I Read The Girl Defined Book And My Life Is Worse Now [PART 1]

hello friends welcome back to another video today I am taking you along with me on my journey of reading of the girl to find a book which yes I am fully aware that footage exists of me saying I will never read their book I'm not that powerful I can never do it I can never go through a whole 200 and whatever pages of them being like that I don't know why I would do this I don't know why you would watch this much like Hogwarts School of Prayer and miracles weird coincidence there yeah I know this book has 14 chapters and this video will be covering the first seven if I'm gonna do more terrible book and fanfiction reviews I feel like it would be wrong to leave out the girl to find book I've made videos about them in the past that have done really well that I am very proud of so you know they feel they feel they feel near and dear to my heart you know it just feels right so here we are but Before we jump into that I need to tell you about this week's sponsor Aries Aries is a personal care 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Harry's for sponsoring this video and for making me smell like a fig I appreciate it the book opens with Kristen's modeling interview if you do not know the girl to find girls aren't they they have names in fact their names are Kristen and Bethany so the woman at the modeling interview the woman who's interviewing her complements her for being tall fun fact a couple weeks ago I woke up to a text from my sister that said something like the both the girl to find girls r61 and Nightmare fuel so that is horrifying but I think it's a good context to have for why they were interested in Modelling very tall individuals but before anything interesting happens she literally just walks in and this woman's like huh you're tall we immediately cut over to Bethenny's modeling interview instead hi my name is Jeff take a seat please he said in a flat tone I Bethenny in case you forgot slowly sat down in a plush tan chair what a dry personality I thought to myself and that's coming from her this is going to be interesting I glanced around the office my eyes were instantly drawn to the image covered wall behind Jeff hundreds of pictures of female models plaster the walls from top to bottom I scanned the photos and began to notice an unsettling theme every model were an outfit in air quotes a few square inches shy of nudity actually outfit would be a generous term for what the girls were wearing Bethenny's scandalized my female nudity again before anything interesting happens we get we get about a page in to Bethenny's modelling interview before we have to jump around again so that's a pacing choice but anyway so we are once again with Kristin please excuse the juice I need sugar so we're with Kristin again talking about the time she got stopped on the street by a modeling scout when she was like 12 for having just such long legs and blonde hair apparently the woman who stopped her this modeling scout owns a giant mansion where all of the young models she recruits live I think you avoided joining a cult or a different culture than the one you're already in so obviously her pants refused for this random woman to take her way to live in a house with the other children models she's collected but apparently the takeaway from this story is that a seed is planted in her mind that she could be beautiful and glamorous and a model that is not the part that caught my eye but okay back to Bethany yet again she apparently was an awkward dweeby looking child who had no interest in beauty and fashion all of these things until she started seeing her older sister doing it and using too much hairspray and going through all of the awkward phases awkward style choices and awkward phases that kids go through on puberty that's everyone but okay we began noticing the beautiful faces on billboards the sensual women on covers the perfect hair on shampoo commercials the bone thin models on posters we noticed these things and we liked them these images appealed to our inner desire to be beautiful to be feminine to be women the prevailing secular culture enticed us with its vision of femininity its perception of romance its idea family its explanation of success little by little the subtle undertale of our culture's ideology shaped our views of womanhood I don't have that much beef with the passage like this on the surface I have had my own journey of having to break out of the way Society defines womanhood and femininity and all of that stuff however for me that meant being a lesbian and getting lots of piercings and wearing all black most days I feel like they're gonna come to a different conclusion however I kind of get what they're talking about our culture's version of womanhood is a far and we mean far cry from what God designed us to be yeah there it is instead of offering you a new beauty cream a better career choice or a higher form of education or a handsome prince on a white horse we want to recommend something better it's Jesus I'm sorry spoilers the reason we wrote this book is to give you a radically better version for what true womanhood is all about the only hope we have as women is to stop defining ourselves according to other people's standards and start defining it according to God's Word oh boy there was a point and you had it you looked at the way society treats women and you thought hey that that ain't it seems like these standards are impossible and damaging and then you replaced those standards with another set of impossible and damaging standards and I don't even need to finish the book to read that I'm gonna finish the book and I will gladly admit it if I'm wrong maybe this is all gonna turn out to be a troll like Hogwarts School of Prayer and miracles wouldn't that be just glorious