Listen to me. Look at me RIGHT NOW. Pay VERY close attention. I am speaking directly to you. My name is Markiplier, but this is important. This game... is disgusting. It is absolutely- 100%- gross. BECAUSE it is 100% absolutely about poop-- but not just poop. Poop in every shape, form, methodology, physiology- like, every way that you could think about poop, I believe that this game has it in it. I have not even played this game. I've only seen the trailer. And the ONLY REASON that I'm playing it-- --is because it looked goddamn hilarious. And yes, there are going to be poop jokes, but i'm warning you ahead of time because I AM TRYING TO PREPARE YOU!! Even now, you're rolling your eyes, going "okay, mark, all right, whatever, oh whatever-" N O ! LISTEN. This game... ...is going to take a lot of fortitude, it's going to take a lot of investment, and if you are not PREPARED FOR THIS RIGHT NOW-- please leave. Just go, go on your day, because what you're looking at on those screens are not legs. Those are butt cheeks. And I'm about to press a button... ...that's probably going to change my life forever. *sploosh* ohhhhh.... i warned you. I warned you, so if you're sticking with me, you're sticking with me through the WHOLE THING. You don't walk away, halfway through because "oH, nO i'M gRoSsEd OuT nOw". No, you leave NOW or you leave NEVER. You are IN THIS WITH ME, or you're without ME. And if you're with me, you need to show it. SHOW ME your dedication. Hit that dingdong like button Because if- I'm telling you there's gonna be people that are just gonna be like "ah whatever I did- gross, I'm outta here", no. you're with me, and you're here for the long-term. And if you're with me, show me. By smashing that like button. Drop a deuce on that sweet like button, and let's do this. Oh... If i have to suffer through this it's good to know that you guys are brave enough to suffer through this with me. I'm sorry birdie-- *uncontrollable laughter* Oh god the jiggles-! I'm just a floating ass oh i'm upside down now. I am literally just a floating butt Move, no i can't move i can't even move, ah.. Oh, boy Oh what did I do? I don't even know what I did! Now why is it a shotgun?! Ok.. what am I doing Okay, whoa hey, well i think i may have found a way? You know never mind i don't like it as much as i thought i might what, oh, oh? We didn't even start We were just at the menu.. We have "Temporal Leakage", "Voyage on Septic Seas" "Things That Go Dump in the Night", "Shits of the Father," "Only the Penetrated man Shall Pass"? What is that? "Incorporeal Asscension," "A Love That Grew in Night Soil," "The Longest Deuce.." I want to go with "Things That Go Dump in the Night" cuz that sounds nice and terrifying, and I feel like I don't know, maybe... Did i do it..? Oh, wait enter to go back, space to begin, okay, whatever. [reading] Experimental food source 'Gribble's' seem to have developed some sort of hierarchy. They are interested in the main subject for unknown reasons. A scouting party is inbound. Just how smart are these foodstuffs? What? okay, here we go this reminds, me of the great poop mountain in uh, Conker's bad fur day Fueh day Conker's bad fur day, sorry i was just trying to not throw up. And the thing about this is, if you go check out the trailer for this game you would actually be incredibly impressed. 'Cause the trailer for this game is quite impressive. And i don't know, what i'm looking at Oh, what the heck? Wh- what are you? [voice] Cm'on! We're almost there! [different voice] We're gonna get us out lickety split. (indisinct whispering overlapped by 'Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies') Balthus, will lead us to liberty his plan cannot fail I see it the gateway i smell gas in the air What what am I what am I am I a poop goblin? What, am I the foodstuff, Gribble's? What is going on? This is so weird whoa(x4), hey, whoa, whoa, oh, my, god oh, my, god(x6) Hate it(x3) [Distant moaning] Hate it so much UUUUGGGHHH! WHAT,THE FFFFFFFFFLYING FUCK WAS THAT!? that that, was the scariest thing I've ever seen in any game ever and it's in a POOP GAME, it's in a FUCKIN' POOP GAME! I don't know, I don't know, where I am. I don't know, what I'm doing I don't know what I'm trying to do here. What am I trying to? What is that(x3) What the flying fucker duck, is that? Ohhhh Why did we come here? What have I done what have you committed to, and you can't leave now! You made a promise you promise Okay, oh no,oh no All right,don't worry OH, okay, never mind okay, do I-I-I(random stuttering) Is this a turd? Is it? Its a turd isn't it. Oh god. Oh no am i alif? This is ,this is real life. Is this game- is this game real life? [More stuttering] "Guillotine family fun machine"? Okay, apparently I'm a baby in a crib. I don't know, what's going on there? Why are things floating in zero g Martha and the gals will be coming over any minute for bridge and Billy's entrails are all over the ceiling Then get your mitts on the new, gas boy just ten pumps and the