[Goosebumps theme playing]
You may have seen this image before. It’s the cover for the “Mystery of the Druids”. It’s a 2001 adventure game, and this face… Well, that’s just the beginning… [chirp, buzz] [organ music] [crack of thunder] This was a long time coming. A while back, I talked about “Limbo of the Lost”, and, honestly, my brain still doesn’t let me accept that that was real. However, that’s a game that’s insane right from the get go. You know you’re in for a ride from the very beginning. Many adventure games are like that, but this one is deceptive. Because, sure, you have screaming druid cover, which has been a joke for, like, what, 20 years now? It is funny, but it’s also overshadowed the game itself. On Steam, it’s mostly negative, but that could be because no one there can actually run the damn thing. And neither can I, because, like the reviews said, I crash constantly, and it freezes up. Luckily, GOG released a fixed version a few years back. The wording was a little strange, but they seem to be big fans of the game. Really big fans. I mean, look who is QAing it… And the second they found out I was doing this, they put it on absurd discount, and the page is all weird, and… Okay, look, before all this, something seemed odd about it. So, like “Limbo of the Lost”, I’m here to take you on a journey. After all, a cosmic horror hiding under something innocuous is perfect for Halloween. It has Dolby Surround plastered all over it, too, so look forward to some great audio. In fact, some of you may have been looking forward to this a little too much… So now I’ll skip past the credits and begin the descent. [quiet whispers and droning music] [whispers and chanting are slowly growing in volume] [eerie music rolling in] [sounds fade] Okay, you got all that? We’re then taken to the Scotland Yard, where we meet our hero and his boss. It’s not clear yet what the Druids have to do with anything, but I guess that’s the mystery… MILLER: “Now, look here, Detective Halligan, I’ve got used to being surrounded by a bunch of incompetent half-baked blockheads,” MILLER: “but your smart, well-dressed colleague Lowry has just earned himself the golden badge of stupidity.” [puff-puff-puff] [silent facepalm] MILLER: “Halligan, we got a bit of a problem.” To save some exposition time: your co-worker Lowry has thrown an innocent man in jail for murder. Said man was then murdered in jail, and the real killer is still on the loose. So now Detective Halligan is taking over, and the Chief seems furious about it. Why does he hate Halligan so much? MILLER: “…that there’s no point in asking you to clear up anything more than a common bicycle theft.” MILLER: “But this does happen to be the murder squad. I am the Chief of this department. All I have for choice is that blockhead Lowry and you.” HALLIGAN: “Okay, Chief, what do you want me to do?” 😐 And so it begins… The first thing Chief Miller does is chastise you for not knowing Lowry’s case file. This is actually a readable document. It’s a PDF for the GOG version, but the physical game came with one. It’s all pretty irrelevant – it just tells you that Lowry is an asshole and he got the wrong guy. We knew that already. Halligan, however, is struggling. HALLIGAN: “Well, alright, these things happen. But how do you know that the man Lowry arrested didn’t commit the murders?” MILLER: “Very simple: dead people don’t go around committing more murders.” MILLER: “No sloppiness now – I want results! Sensible results. The press has already been terrorizing me this morning.” MILLER: “The killer must be found. Do I make myself clear?” 😑 HALLIGAN: “Of course, Chief.” From here you properly control Halligan, and it looks like your standard adventure game fare. You can click on random items to hear more information, but also click on Miller again to hear more about the case, because Halligan seems clueless. MILLER: “Halligan, it’s well-known that you’d rather read those crazy books of yours during office hours” MILLER: “than taking any real interest in the affairs of this department,” MILLER: “but it would now appear you’ve even stopped reading the newspapers as well.” MILLER: “For months now, a killer’s been running around in London, taking victims apart and leaving nothing but bones for us to find.” MILLER: “You can read about it in any newspaper.” We now have confirmation that a Super Zodiac Killer was running around, and we’re now playing a cop that had no idea about it. But he has excuses for that! HALLIGAN: “I don’t pay too much attention to what the papers say.” From here, you can move around and explore the station. Halligan’s office seems like a good place to start, and it looks like a bomb went off. And the décor is… what? HALLIGAN: “God save the Queen. Even if she’s wearing a really ugly green suit.” Okay… We also learn Halligan’s a recovering smoker. That doesn’t seem crazy for his job, until you find out he’s been smoking a carton a week. That’s 28 cigarettes every day, on average. Things only get stranger. HALLIGAN: “Good to know that there are intelligent life forms out there. In here, I only meet weirdos like Detective Lowry.” Well, that’s what the Chief meant by “insane books”, since, apparently, Halligan’s been studying crop circles. Along with other conspiracies. HALLIGAN: “John Sinclair, “Ghost Hunter”. My favorite book.” HALLIGAN: “Unfortunately, there’s no pitza in there anymore.” “Pitza”? HALLIGAN: “Al’s Pitza Palace makes the best pitzer in the whole of London.” Okay, English viewers, have you ever heard anyone there natively say “pitza”? I’m going to guess “no”, because this is a German game. The thing is, it’s really the only word that gets mangled like this. A voice director out there had to be insisting on “pitza”. The other word they get weird sometimes is, ironically, “Druid”. Sometimes they’re “Drood”. This is the “Mystery of the Droods”. Anyhow, Halligan grabs essentials, like apple juice, a scarf he stole from a co-worker he likes, and with each moment, it becomes more terrifyingly clear why Miller did not want Halligan on the case. HALLIGAN: “The cleaner will empty the ashtray.” The Chief have been going on just how much Lowry screwed up the case, so let’s pay him a visit. Now we can- [mysterious, humming ambience] Why is there droning ambient music? Why is he floating like Vivec? I know the obvious answer is “it’s some kind of bug”, but it’s not that simple. If I go on the store page for the game, it’s a featured screenshot. These are created by, or at least approved by developers. In other words, this is word of God – this is how it’s meant to be played. Images of him in the chair are either fake, or some kind of copy protection. The game has barely begun, and I am already so full of questions. What is Lowry’s purpose here? HALLIGAN: “Hello, Lowry.” LOWRY: “Oh, no, not you, Halligan… You’re all I need at the moment!” 🙄 HALLIGAN: “That’s a nice suit you’re wearing.” LOWRY: “Don’t humor me, Halligan. You don’t know a thing about suits.”😑 LOWRY: “A blind man would know from a hundred yards away that you bought your stuff at Woolworth’s.” LOWRY: “What do you want?” He’s here to bully Halligan. HALLIGAN: “Just a quick question, Lowry: have you seen my wallet?” LOWRY: “Your wallet? You’ve got a nerve…” LOWRY: “I haven’t really had a very pleasant day so far, as you might have noticed. Why would I worry about your bloody wallet?!” HALLIGAN: “Lowry, could you just give me a sensible answer? I’m looking for my wallet.” LOWRY: “So what? Do you think I’ve got it?” LOWRY: “Why don’t you just go and clear up your oh so tidy office? Maybe you’ll find some of those things you allegedly just wanted to borrow for a while.” HALLIGAN: “Let’s not argue, Lowry. I need some information from you about the last investigation.” LOWRY: “You’ve got the file, Halligan. I suppose you can read. And now scram!” HALLIGAN: “Lowry, I’ve read your file – there’s just nonsense in it.” LOWRY: “Do you know what I think, Halligan?” LOWRY: “I think I don’t need to tolerate a detective in a £20 suit, walking past my door, criticizing the quality of my work.” HALLIGAN: “If my suit was more expensive, would that make your file any better?” LOWRY: “Very witty, Detective, yes, really, very witty… Tell me, haven’t you got anything better to do than crack jokes?” HALLIGAN: “Thank you for being so very FRIENDLY, Lowry. Enjoy your spare time.” LOWRY: “Just clear off, Halligan.” 