they have this concept they're talking about called the identity checklist which is apparently something that culture lots of air quotes in this book something that culture imposes on women ie the perfect career the Pantene commercial hair etc the impossible list that everyone has expected to live up to but it's okay you can free yourself from this impossible oppressive list with a different list this is what I just I just said this I just threw the pages of this book you will discover why God created the female gender what your purpose is as a woman how to obtain lasting worth what true beauty looks like how to apply that - your romantic relationships what gods idea of a working woman looks like and how to leave behind a lasting legacy that doesn't fade with time but free yourself from lists am i right ladies there's a chapter one study guide check all that apply I have sought to find my identity and worth through dot dot dot being skinny having a pretty face maintaining a successful career keeping a boyfriend getting married being independent owning nice things wearing the latest trends traveling to nice places being athletic accomplishing academic goals gathering many friends or other this is [ __ ] sneaky and I hate it I realized something when I got to the second item on the list which is having a pretty face and I mean I can't deny that one I got a nose job like clearly matters to me how my face looks but have I sought to find my identity in my nose you can want nice things without being deluded into thinking that's your entire identity and purpose in life they want you to look at this list and be like but I want to travel to nice places so that something must be wrong with me I guess the girl defined girls have the answer uh-huh that does not sit nicely with me ok chapter 2 chapter 2 appears to be a heavily abridged biography of Marilyn Monroe Norma Jean Baker the third child of Gladys pearl Baker was born in Los Angeles County Hospital on June 1st 1926 she didn't know her real who her real dad was it had no father figure in her life her mom who had been diagnosed as mentally unstable I don't think that's a diagnosis but sure her mother was incapable of caring for the young Norma Jean so Gladys placed her in a foster home they go on to describe all of the trauma that she experienced in her life as a huge mess and the epitome of dysfunction her makeup covered face her dyed blond hair and sparkling clothes only hid which she was feeling on the inside depressed unloved I've changed my mind crinch culture isn't dead it just now exclusively applies to annoying Christians hijacking stories of mental illness and trauma to serve their own narratives Marilyn Monroe to them is just this perfect example of a woman destroyed by society's idea of womanhood cuz like if she was so rich and beautiful then why wasn't she happy despite having a really tragic life and genetic mental health issues it was society's fault it all started at the moment she allowed the culture to define her womanhood I'm just gonna sit my juice judging lis back to Bethany and Christian they turned out great unlike Marilyn Monroe because of all the great Christian influences they had in their life all friends considered it what friends we grew up we grew up in a group of around 30 Christian girls I mean same but again I feel like I had a different take away just found another one of them on a gay dating app the other day each of these girls came from Christian homes each of these girls claimed to love Jesus because they desired to honor God with their lives they each believed in things like purity saving sex until marriage and dressing with decency we loved having so many like-minded friends but after high school something shocking happened most of the kids who grew up religious stopped being religious as soon as they were away from their cult to community and Families control this is so not shocking at all but know we must investigate why these sinners rejected biblical womanhood as we traveled down different paths the identity checklist followed us the culture's version of womanhood began softly whispering in our ears text before marriage isn't that bad come on have a little fun just a few more drinks that you'll like getting drunk don't be so stiff about clothes loosen up a little embrace your seductive side if I don't want to see either of the girl to five girls embrace their seductive side ever our personal views on God and his standards were being challenged on every front they go on to say that they're oh they're all their highschool friends who stopped being religious they made the wrong decisions because they believed these sorts of lies I'm adding my own air quotes this time these lies so it all began long before they started making the wrong decisions but when they started believing the wrong things when they started thinking wrong and that's that's an exact quote when they started thinking wrong that's terrifying if you so much as think wrong if you even consider the wrong thought in your head then you might be on the path to becoming a bad Christian it's so the this book is starting off very like scare mongering like it gets less bad but like it's really setting you up at the beginning to like strike fear into your heart of being a bad Christian you think partying looks fun and you want to have nice things Satan is coming for you chapter 3 is another case study of womanhood gone wrong which sounds like it should be some kind of way just like reality show woman had gone wrong okay I knew anyway that's just I'm really they really have a vocabulary that I'm just having to get used to here okay so this story in Chapter three is about this girl anyone high school called Katie or at least they're calling her Katie I really hope that's not her real name so this girl Katie was like really