Everything Wrong With Transformers In 7 Minutes Or Less

[Music] it takes two studios to deal with the ego of my quit before time began there was the cube that's not what the Bible says this dude is a racist the Sun Goes Down completely between the time this bogey chopper is five miles out and when it arrives at the base this car drove itself on the lot and no one noticed Bernie Mac is dead and that sucks I get that bumblebee is Sam's guardian sent ahead by the Autobots to protect him but how would he have done that if Sam hadn't just happened to be buying a car at this point is like the only real lead we have so far is this sound that base had no cameras and how does a military on out of a satellite pointed at this super important base they can go pull images from a very effective weapon system that we have not come across before the US government would never reveal this kind of information to the public this baby knows all too well that the father she doesn't know could be hurt missing or killed whatever those things mean well Ariel is probably busy if you drive Murr man it's a lake public property just because it's a lake doesn't mean it's public property I sure I'm glad we get to see Sam's football try out or none of this woulda banter would have made any sense when bumblebee transforms into a robot what happens to the [ __ ] air freshener there's no way this girl has been in the same school with Sam for ten years and doesn't know who he is and that he's in the same class with her I know bumblebee is the one making the car breakdown but why the hell the Sam on this dirt road in the first place it leads to a cliff no sins found in this scene Mikaela goes from trying to help Sam fix his car to bailing and leaving him there in the span of about three seconds passenger door left open but then mysteriously close to the next shot this is way too smart fra Iranian scientist Wow this movie is really very racist the stereo gets on Air Force One how again oncoming flight attendant somehow completely misses transformer lurking behind this dude's chair can you wrangle me up strained ohms darlin haha George Bush was stupid also if this robot is trying to sneak down into the cargo area to hack the network but is able to sneak into the planes main cabin before it takes off why didn't you just go ahead and go on down to the cargo area in the first place so wait the best way for the Decepticons to find out about Project Iceman was to sneak aboard Air Force One and hack its computers sneaky robot alien insults the audience a second time by leaving Air Force One in plain without being seen these dogs only get upset when they get noticed around cylinders the number one defense against angry dogs that just destroyed a brick wall chasing after you the only countries with this kind of capability Russia North Korea maybe China okay so now according to this movie North Korea is as much of a threat as Russia or China when it comes to hacking in North Korea doubling its naval activity or what is known in North Korea as a Tuesday so far the Decepticons have had reasons for showing up a certain place the Scorpion shows up for pretty much no reason at all except that there hasn't been a good action scene since the beginning of the movie these highly trained soldiers are blind to I don't know what he's saying but it's not what we're here no let's not inform the government there might be one person who can hack the code let's just put it on this possibly traceable disk and sneak out to go find the guy also they're really super impossible to break code fits on a two gigabyte memory card the popular hot girls would never be caught dead eating together at Burger King why does bumblebee do nothing and wait while Sam gets terrorized by the cop robot instead of rescuing him right away daytime to nighttime in mere seconds for the second time in the movie so bumblebee [ __ ] up this police car robot but we were stuck watching comedy relief robot get his ass kicked my Sam Dewalt so tough it'll cut through a transformer I don't understand the talk through the radio thing I mean is he finding all these clips on actual radio stations live because what station is playing John Wayne quotes and he's able to just use any old clip then why is it so much harder apparently for him to just speak like a regular robot what the Autobots decide to crash-land on earth in the most whole way possible the director of transformers just slapped the guy who directed Armageddon so all the Autobots just chose to be the first car they saw the only reason Optimus Prime is the semi is because one just happened to drive by Wow even alien robots know how to cash in on a good product placement opportunity there's a robot outside my room can I have a glass of water as far as I'm concerned Optimus Prime's lips can go suck on the Batsuit sniffles there's vocal process or damaged in battle so these alien robots can transform into any shape they want but they can't fix a king vocal processor does Optimus Prime know about any of these events why did the police let this guy change his shirt between his arrest in his interrogation Anthony Anderson starts eating the plate of doughnuts at 10:45 and finishes the plate at 10:45 hopefully no there's totally still a donut on that plate once again no one notices large machines just hanging around and playing view this guy takes out the power but then the power is all back on well here's John Turturro not doing the right thing you in the training bra that statement is extra creepy a few seconds later when he does this seasoned criminal who knows a hot awesome magnet weapon only impacts guns and no other metal things like cufflinks watches badges cars or other transformers don't worry Optimus Prime was using his soft legs to try and catch Sam on the cable this is the image from Mars here's the image your special ops team was able to retrieve from the base attack no the image from the base attack looked like this you guys just photoshopped this later in the movie so that the tool images would look a lot more similar but I've seen goodness in them man Optimus Prime is really optimistic about humans after learning about us on the world wide web he must have stayed away from the YouTube comments wants to use the Q transform human technology to take over the youth this plan is bollocks the Megatron landed thousands of years ago what technology was he gonna use from back then you guys know where it is don't you follow me well we might as well just show you every piece of classified information that we have I mean why not you did buy that one car that turned out to be a transformer President Hoover had the dam built around Titus energy and also control floods provide irrigation water and produce hydroelectric power using the Colorado River did Starscream have to wait for takeoff clearance from the tower because I don't think they just let fighter jets take off without having some idea who's flying in where it's going wouldn't be smarter if one or even all of the Autobots chose this important moment to turn into a plane or a helicopter instead of the same first car they saw after arriving on earth they even say we're autonomous robots Autobots for short meaning the OTO in their name has nothing to do with the fact that they turn into cars Autobots learned English by studying the World Wide Web Megatron learned English from being stuck in ice for thousands of years it's okay that all these people died because they work for the government Michael Bay rips off the spin around 360 during a shootout shot from bad boys - and people make fun of JJ Abrams for lens flare guess let's put the fate of the entire world in the hands of a horny awkward teenager because you can't leave your men alone without you I guess this product placement opportunity was just too extreme for the other soft drink brains why does the Allspark only create evil transformers and not good ones after 20 minutes of giant alien robots fighting in the street how are there any pedestrians left to be running away when Optimus and Megatron saw your fighter not defeat Megatron whom I need to thank for waiting patiently right now while I give you important instructions you must push the cube into my chest the Laurentian abyss is seven miles below sea level deepest place on our planet um no that's not any more scientifically accurate than saying there's no gravity in space oh yeah he's married with a new baby remember what it felt like that was going to be important somehow why are all these Autobots just watching Sam and Mikaela make out [Music] [Music] is it fear or courage that compels you mr. Anderson

Channel: CinemaSins

Views: 7,944,579

Keywords: transformers sucks, movie sins, transformers movie, cinemasins, transformers flubs, Transformers, cinema sins, wave jockey job, movie review, transformers goofs, everything wrong with, transformers sins, transformers mistakes, transformers review, michael bay transformers, michael bay

Id: 7jmKo7US0Kw

Length: 7min 29sec (449 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 16 2013