Cut Him Off And He Will Miss You... Is This True?

if you cut contact with him or you stop talking to him you stop texting him you go no contact or let's say you just give him some space will he miss you and if he doesn't what can you do about it or if you're not in a situation where he would miss you what can you do about it hello my name is matthew coast and today we're going to be talking about whether he'll miss you or not if you cut contact with him and i'll share a technique for making a man more attracted to you while doing less work that would be nice wouldn't it i'll also share a text message that you can send to him that has a 98 response rate so most women that send this to him the overwhelming majority get a response back even a lot of times when the guy doesn't even like her so he might not like you and you can send him this text and he'll still respond back to you almost guaranteed almost guaranteed and so let's get started here will he miss you so the real question about whether he'll miss you if you cut contact or not is how much does he like you and so the more that he likes you the more likely he is to miss you no matter what no matter how much time you've spent together no matter what you've done together no matter how much invested he is if he likes you if he really really is attracted to you if he really likes you then he'll miss you and the less that he likes you the less likely he is to miss you no matter what you've done together no matter how much you've hung out with each other if he doesn't have a high level of interest then he probably won't miss you right if his interest level is really really low and so what can you do about it really the first question that you should ask yourself is should you do something about it so hear me out on this one so how low is his level of attraction and interest in you and you can really tell a man's i i've got videos about this but you can really tell a man's interest level more than anything else by how much he's investing in you how much he's pursuing you how much he's calling you how much he's trying to hang out with you how much he's willing to cancel plans to hang out with you how much he's willing to go out of his way in order to be with you and so the higher his interest level is the more likely he is to miss you and the lower it is the less likely is right and so if his attraction level is really really low and his investment level is really really low then cutting off contact with him isn't going to matter because he's probably going to disappear anyway right and if it's really that low there might not be anything that you can really do about it anyway because there has to be a certain level like there's a lot that we talk about in the dating advice community about kind of making a man miss you or making a man fall in love with you but if a guy has absolutely no feelings for you it's pretty much a lost cause he has to have some kind of emotional connection and investment and interest in you in order to build it and grow it if there's nothing there you you can't build and grow right it's like trying to start a fire when there's no wood right you can't start a fire if there's nothing there to start with there has to be something there initially if you want to build and grow that fire and so the question is you know what's his level of attraction and how invested is he in your situation if he's his interest level is too low and his investment is too low then you're really just wasting your time but if his interest level is low but he once was it once was high and his investment is high then there may still be something that you can do about it right and and if you're in the initial kind of dating phases because i'm not sure where you are specifically but you know tell us in the chat right now where you are specifically as far as like dating the guy if it's if it's new or whether you know you're trying to get an ex back or what your situation is just let us know and we can talk about it some more so if his interest level is medium or above there's almost certainly something that you can do about it and so what do you do by the way if you're here with us right now say hi in the chat and tell us where in the world you're watching this from it's it's so cool to see all these women from all over the world watching these live streams so what can you do about it what how can you build his attraction and desire so that if you did cut things off or if you went away or you weren't texting him he actually misses you and he wants to be around you and he thinks about you and he's like um i want to be back together with her that would be nice wouldn't it so let's talk about what you can do and we're i'm going to share a technique today it's called connection cycling and this technique is really really awesome think about this how cool would it be if you could actually control how much love attraction and desire that your man has for you wouldn't that be valuable to you i think it would so let's talk about connection cycling there's four different parts to it there's four parts to connection cycling the first one is connection so the first part is connection you're connecting with him in some way so he either reaches out to you or you reach out back to him or you're reaching out to him for the first time it kind of depends on the situation right like it depends on where you are and how long it's been since you've talked to him or if you've even talked to him yet or not and so how do you reach out to him in an attractive way in a way that almost guarantees that he will respond there's really two different elements that you want to have in a really good text message that you send to a guy where there's a really high probability chance that he's going to respond and the first one is that you want there to be some kind of curiosity element like he doesn't know what you're going to say but it's really entry he's really interested in it and the second component is you want it to have something to do with him so curiosity about what you're gonna say and it has something to do with him if you have those two elements in a text message that you send to a guy there's a really high probability chance that he's going to respond and so what's a good text message that you can send to a guy here it is do you know what i like about you so that's the text message you send do you know what i like about you and when you send that to a guy even if he doesn't like you he probably will still want to know what it is that you like about him right and it's got those two elements he's curious like what's she gonna say and two it's about him right and even if like let's say that you guys have been fighting and you guys have been fighting a whole lot and and you're like okay well i want to reconnect with him you could say something like hey i know we have kind