Best of Andy Dwyer | Parks and Recreation

oh I guess while you get your medicine I'll just stroll to the candy Islesboro won't get any you can buy two candies two can have you I have the flu super nauseated for a few days a lot of barfing it's a total disaster plus I have a ton of work to do so I need the good stuff the Mariah needs to sing tonight stuff you don't look flushed no signs of fever that doesn't seem like the flu it's the flu I mean I don't think it could be anything this counts as one let's say I typed your symptoms into the thing up here and it says you could have network connectivity problems let's do Ron Swanson's office yes I will transfer you I just dropped another call oh hey Ron hey shiny shoes you got there oh hey I was just think oh no actually it looks like I scuffed this one do you need your money back Ron cuz I already spent it really how did never mind uh I think I'll just take another full polish can I cut in line again I feel right at home as a shoeshine I have no idea what I'm doing but I know I'm doing it really really well do you remember anything about a key or April doing anything unusual that day she did make a stop by the shoeshine stand before he left because she wanted to drop something off for Andy she had a real bad crush on him Oh baby you had a crush on me that's embarrassing we're married too you really shouldn't have dug that out of the dumpster I had to also I had a banana on the way over here sorry and I get why you don't want anyone to know about Duke silver and you don't have to your secret is safe with me to even it out I'm gonna tell you all of my secrets oh no that's not necessary I once forgot to brush my teeth for five weeks I didn't actually sell my last card as forgot where I parked it I don't know who Al Gore is and at this point I'm too afraid to ask when they say 2% milk I don't know what the other 98% is when I was a baby my head was so big scientists experiments on me I once threw beer as Swann and then it attacked my niece Rebecca that'll do Andrew you don't have to play the unity concert but don't quit music please whoa check out the new digs this place is insane thanks for coming guys I'm super swamped and I need your help Pass you came down here to pass on helping me yeah I wanted to see what your face look like when I said no it was totally worth it Andy you okay I'm fine it's just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I'm always tired also I can't sleep I'm overeating gonna melt hobbies interests me ever since Andy failed the police academy exam his self-esteem has hit rock bottom he's always sad and sweaty he's usually happy and sweaty we're not giving up on this he's not the only musician in town Andy yeah I don't know listen I don't really feel like playing right now Please Please Please Please Please Please I don't even have children's songs my last song I wrote was called sex hair well just take the word sex and change it to pickle pickle you've got pickle hair baby and you got it from me sounds like it's about sex I'm in I gotta grab my guitar for my house I'll be back shortly yeah hey guys we have a solution and there's always a solution and your motives are pure you have two broken bones in your right arm and four in your hand that's the side that hurts how soon until he's better we'll set the fractures I'd like to keep him overnight for observation is there any chance you can fix me in the next ten minutes sure I'll just advance medical science 30 years great can mouse rat play without you they tried once they're called rat and mouse and they're awful but you have got to find somebody there's an old saying show business the show must go wrong everything always goes wrong and you just have to deal with it we can't believer at Hogwarts no that's Buckingham Palace Hogwarts is fictional do you know that it's important to me that you know that Iran can I ask you kind of an important question you know like when you go to the ATM and you get money is there an actual guy standing behind the wall who slides dollar bills in there no yeah this robots Oh actually you know what I do have a serious question in a movie predator can you rub any kind of mud on yourself to prevent predator from seeing you with this thermal heat signature site or is it that sucks are you hurt no all good all good oops except for my mouth oh whoa five-second rule nope ah come on we'd better get you to a dentist mm-hmm mighty buddy what are we doing we didn't get a single thing that Ben told us - sure we did we got the marshmallow shooter X I think it's on the list but I want it I want it too but I also kind of want my own Fork just cuz you eat really slow which is cute but also super annoying fine what what's wrong nothing it's just adults are boring and I hate them and I don't want to buy all the stupid boring adult stuff and become boring adults hey listen to me yes we're gonna get a dish rack and shower curtains and a cutting board but if you think for one second I'm not also gonna get that marshmallow shooter so that I can shoot you in the face with marshmallows when you're asleep then you're the dumbest woman I know I'm gonna make me cry the receptionist so she'll fit you in as soon as there's an opening if you're alright I'm gonna head back to the park real quick real quick what do you know what my social security numbers or if I'm allergic to anything I don't like corn except for that down or will that be confusing because I do like candy corn Oh Ron what a mess here let me help you all I wanted was two hours where I got to forget that I was a parent but look I found all three differences those are two completely different pictures well you will not be hiring anyone because my department is just finishing up a major project I think you'll agree that this department could use a little leadership and your Pawnee High prom king and queen are Lucy Taylor and ND Dwyer what I broke the box and I threw away all the votes and I voted for you a thousand guys and she'd get on up there King Dwyer not without my cool hi pani high as your prom king I am your ruler salads my first decree of power is to declare that the prom queen shall be my wife April Ludgate who is the best thing that's ever happened who came to prom even though she hates it give me this always next year no there isn't I'm a senior this is your wife how old are you he's 33 and I'm 47 / immortal get out Oh Andy tell me what happened I was reading an encyclopedia and I tripped or fell over and hit my head or brain helmet you call it yeah he sneezed and smacked his head against the wall yeah that sounds about right well if it's a concussion it's extremely mild so I wouldn't worry about it anything else bothering you nope okay well I mean yeah I've got a weird rash in my knee pit area and my tongue on this side doesn't taste anything anymore sometimes when I walk my ankles make like a weird rattle snake sound what else things that are far away from my eyes are fuzzy I once ate a Twix with the wrapper on it and I've never seen the wrapper come out also I've swallowed every piece of gum that I've chewed for the past 25 years I don't know broke my thumb when the way over here just fix me well I can help you with the thumb and I'll have to give you referrals for specialists for the other thousand things Wow thanks for nothing dr. Harris you're welcome [Music]

Channel: Parks and Recreation

Views: 3,651,752

Keywords: Parks And Rec, Chris Pratt, Amy Poehler, Leslie Knope, Ron Swanson, Parks And Rec Bloopers, Parks and Recreation, Andy Dwyer, April Ludgate, Leslie and Ben, Tom Haverford, Aziz Ansari, marvel, avengers, stan lee, chris, pratt, full episode, pranks, fails, funniest clips, fail compilation, mouse rat, guardians of the galaxy, jurassic world, stan, lee, visitors, jennifer lawrence, groot, film bloopers, bloopers

Id: DonD68byO0o

Length: 10min 5sec (605 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 16 2019