I Don't Want To Be Born! - BAD MOVIES!

hey guys welcome back to the show and on this episode I'll be talking about a movie titled the devil within her however I prefer the British title I don't want to be born I became interested in this movie the second I laid eyes on the poster because I mean just look at this thing like what the hell's going on here now to be clear this is not what the baby actually looks like in the movie it has a typical upper body with arms head and a face however I will say that seeing this thing running around probably would have been a lot scarier than what they had in the movie released in 1975 you can easily make the argument that this movie attempted to capitalize on the success of The Exorcist and to a lesser extent Rosemary's Baby by using elements from each movie but instead what comes out actually feels more like a parody of these movies the movie starts with Lucy played by Joan Collins trying to give birth when suddenly the doctor played by Donald Pleasence reveals that this woman doesn't want to be born well that's kind of a weird thing to say during childbirth I mean I'm just wondering what led him to come to that conclusion what indication would a fetus give that it doesn't want to be born because just piqued its head out like hey you know what I I can see what's going on here I am just not comfortable with this situation so just leave me in sign please but this whole sequence really sets the tone for the entire movie because it's extremely awkward and confusing there are some odd choices here when it comes to direction and performance in fact if you watch it on mute you'd probably have no idea what was actually going on there's no real visual cues to tell you this is a childbirth if anything you might think that they're preparing her for some kind of weird sexual encounter with a light fixture and the music really doesn't help either again this is something you'll notice throughout the entire movie the score doesn't add any kind of tension or suspense it takes any of that away from it [Music] I understand that it was the 70s but the omen came out a year after this and it managed to have an effective score [Music] so while this is going on her husband Gino is in the waiting room doing what people did in the 70s flipping matches I imagined a box of matches was like the fidgets spinner of the 70s small cheap compact popular amongst kids much more potentially dangerous though Gino is an Italian businessman but I have no idea what is going on with this accent it seems to change throughout the movie congratulations fellas it's a boy all right oh yes yes she's fine now it was a bit of a struggle man but the baby's all right now about feeding oh she said she wanted to feed him herself no I don't think no she told me she wanted to so much and as I said he's an amazingly big and strong baby but the baby is all right no I they called uncle George or John but it was only five foot ten hmm am I going to have a six foot on our hands one day so after the baby cuts her face somehow must have been those razor-sharp baby nails everybody talks about they bring the baby home to their housekeeper and decide to go ahead and grab a drink you know leave the baby alone with the door closed I'm sure he's sick of you guys already and if there's one thing you want to do after giving birth and coming home it's getting some hard alcohol back into your system as soon as possible remember this is the 70s you guys start getting back to normal here yeah get back to your regular you and you've got nine months of drinking to catch up on one thing you'll notice is that there are a lot of shots of driving in this movie I understand wanting to establish the environment showing a passage of time whatever but there's a lot of this and in addition with the music it doesn't exactly set the tone that the movie is going for [Music] anyways Lucy's friend Mandy comes over for a visit and by a visit I mean alcohol I still on scotch yes but never before breakfast never before breakfast that's where you draw the line how much of a concern was this to warrant making the rule in the first place yes I've decided to cut down on the booze a bit yeah I got a new rule for myself okay no no drinks before breakfast but after I'm done those scrambled eggs that orange juice is gonna turn into a screwdriver in no time like how early were people hitting the bottle back then yep okay that's it not before breakfast some Scotch with my lucky charms is one thing but before come on now we're trying to live in a society here okay I also love how lucy has to check her watch to be like well it's technically after breakfast so bottoms up suddenly they hear all this noise coming from upstairs which leads them to find the baby's room completely trashed and the baby holding on to the torn off head of one of the dolls and what's the reaction to all of this come on count you need to joke yes let's have a drink seems like seems left seems like that time of day there seems to be no serious concern as to what exactly happened here I mean if this couldn't have been the baby as she said then maybe there's something else going on maybe it was just a lot of wind coming through the window let's at least take the baby out of this room where things seem to be flying around