cool and hot and Kristen was jealous of her she got married right out of high school and I quote settling into married life with a husband attempting to lead her [ __ ] air quotes with a husband attempting to lead her wasn't quite what she had expected as the second year of marriage rolled around Katie shocked us all she left her husband and demanded a divorce so what you're saying is that for all you know she could have been getting out of a horrible abusive situation because you literally don't know this person or perhaps no now now we're really getting acquainted with the girl to find vocabulary perhaps she felt pressure to get married right out of high school because she was bullied by the big bad Christian checklist oh and wait until you hear what she is up to today she has a stable job and a long-term boyfriend and they have a kid on the way oh my god so she's doing fine like she's doing fine she has like a pretty normal life and she's doing fine oh my god the scandal it really just feels like they're taking sick pleasure and belittling someone they were jealous of in high school they really don't even know this person they have no way of confirming whether she's happy in life or not this chapter is just some like high school Mean Girl to your [ __ ] now it's time for another rant about why modern femininity is bad for reasons they're so close they're theirs they're so close to realizing something which is if you give us if you give women like one tiny box or a list of impossible standards or some one-size-fits-all script of how to be a woman it's going to be a terrible and painful endeavor to fit into that for most people whether that box is looking like Kim Kardashian or biblical womanhood just let people [ __ ] live man anyway it's time we are introduced to something called to the three pillars counterfeit femininity because this is the girl defined book and what did you expect my number one is called liberation which we are to learn about through a helpful anecdote from Kristin's life I looked around at married women and thought I can't imagine being just a wife and mother I can't imagine not having something else not accomplishing something bigger something better I didn't say that out loud but I thought it in my head I felt it in my heart now imagine what happened when Brandon asked me do you think you could be happy as a wife and mother she explained a minute before like my screenshot of this quote started bright it is just a friend of hers that Brandon is not like her husband or anything they was just having a discussion with a friend so would you be willing to give up some of your ministry projects in the future if you needed to Wow not a cool question Brandon I spun around in my swivel chair why are you in a swivel chair I looked at him in the eyes and in my feistiest tone said I can't really imagine my life without my ministry and book projects I hope that whoever I marry will be supportive of my unique gifts and talents and apparently this is bad but this is this is a bad example of what you should not do and she has clearly fallen victim to being a liberated woman like the culture wants her to be and this is from a bad time in her life before she learned that her value is not in accomplishing things and having a career because that's for men and God created women for a special unique purpose I [ __ ] you not these are things that I this is such a mindfuck this is this is such a mindfuck to me I wonder if they actually believe any of this though cuz they clearly still have careers and they clearly still care a lot about their careers and are very ambitious people however I feel like this entire book is just them trying to reconcile that with their christianity this entire book is about how you have to base your entire identity god's idea for women biblical womanhood but it's coming from people who clearly still find fulfillment in something other than being wife's and mother's delicious finally some good [ __ ] doublethink hitler number two is called independence i'm for another helpful anecdote from Kristin's life apparently she was very competitive and like independent kind of person growing up but this becomes a problem as soon as she gets married so at this point I'm picturing so so many different kinds of situations in which maybe her independence would conflict with the Christian rules for marriage men are the leaders etc but of all of the stories she could have chosen the one she decide so it's like early on and her marriage with her husband they decide that he's gonna do all the family budgeting simply because she hates doing it and she wants him do the budgeting and he doesn't give her enough personal spending money because they were they were genuinely tight on money at that point they didn't have a lot of money for her to have extra spending money and she goes off about it that's not really you being too independent that's just kind of you being an entitled dick I'm really starting to think these [ __ ] haven't gone through a single hardship in their life ever when these are the heartfelt moving anecdotes they produce to teach us lessons about God Hiller three of counterfeit womanhood is called sexual they get approached in public again for being just so tall and hot and oh my god they should be models so they give it a think that's that's about it that didn't go anywhere there's so many like little snippets of things and someone's jumping around in this book that it just feels like nothing really manages to get anywhere and cake anyway the two of us were drinking coffee with a group of girlfriends this is completely unrelated oh the two of us were drinking coffee with a group of girlfriends summer was just around the corner which meant bathing suit season was upon us in a roundabout sort of way one of our friends asked if the two of