😑 I’ve gotta say, besides the whole “pitza” thing, the voice acting and direction is really excellent. You’ve barely talked, and you can already feel the history of their rivalry. You can mess around in his office for a bit and learn more about how Halligan views the world. HALLIGAN: “Books? He’s got BOOKS?!” 😲 HALLIGAN: “They’re probably just for show – meant to impress the ladies.” Speaking of ladies, there is one in the office you can talk to (the one who Halligan has her scarf for some reason). You can’t actually return it to her yet, but I think her neck has bigger problems. [*crack*] It turns out Halligan is mainly on his own, and he’s locked out from the police information database. This is strange, but you can investigate it further. I’ve been abridging it, but there are several conversation options you could try out when you’re talking to people, and even go back and replay the game to try new ones. In the case of Janet here, you have the option of screaming at her. HALLIGAN: “Damn bureaucracy! I NEED TO MAKE AN ENQUIRY, JANET! RIGHT NOW!” JANET: “If you start shouting at me, I shall see the Chief before you can count to three. Do you understand?” 😑 Naturally, from here Halligan can start hitting on her. He does as well as you’d expect by now, but we also get a glimpse of just how un-self-aware Halligan is. JANET: “Listen, Brent, I don’t feel like going to a stinky, cheap pub, drinking watery beer and talking about darts, pizzas and aliens.” 🙄 That sounds completely fair, even off the little we know. His office IS full of pizza and aliens, but does he roll with it? HALLIGAN: “Janet, what’s up? Has Lowry been talking nonsense about me again?” 🥺 JANET: “No, Halligan, and he doesn’t need to either – you talk enough of it yourself.” JANET: “And now, please be good enough to let me carry on with my job, okay?” HALLIGAN: “I understand.” HALLIGAN: “Lowry HAS been talking about me. And you believe every word he’s said.” JANET: “I believe only what I see, Detective Halligan. And right now, I can see a man right in front of my desk, who is WASTING. MY. TIME.” The Chief also confirms Halligan has been locked out of the database for his own good. He darkly alludes to “some business with the Royal Family”, but doesn’t go into detail on it. Only that it caused weeks of national chaos, so maybe we’ll find out more later. You can stick around a lot longer, but I’ve had my fill of office politics for the moment. So it’s off to the latest crime scene in Epping Forest. We get new creepy ambient music. [creepy ambient music] The crime appears to be another one of the infamous Skeleton Murders. Just like the Chief said, there’s nothing but bones. Halligan probes the on-site officers, but they don’t know anything. No forensic evidence besides the bones, and no witnesses. So, from here, all you can really do is poke around through the bones. On a meta level, it’s also the first clue of what the puzzle gameplay will be like. HALLIGAN: “That is no important evidence, I’m sure about that.” You need to bag THE CORRECT bone. Can you tell yet? Well, it’s the big femur off to the right. It’s not too bad – could be worse, like the burnt grass you can also pick up. If there was any doubt, now the player knows for sure that pixel-hunting is on the menu. That’s all that can really be done here, so back to the Yard. [frenetic galloping] Time to bring the evidence down to forensics. HALLIGAN: “What do you think about this?” CHRIS: “This is grass, Halligan.” You don’t learn much beyond the “grass is slightly burnt”. I’m saving you a lot of, ehm… speculation. HALLIGAN: “Can bones get that hot in the sun?” 🤔 The femur is significant, but forensics can’t find anything on it that’s helpful. You’re then directed to visit a Doctor Turner at the Oxford Anthropology Museum. I’ve gotta say, we do have the groundwork for a great game here. People being vaporized into skeletons is silly, but it is a compelling mystery. We’ve also got solid, well-voice-acted characters to work with. So far my biggest drawback is just how ugly everything is. The characters don’t look awful in the 2D backgrounds, or something like that, but everything’s been very drab so far. Thinking back 4 years, Ray in the “Blade Runner” game is wearing a near-identical wardrobe to Halligan, but his animation has infinitely more life to it, and the backgrounds are so rich. Halligan runs like there’s something wrong with him, and there’s not much to the background yet. Oh well… Maybe someone else can fill us in on the database issue. HALLIGAN: “I know that you’ll say “no”, but I have to ask for your help.” LOWRY: “You do actually need help, Halligan, but not from me. Try social worker. Well?” HALLIGAN: “I didn’t see any inquiry results from the information department in your file. Is that right?” LOWRY: “Of course! Thanks to these bloody new security regulations, which were introduced thanks to you, Halligan.” LOWRY: “If you hadn’t gone and put an arrest warrant for Prince Charles in the computer after Princes Di’s accident, we wouldn’t be in this mess!” 😤 HALLIGAN: “That was just an innocent joke.” LOWRY: “Innocent, yeah…” 🙄 Jesus! Halligan sure has a thing with the Royal Family, huh? Well, it’s off to the museum to meet Dr. Turner, a-and it’s closed. So, that sucks, but looking around might yield some answers. There is a payphone on the right side of the museum, but Halligan’s wallet is still missing, and he has no money. It’s no big deal, since there are plenty of phones back at the office anyhow. Seems odd to have it though… Taking a look at the other side, there’s a hobo begging for money. He barely has anything, but he’s still richer than Halligan at the moment. It’s apparent the beggar’s been living a hard life. BEGGAR: “I’ve lost everything. Everything. No money, no flat, no future.” BEGGAR: “I’m finished, simply finished.” 😔 HALLIGAN: “Have you tried working?” 😐 BEGGAR: “Listen, mate, do you want trouble?” 😑 Long story short, he hasn’t seen Dr. Turner. You can try to barter for his change or outright steal it, but that’s not happening. Instead, you can steal his extra flask. So, it’s back to the office to use the phone. HALLIGAN: “I never use the receiver, that thing is just too heavy. Using the loudspeaker is much more comfortable.” Jesus Christ… Okay, I’ll do that. If I can actually find it. Oh, there we- [tone] Oh, Christ, it’s a puzzle! Well, your phone is a no-go. Halligan was making tons of long-distance international calls for no apparent reason, so the department cut him off from making outgoing calls. Now the adventure really begins! No one in the office lets Halligan use their phone. Since he calls the Caribbean for no goddamn reason, I think this is justified. But it does make me won- [*woosh*] Uh… [*woosh*] But it does make me wonder what he WAS doing. No one gives Halligan change either. He has gambling debts to every single person in the office, except for Lowry. HALLIGAN: “Could you lend me some change?” LOWRY: “You haven’t found your wallet, have you? Well, sorry, Halligan, but this is Scotland Yard, not the Bank of England.” 😎 HALLIGAN: “The Bank of England is the central CLEARING bank, Lowry, you can’t draw any money there.” LOWRY: “Indeed? Just try it somewhere else then! You won’t get a penny from me!” I don’t even know why I bothered trying. I dig around the Scotland Yard for change, but I don’t find any. Instead, I find bottles in the lab I can dust off and some fingerprint powder. It’s not a pixel hunt, but it doesn’t stick out either. Halligan notices they have bottles of medical ethanol, and immediately gets jealous. HALLIGAN: “You’ve got a great job, Chris.” 😒 CHRIS: “Nonsense, Halligan. Do you think we spend all day getting drunk with medical alcohol?” CHRIS: “Why don’t you just try the stuff?” Bet taken! How will it go? HALLIGAN: “Alright, here we go… Cheers.” HALLIGAN: “M’g-ahh…” CHRIS: “To your health, Brent! An interesting aroma, isn’t it? Brent? Aren’t you feeling very well?” CHRIS: “Brent? Are you sure you’re okay? Ah-hah, ah-hah-hah…” [*BOM*] [disoriented huffing] HALLIGAN: 🤢 HALLIGAN: “Goddamit!” Now you can dust for fingerprints to show you the bottle that… he said he was gonna take… is the one that has prints on it. I guess he’s just being cautious… Then Halligan mixes it with apple juice. Halligan has poison now. Where is this going? Oh no… [ominous music]
