Best of the Worst: Plinketto #8

[Applause] J where is our celebrity guest I don't know I feel like we've been waiting here forever look the [ __ ] doorway and everything oh wait I think I seen there oh [ __ ] and get in position ladies and gentlemen please welcome our very special guests from The Ellen Show its rich Evans [Music] okay patent we're gonna do some plink kiddo today and we're gonna watch some terrible movies I'm pretty excited mr. Evans so what we have well our our first movie up here is called blood rage and it looks like it's a Thanksgiving slasher film adjust the tagline is that ain't cranberry sauce those those back in those and this always got a holiday slasher moving on we have oh yes well we have alien force which and I can't tell if the force itself is made up of aliens or is it a force to stop aliens well hopefully we'll land on it and we'll be able to find out let's get started Duke Nukem yeah oh my gosh he's in the Duke Nukem pose Wow alright and then our next one is of course demon cop nuff said after that we have mission kill Cameron Mitchell although that title I hate to be the grammar nazi' here but it's missing a : unless it's about a mission itself being killed but that should be mission : kill so like a metaphysical action movie like we have to find a way to kill the concept yeah exactly or we're experiencing mission kill you know we we have we planned it out and now it's not happening so we've got mission kill I thought it looked like him it is him I haven't confirmed that is Robert Ginty oh I'm sorry Ginty and Mitchell together yes Wow Wow well we got your letters America we have monster dog whoa a minute who's in that one mr. Evans Alice Cooper Alice Cooper in monster dogs aren't our next film is Duke Mitchell's gone with the Pope wait a minute do you mean Bela Lugosi meets a Brooklyn gorillas Duke Mitchell what [Laughter] Duke Mitchell was the Dean Martin - Sammy Petrillo's Jerry Lewis in the ripoff movie Bela Lugosi meets a brooklyn gorilla where they play like Martin and Lewis ripoff versions meeting Bela Lugosi and a gorilla in a jungle oh yes Hey look man you know heroin doesn't pay for itself what's next well you should be familiar with this one it's ratatouille oh wait reddit chewing the dollar store knockoff of ratatouille I hope I don't get sued for this Oh which we're going to follow up with Tim Ritter's killing spree oh this is Tim Ritter's killing sim Ritter's killing his it's his killing spree yes okay so it's not Lina work Miller's killing spree no no and so not Karl Franklin's killing spree not Kurosawa's killing spree Tim Tim Tim readers and then what's after killing spree to end dragon encounter twin so is that about encountering twin dragons or the twin dragons encounter something I think it's two twins who thought they could star and and you make an action movie featuring themselves encounter that doesn't really imply that something exciting that maybe they just encounter something then move on Liz that drug deal over there okay well that's interesting we encountered it and then we're and then how do we how do we end this smorgasbord what do we end on game of survival is that LEM room oh it's level we found a lembreaux movie oh now I'm excited who's who's LEM ro LEM ro from alien Private Eye really he's the coolest guy around easy fight choreography by Anthony Julian Tarantino any so many familiar names that are completely unfamiliar yeah exactly it's good to see Derek Zoolander getting work I'm feeling tired today and I don't feel like doing anything I don't have to because I'm a celebrity guest so Patton go drop that ball three times okay sure yeah yeah go right up there do it okay I'm coming coming up watch [Music] flatters kind of oh it's fine it's fine sure yeah okay one of these struts is a little alright as I looked at it yesterday it's fine okay um I just drop it anywhere anywhere you want all right anywhere okay come on fight for survival demon all right all right we're gonna watch that movie I mean the plots in the title but okay [Music] demon cop you know what he'll read you your last rites uh-huh you know what is mildly clever yeah Oh Cameron Mitchell he's a movie he's not in oh hello and with special effects from the creators of Terminator 2 in Leviathan so does that mean the creators of the movies are the creators of those special effects on those movies it means it was like The Apprentice special effects exact we fed it a coffee that had to go do all the work yeah it had to mix the latex and the guys who mix the latex on Leviathan she has easily defeated a string of gory murders a mad scientist trying to warn of a horrifying blood disease that turns men into monsters but it's all part of the same line if the answering questions of that situation answers question took us one here what so what are you saying me I was raised raised in a Christian environment it's fine leave it in okay keep going don't stop no matter what you got 38 scenes to shoot a good cop turned into the beast itself the nightmare world of demon cop they're looking for you [Music] tink I love you dear ago he was typing it's a spec script for Cheers salmon would he go to a baseball game we created Cheers write the pilot I wrote this role for you it's a show about nothing here we go come on game of survival are we really gonna watch that yeah did you have any doubt sir there's no doubt about that here their food is always guaranteed to be delicious we came from a great