beacon will light driving back those terrible horrors. But only for a short while! Ya know, me and the gals have been talking. And our government didn't cultivate these horrors and let them thrive in the wild? We wouldn't have to be afraid. OR, need a gas boy! Then you wouldn't have to drive to make the American dream come true! Besides, leave all that (unintelligible) to your old congressmen. [Singing voice] Trust your congressman! Sometimes, fear is a WONDERFUL thing! And if we can all be afraid together, what can be better fun? Oh, OH, oh? I don't even know! I don't understand! What was that? Is that a- uh is that I don't understand ... I feel- I feel, like I've stepped into a wormhole of hell. Do I have to push these buttons? D-okay I I did that- oh I can wiggle my buttcheeks with the "Q" and "E" keys I don't understand. I don't understand. I don't understand what's happening, Why it's happening. I don't understand anything. Is this helping? Is this hurting? I see something, I don't know what I see. Frankly I- d' I don't understand, OH OOH Okay, okay alright I guess I gotta fight him back? Oh(x5)? HEY! Whoa, whoa, whoa? Oh, my god(x approximately 8) Oh, I Oh great googly-moogly. I think I just gotta fight him back, but- Oh my god! He's so scary oh, Joe(x5) Jo-Jo. I- I have no idea, I don't understand I'm at a complete loss of everything. This is simultaneously the most disturbing and most confusing. OOOK, just disturbing it's- it's Simultaneously disturbing and just disturbing. I am pooping Into the mo- open mouths of- I'm frozen It's frozen.. I think [Stuttering] Think i made my way back to the main menu that was Totally seizing up there I'm gonna try to go Back into that one I guess. I don't think I got to the end of it. I think my problem Was I tried to press the diarrhea button Which I didn't know could be a problem Oh hi, oh you're here early So they're talking abo- they're talking about, like... what's happening here. For some reason this is like a common thing. And uh, I'm a little unsure as to "why" but apparently it is a common thing, okay, Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, farewell, farewell, farewell, farewell, okay. Alright, do we have another on the way? Oh I think- I think there's someone at the window, but I'm pushing them back I think. I guess like most creatures they Don't like being pooped upon or have poop rocketed at them at very high speeds. Oh my god, what is that? What is that? Oh, what is that? I don't know what that is. Oooh, I just see it. Oh, I see it, though. Oooh... It's behind me. It is behind me, but I don't know what it is. [Sigh of relief] Oh it's like some giant Jiggly, baby head. The weird thing, is that the thing I don't like and the thing I never wanted to happen in my life When I was playing this game is to get used to it, but I think... I'm starting to get used to it. Oh, I wanted to get closer so I can See it but I then again I actually kind of don't Hooorrrrible! Horrible, horrible. Too close, too close! I- I get the picture, oh, horrible, oh? No, oh no? Too, close, oh, too close, too close, too close, oh, too close, too close(x3) Oooh, too close, too close, toooo close Toooo close! I think ya gotta poop in their mouth... Which is I- I don't know why I Didn't think of it before. I was trying to poop in their eyes cuz Ya know I thought that would be a thing that demons in the dark would not want... Poop in their eyes. It got quiet. I think I've had this permanent grimace on my face. I don't think I'm ever gonna be able to recover from it. Mom and Dad, I hope yo- you're proud of your baby boy. Oh, that's... that's not... Ooookay That's weird. Okay, and it all comes crumbling back down, okay- I don't know what your job is, but I don't think it did it very well. If you're that kind of defense thing that was supposed to save me from all this, look... I don't think it went-- and I guess we WIN Oh No Can't move Look, I didn't know what I was getting into. [Rumbling... Poop explodes out of outhouse... Forget Mark, the person who made this needs help. Cuz that shouldn't exist in our galaxy] We struck oil? Oil!!! Oh no, that's not oil. Okay... [Unintelligible] Christmas decoration holidays. I was know it keeps... Heard his parents came into town from, uhh... Cleveland? I thought John was raised by the state! Don't think so. They came into town last fall keep them himself Just like mama did... Hey, Britt? Yeah, Connie? John was overseas for two years... and those two boys couldn't have been more than a few months old when he got back, right? Uuuh-huh. Johnny said that he didn't even know that she was pregnant! That's all he ever said on the matter. All in all, guess he doesn't say much anymore. And [an odd name] swears up And damn! She and some of the other ladies saw her caring for another young 'un same time She's real, ugly, with a big head. They hadn't seen her since. Strange. Molly was a strange guy. Didn't much take it No telling what'd she was doing in that house all those years while