Dungeon Masters Share Their Surprising Moments (r/AskReddit)

Dungeon Master's of Reddit what is the most surprising thing your players have done in game the entire party was about to die until they rolled to see if a player's weasel familiar could remove the cork from a health potion and pour it into the Wizards mouth he couldn't they all lived i had a player wish for himself to be turned into a stone block he'd been sent back in time somehow I forget exactly how as this game happened in 1996 and was trying to find her way back so he figured he could stand where the party was when he got sent back in time wish himself to be turned into a stone block with a message chiseled on it read English for me to be turned into character named his logic was they'd find the stone block waiting on their approach and his character would use his wish to change him back before being sent back in time so I did that then I said to him why didn't you just wish to go back to your own time he said oh I didn't think of that and he was duly laughed at by everyone my players tend to do some ridiculous stuff to the point where I could probably fill an entire thread with their shenanigans but the first and best would probably have to be weaponizing butter during the first session the party found themselves in a small town library trying to figure out what's going on among other things they found a book with 1,001 uses for butter just as a throwaway detail they check it out as well and I think nothing of it after the session I asked for downtime actions in the party's mad scientist comes to me and says I want to make explosive butter I have him roll for it and he aces it he then posts a picture to our Facebook group along the lines of chicken and stick of butter equals chicken shaped blast shadow and cook chicken the rest of the group runs with us and it leads to another increasing spiral of butter related weaponry and paraphernalia buying a cow to secure their own supply and hiding it in their basement adding some herbs and spices to the mix and creating the basting grenade after building a BPG a different player took a skill specialty in food based weaponry this of course deserved an equally weird response in kind see this kind of abuse of butter didn't go unnoticed namely by the butter deity herself Dean she waited to campaign of harassment against the party for infringing on her domain eventually culminating in summoning a skyscraper sized sentient corn-on-the-cob to crush them in the lore of this world butter is now a highly controlled substance in the French have become the most formidable military power in the world even when telling non butter related stories from this game I can only ever refer to it as butter game session one first sessional lovers have ran in save my daughter says the sad villager okay says the party goes through the dungeon sees girl i fire built her me what what yup the girl was an illusion and the mission was a trick to get the party to unearth an ancient evil they figured out one half the girl was a trick still on earth be evil but the whole party including myself was very surprised to see the Coward sorcerer shoot a fire built at a child instead of the skeleton boss they turned the game into SimCity PCs are thrown in into a dungeon for witchcraft get broken out by an agent of the king who knows they are innocent wants them to take down the guy who's going around accusing anyone he considers impure of witchcraft the cause he's cleaning up the kingdom he has the support of a lot of nobles who are bigoted freaks that's why the throne contact to openly against him and decides to employ the PCs if they kill him everyone will just assume it's out of revenge Kings agent basically gives them directions to where they can find this guy that they get caught up on the detail of some of the nobles being in with him and decide they want more details they asked for an example I throw out the name Lord Hobbes at random and now the quest is suddenly investigate Lord Hobbes for corruption while completely ignoring the guy who is actually responsible for all of this so now I need to make a map of Hobbes mansion and grounds for them to infiltrate stat out guards and such and invent something to happen turns out Hobbes is being blackmailed into compliance and isn't that bad a guy he tries to hire the PCs himself to go after which finder douchebag so I can get things back on Rails and then just to tie off this plot cul-de-sac of the witch finders agents kills him pcs finally go after the guy they were supposed to go after save the day and as a reward I have the King give them Hobbes title and mansion so I can reuse a nice map I made as their base and all seems well of course now they are technically the rulers of a small town immediately this becomes their primary focus ignoring any and all other plot hooks they want to improve the town which I now also need to map in detail invest money collect taxes pass ordinances improve trade routes etc adventuring is now just a way to acquire funds and defeat threats to the town which starts growing at an alarming rate gaming sessions are now 70% discussions on trade revenue allocation and fiddling with the town map in one of my campaigns we had a knight who relied on mounted combat to be effective he told me after creating his character that he had a contingency plan should his horse die and all the details his character came with a buff and mute on a renamed Patsey and a little [ __ ] whose name as far as anyone knew was qui I was hesitant to add so many characters but since one was mute I allowed it eventually his horse is killed and he turns aside I to me and goes I activate the contingency plan all the other players are so confused and dying laughing as he begins to execute his backup he pulls a backpack harness out of one of his packs and straps it onto patsies back then climbs in and grabs his Lance and he yells yah Patsey he practically piggybacks the rest of the game in order to get his mounted combat bonus one of the other players asked his patsy okay with this and he responded Patsy has long dreamed of this day tell me Patsy was clacking coconuts together the whole time their very first quest was find out where the dwarfs have gone one year of weekly gaming later five years in-game the dumb Frick finally decided to see where the dwarfs went they were in the mountains they were always in the goddamn mountains recently they were sneaking through a goblin nest too when the ranger felt the foot of a sleeping goblin gently rest against her it was meant to warn the players that the hollows surrounding them were filled with goblins and that they should continue