distance because everyone we heard from said the food is great it rat a toy that's the truth it was my second cousin Vinnie who told me about the year um listen Brad I'm kind of doing this internet show and they're doing we're watching uh watching ratatouille and I'm I'm making fun of it I'm making yeah I know okay but what the we're gonna you'll sue the skin off of them yes I'll I'll say that verbatim I'll let them know that verbatim okay then we're gonna we're shutting it off we're guys now I'm gonna try doing it this side reverse psychology yes oh no this was a mistake okay so alien force from the esteemed director of V world matrix oh good alien force ooh a fast-paced action film shocking images mm-hmm when it was that one sentence that's well that's that's the person who said the quote was shocking oh okay who I've never heard of so I'm assuming they're made up yeah exactly like somebody's like Ron forgue so yeah I'm shocking images no and I say a fast-paced action film I can put it on the box you can't stop me says film movie watcher oh god what Burt Ward's best roles since Batman and what was that quote that that Pauline Kael that's right that's that's right under the title so they thought that was important oh yeah okay that's what they have to sell this movie there are a lot of Burt Ward completists out there and you can't you can't you can't neglect that that revenue stream oh my god that's him it's so sad what let me see him oh that's so sad No Oh Burt okay Oh God and nobody would claim the Burt word quote by the way oh god I love this picture too I think this is gonna be amazing oh my god my god where'd he come from did he turn him into clothes or cut him in half alien force is sci-fi action at its finest its finest [Applause] Terminator 2 no it's a hit for a tour - see - what a meteor containing the souls of a billion predators crashes to earth the ruler of praxis 18 pert Lord sends an alien warrior trace Tyrone Wade to our planet mm-hmm his mission to track down the meteor and destroy it for his archrival gorrik shouldn't head all that cough syrup [Music] Wow finds it releases his evil brethren to destroy our world traces helped by the beautiful earthling sandy Roxanne Coyne I'm concerned that wasn't actually breakaway glass as they are pursued by the FBI and a vicious alien monster it's a desperate race with no less than the fate of the world at stake a new gorrik would get himself involved in this I knew it I knew it I don't know why I'm surprised I'm super hyped yeah I'm super hype okay our mission has become volatile an enemy is after our objective I don't understand all right this one this is gonna be game of survival I feel it oh god no oh god no it's survival chances favourite us [Laughter] and then finally game of survival heck yeah patent on board read this game of survival his prize for winning is his freedom game of survival is the story of Zane a young rebel warrior from another planet another alien warrior who is transported to earth not capitalized so you can so grammatically he sent to dirt to complete in a deadly game of survival against six of the most brutal warriors in the galaxy are we getting a dummy fall no water on earth Zayn is prevented by beautiful Cindy Sexton so the other one with Sandy and this one is Cindy together they conquer the Warriors and when Zane is freedom major sport guys they actually say they say together they conquer the Warriors and when Zane his freedom you know what they want you to have a tension-free view exactly yeah yeah this is something you can watch in a float tank but you know at the edge of the seat but they also want you relaxed so they either let you know everything's gonna be fine Oh Mickey Hill Cindy Copeman I wonder if she plays Cindy Sexton and Roosevelt Miller jr. star in this gut-wrenching act in action adventure thriller but not that gut-wrenching because you know he wins sue perb visual effects oh I thought that was another actress in the film sue that is a good one oh hi I'm sue herb superb visual effects and exceptional hand-to-hand combat choreography [Music] set this apart from other examples of the genre that's what a lab guy would say the effects and choreographies have the support from other examples of the genre so because it's so terrible please make a note of that in my abstract they're having the lame fight scene oh so it's something new and a dumpster [Music] I just know LEM Rose in it so I'm excited good ok let's do this thing [Music] this camera fades in we're just talking chit-chatting right rambling just like demon come completely rambling about nothing pans not say anything I think we've broken are you broken are we starting yeah these movies were all horrible I hate film now thank you no no just won't come off fine all right you're stuck here now you know how we feel Jesus well thank you for coming on the show Patton you're welcome I'm sorry that this was the worst line of a films we've ever done in the history of the series look I was really looking forward to this I was mean afternoon we're gonna watch some fun bad movies we try to warn people and an hour into it I I just was yeah I I wanted I wanted to have always been dead that is that's how I felt I wanted to have always been dead welcome to my life [Laughter] what do we watch it what is this are we traveling are we going to the planet what what is this are we gonna discuss these in the order we watch them in or does it even matter at this point which