HALLIGAN: “I’ve got something for you. Apple schnapps, from Detective Halligan’s home distillery. My own brand. Would you like to have a taste?” [ominous music]
BEGGAR: “You serious? Alright, pal. I’m as dry as the bottom of a parrot’s cage.” [ominous music]
HALLIGAN: “Why don’t you drink it all? I don’t mind. And it’s a cracker, I can tell you.” [ominous music]
BEGGAR: “Cheers, mistah!” [ominous music]
HALLIGAN: “Cheers.” [ominous music swelling] [ded] This kills him instantly. Now you can rob the dead hobo for pocket change. Halligan has crossed the line here. I can safely say that, looking at this cover, I did not expect poisoning the homeless to be essential plot point. But… here we are. Admittedly, most adventure game protagonists are huge dicks. It feels weird in this case, because everything has been so grounded up to this point. Then again, the poisoning itself was grounded too. It wasn’t a magic sleeping potion – it was a lethal dose of alcohol. This is the point where I became fully committed to the game. Not only is Halligan weird, but he seems to have no regard for human life. I have no clue what he’s capable of now. Anything, really… Halligan puts his sick loot drops into the phone, and can finally call the museum. The woman the late beggar mentioned answers it. WOMAN: “Who are you, and why are you calling from a phone booth outside the museum?” WOMAN: “Has something happened in the street? Has the beggar been attacked again?” HALLIGAN: “Who? The beggar? Oh, no, no! Well, not exactly…” HALLIGAN: “Ehm, it’s a long story, and I- I doubt you’d be interested… I just wanted, ehm…” She rightfully hangs up. Stuck again. So it’s back to the Yard for answers. It turns out the woman is Dr. Turner’s daughter – Dr. Melanie Turner. She didn’t wanna talk to you because you didn’t know her first name, like some kind of mythological creature. Now, I could go right back to the phone, but, while I’m in the office, how about some more hostile conversations? Turns out, Lowry had a date with Janet. HALLIGAN: “I’d really like to know how a braggart like you managed to get a date with Janet.” 🤨 LOWRY: “Well, you know what, Halligan. Women do like a winner, don’t they?” 😎 Okay, I need to talk about Lowry more. Him floating above his chair adds so much to all these conversations. Even though he’s in the background, if Lowry was sitting in his chair, Halligan would be towering over him. Instead, he floats above his chair, and their gazes meet. Now, it could be a metaphor, and this is just how Halligan views Lowry. His social status is so far beyond him that he’s basically floating. Halligan’s a monkey looking at a Monolith – he just can’t comprehend it. Lowry just lords his superiority over him. This frame by itself says so much. And it’s safe to say it hasn’t gone unnoticed. Lowry awakened something in certain people that I still don’t understand. It could be the rivalry aspect (I’ve seen a lot of manga renditions), but then there are so many cross-overs, and things get… strange and abstract. It doesn’t even seem like I learned anything, I just feel more afraid of the world. Anyway, back to Oxford. HALLIGAN: “The bone is from the body of one of the victims of the Skeleton Murders. I take it you’ve read about them?” MELANIE: “Oh, good heavens, yes! What can I do for you?” HALLIGAN: “Couldn’t we discuss that inside?” MELANIE: “Certainly. Come on over, I’ll let you in.” Finally! Halligan meets Dr. Melanie Turner. Her father is away on a trip, and she’s wary to answer the phone, because she gets weird calls. Halligan doesn’t bring up the dead beggar. It’s not a big surprise – typically, adventure games hope you forget stuff like that. Getting Melanie’s help at all was an excellent idea. So far, she’s the first character not to be openly hostile or dismissive towards Halligan. She’s so much better that you actually play as her for this little section. The background is way more interesting than anything I’ve seen so far. Being able to use tools to investigate, instead of just arguing with people is a nice change of pace. She finds gold embedded in a mark on the bone and matches the mark up to… a sickle! And studying a magazine gives us the answer we’ve been waiting for. MELANIE: “According to the historian Arthur Blake, the Britannic Druids carried out very bloody sacrificial rites.” MELANIE: “He found out that such rites took place at major celebrations of the Celts. He assumes that consecrated golden sickles were used for those rites.” HALLIGAN: “And how does he know about these things?” MELANIE: “He learned about it from old inscriptions he’s translating at the moment. Interesting, huh?” HALLIGAN: “Hmm… Celts, Druids… Quite some time has passed since then, hasn’t it?” MELANIE: “Of course, but the descriptions in the article absolutely match the findings on your bone, Mr. Halligan.” MELANIE: “I’m sure the author of the article can help you.” It’s a long shot, but it’s the best lead so far. Melanie is an expert on ritual sacrifice, so she’s a godsend. So of course, Halligan tells her that he thinks it’s weird for a girl to know about that. No choice but to visit Arthur Blake, the Druid expert. HALLIGAN: “Ah, it says “Blake”. This must be the place.” HALLIGAN: “I’m a detective from Scotland Yard. I have a few questions I need to ask you.” BLAKE: “Scotland Yard? What’s this about? Is something wrong?” He kind of sounds like a basier Howard Stern. His office is nice, and he clearly parties. There is a lot you can interact with for fun, including… HALLIGAN: “An oil painting. It’s not quite to my taste.” It can’t be… ♪ "Hoo~" ♪
BRIGGS: ♪ “What more can a poor boy do, working for the likes of me and you?” ♪ ♪ "Wap-wap-wa-hoo~" ♪
BRIGGS: ♪ “What more can a poor boy do, working for the likes of me and you?” ♪ ♪ "Wap-wa-" ♪
BRIGGS: ♪ “What more can a poor boy do, working for the likes of me and you?” ♪ As it turns out, Melanie wasn’t kidding when she said Blake was an expert. If you keep asking questions, he will go on about Druid lore for over 20 minutes. So I’m gonna go ahead and abridge the absolute hell out of that. Blake explains what happened in the first cutscene of the game. BLAKE: “It says that the last of the Druids saw the fall of their priesthood coming, in the year 1000 AD.” BLAKE: “In the confusion surrounding the final destruction of the order, a demonic superior druid seized power, using his knowledge of Druid magic,” BLAKE: “not for the good of his people, nor to honor his gods, but to submit all of mankind to his rule.” BLAKE: “In order to secure the survival of the Druids’ tradition, and to complete his devilish work,” BLAKE: “he organized a final ritual, transferring the knowledge and power of the last of the Druids to five infants.” BLAKE: “These infants have always been referred to as The Inheritors.” HALLIGAN: “Go on.” BLAKE: “The Druids’ Inheritors require the life force of other people to complete the ritual.” HALLIGAN: “I see. And how do they do that?” BLAKE: “According to legend, the flesh has to be cut off the bones of living humans, and to be eaten. Only then can their life force be transferred.” HALLIGAN: “You mean, the victims of these skeleton murders were practically eaten alive by cannibals?” BLAKE: “By druids… yes.” HALLIGAN: “I don’t believe it!” 😮 BLAKE: “The worst is yet to come Mr. Halligan.” HALLIGAN: “What? What can possibly be worse than that?” Worse?
