Bill Burr’s Issues With The Airline Boarding Process - CONAN on TBS

you know in the last segment your you know your there's a lot you get worked up about you know and you've always been that way I've known you a long time you get worked up about studying happy universe for he was like things were better when I was three days my tunas guilty as charged yeah so here's the thing here's the thing are you now that you're playing master square garden you got all these fans you're extremely successful comedian are you able to enjoy your success now are you able to just have some fun that's a fact that you're a success yes I enjoy but I still you know the bane of my existence is I let little things bother me downloading new operating systems will just you know I bring a lot of tension into the house according to my wife yeah yeah one thing I've noticed we're always working on me you know like my wife is evidently some completed work like under museum glass I'm like that building that has scaffold she is she's a saint for putting up with me I I know but like my latest thing that's driving me nuts is I spent 20 years in the back of the plane getting treated like an animal and I finally worked my way up to the front of the plane Group one which means you get to board like it's your plane right you just you get to board yes yeah you sit in a chair that's the size for a human being there's a place for your bag yep yep right you get a little hot towel and all and then the second I get that all of a sudden now there's like these 20 groups that are like pre-boarding now like half the plane qualifies and they're getting on and I just sit there just like losing my you know it'll start softly it's just like anybody in uniform anybody in military so it's like alright alright but after like the 20th guy you just start being like if you've seen action [Applause] anybody with kids anybody with disabilities and they just say anybody with a red shirt hey it's Tony Tuesday at one time I saw this guy get on the plane okay he wasn't in uniform he didn't have kids he had all his limbs he wasn't limping she didn't have a cop he just walked on the plane it's like I always hated the anxiety of being in the back of the plane I just remember like the worst is whenever you would get your seat and you'd sit there know about ready to close the door and you'd have that empty seat next to you last like a poor man's first class you're like oh I'll bring the armrest up I can actually be great then all of a sudden some fat bastard you like Quint at the end of Jaws like slide I swear to god this is all true this dude got on he was so fat he was sitting next to me I was literally next to him and behind him smaller and he like folded his arm and his lat came out like like a jealous old western saloon thing so yeah so yeah that that motivates you to try to get to these layers 20 years you work your way up to the front and now still they won't let you that fat guys considered disabled because he can't stop so he gets on look at me groaning 90% of the world is starving to death [Applause] whoa okay what could you do could you do anything then could you get on the plane is there anything you could do I imagine there's something that I could be doing there's always something that I could be doing that's what I've learned being married you know what you should have done it this way I'm sorry that definitely is why mer what right now playing in the loop on what am i doing now you know this is the thing you know what it kills me it's just like if I could just fix my temper my wife she'd have nothing on me yeah nothing on me I worked my ass off and make a great living I like doing the dishes I'm a great dad all she has on me is just it's just I don't know like oh my overall vibe all she has on you is - your overall personality and violence of who you are is the owner there but I was this guy when she met me yeah exactly like I changed you always always flipping up were you sleeping out the day like when you met did you flip out and would you believe that she told me to go see that movie monster remember that movie with Charlie Theron yeah yeah yeah and everybody was saying how I owe my god it was unbelievable it wasn't like ah somebody shoved a tuna fish sandwich up my ass and I confused people with food so I like did he make like a big excuse for yeah she was a psycho killing people and she should have died but I'm like watching it feeling guilt somehow our fault why would having a tuna fish sandwich shoved up your butt make it equal because another man did it first so if you equate it I don't know sex with food I figure I figured out the idea but uh is she laughed when I said it she was dying laughing and kind of saw my point and I always hate when she says to me she'd just be like you know I just don't see what weight is that coming from where is that coming from he says like honey how many childhood stories do I have to tell you before you follow the breadcrumbs to this psycho that you're married I mean did you ever take a psychology class like you didn't see this coming right that's what it is it's not that she says that I'm a jerk it's just the nerve to be surprised [Laughter] all right I wish we had more time good God all right I feel like I do I help you at all but getting all this no cathartic it's cathartic cuz I'm gonna go home she's not gonna watch this she's over what I guess there's no one just she's not gonna watch she's not gonna watch it yeah yeah you can see bill on his latest nationwide tour 50 and he's starting to mellow I swear to God I am I'm getting the twinkle in my eye back at the TD at the TD Garden Boston on October 5th and Madison Square Garden Wow on Wednesday November 7 for more cities and dates thank you go to Bilborough dot-com Bilbo [Applause] you

Channel: undefined

Views: 10,858,974

Rating: 4.934042 out of 5

Keywords: Conan O'Brien Conan Conan (TV Series) TBS (TV Channel) Team Coco Celebrity Interviews Bill Burr

Id: 810qddPcsqo

Length: 7min 32sec (452 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 23 2018

Reddit Comments

[u/sakiwebo]

"It's not that she says that I'm a jerk. It's just, the nerve to be surprised"

lol

[u/SXOSXO]

You know Conan's genuinely laughing when he goes completely silent during the laugh.

[u/HurleyTheKid]

https://youtu.be/lW2pXu97Yvo

This is the other clip on him on the show that day. He calls out the crowd multiple times, which will never get old.

[u/komanderkyle]

Mirror for us dirty canadians

[u/PavlikNej]

Old Billy looks phenomenal. That quinoa does wonders.

[u/goal2004]

Relevant Key & Peele

[u/Shenaniganz08]

There are very few people that can make Conan laugh that hard

[u/CaptainTomCrunchJr]

That man Laughing into my left earphone ruined the whole thing for me.

[u/TheAlmightyKid]

Its always a treat when Bill Burr is on Conan. Beats having random celebs with uninteresting stories.