Bill Burr - PC Culture, 'Shark Tank', Comedy - Jim Norton & Sam Roberts

welcome bill burns I'm good how are you you look thin dude oh yeah thank you nice yeah I've been you know I got a nutritionist really why I've wanted to learn I'm [ __ ] hate going to the gym so I just was like what am I doing wrong you know so then I went on the Internet as I go I'll learn about nutrition on the internet and that's like trying that's like listening to Democrats and Republicans thank you good eggs a bet and I was just like why don't I get somebody that actually knows if to through all of this [ __ ] and what do you think um they just I don't know it's just a lot of it's boring [ __ ] I mean I don't know they could I just had you know what it is I don't that I've retained it as much as I have all the recipes so I can show so I do like smoothies and [ __ ] for like breakfasts and stuff and did they really fill you up like everything that I eat now not now cuz I've been on the road I've been eating bad but like when I eat I cheat once in a while too that I eat makes me feel energized but then I'm hungry quickly after that yeah cuz I'm fueling my body as opposed to poisoning it so I see how [ __ ] Hollywood am I came in URI you sorry now I'm talking about my diet your nutrition tell you about my cause my charity my startup that has my name on it yeah it's somehow helping unfortunate people yeah I've watched those uh like the food documentaries on Netflix and at first it seemed like a good idea I was like oh yeah I can't eat that anymore oh yeah I guess corn is bad cuz it's in everything again but then they literally have a documentary about every single food yeah yeah being bad for you there's no possible way to discern which one's [ __ ] which one you should be doing yep and the food Lobby is strong from what I've heard yeah Sam when did you start doing the whole this old house look he just built a deck or something my plan number two pencil behind you here kind of like looking and measuring yeah do you like the beard we hate the beard now I like it I like it a lot yeah give me gives you a rugged look that's why yeah that's why it looks like there's no hassles I can build things balances out the Gabe Kaplan but you see that like this old house is the thing a man would do yeah that's the first time somebody has said like oh you look like you do manly things that's probably because I have facial hair now maybe do you know like you you know how to build some [ __ ] right exactly I don't all right yeah it doesn't matter yeah he just no one doesn't know that mm-hmm but just walking down the street people gonna look at that builder yeah this is a guy who can help me even so more before you look like you created an app focused on how much we hate the facial hair we the whole staff what's wrong with it thank you better thank you well I'm trying to get bill to help you you can just say looks good Josie that's so qualified like you could just say that looks good if you say that looks better than its it's a direct reference to me believe you're not a good-looking guy another word yes well you come yourself up the better your radio that's [ __ ] Jason master people have said they said the beard is is makeup for men men men men will grow beards the way women use makeup to cover up their horrible faces damn okay there you go which is something that I think other people who grow beards are told that's what I think things are said and then they're retweeted and then they become truth yeah how's your company man we had Ted Alexandro here yesterday promoting this special oh yeah yeah we've been we signed a deal with Comedy Central to produce three one-hour of four one-hour specials the first one's gonna be Paul verses that comes out [ __ ] on November and November 2nd and then we're gonna do gonna do one with Ian Edwards Jessica Kirsten and we're figuring out somebody else right so these are all [ __ ] people that you know Ted Alexandro working with all these people that comics know are great yeah but they don't uh they don't like like right now he's a Sam has a great industry look all he needs is just have the hoodie you have the very the alt look that was big I don't think it's in anymore she's not no no no you got you got a dick so that's like nine strikes right there behind yourself and say something about Hillary right then I think maybe they can get you a holding deal it's a weird time Jim how are you handling this comedy climate are you sick of that [ __ ] question yeah yeah they're really talking about that with mark before you came in marching up marks heaven it marks having a tough time I'm nervous dad don't be to drive the bus right through it that's the point but it's you know you never know know you take to process and burden of proof and you throw that out the [ __ ] window right need to give it to a bunch of [ __ ] lunatics who think that they're so goddamn right I mean they're insane they're [ __ ] and saying there's so many people on Twitter that I follow like ironically there's I got the big stories want to hear what the [ __ ] they're saying yeah how do you spin this one on the Kavanagh one was somebody tweeted I lost male friends this week and and then people were like consoling this person like something happened to her it's like this isn't about you this this is this poor woman's story right and you're hijacking it and