to be careful she said I reach out with both hands and choke it to death dart wow what a high road later the rest of the group see the Ranger do this and proceeded to pull boned daggers and other small weapons and follow suit now they are crawling in and out of dirt holes murdering sleeping goblins left and right normally their roles are cursed but not this time nolo roles several natural twenties and a few minutes later they have brutally murdered 50 goblins and are covered from head to toe in blood high-fiving each other for being the good guys one of the early plot hooks was an excommunicated priest having a vision of an angry bear guarding a cave they got into a debate reminiscent of the swallow coconut debates and Monty Python about whether a bear can properly be said to be angry they eventually decided to look for the bear not to investigate the vision but to see what an angry bear looks like how a DM always did custom campaigns there would be special items made up by him and he would make unique classes for each other's to play he was really good at it and our group played for years and had some awesome adventures one time I was leaning a little too hard into my chaotic evil side and long story short my team sold me to a group of devils from one of the claims of heck they took me to this ancient relic thing that would transform me into a being of heck what I got was based on my role from a percentage died so out of 101 percent - 95 percent being terrible 96% - 100 percent being I might get something good I had a one-time-use item where I could pick my role some mystic scroll about deciding fates so I chose 100% the DM turned me into a fallen Archangel boys Oh boys did I knock that campaign off-course when I showed back up I would like to sniff the door handle you don't detect anything unusual I would like to lick the door handle it tastes like regret the party had to fight a powerful maro that had a talisman they needed instead of fighting him they tricked him into marrying a baboon that they polymorphed into a beautiful mermaid getting the talisman in exchange it was so absurd that I had to go along with it nobody can say no to good tale they driven a brother duo of Dwarfs from town really do gir in disguise then they decided that instead of following up on my elaborate plans for an under doubt conspiracy campaign that would instead fight the City Council over the dwarf brothers abandoned Forge so that they could work an elaborate real estate scheme I'm trying to figure out which under dark race would make the best realtors in an attempt to get the campaign back on track rather than kill some hired thug that attacked them they subdued him tied him up and questioned him they gave him a name jimothy and let him go telling him that he was a good strong lad who'd be better suited to a job in construction than this murdering business I threw in a cameo of him later happy in his new job via a combination of spells alchemy and teamwork they enlarged the wizard's raven familiar shrunk the gnome glued the gnome to the Raven and had the Raven fly along city walls while the gnome logged spells of the guards my players once pulled all of their cash at about level 4 to buy our tavern and retire instead of following the plot any further that was it campaign over they decided to play medieval fantasy it's always sunny Claire I cast death spell any great do you target the cultists winging the golden ritual sickle or the one holding the screaming baby Claire I target the baby me can't sacrifice a living infant if the infant is dead guys got a solid plan tbh failed the simplest puzzle I have ever made instead choosing to trial and error their way across a floor covered in pressure plates I had a campaign lost for two years once the world I had created called ad regal have been cursed with an undead plague by the god of the dead as a sort of loophole to grow more powerful than his deity brethren the curse didn't old though and the PCs saw humankind returned to normal except for them they remained Undead and since they existed in a state of neither living nor dead they soon realized that they were the only ones who could stop this from ever happening again we had friends come and go dear NPC's died pcs grew stronger and closer we had funny moments and sad moments moments of dire frustration and confusion we had invested hours of our lives getting to know these characters then the day came having slain death itself they had one loose end to tie up a void dragon threatening to assimilate the Material Plane with the ethereal plane it was quite literally a battle of gods and I remember it like it was yesterday the battle was hard-fought and most of the level 16 party was down to single digit HP once the beast was dead having dispatched the universe's greatest foe in his own domain all that was left was to go back home but there is a catch the portal back to the Material Plane can only be held open from the ethereal side one of them had to stay back at this point I'm getting choked up even though I had planned this for more than two years the only female in our party starts to cry then all the guys lose it our withered Oracle cedar speaks up and says he will do it having seen a prophecy of sacrifice early in the campaign he thought it was destiny the room falls silent then our rogue speaks up I don't know about everyone else bilis cedar isn't coming then back there the Material Plane isn't much of a home at all I am like galling at this point in the end the saviors of the universe chose rather to be banished from their homeworld forever to be trapped in the ethereal plane than to abandon one of their friends as the portal slowly closed and they watched their dimension slowly sink out of view our bard flipped a coin through the crack in reality it was like a thing for him to flick a coin at anyone he had saved helped we are playing another campaign now set in the same world and as long as I live as long as ad Regal exists if you look up to the northern sky on a clear night you just might be able to make out the faint glimmer of a golden star sailors and navigators often use it for travelin purposes and it goes by many names most call it the token of Heroes though Star Wars game gambler gets shot medic fails his role and declares him dead party makes their escape leaving his body i telled player to make a new character he isn't dead but he will be out until they can do a rescue he grins not dead we need some alone time eight daikon and force point equals new Imperial Intelligence agent he spent the next year screwing the group and the Alliance from the inside he took being left behind super personally