is a language even matter we just we could just make noise oh yeah I don't know why we don't just make weird clicking noises still more so yeah demon demon cop not a cop not a demon no it's wolf wolf man parole officer yeah yeah I used to be a gang member and he was my probation demon cop is the story of a demon that has passed on to other people through blood transfusions there is a parole officer who was shot in a drive-by and he gets demon blood in him this demon blood causes him to get revenge on people for things during the full moon but he also turns into a demon when it's not the full moon and that yes that's true oh my god yeah it happens in broad daylight yeah he's demon in broad daylight yeah that was only 25 minutes long so let's go say how long into the movie did it take you to figure out that this is what the movie was about an hour and a half okay the movie takes that long to figure out that that's what it's almost like yeah we and us and the movie were on the same pace with each other figuring out what was going on that because the movie didn't even put it together for itself yeah I really I really think they liked the later part of that movie like was the original whole movie and then they figured out this is way too short right ahead they had to stretch it up they had to pat it [Music] who are these swarthy going once ever know what's going on we missed that little piece of voiceover well now we're really lost so there's fog inside the building so let's just take random half-finished movies like like six of them cobble them together patch patch any of the holes together with like the back of people's head and a VR dialog and maybe it'll work you are faced with a demon that is transmitted by blood a 500 year old spirit of retribution whoever is infected will seek vengeance from whomever is responsible for personal injustice the demon metamorphosizes in relation to the progressive cycle of the Moon and it was it was flashback inside a flashback inside a flashback and there's even a moment near once we get to that final 25-minute part where the demon very specifically says no more flashbacks yes now is like the movie got out first yes exactly yeah yeah even he was enough I don't know if we can properly explain in words how incomprehensible the first hour of this movie was what looks great cool shop but didn't link up to anything we just saw things this was that that explains common logic we were desperately trying to figure out what the hell and we named the six different move there were six different films there was the blonde lady like the the girlfriend / she was a girlfriend a wife with the gun that was really sad and their woman then there were the two detectives a weird fight sequence in the middle done point of view but also not point of view where there were like a chorus line of detectives yeah good as kill where came out of the darkness it was so bizarre it was like the movie just willed them into existence and ran beheading [Music] [Applause] just the news [Music] completely random beheading up the end the only one all right that's right wolf cub or cop that's the thing I'll give this movie credit there is and this is all by accident I won't say that I won't give the director credit for a skill I'll give the movie credit for capturing something by happenstance where in attempting to do a Robert Altman shot they failed but did a nice David Copperfield illusion actually kind of nice yes oh my god I was warning areas of the German accent your city of is an alien you're not you're not shooting people [Laughter] ma'am could you get up ma'am could you get yeah ma'am you're in the show where'd everybody go no now this what ma'am oh and then there was the fake psychic lady who we don't realize is it fake psychic until the guy calls her a fake psychic the end of what at the very end of them in the wheelchair I guess I wanted to know if it was him all along in all actuality you're just a damn good actress and not really a psychic psychic she was used to be a gang member and she used to be a gang member I thought she said I used to be a gay man who he also didn't know was in a wheelchair until the very end of the very very your dialog may have also been a demon cup at some point and yeah exactly like she knew either but I couldn't understand it was she a demon copper was she a gangbanger who lost her legs like she was a former gangbanger who became crippled who became a cop and then became crippled yes and then became a psychic that has meetings with the cops in a morgue yeah why was she in the morgue for like a he's in like maybe a scene but that's the guy that he's driving and the guy hits his windshield and wolf that's demon cop was it was demon wolf cop knows he's got the guy who lands on the hood and smears cranberry sauce okay we didn't know that his demon cop when that scene happens and we didn't know that was demon cop until an hour he was like into the film [Music] and by the way the three dangerous gang members that he fights they're dangerous gang activity is loitering and then hassling the mailman yeah those are there those are the things that they're doing punishable by death yes he is a demon cop he is a demon cop except he's not really demon and he's not really exactly is the parole officer officer I will say though after the first hour where we had no [ __ ] clue what was going on wearing I'm wearing a Hawaiian shirt where did you get that literally in Hawaii he just reached