people are consoling you cuz you're watching something you just hear at home you gave yourself [ __ ] jury duty and you're gonna sit here and watch this thing that you don't have a [ __ ] vote on and get yourself all worked up it's it's some of the best entertainment they love it they love waiting angry and you know what I never got is the norm hate and they go well he was never funny like what are you kidding I never liked norm like what he's maybe one of the best of all time yeah no one had to go to an apology tour for having an opinion yeah he didn't even he didn't do anything he just didn't have the opinion that they wanted and he had to basically yeah yeah he has to apologize to 15 percent of the [ __ ] population and The Tonight Show cancelled him and they said respect for our viewers like what I know people are crying and these things who is crying tonight oh no yeah it makes no sense and it's all because he did it in the first interview on us to stop pointing that's triggering me I'm sorry okay I want an apology from you I didn't mean to be aggressive I did some things that I know you can't see the Sam is pointing of this day I didn't understand I now understand that my behavior right I didn't I didn't look at it through the lens the current Clint lens of this climb that's right that's very tone-deaf of you it is it was in village trigger oh sorry yeah sorry about that yes didn't promise er but yet the because he did it on the beginning of a press tour cuz obviously he had to keep going on the press to her and so the rest of it he wasn't even promoting the Netflix show anymore he was just promoting the fact that he was apologizing for the first interview on the tour ah you know it saved norm the view the view was nice to him they all like yeah they were great to her it's the best joy was great to him Whoopie as a you know something Whoopie goes back and forth of the comics but I think she was great to him they were all pretty nice to norm and I'm like I think that just kind of stopped the bleeding but it was also great because he stopped doing interviews and it just went away because people got distracted by the next thing to be asked about yeah now everyone's off the hook with this [ __ ] Saudi Arabia story there's no one getting any [ __ ] now everyone's kind of played what happened there the actual murder I'd even missed this it happens I was asking Jim who books this club and I accidentally killed him fingers off one by one well there's audio of them cutting this guy's fingers they say there's audio I believe it I believe the Turner's girl was monitoring the embassy there's things through his Apple watch but it's [ __ ] but I'm like that all the conspiracy stuff that we've talked about in the past this is a [ __ ] juicy one dude how can you how could you [ __ ] do that to another human being listen to them scream in agony and then you can continue there's a there's a there was a quote and the thing that we were saying that somebody said they heard the audio and that the guy who was cutting off the fingers and stuff said something to the effect of I always wear my headphones when I do this and like Patrick Bateman in American Psycho put his Walkman on or whatever and started playing music through his headphones so he didn't have to hear the screaming the human being so you know we deserve what's whatever whatever the end of this is yeah we're just awful so you're willing even though you're not a human being that would cut fingers off the fact that your species does that you'd be like you know what that's a wrap we did it yeah we did it to ourselves I didn't do it personally all right so I please do that like now what am I going to do as a person to continue to make sure that the happen am I gonna get involved you know or am I gonna go buy a New York Post and get a bacon egg and cheese sandwich that's it yeah second one yeah yeah second one yeah it's the same thing we're all gonna do that's something I've been messing around through my Aquin people the way they'll talk about you know white male privilege and all that type of stuff is like I can't wait for it to level out and I want to see how you behave when you're up in the hill and you're in the hot tub you're gonna get out of the hot tub you're gonna you're not gonna do a bump model you're gonna get out of the hot tub and walk down the hill and go help somebody change a flat and their [ __ ] tire it's just it's not human nature and they're they're they're equated it to sex and race and that what it really is is just human beings are an incredibly self-absorbed and selfish so if you're in a position of that of privilege you everyone's going to behave you know you're privileged I do when I walk and I know that was wonderful of you to announce you're checking your privilege yet giving up on what it is you're woke thank you can't break balls anymore because somebody's gonna take it seriously right they're gonna somehow I don't know all of a sudden you said something about baby seals and you have to like apologize because there's that straight triggered somebody it wasn't that you said that but if your vagina you can statutory rape somebody and it goes away in like [ __ ] six minutes would they end then male priviledge the whole time oh that's what it was so it's not that big of a deal yeah it is it doesn't count right it doesn't count right you saying