I ingested GarfieldEATS "food" again

hello friends and welcome back to another video some of you may have heard the absolutely tragic news that garfield eats garfield eats is no longer with us f yet from beyond the grave it still haunts me you've probably already heard this but on the instagram post where nathan masri announced garfield is closing he evidently couldn't find a picture with people in the restaurant so he appears to have photoshopped you and thursday into a picture of the empty restaurant figured it was important that you know now when i saw the picture that this tumblr esque was referring to when i when i tell you that i shed a single tier here you've got me and thursday as promised uh quentin reviews and another person who a lot of you guys have commented it's thought slime which would make sense you know trifecta of youtubers captivated by garfield eats however justin mcelroy is tagged in the photo instead but most importantly that is not a picture of garfield elites that is not a picture at all that is a painting and it's called nighthawks it's famous for general late night liminal space vibes and the existential horror implied by there not being a door so i ended up saying in response to this ask that's not actually garfield elites that's the painting nighthawks love the implication that while it may be gone we are forever sealed in doorless garfield hell with nathan massry in our hearts i am obsessed with this image it's horrible i hate everything about it and i love it but before we get into it i need to tell you all about this week's sponsor audible i personally really like the convenience of audiobooks i really like listening while i multitask i think it's an amazing solution for people who feel like they don't have the time and or attention span to sit down with a physical book if you've never tried listening to your books i highly recommend it i'm just about to start good omens by neil gaiman and terry pratchett probably later today and i'm so excited i've heard nothing but good things and audible is now giving its members even more with the all-new plus catalog filled with thousands of audiobooks podcasts audible originals guided fitness and meditation programs sleep tracks to help you get better rest and even more and you can start exploring all of this content today right now well after this video so head on over to audible.com strange eons or text strange eons to 500 500 to start your 30-day free trial get one free audiobook and start browsing audible's all-new plus catalog a little bit of background on garfield eats if you haven't seen my previous two videos on it which they're old so garfield eats was a restaurant in toronto restaurant in the vegas sense a quick a quick mobile inter gauging restaurant they had lasagnas garfield shaped pizzas garfacinos all very normal things that you would expect a whole branding of it was an absolute mess like the target the target audience was like someone who was number one a [ __ ] for capitalism who would buy random overpriced [ __ ] just because it had garfield on it but two also very environmentally and ethically conscious and also an epic gamer who is going to spend hours on the inter gauging that's engaging and entertaining garfield app and also possibly a child but also nostalgic for a cartoon that peaked decades ago like i don't know anyone my age who remembers garfield as anything but like unfunny boomer humor comic strips also memes and like lasagna cat or the i'm sorry john reddit type eldritch horror stuff fannin garfield is very superior to canon garfield if i do say so myself but also is super woken up with the technology and intrigued by innovative business models like take out inter gauging quick mobile restaurant is just a stupid way of saying they do take out and they also have games that you have to pay for on the same app where you do the take out like it doesn't mean anything by the end of its life garfield eats was a haunting empty room filled with garfield merch with ipads mounted on the walls where you could order food and then staff would come bring it out from the back i'm sure the question you are now asking yourself naturally is why in god's name like to me it seemed obvious that nobody wanted this except for the eccentric owner of garfield's nathan massry like he was he was into garfield his whole thing his whole vibe and like just general hijinks like coining the word inter-gauging i think got a lot of people intrigued by garfield it's for the meme value of it all imagine if a boring person had tried to start garfield eats it would have no it wouldn't have even died faster it would never even would have started it could not have happened and i was blessed enough that garfield eats was based in my city everything always happens to the us but for once toronto got something incredibly cursed since i learned about garfield beats initially from my patreon discord server i ended up meeting up with some fellow torontonians from that server and we went to garfield eats in summer of 2019 and it was weird as [ __ ] we got a garfaccino which was impressively flavorless we got the carrot