Kyle's Dad Stories

there was this guy that used to work with us named JD Hancock he was very unseemly looking individual okay all of this man's teeth were rotted out of his head like worse and you know who like they were missing this guy would get a hot dog from what we often went to a hot dog stand for lunch do you know what during our lunch break when working with my dad and he would get we would all get hot dogs he'd get his in a bowl so he could cut it up with a spoon because he couldn't chew it very disgusting alcoholic kind of almost hobo type to me he knows he's not supposed to [ __ ] in my dad's house told him he's not allowed to [ __ ] my dad's house one day he's cutting the grass dad's not there mom's there and he knocks on the door says hey could I use the bathroom and she says of course use Lamar's and he [ __ ] in Lamar's toilet and he [ __ ] on his toilet seat was he suffering that is not the first time I know of him sitting on a toilet seat old country store not too far away that he used to go for lunch that's where the hot dogs work and the lady who owned it her name was Rebecca I believe and she was an older lady in her fifties very nice lady she cooked the hot dogs they were delicious she would she had a bathroom in the back and we were all allowed to use this restroom but it was sort of you used that restroom the same way you would use a friend's restroom if you peed on the toilet seat or on the rim or something like that you got some toilet paper and you cleaned it up beyond reproach ad [ __ ] on her toilet seat too and somehow sat on it and smeared it about a bit then you came back out keep in mind in this old country store there's a big table lots of chairs sitting around it we'd all sit around it you know eating our hotdogs and talking and you know it's a store so anything you'd want is right there it's kind of a cool environment we're all sitting there hanging out talking now JD wasn't allowed to sit with our group of course he had a system selves he said he set to the side by the video poker machines word I usually reserved for children but you know you didn't want we didn't watch him eat man I'm telling you it was like watching a pig like munch on it was very dismal he gets some ah welcome back he's badly so he goes back there use the bathroom comes back nobody thinks anything about it until Rebecca goes back there I suppose she was also gonna use the facilities she came out she let him have it in front about 14 JT that's what now you go back there with that bleach and this scrub brush and these paper towels putting that toilet spotless appropriate never come in here because I don't want the hot dog maker to also be the toilet cleaner fair enough [ __ ] on the seats of toilets she may just she made this grown-ass man go back there and clean his [ __ ] and we were all not a funny time now back to your father though you [ __ ] he [ __ ] with Lamar's toilet so what happened to this gentleman he used his toilet so dad didn't hit him but he cussed him he did what he dad calls it scolding any and he's often it happens every now and then it used to be a beating when he was a younger guy but these days it's mostly scoldings it seems and you might think of scolding well my mom scolds me all the time I don't do my homework whenever when he's when he yells at his lip kind of curls up [Laughter] point and he starts moving around and you're like I didn't know he could move that fast he's all aggressive like maybe he will do something and he really tears you down to the bone he really rips you apart and threatens you lets you know that like unless you apologize this point it might get sued this is very much like what happened with my general contractor today I said I walked up to move on he offered me a chicken leg from KFC and I offered to punch him in the face he basically is custom out and told and explained to him that he was never allowed to even cut the grass he's like that jobs over now you could never cut the grass again you're gonna have to work over here on the farm and do the other stuff and so yeah he never did hit that guy that guy was a serious alcoholic though and it like really in one day we were changing light bulbs and he was on you know up the ladder to hundreds of light bulbs and JD hits the floor goes into a seizure I've never seen that before I'm like 12 my dad is more afraid of this than I am he's like looking down at his [ __ ] stroking out [ __ ] he's going he's seizing up he shook for maybe 90 seconds came to he had a little blood and his lips were biting his mouth a little bit and like that was it after that that fired him that was like spinning blades and yeah farm equipment and at any moment you can drop out so he hired he had a new guy hire Chuck not much of a step up really Chuck what's my mother's age 42 or so at the time of our meeting and yet he looked like he was in his late hobo 50s hobo 50s Oh black shaggy hair greasy filthy pockmarked face very I don't know just look like it was gross like dried up and nasty from years of smoke and Rihan rolled cigarettes his fingers we're yellow like distained yellow from those from those cigarettes he'd always smoked he drank Red Dog beer in the cheapest vodka he could buy his greatest Schiphol was he could calculate the cost of alcohol to a tee if he had a dollar in two cents knew exactly what it took to get to that bottle of liquor if he had 13 cents