the baby seal thing that woman would now I get it yeah now I get it she was raped by a baby and you should have known that before you said yeah cuz it's been a confusing time I want to make sure that I'm on the right side of woke yeah we have to be on the right side of history bill yes we did and then I always worry what if we're on the wrong side of history and the right side it's become this this speak right it's like all of this language did not [ __ ] exist now and I was like this is crazy [ __ ] code like you're in a cult yeah yeah you're gonna be found out if you know like I don't want the [ __ ] that means and if he's just walking around my favorite thing is how like literally think it's like 80% of people after [ __ ] goes down everybody's just sort of quiet and then you just saw a pair off with friends being like dude murmuring yeah but no one's saying it out loud everyone's just murmuring yeah how could people act like you know when they reach a level of success that somebody like a bill burr has reached that you can't have conversations like this anymore like how have you survived how have ice in this current climb this current I wasn't sure if you were talking about the the previous client future climate know the current climate as we head towards the future climate towards the huge club well you know I've I've you know I've readjusted navigate it is fun right however cuz I'm not saying anything wrong I'm not like saying anything like mean-spirited right and when people like try to like they do all that gotcha [ __ ] and you just I just throw it back at him they'll be like so what do you be like promoting a [ __ ] movie in the big so what do you think what Lily come on I I don't know what do you think about it oh that's terrifying seems to be on your mind you kid what did you put I'm trying to promote a movie you're trying to [ __ ] it in my career here you [ __ ] like five lines in the movie can I keep my l-shaped couch you [ __ ] people will never acknowledge I know what you're doing you're only asking me about this because you don't care you want your tray we're hoping I'm gonna say something stupid Xin so you can get a bunch of hit and what does that say about the victims right here exploiting the victims hoping I'm gonna say something stupid you know what I'm offended I'm offended by your question oh no and I feel like in this current climate we triggered bill burr this is the to ask about Louisville burgers bill Burke is you know terrible gonna be the first white guy that gets triggered ask me about my trust fund I felt that was personal but is that interesting you identify as a white guy huh that's what you identify as hey I don't think there's really any choice once I shave my head I could curly I could maybe he said I had some sort of some flavor next and somebody in there I don't know although I don't know you saying that you don't have any choice as to what you identify as that's gonna trigger people okay you know what I mean people do have the choice you know my favorite thing is gender-neutral bathrooms like it's this groundbreaking concept it's like everyone chill dude everybody in your apartment you have a gender-neutral bathroom but because there's no silhouette and there's nothing written underneath it it's like this big like you know all the bathrooms in your house like those are all gender thing if I'm gonna take a [ __ ] that's gonna end up in a river and choke out a [ __ ] octopus or whatever I need a silhouette drawn of what I identify as it's right in order for me to relieve myself it's right well otherwise pedophiles are gonna come in and molest people you know I don't I don't know where that came from but that's what they say personal like I just I just I'm sorry I'm sorry like I've had experiences and I just feel like I shouldn't have I shouldn't have you know I don't feel safe in here anymore this is a safe space I might have been exercising privilege with that last statement and I yes you know I as I learned from Bill I've actually re-examined my question and I I take that back and I'm actually moved to public service all right because I'm the one who's offended there's no way I can ever forgive you and I don't feel you should ever be able to come back here right and sit in that chair and even if you do forgive him we won't I did that I don't like that I didn't have the choice as to whether I was gonna sit across from you or not how you should have here you should have said told me where everyone was gonna be seated seated before I got here I came in here I'm gonna ask you how you felt about not told you asked right right and there's not enough minorities in here oh my god you're right we're [ __ ] I mean I just got fired all of us are done it doesn't matter as many public apologies as you want yeah but it wasn't enough the stink of privilege is oozing under the door that's right Yeah right he didn't he didn't apologize enough I've pulled back from all of it mm-hmm I try to avoid all of those questions and I as I [ __ ] sit here joking about it for 20 minutes I just watch like me TV yeah I watch old gumshoe shows now I don't like is going on I just had given into being old and I've just when people come up and say I'm offended or I was triggered or whatever I'll just go okay I'll try and work on that Perry Mason Sunset Strip is my show Peter Gunn nobody gets killed quicker