HALLIGAN: “What? What can possibly be worse than that?” HALLIGAN: “What? What can possibly be worse than that?” BLAKE: “If such skeletons have been found in London, bearing marks of a golden sickle, it can only mean one thing:” BLAKE: “the Inheritors are preparing for the perfection of their final ritual.” HALLIGAN: “Which means?” BLAKE: “The myth says: once the ritual has been completed, the world will become a place governed by evil.” BLAKE: “Dark magic will be unleashed upon the world, and mankind will have but one choice: to obey or to die.” Okay, that’s a lot. The stakes have risen somewhere into the goddamn stratosphere if they’re true, and of course Halligan believes it. Blake explains that, to complete the ritual, they’ll need an item called The Amulet of Transformation. Shockingly, Halligan does wanna see proof. Yep, there it is. Must be true. It’s easy for your eyes to glaze over it, with a lore dump like this, but I did notice that “Why are you in the wheelchair?” question is almost always available. It’s like Halligan is barely paying attention and just really, REALLY wants to know why he’s in a wheelchair. The answer is “the Droods”, because it’s always the Droods. Blake heavily implies he was attacked by them at a book signing. This could be more common in England than I think. Maybe a Druid hit J. K. Rowling over the head with a blackjack or something. It was probably before the fourth “Harry Potter” book. Oh, wow, yeah, don’t write about Druids, everybody – they don’t like that. So Blake sends Halligan off to France to try and find the amulet. This moment marks the beginning of the Salt Arc. It’s the deadliest in the game, and you’ll soon see why. You save for sure before this! [calm French music] It may look and sound pleasant, but I’ve legitimately had nightmares about this screen. HALLIGAN: “Hello, captain!” CAPTAIN: “Hm. Bonjour.” 😒 HALLIGAN: “How are you?” CAPTAIN: “Hm. All right.” 😒 HALLIGAN: “You’re not being very talkative.” CAPTAIN: “No.” 😒 HALLIGAN: “Oh, well, thanks for the conversation.” CAPTAIN: “You’re welcome.” 😒 Well, that was enlightening, so let’s try the fisherman. HALLIGAN: “I like your fishing rod. It’s a beauty.” PIERRE: “Yes, nice, isn’t it? It’s an enhanced fiberglass Telescope Ultralight 47. The latest model.” 🥰 Man, he loves that fishing rod… The fisherman has a lot more to say, and confirms there’s a ruined ancient castle in the area. So Halligan runs off to the castle and- YOU HAVE FAILED THE SALT ARC! If you leave, there’s a good chance you’ve soft-locked yourself. I’m not even sure that going to the castle causes it. For a while, I even thought that not picking up the burnt grass could cause it. I don’t think that anymore, but I still have no clue. This is your home until you figure out what to do. The answer to that is you keep talking to the fisherman, until he tells you the captain’s name. Addressing the captain by his full name is the only way he’ll talk to people. Didn’t that just happen? Why is this happening again? It could be an old German custom. Maybe if you knew a guard’s full name in the Holy Roman Empire, they let you by the tollbooth castle for free? Or the developers just wanna make life harder. HALLIGAN: “…capitaine Charles DeNeuve, aren’t you?” CAPTAIN: “Yes, that is correct, my boy! Charles DeNeuve, capitaine of the Merchant Navy of France. How do you know my name?” ☺️ HALLIGAN: “I’ve been talking to a friend of yours – the fisherman over there at the jetty.” CAPTAIN: “Pierre? Ah, yes, old Pierre!” 🙂 Now it’s the opposite problem, where the captain never stops talking. He’ll tell batshit stories, but keep him going. Don’t you dare let him stop! Not until he tells you about the Druids. CAPTAIN: “Around 1000 AD, the Druids came there. You’ve heard of the Druids, I take it?” HALLIGAN: “Oh, yes. Quite a lot, in fact. Go on. Where did these Druids come from?” CAPTAIN: “They were the last of the Druids from Britain.” HALLIGAN: “Really?” 😮 (🥱) CAPTAIN: “Yes, really, my boy!” CAPTAIN: “One day, a salt seller by the name of Gergan came to the castle of Carmors and asked the evil Lord for a drink of water.” CAPTAIN: “But the lord set his dogs on the man.” HALLIGAN: “Go on.” CAPTAIN: “Out of revenge for the Lord’s cruelty, Gergan hurled a handful of salt at the castle, which tumbled down immediately, burying the Lord beneath it.” HALLIGAN: “But why?” CAPTAIN: “It was an ancient Druid curse.” That’s fine, but that opens more questions. HALLIGAN: “How can salt destroy a whole castle?” 🤨 CAPTAIN: “Through the magic of the Druids.” 🙃 I hate how things are explained SO MUCH. HALLIGAN: “That’s salt.” Okay, there’s salt on the boat, so how do we get that? Something needs to reach it, like a fishing rod. The fisherman loves it so much that he won’t even let Halligan borrow it. So Halligan starts probing for weaknesses. HALLIGAN: “The captain has a cat?” PIERRE: “Yes. He lets her out here on the jetty in the morning and takes her back in at night, and the damned beast spends all day slinking around here.” HALLIGAN: “You don’t like cats?” PIERRE: “I hate cats! They steal the fish from my bucket, or get tangled up in my fishing line…” That’s all you need. If the cat now appears, you’re good. If it doesn’t show up, you need to repeat the ritual. More stories for you! So what you do here is, eh… SHAMMY: “It’s called a fucking waiting puzzle!” Ah, yeah, it’s a- It’s a waiting puzzle… [clocks ticking] Okay, here’s how to do it: creepily lie in wait until you can properly ambush the cat. Use Janet’s scarf – she’ll never get it back at this point. CAT: "Meaow!" 🙀 CAT: (muffled) "Meaow!" 😾 HALLIGAN: “Captain DeNeuve’s cat. A rather stubborn beast, and on top of that it has fleas as well.” 😒 Halligan then unleashes that on the fisherman, to knock his bait in the water. This puts the idyllic fishing visit on hold. PIERRE: “It’s that damn cat again! She’s knocked all my bait in the water! That’s the third time this week!” 😠 HALLIGAN: “Calm down, you can always get some new baits.” PIERRE: “What about my fishing tackle? What about my Telescope Ultralight 47 for 800 francs?” PIERRE: “I can’t leave it here unguarded! It could be stolen! I’ll have to take everything with me, just because of that damned cat.” HALLIGAN: “Don’t worry, Pierre, I’ll keep an eye on your things.” 😇 (😈) PIERRE: “Would you?” HALLIGAN: “Of course! No problem.” PIERRE: “Thank you, my friend! Then I’ll go right now.” [darkly triumphant music] Yeah, Halligan straight up robs him here. He scrapes the salt off the boat and never returns the Ultralight fishing rod. I’ve legitimately had a nightmare about that fisherman at the end of a long, dark tunnel. Who knows what he could have caught with such an amazing rod? SCIENTIST: “According to my theory, it looks like this.” [appropriately dramatic music sting] NOW you go to the castle. [melancholic music] Yeah, this seems right. You’ll find two items in the castle: jack and shit. So check the cemetery next door, using the useless case file to open up the gate. Maybe the captain should have given out a key instead. It’s a big cemetery with a lot to explore, but Halligan is also being watched. I’d prefer to hurry. I was wandering here for a while, because it’s not clear what to do. It’s actually simple: you just need to inspect a certain grave – if it’s hollow at the top, it’s good to go. The next step is obvious: take the salt from the boat and then crush it up with the victim’s bone from earlier. You know, I did toy with the idea of having a Halligan Crime Counter, but I’m not a lawyer or anything. This also isn’t taking place in my country. Still, Halligan is using forensic evidence to crush up salt in the cemetery. I think most countries would call that “perversion of justice”. Anyhow, the next step is clear. [*CRASH*] HALLIGAN: “It seems to have worked!” 😮 Why would that work for Halligan? Why would that work at all?! He’s not a- Wut? But… CAPTAIN: “Through the magic of the Druids.” 🙃 Fine, get the medallion, leave the mausoleum, the Salt Arc is over. Unfortunately, on the ferry ride back, Halligan wants to chase seagulls up on the deck or something. So he looks around, finds a good hiding spot and then leaves to do… whatever he does. [grumbling of the boat engine] HALLIGAN: “God, what’s been going on here?! Someone’s broken into my cabin and searched through all my things!” HALLIGAN: “The amulet… Where’s the amulet?! It’s been stolen! I don’t believe it!” BLAKE: “Did you find the amulet?” HALLIGAN: “That’s a long story.” BLAKE: “Stolen?! How did that happen?” HALLIGAN: “No idea! I hid it in my cabin during the crossing. Someone broke in and rummaged through all my luggage.” BLAKE: “Was anything else missing?” HALLIGAN: “No, not a thing.” BLAKE: “Someone must have been following you.” HALLIGAN: “I didn’t notice anyone. Who could have known I’d been looking for an amulet in that God forsaken dump?” BLAKE: “Certain people may be taking a great interest in your investigations, Mr. Halligan. Do not underestimate the power of the Druids.” Fa-antastic… I’m just so glad the Salt Arc is over. Never again does the game have so many back-to-back dialogue trees that you have to answer in a very specific order that’s ultimately… pointless. We don’t see those characters again, and we don’t go back to the castle. Having a weird timer, borderline sneaking section is a terrible idea, and the threat of a soft lock is always looming over you. What I find noteworthy is that characters who don’t know Halligan yet are either polite or just, kind of, you know, cordial with him. Without fail, Halligan will then take advantage of them to do God knows what. It makes the entire beginning of the game fall perfectly into place. Halligan’s co-workers KNOW him. They’re perfectly aware that Halligan thinks more like an insect and will screw them over at the first opportunity. They alluded to a ton already. LOWRY: “You eat pitzer in your office, and I go to the cinema with Janet. That’s the way things work.