us wore bikinis hi Bethany kindly explained to our friend that Kristin and I had chosen not to do the bikini thing as a result not to do the bikini thing as a result of our personal convictions on modesty our friend was not satisfied with my answer in fact she seemed very offended by it she took it upon herself to lecture us on why we should wear bikinis and why we should feel totally comfortable showing our bodies she explained that exposing our skin was a sign of confidence and security I agree that was a shitty thing for their friend to say nobody should be telling other women how they should feel confident in their bodies I myself cringe at the really sexualized clothing that was marketed to me as a preteen and as a team and it took me to my late teens to realize that dressing in a very feminine or very sexualized way just makes me feel shittier and less confident and there's nothing wrong with rejecting and dressing that way now I look like your grandpa fused with a 2008 emo kid and I've never felt better a third pillar sexual freedom pushes women towards one thing proving their worth with their bodies counterfeit femininity says that the real women are hot sexy free edgy and wild the two of us have a question though if that's what makes a real woman why are so many sexually free women strong because the world is complicated man well I did the sex icon Marilyn Monroe commits suicide oh my [ __ ] Jesus Christ um if she had everything the culture says makes a real woman oh my god no God you were so you were so close to having a point again chapter four back to Bethany and Kristen's modeling journeys so Kristen ends up signing up with an agency which is a family friendly and anti nudity agency so she's feeling pretty good about it however apparently they end up not even being conservative enough for her so she ends up dropping modeling after like a year so that's fine cool it's pretty undramatic considering this entire book feels weirdly centered around the big bad time they tried modeling onto Bethany she has a real bad interview with this Jeff dude who we met in the first chapter he sounds honestly like really terrible in skeezy so good for her for getting out of that situation that's it that's that's Bethany's modeling journey she has one bad interview with the skeezy dude and then never does it everything about the lifestyle of a model was unappealing to us this is I guess the conclusion they've come to once their long and arduous modeling journeys are done the constant pressure to look amazing the daily competition to beat out other models the stress of always having to look better be skinnier have clearer skin get rid of cellulite wrinkles and pimples not to mention the eating disorders drugs alcohol and creepy photographers the idea of modeling sounded romantic until it became a possible reality the facts were icky and we wanted nothing to do with it cool that's nice I mean you can just say it wasn't for you and you didn't have a great time instead of [ __ ] on an entire industry filled with way more cool and talented people than creepy drug addicts but cool cool cool cool this is your book I guess you can say whatever you want yeah doesn't make any [ __ ] sense okay so the whole modeling thing was the catalyst apparently for them to start thinking about real godly womanhood just just give me the goods give me the juice tell me tell me let's tell me about biblical womanhood were 60 pages and in my mind is unraveling I'm embracing the chaos oh my god chapter 5 chapter 5 is called gender you are all so magnificent well that's not very woke of you girl to find imagine walking into a clothing store and the sales clerk approaches you and says welcome to our store sir dot-dot-dot or ma'am shocked he raised her eyebrows and say um dot dot I'm a male not a sir oh pardon me he says apologetically I just didn't want to assume better safe than sorry these days whoever is writing this part Christian I think acknowledges that this is a completely absurd scenario that has never happened to her and will definitely never happen to her but maybe it could maybe it's the thing you should be afraid of happening because of Swedish preschool some of some of you know where this is going already yeah the taxpayer funded preschool egg a Lea has decided that gender specific language and actions are damaging to children in society instead of referring to children as boys and girls and were using pronouns such as him and her staff members refer to everyone as friends an article from the star further points out from the colors and placement of toys and the choice of books every detail has been carefully planned to make sure children don't fall into gender stereotypes nearly all the children's book deal with homosexual couples single parents or adopted children there are now Snow White Cinderella or other classic fairy tales seen as cementing stereotypes the underlying goal of this Swedish preschool is to erase all gender distinctions between male and females its striving to create a world in which gender doesn't exist and each person can choose what kind of person they want to be choose and question marks gender is a personal choice because there is no God although many people still consider this kind of thinking extreme it's slowly gaining mainstream popularity is it though I'd be curious to see if that even has an effect on kids look it's preschool just because your print like your even if your preschool is ultra woke you're gonna have a whole lifetime of gender stereotypes ahead of you like it's weighted preschool it's one sweetest preschool male/female who cares we're all the same we should all do the same things instead of promoting our beautiful and unique design as women we're told that it's not special that we're no different from that the implication is that advances and