A VERY PRO POSTAL CHRISTMAS

[Music] on the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me where the grave I guess I better get started how could I resist doing this postal Christmas you bet your ass we're going there and I wanted to make things special you need green for Christmas right this can't be good for me but I feel great and it gives you 150 health instead of 125 like crack does so maybe it is good for you dude this is all too familiar except you get to see inside of the dude's trailer his [ __ ] wife is gone but champs still hanging around his car looks like it's still broken the dude's neighbors still have useful weapons stashed away in their homes don't let the fact this is some third-party mod folia a very postal Christmas has an absolutely huge map like two dozen different levels this version is the most up to date package on the Steam Workshop I'm sure we won't have any weird issues pop up the rednecks set up another brewery good for them maybe I won't champ what are you doing what are you doing champ damnit I guess champ is pissed because we're not spending Christmas saving them from the pound or some [ __ ] everything goes wrong pretty quickly classic postal I'm not a quarter-mile from home and the rednecks won a piece if you're looking for something a little more wholesome you can pick up letters to Santa from people's mailboxes dear Santa I won't like a call toys face jet 4x mast this year I have been good al this year you friend Billy I guess the dude responds dear Billy nice spelling you're on your way to a career in trash disposal hey how about if you're gonna criticize a child spelling errors use the correct form of your how about I send you a [ __ ] dictionary so you can learn to read and write write I'm giving your older brother of the Space Ranger jet he can spell Santa PS tell your mom to call me Big Daddy Dottie this bod sure treats the player like it's Christmas walk into a garage there's four crack pipes sitting there this can't be good for me but I feel great Oh God did they follow me here too I don't know where this takes place it's not Arizona let's go Stephen King and say Maine this is Maine if you cut all the trees nature will be avenged of you man the closer you get to Canada the weirder the English gets sorry I don't have nearly enough drug money that could be an issue going forward there's a priest in the bathroom selling crack hey hi there and come again wait 50 bucks only 50 bucks that's a steal I've only got enough money on me for one yeah yeah yeah yeah you're eager damn here I was minding my own business hello hi there thanks I don't know if you say so is that oh I get it Catholics are running a scam get the sinner to spend his money on crack and then show them to the light nice try [ __ ] thanks for the scythe the hell is happening in this house get off of me give me some room you go girl I do have objectives and a map both of which were added in the newer releases which makes things way way easier explorations really help to you like in normal postal there's people selling random [ __ ] all over the place take this woman I don't know why she's here but she sells you a police uniform for 30 bucks sounds reasonable right it's like 500 at the laundromat in postal - one of these days I'm gonna find a Christmas mod where Santa isn't evil but it sure as [ __ ] isn't the one for postal Santa must die you know what vanilla postal 2 is missing working playground equipment we this dude looks shady let's go talk to him hola hi there is this everything yes that'll be 40 bucks wait you're selling crack for $40 I knew that [ __ ] priest was ripping me off I guess I should do something besides random acts of cruelty even if it is Christmas here my errands for the day they're all repurposed postal to errands but they're for Christmas you know get eggnog get a Christmas tree get Uncle Dave a present and wait uncle Dave's in jail actually no that's not surprising at all the Good Book told me to make you die then myself maybe this convenience store has some eggnog oh [ __ ] really should have put that police uniform on guess I'll just have to get arrested that'll get me real close to Uncle Dave I'm going to have to cut you you have the right to remain second yeah yeah blah blah you just got me already big man hey Santa wait here I'll be back okay I don't even get all my crack back that's disappointing and the police force in this town is I don't see Uncle Dave anywhere but I do see crotchy I guess I can't take crotchy down stealing a police uniform is a little more difficult than usual since we got police and SWAT roaming around still put it on raid the police armory normal everyday postal stuff hey Santa do you think you could just help the terrorists that get away with it this is taking way more bullets than I expected [Music] you got to do something do it right this town's cops are not as forgiving as paradise cops they've landed a helicopter on the roof across the street they just keep respawning and they don't care if I'm wearing a police uniform [ __ ] this [ __ ] Uncle Dave you can get yourself out of jail there's a bank here just asking to be robbed have a cloudy day [Music] yeah these cops are not responding to my police uniform at all no warning about losing my pension Oh a smoke shop total inventory liquidation this town is awesome look out yo hi there wait the crack here is 30 bucks are you [ __ ] kidding me I've spent more time by cracking this mod than smoking it there's a bail bonds place right next door that's cool I mean how much money could I possibly need to get Uncle Dave out of jail if crack is this cheap oh okay a tank got possessed next to the police station blew a hole in the wall and let Uncle Dave out too easy yeah no [ __ ] I did literally nothing this adds another objective giving Uncle Dave as president the compound sure okay I walked through a level transition I end up on wait hold the [ __ ] on what is all of this there's like 20 cracked pipes here a million crotchy bombs all this ammo just lie in here what the [ __ ] could I possibly need this for see there's an airport in town and it's been taken over by the Taliban I was so concerned that there wouldn't be any terrorists in this oh no we're near the spotter this was the wrong way to come in I have three dozen crack pipes I'm practically invincible it's time to win the war on terror again and you