over and grabbed it in Hawaii like wolf cop when he reached out an entirely different thing he's not a demon demon don't turn it demons during the full moon he's a werewolf god damn it and he reached him from the woods to grab his wife who was indoors okay the conversational detour and coldest act that you just saw where Mike started talking about his [ __ ] Hawaiian shirt for no reason and then it went nowhere and then he came I can they just perfectly recreated the flow yeah dialogue and plot demon copy you just experienced what we experienced watching this movie in real life you're one that is literally how this movie proceeds yeah where they begin a conversation or a scene and they cut to an unrelated scene where something is making no sense wait wait we have to reenact that but we all have to be turned around so you all right or agreement so we just near man Rainer deep reached in from outside to grab his wife we can't hear what you're saying and he had the framing the either frame from the eye up or in one case cuz it cuz you pointed out they clearly couldn't get that German guy for the one seen sitting on the bed and perfectly and insultingly like frames his man boobs while he's sitting there talking on the phone and like I just I just picture the actor going I get to keep my dignity in this right like oh yeah don't even worry about it yeah yeah don't show my face show my boobs yeah Norma myths Craigslist under myths a section on Craigslist yeah myths or moobs okay if the authorities in Denver think these murders are gang-related for one second they've got another thing coming just run by a program that would just randomly generate sentences but then the last half hour is the best thing ever oh he's driving driving No why did this movie something and amazing hope that happen just be thankful it happened they finally got all the exposition out of the way it only took an hour this is the comeback of the century we have to the last half-hour was you're right not only was the last half-hour of the original film it's the one film one part of the film that it's not dim it's actually takes place in daylight [Music] oh holy [ __ ] [ __ ] amazing yeah and but their scenes that are clearly just the makeup test for the demon and they'd had to work it into the narrative well that's the weird thing is I guess the demon cop can't talk so he uses a typewriter and types up a note to his beloved later on he talks and even says like when he bends that gun burgos I could finish that I can name that tune in one note yeah [Music] and we're like what does that have to do you have to point out that there was a game show that like no one under 1500 watch I can name a tune in 100 he's going forward watch alright is that like a like a action liner I think that's supposed to be like is supposed to be like except there's no justification dozen yeah context yeah it's not quite lineup at all but he but he types up a note to his ladylove and she reads it but we hear his voiceover as the demon cop reading the note and he sounds like Cookie Monster the makeups not too bad but we theorize that they only had like a day or two where the makeup looked good and then it just started to tear yeah yeah and that's why they didn't have it for the rest of the film I think we're all exposed to use this once yeah doesn't look so great for the end action scene that takes place in someone's front lawn although the close-up of the neighbor yeah it was well well demon cop has a moment of rage and he picks up a lawn like an outdoor table and awkwardly throws it and then we cut the neighbor lady that we'd never seen before or after it wasn't who is the by the way that's the most horrified anyone is at anything demon cop does and and up to that point he's beheaded people and you know and no one is as horrified as when he throws lawn furniture yeah that's the most horrified reaction in the whole we took the glass off the table yeah just throw in the frame it's okay Kathy hypothetically could they have filmed a TV screen just to disguise the fact that they didn't couple the other different movies and sometimes it's shot on video and sometimes it's shot on film sometimes it's shot on super 8 it's all a mystery I think there's less labor-intensive ways to hide that rich always finding the thing I miss never underestimate the power of stupidity yeah that's true shall we point out Cameron Mitchell our homeboy Cameron Mitchell opens and ends the movie these are the files of the Damned the stories of those poor depraved souls shot in his house cuz there was another movie yeah yeah yeah the tomb it's that sign I saw I saw the reading light and I was like that's from the tomb as you know your own recent studies involve myths of ancient blood drinking demons can we pause cuz I'm gonna need another one of these I'm realizing my soul is screaming right now you were do you regret this with every five I really do I couldn't I have a gig tomorrow night my last gig was on Sunday night I could have flown home been with my wife and I stuck and drove to Milwaukee and stayed here you guys come on not worth it you miss right back please include all this and the thing I want people to know any other any slumming celebrities like I'm gonna be real I'm gonna connect with the YouTube generation I'm gonna go on this [ __ ] no this is a [ __ ] nightmare holy doing Mount [ __ ] [Music] we're moving out alien force and now we're done with alien force and let's move on to