Does the Narcissist Miss You After No Contact?

[Music] does the narcissist miss you after no contact an article by Kim Sayid find Kim's blog at let me reach calm multitudes of people who have implemented no contact with their narcissistic partner will inevitably ask the question does the narcissist miss me why because they are often consumed with missing the narcissist and they wonder if he or she has the same feelings of loss and sorrow perhaps wondering if there's a chance to rekindle the relationship the short yet excruciating answer is no when we wonder if or assume that the narcissist misses us we are projecting our feelings of loss and longing onto them narcissists do not think the way we do nor experience the same emotions they operate solely from ego so the usual emotions of missing someone or feelings of sadness and regret typically don't affect them following are the most common stages emotional and physical a narcissist goes through when one has implemented no contact these are not listed in order of rank these stages are for reference and can manifest in any order depending on the individual one anger when you've implemented no contact with a narcissist the first emotion they feel is anger at your attempt to set a boundary they've grown so accustomed to having you under their control that they become indignant when you choose to have an independent thought and act on it during the relationship you became an extension of them so when you begin to break away and reclaim your conscious thought process they typically go into a rage although this isn't always obvious oftentimes they'll conceal the rage in order to fulfill their devastating revenge motives to the silent treatment in the narcissist mind you are still their property and they believe it's just a matter of time before you come to your senses therefore a common tactic is for them to execute the silent treatment this might seem counterintuitive at first but the truth is that many people do not implement no contact in its true form and they often leave their phone email and social networks open in case the narcissist tries to contact them then when the victim doesn't receive any form of contact from the narcissist they begin to think the breakup may possibly have been their fault after all in an ironic twist of events the victim who implemented no contact then feels rejected by the narcissist and will often contact the NARC with a text or Facebook message oddly the silent treatment from the narcissist then results in the victim asking their abuser to come back to them three hoovering hoovering presents in many forms mostly it's a narcissist sending little tacks showing up at your door with flowers coming to you because they've had a life-changing epiphany where through divine intervention they've been shown the pain and sorrow they put you through and promise to change allow me to break it down for you using a typical hoovering attempt by a male narcissist scenario the narcissist sends you attacks and shows up with flowers 20 minutes later you crack the door and he tells you that he loves you and doesn't want anyone else he manages to squeeze out a tear or two and admits that he hasn't been perfect but he's willing to try to change for the sake of the relationship your internal dialogue he must really care about me he's finally seen the error of his ways and he's obviously sorry for the way he treated me all this time thank goodness this is great I forgive him and I love him more than ever you opened the door and throw your arms around him his internal dialogue damn those flowers were friggin expensive why am i doing all this hard work oh yeah finding a new supply would cost more than the flowers while with dinner and dates and such I guess I'm getting off pretty cheaply here I can't believe she's falling for this again but oh man is she gonna pay for doing this no contact thing he forces a smile and returns the hug which doesn't seem as genuine as yours for the torn lover he's already shacked up with a new mistress whom he says he just met but in reality had been seeing for the past few months behind her back he tells you he was so lonely when you implemented no contact that he defenselessly fell into the arms of a new lover but he still somehow loves you and wants to make it work the scoop what's happened is he found out that the new lover doesn't have as much money as he thought can't support him and org gave a little lip when he tried to test out the boundary breaking waters or maybe he just needs to get in a good D value and discard before leaving you in a heap of raw nerves on your living room floor whenever a new lover enters the scene who isn't really new don't fall for the torn between two lovers act you are being played and triangulated and you should consider going full out no kontakt-5 Jekyll and Hyde if he's really sociopathic once you fall for that feigned remorse and let him in he immediately drops the mask and makes you pay for implementing no contact this could be in the form of a verbal assault or physical if the latter happens call the police at your first opportunity there's only more to come what he really misses he misses having someone take complete care of him the special treatment he misses not being able to be himself he can't do that with the new supply he misses not having someone to take his frustrations out on he misses having someone to mop off his stage all while paying his bills he misses having an adoring compliant partner he misses being God he misses not having adult responsibilities as you can see all of the above have nothing to do with missing you and everything to do with the narcissist it's all about their ego entitlement and having control these are the only things that make up the narcissists inner self when you implement no contact it's the ultimate form of narcissistic injury and they'll do whatever is necessary to gain back control and then devalue and discard you that's why implementing no contact in its true form is critical when detaching from a toxic emotionally abusive partner remember those points of entry from number 2 don't leave them open you will only regret it in the end for more articles from Kim Sayid and more information on healing from narcissistic abuse please visit Kim's website let me reach calm or her Facebook page let me reach with Kim Sayid and of course click subscribe to the YouTube channel for more videos like this you may also enjoy Kim's book how did you know contact like a boss written by kim saeed and narrated by me Stephanie Murphy you can find how to do no contact like a boss on Amazon iTunes and audible.com

Channel: Kim Saeed

Views: 1,421,896

Rating: 4.8426085 out of 5

Keywords: No Contact, Narcissistic Abuse, Leaving a Narcissist, narcissistic abuse recovery, narcissist relationship breakup, how to get over a narcissist, after narcissistic abuse, heal from narcissistic abuse

Id: vEJFsg0net8

Length: 7min 15sec (435 seconds)

Published: Mon Jan 02 2017