I'm getting the feeling that this is how a lot of people dealt with pretty much all of their problems in the 60s and 70s I don't know I wasn't born in the 70s I was born in the 80s when we all know cocaine held that title but looking back at all this casual binging in movies and TV shows Mad Men's a good example I'm struck by just how impractical this all is based on the frequency of pores from the bottle at what point does the glass become redundant and the most efficient method come in the form of taking the glass back to the kitchen and exchanging it for a straw you know just basically cutting out the middleman entirely Lucy starts telling the story about how it all started when she was giving her last performance at the club this performance includes a dwarf I'm guessing this is the Hunchback of Notre Dom and it's either an erotic version of the Hunchback of Notre Dom or this club just has a wide variety of late-night entertainment oh you're gonna want to be here on Saturday nights yes it's theater at 9:00 strippers at 10:00 backstage Lucy offers the dwarf whose name is Hercules a drink but he turns it down in favor of some unwanted groping so then Tommy comes in kicks Hercules out and she has sex with him instead then on her way out Hercules appears and I guess puts a curse on her you would have a baby a munchkin even wants to conceived in your womb I split as I am small and possessed by the devil himself and I'm just wondering like this does he have some kind of magic power is he some kind of evil being or a sorcerer or something like that cuz that can't just be all it takes just you will have a baby it happened so Gino's sister has flown in from Italy to see the baby anyway she makes the sign of the Cross and the baby starts freaking out and they try to make the baby sound strange by putting what sounds like a rainstorm over the screaming sounds if you're gonna imply that the baby is some kind of demonic being or the devil himself through the sounds the baby makes you're gonna have to do something to the actual sounds the baby makes not just lay some environmental sound effects over it that just doesn't make sense so you think there might be something wrong with your baby yes he's crying a lot and there's also some thunder and rain along with the crying one of the things I really liked about the Exorcist was the sound design I think they did a really good job at combining different voices creature sounds and various breathing and wheezing sound effects to help convey that Regan was truly being possessed by something that was not of this world hello Regan I'm a friend of your mother's I'd like to help you in this draft I'm afraid you might hurt yourself Regan where's Regan in here with us hey mother sit here in this case if you like leave a message I feel she can't hear it anyways they hire a nanny to take care of the baby and one night after they come home by the way I have no idea what's going on with this shot it probably would have been a good idea to just take it again they find that nanny is being held underwater and you might notice this is obviously a very big hand not a baby-sized hand and this hand will pop up again like the next day when the nanny takes the baby for a walk along the water she stops to admire the view and suddenly the baby's hand pops up and pushes her in killing her okay everyone so the next shot is gonna be the shot of the baby's hand pushing the nanny into the water so we'll need someone to stand in as the baby's hand all right so who here has the hairiest knuckles now to be fair I believe that this hand was supposed to look like this for a reason I think it's a reference to Hercules the dwarf because Lucy has started seeing Hercules in place of the baby but that actually makes this whole thing even more confusing what is the connection that Hercules has to all of this does he have some kind of power that allows him to take the place of the baby in certain instances to commit these acts another one of the big problems with the movie is that it never feels like it's building up to anything there's no real urgency or suspense or even just an overall feeling that it has to lead to anything especially when you throw in moments like this that I guess are supposed to be scary but just come off as funny so now we have Gino just going around town doing stuff for a really long time Gino walking walking walking buying things walking some more more walking none of this actually has any point this is more than halfway through the movie so it's not like it's establishing environment anymore and it's not progressing the story or developing the character if you want to throw this in here or something to kind of wait to to show a passage of time okay fine whatever but why does it have to be so long and speaking of scenes that run on too long you might not be surprised to hear that this movie has one of these staples of the bad movie genre something that has made multiple appearances on this show the long boring sex scene but after that's over we finally get to the good stuff on this movie and by good stuff I mean hilariously bad stuff Gino goes into the baby's room and finds that the baby's missing and the windows been broken and then we hear the sound of what I assume is hercules snickering either that or