of been um had a lot of arguments and fights recently but let me uh let me ask you something do you know what i like about you right and if you do that if you send him that there's a really good chance that he's gonna be like okay right because you're you're kind of breaking this pattern that you guys might have of of fighting and arguing and you're creating kind of this new slate right it's like this new beginning it's you're creating a pattern that maybe he's not used to having you send to him and so all of a sudden he's like wait what's going on here and so there's there's kind of this myth out there i want to bust a myth real quick and there's this myth out there that you shouldn't let a man know that you like him that is a myth you absolutely should let a man know that you like him however the truth is is that you should make a man think that you're not completely sold on him yet and it's this has been proven over and over again through research studies that the more confusion or uncertainty that a man has around how much you like him the more he'll feel attracted to you and so you can tell a man that you like him but you don't want him to feel like you're completely sold on him yet you want there to be some doubt in his mind or uncertainties not sure well she likes me but i'm not really sure how much right i'm not sure that she's sold on me so it's okay to say do you know what i like about you it's totally fine it's actually a really really great thing and so what do you say after that right so you sent him this text message and you're like you know what i like about you and he's like what right tell me or or maybe he might even say something funny if he's a really funny guy and so here's what you want to do when you send the next text message you want to frame his behavior i talk about framing in my love frames toolkit well here's what you want to do you want to say something you want to frame some kind of behavior of him being a gentleman or him being kind and considerate or him being something that you like right like a behavior that you really like in his so don't talk about his arms or his hair or his back or anything like that talk about behaviors of his and frame it as something that is really attractive to you so you know i i really think it's attractive how you always open doors for me when we're hanging out with each other or you know i think it's really cool and i think it's really hot how kind and considerate you are to wait staff whenever we go out or you know i i i just i think it's really sexy whenever you uh you know you talk about whatever subject he knows about and how smart you are about that right so you want to frame some kind of behavior of his that you like as an attractive or sexy or uh you know really hot behavior that he has that you like and if you can't think of anything you can't think of anything that you like about him in in terms of behaviors then you're probably with the wrong man just saying just saying you might you might be with the wrong guy if you can't think of anything here right and then once you say that the next thing that you do to continue this conversation is to flip it and so we're going back over this again do you know what i like about you frame some kind of behavior and then flip it and flipping it looks like this you say your turn what do you like about me smiley face and so what you're doing here if he decides that he wants to play into this game is that you you start creating a rationalization in his mind because when he starts talking about things that he likes about you what starts happening is he starts thinking in his mind about things that he associates positively with you right and and he starts rationalizing that he does like you and that he likes you even more and so this can work no matter where you what stage you are with a man you can say this and you can do this and you can turn it into a game that you guys play and it can be a lot of fun you can take this and do it for a long time you can do it for weeks you can do it for months you can do it for hours you can do it for however long you want to and it can become a really fun game that that makes him focus on all the things that he likes about you and builds up this image of you and his mind so he likes you more and more and more and rationalizes it okay so can you see how valuable that text message would be if we didn't talk about anything else on this on this live stream could you see how valuable that text message would be if you used it with a guy say yes if you have if you get what i'm talking about say i get it in the chat if you don't get what i'm talking about you can ask your questions or if you have questions about your situation you can ask those too okay so number two second part of connection cycling is something that i call positive shared experiences and so you want to stay away from all the negative stuff out there right because i get these women i had this woman come to me not too long ago where she was talking about how she was constantly in these fights and she was attacking this guy and she was you know calling him all these names and doing all this stuff and she wants to know how to get him to come back to her and i'm like you know if you've been attacking a guy like that and you know doing that for a long period of time it's really really difficult because you've created these associations around yourself these negative associations you you're starting to associate anger rage negativity so when he sees her what ends up happening is he immediately starts getting angry he immediately gets upset he immediately gets mad or whatever right and instead you want him to get excited you want him to feel love you want him to feel like he can't wait to grab you and hold you in his arms again and just kiss you all over the body like right that's what you want isn't it wouldn't that wouldn't that be great so that when he just just thinks about you he's just he just can't wait to just see you and he just feels so great about you isn't that something that you'd like i hope so i hope so so what do you do instead what do you do instead how do you do less work and create more attraction more desire more love for you how do you do that let's talk about that right here so here's what you want to do focus on what it is that he wants and needs and not what you want to give to him and so i hear women complaining all the time they'll come on my page or they'll be in my community and they'll be like i'm giving everything to a man and he's taking me for granted right and it's like the scream right because you can just feel the pain it's really painful i like you know i i haven't been in that situation before thankfully but i can just imagine how painful that would be if you're giving every you thought you were giving everything to somebody and they're taking you for granted