than on an episode of Peter Gunn it was only like [ __ ] 22 minutes long so at least somebody like sticks their head into a room and somebody chops it off and he's done what is 77 now what's that Sunset Strip it actually kind of started off as far as I understand it started off the the whole gumshoe like show everybody ripped like Peter Gunn was because of that show so it started Efrem Zimbalist jr. there was another guy Edie Byrne he played this guy kooky and he became like this teen idol sensation he's actually a really really good actor and all that swells ebin I know ed burns name well the brothers McMullen Edie burn but this guy was like eat like with two DS oh okay it's just you know one of these shows and it's like it's it's cool cuz there's murders and stuff like that but it's also that corny 50s thing like one of the characters he's always betting on horses so he always makes jokes about a horse and in case you didn't get it that it was a joke about a horse they actually play a trumpet that goes watching this is like 3:00 in the morning I just like I get it you had to do the horse [ __ ] thing with the trumpet but that's your escape yeah this bet your little vacation from no it's fun you go back and you watch an old la it's not as crowded right there's still the four seasons you know there's a climate change although the first report I guess was from back then I don't know yeah so so there's that that's probably why I watched like Shark Tank and Law & Order and those marathons of just nothingness we just mindless mindlessly sit there and go episode after episode after episode Shark Tank if you watch it for just how crooked the world is and how much your ego can spin out of control is a fun show to watch just watching them [ __ ] these people over and acting like one of my favorite ones is a YouTube clip of this guy who just turns down everybody's offer because he knows the value of his company and they actually I guess it went on to make a bunch of money and they get so [ __ ] upset yeah but he says no to them that they just resort to like name Carl like arrogance your blahblah I I just know what my company's worth and you haven't brought it to me yet yeah I'm not gonna do that how much were they off by well they were offering like two and a half I don't I don't get half the [ __ ] jargon in there so it was uh I was Ed Burns sorry but whatever whatever his company was according to the YouTube comments right is now with like 14 did 14 million in business or something like that and I want those people to be right because you know whenever I watch that show this is just like back in the day like when you would come in when the industry was holding all the cards right you would go in there with your hat in hand hey here's my great idea like great we're gonna own it we're gonna pay you great money the first time around and then that's gonna be cut in half and then we're gonna start sending you checks for [ __ ] seven dollars and 11 cents mmm while we we you know yeah we're hang [ __ ] and infinity pools I was watching one like a couple of nights ago where the woman comes in asking for like whatever it is 150 grand for 20% of my company and the offer ends up being like I'll give you 175 grand but I'm gonna need 75% of the company and like the woman's got these tears in her eyes because she's put her whole life into this company and she says something to the effect of like you know what owning a big piece of something small might not be as good as owning a small piece of something big with Mark Cuban I'll take it and you're just like 25,000 more Shiva 55% more for life kind of company it was like a product or whatever it was one of those invention things just bail because you get the exposure just from being on the show that's what they were saying that guy did yeah or like E or like a mr. wonder the ball guy mr. wonderful he's the best one he's the best cuz he always makes these deals that are so complicated that nobody's standing there's gonna figure him out and he goes like it's alone and when you pay it back I won't own any of the company but I want one dollar for each item sold in perpetuity how much were the items selling for whatever it was I don't know but they don't know I thought was 75 okay but they don't know what perpetuate like they like all this stuff perpetuity what [ __ ] you forever yeah and they're gonna bad word you know what okay we do need the cash flow so we'll do it and now they gotta give this guy a dollar for every item sold for the rest nice yeah I hate that I hate then again if it's if it's regular people getting [ __ ] out of there right yeah and that's why I'm out and how they sit up there like that you know they got the whole world figured out there is these tremendous you know being [ __ ] you guys are why sitting up there like you the Mount Rushmore of something no you made reboot of good but now because the show has been on so long well he must know what he's talking about he's the guy from shark tank I know he's not known from anything was what he actually did right right he build a company now he's started a spin around in the chairs like they do on the music show I'm on the voice like that's my invention no no not that one when they sit there listening to the notes as it floats by their artistic ears mm-hmm they spin around well that's how you know it's real because