I watched Shane Dawson's awful film so you don't have to...

hello everyone and welcome back to me suffering for your entertainment on today's special menu we have an outcasted youtuber with a side of why did you make a short film no one asked you to make a short film if you're not aware in 2015 shane dawson released a book or rather a collection of essays highlighting once again the struggle that every influencer seems to have why can't we write things longer than five pages and with that being said essays are quite frankly the last thing any of us want to read i'd honestly prefer poetry now if you're a subscriber of the james marriott channel you'd probably be expecting this video to be about the book but as it stands i struggle to read anything that's longer than a page and reading two youtuber books in one month would probably leave me riddled with cataracts so i've instead decided to turn to the short films that were posted alongside the book also if you're not a subscriber of the james marriott channel then why not start now the year has just begun and if you do it in the next five seconds i won't try to stab you now shane dawson supposedly released multiple short films on his channel to promote his book in 2015 but i could only find one i did however find a toaster quality reupload of another one of the short films and why it was deleted becomes very apparent very quickly i feel kind of stupid actually what why you look like a child prostitute not gonna lie i don't think it's a brilliant idea calling someone beautiful five seconds after you've called them a child prostitute in an autobiographical feature clearly no one cared about this five years ago so why should they care about it now oh wait i remember so with that being said today we're going to be talking about i hate my selfie 2 the sequel that again no one asked for but before we get into that i just want to say that the sequel to my music career is officially out now a couple of days ago i dropped the music video for my single hymn over on my music channel i really would appreciate it if you checked out after you watched this video the song has been months in the making it's a huge passion project of mine and i really would appreciate any support that you give it you can also stream it over on spotify or apple music if you're feeling really cheeky you can pick it up on itunes there'll be a link in the pinned comment which will direct you to any of the aforementioned platforms and because you've heard me out here's a quick [Music] teaser with that shameless piece of self promo behind us let's get on to shane's writing producing and acting career something which felt like it lasted even less time than my three-minute song now like my video on liza koshy's show i brought along my dear friend cynic snacks for the ride i believe he's filing a restraining order against me the short film covers one of shane's many essays this one in particular detailing a high school musical that he took part in as a ratty little teenager and when i say ratty shane definitely gives off biggie cheese vibes given that they put him in a fat suit for the entire film shane signs up for a musical with his bimbo best friend who only hangs out with him because he makes her look good because you're fat and you're ugly and you make me look hotter by comparison something that would never happen in real life shane's love interest patty is the star of the musical auditions shocking people with an average voice and a piano oh it's an instrument they rehearse for about one minute of screen time which ironically is more than anyone rehearsed for the short film itself and then they perform patty feels self-conscious about her weight before the show until sumo suit shane turns up and gives her a pep talk which lasts two and a half minutes one-sixth of the entire film and then she performs the same song she did earlier except this time it has a bit of auto tune and everyone loves it and then the ending oh the ending all in good time my dear viewers let's start with the beginning it's probably the most jarring introduction of any film i've ever seen as the audience is reminded of what shane dawson used to look like hey here's a riddle for you how do you get a crowd of 500 people to blow their [ __ ] brains out simultaneously put on a high school musical did you not find that intro really jarring it's just the cold dead look in shane's eyes he seems to have evolved from this version of shane so whenever i look back on this version of shane it just he seems evil the fat suit is the gag throughout the entire film in fact you could argue that it isn't really a high school musical parody whatsoever but rather a series of fat jokes that like any flight from malaysia airlines never really land right we have at least 20 fat jokes in the first scene i've had a thing for her forever oh you should go ask her out you have literally nothing to lose except like a [ __ ] ton of weight wait ah did you get it it's supposed to be get it today supposed to be funny i think so so much emphasis is put on shane's weight in the film that even in the moments when it's not the focus of the dialogue you start picking up on things that directly feed back into that theme did he just hold his own tits i think he did is that shane's only reaction is to just clutch his titties it's very hard to view this film outside of the lens of obesity but still it's so far removed from how people actually approach this issue no one is nice to fat people in the film and that's simply not the case in the real world look i got 1.8 million subscribers even the other overweight characters seem to get off on their chubby counterparts being insulted sorry he's in some kind of diabetic shock all day i swear she's smiling this is the same girl that has an emotional breakdown at the end of the film over her own body confidence and she's looking directly into shane's eyes and giggling at the fact that someone's bullying him over his weight am i meant to like this woman yeah okay your singing voices are six out of ten you could probably perform slow down a little bit better than me but you're a [ __ ] now of course the excuse here is that shane's friend is joking but none of the jokes are making anybody laugh and even when we get to the jokes that aren't about fat people they're arguably even less funny there is definitely potential in the high school musical scenario okay for example the flamboyant drama teacher is something that has been used a lot over the years but any attempt here to add nuance to that character is completely lost with superficial and almost slapstick shock humor go fight win i want to die and then there's these moments where shane was clearly attempting some call back humor the callbacks don't really work in a 15-minute short film especially when you're calling back to something that happened 20 to 30 seconds ago before everyone receives their roles shane has a little monologue about how he'd be happy with any part as long as it wasn't a piece of [ __ ] and then this guy gets