Attempting 5 Min Crafts So You Don't Have Too...

hello everybody and welcome back to my youtube channel or welcome to my youtube channel i'm call me chris and you can call me chris and uh how you doing you know okay i feel like you're not having the best day since you're not having the best day i'll make you feel better by telling you that i spelled scalding hot starbucks coffee in my crotch this morning while i was driving and almost died that's how my day started anyway today we are gonna be watching and uh attempting some five minute craft beauty hacks if you will because i need some tips i need tips not like that but those kind of tips you nasty let's just get into it all right let's do this all right first things first we got an almond and a lighter fantastic first one's plain with fire love it how you got nutty eyeliner nut liner i'm not gonna brand that okay let's burn some almonds i don't know and i'm back with fire which i shouldn't be trusted with and an almond i had to dig through a trail mix bag for like 15 minutes to find this i almost used a cashew which just would have been like real angsty so we got an almond and i have a mirror this time so let's go okay let's burn this probably shouldn't be doing this around all this okay it's fine will it catch on fire did it nevermind oh my god i'm supposed to put this to my eye scalding hot almond all right let's go through this oh god it smells like danger i already have eyeliner on but we're just going to add to it oh that yo it kind of works oh let me burn some more you imagine every morning just like waking up digging through a bag almonds and lighting them on fire just to do your makeup probably cheaper i burn myself worth it for the views oh it's kind of hot now i just burnt myself for nothing okay next i have a weird feeling i'm gonna get ugly and ugly as this video goes on next we got lashes with lash glue okay okay we're not putting on lashes i already have lashes on lash why are you putting it on your lip oh my god i've always wanted to get my lips done but who needs it let's go get some lash glue yes five dollars getting your lips done i actually actually have no idea how expensive that is but i hate needles so maybe this will be the perfect solution i want that lip to stick i she didn't do it on the bottom but like i might i'm gonna do it on the bottom because like why not you know go above and beyond let's wait for that to get nice oh that that doesn't look good that's what she said oh god i hate myself right now okay wait till it dries a little bit i have so much faith in this i want it to work just like hold my lip up in the sun down perfect now we wait this is my job it's kind of sad no it's not working i just want thick lips come on maybe i shouldn't have had makeup on my face before i did this i'm gonna try again determined five minute crafts might be onto something there's the thumbnail okay we really gotta wait for this to dry more ultimate drying fan oh my god yes oh my god wait it kind of worked it looks so natural i got a model i hate it but i love it you know are you kidding me right now oh my god you look like the fourth of july it makes me on a hot dog real bad oh no it came off all right you know what it works if you want lips for like five seconds like a quick selfie and you also want to look like you work in a certain line of business you're great you're good okay next okay that took eight years to get off my face but here we go let's look at the next one broccoli broccoli broccoli freckles she looks fantastic let's do it i don't know if i have broccoli can i use a different fruit a vegetable a carrot i don't know i don't try guys i actually have broccoli is it expired yes comment down below if you have expired vegetables in your fridge right now that's nasty all right we can still use it though okay i'm gonna put a little bit of this brow on here because it's the only brown stuff i have just take some of this and we'll smack it on there i don't know this is not gonna work and if it does maybe i have a reason to actually buy broccoli because i'm not gonna ever eat it oh now i got broccoli in my pomade god damn it perfect great let's do it wait oh wait i got broccoli on my face okay like wait is this working oh i took it too far oh okay oh no looks like somebody took a on my face i don't want it let's get all this broccoli off my face the only downfall of this is you'll get excess broccoli on your face you know i've always wanted freckles oh no i look like oliver twist please sam i have some mole if less is bad more must be better you know what i think i took it a little too far but freckles i'm not gonna take them off this is how i'm gonna look for the rest of the video next okay yeah we're edging on a scandal at this point so i'm just gonna leave it like that okay next we got berries and uh tape on the lips why can't oh oh okay yeah okay just to keep it from getting on the sides oh god that worked way too well that way okay let's let's let's try it i don't even know if i have berries all i have is ramen noodles in my house so guys i have berries well a couple a couple that weren't moldy i'm just i don't have a i don't have anything to smush it with so i'm just gonna use my finger we are smooshing that seems good enough all right i got the tip i'm ready to go let's do this all right so she went here i guess i should do smaller ones yeah uh-huh i mean this is good i mean i suck at putting