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Back on track, Blake explains the villains are actually called Neo-Druids. Blake hypes them up as essentially being “Deus Ex” villains, and implies that they’re running the Illuminati. Back to the Yard to research them. MILLER: “HALLIGAN?! INTO MY OFFICE, AT ONCE!” 😡 HALLIGAN: “Uh-oh, that doesn’t sound good…” 😬 MILLER: “Come on in! I suppose we should be glad that you drop in now and then.” HALLIGAN: “What’s the matter, Chief?” MILLER: “You know, Halligan, I was just asking myself, what you’ve been doing?” HALLIGAN: “I’ve been INVESTIGATING, Chief.” MILLER: “Well, have you? And do you know what I’VE been doing?” MILLER: “I’ve been dismissing loads of press people, worried citizens and politicians from my office!” MILLER: “The phone hasn’t stopped ringing since this morning, the mayor’s been to my office, and I haven’t seen much of YOU.” 😑 MILLER: “When do you expect to come up with results?!” HALLIGAN: “Very well then. I was visiting an expert on Druids.” MILLER: “You were WOT? Halligan, have you lost your marbles?!” 🤯 MILLER: “You’re not supposed to be indulging in your hobbies, you’re supposed to be solving the Skeleton Murders!” HALLIGAN: “Is that all, Chief?” MILLER: “No, that is NOT all. One of the phone calls this morning was from the 4th district, in Oxford.” HALLIGAN: “Uh-huh, and?” MILLER: “A beggar has been to see them. He claimed that somebody had first put him to sleep, and then robbed him.” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “A beggar has been to see them. He claimed that somebody had first put him to sleep, and then robbed him.” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “And do you know who that person was? No?” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “A man who calls himself Detective Halligan!!” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “Our colleagues looked into the central personal database, and guess what? They FOUND a man by the name of Detective Halligan.” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “And he WORKS FOR MY DEPARTMENT!” [menacing music theme]
MILLER: “What do you say to that?” 😑 Holy shit, I did not see that coming back! HALLIGAN: “When did you receive the phone call from our colleagues?” 😐 (😬) MILLER: “Oh, less than half an hour ago. Have you any idea how embarrassed I was about the affair?” MILLER: “The colleague I talked to said that the beggar still had some of the substance he’d been knocked out with. Medical alcohol with apple juice.” MILLER: “Halligan, please tell me you didn’t do it?” 😟 HALLIGAN: “I had nothing to do with it, Chief, honestly!” 🤥 MILLER: “Well, I hope so, for your benefit! From now on I expect you to start looking into the case at hand!” HALLIGAN: “Chief, the beggar must be mistaken! It’s a mix-up!” 🥺 MILLER: “A mix-up? I hope so. If these accusations turn out to be true, you can spend the rest of your professional life WASHING POLICE CARS!” MILLER: “Now get out and do your job!” MILLER: “And, Halligan, if I should hear that you are conducting your investigations in any dubious or illegal way…” MILLER: “I’ll take you off the case immediately!” 😠 HALLIGAN: “Understood, Chief.” 😐 (😝) Halligan is officially on thin ice. Let’s check his voice mails. MOTHER: “Brent…?” MOTHER: “Hello…?” MOTHER: “Is that you?” MOTHER: “It’s your mother.” MOTHER: “I haven’t heard anything from you for months now, Brent.” MOTHER: “Is that any way to treat your mother?” HALLIGAN: “Oh, God, that’s all I need…” 😒 He’s ignoring his elderly mother? What? CLERK: “Hello, sir. This is Al’s Pizza Palace.” CLERK: “Your account from last quarter has not yet been paid. It amounts to £275.” CLERK: “Please see to it within the next few days, otherwise we will have to stop serving you.” HALLIGAN: “£275? Wow, that’s my personal record.” 😮 Okay, stop… The smoking problem seemed ridiculous, but Halligan has a pizza tab. Is there such thing as a pizza tab? I like it a lot, but that’s a different level. Since Halligan mentioned the Bank of England earlier, I used their inflation calculator. Halligan would now owe about $600 US in pizza money. Combine that with a carton a week, and how is he not dead? His boss also left angry messages, and the “Deus Ex” Druids left threats, but that’s not nearly as interesting. Halligan is still locked out of the database, so he puts together an elaborate plan. He’ll have the Chief sign a requisition form for more pencil sharpeners. Under that will be charcoal paper, and under that will be the real information form. Two major problems: the charcoal sticks out and can be seen, and Halligan is Halligan. HALLIGAN: “Do you know how to operate the copying machine?” LOWRY: “Yes, I do.” HALLIGAN: “But you’re not going to tell me, right?” LOWRY: “You really are a clever boy, Halligan.” 😊 (😝) [copy machine humming] Alright then, we need to get the scissors. LOWRY: “Halligan!” HALLIGAN: “Yes…?” LOWRY: “Might I ask you what you think you’re doing?” HALLIGAN: “I just wanted to borrow your scissors. Just for five minutes.” LOWRY: “Forget it!” HALLIGAN: “Don’t make such a fuss about your blasted scissors! I won’t break them.” LOWRY: “Oh, you won’t break them, Halligan. You’ll lose them, mislay them, not bring them back…” 🙄 LOWRY: “You’ll do with them what you always do with anything you lay your hands on!” LOWRY: “I am determined not to lose anything ever again, Halligan. Especially not to you! Do I make myself clear?” 😑 That’s justified. Lowry’s scissors might be the only thing left bounding him to material world. Getting them will mean trying a new tactic. LOWRY: “Hey, I’ve had enough! Get your paws off my scissors, will you?!” Third tactic… Halligan may be locked out of making outside calls, but he can still call within the department. So, using the angry boss voice mail, he can trick him out of his office. Just another normal day in the Scotland Yard. The deed is done, and the Chief falls for it. MILLER: “You need new stationary again?! Halligan, you’ll lead this department to financial ruin someday, d’you know that?” HALLIGAN: “Yes, sir. I- I mean, no, sir! It’s nothing extravagant. I could do with a new pencil sharpener, that’s all.” MILLER: “When will you learn to take better care of your things, Halligan?” Finally, database access! Even in movies where cops are being set up to take a fall, they have less obstacles than this! Just point me to the nearest radical Druid! JANET: “Somebody once filed a complaint against Lord Sinclair for disturbing the nightly peace.” HALLIGAN: “Is that all?” That is not workable at all. JANET: “Some months ago, a gardener was killed on Sinclair’s estate, and the murderer was never found.” JANET: “After the murder, Lord Sinclair and his order were under surveillance for some time, but there was nothing conspicuous to be found.” HALLIGAN: “Huh, that’s interesting…” This is starting to seem like an investigation almost… It’s a genuine surprise after so much nonsense. LOWRY: “Halligan! Where are my scissors?!” 😠 HALLIGAN: “I’ve no idea! I thought they were on your desk just a minute ago.” 😕 (🤭) LOWRY: “Don’t lie to me, Halligan! I know you’ve got them! And what was that business with the Chief all about?” HALLIGAN: “I really don’t know what you’re talking about, Steve.” LOWRY: “Let me make myself clear: I hate that kind of thing, Halligan! I’ve had quite enough trouble with the Chief for one day, thank you.” LOWRY: “Now tell me what it is you want.” HALLIGAN: “Nothing, really.” 🙃 LOWRY: “Then get out!” 😡 Halligan shows surprising foresight by making a report copy for Melanie. And wouldn’t you know it, an old friend is there too! HALLIGAN: “Hello! Haven’t seen you for a while.” BEGGAR: “You! You get lost, you crook!” 