that exact part tile of dog [ __ ] what does that even mean uh did you get it because the roll's a [ __ ] roll and it's also [ __ ] funny stuff don't get me started on this guy by the way he has such a recognizable face but for the life of me i couldn't remember where i'd seen him all i know now is i never want to see his face ever again nobody talks to me here is it because of my foreskin here's the thing not only is that accurate that could have been good if if the delivery had a bit of work if if the person was the whole point it was just like oh the slam poetry scene worked in in 21 street let's just try to do it again just copy it and say something absurd and then hopefully people will loll xd random at it when you click on that i hate myself e2 video you'll notice that this guy is actually the top comment thank you for letting me be myself he says as a black man calls him out for engaging in blackface the students who had to perform this terrible ass play or the parents who had to watch it enjoy the show go [ __ ] yourself oh okay so no that wasn't that wasn't a blackface joke until it was oh [ __ ] hell i literally i didn't even clock that not the comment to be making my guys so in the first short film shane announces to the world that he found someone beautiful when they looked like a child prostitute and in the second short film this guy wants the entire world to know that this is him being himself there's also references to underage sex scandals and school shootings and perhaps this says more about me and cynic than anyone else but our issue wasn't the fact that these themes were raised but that they weren't developed enough every high school is known for something football championships student teacher sex scandals school shootings and worst of all the high school musical what's funny uh rape and murder it's okay though i'm in a fat scene is that gun going to be continued later on because he cocked a gun is he just does he just walk around cocking guns and never actually using them if someone doesn't get shot in this these chekhov's gun is a dramatic principle that states that every element in a story must be necessary and irrelevant elements should be removed are you bringing an actual film theory elephants should not appear to make false promises by never coming into play so therefore if you show a gun at the beginning of a movie it has to go off by the end otherwise what's the point of the gun being included and see definitely not going to be used let's just clarify that right shot then i'm disappointed i think by the end of it all i really just didn't know what the purpose of this short film was sure shane may have been in a position where he needed to sell more books and this video definitely helped with that but what's the genre a comedy i guess but then the school shooter someone who supposedly hates his life looks happier here than i ever did whilst watching it beyond purpose i don't even comprehend what type of literature this was based off of when i first looked into the i hate myselfy films and essays i assumed that they were non-fiction but then why do moments like this exist everybody's gonna laugh at me okay you're talking to the guy who fell down the bleachers at homecoming last year and killed three cheerleaders yeah that was pretty intense what he's a murderer that would be an absolute scandal and he what he's just recovered from that fine and hasn't got a hold on his life honestly you'd think if you were like overweight and struggling and like sad and you fell down some bleachers and crushed three people to death under your sheer weight you would not just still be overweight and miserable afterwards so i assumed this was based on his own life is that something that he's just been hiding three big old skeletons in his closet it makes me question if anything naturally funny ever happened in shane's life why does he feel the need to resort to shock humor which isn't even based on the reality of his story and may i add this is one of the few short films made about the book this is meant to be a highlight i really struggle to accept the moral of the story as well i guess the moral is that patty was too self-conscious to perform in front of anyone wearing that dress but now that doesn't matter no one's gonna care patty you've got talent i just don't empathize with her character whatsoever but you know what lance maybe i'm wrong maybe i'm reading too deeply into the fact that this psycho smiled when shane was fat shame but for context you have this supposed wholesome moment which spends far too long trying to ham-fist a moral into this vapid mess and in that one split second where you start actually considering the possibility of this story having a pleasant ending that single exhale of positivity soothing your heart you begin to smile at the prospect of a feel-good finish and then you're hit with the grand finale who's hungry it's funny because he's back that sucks that sucked so much how many views has that got like 10 million who's hungry we end the film with a fat joke now i for one didn't laugh at the first 60 million fat jokes but this one this one got me the outro animation can't come soon enough don't bother closing the book mysterious handless man grab a lighter and burn the [ __ ] overall this short film comes off as incredibly lazy thank god some executive out there didn't make the decision to have this be a feature-length film not because it would have been worse for the record just because it would have wasted a lot more of my time i completely understand that shane was probably aware that this wouldn't be his crowning achievement realistically he probably signed a contract saying that he had to have a ghostwriter ghostwriter short film to sell the book that was being ghostwritten for him whoever worked on it though spent no time on the script i've spent more time on [ __ ] when everyone is auditioning for example there are moments that even come off as improvised okay go fight win go fight win i've thought about this moment so much is it improvised i don't know if it was in the script it feels like it was slapped down by some chimpanzee partaking in a speed typing contest and if it was improvised who are the yes men that told these girls that this would be a worthy piece of content it's not as if shane needed it it's a short [ __ ] film it could have been six seconds shorter i could use that six seconds to watch a funny vine or something i'm not 31 years old in short my time has been wasted your time has been wasted i haven't laughed i haven't cried it feels like i haven't felt anything in years and i think i'm just gonna leave it at that with that being said again check out my music i just released it ah i look forward to the rest of my ep that's dropping on the 15th this month leave a like if you have enjoyed the video subscribe if you're new or have not done so already and i will catch you next time

Channel: James Marriott

Views: 1,064,082

Keywords:

Id: SgUGoBdGi4E

Length: 12min 50sec (770 seconds)

Published: Mon Jan 04 2021