they're not picking it based on the aesthetic this is about the music I need to hear why can't they look at them I don't get it because they need to look away because people shouldn't be judged by how they look Jimmy can't prove it they should be judged by what they're bringing to the table this is some of the problem with people like you in positions of power yeah judging people how they look you're not wrong but with your genetics and the gifts that you were given how many free drinks you think she'll see yeah and then all like the I've seen the new trend is like the like beautiful women that have like millions of Instagram followers just because they post swimsuit you know photos and stuff like every three weeks or something have to post something about the the stress that they went through like when they were like I've been judged on my appearance so many times we're feeling ugly I was when I was young I'm [ __ ] Club right and it's like what your hope is this is just that you're hot I know I was called ugly and I am exactly I was accurately called ugly okay my comeback was fair enough Touche show your eyes work those it's Graham but models I follow many it's weird the guys who like them why do you have to click just enjoy it oh yeah there's not attention I guess I don't know there's the hope that they gonna pull you out of their depression with their sculpted ass they're gonna back it into your life when the sun's gonna start shining on you they're gonna scroll through their likes their 10,000 lights and finite one yeah that was a nice guy you liked me it's hope it's like the stripper the guy the stripper guy was like she likes me well go people go crazy online like any of those pictures if you start reading the comments guys will be leaving comments like grown men that are like oh oh I love you're such a beautiful spirit and oh it's another great photo but I really love you - I love your personality we should so what I'm special I'm special it's just it's it's mental illness it's I see through that piece of thong between your butt cheeks to the to the you're the sole the person that you are that's right I saw through your anus like a telescope I looked up through your [ __ ] and saw your heart is the window to the soul beautiful but models they promote each other they're generous they promote each other you gotta check out my girl Kiki but you know how the group does them you know that's clicky you know there are but models that have been cast away from the other but model so you know I think they've always been more like open than titty models models it very because they're not in right now right like to the seventies yeah 90s it kind of want with those big balloon tits that right we used to have what the [ __ ] almost like we had like bloodshot eyes it was just jump the shark there was like no way to go with this and then it became about now it's about the ass yeah you know so they're all support me I do like that though not not a giant giant but I do like a nice fat the best yeah but the answers have gotten so ridiculous and big like now it's like they're it's the same thing that happened with fake yes the fake ass is the fast yeah I felt one you can know when you feel thank you yeah you can feel it it feels it's a harder it's soft but it's almost like member how Stretch Armstrong used to feel or like the danoi yeah that's what it feels like no I just love it doesn't move with the legs like a lunch box a lunch box you want to [ __ ] right Yeah right it's just it's just I know it was uh what the hell was I think was in a gym or something like that as someone recently but I saw one out here surprise me there's a lot of them in LA yeah more so more so more so in like you know uh Miami like Dallas in Miami in Orange County is where I see the most extracurricular so that we may get on the road now now that you kind of been into every like sports stadium you've seen all the games now it's like I need to I need to monitor the fake asses in each city no I just noticed wha like when I was in Dallas was just every bartender just had these giant and they were like teardrop shaped titties I was like what is in the water on here and like someone's out the NAM and these are most of those are fake they just do so many they're really good at them in Dallas and Dallas yeah and then Arizona to Phoenix women huge yeah yeah yeah so Orange County was like that was the one where the guys was crazy like they had the remember Bruce Jenner I mean I got sure I don't know disappear I've seen it from it it was good well they they had like the eye lift that [ __ ] going on like the yeah where everything just looks like yeah you were like in a wind tunnel or something like that and I remember because my wife watches all those Real Housewives I used to think that like okay they just took an extreme version this is not an accurate portrayal of it and you go to Orange County it's not obviously not everybody but it is it's just it's a noticeable enough segment or maybe cuz I watched the show with her III noticed when I walked by was playing the The Improv and Irvine you know I was walking between shows I was just walking through the mall or whatever and I just I saw like three or four guys that just had that that Bruce Jenner [ __ ] yank back kind of thing going on there so I don't know I don't know why you would do like I think you just