have survival know like alien force what's it all about well alien force is Burt Ward's bus role since Batman pirates gorrik is the last of the Jadeveon soul suckers to avoid capture according to the tape they put him in a little rubber hat including according to an unattributed quote it's not for its mom yeah now there's no there's no actual no one claimed that quote we've seen that quite a bit on movies that we do on the show where there's an unattributed no we delete many times yeah it's like they're trying to trick people alien forces filmed by Ron Ford a famous director starring film star Randall Malone random alone since area Oh Carmen not you and a bunch of other guys rich you were saying the the cover looks like some sort of nuke Dook Dook Dook oh did you say nuke Duke I did Jason expert he's seen a video game system no well oh my god someone's gonna use that clip that's gonna nuke them it's the low buddy you should say that's a rich Oh what's the toy story for character Duke kaboom right Duke kaboom the Canadian Evel Knievel ripoff okay alright so Duke kaboom stars hey I am for us and we have Burt Ward aka Robin Ward as we usually call from he plays the the omniscient emperor of the universe who is also wearing some kind of vampire helmet go now and don't screw up but omnipresent pricks and I and then they dragged him out into the middle of the desert they had six minutes to film Burt one yeah I'm just picturing that though where it's like they you know they throw them in a car and they drive out to the middle of nowhere and then that walk yeah to where they ended up filming the scene and they don't forward thinking all of the tire tracks and footprints day to make sure state no one go beyond this one because we need yeah these shots of Burt Ward with no you know disturbed has to have a believability clause it has to look like an alien world yeah yeah do you know what Burt Ward was thinking he was thinking oh god I hope this is how it ends [Laughter] although I won't relate I'll give him credit though I do love that he plays an all-powerful alien being as the most annoyed life-form in the galaxy where he's because if you were an omniscient all intelligent being it would be like dealing with idiots that's that would be your life and it would drive you insane and he is just oh that's kind of I kind of like that it possesses inherent fighting skills cunning lightning reflexes nerves of steel things which you lack in abundance but what you'll need to complete your assignment is nailing this part this is his best role since Batman register don't be prison Proximus on it it's it's also kind of like the camera Mitchell thing where you here's this here's a name you know and then they they're in one location and they're in two minutes of your movie space cup can you hear me it's me the chief of the space police yes hello can you hear me yeah they were smart enough to figure out a way though to make the most efficient use they possibly could have burnt Warren because he's constantly showing up on dude new comes wristwatch now it's a handheld but he's always just a really iPhone that's what they used to look like it's right yeah but they can't take the effort to like motion track it like you see his hand move and the bad that's just so newbie is like okay they try yeah right and there's some there are some martial arts sequences that actually look like Oh some they really landed or they worked out like and in the same sequence are a couple of kicks and punches that look terrible and then in the same sequence a couple that look really good like wow they have [Music] and a very very bad alien costume oh now he's gonna fight the alien yes please yes kick kick fight the alien I mean it's a terrible problem yeah what if it was an alien in disguise wearing like a Halloween alien costume and maybe the actual alien underneath there looked really good and we just didn't see it because it was wearing a cheap raw a Lia basket right there is that part when we see the alien like like completely shirtless and all they had was the alien masks and latex body makeup ragout right right it was in charge of that price to them for going through the effort of actually using the body makeup yeah that's true yeah the other t-shirt a Roswell New Mexico t-shirt and this has these have a connection in that there is a street gang at the beginning that is the most diverse street gang of like it almost feel it's like an old prospector that will be a better movie this old prospector has found a way to gather like there's a skinhead there's an african-american guy there's a weird kind of New Wave looking dude there's a Latino in pajamas he's from the pajama game the pajama gang what who else is there's so many differences though there's like a redneck like Lynyrd Skynyrd looking dude yeah what we were saying it was like a cyrus from the Warriors I wanted to unite all the gangs this is his dream except that Cyrus should be an old prospector yeah in the desert that's who's gonna gather them all up yeah one of the rare movies where all of the goofy comic relief just makes you immediately tired or a comedy scene this somebody thirsty tonight I see wake me up later I'll just cut that part of the frame out replace it I'll just put a still image of you watching the screen okay like whenever they go yeah you got like this'll like nothing I'm like can they just go back to either punching or talking about the alien planet cuz this is death the hotel