Episode 7 - Millennial Sasquatch

hey what's going on everybody before we get into this episode we quickly wanted to announce that we finally have merch you can check that out at represent comm slash bangers and ass we also uploaded two episodes last week on our patreon so if you want to check those out go ahead and sign up otherwise enjoy this free episode peace I just want to apologize in advance if I fall asleep this episode why because I just had a full Thanksgiving meal at Whole Foods it it's like November 30th a falls too late no I ate the whole thing no you [ __ ] idiot mashed potatoes stuffing no and Turkey with ah gravy on that [ __ ] yep Oh lather it up in gravy this man is done and I've just know one what's the [ __ ] chemical and turkey called you know talking about people or was like all the turpentine in there like the Turpin turkey tine or whatever it's going to the tea trips a trip to pick saline or some chicken trip the trip to lean isn't that trip to Turkey lean so I got turkey Lane that's some bio major yeah turkey Lane if the lien that they put inside the turkey that makes you really tired some bio majors are losing their [ __ ] it's stiff to top the wing it's like trip trip the wing it's gonna be something so simple and we're both idiots it's just something it's trip to cycling or some [ __ ] but in kids it's one of those names where like every single time someone brings it up at it sounds like a drug yeah like it sounds like a dangerous chemical or some [ __ ] so like every time someone brings it up at Thanksgiving dinner you know like I'm sitting after the meal yeah oh my god tryptophan tryptophan yes tryptophan like it sound like a drug no I'm sitting there after Thanksgiving meal and I'm like oh man I'm so tired I'm yawning you know some adult in the room goes oh must be the tryptophan and I'm like did you want you to drug my turkey you [ __ ] what you want to talk this [ __ ] thinking so alright cute I mean turn you down a little bit okay you can get back into care about it sorry [Music] I'm like feeling my pulse what did you do what's tryptophan like we're gonna freak out I'm bummed well I'm gonna bust you right here so I'm high on tryptophan right now super high the oft-repeated turkey myth stems from the fact that Turkey contains amino acid what the [ __ ] Oh get out of here it's still the turkey yeah okay in the turkey yeah yeah don't give me that [ __ ] I [ __ ] hate that what well actually you think it's the meat but it's what happens after the fact it's the [ __ ] turkey all right [ __ ] off with that but you know we didn't we missed this last time and I think we need to keep welcome back to the podcast everybody welcome back to the buzz that on the last one felt like weird no I like I like not doing not saying that okay I think by this point they already know we're back in the podcast I think they already know [Music] talking about tryptophan yeah like where this point they're like a minute they haven't welcomed me yet it's a little this is really weird I feel like I'm just like on the outside it's like I just watched into the hotel lobby no one said anything it's really weird super weird welcome back to the podcast everyone we have a live show two days from now Saturday so this met this won't go out on YouTube in that time but we know it's really what we're gonna talk about - yeah what we know exactly exactly every single yet listing down to the minute actually yeah we've been written out mossad said that today when I met with her should we hate we do you have to send a setlist today of like what like segments and siliceous come on boy she was basically like all right you guys need I need to send like the show producer some [ __ ] like a set a set like with stage directions it's not like that I'm like okay you can just tell them we're gonna be sitting for an hour yeah there you go now here's the setlist ready from zero to ten minutes dicks twenty double double dick 2260 robot robot days yeah dude that's our all podcasts the double dick guy's not real what it's a it's a it's a sham some dude like Photoshop people like penises like a like rain and pictures of penises into being two men yeah and then he sold a book on it dude it's a good totally made-up character that's why he answers back all creepy and [ __ ] because like it's not real yeah I know I'm so let down no way I'm so let down I feel like I just wanna Santa's not real yeah that to me is definitely how I feel I'm pissed I'm so pissed x-men thing I know everything it's nothing it's fine man it's just fun I'm I'm not the same anymore with this only as podcasts actually will ever be the same without I mean [ __ ] you double dick x-men is just too good I know that's well I mean this has kind of been like this it's a nice like little beginning middle and end to this story right like we first discovered double dick Dan we talked about him for a while really funny read his creepy ass right at comments and then we in the nielsen became his x-men to us we found his book we were even reviews and now finally to conclude it all we find out it's not [ __ ] real it's a [ __ ] fantasy damn this is my this must be what it's like when you die and then there's nothing there okay wow that got really dark and I always got to bring it there to death I just I can't I'm trying to just trying to segue into the dark story I was telling you before we got started oh okay yeah good yeah this one's this one's fun so he just kind of ruined it but go ahead go ahead I think it's ruined at all yeah well then now they know that dad you know evolved death but still because that was the part that got me when you were telling me you know what why don't you go I'll just stop you go ahead and tell it to them maybe I'll tell it at the end of the podcast maybe just don't tell it at all don't tell it okay well so dessert if everyone probably probably don't anyone knows the song move your feet by junior/senior everybody first of all [ __ ] that so because it's so like holiday ambiguous yeah they play it for graduations they play for Christmas because it's like bells in and [ __ ] played at basketball games it's like the go-to safe morning news America so so true yeah so anytime I hear that song I am subtly weeping inside because that song reminds me of his duties to work with hold on wait let's just real quick it was just playing as a hold song yes I'm talking about this because he was on on hold with his bank and virgin virgin American River yeah virgins United virgins unite virgin yeah versions of America he was on America hold with virgins of America it's like a support group for virgins some chick sent me a DM or know some chick in me a letter let's just you know derail this completely right now let me just do this so I'm checking send me a handwritten letter in my p.o box that bakes it was like hey I'm a huge fan bubble up but like I'm 22 I'm hot I'm normal I'm like driven and all this stuff and I just lost my virginity so you need to stop virgin shaming Wow yeah and so naturally I I I screamed virgin at the letter actually until you [ __ ] just pop the vessel in your head anyway so the song was playing you raunchy Iran coal with virgins of America a united support group and this song was playing what was even talking to them about oh I have come for the first time and I didn't know what that was so I just I just didn't know if I violated any rules feels like when you first come yeah yeah you remember the first time you ever jizz yeah you're like a [ __ ] something's wrong this is doesn't you know be like Oh gets it enough I'm not stopping there's no way I can stop and this is so it what if I had done enough I was on the internet enough I'm like oh you ain't knew what it was I was like yeah really this [ __ ] evil seed is gonna shoot out so I was waiting for the day that's crazy yeah for me it was just it was just like oh no no then I was like what is this you just so I tasted it did nothing I thought it was alone like damn alright sorry your mind you've your coworker did you taste it right after you gave yourself a hickey you're just trying to cross all the bases with yourself gave myself a hickey too so this song every time this song plays it reminds me this Duty is to work with at Bed Bath & Beyond so you worked at Bed Bath & Beyond yes you don't remember this but I told you this I don't remember this you know as a cashier for the summer which as a you know I'm gonna recommend two dudes yeah that's actually not a terrible summer job when you're like 15 because of hot college girls it's just a bunch of college girls or moms taking girls probably at your school to buy dumb [ __ ] like trash cans yeah so it's a very easy way to like hey I saw you with the thing and your mom sucks and yeah you work there right yeah cashier and you're like well no I just like to help out she just no no I don't know then you just go to the I got fired let's make up some dumb you know whatever but secretly your employee of the month yeah and you love arranging all the soap working there whatever there's this dude I'd only say names we're gonna call him Sam okay okay it's close enough so Sam are we calling that in that because that's his name no sounds neat okay okay so Sam he was cut you could talk I'm a burnout yeah he's like 27 working there okay I think just got out of rehab okay you know he's trying to get his [ __ ] back so here just together so he and I kind of bonded because I both hated it and Bed Bath & Beyond is an obscure place where only two people hate working there everyone else