you look so much better if you just kind of roll with your genetics yeah it is what it is it's days even right you know what I mean where it's just kind of like Novi always places on the face you can't do that's like Jane Fonda looks [ __ ] amazing yeah yeah but then there's always gonna be that one spot we don't know like whether it's right around the eyes or the neck there's always something horrifying that age is exactly like it should so 90% of the face looks good but then there's that one part really oh [ __ ] that's an old lady the lips are tough the literary talk give it away lose moisture oh [ __ ] she's one of the Andrews Sisters but that mean it's the same thing when you see guys to get like hair plugs for everyone that goes really well you see a guy like I said guy walking down the street the other day and he had buzzed his hair but you could tell the whole front was plugs and it was just don't you love that I love a horror show of hair plugs yeah because it depends it was really well really really really [ __ ] about getting but not I think vacu so first we used to get the big smiley face Yeah right now they can just sort of vacuum the [ __ ] out and put it in and then it takes for some people and it doesn't for others but they're trying to say like someone was telling my podcast because I'm always like threatening to do it as a joke you know and they said that like that stem-cell [ __ ] if you shoot in the top of your head so I was joking because I'm gonna do this Eastern European tour coming up in January that I was gonna go over there and find some Transylvanian doctor over there to [ __ ] shoot it and I was going to come back with the redhead version of like Farrah Fawcett hair dress it wasn't that he wasn't old enough for it to be bad you probably just didn't want to spend a bunch of money yeah no it's it's themselves do it too they they have those they should they do those facials where they called vampire facials I don't know if that stem cells but they shoot like you're they do something with your blood then they put your blood back in I think it's a lot of whatever the [ __ ] is in platelets and then they shoot it into your face and oh yeah young people's blood some sort of fetus involved no yeah they just mush a fetus and they melt it down and shooting your face but no it's your own blood you know when they make avocado you know that bowl you got to drink it and shake hands with the devil do they do it into your face they're supposed to be very good for like wrinkles and moisture or whatever but it's legit I gotta say you've kind of been reverse aging man I mean if I had some of the pictures of you from back in the day like yeah you were hideous yeah you look like a beat cop [Laughter] come shoot Jimmy then you start doing the pull-up Emily you know a wrinkle on your face yeah my face is held up okay and there's other things should have made my face wrinkle free right yeah Caligula was right at work either no that helps it not smoking I think quitting smoking helped a lot too in 2001 yeah oh I forgot you smoked I smoked for 17 years yeah and I quit when you quit that helps a lot see guys have smoked with a 50 or go mm-hmm yeah I mean the benefit to never being attractive is that when you start to fall apart it's not like it's a heartbreak yeah no one no one says hey what happened to Sam exactly like I fell off yeah it doesn't doesn't matter that's the thing about all those beautiful people say that that's what like the ugliest people in the world would say [ __ ] like oh my god you see someone so what the [ __ ] happened to her it's like the same thing they happen to you you just you just fell off a curb right yeah nobody hit the pavement yeah I mean it's the better guy it gets you like later later in life is where it starts to reap the rewards but no matter how mediocre you are you know where you look you always feel it like I look at myself like [ __ ] you but way back whatever it is you still like you know it's still coming if you're a psychotic you eat like a tiny candy bar and you lose your gut like oh my god I'm getting fat again well but you know it's just the way you look at yourself he holds himself to a higher standard I don't feel it's good for you who know I did to shame him he is shaming me I don't like it i Jim has had food issues they are shared as far back as I have known and it's so brave the way he judges himself after a three musketeer [Laughter] the perfect candy bar form two three guys dress up his [ __ ] sailors Three Musketeers you do don't very tasty nougat you like it he likes the newbies he's nuts so what are you Wow you'd be surprised what do you are you what are you doing in town you're doing garden boating yeah then I'm gonna be at Madison Square Garden on November 7th with Paul virzi and Joe bartnick who's your warning Joe Barnack is a Pittsburgh guy via San Francisco completely unfiltered first time I son was at the punch line in San Francisco and he just just watching him in front of that crowd it was just like he'd do a joke they'd pull back and he'd the tag was even harder and after three jokes the crowd was just like I guess he's not stopping and I just want a ride it was one of my favorite the first time I ever saw a comic moments that I've had and he's just you know he's always writing new stuff and just him and virzi both always kill in front of me so