Airport Sushi - SNL

>>> YEAH, I'LL GET THIS CHOBANI YOGURT WITH NO SPOON TO EAT IT WITH. PLEASE. >> YEAH, AND I'D LIKE A BOTTLE OF WATER THAT WILL ROLL TO THE BACK OF THE PLANE AS SOON AS WE TAKE OFF. >> RIGHT. A $15 DASANI WATER, EXTRA PLASTIC. >> AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I'LL GET THE SUSHI TOO. >> I'M SORRY? >> YOU KNOW, THE SUSHI, YOU KNOW, THE SPICY TUNA ROLL THAT'S SITTING IN THE DISPLAY CASE NEXT TO THE HAM AND CHEESE PANINI. >> YOU'RE SURE YOU WANT THE SUSHI? >> YOU'RE BUYING SUSHI AT LaGUARDIA AIRPORT? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR DAMN MIND? >> I WANT A NICE BALANCE OF CARBS AND PROTEIN, JUST SELL ME THE SUSHI, MAN. >> YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND. >> OH, PHANTOM OF LaGUARDIA. WHY DON'T YOU TELL THIS YOUNG MAN HOW HE'LL FEEL AFTER HE EATS OUR SUSHI. ♪♪♪ ♪ YOUR DREAMS ARE HAUNTING YOU THAT DISH YOU ATE ♪ ♪ THE EXPIRATION DATE IS 10/18 AND STILL YOU'RE CHOOSING IT AS FOOD FOR A PLANE ♪ ♪ THE PHANTOM OF THE BATHROOM STAND IT SMELLS INSANE ♪ ♪ I AM THE SUSHI CHEF I MADE THAT ROLL THE FISH INSIDE OF IT CRAWLED OUT A HOLE ♪ ♪ YES, YOU'RE CONSUMING IT THIS GREAT MISTAKE YOU'D HONESTLY BE SO MUCH BETTER OFF ♪ ♪ EATING A WUHAN SNAKE ♪ >> IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE A PIJth? >> NO, HE'S ONE OF THE GEESE THAT TOOK DOWN SULLY'S PLANE. >> MIRACLE ON THE HUDSON. MORE LIKE MASSACRE IN THE SKY. >> AND THERE'S JUST A BIRD LOOSE IN THE TERMINAL? >> OF COURSE, HAVEN'T YOU BEEN TO LaGUARDIA BEFORE? ♪ I LIKE TO WAIT AT LaGUARDIA ♪ LOTS OF DELAYS AT LaGUARDIA ♪ ♪ WATCHED A MAN DIE AT LaGUARDIA ♪ ♪ BAGGAGE CLAIM CAROUSEL CLING CLING ♪ ♪ OUTLETS ARE THERE IT'S A COLD FRANK HERE'S TO A SKANKY OLD FEELING ♪ ♪ WE LIKE TO PLAY AT LaGUARDIA ♪ ♪ WHO CAN YOU BLAME AT LaGUARDIA ♪ >> I'LL TELL YOU WHO YOU CAN BLAME. >> LITTLE ORPHAN ANNIE. ♪ WHEN ANYTHING SAYS De BLASIO THROW YOUR HANDS UP AND SAY De BLASIO ♪ ♪ YOU'LL FEEL SHAME I KNOW SOME OF IT WAS MIKE BLOOMBERG ♪ ♪ BUT IT STILL FEELS LIKE De BLASIO IS TO BLAME ♪ ♪ WHY ARE THERE FIVE PLANES ON THE TARMAC BUT THE TAXIS MUST STAY THREE MILES AWAY ♪ ♪ De BLASIO De BLASIO HE'LL KEEP THEM A TOWN AWAY ♪ >> AND LOOK, HERE COMES A CRYING BABY ABOUT TO BOARD A TRANS CONTINENTAL FLIGHT. ♪♪♪ ♪ GOT A STRIPER IN A DIAPER IT'S STINKY STOOL BOY ♪ >> JUST PLAY IT COOL BABY. REAL COOL. IF MY PARENTS ARE LOOKING FOR ME, WHICH THEY'RE NOT. I'LL BE IN THE KIDS PLAY ROOM THAT'S ALSO A PET RELIEF AREA. >> WOW! THAT LET A BABY THROUGH SECURITY. >> DID SOMEONE SAY SECURITY? >> HELLO, GUY WHO TRAVELS IN PAJAMAS. >> THAT'S RIGHT. I DRESS SO THAT TSA CAN HAVE EASY ACCESS TO MY BODY. ♪ SO IF YOU CARE TO SEARCH ME I'LL SPREAD MY LEGS REAL WIDE ♪ ♪ I'LL EVEN BEND OVER FOR YOU CAN TAKE A PEEK INSIDE ♪ ♪ YOU CAN TELL THAT I ENJOY SECURITY ♪ YOU CAN SEARCH WAY UP IN MY CAVITY ♪ ♪ YOU CAN PAT ME DOWN YOU DON'T HAVE TO USE THE FRONT OF YOUR HANDS ♪ >> OKAY, WE GET IT, JESUS. YOU CAN CONTINUE ON TO CLEVELAND. >> HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS GOING TO CLEVELAND? >> THAT'S WHERE EVERYONE AT LaGUARDIA IS GOING, LIKE IT OR NOT. ♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> ATTENTION, WE HAVE A GATE CHANGE FOR PASSENGERS GOING TO CLEVELAND. YOUR OLD GATE WAS A-7. YOUR NEW GATE IS G-46. IT IS PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO MAKE IT TO THAT GATE IN TIME. AND THE PLANE WILL LEAVE EMPTY. THANK YOU. >> I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE LEFT THAT AT JFK. >> AND I SHOULD HAVE STAYED HOME. >> OH, RELAX. I'M NOT SICK. ♪ I'M JUST A PROBIO AGENT STANDING BESIDE YOU ♪ ♪ MY COUGH IS OVER YOU'LL GET OFF THE PLANE PROBIO AGENT ♪ ♪ NO I WASN'T IN PARASITE I KNOW THE VIRUS IS BAD BUT IT'S COMING FROM ITALY TOO ♪ >> MAN, THIS AIRPORT IS LIKE ITS OWN WORLD. >> YES, A THIRD WORLD. >> IF YOU STAY HERE LONG ENOUGH YOU WILL LEARN THE MYSTERIES OF LaGUARDIA. >> WHY, IT'S THE BAGGAGE HANDLER WHO TOSSES EVERYONE'S SUITCASES INTO LONG ISLAND SOUND. >> THAT'S RIGHT. AND YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT -- ♪ WE'RE ON A PLANE TO NOWHERE ♪ ♪ COME ON IN INSIDE ♪ ♪ THEY SAY IT'S ABOUT TO TAKE OFF THAT IS A LIE ♪ ♪ SURE IT WILL START TO TAXI ♪ ♪ BUT THEN IT COMES BACK ♪ ♪ WE'RE ON A ROAD TO ALMOST HELL OVERNIGHT ♪