and here's the reason why that happens because you're giving all the wrong things to him so if you're giving him the wrong things it doesn't matter how much you give to him if you're giving him the wrong thing he's he's not going to feel loved he's not going to feel better about you he's not going to feel more attracted to you and so you have to only give him the things that he wants because if you give him all these other things and he doesn't want those things it doesn't matter right and it's the same thing with men with women uh there's something out there called the love languages right and if your love language is really high with like physical touch and words of affirmation where you like when guys like give you massages and tell you how pretty you are but uh really low you don't like getting gifts right like it's nice but it's not like it doesn't make you feel loved and a guy comes over and he's constantly buying you gifts it doesn't matter how many gifts he buys you because you're not going to feel loved through that and so what you what he needs to find out is what it is that you actually want and you can do the love languages way there's a quiz out there that you can take i do recommend the love languages stuff because it's really good stuff but there's a there's an even better way to do it in my opinion there's a much much better way to do it so that you're not relying on these kind of grand categories and instead you find out exactly what it is that he wants and most men don't need much most men do not need much and so instead you want to give him only what he needs and desires that way you become the primary source of positive emotion in him and so how do you find out what it is that he wants and needs here's how you do it you ask him and you ask him this question you say what makes you feel loved what makes you feel loved this is actually a question that i have in my long distance allure program about how to get into law how to make a man crave you in a long distance relationship and it this works really really well just ask him what makes you feel loved and she'll tell you most guys will tell you what makes them feel loved and you just want to make mental notes of that and and you can classify it right categorize it right when i i feel loved when you know this happens or that happens if he says you know when uh somebody you know takes care of me or somebody does this for me you know you can kind of look at it and say okay what's happening there is it you know this is it that and then you can you can give him more of that type of a thing and you're more likely to make him feel really positive emotions when he's around you because what we typically do is we like to give to other people what we like to get so for instance i'm my primary love language is um is physical touch so i love it when people touch me like if i go out and i talk to you i'm likely to grab your shoulder and give you a hug and you know that kind of a thing and pat you on the back and like all that kind of stuff right because i just love touching people and i love people touching me and there's a lot of people that don't like touch right there a bunch of people out there that do not like touch and so you have to be aware of that and you have to see what people like and what they don't like and maybe ask them questions about it that way you're not giving to them what you want but they don't want right you need to find out what they want and then give that to them so that's not going to beat a dead horse here any more than that so you can do everything for him and hope that it works or you can do less work and make him feel more attracted to you so think about it doing less work is a better plan wouldn't you agree wouldn't you agree that doing less work is a better plan so here's what i want you to do next we've got two more but answer this in the chat what is the best lesson that you have learned about dating i want to know what is the best lesson that you have ever learned about dating answer that in the chat all right so number three number three is give him space this is step three of connection cycling number one is connection number two is positive shared experiences number three is giving him space so i have a a metaphor out there that i talk about sometimes which is a song you hear a great song right you hear you have like this song that you hear and the first time you hear you're like oh my god i love the song it's the best right and you start listening to it maybe you put it on your phone or some something and start listening to it on repeat you're listening to it all the time you're like yeah i love the song right um but if you listen to it over and over all day long every day for weeks eventually it just starts losing its its grandioseness right it loses how special it is it's not it's not as interesting to you anymore but if you stop listening to that song and if you have a little bit of time between then and when you hear it again let's say it comes up on the radio you know a week later or something you're like yeah this is my song again right and the reason that is is because there's some distance between there right and so you it created more value for that song when you hear it again and so it's kind of the same thing right you want you want to be his favorite song but you don't want to play yourself out when you're around him instead you want it to be far more exciting and the best way to do that is to create some space he can't miss you if you're in front of them all the time and so what do you do during that time you take up some some hobbies and you talk with friends and you build connection with others so that this guy isn't the only place that you're getting your connection from you want to get your connection from lots of places because if something weird happens with him then it'll completely devastate you if you're not getting connection from other places so you want to get connection from all around in your life if you give a man space you'll become more valuable to him when you're around and even when you're not around and you'd rather be a lot more valuable to him than less valuable to him wouldn't you agree i hope so if you're saying yes right now make sure that you give him space before he needs it before he needs it it's called i call it the scarcity principle and you will become more valuable if you give him some space and he desires you and he likes you and he thinks you're amazing right so you're you're giving them some space there number four right connection cycling number four is repeat and so what you want to do is repeat this whole cycle again connect with him again positive shared experiences again give him space again repeat and you just do that over and over and over again and you build a really powerful connection an obsessive like connection with him and if you