a reason we only had one child my husband hasn't spoken to her since although she sends baby products such as fancy cribs and prams i explained to her that we already had things from when the girls were younger and she dismissed it by saying boys deserve the best before i was pregnant just no mill sent my girls some money every month varying from twenty dollars to one hundred dollars every time the girls were overly grateful and they've saved it in a bank account for when they rolled her but since we've told her about our son she has stopped sending this money instead setting up a bank account in her name dedicating it to our son now we are not upset that she stopped sending the money we were always confused on why she did it but we are upset that the reason for her stopping the money is that we are having a son my husband and i are very confused on what to do with her as she's blatantly cutting out my daughters to accommodate my son edit i've spoken to my husband and we've agreed to go no contact until after the baby is born my oldest is upset but we've explained why we've done it and she's been mature enough to understand thank you for the advice and kind words so a couple of days ago i posted on here telling you about how my just no mill prefers my son to my three daughters we spoke with my girls and we all agreed that it was just better to not speak to just no mill yesterday i went food shopping something i knew my girls hated so i allowed them to stay home my oldest is 14 and knows how to stay safe so long as she looked after the twins i didn't mind so i go shopping and i do take quite a while because we haven't been shopping for a little while after i've got everything i go home and i see just no mills car parked away up the street i didn't think this was out of the ordinary since she has a couple of equally witchy friends living in our street until i reach my house my dog is outside something i told the girls to not do we have only just got him and he is scared of the cars on our busy street this is when i started to get suspicious my just know mill does not like dogs or any kind of animal really so i go inside and she is sitting on the couch with my oldest daughter sitting silently and my twins crying in a corner i ask her what she's doing there and she tells me with the most smug smile on her face that she's teaching the girls that they need to make room for the baby as he's a superior i was absolutely furious both at the fact that she was in my house and second that she'd poison the minds of my little girls they're seven and fourteen i screamed at her to get out and she saunted out with that same smug smile and i was fuming my oldest told me that she'd let herself in and when she'd asked why she was here she told the girls that my husband had sent her to teach them about how they were worth less than my girls i had to comfort them again telling them that they were exactly equal and i loved them a lot when my husband got home we arranged for our locks to be changed and a motion sensor to be installed is there anything else we can do to stop just no mill from doing this we've texted just know mill and emma old her saying that she is not welcome on our property at any time we've contacted the police telling about her emotionally to my girls we've bought a nest camera for our front and back garden we've had to buy a new lock for our gate so our dog can't get through we've bought a tracker to install in his collar so we know where he is we've contacted the hospital to tell them that just no mill will not be anywhere near us for the birth of my son we've invested in therapy for my girls so that they know that we are not replacing them with the new baby they're just no mill or mrs as they know her now is wrong about the sun being superior i'm stressed my husband is stressed my oldest is scared my twins are upset it's all over the place and we don't know what to do we've applied for a restraining order nearly all of this costs money and we just need to hope to pray that that is the only thing that comes our way we can't afford to buy more things to keep just normal away from our family we can't afford to have another baby and keep our family away from her it's scary and i'm scared we don't know what's going to come at us next i 25 female gave birth to my twins boy and girl four years ago and another boy two years ago my husband 26 and i moved out of his mother's house before my second son was born after months of me begging him to move my mill and i have a rocky relationship when i first started dating her son we had a good relationship we would go out together with a few other relatives every month for a girl's day out it was fun and she was supportive of my relationship with her son when we got engaged her true colors started to show she tried to take control of the wedding planning even though i had asked her multiple times not to she ripped my wedding dress on purpose two weeks before the wedding because she didn't like the dress and we had to reschedule the wedding since she didn't want it on her cat's birthday which she had given away a year before and clearly didn't like i didn't say anything and throughout the entire wedding preparation i was constantly berated by my mill because my parents were paying for the large venue she made me feel bad and eventually i decided to pay for the venue myself despite my parents and fiance insisting they'd pay fast forward a year i'm pregnant with my twins and my mill is hoping for a girl no big deal right well two weeks ago mill was over and was cooking with my daughter i didn't mind since my daughter was being supervised and my mill is a good cook but my son twin wanted to help cook my mill said that he wasn't allowed to and that it was a woman's job my son asked her what she meant and she said his job as a man was to work to provide for his family and that his wife was meant to look after the kids i was pee and immediately took my twins upstairs i confronted my mill and she said she was planning to teach my daughter her job as woman since she found out the gender of the twins i was disgusted to say the least if my daughter wants to be a housewife when she gets older that's fine but i don't want her grandmother shoving into her head that she has to do that and it's a job as a woman she told me over and over again that it's my daughter's job and that if i won't do my job as a woman which in her words is to back quote give birth and look after the children that she'll make sure my daughter does she then told me that i'm a horrible parent woman that i didn't deserve her son that the only thing that i've done right is give birth to her grandchildren and that she'd have my husband divorce me and get full custody of the kids i kicked her out and told her never to come back again as she wasn't welcomed my husband is conflicted and told me we should have discussed me kicking mill out when he came home from work my husband came home and took the twins to preschool when he came back home i asked him if we could talk about what had happened he said he believed what i said happened he was very quiet throughout the whole conversation i told him i didn't agree with her views and that i didn't want her around any of the kids i then proceeded to tell him pretty much everything she's done he asked me why i hadn't told him sooner and i told him i wanted to avoid all the drama i asked him if he thought it was alright what she said we talked about other things involving his mother as well he shook his head i then told him if he wanted to go talk to his mother about this he could but he shook his head again i was confused until he said i've already spoken to her he explained she wouldn't change her views nor would she apologize to me so he told her he no longer wanted to have contact with her i was relieved when he said that he didn't have a temper with me at all but i still had to recommend anger management classes he was kind of i fee about it so before he could agree or disagree i instead just recommended therapy which was part of the plan he agreed and he also agreed to marriage counseling his mill did try to contact me a few minutes ago but i blocked her number i would like to thank everyone for the advice my husband and i are working together to get back in a good place [Music] so [Music] [Music] you

Channel: Ask Girl

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Keywords: reddit girl, reddit mil, reddit mother in law, reddit just no mil, justnomil, reddit pregnant, reddit pregnancy, reddit, r/askreddit, r/ girl, r/ mil, r/ mother in law, r/ just no mil, r/ pregnant, r/ pregnancy, r/, askreddit girl, askreddit mil, askreddit mother in law, askreddit just no mil, askreddit pregnant, askreddit pregnancy

Id: FdF83jRsXXw

Length: 18min 2sec (1082 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 29 2020