Muttley has found his way into their backyard [Music] and I love the reaction here it's not all shit oh my god the windows broken the babies missing it's it's more like as if he's looking for an animal that's been sneaking into the backyard at night and digging up the garden finally he looks up into the tree and the baby drops town a noose which I guess tightens around his neck and lifts him into the air killing him before he's able to just you know take it off then the baby the baby then stuffs the body into the drain outside and part of what makes it so hard to take this movie seriously is picturing the baby actually physically doing these things it doesn't matter that the baby has like super demon strength or whatever just imagining the baby sitting in a tree and lifting up a grown man with the rope is just hilarious this is some Looney Tunes type shit in movies like The Omen or Village of the Damned the children weren't terrifying and dangerous because of the physical force they had it was the fact that they didn't have to do anything physically they possessed supernatural powers which caused horrible things to happen or made people do harm to themselves and this was far more terrifying I also have to say I think it's very hard in a movie to make a newborn baby appear terrifying unless of course you're David Lynch but seriously though with kids you can pull this off because at least you can give them some direction in terms of acting even if it's just to stand there and be monotone I know but babies can't take any direction they don't know what's going on and some of these scariest moments with babies are the ones that are given the treatment of the less that's shown the better this is one of the reasons why Rosemary's Baby was so effective the whole movie was about Rosemary's Baby and the suspicions as to what was actually going on with the people around her and their intentions for her baby when Rosemary's greatest fears are confirmed at the end of the movie and she sees her baby for the first time it's what's implied that makes it scary [Music] what have you done to it what have you done to it sighs he has his father's eyes are you talking about guys eyes are normal what have you done to him you may say to miss his father not guy keep in mind that the baby is never actually shown in this movie but all we need as an audience is the reaction to create our own personally terrifying mental image anyways the doctor comes over and when he finds that the baby isn't in its room he goes outside and finds Gino's dead arm and the drain and while he's standing there I guess the baby creeps up behind him with the shovel and cuts his head off and here we go this is when the baby goes after Lucy so she's pushing against the door to try and keep him from coming in and killing her and for some stupid reason she switches positions to right in front of the opening where obviously she stabbed this just makes no sense I mean why would you purposefully make yourself vulnerable in this situation you're trying to keep the door closed so that he can't come in and stab you so why would you then move to the one spot where it is possible for him to stab you so sister comes over and starts to do an exorcism and honestly why doesn't the baby just kill her I don't know he found it pretty easy to kill everybody else anyway he's back at the club Hercules starts stumbling around the stage and then once she's finished the exorcism Hercules dies so again what the hell like what what was going on with him what is the connection here what does he have to do with this whole thing I guess he had some kind of demon connection to the baby but why was he into witchcraft or something was he the devil and I gotta say if he was the devil why would you pick the form of a dwarf working in a strip club I mean if it was women he was after why wouldn't you just take the form of like an actor or famous sacked I don't like Hugh Jackman Durer who was famous in the 70s that was like a heartthrob I don't know I don't know whatever why wouldn't you pick the form of like John Travolta I gotta tell you guys I love doing these older movies there's just so much to talk about and I know they don't get as many hits and as much attention as the videos I do want newer movies but I'm trying to mix it up the best that I can the next episode however will be on island or to a movie which is one of the stranger entries onto this show if you can believe that even though I know nothing can be I don't think anything's gonna be stranger than death bed to be honest but nonetheless as always thanks for watching guys we'll see you next time I mean if it was women he was after why wouldn't you just take the form of like an actor or famous act I don't know like Hugh Jackman or know somebody successful it well the guy who invented snapchat or some shit I don't know because in the seventies they obviously do what snapchat was

Channel: FanboyFlicks

Views: 187,971

Rating: 4.975174 out of 5

Keywords: horror movies, Comedy, Funny, Hilarious, Bad movies, movie reviews, Bad Movie (Film), movie review, Reviews, fanboy flicks, horrible movies, worst movies, rotten tomatoes, the exorcist, the omen, 1970's

Id: WvLne7BZh2E

Length: 18min 17sec (1097 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 17 2018