he knew exactly what it took to get through that tiny bottle of liquor he always knew he'd come around he's like it was just absurd and he always knew and so I mentioned that my dad never hit JD never got physical with him ever even though JD was very bad his job he would drinking on the job passing out drunk that sort of thing so shinnok also had a bit of a drinking problem you might say and he lived at the end of my dad's farms driveway in a trailer with another man named Jeff who was crippled from polio and he was way too young to be crippled from polio it was like how white-trash are you and girlfriend I guess still [ __ ] who was very pregnant and she was I remember one day they had seen her trying to like induce labor by sticking a vase up there in the front yard classy Oh see Bunch okay just so you know so what Chuck's job pretty little tear kind of job if you can imagine it's picking up the dead chickens from my dad's poultry houses every day because there's a hundred twenty thousand total every day you know a percentage just died and you can't leave them in there they're rotten that causes disease etc you're not supposed to someone walks the entire perimeter of this thing it's five mile walk a day and you pick them up you take them out that's Chuck's job Chuck wasn't doing a good job of this and so as you can imagine just like my disgusting garbage there are rotten chickens in this poultry house and that's a no-no it doesn't look it's not good for business you're not allowed to do that despite what you see with all the like animal cruelty stuff and those horrible horror scenes you often see from PETA like for the most part like those farmers are kept really under control and like that you can't do that there's rotten chickens in there though my dad sees this he's like I'll go get Chuck tell him he's gonna have to finish his work okay no no excuse me he said he said you can either go get Chuck or I or or I can go get him and you can tell him what he's got to go do and I'm like think about it for a minute I'm like well that second one is definitely the more awkward situation I'm like well I'll go get it so I Drive down there I say he's drunk as [ __ ] I'm like hey Chuck dad wants you to come back over the farm he's got something wants talking about okay Chuck take him back up there I I'm off the side sitting on a bucket I don't get him thing is you've like in a truck I Drive I Drive a truck down it's literally a quarter-mile away I just zip zip right back yeah so we're sitting we're standing there my dad's standing there I'm sitting on a bucket and he tells Chuck he's like Chuck there's a this rotten chick is they're doing a shitty job you can't do that you know you can't do that if you can't do the job right then you shouldn't be doing it at all he says you need to get in there you need to finish your job or you're not getting paid this week or anymore ever he's and Chuck said well if you don't like the way I did it if you don't like the way I did it carry on you don't like the way I do it then you could just do it your damn self oh nothing happened between him saying that and Chuck he's on the ground punch he was just on the ground and to have his chicken the bar scene in Goodfellas kicks off in the guy's face in and really kind of putting it in for life like at that point right an ass crack every time Chuck would make it to his knees it was audible and under watching it kick him and every time he kicks he adds a little retort I don't think you'll like the way I'm gonna do it Chuck you gonna be sorry by the time I'm done Chuck go get in to clean that [ __ ] up he's crawling towards the place where the dead chickens are going after him now get in there get in there five six times he kicks his ass until he's like in the building and like he gets up and goes back to work someone beating a horse in two like giddy up as you'll never get a human being in this day and age it was lead to a monologue chuck was a real carrot I have one more Chuck story if you'd like it clean oh you know I do yes sleep all right all right so as I mentioned Chuck lived near the end of the driveway of the farm in this trailer with his Colio stricken friend Jeff and Jeff's baby mama soon well they took the county took the baby so I guess I guess it's still a baby mama though I even though yeah yeah so he lives down there well eventually believe it or not someone like Chuck can even rub themselves raw on someone like Jeff and Jeff decided I didn't want Chuck around anymore he kicked him out so you know Chuck's getting paid at the end of it's the end of the day we're done with work and and and and Chuck's telling dad this and and dad's Lee well you know how it is and his lease today he's like it's like every man for himself out here brother you're not coming to my place that sort of thing and so dad tells me he says take Chuck to the bank pay him then take him to and then if he wants to go the liquor store take him there too and that's what he told him and I'd done that before you know I'd go to the bank you're the business card you get him his cash pay him take him home whatever so I take Chuck we get his cash 80 bucks you know I was a couple days work take him to the liquor store and he comes out and he's got a I'm sorry don't let me get the dough let me [ __ ] this up so I Drive Chuck down at the end of the driveway and Chuck says hang on a minute I need