juice which you know is only on the menu because it's orange and helps add to this weird brand of healthiness for a garfield fast food restaurant it's utterly baffling but you know that's why that's the only reason it's on the menu not because it tastes good i mean it tastes fine it tastes like liquid carrots it tastes like carrot juice but who the [ __ ] drinks carrot juice why i'm getting worked up about garfield eats again anyway we also got the garfield head shaped pizza which was also impressively flavorless the crust was literally cardboard around the edge and then just slightly uncooked for a little surprise in the middle and the sauce on it was of course not normal tomato sauce that you would expect but orange it was orange the most egregious offender of them all though was the big cow lasagna what in the world we're gonna get back to this one just just put a pin in that put put a pin in that one boy do i have surprises for you today but skipping ahead to to the present today the current state of things the physical location of garfield leads of course is closed down but it did not close down without any drama and most of this drama was discussed on massry's instagram stories which means the vast vast majority of the receipts are lost to the wind but i do have a few screenshots from once i had decided to make this video i also have some fun ones from his coronavirus truther phase which by the way did not stop him from selling garfield brand masks to people even though he thought the virus was fake but i'm not mentally or emotionally equipped to go there now or ever uh moving on to the screenshots about the rent landlord drama that i have okay so an article was posted announcing the closure of garfield leads titled toronto's most bizarre pizza joint shut down by landlord for overdue rent masri posted a screenshot of this to his story saying amy report the truth i can only assume amy is is the woman who wrote this article um don't be a fake bully you've terrorized garfield since day one wtf is your problem utterly baffling that amy gets this treatment and i don't even though i've been nothing but critical of garfield eats we paid greedy land monster up until november and i called it quits as per press release sent to you simply copy and paste at blogsio do your job righteously we got proof of transfers if we show them to you will you report that you are a garfield dates hater and lied to the public um and you can see he's he's crossed out shut down due to overdue rent and put a big lie on there i just just garfield eats embraces the future of online virtual shopping in covid19 and not brick and mortars by unempathetic land monsters we have decided to shut down not due to overdue rent as per fake report by blogtio as usual but rather it's a strategic business decision to build a lean a lean caddy company uncertain markets narrowing our focus to one popular item frozen big cow lasagnas spoilers that's that's spoilers for later okay for now we're going to take a look um at this um evil lying blogtio article one of toronto's weirdest pizza joints has become another casualty of an overdue rent issue doing during the pandemic garfield elites has brought a bizarre level of joy to the city since it opened serving cat-shaped pizzas covered in neon orange sauce and homage to the classic cartoon character a release in keeping with the founder nathan massry's eccentric nature from happiness manager darshan patel announced that the storefront closed last monday the release simply states that nathan masri had enough of the landlord's shenanigans during the pandemic and called it quits for the garfield eats storefront only it has a screenshot of this tweet we live in a digital era in an internet interconnected world let landlords be land monsters while we innovate and revolutionize the store's fearless leader nathan masri said this is yes nathan this is a nathan masri is tweeting this quote that says fearless leader nathan masri said um he's like that just okay um it is sad to see restaurants closing but we live in an era of shifting economies and transition from information society driven by tech we must embrace it while landlords still live in the past so i'm sure at this point you're thinking this article that is supposedly filled with slander and lies uh is is quoting the press release and is saying all of the same things that he said what could possibly be wrong with it according to a spokesperson for the landlord large rental reductions were offered for eight months through the summer summer in fall but claims garfield elites only paid 35 percent of the rent the spokesperson also claims the landlord took large losses monthly and had to cover expenses out of pocket just to help the pizza store owner survive according to the landlord's spokesperson the operator of garfield eats also broke the lease with hardly any notice and left the place in a total mess which had to be cleaned up at the landlord's expense the article at least like it click baits you but then it gives you the full story from both points of view once you read the whole thing it seems like a good way of summarizing