Channel: Saturday Night Live

Views: 8,225,306

Rating: 4.8197441 out of 5

Keywords: snl, saturday night live, snl season 45, snl 45, john mulaney, david byrne, beck bennett, mikey day, pete davidson, kate mckinnon, chris redd, cecily strong, kenan thompson, melissa villaseñor, chloe fineman, musical, airport sushi, s45, s45e14, episode 14, live, new york, comedy, sketch, funny, hilarious, late night, host, music, guest, laugh, impersonation, actor, New In Town, The Comeback Kid, SpiderMan, Into the Spider-Verse, Spider-Ham, Kid Gorgeous, The Top Part

Id: 6d7Vk_qaiB8

Length: 8min 12sec (492 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 29 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/davejim]

I love when John Mulaney hosts. I actually really love these parodies.

[u/Dundermuffin666]

David Byrne is a treasure

[u/selkies88]

OMG that DeBalsio/Annie solo was cherry on the top. One of the best SNL skits in quite some time.

[u/LeftyMode]

John Mulaney definitely wrote that since it was actually coherent and entertaining.

[u/Rajb1031]

Absolutely brilliant. Right up there with bodega bathroom.

[u/ocelotrev]

I'm surprised they didnt say at the end of the De Blasio skit that it's actually Cuomo's fault. You know Cuomo has an iron grip on the state when even SNL wont touch him.

[u/turned_into_a_newt]

What was the song Bowen Yang was parodying?

[u/shotsup]

Who was Jesus on the harness

[u/milki-rose]

the deblasio part sent me 😂