Earthquake News Report - SNL

>> ACTION 9, NEWS AT 5:00. NOR CAL'S NUMBER ONE CHOICE FOR NEWS. >> GOOD AFTERNOON. OUR TOP STORY, A 5.3 MAGNITUDE EARTHQUAKE RATTLED DOWNTOWN SACRAMENTO THIS MORNING, CAUSING WIDESPREAD STRUCTURAL DAMAGE. OUR OWN RANDALL FIELDS IS IN CAPITOL PLAZA. RANDALL, BESIDES THE GROUND, WHAT'S SHAKING OVER THERE? >> WELL LOTS, CAROL. AND GIVEN THE SEVERITY OF THE SITUATION, I FOUND THAT EARTHQUAKE PUN IN VERY POOR TASTE. I'M HERE AT THE SOCIAL SECURITY ADMINISTRATION BUILDING WHERE A PORTION OF THE SECOND FLOOR CAVED IN, TRAPPING SEVERAL PEOPLE WHO ARE IN THE LEGAL CHANGE OF NAME OFFICE BELOW. I'M TOLD THE BUILDING WAS ESPECIALLY BUSY AS DUE TO THE PARTIAL GOVERNMENT SHUT DOWN OFFICE HOURS HAVE BEEN LIMITED. JOINING ME ARE TWO GENTLEMEN WHO WERE INSIDE THE BUILDING, WAITING TO CHANGE THEIR NAMES WHEN THE EARTHQUAKE STRUCK US. PLEASE, TELL US WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU REMEMBER. >> YEAH, MY NAME IS DONALD McRONALD. AND I'M TRYING TO CHANGE MY LAST NAME TO JOHNSON, FINALLY STOP ALL THE DUMBASS CHILDISH JOKES, WHEN EVERYTHING JUST STARTED SHAKING. >> YEAH, I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I GOT OUT. BUT I'M FEELING -- VERY LUCKY RIGHT NOW. I'M SORRY. I'M FEELING VERY LUCKY RIGHT NOW. >> AND YOUR NAME SIR? >> MARK PENIS. I'LL BE CHANGING IT TO >> RANDALL, I'M SORRY. I'M GOING TO HAVE TO CUT MR. PENIS OFF HERE. WE HAVE AN UPDATE FROM SEARCH AND RESCUE OFFICIALS AT THE SCENE. I'M DR. SHANA STEEL, TRIAGE COORDINATOR FOR FAMILY MEMBERS WORRIED ABOUT RELATIVES WHO WERE IN THE CHANGE OF NAME OFFICE. HERE IS A LIST OF RESCUED INDIVIDUALS TAKEN TO ST. JOSEPH'S MEMORIAL HOSPITAL. LISA SIMPSON, BILL COSBY, MARIO PARTY, TIE KNEE DICK, MORGAN MINDY. >> NANU NANU. SORRY. >> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE ARE AT SACRAMENTO GENERAL. SIBLINGS GARY, LARRY, AND MARY POTTER. TACO BELL, IVAN JERKINOV. PETE OPHELIA AND KEITH, HOW WOULD YOU SAY THAT? >> KEITH QUEEF. >> I SHOULD MENTION, THAT WE DID NOT KNOW MR. QUEEF WAS INSIDE SO WHEN HE CAME OUT IT WAS A DELIGHTFUL SURPRISE. UNFORTUNATELY, WE ARE STILL SEARCHING FOR A REED TODD. >> YEAH, HEY, WE DON'T SAY THAT WORD ANYMORE. >> / >> OKAY, LET'S CHECK BACK IN WITH RANDALL FIELDS. RANDALL, WITH THIS EARTHQUAKE, ANY IDEAS WHO'S AT FAULT? >> NOBODY IS AT FAULT CAROL, AND AGAIN, I FIND YOUR EARTHQUAKE JOKES VERY INAPPROPRIATE. I AM STANDING HERE WITH A CIVILIAN WHO HELPED GET LOTS OF FOLKS OUT SAFELY. SOME ARE EVEN CALLING HIM A HERO. MR. ALAN HITLER. >> OH, PLEASE DON'T SAY HERO, AND PLEASE DON'T SAY MY LAST NAME. JUST USE AN INITIAL. >> WELL, BASED ON YOUR ACTIONS TODAY, THE ONLY THING YOU SHARE WITH THAT OTHER HITLER IS THE LAST NAME. >> AND UNFORTUNATELY, SOME DNA. HE'S MY GREAT UNCLE. BUT EVERYONE'S GOT THAT EMBARRASSING RELATIVE, RIGHT? >> KIND OF, YEAH, AND THANKS FOR TALKING TO US. >> RANDALL, I'M SORRY, I DO -- I HATE TO INTERRUPT MR. HITLER WHO WE ALL ADMIRE SO MUCH, BUT DR. STEEL HAS SOME NEW INFORMATION. >> MOMENTS AGO A SEARCH TEAM RESCUED THIS YOUNG BOY WHO CAME TO CHANGE HIS NAME AND DIDN'T TELL HIS PARENTS BECAUSE HE FELT THEY WOULD BE MAD. MOM, DAD, REST EASY. HOLDEN TWODICKS IS SAFE. HE IS A GREAT KID. HE HAS GOT US ALL SMILING DOWN HERE. >> WHAT A RELIEF FOR THOSE PARENTS AS I AM SURE THEY LOVE HOLDEN TWODICKS MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD. I'M HERE WITH TWO MORE FOLKS ABLE TO GET OUT THANKS TO MR. HITLER. THIS IS JULIA AND I MAY GET SENSORED HERE AS HER LAST NAME SOUNDS CLOSE TO THE N WORD. JULIA [ BLEEP ]. I'M HEARING THAT IT WAS SENSORED. >> >> IT'S TOO CLOSE TO -- YOU KNOW IT WAS GOING TO BE CLOSE. >> WHILE IT IS SPELLED THE SAME WAY, IT'S PRONOUNCED LIKE CIGAR. >> BUT HE SOUNDED LIKE HE SAID THE N WORD WITH A BRITISH ACCENT. >> SOUND ADVICE FROM MRS. -- >> MORE WITH JULIA N AND DR. DONNA DIDDADOG AFTER THE BREAK. >> COMING UP, MORE ON THE SITUATION DOWNTOWN WHERE THE MAYOR IS SCHEDULED TO SPEAK.

Channel: Saturday Night Live

Views: 11,631,333

Rating: 4.9367871 out of 5

Keywords: nbc, snl, saturday night live, snl host, snl 44, snl season 44, season 44, rachel brosnahan, news reporot, kate mckinnon, cecily strong, earthquake, beck bennett, kenan thompson, aidy bryant, kyle mooney, pete davidson, mikey day, heidi gardner, leslie jones, action 9 news, name change, s44, s44e10, episode 10, live, new york, comedy, sketch, funny, hilarious, late night, host, music, guest, laugh, impersonation, actor, musician, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Id: nv6FMEvNiWo

Length: 5min 11sec (311 seconds)

Published: Sat Jan 19 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/john_muleaney]

I’m glad this was made recurring. It’s a dumb sketch but it will never fail to make me laugh like an immature child

[u/TGSHatesWomen]

Rachel Brosnahan was such a great host.

[u/geotraveling]

Who was the actress playing the doctor reading off the names?