want to learn more about how to do that check out my program at commitmentconnection.com forward slash obsession and you can check out that program and build just an obsessive like love uh healthy healthy obsession uh kind of love connection with him so answer this question in the chat before we go to question the answer answer this in the chat do you think it's possible for uh for someone to love two people at the same time do you think it's possible that somebody loves two different people somebody's in love with two different people at the same time tell us in the chat what do you think what do you what do you think lots of people say hello from all over hello hello hello hello hello hello hello hello chicago burbs nancy says i was six years with him he started to work out east again but i don't even know where is that i offered to join him but he said no he cheated on his wife and i'm worried he is doing it to me i mean there's people live in patterns right when you hear that somebody cheated on somebody else you that's a pattern and that it should be a very big red flag for you and concerning for you and make you wonder whether this is something that you really want to be a part of or not from that and so yeah i'd be concerned about that as well i'd be concerned about it as well louisiana facebook user anonymous says hi matthew i'm in new york city just curious at this point don't really want to get my ex back he recently reached out to me okay okay okay nancy says it's been a week that we haven't spoken because we had a fight he has a bad temper what should i say well nancy you're the one who um has this going on with this guy i mean you need to have a real conversation with this man nancy that's what you need to do is you need to sit him down you need to have a real conversation with him i mean he like disappears for a long time he stops talking to you for a while you just need to have a real conversation with them and just talk to them about what's going on and and just get uh you know how long have you guys been seeing each other what have you been doing are you in a committed relationship if you're not in a committed relationship my suggestion is that you start seeing other people and start building your connection with other people and other things in your life doreen says tell him you might be pregnant don't do that don't do that that is a bad way to go it's a bad way to go doreen i don't know what kind of bad advice are you spreading around here doreen it's just just a bad idea jeanette says what does means if boyfriend unblocked i'm not sure what you're saying there so he unblocked well i mean what you were blocked and then he unblocked you i'm more concerned about the fact that he blocked you and that you think he's your boyfriend if he's blocking you he's probably not really your boyfriend just gonna throw that out there and if he is then he's probably super immature and you need to start rethinking what kind of men you're dating truth three y three seek says we tell each other we like one another all the time we playfully banter like a couple of kids yeah i mean that's you know one that's awesome truth 3 y 3 seek that's really awesome because love is about being playful it's about connecting it's about having fun it's about you know all these things it's not serious it's not you know angry it's not any of those things it's about being playful and it's important that you keep that up right if you keep that up through the relationship that's how you build and grow it and you keep that spark and you keep that love and you keep all those things that you really want in the relationship long term that's how you do it is you keep that stuff that you bring from the beginning truth three why three seek says i tell him how he makes me when he's so passionate about cooking okay okey-dokey okey-dokey okey-dokey lots of people get it get it get it get it get it get it yes yes yes i get it yeah yeah i get it stephanie collins says yes i get it does it work if you haven't talked for about a month yeah i mean you can send him that you you know if you haven't talked to a guy in about a month you might want to send them something else as a conversational starter there's some other things that you can send them i have a uh it's called a hey stranger text and basically you just say hey stranger how are you doing right and uh it's basically just starting up the conversation again you can you can use that you can use uh you might not want to use this um because it's been so long since you've talked to them but you can you can definitely use it um in the conversation after the you know after you've talked for a little bit that that's definitely a great way to do it right like the the do you know what i like about utex is great for a lot of different scenarios to build kind of that connection to build your likes with each other to build how much you guys really bond and see each other as great amazing people that you want to be with luis says what if you're leaning back because it's always you starting contact and has left you on red for two weeks taking me a lot to go this long without contacting him will this send all my hard work down the drain well first luis here's what i want to mention about this right because i get a lot of different people that are kind of confused about different things the question is he left you on red but what did he leave on red right because sometimes women will come to me and they're like well we ended a conversation and he left me on red and it's like well if it was at the end of a conversation it's not that big of a deal if you send him a question right like i have a program it's called irresistible text and in my irresistible text program you can get it at commitmentconnection.com forward slash text and in my irresistible text program one of the things i talk about is this idea of text messages that are worth replying to and so if you sent him a text message where you ask them a question or something that deserved a reply it deserved an answer and he left you unread that's very different than if he just left you on red and it was the end of a conversation that you guys were having and now it's been two weeks so there's a lot of concern that i have luis about you know what's been going on in that two weeks what are you doing in that two weeks you know what kind of a relationship you guys have if you guys are just dating each other which i'm just going to assume that you are because if you're in a committed relationship there's nothing better than having real conversations if you're in an actual committed relationship where it's just the two of you it's not i'm not talking about boyfriend girlfriend i'm not talking about you know dating i'm talking about being in a committed relationship if you guys are in a committed relationship you should have a real conversation