to get a few things for we go could you drop me off at a whoever's house that's that's just down the road and I was like yeah yeah I'll do that after the liquor store sure I'll do that for you because he's been kicked out right so he throws all of his [ __ ] in the back of my truck trash bags of clothes trash bags of shoes and four television sets he had four of them don't ask me I didn't ask him for television sets loaded up in the back of my truck bank liquor store he comes out brown paper bag and a ginger ale and I'm just about to tell him you know hey man no drinking in the car right you know drink in the car I'll get you where you're going but I see that he's just cracking up with the ginger ale so I and he tells me where we're going it's like 10 minutes away and I'm like what the [ __ ] I didn't sign up for this [ __ ] old [ __ ] all right [ __ ] I'll Drive you there so I'm driving there and I look over he's got a pint in one hand and the ginger ale on the other and he's going hello he's two fists in that [ __ ] chasing it down and there was no point in stopping him at this point I would rather him have an empty bottle of liquor than a half full bottle of liquor so I just my [ __ ] head and I was just like [ __ ] you doing crackin that [ __ ] open here I'm like 17 like this is my [ __ ] open container charge I get him down to where he's going this he's like pretty crummy apartments pretty pretty seedy if I'm being honest I wouldn't stay there I wouldn't want to and he says right there who are going man but uh I ain't allowed down there how about you dropped me off right here and you go down there it's apartment 4b and ask her if if Chuck come stay I'm Josh okay well I've come this far Chuck Chuck hops that [ __ ] car I Drive down there knock on the door it wasn't really a door is kind of this metal Goethe thing kind of a cage more of a bard Lang this disgusting woman comes out 240 pounds she's wearing like a house dress I suppose you'd call it move and now yeah based basically what with the buttons and I can see a little titty like like between this button and this button like her tits are so big that they're like between this button and this button there's some titty showing and it's not it's not good titty and I'm not that would say boy good afternoon madam there's a Chuck Gabriel who sent me calling and he would like to know if it'd come stay here with you forth with a [ __ ] ain't never lab back down here now where I shoot his ass you tell me our Donny won the truck he goes how'd it go man I don't think it's gonna work out Chuck I guess I go stay at Mama's old place and I was like where's that and it's actually about where we started this whole journey I assume that he means he's gonna go live with his mother no his mother's in a nursing home and his there is an abandoned house no electricity no running water no utilities of any kind and tool to this day that is where Chuck is I can't oh my I could take you there right [ __ ] now he's in there laying in a sleeping bag asleep stoned out of his [ __ ] gourd I got two or three more of these he drew one that's enough they will show through a speaker like I swear I hear an echo yeah someone is a little bit I think it's coming through on I will send a little bit when I speak up to laugh really maybe it's not too bad so one night like I said no electricity he knocked over some sort of oil lantern they had his light and set the [ __ ] place on fire and but it didn't burn the place down it just sort of scorched the room like everything all the you know all the fat you know the curtains the whatever the blankets on the floor all that [ __ ] burn up but there wasn't enough to catch the wood on fire and really burn the place down so the whole room is just scorched so months afterward chuck was also scorched from he was filthier than he ever was and that's saying something my father's room was like that growing up yeah dude your story's just so much better than like my dad's talk like my father had an alcoholic working for him but he felt bad for him so he sent him to rehab and paid for it until he was repealed hated besides the cannon housing projects Chuck is also banned from going in the local grocery store his side of the story was that they were giving him old food back in the deli and when they got caught giving it to him they lied and said he was stealing it stealing that [ __ ] food is not allowed back at the grocery store nearest his home so I he broke I seemed riding his bike around town all the time he wears this little war cap how did he lose his awesome job though because you had a job working for your dead oh let's see how did it all end what was the last straw Oh Chuck took my dad's Kawasaki Mule which is I don't know $8,000 ATV type thing and ran it into it ran into his buddy Jeff's trailer drunk correct it it's a it's like a golf car trailer a golf cart the greenery yeah yeah yeah he crashed that [ __ ] thing into a trailer and it's like all plastic on the front like a big bumper and there's a hood that pops up with storage inside all that got cracked and [ __ ] up and that was the Oh and was more productive than that guy one more shot was hospitalized for a gunshot wound self-inflicted shucks I was twenty-two close 30 80 I think it wasn't a 28 - it was either 22 or 25 and here's his side of the story he was sitting on the porch at that abandoned house what just a good deal