loves it mhm like they love like making sure the pillows are right and counting all the towels and oh you know we got to keep the threading and the right I don't I didn't [ __ ] understand even the managers like they love that [ __ ] which is I don't understand it's weird it's like to me it's like I don't know it's like getting closer and closer to like actually being a house that would drive me crazy like there's real beds there that you can't nap in mm-hmm just gotta look at them mm-hmm that's like I think it would be better just to work at some bare-bones [ __ ] like Home Depot you know Home Depot is the most depressing place on earth to me but at least it's like so far away from you actually being like a comfortable like it hey bathroom be honest you're so close to being a house having to having this blissful silence and everything but you're not you're working you're at work you can't sit and just take a nap in the bed if you want to do that it's like sitting in a pile of Legos yeah I'm like they have like the thing of how to build whatever but you're just not allowed to build it other people where to get things to make that thing - I want the red blog thing you know that over there how are they fine yeah dude also they make you they make you get [ __ ] on like traditional ladders which is like such horseshit we were talking like whatever the [ __ ] these things are stacked like you know 50 50 feet whatever is are high enough yeah they just make you sign a paper that's like are you're not gonna be a [ __ ] on the bladder right you're like I guess like great like that's what they tell you in that when you accept the job so you're not gonna be a [ __ ] on the ladder just like you're not afraid of heights right you okay sign this well technically everyone is but yeah that's fine oh yeah sign this okay no problem all right go up there and get [ __ ] that giant rice cooker that's heavier than you yeah bring that down on a ladder you're a huge body pillow yeah you're like yeah you signed it I'm not a [ __ ] clause can't sue it oh you see you're crying so means Sean used to [ __ ] around weed you know just what some [ __ ] we used to do was when we would have to there was this section with like candles and like scented [ __ ] okay and so the way the this shelving works is like there was like a great behind it like backing it and what we Institute was when [ __ ] was like out of place instead of like finding where it went we just pushed it through these holes okay and we just throw it and then we just put up other product behind it so like you could look like if you got in your let like you could look on the floor and see all the [ __ ] rooo behind the shelves we just wait that would never it should have been purchased okay yeah it's just thing just like more like [ __ ] mauled candles and [ __ ] just like forced through these squares and just on the floor in the never land of retail space so that [ __ ] was just like those how we got her stress out we do that she was spoons and like other dumb [ __ ] just yeah you name it we try to hide it so he's about to go away on vacation and that song was playing the night we were closing and we were back at it again you know [ __ ] candle [ __ ] her boys whatever thrown [ __ ] away we're having a good time and this is like the happiest I had seen him doesn't like whatever is about it like go on vacation and get a call that weekend from my other home working there's like yeah Sam died and how did he die he like took his uncle's car and they never they weren't able to figure out if it was suicide but he went so fast he went into a trailer that the trunk of the car was in the motor like the car was just a box that is a basketball game like that's morbid holy [ __ ] miss your brother damn alright well hey shout out to sand and ice rest easy rest easy yeah he was the man dude yeah he would go get shopping carts just like chain smoke cigarettes while getting shopping carts in like a hundred degrees I'm like are you hottie like [ __ ] this job man like I just need to get it out somehow and he'd get yelled at all the time it's good to be covered in cigarette like ash and [ __ ] yes Jesus Christ whatever that's crazy so speaking of North Korea oh damn you see you see the odd our boy done upgraded yeah called AT&T it's like every year it's like an iPhone announcement kim jeong-hoon brand-new miss successfully launched he's so gay now to murder be so pumped [ __ ] nick colletti tweet he was like I'm actually pretty happy for me excited in these pictures finally man King John he's happy kim jong i mean let's say King Joon King jr. just me kim joon kim jung kim jang geun there you go he's happy yeah finally yeah I'd like to see this guy happy dude he should just do a keynote presentation that would be so funny yes this year hella polish we've revolutionized ballistic missiles previously we had shitty Russian technology but we've made it into 1999 this year we have a warhead I like how there's always a Becks Moab X yeah they always like threaten like Oh US is now within range it's like mother [ __ ] do it yeah I'm a little bit at that point just just do it are you yeah really you want to see the whole earth destroyed I don't I don't think he's got it like that I don't know man I feel like mind you I know absolutely nothing about any of this but I feel like I feel like if they're only now getting like ballistic missiles the US must have some crazy [ __ ] alien technology from area 51 that shoots that [ __ ] down and shoots it into [ __ ] a black hole in space it's never been tested no it's never been tested I'm talking about like that's that's what we know you know the government's got some crazy [ __ ] going on that we don't know about yeah I think anti-air is hard though like once a [ __ ] warhead is like on route yeah it's kind of hard to like hit that and like video games or is like oh yeah but it might be that's I'm saying true yeah we don't even know what I'm saying they probably have alien technology that we don't even you know saying this is Infowars now by the way have you uh you seen that Navy railgun no it's that [ __ ] is [ __ ] insane what is it it's like it's like a literal like they load a rail they can shoot it fast as [ __ ] it's just a giant rod traveling and I don't know 8100 million miles an hour instead of like a missile or something okay just imagine like a building column just flying at 20,000 miles an hour and what does it do dude it would just eradicate anything in this [ __ ] path like a just through a bunch of [ __ ] oh my god that's insane yeah that's a real thing that's me how that the government has yeah and they like those videos on YouTube damn yeah when you get hit with a with a railgun you'd be like he'd be like that would about hit BAE with where I'll go no sorry that must be so I mean we talked about this before but just imagine that moment like what wasn't Japan when that [ __ ] war like the nuke came down like yeah your total is 17 yeah yeah but imagine being like far away from it yeah you have two minutes to live yeah it's just like it just you ever hear like a giant plane or some [ __ ] and you're like oh [ __ ] I mean yeah like it's just a small rumbling and you're like oh god damn it alright goodbye you're half expecting to look out the window and just see this like red horizon just slowly coming closer to you all my skin is gonna go away it's one of those cartoons where you just bones standing there they fall down I try to freeze and some like funny ass pose I just like going the jerking jerking pose yeah and confuse them like was he died phallic yeah white he was real he was wrinkled double dick Dan it's not a myth test your DNA and [ __ ] because that's gonna be the goal of this podcast to find double dick Dan in the flesh and prove that he's a [ __ ] real person or make one make a double dick Dan oh oh you done did it you did it what kind of a producer are you memory card full my my ass sorry guys it's gonna be a brief pause in the video feed here as Noel gets his [ __ ] together listen I'm rocking a brand new jacket though as you can probably tell it's hot as [ __ ] in here and I don't need to be wearing this at all it's actually I'm actually very uncomfortable but you're doing that [ __ ] in high school when the fit depends on the sweater and you're just sweating your [ __ ] eyes out exactly because without this it's just I'm wearing a white shirt and black pants as nothing but with this dude you know was you know was really disappointing no I was just wearing this at fullscreen and I got like two compliments on people a nice check I'm like thank you I'm feeling good feeling like pretty self confident all that stuff there's another guy comes up to me goes oh yo is that it like you were in phase colors what and he's like yeah and he picks up this shoes that her phase merch days clan guys this is like a gaming crew or whatever he picks up the shoes and it had it's these three exact colors gold blue and red bra is this the official announcement like you're in phase yeah this is it I'm actually phase Kody is what they go oh god damn it dude this is like my nightmare it is look what let's have to find a [ __ ] memory card oh my can you just delete the last two things on this one yeah I suppose we're in a conundrum here we'll just do it just look for it for the rest of the episode oh my god like gay like why why why isn't why aren't gamertags ever normal like that like I get the Klan name that has to be weird [ __ ] like Capital Z it's like why does it why is it a