😠 BEGGAR: “You nicked all my pennies! Me last 60 pence!” BEGGAR: “It’s bad enough I get robbed and the police do nothing about it, now you coppers are nicking the stuff yourselves!” HALLIGAN: “Hey, hey, you shouldn’t see it like that!” HALLIGAN: “Let’s say it was... business. I really needed money for the phone, and you got my lovely home-made schnapps in return.” BEGGAR: “Blegh!” This does show Halligan’s not a complete psychopath, but instead justifies his actions. That could actually make him scarier. I don’t know… The Sinclair estate could have the answers. [laid-back galloping] HALLIGAN: “Scotland Yard, please open the door.” BUTLER: “I regret that His Lordship does NOT receive beggars, salesmen and police officers as a matter of principle, sir.” BUTLER: “Besides, Lord Sinclair is not at home at present.” Dammit! Now, there is a hedge on the right side, but there’s a fence and it’s electrified. Halligan can’t scam through physical objects yet. So, going to the other side, you meet a kindly gardener. He’s very friendly and open about anything suspicious he’s seen. It doesn’t amount to much. He HAS heard therapeutic scream exercises out in the back yard though. What a helpful man! Of course Halligan would think to start a raging wildfire. That way, when the gardener runs for help, the detective can steal his hedge clippers. It’s like getting a scissors upgrade! Good thing, too, because you’ll need both to breach the fence. And, as Lowry predicted, the scissors are destroyed. Getting through the fence feels like being at the DMV, but once you do, you are rewarded. JACK: “How do you do, Mr. Halligan? How nice of you to visit us.” HALLIGAN: “You know my name?” JACK: “Certainly. Lord Sinclair has been expecting you.” HALLIGAN: “He has? Is that boss of yours some kind of psychic or what?” JACK: “Why don’t you ask him that yourself? Let’s go!” They walk all the way to the door in this cutscene – I’m skipping it. [sudden music sting] SINCLAIR: “Mr. Halligan! It is a great pleasure to meet you in person at long last!” Were they trying a jump-scare? HALLIGAN: “The pleasure’s mine. Would you mind telling your charming pet gorilla here to point his damn pistol somewhere else?” SINCLAIR: “Please forgive us this precautionary measure, Mr. Halligan. I happen to be a distrustful man.” SINCLAIR: “Jack.” HALLIGAN: “Lord Sinclair, now that we’ve met, there are a few questions I’d really like to ask you.” SINCLAIR: “Certainly, certainly. After dinner I will answer any questions you deem to ask me.” SINCLAIR: “Until then, please be my guest. Jack, please be good enough to show our guest to his chamber.” HALLIGAN: “You do not seem to be quite aware of the situation you are in, Lord Sinclair. I’m a detective from Scotland Yard.” It takes Halligan 2 straight minutes of conversation to understand that he’s being captured, so I’ll spare you that. You’re imprisoned, so, do you click the bed to pass the time? No. Instead, admire the artwork. You keep admiring it – it’s famous. So night falls and Halligan attempts an escape. Part of it is logical, part of it is… moon logic. For example, removing a nail from the wall by using an entire painting. I’m amazed at how much I still don’t accept this in adventure games. [heart-rending scream] HALLIGAN: “What was that?!” [more screams of agony] The escape works, and it kind of looks like the “Resident Evil” mansion. There’s no sign of Palpatine, but you do find armor of his from the 1400’s. He MUST be one of the Inheritor Super-babies that the Demon-Drood made. The table is also prepared as promised. There’s still not much to go off of, except for pictograms of strange symbols and these drawings on the wall. The gardener did say that the screaming was out back, so that’s the place to look. And there is something to see! [echoing scream of pain] HALLIGAN: “Hey, what the…!” [strained huffing and quick footsteps] [scream of agonizing pain fades in]
[strained huffing and quick footsteps] [the victim shrieks at the top of his lungs non-stop] [all the sounds fade out] SINCLAIR: “Well, Mr. Halligan, I don’t believe I have introduced you to the gentlemen of my club yet.” SINCLAIR: “This is general Myers of the British Army.” SINCLAIR: “Next to him is Bishop Stevenson.” Sinclair goes through all the Druid Illuminati members (don’t worry, we’ll never see them again). As it turns out, they were waiting for Halligan, who has wasted no time before eating. SINCLAIR: “As you may have noticed, the meat we are eating at this meal has a rather unique flavor.” SINCLAIR: “It is human flesh, Mr. Halligan.” SINCLAIR: “This flesh is the source of life force. It grants us strength and power.” SINCLAIR: “You will soon discover the incomparable feeling of power for yourself.” [*DON*] [*DON*]
SINCLAIR:“It will be grander than any feeling you have ever felt. Very soon now-” SINCLAIR:“It will be grander than any feeling you have ever felt. Very soon now-” Wait, he’s still eating it! But- Wait… Wait-wait, wait… Okay, there could be a few thing happening here. Is Halligan under mind control? Does he not care about eating human flesh? Was he just not listening again? Is he trying to trick them? Could this all be a “Five Nights at Freddy’s” prequel? SINCLAIR: “…a world ruled by Druids.” It could be any… SINCLAIR: “I must admit, your investigations had us worried for a moment, Mr. Halligan.” SINCLAIR: “We had even made plans to put a stop to them by arranging a little accident.” SINCLAIR: “But you are a very lucky man.” SINCLAIR: “You will witness the great day yourself, and you will be there on the right side, for, by eating this flesh, you have become one of us.” SINCLAIR: “Welcome to the Circle, Mr. Halligan!” I’m not sure if worrying that Halligan will sniff you out makes you incompetent, but letting him join you 100% is. He won’t be such a good Drood when you see your phone and pizza bill… So now it’s up to Melanie to solve the mystery of the Druids. She’s a lot smarter than the Human Beetle Halligan is, so I like her chances. She follows Halligan’s report, immediately figures out that they’re lying, and then breaks in herself. There are some rocks on the ground. That’s… cool? I can just break for the window. JACK: “Stop! Stop right there!” JACK: “Hey... What is that?” MELANIE: “Leave me alone, you bastards!” NOT JACK: “Well, well, there’s no need to be that upset. What are you doing here, sweetheart? Are you looking for something?” MELANIE: “I, ehm… I…” NOT JACK: “She got through the hole in the fence.” JACK: “Oh-oh-oh, little lady, you shouldn’t have done that. Now Lord Sinclair will have a surprise guest for his dinner tonight.” MELANIE: “What? What are you going to do to me?” NOT JACK: “You’ll find out soon enough, sweetheart.” That’s… creepy. [tapping on the keyboard] I didn’t mess with this in editing – it looks like I’m stuck. Well, I- Oh! MELANIE: “Mr. Halligan! Oh, God, I’m so glad to see you! What are you doing here?” HALLIGAN: “I’m preparing dinner.” MELANIE: “You’re having dinner with Lord Sinclair? That bastard got me locked in here! I really don’t want to have dinner with someone like that!” HALLIGAN: “You’re not being asked.” MELANIE: “What? Mr. Halligan, is everything all right with you?” HALLIGAN: “Come with me, Ms. Turner.” MELANIE: “Where?” HALLIGAN: “Into the garden. I have to prepare dinner.” MELANIE: “In the garden? Mr. Halligan, what are you talking about? What’s wrong with you?!” HALLIGAN: “Come with me, Ms. Turner. Dinner will be ready soon, and you will be our guest of honor.” W- What? The end? Game over. Who would think this game has a bad ending? Pardon me, I meant an ending where you can lose the game. Guess I’ll try that again… Of course, this was a sneaking mission. Using the rock you found, you could distract the guards all the way to the front of the building. N-now you can move in to the window. JACK: “Stop! Stop right there!” WAT?! HOW?! GRISHNAKH URAKHA [Paratopic gibberish] You have to hide in the second bush first. I don’t know why. She gets in, and this room is more Halloween appropriate. I’m still processing how 0 to 100 the violence got. I think the screams distracted me from just how fucking brutal it was. Maybe that can set a radical shift in tone. This room is full of wonders! MELANIE: “That looks interesting.” [humming and crackling] Neat! But it’s not important. Neither is the skull totem, the sacrificial blood altar, or the… bone bucket. Instead, there is a more clever puzzle. Significant parts of the painting line up with a safe combination. And wouldn’t you know it, the amulet is back, along with a parchment I can’t read. It could be important to Plapatine, I just don’t know yet. Maybe Blake can know more. So we head down the- Uh-oh! [jangling of keys] MELANIE: “Mr. Halligan! God, what a relief!” [*slap*]
MELANIE: "Ah!" MELANIE: “What is that for?!” [*slap*] MELANIE: “Have you gotten mad?! What’s wrong, Brent, why are you hitting me?!” HALLIGAN: “Who are you?! What are you doing here?!” [*slap*] MELANIE: “Oh, God, stop it! What’s the matter with you?! Don’t you recognize me?!” MELANIE: “Brent, stop it!” [dramatic in-game music] You have something he needs for a puzzle – your life is over. [dramatic in-game music] [*thonk*] [coughing] MELANIE: “Brent, you bloody idiot!” That is such an understatement… I do like how they played shocking music stings, like Halligan doing that is supposed to be surprising. Him doing that’s not a shock – the whole game set it up. He just does whatever he wants. HALLIGAN: “What- What happened?” MELANIE: “Brent! Is that you? Do you recognize me?” HALLIGAN: “Of course I recognize you! Bloody hell, what’s going on?! Oh my God, I’m feeling sick… Everything’s spinning…” MELANIE: “I had to hit you over the head. You were acting like a madman!” HALLIGAN: “Wait, I just have to get it together for a moment. Oh, Melanie, you can’t imagine what I’ve gone through here!” 😖 YOU? Someone died! In fact, you helped eat him! At a late brunch with Count Dooku and the White Glove Society! Halligan claims eating the human flesh messed with his brain. You can’t be mind-controlled BEFORE eating the mind-control poison. Still, kind-hearted Melanie accepts his story of alleged mind control for why he was slapping her. GUARD: “OPEN THE DOOR! OPEN IT AT ONCE!” MELANIE: “The guards, Brent! They’re at the door! We have to leave!” GUARD: “OPEN THE DOOR! JACK, GET THE KEY!” HALLIGAN: “Yeah, Melanie, I think you’re right! We really should get out of here, and we should do it now!” HALLIGAN: “We made it!” WHAT?! I...