women's rights and trans rights and overall LGBT rights are slowly leading us to a Swedish preschool dystopia which is just so incredibly ridiculous they go on to say how they did they don't want to be the same as men they want to be special beautiful flowers because of how special they are as women and they don't appreciate society shoving them into a gender-neutral box you know as if anyone is trying to do that to them like just because LGBT people have rights doesn't mean that you need to use a gender-neutral bathroom and get gay arrey you don't just carry on they're just making up dumb [ __ ] so they don't have to admit they don't like queer people right that's what's going on right okay I was always saying in the world again okay like a wolf in sheep's clothing this worldview is subtly eating the church and Families alive society is in shambles because it needs more gender roles etc it just is got to take their word for it jump back in time with us as we check out the most romantic love story of all time the love story in which gender was born she was a girl it's however living skater boy I knew it oh [ __ ] wait no that says she was his girl ill moving on the next few pages are basically like if a high schooler rewrote the book of Genesis I know I know what you're thinking what Tia why why would a high school will rewrite the book of Genesis well joke's on you because that is exactly the type of project they would have given me at my high school and I'm honestly really glad they didn't now that I think about it they made us write a song about the Tower of Babel once I still have it somewhere sorry time kids I'm not missing it because I can't sing for [ __ ] but there once was a time when we were all the same but God thought that was kind of lame we built a city it was pretty but we got too proud God came along to sing this song and he knocked the tower to the ground we're not the same as you can see God made everyone differently if we work together we'll have peace forever yes God made all the children of the world yee-haa it has two more verses but you know we're just gonna leave it there I promise you it does say yeehaw if we were gonna be forced to write a nice happy sanitized version of the Tower of Babel story and song we were at least gonna [ __ ] with people a little bit before Adam and Eve were formed God had a blank slate there there were no humans on earth he could have created anything he wanted anything but what did he do he created two distinct genders why didn't everyone feel he could have simplified things by creating only one gender and we just reproduce asexually like plants that would kind of slab actually why would such a complex God want to do that he's way too creative instead he created some diversity some excitement he made two genders that complement each other the order in which God chose to create Adam and Eve is fascinating a little worse that's right because men are the leaders that God created first and women are the helpers of men to illustrate this it's time for a helpful anecdote from Kristin's life about the time she and her husband went swing dancing after that night Zach and I decided that dancing is great practice for marriage if we want to become great dancers we need to understand some basic rules dancing requires a leader and a follower isn't that just hashtag deep Satan is alive and well toad for a little change of toad Satan is alive and well today be sober-minded be watchful your adversary the devil prowls like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour that's a Bible passage by the way he slithered the rat he slip food he slithers wait ok I know how to make this better it's him he slithers around whispering the same question not years as he did to Eve sex before marriage isn't that bad there's a Satan whispering in my ear did God actually say men and women are different did God actually say femininity matters to God actually say gender roles are important did God actually say motherhood is valuable did God actually say womanhood is unique Satan uses the same tactics he used on Ian his goal is to have all of us question the authority of God's Word I don't think actually you're kind of right I think I'm questioning the authority of God's Word I don't think that God said that femininity matters he knows if we question the Bible we will open our ears to other opinions he knows we will look somewhere else for answers that is horrifying you're just you're never allowed to question anything it's been a while since I've been this deep in the religious crazy so it's not even that the Bible has the answer for these questions it's that you're straight-up not allowed to ask them because if you turn to a source that isn't the Bible francerz you're following Satan great love that you chapter 5 study guide so chapter 6 begins with a story about the time the girl defined girls decided to go to a university campus and ask students some questions to gauge the public opinion on some of these things so what they come out with is most of the interviewees agreeing that there is a difference between men and women but also not being able to answer the question what is the specific purpose of being a girl so they decided to take these questions to a Christian group of people and interestingly find the results with exactly the same the questions are also unable to answer what is the specific purpose in being a girl what becomes clear here is that not all Christians are absolutely chugging the gender roles cool it's just these two who have done an absurd amount of thinking about this this is this is the galaxy brain take on biblical womanhood right here oh [ __ ] okay we're about to get to the juice the three pillars of biblical womanhood [ __ ] me up pillar one is helping others right cuz women women are helpers right okay