capital Z first of all like phase reign was one of it was one of the dudes I mean phase rain or phase banks or whatever why isn't it just like phase Steve well okay let me nerd out for a sec kind of used to be that way yeah pro gamers like they used to have like their alias then they would in parentheses put their formal name really like cypher like open carrot a dot Stevenson how long ago was this you know three years ago I'm 21 what was your gamertag oh no no no no I'll tell you yours if you tell me mine I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours no because I don't want to tell mine cuz it will well then people can find me and this is like my secret like I still have an active attic oh you do behavior with this oh this is one you still use yeah I still want anyone know it does you want people to have yeah okay now all right but I'll tell you a fun little story yeah sure I love stories big fan big fan yeah go for it so I had a buddy who was like like a semi-pro counter-strike player mhm and he got me into a popular club called Club v like a like a social club like one oak sort of thing yeah but for like like pro counter-strike players extremely [ __ ] nerd like one oak like you go out to the club like you get drunk and go like that no no no no no no we're talking like a lion no and online yeah penguin sort of thing yes so if you were in Club five you would put the number five in brackets after your name oh it's a clan no no because you'd be on a team but like this club was like considered like premier players okay so really most of them were hackers mhm so anyway it was dude it was such a mental thing because I didn't belong in there no one knew who the [ __ ] I was and the end of this story is one day some dude goes hey who the [ __ ] are you and I'm like uh Tom put me in and they banned me just kicked me the [ __ ] out Jesus like yeah it doesn't matter I never heard of you that was like a huge like hit teary go I knew it was coming really yeah I just milked it while I was in that pitch my buddies and I used to I because on xbox the only way or no was it you don't change your game on Call of Duty you can just add a clan right tag right right and you can just make it whatever you want yeah and so my buddy and I would just go into games and make our clan tag the same as like for other people that were in there they would get so pissed and there's nothing they could do leave the game it's so funny so funny dude we were like team kill and [ __ ] like that like with it strong it's like it's just such like a like there's no reason it's a geological thing to get mad about like it's the easiest thing to do these guys would get so irrationally mad at us you can't have the [ __ ] face thing or like you know read whatever sniff snipe [ __ ] I don't even know what is what's a good [ __ ] clan tag Oh Lee uh no not least oh Jesus there was a man rise Ric I'm trying to think of like funny um there's like a popular like team back in the day called pub masters they're actually really [ __ ] good at Counter Strike but they did not take that [ __ ] serious so that they would play in this league and they were like top level but like in the match like they would do [ __ ] like like five of them would stack up and like run on each other's heads as like a giant column coming down some way so like dudes like hold like thinking like alright this is gonna be like a real like strategy or something you just see a tower of five players shotguns and flash bang that's really funny some other [ __ ] they would do was like they would pile up in like a one part of the map and they would all hold grenades and if you unclick the grenade and you died it would still go off yeah so they just wait for one person to like push yeah and then just suicide bomb I'm just trying to get him like but they would always lose but it was pretty [ __ ] funny like damn that's really really funny how they troll super hard I remember my the I used to play Gears of War a lot online for some reason my friends and I loved playing that game online yeah and I remember the most absurd gaming gamertag that I ever saw mmm was this one I don't even I don't even want to say this it was this guy his gamertag was I hate Asians all caps somehow that got through the [ __ ] Xbox filters freeze beam but you couldn't even do ass with two Z's they would like no they'd be like no really yeah like super-strict defined like really crazy way of getting around the filters so you can hold the penis and show like that this guy just said I hate Asians and he was always there he was always playing always how are you not like getting chewed out for this on the regular probably this has [ __ ] muted yeah probably Jesus that was you man that's [ __ ] up dude look you're watching his I hate Asians I was [ __ ] up really [ __ ] up just some Asian guys like yeah I just thought it was funny yeah sorry dude that's we can have phase banks yet and do you read about his a little scandal yeah dude they got that was [ __ ] up man what an idiot his [ __ ] done [ __ ] who hey babies girlfriend got beat up no dude wait what happened okay yeah what's the actual story so the bar I didn't like watch I did all I saw because my girlfriend follows Elissa and so she was on her snapchat or some [ __ ] and she was like holy [ __ ] like I was he got punched in the face or whatever and so I looked at it and I was like BAM that's crazy and then she was like you know find this person find this person they're like screenshots from a security camera or some [ __ ] so I just assumed she had like assaulted this she did but banks and her when I'm like this drunk like tirade and [ __ ] like on snapchat claiming it was the bar and this and that so the bar responded and they put all the security footage now banks is claiming they're creating a narrative but to me it's this pretty cut-and-dry what the [ __ ] happened they're like Alyssa so what it was is Alyssa was using a bathroom okay and she was using it after hours and they usually close that area off because the manager goes down there and counts money and so the managers down there counting money banks comes down she hears a male voice she notifies securities that caters someone down here shouldn't be here because you know why would there be a male at the manager yeah okay so she notifies security security guard comes down he goes hey like what's up man like what are you guys doing you know the list so they okay man I just need you to clear out here and banks like gets an ego about it he's like kind of like taunting him and like dancing around like being kind of an ass and the dude is just kind of like asking like gin like hey could you leave could you leave so then banks pushes him it looks like and then the office manager hears like the commotion so there's the there's the lady counting cash and there's the office manager he's a male he sees what's going on he's handing the girl another drawer to count he hands it to her he runs down the hall and they're starting to move him out there trying to escort him out because he's like being kind of physical so then they're like towards the bottom of this staircase and banks claims like he gets punched or something but he initiates a headlock and the dude likes like puts the frame like he drops him in distills and he tries to outline who's who and it seems pretty accurate so then they're like it's like five claims that they made like Alissa claimed that someone or banks is saying that someone grabbed her ass and it's just the [ __ ] proof is in the pudding so what really happened was the escorted them out banks is like just losing his mind he's being a drunk [ __ ] also he wears a hat because he's super balding had no idea about that oh really yeah his hair line looks [ __ ] up there so whatever they're outside and Alissa it's like these two people who are at the bar is like getting into it with Alyssa and Alyssa is like filming them and like he just lets the tape run you can see it like she's kind of like agitating this other girl by filming her and like just putting her on camera so the girl she's like man [ __ ] this and she just [ __ ] pops Alyssa like just boom hits her in the [ __ ] face so then there's a there's another dude standing there he's trying to break them up that's all he's doing he's just holding them apart and banks comes running up like an idiot and he punches that fool in the back of the head he sucker punches him like a few times so they go to the ground oh my god I'm cringing yeah all this in that so this is all in the footage yeah and the dude like lays it out so even but here's my thing even if they left out footage even if banks was really hit by the security guards the way they handled him out they just like they assured him out so it doesn't suggest to me that actual scuffle happened at or like a strong one even if it did they were like treating it with respect the VIP bouncer comes out to him and like they carefully usher him out and she got popped like she was standing out there agitating this chicken she got [ __ ] she got punched up yes that's that's what happened she got [ __ ] sucked up and she deserved it a little oh my god dude that's crazy yeah no maybe I don't have all the information I'm speaking too fast but from the looks of things it seems like I mean it kind of seems like that's all like if there's video footage of this [ __ ] happening mind you I'm not gonna I can't say I haven't seen it so whatever but like this is what I was kind of saying that night after it happened I was like all right