MELANIE: “Yes, thank God…” I’ve done a lot of abridging – far too much invisible work to really count anymore – but I did not edit that AT ALL. That’s the big escape. HALLIGAN: “We have to go, Melanie! Now!” MELANIE: “Where?” HALLIGAN: “To Mr. Blake. If anybody can tell us something about the incidents in this house – he can.” MELANIE: “Okay, let’s move.” HALLIGAN: “Mr. Blake…” Jesus Christ, they’re really picking up the pace, huh? Well, you know how Blake scenes go, so I’ll try to condense it. Essentially, he starts raving in a series of Jaden Smith tweets. Something about how Droods think time and space is bullshit. A nearby ruin, called Twelve Bridges, may hold the key, but it’s uncertain. He can’t translate the parchment yet, without a rare book. He suspects that Sinclair is trying to stop people from time traveling to… stop him? That’ll help to tighten up our story – time travel! Hah, fuk, I can’t read it… So Halligan goes off to the Oxford Library, while Melanie goes home, to do… something. They don’t say, so I’m guessing they just didn’t know what to do with her here. Well, Halligan shouldn’t have a problem, because the Bodleian Library is the second largest in Britain. When I was in school, and for work sometimes, I would use their online database all the time. They have MOUNTAINS of good information. So when Halligan goes in, he’s gated off by one mean librarian who won’t help him. You could try to look for the book manually, but… oh… that’s not happening. The library does have a single computer. It’s being used by a senile old man who keeps forgetting why he’s there, and he also refuses to get up. He does make the mistake of revealing that his car is parked out front. Plus, he left the windows cracked, because it’s a hot day. Halligan can easily fish the lock open with the wire from that electric fence. You remember that, right? The wire. The one ri-ight down there. Shockingly, you can go back if you missed it, but… wow… [car alarm going off] HASTINGS: “What’s going on here?! What are you doing to my car?!” 😠 HALLIGAN: “Me? I didn’t do anything.” 🤨 HASTINGS: “Well, the car alarm’s not in the habit of going off by itself! Here, what’s this? Someone’s been fiddling with the door handle!” 😯 HALLIGAN: “Well, it wasn’t me.” HASTINGS: “Well, I don’t see anybody else.” HALLIGAN: “Do you really think I would break into your car, and then just stand around here, waiting for you?” 🤨 Yeah, that'd be kind of psychotic, wouldn’t it? What you SHOULD do is plant a library book on him first. That way, when he tries to run out, he will trip the security alarm and get detained. Now that a confused old man is being sent to the spice mines, you can finally look up a library book. You would think that would be the end of it, but no – it’s their reference copy. You’re not allowed to check that one out. So, go back, disguise it with a different book jacket, and now you can get it. The new book makes the librarian instantly friendly. A lot is weird about this scene, but I wanna keep it moving. Blake gets the book and begins the translations. He also implies that Melanie may have feelings for Halligan. Could it be love? HALLIGAN: “I’m touched at your concern.” 😌 MELANIE: “Now, don’t go imagining things. After all that’s happened, it’s only natural that I should be worried about you… AND Mr. Blake.” 😏 Apparently, the “something” she was doing was a little more than nothing. She stopped by the Scotland Yard, and Saruman is pressing charges for burglary. Even worse, Halligan is now officially off the Force. HALLIGAN: “Don’t tell me he’s handing the case back to that thickheaded bigmouth Lowry!” MELANIE: “I wouldn’t know. All he said was that he expects you to hand the file to him as soon as you get back to the Yard.” HALLIGAN: “I certainly will not. This business is just too important to let go. I don’t care what the Chief says. I’m gonna carry this case through on my own.” HALLIGAN: “What’s going on out there?!” [rumbling and menacing music] MELANIE: “What is it?! What’s happening?!” [rumbling and menacing music] CPT. BLAKEBEARD: “Leave me! Get out of the danger zone! Here, take the parchment and go!” What happened to his voice? HALLIGAN: “Come on, Mr. Blake, let’s get out of here!” BLAKE: “You get out of here, I’ll follow you!” Oh, it’s back now. So they’re gonna leave an old man in a wheelchair and not push him out? [shattering glass] BLAKE: “Get outta here! Quickly, run!” [*wzyo-ow-BOOSH*] HOLY SHIT! [crackling of fire] SINCLAIR: (echoing) “I believe you have something of mine, Mr. Halligan. I shall give you until sunset to give my property back to me.” The random intense violence is gonna keep me on edge. First, the man is randomly carved up alive, and now, without warning, someone could be completely obliterated by a Predator drone strike. I didn’t think Druids would have that kind of thing! What IS the mystery of the Druids anyhow? The killings? We know they’re doing that. How long do they stare at the explosion? HALLIGAN: “Oh, God, Mr. Blake! I have to go back and get him out of there!” MELANIE: “Are you crazy? Don’t go! It’s pointless, you can’t help him anymore – he’s dead…” HALLIGAN: “Yeah, you’re right…” HALLIGAN: “Oh my God, what an inferno! Let’s get out of here, Melanie, otherwise we’ll be next!” MELANIE: “Where CAN we go? To Scotland Yard?” HALLIGAN: “No, that’s not a good idea. The Chief Inspector’s waiting for me there.” HALLIGAN: “We have to try to move the Gate of the Worlds. If we want to stop Sinclair, we have to stop those who gave him his power a 1000 years ago.” MELANIE: “You believe in that Gate of the Worlds thing? It’s just a myth! A fairy tale!” HALLIGAN: “The question is not whether I believe in it, Melanie – the question is whether we have any other options?” Time travel is the only way. And now things get… emotional. HALLIGAN: “Could I ask you something personal?” 😳 MELANIE: “That depends on just how personal it is, Brent.” HALLIGAN: “What did you think of me when I first came to your museum?” 😳 MELANIE: “What did I think? Brent, do I really have to tell you?” HALLIGAN: “Of course you don’t HAVE TO. But I’d like to know…” 🥺 MELANIE: “I’ll tell you, but only if you promise not to be angry with me.” 😏 HALLIGAN: “Oh God, is it that bad?” 😯 MELANIE: “Well, do you promise?” 😏 That’s not a choice. I HAVE TO know. HALLIGAN: “Okay, I promise.” 😞 MELANIE: “I thought “This unshaven bloke’s wearing a totally unfashionable coat”.” 😏 HALLIGAN: “What? That’s what you thought?” 😦 MELANIE: “Yes!” 🙂 HALLIGAN: “And was that all you thought?” 🥺 MELANIE: “You ask a lot of questions, Brent. I think that’s enough for a start.” 😏 HALLIGAN: “Are you married?” 😳 MELANIE: “Oh, well, ehm…” 😐 HALLIGAN: “Was that too… private a question?” 😟 MELANIE: “Yes. No… Oh, I don’t know!” 😖 HALLIGAN: “You don’t have to answer.” 😔 MELANIE: “It’s all right, Brent. I WAS married. I got married as soon as I was 18, you know.” 😞 Melanie reveals she was in a socially pressured, borderline arranged marriage. He spent the entire time yelling at her, treating her like trash and cheating on her. Even after finally gathering the strength to divorce him, he continued to harass her for years. No wonder she hated strange calls, damn! MELANIE: “He even waited for me in front of the museum and swore at me. I had to call the police!” 😕 HALLIGAN: “Oh, God, what a psychopath!” 😧 I feel bad for her. Even as I puzzle my way up to the castle… Who would think the game would take such a dark and heavy turn? Anyways, then they time travel. [frightened screaming] [Susumu Hirasawa - The Girl In Byakkoya] HALLIGAN: “We’ve traveled back in time!” MELANIE: “You really think so?” HALLIGAN: “Uh-oh, here comes company.” MELANIE: “They look like soldiers!” HALLIGAN: “Don’t panic, let’s find out what they want-” [*smack*] They’ve been to past maybe 30 seconds, and both are captured. Look, even the menu has gone back in time! NOT JOHN: “What have we here then? Look, John, the Danish whore’s woken up!” MELANIE: “Point 1: I’m not a whore. Point 2: I’m not Danish.” NOT JOHN: “Do you hear that? Hah-hah-ha-hah-hah! She’s got a sharp tongue in her head! If you’re not Danish, what are ya?” Oh, this one goes on a while… Look, they’re not very good guards. NOT JOHN: “Wot?! John, you numbskull! I thought I told you to go to the market and buy some provisions!” 