and talk to him about what's going on with him and all that kind of stuff if you guys are just dating right now there's one of those things where sometimes we'll get women that are like they're like oh you know this man ghosted me right and it turns out that they kind of both ghosted each other because if you're both waiting for the other person to contact each other then who really ghosted who right like what's really going on there and so if it's been two weeks and let's say let's even say that he left you unread because you asked a great question but he ignored your question but you still want to talk to him and you're in this situation it's been two weeks after two weeks you can send him another message it's okay here's what you want to be careful of though luis is you want to be careful that you're not chasing him so it's okay to send out like breadcrumbs right sending him breadcrumbs where he follows the breadcrumbs and and he's chasing after you what's not okay is that you start doing everything and setting up the dates and doing all that stuff what i talked about at the beginning of this video was how to know if a guy really likes you and the way that you know this is by his investment how much is he investing in you how much is he pushing things forward how much is he pushing to meet up with you how much is he pushing to talk to you if he's not doing it very much he might not like you that much and so if it's been a while and you guys were having great conversations and things just kind of died off you can send him a text message and it's not a big deal and but you want him to start investing and you want him to start moving forward you want him to start pushing for a meet up if you don't do that if if he doesn't start doing those things then you know that he just doesn't like you that much and i'm just going to assume that you guys are at more of the initial phases of dating and so you're saying taking me a lot to go this long without contacting him will this send all my hard work down the train no i mean after two weeks it starts going okay are we even dating anymore is there even anything going on here anymore after two weeks it's okay it's okay to send him a message and not worry about it it's okay and if you don't want to that's okay too doreen says value yourself first i agree doreen i agree with you don't rain becky says he keeps wanting reassurance how do i go about it as it's repetitive yeah i mean that's a difficult thing because really what reassurance means is that he's insecure and so he needs to work on himself because this is only going to get worse it's not going to get better a lot of people think that right and if you're one of those people that constantly needs reassurance getting more reassurance doesn't end up fixing the problem because the problem has nothing to do with reassurance right what he's try asking for is certainty he wants to know for certain that everything's good that everything's okay that you really like him that all that kind of stuff and the reason that he wants that certainty is because he's scared within himself that he's not enough and that once you find out that he's not enough that you won't really love him and eventually what's probably going to end up happening here becky is that it's going to become a self-fulfilling prophecy right there's something i talk about called the law of belief transference and what the law of belief transference states is that whoever has the strongest beliefs about something will transfer those beliefs on to other people around them and so if your guy has a really strong belief that he's not enough and that you don't really love him and just all these different things eventually it's going to eat away at your love for him and it's going to make you feel less and less attracted to him until you want to push away and get away from him and so he has to work on his self-esteem you can't do it for him you can't coach him through it none of those things are going to work he has to work on that himself and so it's one of those things where you can give him reassurance but he's going to have to become strong within himself what it means is that he likes you a lot and he's scared of losing you and he needs reassurance because of that because because of his insecurities about himself and whether he actually deserves to have a great woman like you in his life that's what's going on with him facebook user says he took me for granted i gave him the wrong things it happens with a lot of people so don't i mean don't feel bad it happens with a lot of people and you just have to make sure you find out what that person wants and make sure you're giving that person the things that they want instead of the things that you think that you should be giving them that's far far more important is he says focus on what the other person wants and if it matches you then it's a winner otherwise you may become someone slave or dependent and not likely not likely i mean if if you don't have any boundaries you might become someone slave and dependent but if you do have boundaries and you know what somebody wants and you give it to them and if they become a taker and they're not giving see right like you're assuming that you're giving everything and you're not getting anything back in return and if you're in that kind of a situation then you should be concerned about that and number two you shouldn't be in that kind of situation instead the situation that you should be in is a situation where you're building together and you're growing together and you're both giving each other what it is that you both want and so you're building and growing a relationship together and you're fulfilling each other's needs and if you're not doing that then it could become a problem and so you just have to be smart you have to make sure that you're getting yourself into a good situation and you have to make sure that you're getting your needs met as well from him and if he isn't getting your you your needs you either need to find out why he's not doing that and you know one of the ways that it does work right is is once you're in a committed relationship and you're giving each other giving giving giving what usually happens is if you really fulfill a man with all the things that he needs he'll usually give you whatever it is that you want however um sometimes that doesn't happen and if it doesn't happen then you need to decide whether that's actually a relationship that you want to be in and if he isn't taking care of your needs and giving you what it is that you want then my suggestion is that you get out of that situation completely but yeah i mean you it doesn't necessarily have to match you right it doesn't necessarily have to match you it can match you which those are usually the best scenarios right if if you're let's you know let's say that you