immediately right I am only getting their side of the story and if it's true then it's [ __ ] up you know you know you got punched you up beat up that sucks right mm-hmm it's also like if there's also a little bit of me that's like if this drama keeps happening to you like didn't you just have right like a few months ago some [ __ ] about like Jake Paul's girlfriend or something got beat up you know something like that you had a club yeah like why is this following you around not because you're super famous there's tons of super famous people where this [ __ ] just doesn't happen in constantly maybe you're the cause of the drama this [ __ ] if drama keeps happening to you you're the [ __ ] cause dude that fool was just drunk and he's just like it's like on snapchat just hammer like you'll [ __ ] this place almost sooo [ __ ] over there getting like the bar like patron like not paying like employees and [ __ ] they're getting like death threats and like all this and that it's just it's ridiculous man yeah it's it's [ __ ] dangerous to have like a audience that big and be that stupid but just like you know like they're it's such a one-sided thing yeah I mean now everybody just gets you know their version of it and it's like it's like yeah but yeah if you're being an idiot in public and you're antagonizing people and whatever remind you it wasn't like some [ __ ] Midwest town so I'm guessing Cleveland was it okay well I don't really get some Midwest everyone from Cleveland you got so [ __ ] offended if [ __ ] you man I'm people don't cleave like right you know at a bar at a club in Cleveland people probably looking for a fight yeah like I gotta do is play your camera and film someone they're like yeah wait for that [ __ ] well that's the other thing that I want to point out is like anywhere else like the same LA bro like la people I think are used to having cameras around yeah well you go to like a just go to some random like city yeah you don't know what they're like that pulling out a camera might be [ __ ] rude yeah you know I mean what the [ __ ] are you filming me bro it's just like it's just all it is it's just like recognizing social cues that's all it is like it's not that [ __ ] hard to like just do not be a dumbass about [ __ ] like why you gotta have an ego and brew war you torture more gertie you shouldn't be [ __ ] down here in the first place yeah get out speed normal yeah fit in just be something else it's not you is you sucks Alissa claim like she got pushed down the stairs okay doesn't happen just Reb doesn't happen this doesn't happen she's dangerous dude who's lying so that was the Des Moines of people that was the point believe it hook line and sinker that the bar brought up there like it's it's crazy that none of these people critically think about the situation yeah they don't ever consider like alright this is what they're gonna tell me what's the other half yeah I don't know you know what and also uh the snaps before Alissa was like they were both there well this is parents or thing mm-hmm it's got it not be the best first impression if banks was the first time I met her parents dude highlights Alyssa's mom talking to a bouncer she's like I'm so sorry like or whatever it's supposedly her mom like telling the bouncer I'm sorry for like what they're doing I don't know man I just saw it someone just seems like was on Twitter or something sorry it just seems like a lot of effort on their part yeah to justify what they did I know talking a little too much about it yeah so I mean it's content dude that's how they I mean they're that's what they do is like I don't know what else do they talk about that's true they just stir up drama and they're like all right guys like you know here's a 20-minute video of me describing what happened from my perspective it's like it should have happened you should talk about dicks yeah that's what they should tell you knows a guy out there with two dicks it might not even be real why are we talking more about this is just a new sasquatch see the shadow in the forest - genetics yo we should start like a fake everyone in tiny me gang should start a [ __ ] like a fake conspiracy site with some info war [ __ ] for a double dick man sighting yeah hilarious well I'll support it we'll all do like self tape interviews and [ __ ] he's so funny I've seen it I've seen him I saw it I saw it back in 1985 if we can get one of us unlike national news television yeah talking about having seen the double dick man yeah that would be [ __ ] money and just never never like a sexual running no never like I went back for this guy after midnight out and he had two dicks and but I went to the bathroom he was gone by the time I got out didn't have to enjoy the two dicks or some [ __ ] never like that it's just like I just exactly her Psalm like you know what I saw the [ __ ] like the shadow you know what I mean it was a hot summer day he's wearing white linen pants and I saw I was just walking down the street it's just caught a glimpse of both dicks on either side of the seam i couldnt believe what I saw a band just like that he was gone he just turned down an alley and I never saw the guy again here's the follow a plane and dance here's the follow up I've seen him as well last winter mm-hmm he's peeing in my lawn okay there's two streams going into the snow no he leaves two streams in the snow how can he leave two streams get out of town if he doesn't have two penises did he write his name twice one one one chord and one backwards Rose first and last name simultaneously double dick holy [ __ ] there's been a lot of penises in the news lately I mean all the sexual harassment oh yeah yeah Matt Lorie even this guy yep that shit's nuts dude he's just reading about that at Whole Foods he had a [ __ ] lock outlet and he had a button on his [ __ ] to lock the door dude man that that that type of - why are they endorsing that that's a like a rape weapon yeah I know he's locked that shouldn't be like suck it off I didn't know he made 25 million dollars a year he was like there he was like there he was like their [ __ ] star child they had to keep him happy because it were the number one rated show and it was like all because of him up here I don't know oh yeah that's what he was like the Olympics guy right that's really good I don't know okay that's why I recognized it from I don't watch [ __ ] whatever CNBC yeah that she's not stood I scream shouted this [ __ ] um this like headline about the [ __ ] and this should have me laughing cuz I'm like no that's actually not the problem get a [ __ ] get a load of this NBC faces high-stakes decision format Laura's replacement metal our by the way Matt Lauer or ya know the high stakes decision is how you don't get [ __ ] sued to death and how you gonna remedy the situation yeah all these women he's [ __ ] yeah yeah now you're gonna replace the [ __ ] guy who talks about [ __ ] I don't know yeah like why did you let him have a lock button on his desk yeah all that [ __ ] is wild bro well I mean like that's one of those things is like once once it's a bad thing then it the whole time it was like why is but an innocent person with a lock on their right things maybe you just didn't want to get up to now that's [ __ ] up for every yet Psilakis I think you're either like watching porn or you're like sexually harassing someone basically that's it like you know I mean no one wants to like eat their lunch that's just some like [ __ ] my privacy it's like some [ __ ] like but I go in on this [ __ ] turkey grinder so just [ __ ] meatball grinder he'll buddy go in on this [ __ ] on lock the damn door and then just [ __ ] mouth or ass it's not a [ __ ] plate a lobster on my goddamn pants from Macy's that's like some like supervillain [ __ ] yes which under the desk right now people only have that in banks yeah like notifier like robbers yeah that must be the scariest [ __ ] hears in his office you're like hey Matt he's like what's happening and just you see his like bicep just slightly tilt yeah God we just hear that sound like alright great meeting oh [ __ ] oh Jesus oh man I mean I kid but this [ __ ] out did is real [ __ ] up man let me tell you he's an animal in there too I'm sorry I'm sorry let me just bring it back to something happy to Dix you're not saying but like the winning pants yes really good that was based that was based on a real when I was in London we were there's a we were my friend and I were talking I'm just gonna be I'm just gonna be a listen probably not the greatest time to be a pig where you have 2 real talking about Matt Lauer but like you know the Frieden imple thing is a big thing in London yeah in the summertime yeah girls walk around and you know I mean there's just not a lot of bras you see on the street women it's good think generally I mean ok try to be careful here I'm John it's a good thing it's just about sexual assaulting like you know I mean I like women's bodies great and so the more you know I mean the more you've li objective objectively they're great but not in like you're not objectifying them no no neutrally yeah just everyone passive appreciation now yeah nipples press loops breasts on cities I think that's a safe state easier dope yeah let's agree on that yeah move forward yeah yeah desert up good so anyways apparently this is a thing to use of women or you know what I mean they're letting them fly which is great apparently this is thing for dudes to in London and I guess like all over the place I just like didn't really girls notices [ __ ] obviously more but dudes will like purposely wear pants and [ __ ] like that that like show off their package um what kind of pants were those have like a padded cup or something is there like a shape up just up a bunch of Kleenex in there yeah yeah I just put a big go big old kielbasa I'm just gonna put a cucumber in each leg yeah it's just fine it genitals are just flying around these days in public no I'm not again this is not the greatest time to talk about generals flying around but I'm just saying you know people walk down the street we [ __ ] shear just they're just wearing saran wrap we're about to go roaming with this [ __ ] about to be naked again that'll be a terrible time oh so man this is the problem I just took it too far dark I had a funny little news story we can jump into yeah what is it and this is your TMG I'm gay the show with that song yeah yeah oh wait this is a fun one speaking of dicks um robot dicks and stuff robots to take 800 million jobs by 2030 okay how many jobs are there that's what that was my first thing I'm like that kind of just seems like everyone's job million like and it's such a specific hundred million number you know I'm saying like there's seven billion people on earth was roughly a job for each seventh person alright is there I mean that's I mean I'm just oh you're saying with this job you like kids and [ __ ] so there should be like you know something like one to one ratio or close to it for jobs no less than that yeah probably less yeah but what do you think the first like five are gonna be when do you think they replace us like when do robot casters yeah because I think all our opinions could probably be programmed definitely just take popular culture put it into like a program alright kiddies you're dope the devil dick man is real yeah ok robot that's all you need to know just repeat that [ __ ] for an hour and then popular news story yes and then you know I think you're white or racially ambiguous go yeah yeah I'm thinking 2019 that would be actually the funniest robot to make is a comedian robot it would hate itself has no money just over the open mic robot dude if it would just it would just be and it'd be funny because it would never back down it would just go to every open mic actually could be a great promise for a [ __ ] hit like a comedy movie or some [ __ ] first AI and it's a comedian yeah the worst cuz we always think about robots being like super dope yeah now just like the lowest it's like some complaining about being a robot it's just program a loser you see the [ __ ] preview for that movie downsized downsizing no what the [ __ ] is that dude crazy premise for a movie I like really cool I don't know it's got Matt Damon and someone else in it Oh [ __ ] Kirsten wig Kirsten wig some like Kristen Wiig yeah it's through a little Canadian on that get Kirsten we close are they Kirsten wig a yeah Kirsten wig a hmm Oh Kirsten wig I know me loser oh you [ __ ] duster so anyways this movie is about basically you can go through this procedure sometime in the future you can go through this procedure where you are like this big like Honey I Shrunk the kids sighs mhm right and then they have their own little communities or whatever and basically like your your money your real life size money is worth way more in these communities so it's like it's like very and it's obviously it's beneficial to the entire world because it solves like population issues hmm but it's also beneficial for you because and you get to live this like lavish lifestyle but understand the huge obviously drawback is that you're tiny and so you can really interact with like real sized humans got it and so people have to like make this decision if you're not not doing as well real life can nuts yeah it's pretty cool so much more it's so like Matt Damon does it and his wife chickens out last minute like as they both go into the room so then he basically lives this life in this small world and realizes it comes to it's like some suits or whatever reason blah blah but like I just was like damn this is [ __ ] cool as hell yeah that's deep yeah isn't it it's like one of those concepts you tell someone and they're like wow that was cool like it just happened yeah Wow interesting so much like a movie about that yeah yeah yeah pretty cool interesting mm-hmm [ __ ] drunk this weekend no no oh my god yeah I had nothing I was just thinking on the way over here I was like I was like usually I have some [ __ ] that I want to bring up that happened to me during the weekend right I proved the weekend was pretty [ __ ] chill oh you know what I did actually weed okay here's what I did I on Saturday mm-hmm I went Kelsey and I went to Whole Foods and we picked up these for lunch saturday would [ __ ] I don't know what the Whole Foods for lunch they have this alcoholic kombucha their 8% something I think I've talked about this in the [ __ ] POG ants performers like my favorite [ __ ] in the entire world yeah so I bought a couple bottles of the stuff few bottles and brought it over to Colby's place and we were drinking it and he's been talking to this chick and she's like a WWE like wrestler she's about to be who is Colby in these insane interactions he has I don't know I feel like I don't want to reveal too much about the public okay yeah so he's let's say okay well I already said his [ __ ] name so it's too late but anyways I just like he knows this girl WWE wrestler she's gonna be or some [ __ ] whatever and so she came over and like with one of her friends or something we was like drinking with them for a while and they had these gigantic vaporizers like the old kind you know I'm saying okay not the jewel like the old kind yeah and they were all glowing clouds and it was just like I don't know the whole thing was a little bit surreal like it's just like you know I don't know we're drink like a WWE person wrestle not to say she was very nice yeah and cool I would say but it's just like I don't know kind of weird did situation to be in sure I'm not friends with wrestlers so I you know I mean I don't know we need to get into that world yeah I think is what you're saying yeah definitely 100% I mean it would be I mean attitude eras over I'm not really big on wrestling but how dope would it have been like you know 10 years ago to be like yeah I'm with [ __ ] Steven Seagal and Scotty 2 hotty yeah that's a weird-ass group yeah now it's just like I'm at the phase bank so yeah mm whatever Clark gang clown gang mmm I was watching I was I was don't even say it I was watching one of phase banks cuz it was a big-ass house in the thumbnail that always gets me big-ass house is that I don't have the money to buy you want to [ __ ] house dude just just come clean yeah I'm sexually attracted to houses and so there's a big-ass house seems like we bought another house fifteen you know in the thumbnail it's like the price of the house of course fifteen million you know pesos or whatever the fluff we were gonna buy it but they rent yeah they are I don't know that's what I was wondering so like basically what it was I just fast forward it through I didn't watch it but it basically what it was is that he they're getting another house as a clan or whatever so they can have like house people that they're gonna be in their group mm-hmm like how much money do you [ __ ] and may guys make money does the faze clan make shitload off-white um gaming [ __ ] yeah merch everything it's crazy I think merch is a probably big driver so how does it work it all goes to the company and they each person gets paid out as an employee probably yeah and then they each have their own individual YouTube channels or that may go watch your money yep like it's like it's like just the old gaming syndicate model on steroids the first guy to do it was or one of the first guys to do it this guy named Jason Lake started a team called complexity I was like big [ __ ] when I was playing counter-strike okay they're sponsored by like AMD and [ __ ] they best show up to tournaments with like jerseys and all that yeah that wasn't really a thing in America so you're like holy [ __ ] they're making like $40,000 a year like salary complexity yeah such a [ __ ] gamer named dude yeah sick yeah there's a fat ass dude on that team in warden mm-hmm that's got it tight yeah that's a tight name yeah warden well me and my buddies we played against him and he was doing a pickup game and you could always run someone's steam ID and see if they were actually who they were okay so we ran in there was him and so he was playing as warden and the remaining four players like shitty players yeah and they they tagged up as complexity but they just weren't a and that fool decimated us really like you would play to rout you'd play a total of 30 rounds like best out of 30 they 16:02 us we didn't get a single round and it was just him carrying the entire team Jesus Christ that's [ __ ] wild yeah I always think about like something I think about a lot it's like the creators of video games like if you're a game designer yeah and you're like actually designing the mechanics of this game mm-hmm like someone sat down and was responsible for this entire industry you know people and money being paid out hundreds of thousands of millions of dollars in people's careers you are based around playing your game your mechanics yep and what's to say you what's to say you know the way you Crouch or whatever that could spawn off an entire separate you know saying the way to character crouches or the way it moves around or whatever