How is Twitter free? #60

finally a real superhero we need you at every anime convention so I want to make out hmm wait sorry what my biggest flex to this day is that I picked a normal user name for snapchats when I was 13 when he takes three hours to reply so you make him wait 10 minutes CNN said the world is 217 trillion dollars in debts who the Freak we owe the Decepticons a Wendy's what would you call this is it garbage truck Wow McDonald's he's really gonna take this your millennium babies wouldn't understand this was Netflix before Netflix only the real ones had the bootleg DVDs with a sharpie label next up ninja tweets our video captioned Vegas outfit day to live soon 10 million dollars drip zero this guy clearly didn't peep and then just craps I mean look at there was fresh ninja Adidas shoes oh my god no but seriously ninja pow if you need some fainted much just just email me buddy I'll hook you up okay you boys have a $4,000 gaming PC they keep telling the ego will meet when I get the money baby get your priorities straight fellas valentine's Day is coming up what are you're getting a snap from team snapchat that's about it never lose your airports ever again imagine a thief stealing your iPhone I'm getting air buds free y'all need to stop craving on attention from someone and work on yourself um never mind he texted back Drake now has 207 entries on the Hot 100 charts tying the Glee cast for the most entries of all time why did we allow Glee to have so much power I miss those days when people used to write long paragraphs for your birthday and waited until midnight trying to be the first one to send you it i facetimed her and heard ps4 music in the background I I can't stop watching it when you hit Wario with a banana peel update guests actually remove the sword in the stone at Disneyland now restored apparently an enthusiastic buff guy just ripped out after being told you win a prize if you can that's not supposed to be possible how a cast member releasing the lock whoa what kind of powers does this man possess Justin and James Corden filming in Beverly Hills California today oh hey guys look it's Justin Wow wait on a second what what's going on here what am i scene right now Justin please tell me hold on James never drives literally my face realizing James doesn't drive the car well I guess this is the reality of the carpool karaoke ha so sit like a really weird setup just put your Range Rover on some extra wheels yeah but I can completely understand why they have to do this some surprise and never occurred to me that this would be obviously what's happening like because legally hop in the rain G start driving down the road I like 50 miles per hour filming yourself with 54 cameras you know what I mean Facebook never fails to amaze me I love you so much even if we fight a lot even if you cut my finger off and when I come home drunk and beat up or when you set your gay cousin on me at the pyramid Center no matter the fight we are always at each other's side at the end like when you visited me at the hospital because you broke my collarbone with a hammer but that's uh slow be crazy I love you so much babe happy free weeks oh my facebook brayer next up we have this video captions yo what just tell her you're cheating bro I mean any guy that has some kind of interactive passcode looking like this on their phone it's probably DMing like 54 girls on Instagram you know like hey what's up babe you you want to meet up sometime and uh smash no behave yourself Johnny eighth-grade slumber party go one so what should we do go to go free go four go five who is eventually the first one to try drugs want to go on omegle sorta stick talk and it made me cry I want what they have so I went on a ten today try to look cute after an hour of driving there she is we got Chipotle very nice went to Spencer's Oh lovely she let me pick out an outfit for her Wow look at that swag I learned she's scared of escalators she had a surprise for me flowers oh my god had to say goodbye well that was successful there's nobody think it's weird to go on a first date and be like hey by the way I'm gonna tick-tock this whole thing so get ready for a camera in your face during your cutest moments yeah like you've any just met this person for the first time and they're immediately like hey could be super epic what goats out of a five year relationship and decided to transform the room I shared with my ex before and after so above we have the before picture you know it's looking a little bit messy and then underneath we have this after picture which looks so fresh Wow okay this is looking good oh my god wow look how clean it is guys I mean if I was this girl's ex and I saw this on Twitter calm with five hundred thousand likes I'd be pretty sad I'm not gonna lie you men quoting this like if that man is ps4 and switch back bruh I bought them Wow baby me a woman playing games mind-blowing concept oh wow she's a girl gamer uh-uh-uh-uh yo DM me on Twitter let's let's play some huh let's play some Wii Sports I worked at forever 21 as a cashier and I guess the customer rang up was an Instagram daddy because a few people recognized her but I didn't and when I checked her out she was like this line is so long Do You Know Who I am and I said no sorry and then her card declined for $1 35 10 million likes per picture on Instagram calm but can't afford a bagel nice wait um I don't think he'd buy bagels in forever 21 my bad but seriously forever 21 if you see this I'm just saying sell bagels in-store could be a pretty good idea yo is this survive y'all have got to stop taking food into the bathroom we need to have this conversation now one time I was just casual eating like a sandwich in the bath I remember the bread crumbs like got inside the water and then they kind of like just got all soggy and lumpy and I remember thinking wow what an experience this is this is probably why my wife left yeah it is with heavy hearts that we confirmed that mr. peanut has died at 104 in the ultimate selfless act he sacrificed himself to save his friends when they needed him most please pay your respects with hashtag wrists in peanuts nothing in his memory this is epic mr. peanut hey are you okay no he's dead thank you for checking in though this is starting to become my favorite thing about Twitter honestly just like these big companies that have verified accounts having really weird conversations like this what's going on man we too would sacrifice it all for the nuts hashtag RI peanuts a real one and speaking of mr. peanut weirdly enough this guy actually tweeted out on the 19th of July 2017 saying I will outlive mr. peanuts yep I all lived mr. peanuts well I guess this guy can just see into the future how amazing next up we have an epic bold Martin tick-tock captions I'd love to know how this lot explains what they do for a living to their mates danger deep water no smoothing I don't care amost how confusing this must be for bold Martin's friends in real life like he turns up at the pub on a Friday night in his lamborghini aventador he's cashed out he's probably wearing some louis vuitton drip and his homies like dude how the Freak are you making like a million dollars a year boss and bold Martin pulls up he's like well you see I make videos for kids online check out my tick-tock and then they see this they must just be thinking themself how how is this possible no Martin you sure you can't you can't be telling the truth here buddy what's the weirdest day he's been on I'll go first we were going to see a movie and didn't buy tickets in advance and couldn't get two tickets next to each other so we ended up sitting on opposite sides of the theater and then the movie ended and we were like cool okay bye anyways guys that's it for this episode of House Twitter free I really hope you did enjoy and thank you so much for love you guys you have tagged me in funny tweets this week on Twitter calm at fainted sad thank you so much it wouldn't be possible to make this serious about you guys so yeah please do keep tagging me and funny tweets out fainted sad subscribe to the channel please I really want one Milly sub so bad and leave a comment down below I'll see you guys next week much love peace

Channel: Fainted

Views: 682,648

Rating: 4.9495568 out of 5

Keywords: funny, tweets

Id: NH3DoOCtEf0

Length: 11min 15sec (675 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 26 2020