are a physical touch kind of person you just love physical touch and you meet a guy who's physical touch that's a great scenario because you guys are like laying around together and hugging each other and rolling around and you know smacking each other on the butt and stuff and you know laying outside looking up at the stars and giving each other massages and kissing each other all over the body and you just love it right and that's that's usually a really really great scenario however it can work in other scenarios too right like let's say that your top one is words of affirmation and his top one is physical touch you start giving him massages and kissing him all over and laying with him and he starts telling you how amazing and beautiful and awesome you are and how he's so lucky to have you in his life and how he can't wait to see you again and and and how you're you know just the most amazing woman that he's ever met and how he'd move mountains to be with you and and how he does never want to leave you and all that kind of stuff right and all of a sudden you guys have a great match and you guys are just like yeah this is awesome together right and it doesn't have to be that you guys are doing the exact same thing so i hope that i hope that answers that wasn't even a question it was just a tangent a tangent that i was running off on and f says the giving wrong things is valuable spinach t-shirt this is actually a t-shirt with popeye the sailor man on it and it's got spinach it's got spinach because he's like i watched a cartoon of popeye the other day and it was just it was it was i was like there's no way that they would show that cartoon in today's social social climate it was hilarious it was hilarious it was hilarious laurie donna says hello finally i catch you live yeah megan says how do we find our own love language well there's a quiz just look it up go to google and type in love language quiz and you can take a big old quiz about it you'll find out exactly what your love language is [Music] danielle says is it true that physical appearance does matter to a man or is that a myth well of course it matters to a man i you know i don't know how you wouldn't not think it actually matters to most most people men and women however however it tends to matter more to a guy initially but it's not everything right it is important and it it is something right because guys are visual creatures and we see things and we see what we like and we're you know really attracted to it and it can really help a lot with his attraction towards you if he's physically attracted to you from the very beginning there danielle however it's not everything i i have a friend and i've talked about this in other live streams and he we were good friends in college and he was known he was absolutely known for dating these really thin blonde women and that's all he ever dated was really thin really really thin blond women and one day he ended up with this woman who wasn't thin and she wasn't blonde right and they started dating each other and they're dating each other for a while and uh you know i remember everybody was like talking about it they're like yeah you know his name is mike and they're like yeah mike you know it's like i don't know he's like dating this this other woman she's really beautiful but she's not like what he because we would always whenever we go out to bars or go anywhere we'd always see mike with a thin pretty blonde girl right and so like he ended up with this other woman who was very i mean she was she was very good looking she and but she was a lot thicker right she's like thick right you know like real thick and uh i remember leaving i left i this was in i went to a school in scottsdale arizona and i left scottsdale i left asu which was the school i went to and i came back a few years later and i ran into mike and he was still dating this woman right and i was just like okay i gotta talk to him about this right and so like we we sat down and we were talking and i was like hey man um i got a question for you you know how you always used to date like these really thin blonde girls everybody knew that that's what you're into and he was like yeah yeah yeah you know and i was like yeah you know you're dating uh her name's lindsay i was like you're dating lindsay now and uh you know i think she's a very wonderful person she's really cool and really awesome but she's not you know like the thin blonde girl that you you know used to go for and he's like he's like you're right man he's like i don't know it's just you know when i met her and it's just like ever since then there's something about her it's just like the way she moves and the way she talks and the way that she like kind of comes over and like touches me and i don't know there's something about her that just makes me want to grab her and just rip all of her clothes off and make love to her and just kiss her all over her body and just you know tell her how much i love her and just all those things right and um what what i realized about it was it was actually her feminine energy right it was it was that emotional connection that she has to herself and she she's like this dancer right and she loves to dance and she just gets into her body and she's just moving around and she's just really comfortable with herself and her body and her emotions and just being connected and all that kind of stuff and it just really pulled him in and so yeah physical stuff is important right there's a lot of things to physical stuff that is important and at the same time it's not everything there's an emotional connection that many times can overcome that physical that that physical attraction that a guy has for a woman and that deeper emotional connection is that thing that ends up growing into love and all these other things and so it is absolutely it is absolutely um something that that is important and uh there's things that since there's only so much you can do about it right i think it's important that you take care of yourself and you're you're doing lots of things to make sure that you're strong and healthy and you're conveying healthy traits that you have it together and all that kind of stuff and at the same time there's only so much that you can do about it right unless you start getting plastic surgery and all that kind of stuff which i don't recommend i recommend that you build your self-esteem that you connect with your body that you build your connection to yourself and that you you get into your energy and you use that and use your emotion to connect with men that's a much much better way to do it much better way to do it so lots of people have truth says we have many soulmates erica says yes but not exactly the same feelings energy talking about loving two people at the same time annette says yes loving two people at the same time is possible [Music] jeanette says matt you are glowing so handsome well i appreciate your amazing compliments for me jeanette janet jeanette i'll just pretend your name is jeanette but it could be janet nanette says no for me because you cannot you can't give some the same attention for each [Music] jennifer says if he ignores you run far away someone who really loves you will not ignore you and tell you you wouldn't have anything if it weren't for me calls you worthless sounds like jennifer has had this happen to her before in a very toxic relationship and i'm glad that you're out of that jennifer and i hope that you heal and you find the love that you are looking for leanne says hey everyone ohio i am i'm actually from ohio cincinnati ohio nasty natty lindsey says what do i do if an x reaches out and then goes distant reads text but no answer for hours don't really chat unless i do also very little well here's the thing lindsay here's what you should be doing so in between him messaging you and you being connected to him what you should be doing because he's obviously behaving in a way that shows little interest shows little interest and so what you should be doing or he's trying to play games or he's he's either he's either got little interest which is quite often the case where he's playing games either way what you need to be doing is you need to be going out and building yourself up and dating other people you need to start dating other people and uh getting and building your your abundance of connection and your abundance of options so that you become less and less attached to this man you need to build up yourself you need to start going out there and and building your identity doing things that build your identity who are you lindsay what are you about what is your life about figure that out and then go spend time doing things that solidify and build that identity of who it is that you are and then uh start dating other guys and doing things with other guys and then just don't worry about what this guy is doing you can talk to him but if he's not moving things forward if he's not pushing things forward if he's not trying to do all that kind of stuff i mean you can try to trick them and do all that kind of stuff with them if you want to but it's it's probably not going to work instead here's what i suggest that you do and this is something that can work really really well if you're reconnecting with a guy and that is to break off the possibility of him getting back together with you and the way that you do that is by friend zoning him and the way that you friend zone a guy is you call him your friend and you tell him that you like being friends with him and you talk about just being friends and if he suggests the idea of being back together you tell him that you'd rather just be friends at this point and the reason that this works is because we want things that we can't have right and so what you're actually doing here is you're pulling a lot of the power away from him when you friend zone a guy it's it's a really it can be a really devastating thing for a lot of guys and so when you friend zone a guy what it does is a lot of times it puts down his barriers and makes him think about you like oh she's not dangerous she's not gonna get all clingy she's not gonna jump on my leg and hold on to my leg while i'm walking you know instead she's gonna look at you or he's to look at you and be like okay well she just wants to be friends so it's okay we can be friends and it's not going to get weird and then when you connect with them again you you do what i'm talking about with connection cycling where you build strong powerful emotional connections with him and then you give him space and it creates this really powerful kind of obsession-like effect that will build his desire and love for you and it'll grow and grow and grow and grow and so that's that's what i suggest you do is that you fret your friend zone them lindsay you friend zone that guy and you start hanging out with other people and start dating other people and you break off your connection and your uh attachment to him laurie says i feel like i'm addicted to messaging him it drives me crazy well get other things going on in your life lori get all the things going on in your life laurie all right so there's a reason why i'm not a singer i do do karaoke though so if anybody wants to do some karaoke if you want to do some karaoke let me know all right mariska says we dated for three months i needed space because he didn't know for sure he disliked the distance and hope that we could see each other two and a half months later i reached out and he didn't want any contact so yeah i mean he probably feels really hurt by you right and here's what you need to do mariska is you need to start dating other people you know and like here's the thing right if you break things off with a guy and you're like hey i need something more than this and he's like oh i'm not sure i don't know right and then you go back to him and you're like hey you want to talk again you know he's probably going to be hurt and he's probably going to feel like you know you kind of betrayed him and if um you know he's not together mentally then he's probably hurt by it right but at the same time you don't want to be back in that relationship and if you're the one that's reaching out and trying to get a hold of him you're putting yourself at a lower position of power which means that you're he's probably not going to change his mind when you cut things off with a guy like that you have to walk away and not look back you can't look back and try to reach out to him and try to start talking to him again because you get lonely and all that kind of stuff look forward build new relationships meet new people get into new situations and if he gets it together at some point and decides that he wants to have a real relationship and that you're awesome and that he loves you and you know all that kind of stuff then he can come back to you and prove to you that he is the right guy for you don't go back to him that's you're going in the wrong direction here you need to be going forward and building new connections and meeting new men who are open and ready who are sure who are sure about you that know that they want something real with you that look at you and say you are an amazing beautiful awesome woman that i want to spend the rest of my life with that i want to give everything to that i want to be committed to that i want the two of us to be in this relationship together going through life together on the same team in partnership that's what you want you want a guy who's not confused who says you're it you're the only one that i want and i want to be with you mariska that's what you want you want a guy that says that anything else is not a guy in a situation that you want to be in and