the truth would be he let he broke the lease of his own free will because he couldn't pay the already heavily discounted rent because nobody went to the garfield restaurant you'll notice how he's always on about the fact that landlords are all greedy unethical monsters which okay bit deep for a channel where i mostly look at memes however i want you to know um he's not the working class hero that you need he doesn't say things like landlords are unethical because he's actually critical of capitalism he says it to deflect from the fact that nobody went to his garfield restaurant and he's going to be absolutely fine because his father is probably richer than god and we're going to be dealing with his shenanigans on social media for many years to come another little garfield drama that is near and dear to my heart is i guess the google reviews thing by nathan massry google reviews destroy young entrepreneurship ever thought sat there and thought to yourself google google reviews you know they really destroy young entrepreneurship what in the heck does that mean let's find out imagine dreaming of owning your own brand one day and decide to become a risk-taking soul rising to become the best version of yourself thinking this is your calling and purpose finally you decide to start you you you own business somewhere on this earth's crust great job millennial now you are on your way to perhaps running the next disruptive billion dollar valuation of the century under the age of 34 years old like brian chesky founded airbnb at age 27 years old more young entrepreneurs that he fetishizes etc etc perhaps you don't have such big aspirations for yourself because you just don't think that big and instead you just open a 1 000 square foot pizza shop in your hometown wherever your pizza brand could become the next pizza hut sensation worldwide if it weren't for those malicious google reviews fueled by spiteful intent but is it freedom of speech and every human being is entitled for their own opinion right google reviews do not identify ethical parameters to determine the intent of the reviewer in their algorithm or the other means to ensure that young entrepreneurs or family businesses who have mortgaged their entire house or invested their life savings into their dream business do not file bankruptcy god forbid those okay garfield eats got bad reviews because the food was bad and apparently it is a uh widespread systemic issue that um young entrepreneurs and all mom and pop shops are what if they lose their house because people are mean in google reviews nobody's mean in google reviews just for the hell of it you got bad reviews because the food was bad this is not a thing so if you go over to the google reviews for garfield beats now you'll notice there's like this whiny condescending message posted under all of the bad reviews and probably because they can't get them removed because they're all clearly real reviews the amount of fake reviews in this case meaning the good reviews which it's also my opinion that the good reviews are the fake ones so the amount of fake reviews for this restaurant are staggering please if you have any self-respect you'll stay away do you really want a subpar pizza in the shape of garfield head really like round is pretty awesome shape for a pizza square isn't bad either rectangle also not bad garfield's not a shape and then you get this oh oh this is a spammy or hateful review with bad intent and the account has been reported to google for irrelevancy nathan mazur has diagnosed you with irrelevant and appears not to be a genuine customer from our database we apologize to our fans and please be mindful and skeptical of all google reviews which are irrelevant love me feed me don't leave me thanks garfield i ate here and ended up with got rods the only reason i came was because youtuber ken domic was here the prices were high and the food quality was low this is not spam went here for a weekend trip to toronto before school starts so if the owner replies oh oh read between the lines and what do you know but oh oh this is a hateful review with bad intent and the account has been reported to google for irrelevancy there's someone just copying and pasting this under all of the one star reviews without even reading them and it's my opinion that uh the bad reviews are the real ones because um i have tried the food i have ingested garfield's secret sauce it certainly was not a forgettable experience and it makes complete sense to me that in lieu of not being able to get rid of the bad reviews because they're all real what is a young entrepreneur to do but pay for some good ones to raise the ratings the review specifically about um going because it was recommended by a youtuber i thought that name the name ken domic i thought that sounded i don't know if i'm pronouncing that correctly sorry if i'm pronouncing it wrong but i i thought that name sounded familiar and then i realized that review was a bit older but nathan mazuri was posting about him recently because he did a live stream live lasagna mooc bon garfield eats big cow lasagna so this guy's got half a million