I've always joked I don't bring any cupcakes on the road you know what I mean like that those people bring a weak act writing that makes them look good these guys both kill it and they keep me on my toes I did enjoy the promo video you put out announcing that you're gonna be a Madison Square Garden because you were just pointing up at the lack of championship banners really weren't worrying about endearing yourself to the New York on it's nobody it's East Coast you can break balls like this you know actually you can break balls like that pretty much around the country you wouldn't think the way in this climate but you can't people like it's like if somebody breaks my balls like swears like literally like warms my heart now it's I almost get like nostalgia right like did you make fun of my shirt all right guys [ __ ] great do more do more you know there is something fun about being attacked yeah I people who are funny it's fun to be attacked by people who you like and who attacks well yeah people that you like in that it's funny you know yeah bus station but it shows you're on the same level you know like you wouldn't call a [ __ ] person [ __ ] no you call mark [Laughter] no but yeah being attacked by someone who's good at dissecting it's fun it is fun it can be really fun it can be awful - you can go home and you start looking at all these little things like I never I never noticed that I never know you got that before I did oh no that was like clean they knew that about me I thought I was hiding them right [ __ ] right amount of amount of shirts that went to the Salvation Army after a night at the [ __ ] cellar I won't be wearing this anymore when Bobby came in with security guard pants for you then he came in but they had the stripe down the side like a security guard how long was the pounding for the entire night until he left it was it was it was a beating it was a beating all right but that's when it's really good yeah when their beatings that are so bad you can just fondly reflect remember the day that he walked in with those pants and it's like everybody who was there goes oh that was a class there's something fun about like when you're being attacked by people again who know you and who are accurate and who are funny at it and you're just covering up and taking a [ __ ] beat Heath and Bobby's fun were the ones that invented you know at some point just tapping out and running out of the club and I remember thinking the first time one of them did just leave back tomorrow ah have you ever thought that it was like okay I think he's gonna start hanging out I think he's one of us and you start going and you realize I go no this person is is not one of us at all this is a sensitive guy somebody who's upset about this oh yeah I can't name names but right I mean and somebody said something about somebody else about this female comic and the look of sadness and hope the way she looked at me like I wasn't gonna laugh to her reaction was even funnier and I [ __ ] died laughing and I died yeah it crushed her people got crushed down there I mean I get to but I mean you just had just from you laughing them you had to be strong enough to come back Sheena's like she never came back but I'm right I remember she was disappointed I had a couple of those like people were disappointed in because they were just straight-up [ __ ] mean I was inconsistent I'd be like a swell guy and then I would just say figure me out so people had hope with me you know what I mean so I just I definitely disappointed some people because you just didn't have that middle ground you just went right to the very worst no me and Bobby Kelly didn't know how to play the game like I learned how to play the game through Patrice Voss Norton and Keith where there was a light heartedness to it the way it was done and as far as I don't speak for Bobby but as far as like when we exchange notes like like it was mean right like you were trying to hurt somebody so we would start mmm Bobby like that was his tag everybody would be joking joking joking and he would just say something completely [ __ ] up and would just be totally silent he just go Bob Kelly so I feel like both of us had to learn kind of how to how to do that so and Bob would go to violence sometimes he wouldn't hit you but he will yeah woman I left Bob would threaten violence and you could tell Bob was getting ready to physically fight Bob gets upset Bob gets yeah we have what we got into one-timer talk about handler but we you know it'll hold your money and like somebody I said in paper-money will go away and the [ __ ] screaming match we got into on 43rd Street that we had to walk away because he was gonna get physical with me Bob over that Bob holds resentment some stupid ox

Channel: Jim and Sam Show

Views: 1,049,460

Keywords: Bill Burr, Jim Norton, Sam Roberts, Jim and Sam, Jim Norton and Sam Roberts, faction talk, sirius xm, 103, food documentaries, nutritionist, beards, looks, ugly, all things comedy, Paul Virzi, Ted Alexandro, Norm MacDonald, apology tour, Saudi Arabia, tortured, success, current climate, gender neutral bathrooms, breaking balls, shark tank, mark cuban, mr wonderful, instagram models, butt models, fake butts, bruce jenner, real housewives of orange county, bob kelly

Id: fTqQnDjEFFM

Length: 36min 25sec (2185 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 18 2018