guy the that superstar that's movie what's the name film star Rondo Brandel Malone Hush Puppies I understand I really do and then there's that other weird guy that comes and talks to him and there's that that was the director that was Ron boy Ron horn that was a legend we know all these characters Ron Ford has a great film called deadly scavengers this this isn't our first Ron ford low but run Ford knows quality he made v-world matrix and he's desperately trying to achieve terminator there's elements of the hidden in this there's a lot of like jumping into other bodies the borrower it's just like stuff that they got Mme they got some pretty good martial artists to do some fun scenes that are genuinely fun to watch and then they went the Griffith Park and kind of kicked each other for a little while yeah yeah the movie made sense should we talk about the AG the MacGuffin by number guessing there's an egg bad guy come to destroy earth good guide to protect Earth it's Terminator with aliens instead of robots from the future and Sark and and and and very very bad I mean and then he he ultimately he defeats I want to now I want to say good Nick enough I think that's a girl from now right that's his name he's giving it up his or his um he just kind of punches him to death [Music] yeah he rips off his arm but doc did that is way before he defeats him though the arm is almost the guy layout which has got the hole that he throws his own arm to knock the [ __ ] gun out of his hands disarms him with his arm [Music] [Applause] [Music] did he throw them in the water that destroyed the egg it was the same water that the bad guy was gonna use to awaken the egg yeah yeah that okay yeah there's a thing where there's a circle we'll get there but if you put something in it freeze the mantra somehow they know both of these areas from the lake and the lake by the way is broken it's gonna be in the news tomorrow Patton Oswalt and checks himself into mental institution I saw so many people fighting in the woods by the end of tonight I don't remember what area because we're about to go into I was gonna say this is that black mussels no that's a whole other method different film that's a different this is the point we're at where the movies are blending together see they're all blending together another thing that didn't help us in terms of Tonia's part is I wonder are these are all late 80s or 1990 films yeah so there was a very there's a homogeneous conception and all these songs of what Punk's are like what like alien technology would look like it that kind of blend there's not even a homogeneous depiction of gangs in the movie what are you talking about what I'm saying is eat but each gang each movie that has similar non homogenous versions of gangs in the movie because remember in the late 80s it was all like yeah because because they all these guys knew about gang fighters was from like watching Michael Jackson's beat it video or like where they would always have multiracial gangs yeah yeah there's even the bad jacket yeah oh my god Oh bad is a it's an acronym I guess we never learned what it's for but badass dude this is the most embarrassing badass dude okay sure so the acronym for bad is something longer that means the exact same thing yes okay all right rich all right rich [Laughter] what does she know how to hotwire a car was an old boyfriend taught her to hurt her scuzzbag old boyfriend my god this makes too much sense are we starting to miss demon cop at least in demon come if you didn't like something had changed every two minutes another movie well I do like the fact that it alien force ends with a static shot of bird walking away yeah into the desert in a wizard costume well then well that was him walking off the side and it was yet he was every frame of footage we have of Burt Ward he's leaving he's going to yeah they did they did have to use every inch yeah every frame of film is shot they're gonna we're gonna overusing it mr. Ward well that's something to point out because then that right it's using every inch of Burt Ward was a different film I just like that alien force ends [Laughter] you game of survival games of survival well you know what under the - it's like picked your own title it really it what do you want to be called yeah what works for you yeah I mean it was one get your own shoes your shoes your own time you know what movie two titles are fluid fluid it depends on the person watching it yeah you know well game a survival pet no no my favorite movie is jaw good okay the plot of game of survival a lot of game of survival weirdly enough is involves an interstellar spherical object that is being sought after by various characters they find words in it it ends in a fight in the woods although in this case this is a very cranky live-action version of those Street Fighter games where they introduce a a collection of interstellar badass warriors with different skills who are then beamed down to earth and one of our warriors we saw at the beginning lives in a a weird it's an alien planet but it looks like Earth in the post apocalypse because there are cardboard covered dune buggies and when I say cardboard I mean there is a clear shot when they're closing the top of it where you can see the shipping instructions that for the for the washing machine that the Box yes the whole yeah and then they chase them this is this car gonna rattle itself into pieces before it even gets to them Oh looks like it