oh no oh no they got me here they got me here cuz oh you you think you think classifying women as helpers as misogynistic joke's on you you just don't know what God meant this is why I couldn't tell huh grad school of pairing miracles was a troll for so long because [ __ ] like this does exist this particular part sounded exactly like it was written by grace and Parsons I'm sorry it's just exactly the same like tone and energy as you know who really hates Catholics the Catholic Church that's led by socialists they go into a thing about all translations of the Bible and how they the Hebrew word that was used for helper does not actually imply subservience but it's a good thing and like God destroyed God describes himself as like the helpers of mankind so it's actually a good thing it's a good description that's how my field of study I can't I don't know anything about that like that could be true a problem that probably is true however it also clashes with what they were saying five seconds ago about like marriage is like dancing and you need to have a leader and a follower and a marriage led by your husband like they're trying so hard to sell traditional gender roles to modern women who are used to having rights they're out there trying so hard Hiler number two of Biblical womanhood there it is pillar number three is she nurtures relationships the Lord God said it's not good that man should be alone I will make a helper fit for him God said I helped her fit for being created for someone indicates that God created the female to be a highly relational creature in contrast to the nail her her identity isn't based on work nearly as much as on how well she connects and relates to others forming deep relational bonds is at the core of what it means to be a woman just look around you and you will see the results have you ever noticed how women travel impacts or at least in pairs to restrooms why is that because of the book of Genesis apparently because we like being together no matter where we are it's such a female thing can you imagine men doing that never God this chapter is so this is so painfully heterosexual women like talk and go shopping and go to the bathroom together it's just a female thing Shh how about you shut the [ __ ] up and stop reinforcing the idea that healthy friendships are a female thing men should be allowed to be emotional with their friends and have close bonds to chapter 7 final chapter for this video it's time for some real-life examples a biblical womanhood done right two of which are themselves I will say they seem like very productive and busy people good for them their third example of a good biblical woman is their friend who gave up her dreams of being a lawyer she wanted to be a lawyer to go advanced the pro-life movement okay but she ended up giving up that career because she thought it would be too time-consuming and she wanted to have a family which is a perfectly valid choice for someone to make by the way I literally don't have a problem with anybody living their lives the way the girl defined girls do as long as they're not coming for the way I live my life which is they are which is why I'm making these videos so anyway this friend of theirs it's great biblical woman she's still single though and she still works as well but she works for a Christian organization so I'm guessing the unspoken rule here is like women can work as long as it's for a Christian cause and can be given up at any point in favor of being a wife and mother because that's that's the Bible says that sure does Oh would you look at that cool another acceptable career for women is running a hair salon out of your garage as per the fourth anecdote of a good biblical woman their friend who got married and immediately had three kids despite the fact that her family couldn't afford it but you know what the solution isn't birth control the solution is running a hair salon out of your garage so that you can work and be a stay-at-home mother at the same time that's big brain because that's an accessible career path for like the average woman that solves all the problems condoms what so the point of this chapter is to try and be like see look at that biblical womanhood isn't this restrictive cookie cutter that the Liberals would have you believe it's look at these four whole examples of people living their lives in a way we approve of including ourselves as long as you acknowledge that your identity isn't your choice but the Lord's and your number one goal in life is to get married and have children then we're fine and good right they really do know how to package their ideas to not sound overtly terrible on the surface I will give them that like they're really doing the best with what they got you know I can respect that they're not idiots they're just really lost in the Jesus sauce they've just they've absolutely mastered the brainwashing and with this book I don't even think there's necessarily this insidious agenda to brainwash young girls everywhere like I think they're brainwashing themselves more than anyone else when they write this [ __ ] but that's just my humble onion we got a whole second half of this book still I hope you enjoyed this look into the minds of YouTube's favorite Mean Girl Christians look so much of this book comes off as just like catty high school Mean Girls like oh my god did you hear Susan doesn't even love Jesus oh my god oh it's just [ __ ] so much I hope you stick around for part two I'm gonna get reading for that also just like you know hope you're having a good life and don't have coronavirus that'd be great [Music]

Channel: STRANGE ÆONS

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Rating: 4.9778485 out of 5

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Length: 31min 58sec (1918 seconds)

Published: Fri Jun 05 2020