off the road I'd say you know 50 yards maybe and he says someone was driving down the road he heard a gunshot and he was hit bullet is in the roof his mouth wow that's a drive-by shooting chin or was it just the roof yeah he shot through the palate of his mouth I think he missed the tongue and it was stuck in the roof of his mouth suicide or carelessness oh it's hard to say it's Chuck one more this promise driving his bicycle keep in mind it's like an old like Schwinn bicycle or something like it's not a cool one it's got fenders on it right he's driving his bicycle down the road and he claims that someone came out of nowhere and ran him off the road he was probably just high and stoned and drunk and crashed but broke his [ __ ] leg you know in the ditch we're on a bicycle Reagan this is not the kind of guy who can afford to be immobile no the hospital knew him as a prescription pill abuse ER and they wouldn't give me thing for I will say this though anytime my dad gets some like nasty liquor or wine or like you know that big light someone gives him some booze that he doesn't want puts in Chuck's mailbox it just gets gone must think it's the liquor fair you don't know yourself here's some more booze one more and I swear to god this is the last one this is for my dad's point of view I wasn't there for this one dad goes to this abandoned house one time to pick him up for work he hadn't seen him in a while he he's he's standing on the porch kind of knocking on the door and he hears a voice from inside it's not Chuck's voice just I see you out there you big old son of a [ __ ] I got something right here for you I'm gonna kill you this time it's like I'm creeping away at this poor this guy in there come on I got something for you right here big car he didn't know it was dad apparently somebody coming down there and just beating them up like neighborhood punks cuz they are mixed up next like a bad air area who just been coming down there and beating them up buddy's in there with like probably the same pistol that that Chuck accidentally shot himself shot himself with like ready to blow somebody away that was like so I don't think I'll go down there no more yeah I saw I'm getting I'm not like I'm not even bad dream like I wouldn't say just go you know that's my daddy he's a badass now it's not like that like every time I talked like you know one of the guys was like my dad's buddy's like you know your dad was like badass I saw him get this guy one time by a phone booth outside of Tastee Freez he knocked everyone at his [ __ ] deep out and like I was after my dad one time when I was like 14 I'm like so happy happy how did you do that I heard you never lost a fight he's like I've never been hit I was like I had it I'm like you got all these fights and like I'm at dozens and dozens of fights I'm like how do you get not any fight from there we get hit he's like I would always just tackle him sit on there sit on their stomach and beat the [ __ ] out of them and like that's in basically some it was just grounding and pounding before you know if you're here call me buddy hope groundwork on you so I'm going to I saw him get in the fight one time and at the time I guess my dad was like 48 and I guess I was like 12 or 13 or something but I this guy had been running his mouth and saying some stuff he should be saying and and it kept weighing on my daddy's regard we got to go find him so we go to where this guy's working and it's actually at a farm and the guy the other guys bigger than my dad he's a he's probably six foot five 300 pounds this big goofy-looking dude and my dad gets out of the car and again like hey Lamar what's going on like you son of a [ __ ] I heard what you said and printe gret it it's like a gravel driveway there and it's a really big gravel like it's like as big as your fist well as big as a normal person's fist and he picks up one of these rocks and holds it his hand and I answered later I'm like why did you pick up the rock you think I want to make sure my hand was hard okay and he purchased the guy in the temple and it's so loud I had the windows roll up and I heard it pop and these guys just like falls out into the back of his own truck and my dad started choking him and his hands are reaching all the way around this man's neck and the fingers are touching on the back because I could actually I could see more and it like you've got this man's neck like it's a chicken's neck this giant man and he's choking the [ __ ] out of him and the man starts crying this point and so my dad says he's like you know I guess I can't roll him up too much more he's out there prayin upon all these people there are a lot of people watching so then he went into what he calls the humiliation mode which is where he just kicks the man in the ass for about three minutes and causes etic so my father was the opposite but I have a fight story to it let me tell it hey I say that you picked the rock up so you don't break your knuckles oh you thought he broke every bone in his hand and he saw the cast off two weeks later and just rolled with it

Channel: PKA Highlights

Views: 256,622

Rating: 4.9439015 out of 5

Keywords: PKA Highlights, Best Kyle Stories, Taylor's Accent Compilation, FPSRussia Prison Stories, Kyles Jail Stories, FPSRussia prison stories 2

Id: CN2Vhvq8yjk

Length: 25min 33sec (1533 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 29 2020