John was away. Ya don't think... those boys had anything to do with the... "accident." Do ya? Molly coulda been messin' around town. The Chief?! Nah! Nah, he couldn't have. He loved Molly! Faulty ceiling fan, cut in [Something]. Damn things are death traps. Where is the Chief, by the way? I think he took the day off. Said he wasn't feeling too well and uh... Some other... Stuff... Said he was going home. (Random crow squawk) What other "stuff?" Eh, you know the chief... Not since he came back from the war Yeah, maybe he was just in those trenches a little too long. Now what'd he say? Ooh... Somethin' about there being a demonic gateway out back down below a shit house. Yeah, that was about it really. What now? I said... He said... Something about... There being... A Dominican gateway... Out back... Below... his... shit house. Man... Think that should give us cause to worry, ya think? Nah. He still got the sheriff's stuff I suppose. Probably just still needs to... readjust. Hell, my cousins hadn't said a damn word since in the years of the war! Least chief been productive you know what with all those crafts 'n arts What are those? BOYS... I GOT HELEN [Last name] ON THE PHONE... SAYS HIS MOTHER-IN-LAW IS... WANDERING AROUND TOWN SQUARE, KICKER IS -GET THIS- THE OLD BAT'S BEEN DEAD FOR 15 YEARS NOW LOOKS LIKE THE GODDAMNED DEATH OF [What is with these names?] AGAIN! IT'S THAT [Somethin'] I TELL YOU. [More somethin'] STRANGE THINGS Mother of pearl! Come on, [Another name]. Let's get this over with. [Mumbling] Huh? Wha? What? Wha- Ooookay... What? What? Wha- What? What? (x10) I spent all that time listening to that exposition and you are just going to Zombie attack me? What? Wwwhat? Wwwhat? I did- I have no idea what the hell just happened. I was trying to pay attention. Something about a demonic portal underneath an outhouse. Apparently that was all by design. Okaaay. Back in the baby crib. Maybe? Oooh.... Oh, o- oooh. Oh, it's a wagon! Oh I'm in a wagon! Oh boy! [Stutter] Ehh... B- But in a wagon and apparently those guys got killed by zombies. What is happening? Wha-? What about gribbles? Oh wha-, whoa. Hey whoa! What's happening? What's getting all goopy over here? I don't know Why I'm here or what I'm supposed to be doing. I don't understand anything. All these intricate story lines are coming together all over the... [Stutter] A butt? They're all coming together because of a butt?! That's- that's like at the end of the day This is all like happening around A butt! There's way too much plot! Why is it all featured around a butt and poop! This could be anything but butt and poop! What am I doing? Where am I going? I am lost. I'm a child wandering around in a wagon. Or maybe I'm not a child Maybe I'm just a butt! Oh is that a door I can go through? Yes? Oh, it is. Ah... Oh... Oh... Nope. No thank you. No. Just- big, big, big, no to that. It's allotted... We're the invaders here... Not them... We're... "Borrowing", these eyes... But they cannot see the truth. And that's how it was meant to be. Okay What? Who's getting philosophical over there in a poop game?! This is a poop game. The last poop game I played was "There's Poop In My Soup". That's the last one I played, and yet here I am in a- in an "Among the Sleep" style game about a butt baby. and just, uhh... Havin- having a nice old time and a wagon going around pooping on things. And then everything's getting horrible and- and the world is being taken over by gribbles. HEY Oh no. No, that's not what i wanted. I'm gonna.. Imma go, back to the menu, 'cause I am literally like I'm... you- I have no answers you have- no- I have nothing but questions there's- there's nothing good I- I mean it's good that's the- problem. Like it's good! That's the problem it's a [Stuttering] Why, why is it good? Why, is there a story that i want to know more of?! It's just poop! This, doesn't make any sense! I'm gonna do... I'm gonna do this one. Oma and Opa... Seven years, one month, three days, twelve hours, three minutes, twenty-three seconds since last confirmed connection to HQ Phaneron structure semi-stable, tangent strain still strong, even producing fluctuating, independent streams. Unable to receive measurements. Subject alive, Still living with unauthorized recipient fosters. Please advise, Echelon. Wha-? Oh. Oh no. Let's go to Oma Opa. Oh, this was that! It moved on to the next chapter! Ooh! It's all a continuing story! Then i fucking missed some context! Maybe I should have been a little more cognizant of the fact that it was- it's supposed to be an order. I- Don't know. I don't understand If I had only gotten some context I [Clap] would [Clap] know. Why [Clap] there were [Clap] little [Clap] gremlinnnns Alright, let's go to the mother dumpest, of course! Subject in question acquired. Unauthorized displacement relocation of high-profile variable inbound. Unregistered stork unit generation two with unknown operator. Coordinates twelve By eighty-nine, by ninety-eight, by eight, nine, one, nine, one, zero