there's this like this entire league lineage of a rules that are just based on you know I'm saying yeah yeah this was our concept you create a game and then what people do with the game is the entire separate thing after that yeah that's the point of creating game is that it has a mind of its own sort of it's pretty [ __ ] insane [ __ ] nuts man yeah oh speaking of games overwatch let's do it you grab five tiny riblets I grab five I'm not playing overwatch there's no [ __ ] way I don't even know how to [ __ ] play I'm not learning a new videogame I'm 27 I'm not learning a game right now cuz he got me NBA 2k 2018 got blasted didn't I haven't played yet I got I got that's one game I'm actually willing to put in the time to learn because I think it'll be fun it'll be good skill going on overwatch know what I'm gonna do with the overwatch you know I'm gonna learn a new game just like Call of Duty with them oh damn it sorry not learning a new game it was [ __ ] [ __ ] studio dude yeah it's like yo what the [ __ ] get it right yeah just once just for once please god sorry I can hear in one Honor it's pretty good guys speaking of freeing nipples check out this story man who cut off ex-girlfriend's nipple sentenced to 45 years in prison 45 doesn't seem enough to me I think a single nipple should warrant three life sentences why would you ever hack a nipple it's just so barbaric why did he cut him off I didn't read that far because I was so disgusted that he would even cut one off yeah it's pretty messed up leave the nipples alone we're trying to free them literally free the nipple yeah no no we're trying to frame him and this dudes like annexing them yeah he's like cutting it and throwing it like no not like that it's weird dude you don't enslave it you don't make it your thing oh come on with this [ __ ] shitty tech and I got a who's calling me should we pick it up on the podcast no live call hello yes Cody oh great thank you I'll come pick him up thanks bite oh yeah [ __ ] what what was that it was Tracy a buck Mason she was calling to tell me she has my genes what is buck Mason it's a store and I bought some jeans there on Saturday or Sunday that's another thing I did this weekend about genes and they hemmed them for me so now they're all prepped and ready to wear God though yeah one of those things where I'm not very good at wearing different pants sure sort of so like when I'm when I'm digging one pair of pants I wear them every single day right yeah yeah yeah yeah and that's like kind of the cornerstone of like the outfit is the pants a little bit I think that's dudes though the pants is like the foundation whatever you work around the pants yeah you don't go like all really wanna wear sure what pants look you know saying it's like Emma wear these today Billy outfit around the pants at least that's kind of the way it works for me sort of you know so I you know I really like these black jeans so I just wear them every single day yeah and so everything is based around that [ __ ] and then I never wear Matt so now I pretty much now we know there are these new ones you know I'll be ditching these and it was wearing those new pants for you know it's funny to me so months maybe even years maybe even decades so women and men look when it comes to dress like men are very pragmatic right like they start with the pants yeah women basic criticized Elena because I'm like why does it take you so long but then I realized most women have an entire retail store in their closet so it'd be like every morning you get up you're like okay I'm gonna go to class I just have to check out of H&M and I'm naked in here that is so yeah like [ __ ] I couldn't do it just too many options yeah it's true things there's just like half the clothes still have the tags on them yeah yeah when I get something I where'd that day yeah right before I came over yeah I'm sure actually no you know what I bought this I went to the Adidas store drunk on Saturday excellent with with I went with Colby and Kelsey and we just splurged sheera shop drunk no it's crazy weirdest I was like I don't go [ __ ] I'm popping tags today don't worry like [ __ ] I was like yeah well maybe maybe were unpop in a few tags come into the store the next day hi I popped Tomatoes eggs last night I got a they're like well we know yeah no you were throwing up all over the store we're on the phone if your bank right now dude someone's speaking of that somebody stole my [ __ ] credit card oh yeah yeah you got you yeah I kind of want actually I think it'd be funny to go over this at the show on Saturdays like go over like the amount of [ __ ] that they bought and like where they purchase things yeah it looks so funny I like it's like Best Buy four times in a row separate times not the online store the real store like in two days what are you hitting different Best Buy's because you're wrong they're like get suspicious that you're paying ten grand or some [ __ ] bro do oh my god when I worked at Best Buy we have some the way the way people interact with electronics is so insane to me like they love that [ __ ] we had some people at our store steal [ __ ] and it was like such an operation like they filled up a cart you know when you win a contest and you can like go through a store and grab as much [ __ ] as you want yeah that's basically what they did buncha [ __ ] in a cart and their home he pulled up like in a car outside and they like the dude and some other home he just like ran full speed to the doors like with all this momentum with all this [ __ ] in the cart so if anyone got in the way they were just like what got [ __ ] bulldozed over so my homie like he tries to grab the cart and like he like tips it or something so he gets some [ __ ] like a few Xboxes and like they get away they did of getting caught but it was just like the the amount of [ __ ] they would get away with them like and that was like 500 bucks so you can just wait two weeks yeah just figure it out yeah it's blows my mind similarly the dudes who come in and they're like yeah I just want to I want to spend 20k in home theater that's a [ __ ] car yeah Shane what are you doing yeah looks like when you have money to blow like that you don't go to Best Buy yeah no not at all never pay someone figure it out yet not [ __ ] it's just such a weird flex it's so it's a weird thing to like go to a store and buy 20k in theatres in home theater equipment don't don't you should be paying an expert to do it this way dropping 20 K what what does the guy got the wrong wires said [ __ ] I gotta [ __ ] can't hook this up twenty thousand dollars it's like a college tuition in in theatres yeah I got the wrong wires because I don't know what I'm doing so I can't hug it out what is the dollar threshold when you should just consult someone else to do that [ __ ] for you I think the five figures I think once you get to ten it's like alright we're dropping ten I'm not asides like a car like base no I'm tempted to say five I think five grand is when you're like maybe maybe I don't do this alone yeah just let someone else do this [ __ ] do like five K of like home decorating yeah house is gonna look like a [ __ ] I don't even know Picasso painting which is it comes back ticks again oh it's damnit we should do a [ __ ] update on the gay for me challenge now let me just let me just tell you what I ate in the last two days okay start off by saying it's not going very well very well for me okay everywhere very very well for me at all this is why beating today I know I had a hole I can't even speak he the tryptophan is hitting strip to fans yeah I'm trippin a fan yeah like I'm like trying to figure this out I'm like watching you die a little bit I'm trying to figure that but it is the [ __ ] turkey why would you eat that but it's also like at the end of the hour this is how I think this is how I was think about this earlier this is how it works with this podcast you start out low energy yeah I start out high interesting verses by then because by the end I'm [ __ ] tired I can't do anything you're like alright I'm just getting into it I want to go eat more tryptophan dude I'm like through the tryptophan hating sweaty when the tryptophan his be like fam when that tryptophan is just saying 5k some about an expert okay for me challenge okay yeah just ate a whole Thanksgiving meal this morning for breakfast I had bread pudding which is about six pounds this little thing of bread pudding tells he got me for my birthday because she knows I love bread pudding and this this this was like nine loaves of bread condensed into just a cupcake cupcake sized thing I want to like I feel like I got diabetes I need to cut off my foot just thinking about eating that I had a corner like this big and I was full it was insane so that's what I had last night I had bread pudding you know I had Tobin Jaco Bell I had chick-fil-a burn brown and what did I have earlier probably more bread pudding Oh a Thanksgiving meal getting it with some but it was something probably equally as bad yeah yeah just not a oh I had [ __ ] huckleberries a brunch place in Santa Monica yeah right right biscuit turned up so it's not really going well for me guys but I hit think I'm gonna get back into it okay yeah I'm gonna cuz I went to the gym yesterday so I'm still like not totally off the way right yeah so we'll see yeah I've been uh how's it going how's it going for you I mean steady yeah yeah I'm building strength yeah getting nice and good nice yeah and slowly but surely how many ways have been now for a whole