when the party figured out the source of all the crappy luck I thought he was going to die laughing they were all so mad I gave my players a little more free will than a typical story arc just to see what would happen they inevitably went evil rank sacking every town becoming a roving band of bandits torturing key NPC's for info when they got to a major city they couldn't walk through the main gate because of the bad reputation they gained so they snuck in took the king hostage and launched him over the walls from a catapult claiming the city when they finally met the main antagonist of my story arc instead of killing the Dark Lord the Dark Lord joined the party because the party gained an incredibly evil reputation it was a hilarious story arc I want to gouge out his eye you don't have a weapon on you I'll use my thumb sai role for unarmed I guess they became obsessed with a random loom I threw in as flavell text our sort crit failed his Arcana check on it which convinced him that it was the Loom of great portent demonic rites were performed on it to help them make decisions and carted it around everywhere they went they started a band called the Lumineers their secret society was called the Illuminati the Fellowship of the loom to outsiders loom puns for days we sell games dow sells out of our DMS attempt to kill us all off wandered into to say us Mobius one of the chaotic evil deities someone's castle at about level four one of our party was running chaotic evil and so was trying to get us all killed rest of us were some combination of lawful good and neutral we're wandering through the house trying to find something when we accidentally stumbled into us mo Deus himself our chaotic evil friend had met with him previously to try to hand us over to him to kill so we are trying not to die in one of our party the mage decides to try the old Goku trick no see we're really weak right now so if you let us go and train and come back stronger it'll be much more fun for you it'll take more than just a look to kill us DM tells him to roll persuasion with disadvantage natural 20 on the first roll natural 20 on the second roll we walked out alive left the chaotic evil IDIA there to die and never went back I was deeming for my mom and grandma they got hungry and butchered and ate two Hobgoblin I was so shocked I had no idea how to react I guess technically it's not cannibalism for an elf and a half elf to eat a Hobgoblin it was only surprising the first time but I had a friend who always played a cleric every single time his character would buy the largest mound he could get an elephant usually then he'd ride it to death make dry rations from its meat animate it fit it with heavy budding and travel around and comfort from inside its now padded rib cage basically a cross between an RV and a tank the party discovered an ancient ruin containing a massive relic that could open portals to other planes the idea being it was like the castle in Mario 64 and they'd have various dimensional adventures while discovering the disturbing secrets within the ruins here's what actually happened one open a portal to the plane of alcohol to build a pipeline out of the plane of alcohol 3 set up a distribution center for take over the national alcohol market by undercutting competition thanks to their low cost of supply 5 establish a monopoly on all liquor great then got weird six defeat an evil Alchemist experimenting with undies seven discover his formulas to turn living people into mindless Undead eight put the formula into the alcohol supply nine acquire an army of undead alcoholics ten use the army to fight the frickin Lich that they ignored for the whole goddamn campaign my players one time managed to totally miss the huge fire elemental on guard as they flew into a valley after a successfully snuck up on them the Bard revealed he spoke Eggman and managed to befriend it during an adventure to an elven city one of my players started a sundial wristwatches pyramid scheme sub managed to pull it off with high charisma roles now it's a running joke throughout the campaign everywhere the party goes is a sales opportunity for sundial wristwatches inspiration to us all not sure if my DM will see this threat so I can tell the story from a player's perspective we were running curse off stride and we were nearing the end we were in the final castle and had found a teleporter type magic device with a bunch of predetermined destinations based on small gems and cryptic hints it's based on the hints we had narrowed down that there are two possible options that would take us directly to strut tomb well he would have the drop on him we were basically decided when I the druid decided to read way too much into the other clue I made a long overly interpretive argument for why it was the other one and I genuinely thought it was I had all but one party member convinced but since we voted on it he went along with us we made our choice diem asked sea ashore never a good sign he sighs and I see him turned back many many pages in the Strad book we were running through we essentially teleported to the other side of the world the campaign takes place in a small region but we literally could not have been further from where we previously were and not only that but we teleported to the end of a dungeon so we had to do it backwards we are standing outside the final bathroom and we accidentally extended the campaign another two months because I thought I was the only one clever enough to Ravel a hint that wasn't nearly as cryptic as I thought one of our players made a huge point about not wanting to hurt kids they were on an assassination mission but told not to stir up politics well they got their killed a few guards then stumbled into a little kids room he wasn't older than five they made sure he was safe and okay and then left him in the room finally they found the Lord's room inside he and several of his house servers were killed with a political rivals name carved in their foreheads their best short notice plan was to cut all their heads off and burn the place down no one remembered the kid until the next session hard guilt was had all around this is Diamond Sponge Bob he only appears every 200,000 videos subscribe for good luck if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video or don't either way have a great day you magnificent people

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 235,244

Rating: 4.9094253 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh, dungeons & dragons, dungeon master, d&d story, dnd stories reddit, role playing

Id: 2bB30OCu9MI

Length: 20min 31sec (1231 seconds)

Published: Mon Oct 07 2019