on lipstick so this might be like really handy yeah i got a phone call from my manager as i was doing this he's not surprised it's fine reapplying amazing why can't i just put regular lipstick on why does it need to be berries oh i did a terrible tape job get on my finger you am i birdie now this isn't working oh my god you look like a murderer hello this isn't working change of plans i'm gonna get lipstick okay let's fix this tape because she's wilding right now i really want this to work okay i feel like i did that pretty good you just trust the process i guess i hope this reveal is satisfying [Music] all right let's see how we look i'm ready [Music] okay oh no i thought it was good oh i look like i've been through some i look like i've been clubbing for like three hours this is what everybody looks at when the lights come on at the club and you're just like eating sweat let's do another one i look good okay next let's do uh okay she's in a car she's fixing a car oh her nail broke how's she gonna fix it are you kidding me tape nails that's what i'm working with these are called anxiety nails bite the out of these i don't think i have colored tape but i'll try to find tape that'll work you already know duct tape i feel like if i made it like this hell yeah oh my god don't call me chris call me esthetician you know these look like the bugles that you get at the store anybody else put those on their fingers all the time is that only a canadian thing i have no idea like these little chips that you put on your hand i feel like if i painted these this could maybe pass i'm just gonna do one hand it's getting more and more difficult kevin i don't have time for this i'm trying to beautify myself you wouldn't understand hell yeah oh my god what shade duct tape i'm a multi-tool i feel fabulous oh my gosh and then if like something happens around the house or you need to like plug something up or something you just tape it to the wall you know or if you're gossiping with the girls and one of the won't shut up you just take some tape off and just shut up becky shut up oh dear god okay uh we're washing hair's washed hair's damp and we have a plastic bag and we're putting it on our head we're making a hole and we're sticking something in the hole and drying our hair oh how does that the plastic not like melt okay well we gotta try it okay i'm actually curious if this is this is absorbed i know my hair is dry but you know i'm just gonna see if it like fluffs it at all what do you do you put this in cut here okay stop yeah how do you reverse tie this way i just kill myself on my own videos oh okay oh i got it okay good perfect i don't see how the plastic wouldn't like melt onto my head you know if it happens good thumbnail oh yeah i look like a big cute tip right kev kev he's not having it oh i need a a blow dryer oh i gotta put a hole in my head gotta make it just big enough that's what she said there's too many michael scott that was she said moments i gotta make it bigger that's what she said it's too tight that's what she said i'm kind of scared i'm doing like a science experiment megamind is this working i feel like it shouldn't be on extra hot is it melting [Applause] i think i just saw jesus let's see if this worked my ears oh perfect don't know how fool-proof that is plastic melted so that's a hazard i'm gonna sue five-minute crust okay next hair wax oh oh my gosh these are even bigger than the first time and a paper napkin oh god that looks terrifying oh my god oh my god so natural she looks so good oh my god arts and crafts okay let me go get some hair gel i don't know uh how well this is gonna work am i allowed to put this on my lips do not ingest got it we're gonna do it anyway and do it for the bed oh god not again i am an artist oh this smells like a middle school dance does that make sense all the guys wearing like axe body spray and look we want to look like jennifer coolidge oh my god what the am i doing oh no don't adjust it don't adjust it don't adjust it i'll just have to make them bigger you know hers were like pretty big it won't stay i think it looks natural so now i'm gonna put wet napkins on it i don't really know is this like a paper is my face a paper mache project yeah i guess i got wet toilet paper because i'm trash just like a casual night out you know first date easy look you won't even know trying to get wet napkin off the sorry mm-hmm oh no i'm trying so hard not to ingest this let's put the lipstick on just tell me in the comments what i look like down below please i'd love to hear it got some red we're looking okay yes whose idea was this five-minute cross i think they just go around to like kindergarten classes and they just ask them they're like hey what do you think like how would you put fake lips on somebody and they're just like hair gel i don't know oh no it looks like i have a venereal disease this looks more like a halloween costume like i'm doing like sfx makeup shittiest effects makeup i think that's as good as we're gonna get so i'll do a jennifer coolidge impression and we'll move on oh my god you're not very pretty and you're not very bright ah i'm so glad we had that talk next okay that was fun to wash off you know if like male puberty had a smell that's what my mouth smells like right now because it it smells like cheap cologne i'm gonna shut up okay next let's see what's next ah okay we have hair toilet paper in the hair on the head