really should have hit them and he is put into a prison and all of the other top warriors eccentric because this this guy is a killer this guy is the middle and our hero is sent because he throws poop at his jailer which makes him one of the most vicious beings on the planet but the thing to remember about game of survival and this is outlined by the aliens in the beginning they gave all the exposition to the characters that we couldn't understand okay we're good take over the galaxy okay easy to film and the abandoned warehouse district wait a minute is this this is involved another alien egg well at a later point in the movie they come back to him and it's not only that that you can't understand them because of the filter they have on the voice it's like they lowered the volume it's like an Andy Kaufman prank the movie is [ __ ] bigger yeah there is yet it comes to this weird dramatic point and they cut back to the ship and it's just the lino glowing but very very quietly earth that's it that's all you hear I know was this the film with the bar and Burbank yes this includes a scene inside of a bar called tinhorn flats which is on Magnolia near Buena Vista and I used to go there all the time when I lived at Magnolia and Lincoln and it is actually a delightful kind of country-western bar with swinging western doors a they make very good cheeseburgers they have a very nice bar and they have two very nice pool tables which is so clear when you watch the fight scene that the owners went you can shoot in here you cannot slam anything on these pool tables because the the two guys are fighting and I've never seen another guy laid more gently onto a pool table but he reacts as if he's just been slammed with like a hundred pounds per square inch of force it's the weirdest thing nice to live right near this bar I know what this bar is I'm not kidding God holy [ __ ] are you an extra in the scene I would have been nineteen oh boy oh my god do you remember a night yeah I remember this well that's the whole movie is just scene after scene of characters fighting it's basically Highlander like it's like there can only be only one so it's yeah the they're fighting til there's one person left to have the ball but we don't know what the that means they won the contest but what does that mean don't think it beamed back about the ship and the edits the honor is the head alien going you're so cool I think so and then the guy goes no you suck how dare you how dare you and then he just kills him so the movies written by a teenager like right and then okay who are the Warriors again it's our hero yeah LEM Rome oh we're calling him lembreaux because it's the same actor in this movie he's called yeah something so I don't think he's inner struggle like Andrew Dice Clay bass yeah there's the Peter Peter Dinklage then there's that then there's a little person who's the weird bow and arrow warrior yeah then there's the muscular black guy with the Jesus chains yeah just like in um demon [ __ ] then there's the the fight choreographer for the film who looks like a Ren Faire he kind of has this delight but then there's the other guy there's a guy that's a turkey like the big muscular guy with a big turkey leg then there's the punk black muscles of this the guys white black muscles and white muscles that's a movie Idol punk the one who screams at the chicken I mean are we missing anyone else well you're missing the female lead insert comical name here oh I feel ashamed for that but man what was her name though in the film indeed sexes in the Sexton in the sex town but played by Andy Sexton played by Cindy coat man oh I need to go next door to pick something up for my friend okay mm-hmm that lady can act why did they put you in prison on my planet Elvis impersonation is illegal which means that the actress we're gonna deal with being called a different name like right respond yeah you should oh my god yeah maybe she was called like Darlene and I meant she just never does like this action scene where they're trying to tell me what else she only responded to her real name nose and game of survival needs to be have credit too because they really really leaned into filming the depressing San Fernando Valley Hollywood apartment building horrible depressing Lobby and their crappy elevator it's there to go up two floors that's it and then the super depressing apartment where she inexplicably has New Wave concert lighting behind her yeah right for no reason this movie in this movie feature women with very depressing apartment art really grim ate like late 80s you know like just go buy it at Spencer's gifts pressing art yeah depressing uh like like the chessboard with the wine glass like grows on it or that kind of look it just really we it's like you your brain just stopped what are you trying to like you were about to make a joke and then your ass down Wow too depressing I won't sit well I'm watching a joke dying your frontal it has the precinct you'll get it out skim a minute let's give them a second won't you please help your donation if you can so Mike's Joseph's right for the phrase email do it for the price of a cup of coffee you can help Mike what is the building everyone who lives in apartment the precinct what is the building everyone lives in don't like everyone's obsessing earth what was the joke just a joke I don't know it's it's like it wasn't even a joke my god your brain shut down making an observation I feel like Burt Ward in the