know I could just run around shotgunning or chopping up terrorists and whatnot but it's just not enough overkill [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] cool we took care of al-qaeda we picked up a WMD this is as far as I can recall the best Christmas ever I'm not even bothering with the missions cuz I have no [ __ ] idea where to go this map is bonkers and you can only barely see where you are on it so I wander off into the cemetery wow I guess Gary's actually dead that's a new one creepy churches ahhmm be inside and a what the [ __ ] is going on in here is that a goddamned electric chair oh yeah and what the [ __ ] are these giant lizards and why did they act like Gary's except with way more health Jesus Christ [Music] burning them seems to work half the time this can't be good for me but I feel great [Laughter] okay dismemberment works too cool looks like some secret areas on these unmarked walls here and fine tea posing skeleton extra spooks oh [ __ ] starting to think there might be too many drugs in this there's a prison under the church in the catacombs and I think this Santa's the real Santa who's gonna deliver these gifts now now you'll never get that crane okay so if I have this right these creatures are gremlins and they've taken over the church and they've kidnapped Santa who's working with Osama bin Laden oh man I don't know I'll be back for you Santa let me just clear out these tunnels you're not going anywhere we'll just gremlin cave Vince needs to see you dude hey bangs you should go see Vince Thanks okay but what is the Snowman here Vince deci what did they do to you what are these caves and why are they full a Taliban and precious stones and why are there priests miners trying to kill me when I steal them what is happening why is the water dead though is this where the Kremlin's lay their eggs so we're not talking about Christmas gremlins we're talking about a whole different species cuz they can't just jump in the water because then they'd be set on fire because of course that's how that works up smashing the eggs anyway because they clearly have Gary Coleman DNA in them and holy [ __ ] is that Gary's ghost no because Gary's right behind him oh my god holy I can't it's some kind of cult some kind of cult of Gary they've made some pact with some dark God there is evil evil in this town and Christmas can't be saved until it is cleansed oh yeah that's how you want to play it they have a crotchety I need to get the [ __ ] out of these caves I'm smoking too much crack I got real missions to do you know this is completely irrelevant to any mission in this mod it's just here under the town there's [ __ ] rifts opening and excuse me what what the [ __ ] this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I feel great this can't be good for me but I think great this can't be good for me sideways sideways sideways this can't be good for me but I feel great I remember I was in the caves you [ __ ] give me a second I lost a lot of time that's clearly wrong okay I'm not on the map at all but I'm actually in front of Sunny Hills rest home but the map doesn't say that I need to find my way back to the church to deal with Santa I already know you got to burn him maybe the street signs will help Hills Way and Hills way that can't be right this isn't the church I mean it's a church it's not the church I want if you say so one side key I don't need a key okay so this transition takes me back to the convenience store I robbed earlier that didn't have any eggnog I guess I completed all my missions already except the eggnog I remember getting Uncle Dave out of jail but okay if I go to cider town and the woods wait these two areas how okay but cider town and north from there is the Lost Woods and I follow the map north what but then I get out of this map but it takes me to the bar but then I head towards a liquor store which puts me here [Applause] so I'm in the woods right I'm pretty sure I'm going west towards the church so I go through the level transition and and I don't know why I didn't see it before Santa controls this town he's put it under some evil spell and it's not gonna let me suck it you see what's going on here in these tunnels in these in these crypts you tell 42 different places it's not linear it's it's you go in one tunnel and you end up coming out another when I finally make it to Santa [Music] he's gone say it it's gone huh well I guess there's one thing left to do I regret nothing it's the only way out of his game now that's weird how did I get here last thing I remember was killing Santa this can't be good for me but I feel great that UFO I didn't hallucinate that UFO that's here not getting away this time I tracked it to its landing zone this is gonna be good this is some [ __ ] right well I've tried everything else Sleep in heavenly peace et [Music] all I have left to do is to get that eggnog and the liquor store was closed before now it's open I can't seem to pay the cashier for anything holy [ __ ] a very postal Christmas after you complete the errands it should end with this weird jackass workshop version that gives me a hundred and one thousand crack pipes surprisingly doesn't work as intended if you think that's gonna stop me from showing you the ending yeah right I'm not getting stuck in an endless loop of a very postal Christmas unfortunately the cheat code to change the map to a V PC outro which is the ending it doesn't work so I had to get creative and I renamed it so that the game would load it right up let's see yeah dudes passed out on the couch alone he's got cracking guns a bag of weed aside from the lack of a family or joy or goodwill towards men this is totally festive wait wait no what's it's playing again I'm it it won't stop I can't get the bed you guys that stop escape isn't working it's not shutting down oh boy it's not nice to shoot sir no can tell I said before it's not most acute Center sent up must die [Music] Liz come [Music] all is right [Music]

Channel: Civvie 11

Views: 505,084

Rating: 4.9406552 out of 5

Keywords: civvie, cv11, civvie's dungeon, pro postal, postal 2, running with scissors, a very postal christmas, mod, playthrough, walkthrough, let's play, entertainment, comedy, nightmare, gremlins, posta, postal, christmas, holidays

Id: ahML4f-Bvlo

Length: 21min 52sec (1312 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 23 2018