month in the four or five or five well I mean since I started but since we talked about it maybe like two three weeks damn yeah I mean I'm definitely not froggit progress pics uh probably not no probably not probably not we're gonna hype it up and then we're gonna show what we look like no one's gonna be like did you guys do anything yeah yeah I'm trying to figure out where the which was the before picture yeah this is this is where our is no well before your the after I just don't I don't get it oh we have cracked an hour we have but we oh we oh the fans you see this guy's I always am here to give you more at the end Hey I hopped in the discord for a few minutes yeah that was fun shout out to do to ten folks I touched up with I want in the voice channel on that [ __ ] yeah so the discord is like it's it's made for gaming so there's like once you enter a voice Channel it's basically you just like talk to people that are also in the voice channel so it's like you know it's like a big group Skype call order the [ __ ] you however you want it's awesome really yeah yeah it's awesome but it's also really just scary I jumped in there was a good it was good there were like some one person was freestyling I was like yeah this is I'm out I can't I don't know why I just overwhelming it's got too much stimulus cuz I went in at at a moment were like we were right about to start a movie and I was like what's this and I just clicked on it I got you know a bombarded by voices yeah what's up what's up what's up and I'm like good and I didn't wanna be rude and be like all right I'm leaving sure so it's kinda like what's up with you guys they're like ooh there's like oh [ __ ] okay I'm gonna go watch a movie got it silence so yeah you came in on tryptophan doubt he's got [ __ ] rekt yeah you got to hi I came to the party yeah party yeah I hung out we were chilling I was roasting yeah cooking cooking the boy dad for free little bit yeah a little bit dude I have 50 cameos to do got ten yeah it's a cameos I just feel like I wanted what the goddamn it on the answer on the thing it's Spock Oh Spock's him over yeah he's gonna hang out for a second oh really yeah why shoot yeah probably some stunt vlog it up long enough yeah let's get him on the pod for a little bit yeah we know if I'm like oh I knew it we don't know Janice so I think I think what I do want to talk about for a second mixtape mixtape yeah we finished it last night we finished finished well maybe yeah it's in it's in a state ready to be really well we can release it right now and be great like we have to polish it up we still might even do one more song but probably not probably not and the song we did last night is a slap-happy banger dude no no I'm just I would want to say I'm very excited to put this out yeah me too yeah it's something I think you guys are gonna like it yeah I'm very pleased with it I'm just gonna keep saying um I mean the song that I said dinger yeah it's a ding-a-ling it tickles of course in that one yeah I was at the at the meeting at fullscreen today there was like nine people in this meeting for some reason and they were working on I was like oh we're doing an EP and they were like all like what Oh rap music you're a position I'm like no let's get this listen to it now my producer is a musician a magician on magician I can't speak dude yeah the chirps of fans really hit you know I have farewell virgin [Music] I'm searching the depths of my brain for an insanely dark thing why I don't know that you don't have to make it dark Oh what what oh don't know we're good we're good we're good we're good [Music] have you guys been playing [ __ ] to HQ have you been playing no oh it's so dope man I have not been playing HQ it's so dope the show this Saturday should we do stand-up no no I mean it's gonna be weird if we like just do standing up and then at the end of our sets we just sit down thank you for watching our sets what you guys think you guys think about that ya know think about the live show it's just gonna be this but with a hundred people right they're not laughing just like right now she's sitting there like this is just as disarray well yeah well I'm thinking like we just make it about ourselves like tell stories and stuff like the one ya like that Bed Bath & Beyond story is great actually precious save that well no it's actually a little bit dark but sooo funny stories yeah I got some funny ones yeah me too any ones in the can um so yeah an exampie over the last show I think hey Ashley let's keep we should queue up a name that time you for the next episode yeah okay everybody everybody go hit Cody no no no you know what you got to do let's post in the patreon community section yeah yeah yeah it's because we have there's actually been some funny [ __ ] in there and we haven't really talked about it I was just I wanna know so I want sure you already have it already have a [ __ ] loaded up the discord memes have been 10 out of 10 I've been laughing a good number at those got some good chucks yeah those Cody why don't you squeak it Noel like you squeak at Kelsey when she makes a joke what the a week like that I don't think I do that do I if whatever he does for Kelsey I don't want him to do you mean let's just draw that line right there through editor so I'm listening to the latest episode of the TMZ podcast and I hear them talking about Russ and I really wonder if they know that he literally has a song about cheating on his girl where he doesn't even feel room for it Oh exactly I don't know how that's supposed to elevate a female's mind but all right rust wait let's talk about this because after we posted that video yeah a bunch of people what first of all like no jumper retweeted it like yeah people in hip-hop like um what's the guy's name [ __ ] ray Volpe I think like retweeted it yeah people in music we're like ah this is really funny yeah it's giving a recognition yeah and people were tagging him in it yeah and then the next corner yeah oh yeah that's a little bit of fun fact here wait so the next morning he tweets I have a picture of it like now I don't know if this was directed at me or not but people were tagging me he goes around remember things could always be worse you could be living in North Hollywood making IG skits trying to get Klout tokens as a grown-ass man Wow now I don't know if that was about me or not but um and I'm not saying it might have been all I'm saying is that like when people started tagging me he did we did it immediately which is hilarious because I think we hurt his feelings a little bit yeah I think we got him yep I think we - I think we touched him up yep then the Floyd Mayweather so funny dude I was like I one of the guys in the meeting today was like dude your breast video hilarious adds a [ __ ] clown what I love is that all his fans keep coming at us like dude you just spoke out against drugs and it's like that has nothing to do with it Oh Spock's here keep it going well that's really weird some girls says bring back that screw or now some girl says for the three episode can you guys bring Spock on for a little bit thank you what's good what's go Chee what's good she just just sit in just sit in for a second actually here I want to ask you about this because I might sew on my podcast that I recorded on Tuesday I was I was talking about with my girlfriend about vegan stuff what are we talking about this yesterday no okay so like basically I was like I tried it basically just a you I have this weird basically I'm like you shouldn't eat chicken flavored things if you're a vegan that was my thing and I was like I don't actually believe that I was I don't know anything that's funny animal flavored [ __ ] when they don't believe in eating animals like I don't eat human flavored thing to do that I don't believe in eating people you know I'm saying yeah I can I think I kind of agree actually oh I got so hate in the comments pretty well I mean the thing is like if you I think it maybe depends on the reason why you're vegan mm-hmm like if you're vegan just because it's like the health benefits or whatever then yeah it doesn't really matter yeah but if you're vegan for like or environmental reasons I guess it wouldn't matter either but if you're vegan cuz like you don't like eating animals then that's probably kind of [ __ ] yeah maybe I mean like even even if it's for environmental things yeah don't you think like having even just like I guess like the socio-economic effects of having the word chicken listed at a grocery store yeah like keeps the awareness of chicken being a thing that's edible that other people should be eating even if you don't believe in your chicken but our chicken flavored [ __ ] what is that like I don't know you know I never even thought about that again I don't exercise so if you're vegan and you're about to hate on me right now I got enough hate on my podcast okay I don't actually believe it I'm just kind of being devil's advocate and just like saying this and I know I'm not informed okay I know that a bunch people were like Kody I love you but you know what the [ __ ] you're talking about okay I know that that's most things honestly yeah I never even thought about that well cuz like I [ __ ] like fake chicken [ __ ] but it's like you eat you eat fake chicken [ __ ] check out fake chicken [ __ ] yeah mentally [ __ ] about the tweet yeah we did so I don't know maybe maybe it was about us maybe wasn't who nervous hotseat back at you hey what do you think of the song we made last night it was it was it hi I gotta