wrap it around oh it's like a whole hair headpiece thing holy okay well let's try it i need toilet paper got it triple plat do i need a ponytail my hair is not that long i don't think this is gonna work this is a very inclusive look at this i got a nub that's all i got look i look like a who from whoseville right now i can't do it my hair's not even long enough for this this isn't fair wait i have wigs one's like scarlet is back we have hair you put it up like this twisty twisty perfect and then we put it through get in there son of a okay oh oh this looks like a shitty middle school science project it's like this is the volcano i made okay now my hair is falling my weeds fall off oh oh my god i feel like daphne from scooby doo oh wait it kind of works i mean if i skip oh okay damn it i feel like this would be like a vogue look okay next two lips for what for who for why for me to try let's go well we still have this masking tape i feel like is this gonna be too big though i'll go put it in half nice oh wait we gotta put your lips together oh okay um oh my ew that looks terrifying i got i love this me too let's do the next one okay another lips one everything's about the lips oh i've always wanted to try this with the shot glass and then i think you go i think it's dangerous i don't care let's do it i'll go get a shot glass i don't know if he had to fill or not but hers wasn't but i just figured you know oh god okay all right let's try this and then you just like i think okay let's look before oh god oh it's too wide my mouth was just don't really nothing [Music] it didn't really work it looks the same it didn't work well it was my lungs don't work it didn't ik nope nope it's cap we have face oh double chin okay yeah yeah yeah i don't think i have that kind of tape oh i have a scotch tape and duct tape what are you doing she oh my gosh is this like a manual facelift stop you need surgery when you have scotch tape and it's totally not noticeable at all okay this isn't working we need duct tape it's not sticky enough my skin is going to hate me by the end of this all right here we go okay i guess you just like apply like this and you just pull that to the atmosphere it also waxes your under gin okay maybe behind the ear why does it look like i had a stroke oh my gosh he'll never know yeah only if you go like this look like a goddamn ai robot that's trying to repair itself what no i mean it works kind of is it practical not at all oh no no i got to take it off i said my hair next all right a stalking on the face oh i see so there's going to be a pattern we could look like a mermaid oh my god yes it'll take away from my freckles i have stockings wait maybe i could just use this wait i need other stuff one second all right here we go let's do this oh look at me now mom look at me now wait why is this why is that terrifying okay now let's apply i think i'm just gonna go buck wild i don't even know what to do i don't have that many colors though they're all pretty neutral go go like purple i don't know all along here i want this to work for me yes i hope the delivery man doesn't come right now you imagine like hey you want to come in you want a party deeper screamer where'd you get them breathing rivers creepers all right i got that smile i don't know i just kinda wanna just see the pattern you know i'm being more creative i feel you don't really like expanding my color palettes oh we can do like a little fade up okay i'm excited oh wait i kind of like the lips though this is if oliver twist and a crocodile had a baby oh my god i hope that's not the delivery guy uh let's do a couple more all right last we're starting we're ending off with an outfit we're ending off with an outfit all right we got big t okay you gotta turn it around oh god oh god no no no no no no no it's too fast it's too fast let me go get in a t-shirt i'm in a shirt oh my god my face looks like somebody took a fancy on me you know i love that let's follow the instructions so she turned it sideways nobody move sideways and then wait instructions unclear oh my god cute okay now what see she's putting a scarf in and around oh my god okay cool i have a scarf we just put it in the hole you know what i mean out the top a magic trick okay let me wrap it i did not shave my armpits and then wait what can double as a scarf wait i need a belt i don't have a belt though duct tape cinch that waist perfect oh my god oh my god i can't really see it that well but i feel like it works jay does it work put your answer here great fantastic okay well i think that was a success i have a new outfit wait where's this flap go you tuck it in this way oh i'm a fancy okay well that was fun i will definitely take some of those away and throw them in the trash because they all kind of suck but i hope you had fun watching i had fun trying let me know what you want to see in the comments below what else you want to see and if you like the video please like the video it does really help out the channel and yeah you could subscribe too that'd be cool and i'm going to go wash my face in very hot water and uh i'm gonna wash my mouth out as well so i hope you guys have a great day i love you very much i'll see you in my next video bye [Music] you

Channel: Kallmekris

Views: 2,860,271

Rating: 4.9764819 out of 5

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Id: ylODzVAPH3s

Length: 18min 59sec (1139 seconds)

Published: Sat Oct 02 2021