subscribers you'll notice about this live stream that there is a promo code uh slapped right over it in big font as a youtuber don't see why that would be the case unless he is sponsored or has some kind of deal with garfield eats if a youtuber recommends you a product even if that youtuber is me you should always go read other reviews where the person is not essentially being paid to like the product we live in a crazy world where garfield dates is out there sponsoring people so just be careful on the internet don't trust influencers for [ __ ] occam's razor the the simplest explanation is probably the true one garfield's got bad reviews not because of some global conspiracy to destroy young entrepreneurs but because the food was bad and they couldn't afford to pay rent on the physical location because nobody asked for it to exist nobody needed this baffling performatively woke and high-tech creepy empty restaurant merch store to serve their every need for orangey liquids and when it was presented to us anyway we went for the meme and then we never went back because the food was borderline inedible you might you might have caught a few teasers in there but but what is garfield eats up to nowadays let's find out [Music] hello everybody especially the garfield fans do i have a big fat juicy announcement just for you finally the drums everybody are garfield eats frozen lasagnas oh my god oh my god look at this the world's first garfield lasagna boom so if you head on over to the garfield's website nowadays um you've got this big advertisement for the frozen lasagna which you can order online let's check that out apparently you can't click it apparently you can't click the order online button okay some garfield comics we've got those garfield face masks i mentioned garfield mug garfield leads hats garfield eats clothes phone cases um garfield eats party cups clearly just the paper cups they serve to drinks in at the restaurant that they're now desperately trying to get rid of which happy to help nathan happy to help did i pay 20 for a pack of paper cups from garfield eats oh i absolutely did of the two stacks of cups that they sent me one of them was not even the cups from the picture it was the garfacino cups frozen big cow lasagna shipped within ontario only orders outside of ontario will not be fulfilled big cow is a generous size of frozen lasagna rich and garfield eats secret sauce and delicious creamy vegetable sauce filled with farm cowboy cut ground minced beef high in potassium rich in zinc iron and vitamin b12 high in protein for muscle growth um calories 97.2 for what serving size i'm curious actually i failed math but hey now you'll notice the price on this is 16.99 um boy do i have some news for you about that if you were to go through check out buying only the frozen big cow lasagna i believe the total comes out to something like 45 dollars because they have to ship it in like a big like cold container with ice packs in it that's so much effort and so much money but here i am boo boo the fool you know exactly where this is going that lasagna that i tried last summer i would describe as inedible that was the food item that we just threw away the most of because we couldn't do it there was like one tiny dent in it and like that was it that was the texture was atrocious it was really dense like you know how the lasagna like slides apart in layers it didn't it was like one hard gluey just block of substance it was clearly something that came out of a freezer already so i'm curious to see if this product is just exactly the same or if it's somehow better or somehow worse that was a [ __ ] jumpstart in the morning when i was getting my bread here she is cook frozen lasagna with lid loosened in a 400 degree fahrenheit oven for 60 minutes cooking time may vary ingredients tomatoes ground beef durum semolina flour whole milk mozzarella cheese cheddar cheese onion ricotta cheese eggs green pepper red pepper water garlic carrot unbleached flour green olives unsalted butter olive oil basil capers i mean i got capers it's concave in there i love this just like cluster of all the cheddar cheese just dropped on there in a hunk it's like only comes up like halfway in the tin okay she has some character but we're not judging too harshly quite yet i'm not sure i want to put this like plastic garfield thing in my oven well the oven is still preheating um i think it's time for a tour of my garfield merch that these are the things that i meant to order just the cups and the lasagna however we got a lot of other stuff dumped in that package for example my this i keep like every time i look down i'm like what in the hell because i have not seen myself wear this much color in a long long time it's very scary but zach you just look like you're from camp half blood i don't know how he knew that i'm a children's large before i even knew but now we all know um as well as this lovely garfield comic mug that says you didn't do anything remotely resembling work today did you garfield and garfield says well dinner was kind of chewy ahaha garfield food fun by jim davis garfield's cyber safety