nine, delta group Okay, mother dumpest, clown cometh eat your gribbles. Ughhh... Nope Mother dumpest we're Going to mother dumpest a see this is where I went wrong. I started in the middle and everything, was weird now it's gonna mmmmm.... Nazis... it's Nazis [Gun shot] [Gun shot] [Gun shot] [Gun shot] [Gun shot] [Gun shot] [Gun shot] It doesn't makes sense. Oh for god's sake, why were we nazis? Why was I a sniper trying to take out Hitler? Why am I a butt? Generator Begin this little, o-eight hundred eastern december 1st 1917, set secretary for convergence with prime on the usual date We've got you now Jonny You've been posting the boys, and prevention. Your the stoner the first one we actually physically had to step in and stop. [More and more dialogue] You can't fight the future Jonny. Oh! Oh! I'm innocent I don't even have a head to shoot I -uh- I surrender I've got both cheeks way up Oh boy, do you like the jiggle? Is that what you want? Okay, I am so confused. I have never been more confused. [Creepy singing] Okay, I think I get it now. I think it makes perfect sense. I am a time traveling butt... And I am uh... I was causing problems by trying to alter the past. And they caught me. And umm... Now, they were about to punish me, but then, they got interrupted by another time traveler, who is not a butt, but probably has one And now I'm lost to uh... time Its been so long now since John has been away. Fighting in those trenches across the sea Sometimes I've wondered... Ugh If he's ever coming back Oh no I have so much to tell him. Wha- What was that? Why, do i have a shotgun? Whaaa? Uh... no? Occupied! That's a bit of a dumb laugh. Ooh....Where's my shotgun? Ooh Wha- What? What did I do?! What did I do?! Excuse me! I was pooping! I was just pooping! I didn't fuckin' do that! Fuck. Oh, yeah, okay I got. Oh.. Okay... You have so much to tell me... Hey, ooh I see nice. Oh no, I see. Okay I was supposed to. Ah, I get it. I accidentally let him in, by not latching it. 'Cause I'm dumb and I'm also a butt Okay, alright. Bring it on! Oh no you don't! OoOoh no, not Today alright I got that I can't shoot you apparently I just keep pooping but one of these days. One of these days, I'm gonna getcha. I must do this. You must do what? Must do what? Oh, that don't look good NOOOO I gotta get my baby back Wh- what happened to your baby? Oh... Oh no, oh there's a demon it -uh- I gotta poop... I... Oh no! I'm... Oh no, um uh... It's a poop, uh- uh... I don't know! I don't- uhhh... [Mark's audio screws up. Just look at his subtitles] Oh, I don't want the clown. Oh no. Stop clown! Okay, nevermind, I didn't impede... the... clown. Okay. Alright. Okay... This game is beyond me. This game is beyond my ability to comprehend this game is so intricately deep... That I- my- my- my human mind can't... wrap my head around its butt logic. I... I've got nothing. I've got no words. You've been on this journey with me because you made a promise... And I fear I've led, you astray. Or led you down the path of enlightenment. Because... Frankly, I don't know which This game is so beyond... anything I could have ever expected out of it and I've only scratched the surface. I jumped ahead didn't know What happened. Jumped the beginning, don't know what happened. I could jump to the end, I probably still not know what happened! So I'm gonna leave it here... For now... Cuz, maybe you guys want to see more of this, but then again maybe you really Don't want to see more of this. God, what if I stream this game? UGH! What if I did? Oh, I have no idea, but that's the thing, right?! The voice acting is really good! The story Seems intricate and it doesn't seem like just bumbling nonsense! It seems like there's actually something there I could literally start to piece something together here! But I don't want to! [Huff] Anyway, I'm gonna end this here. I'm gonna try to reclaim my sanity. You guys let me know What you thought of this down in the comments below, but I'm sure the comments Have just been a cavalcade of, "WHAT FLYING FUCK" the whole time. But I can't say I had a bad time. I cannot say my Jaw has been on the floor the whole time. But honestly... this game is not bad. For a flying butt That only deals in poop it's surprisingly not bad. So thank you everybody so much for watching. Hope, you enjoyed it remember Australia we're coming to you, New Zealand. Check the description for dates. Amsterdam will coming your way. Check the description, and if you made it through this... Through the trial and pain and suffering Leave a like... To show that you made It through and you were dedicated enough... Cuz there is going to be those that failed along the way, but you were strong. You made it all the way to the end, and thank you for that. Without you here by my side I couldn't have survived this. So thank you so much everybody so much for watching! Check out the other non-poop or poop-related games that I played. And as always i will see you... In the next video... Bye, bye! [Outro music]