if you're reaching back out to him after he told you that he's confused you're going in the wrong direction and you're putting yourself in a lower position of power and that means that he's unlikely to change his mind you need to move forward and let him come back to you think about it like like a cat right if if you go chasing a cat he's just gonna run away right instead you want that cat to come to you and start parrying on your lap and be like right you know and you rub it and you're like yeah you know are you going to be are you going to be the kind of cat that is going to take us to the promised land where we're going to be in this great relationship together and if you're not that's fine get off my lap i've got i've got room for other cats i want a cat that's going with me right we're going to the promised land we're getting into a committed relationship that's what we're doing here mariska that's what we're doing and so don't settle don't you settle mariska don't you settle for anything less all right getting i was getting a little carried away there getting a little carried away fcfz says a new encounter was going well online with a new person but then i sabotaged by not giving space and being negative about his interest he blocked me could he ever come back yeah i mean it's possible but the problem with you know an encounter with an online person you know is that there's not a lot that's emotionally connected there right so there's there's not a lot of investment if you remember at the beginning of the video i talked about whether it's going to happen whether it's worth your time or not and the whether it's worth your time has to do with his interest level and his investment so if at one point he was really into you and he's gotten heavily invested in you but his interest has dropped it's possible that it could come back however since you're in a situation where it's this online person and you guys have just been talking online there's not a lot of investment there and his interest level has gone really far down and so the likelihood that he's going to come back is really really low it's just really low you know and there's not a lot that can happen there and he blocked you right which is basically shutting things off and saying i don't want anything to do with you anymore and so what you need to do fzfz is you need to look forward and start marching forward take your that pretty little head of yours and look forward into the future and say i'm going to create what it is that i want and my future is brighter if this person doesn't want to be on this journey with me that is their loss and i shall move into the future and create an amazing relationship where i'm valued and i'm cherished and i have a man who sees me and doesn't block me instead he wants to talk to me he wants to communicate with me he wants to spend lots and lots of time with me and tell me how beautiful i am and and you know we can touch each other's hair and and lay on the the ground look up at the stars and write each other little notes and you know help each other with all the things that we want to help each other with that's what you want to do there f z f z that's what you wanna do that's what you wanna do that's what you wanna wanna wanna do [Music] what you wanna do what you wanna do do all right i'm my seeing is going downhill very quickly here so i'll just go ahead and stop that jamie says been friends for almost six years trying a long distance he always says he loves me and will move to be with me but always makes some excuse not to come he has an emotional past am i wasting my time yeah so here's here's what you want to do right you want to jamie you know what i can tell that you are not using my program you want to know how i can tell that because there's a big difference between women who are using my program and women who are not using my program the women that are using my program they say things to me like there's a few different guys and they're all chasing me and they're investing me and i really like them which one do i pick or they'll say you know they'll ask questions about the specific things about like connecting and stuff like that and you know committed relationships and you know what do i how do i make sure that i'm prepared for marriage and how do i know that this is the right guy for me and all that kind of stuff it doesn't sound like you're doing that right because you've been friends with a guy for six years and he says that he loves you and will move to be with you but always makes an excuse right and there's something that i talk about and it's very very important that you listen to this and it's this whenever a man's actions and a words his words and his actions are not in alignment what you need to do is listen to the worst of the two right and so in this case his words are i love you and i want to be with you i think you're so special jamie but then his actions are but i have a whole bunch of excuses about why i'm not going to come and see you right and so what you want to do is listen to the fact that he's making excuses and go bye bye felicia next move out there right and come from a place of value and believing in yourself and go out there and stand in the street and say who wants to come and value me and be in a great relationship with me and maybe you don't want to do that but what you do want to do is check out my program at the foreverwomanformula.com get it you can check it out watch that video get the program for free if you want to stay a part of our community there's a fee that's attached to it but you can get you know 14 days of coaching for free and there's lots of really great stuff in that program go over the program 10 times and use what is in that program because that is your best chance at getting into the relationship that you want we've we have women that are all the time they're getting married they're getting engaged they're finding the the man of their dreams in our community and you see it all the time you see all these photos and stuff from all these women getting into the relationships that they want and if you want to be one of those women my suggestion is you check out my program at the forever foreverwomanformula.com and get my program for free so thank you everybody that's it i hope you enjoyed this video and it is an honor and a privilege for me to be a part of your journey in helping you we have some of the most beautiful amazing women in the world as a part of our community so thank you everybody i will speak with you again soon have a great day night evening morning wherever you are in the world and i'll talk to you later

Channel: Matthew Coast

Views: 14,399

Rating: 4.8773007 out of 5

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Id: -LnoMGjrKlw

Length: 62min 26sec (3746 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 07 2021