adventures which looks like a really really great read garfield one and two fat cat double pack movies this is one of the um the garfield masks that i mentioned before and finally there is the styrofoam top to the like cold container thing the lasagna came in which nathan mastery was lovely enough to sign the baffling thing about this maybe this question has been answered i got a thing that was like nathan massry tagged you in a story but it was the dreaded like one day ago which means it's gone and you can't see it i don't know if it's just standard protocol because they have so much trash to get rid of to like add a bunch of extra stuff to the order just for free or if i'm special a haunting face of my garfield shirt in the reflection of the oven like looming over the lasagna oh my god oh what in the world it's gotta just be like the metal container expanding right i don't actually know what are the sounds that are usually made by a frozen lasagna because i don't know i'm filming this to document this but i'm afraid it smells like burning it smells like it's on fire it's still frozen i think i'm gonna just discard the lid i know it's just like something is burning something is scary yeah like a food burning garfield update it smells like what do you think it smells like i think it smells like cheese yeah i'm getting cheese like a processed like cheddar cheesy kind of smell it looks a little burnt on top lasagnas generally have like crispy tops so like that's fine it doesn't smell like burning or anything like it did before which i guess the problem was the lid also another thing is i was i'm sorry i was editing right there on the couch as i was waiting for this thing to cook and i was watching myself like read the description of it and a generous size is quite an exaggeration i paid 45 dollars for that it looks like it's got about three layers this is the saddest thinnest lasagna i've ever seen in my life would you like a garfacino no i'm gonna pour wine in the cup okay wait i can see the layers better one two three four it's four i have no desire whatsoever to eat this there's some cheese right there but it's really hard to find like any filling whatsoever i think that's the ricotta cheese right there that like mold looking substance there's like the occasional speck of meat i don't know man this is that's really [ __ ] sad it's mostly just noodle oh there's just a oh the steam got me but that was just like a slab of regatta that just okay it's oh okay are you sure we can't just drink the wine out of the cups and like call it a day we gotta try a bite this is mostly plain noodles and it's still better than what we had in the restaurant 45 this is not even worth the like 16.99 or whatever that it's technically worth but i paid 45 or i think i really paid like 60 something including the cups but i would have paid and you would have to pay 45 for this i found a carrot just one little little boy green pepper red pepper water garlic carrot green olives unsalted butter olive oil basil capers it's not good there's like no tomato sauce at all whatsoever i've been looking for that like what's on your required sauce does it not oh i wanted to follow up on on the website it said like 97 calories per serving and i was like that sounds questionable for 250 grams it's 430. this whole thing is 750 grams for 250 grams it's 430 calories how did you even do that there's nothing in here if you eat this carrot it's 97 calories actually i failed mass but hey okay but try the ricotta on its own that is i i kind of had ricotta why would you make me do that right you just if you just really love the texture of noodles and don't really care about the flavor maybe maybe if you like covered it in your own tomato sauce before you do it maybe if you just made your own lasagna can we do a sequel to this video where we buy 45 dollars worth of lasagna ingredients to make a lasagna and see how much better it garfield eats is we rip off bon appetit and my drunk kitchen at once don't we always though oh no oh god archaeology oh that's weird that's where the map is weird okay that's hilarious it was there all along we found the meat oh boy oh this is not appetizing this explains a lot yeah oh there's the sad dry ricotta again my favorite i feel like if they served this to me in like our high school cafeteria that would make sense i would eat this before if i were 14 and absolutely ravenous and they served me in my school cafeteria it's edible not 97 calories nor is it a generous size 45 or is it worth 45 nor does it have any ingredients or layers or anything it is lasagna only by the lowest bar definition thank you so much for watching this video this grand conclusion to the garfield eats trilogy that i even i didn't know was coming see ya in another video next week my dudes wait wait wait wait wait it's not orange i just realized it's not orange oh it's true it's not orange what does it all mean [Music] you

Channel: STRANGE ÆONS

Views: 300,512

Rating: 4.9842629 out of 5

Keywords: strange, aeons, STRANGE, ÆONS, tumblr deep dive

Id: z1l5QpIo3BE

Length: 25min 23sec (1523 seconds)

Published: Thu Dec 10 2020