say that [ __ ] certified [ __ ] bangers you guys are not ready for the TMZ mixtape yep dingers co-signed on Spock alright guys no you you oh I'm v what you owe them fire the people know the people we owe it to them okay at least five gotcha alright well no the rest thing I would just want to finish this point I think it's funny so all of Russia's fans that defend him yeah are art like just they have his personality yeah they can't see that being good at your craft and being an [ __ ] are not mutually exclusive yeah I just have to say okay Russ good at his craft kind of a dingus in real life yeah Kevin Spacey amazing us craft [ __ ] kids Yeah right [ __ ] yeah yeah this is you guys this is the same not really the same thing obviously because Russ hasn't sexually harassed anyone else like you know being like yeah your what about Kevin Spacey I mean he's like he's like touch kids it's not like that it's like yeah yeah but come on dude house of cards [ __ ] rules people so get so many comments of people being like yo I think Russ makes [ __ ] bangers but this is funny yeah yeah like the dude just has to it would be awesome if Russ was just like one day realize like I'm bit of a dingus I just admitted it then he'd be cool as [ __ ] he'd be very cool if he was like I want to hear this song he's got about him cheating on his girl have your dad no no we should listen to that and I'd people are like Oh Russ his music is amazing I don't know dawg the few songs I've heard from him I'm a little bit like weren't we're really yeah I don't I'll [ __ ] with him and they're like oh he mixed and mastered and produce itself um I guess I was like it yeah it sounds like it doesn't have a lot of input you can tell and like a group of people work on something it turns out a little bit better you know I can hear Southside and Metro touch of beat your house yeah this is gonna be a [ __ ] dinner yeah certified slap-happy 'danger yeah but if you hear [ __ ] Noel Miller on the beat you're like maybe just stick to podcast yeah right yeah well mail her on to me I know well you want to come outside I love that watermark I imagine he liked Mike too that like someone was actually asking him to come outside yeah he was like mom I'm making a and just went back to make him but yeah he's like wait that's it that's the tag we should just steal it his yeah the exact one hey yeah replace it with our names abruptly put that all over the mixtape the other funny comments we got I think Russ just makes all these music about women because he truthfully doesn't give a [ __ ] about them about women yeah yeah it actually doesn't respect women had all the complete yeah the complete opposite overcompensating yeah it would humble raise my estates and this and that cuz [ __ ] them they're stupid yeah women need their mindset elevated because they're dumb that's why I'm here take you from dumb to normal he's like Taylor Swift he just dates women so that he can use that as far as material lyrics yeah I mean yeah ooh 2018 predictions who do you think Taylor Swift is gonna [ __ ] poison who do you think she's gonna poison yeah just next targets she's like it's like the Scorpion King scorpion Queen I think I think I think Russ is at home praying he gets cheated on I think Taylor Swift's gonna get Charlie puth next year I think he's on the [ __ ] list I'm gonna nail him yep and Charlie puth and then I think she's gonna hit ed Sheeran what's a charlie people you know Ed Sheeran's the top most listened-to person on Spotify yeah he's got like 400 billion plays or some extremely family-friendly it's it's it's also just great that's a whole nother level of famous right that is yeah but she kills most famous person in the world probably yeah you'd only be that famous with kind of you know non opinions like all his music he's got some opinions in there [Music] yeah it was olive no Kankakee and stop the beaten egg and show your feet ding-ding-ding damn sorry bro wha alright wrapping this up dude you know I know stop trying to keep it going when I read when I was one of the comments if you think the tryptophan hit him too hard I just owe you I'll take a rest here how about this who keep going I'll take a nap I'll take a nap okay so what's up everybody I'm here to complain about God knows what oh here's something carrots they're good you can have my seat he's gonna sleep he's really tagging Holly this has just turned into a WWF vodcast Cody hold on Cody's really gonna take a nap right now all right [Laughter] Spock on dude I like the mobile setup here this is dope dope feel like a DJ yeah okay so I don't know what the podcast it was but you were talking about how Cody's Cody used to leave out [ __ ] carrots and yeah oh yeah this is a reindeer yeah no this is a follower yeah to the oats story yeah so whitest thing ever Alerts right right now all right as a kid I was probably six or seven years old my sister was probably four or five and we were in the backseat of the car and we were like arguing with each other and my mom's and the might like stepdad was driving probably and my mom's in the passenger seat she turns around and my sister like fighting she's like no you guys better stop and it was it was around as like December I was like you guys better stop fighting I'm gonna call Santa that's like my sister's look teacher really I think we still we kept going because she called Santa my sister sitting back there like oh like this is real and she's she's on the phone like yeah hey I don't know what she said dude but it's like hey Santa yeah don't bring that many presents this year whatever the [ __ ] it was dude and I remembered like talking to my sister later and just like how did mom get Santa's number on top of this kind of a funny story I was probably in third grade and my dad is when I found out Santa wasn't real oh [ __ ] and my dad goes I came home from school one day I don't know what it was I don't even think it was around Christmas time I was just sitting there and my dad just turns around and goes hey you know Santa's not real right no way yeah it was like really a bomb got dropped and I talked and it was like it was so weird cuz how I remember it it was in my head it was like August or some [ __ ] because I remember I came home from school and he just dropped it on me and I was like what the [ __ ] and I talked him I talked to him about it like probably last year and he was like no no it was cuz uh like kids at school kept you kept getting like bullied or something and I was like dude there's no way I was in like third grade now you missed that oh there's no definitely made yeah I don't even I don't know it was like stoned or something you know Santa's not real right and real right yeah boy now I do it I have some white Christmas stories that's hilarious because there's one more with my dad I remember like waking up in the middle of the night yeah and hearing Santa laugh no and I was like and I remember because me and my sister had it like shared a bedroom when we were little and I we both what to look to each other we all foxy us out there we went to sleep stop it I'm serious no I think my dad went downstairs I think it was one there was no downstairs so it was just one dude and he and he ho ho he like laughing ho ho ho yeah just because it just sets an alarm at 3:00 in the morning he's like goes in the living room starts unloading [ __ ] that's why he told you cuz he was thinking about it he's planning ahead Babs probably boxing up the Santa outfit he's like I'm not doing this [ __ ] I'm not doing this [ __ ] no more [ __ ] off with this yo I'm gonna make the thumbnail to this special guest and it's just gonna be in Spock in both seats I just had to share that [ __ ] cuz cuz I dude I listen to the podcast I told you guys but it's a good pot guys you have it yeah yeah I told her well cuz I travel so I was telling you on your podcast I always just put that [ __ ] on on airplanes and [ __ ] nice bro ya all asleep to it yeah it's a good one actually don't I don't I've listened to yours I listened to dobrik so I was into the codis by itself I've listened to those but I'll put on like some [ __ ] when I don't care about what I'm sure what I want to pass out so this one yes or this yeah anyways alright well dang here do the tell them bike oh [ __ ] we're good we got a winner who I'm in dude well this this [ __ ] festive episode actually turned out alright yeah this one's a dinger - look show this Saturday December second mixtape December 15th load your [ __ ] ears up get loads your load you'll get your Walkman right hit your Walkman ready get your [ __ ] boom box ready to go buy some blank CDs you're gonna want to burn this [ __ ] down you're on downtown ok under local streets [ __ ] that [ __ ] out fish it's about a ding dang you're gonna feel like you're your dinger hit the toilet water yeah you're about to get hing dinged right in your little hum domed and some Zoomer do wait real quick me and my buddy narrated Floyd versed Pacquiao in like 1950s boxers voices and that's all I'm thinking about guys we were just being exceptionally crass but is a big China comes in with a big left hit the zinger wops him in a mop in him like half the thing I was [ __ ] so stupid anyway yeah and any plugs now go follow Spock yeah that's it that's it shout tiny gang shout tryptophan say see you next week we are gay

Channel: TMG Studios

Views: 464,806

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Id: -CKkIIz0Gec

Length: 83min 50sec (5030 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 08 2017