desert annoyed and wanting to go home yeah yeah famous rebel features a woman named Harley who could not be hit in the head more oh right face of a film she's punched she's clobbered a head and shot in the head [Music] and we know right yeah alien ports oh my god you see this is what these things dude erased no no no he's right no alien oh my agent it's both movies are about aliens who come to LA look for a ball - look for a ball and then they end up in the woods with a woman yes in alien force he takes the woman to his planet in game of survival he stays on earth yeah the woman it's the greater that's what makes them different man is true yeah one time just tonight there's a time you're holding the ball at that time you're the most awesome warrior and deserving of the blessing the ticking clock element is when they run out of film remember with the first check to cater it bounces that a bird this has been a wasted day a wasted day thus wasted life for us yeah this is every day for us fast forwarding to my my daughter when she's in her 40s going remember that summer when I was 10 it was just that day you missed that one day yeah you missed a special day in my life because you were watching LEM ro beat a guy in the woods you literally you came to from literally the worst max-eye funeral my daughter's gonna show these three films and go this is the reason that he lost a day with me and in the summer of 2000 but you know you know I I need to I need to track down the movie that I thought I missed my special day for I need to see what it was oh I was Bert Ward's best roles it really wasn't your father didn't love it okay we're done with these I guess yeah this is the point of the session where we pick best of the worst Smike what is best of the worst oh my god [Music] what was this call of them oh dude what hop yeah game of survival with Lamar oh but why patented pressing building everyone lives in Mike the depressing building that is life I will also say game of survival only because it had a coherent plot of I like the idea of bringing together six or seven extreme characters and having them fight and they found a good structure to do that in and the appearance of tinhorn flats was heartwarming but of these I actually didn't like I liked I disliked alien force more than I disliked demon cop only because demon cop I could III might interest was kept going what in the [ __ ] is like I truly didn't know what was gonna happen next this movie is all terrible but nothing no terrible element lasts for more than two minutes and then it could be something else rich ok you're gonna hate me because I know what you're gonna vote for you do yeah I'm going for game of survival okay I am the demon cop the deal end of demon cop is amazing it really is the last half hour but first what felt like seven hours is associate to get to that it doesn't make up for it no game of survival for aliens walking around on earth which is normally terrible there's there's some hints of some fun things like some fun characters all the action is terrible the action is terrible but what I see in game of survival is like somebody can take this make something fun out of it maybe sure well like I said it's like Highlander basically all these people duking it out whoever's the final one I thought that was interesting and that's why I'm giving it to game slash games I'm surviving alright demon cop is the worst thing we've ever watched on best of the worst and they might pick for best of the word witness that is the worst thing you've ever watched uh it's like that was here for the worst thing you've ever seen possibly we've watched a lot of horrible [ __ ] and I think we've said multiple times that whatever episode it is we've said it's the worst thing we've ever watched demon cop might be the last half-hour makes up for a lot the last half-hour I think is [ __ ] phenomenal demon counter what yeah now right I am right I'm changing my vote oh my god survival Sudan and even though the first hour is awful like we were we never wanted to understand a movie more that is true really my party gear it out yeah it's like trying to crack a code yeah the worst type of engagement it is it is the Antonioni of shitty direct-to-video films where I don't know what the [ __ ] is going on if nothing else the whole movie is worth it for the scene the demon Cobb throws a table and they cut to the person and then the most horrified in the house it's not even her table but she's walking through a table I've had nightmares about this day so we got I guess if you change the road that we got to demon cops we got to game of survivals why it's a tie should we destroy alien foresters yeah yeah yeah it wasn't like horrible but it was coming though it was a slog yeah yeah you know sorry Ron forward yeah you'll see the clip right here what the [ __ ] is this you know you're not gonna cut away to anything what are you just gonna let me look like an idiot I don't know what you're doing the cuts of the clip what clip what clip they're telling me I need to go back to the hospital now say hi to Ron board for me what grown adult when we're pac-man sure [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: RedLetterMedia

Views: 2,763,765

Keywords: redlettermedia, red letter media, red, letter, media, plinkett, half in the bag, mike stoklasa, jay bauman, rich evans, plinketto

Id: t4s0KT_z98A

Length: 63min 48sec (3828 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 06 2019