😡 JOHN: “Why me, blast it? Let HER go, the lazy so and so!” 😒 NOT JOHN: “Do you want her to escape? What a fool you are!” 😡 JOHN: “Don’t call me a fool!” 😠 NOT JOHN: “Then don’t BE a fool! Then I won’t call you one!” 😡 JOHN: “I said don’t call me a fool!” 😠 MELANIE: “Excuse me?” 😐 NOT JOHN: “Whaddayawant?!!” 🤬 Melanie offers to make them both love potions and they accept it. In fact, they demand it. I always thought love potions worked the opposite way. You give it to someone to make THEM like you, not you drink it to… like them more? The puzzle is to instead knock them out with poison. This is all a little familiar. Maybe her and Halligan WOULD make for a good couple… Oh, God, I think I’M starting to think in Halligan logic! It is amazing the guards are doing this and not expecting to be poisoned. This is a deceptive puzzle, too. You need to figure out what herbs make what colors in water, then combine the colors in the right order to make the poison. That doesn’t seem too bad, except, sometimes this happens. MELANIE: “Now it’s turned into a brown slop.” Oh, I failed… Dump that out, start over. Except, not really… Messing up makes the brown slop, but also, when you’re doing the correct recipe, that will also make a brown slop. That is so deceptive. MELANIE: “…the water in the bowl is absolutely clear.” So the guards get chaliced, and you’re free to go into basement. There is a front door, but there’s no getting out of it. HALLIGAN: “This really is one hell of a rat’s nest. Where are we, anyway?” Melanie needs to remind Halligan that they time-traveled. With Halligan freed, they then escape through a secret tunnel, which looks a lot like a maze. Thankfully, it’s not – just go wherever. MELANIE: “There’s not a glimmer of light here anywhere, Brent.” HALLIGAN: “Aghh…” MELANIE: “What was that?! Are you still there? Brent?” 😧 MELANIE: “Brent, this isn’t funny! Hello? Is that you... Brent?” 🥺 MELANIE: "Aaaaahhhhh1" Oh, the castle the evil mansion showed. I believe this makes for Halligan’s third imprisonment. Though, with all he’s done so far, he should probably be in one a lot longer. HALLIGAN: “I’d break my neck climbing down there…” DROOD: “We have been expecting you. We need you. You are the one all our hopes are hanging on.” HALLIGAN: “What’s that? You’ve been expecting ME? That’s impossible!” Of course he’s the chosen one! I wish I could explain more, but it’s never brought up again. This is Maglor, and he claims to be a good guy. An evil Druid named Serstan has taken over the order and is preparing the evil infant ritual. Halligan and Melanie will be executed if they don’t stop him in time. So, once again, you’re a prisoner, but free to wander wherever. There’s lots of storage rooms, a kitchen… HALLIGAN: “Crabs! They are for snobs.” 😒 There are a lot of rooms here. I have no clue where to go. I am flying completely blind. SERSTAN: “You? What do you want?” HALLIGAN: “I take it you’re Serstan. Am I right?” SERSTAN: (smugly laughs) SERSTAN: “And you are the man who came all the way here just to let me kill him.” Oh, this is Serstan, the Big Bad Guy! He’s just… hanging out in the office. SERSTAN: “When the great day has come and the ritual has been perfected, your lives will end.” HALLIGAN: “Why don’t you just kill us right now?” 🤨 SERSTAN: “You are indeed lucky to be allowed to live for a few more days. My brother Maglor spoke up for you, and I was incapable of refusing him his wish.” Is it just me, or does he sound a lot like Balthasar Gelt? SERSTAN: “There is nothing you can know. There is nothing you can bargain with. I will not enter into any deal with a useless creature like you.” SERSTAN: “I will grind you underfoot, if it pleases me to do so. That is all you may expect from me. Now get out of my sight!” [door closing] Shit… HALLIGAN: “Good grief! There must be hundreds of candles in here.” Okay, I’m still lost. Not sure where to go. SERSTAN: “Now what you want?! Are you so eager to die? Your death will come soon enough. Now get out!” 😠 HALLIGAN: “One moment please. Just one short moment. May I ask you one more question?” SERSTAN: “You do not need to ask questions. It would be a waste of time answering you. You would not understand the answers anyway.” [door closing] Well, there is a front door too, which means even more to explore in the courtyard. There is a smithy complete with a tortured gachimuchi blacksmith in it. He could help with a locked door somewhere, but his furnace keeps going out. I have no idea what to do outside, so I go back in. MELANIE: “Brent!” HALLIGAN: “Where have you been? I was worried about you!” 😨 MELANIE: “I was just having a look around, and then I ended up here in the library.” HALLIGAN: “Are you all right?” MELANIE: “Yes, I’m okay.” HALLIGAN: “Melanie, we’re in pretty serious trouble. What on Earth are you doing in here?” MELANIE: “Reading. They’ve got some really interesting books in here, Brent.” MELANIE: “Take this one for example – it’s a book on the monastery’s history. It was written by Christian monks. It says-” HALLIGAN: “Hold on, Melanie! Before you start your academic lecture-” Halligan, please listen… She knows about a secret escape passage, but it doesn’t register with him. He has more on his mind. HALLIGAN: “Melanie, could I ask you something… personal?” 😳 MELANIE: “Do you really think this is the right time?” HALLIGAN: “No, probably not. But who knows if I’ll ever get another chance to ask you.” 😔 MELANIE: “Well, what is it? I’m curious.” HALLIGAN: “If we ever get out of here alive…” 😳 MELANIE: “Yes?” HALLIGAN: “Would you… I mean, could you ever bring yourself to…” 🥺 MELANIE: “Go to Al’s Pizza Palace for a pizza with you? Yes, I think I’d like that!” ☺️ HALLIGAN: “Hey, how did you guess?! Do you know Al’s Pizza Palace?” 😮 MELANIE: “I’ve never been there, Brent, but when I went to Scotland Yard to look for you, I took a look at your office. I couldn’t miss the boxes.” 🙂 HALLIGAN: “Oh, I see… A bit untidy in there, isn’t it?” 😓 MELANIE: “You… could say that.” 😅 HALLIGAN: “Yes… I should try and tidy up in there sometime. But you’d come with me?” 😃 MELANIE: “I told you: yes!” 😊 HALLIGAN: “Right, it’s a deal! I’ll remind you about it.” 🤩 MELANIE: “Okay, Brent. I’m looking forward to it. But it might be an idea if we tried to get out of here alive first. What do you say?” 😏 HALLIGAN: “Of course. I’m sure we will.” 😌 Even after all that’s happened, I still find this kind of cute. After this, Halligan fucks up a bird’s nest outside. The blacksmith could make a duplicate key, but you’d need a mold of the original. The castle may be large, but I can think of a few places to check. SERSTAN: “Have you not been listening to me? Get out!” 😡 HALLIGAN: “I’d like to stay and watch you.” SERSTAN: “I understand. You wish to see for yourself what lies in store for you, is that it?” So, if you keep annoying him, the Big Bad Guy just lets you wander around. You find his key hidy-hole, so you can start the tedious process of copying it from here. Trust me, you’re not missing out. SERSTAN: “I said do not disturb me!” So, finally you have the key to the underground area. At first, it seems like relief, but this is the worst part of the game. It’s a maze. It’s a HUGE maze. Yeah, look at his face. Me too… Every time you go in a door, it seems to spit you out randomly. I thought the lanterns could be a hint, but no… Those runes on the wall must mean something, but you don’t get new ones until you know you’re progressing. And you WON’T know you’re progressing. Because you’ll go higher, or lower, or to the other side, and it seems at random. The farther you go, the more doorways open up. The chance of screwing up just gets higher and higher. HALLIGAN: “Oh, oh… This looks like it might prove a little difficult.” Use a guide, there’s no shame. Especially when you figure out that, to complete the maze, you need to go back the way you came 4 times, including doing it twice in a row at one point. So, walk backwards twice, but you’re making progress. A lot of people were calling adventure games dead in the early 2000’s for some reason… There’s no escape passage, but you do find a crystal ball that can show any moment in time. Adjusting it means mastering an ancient Celtic calendar, but you can just copy the one upstairs. Then mess with the smaller values. You automatically skip the maze on the way back, too, which is a nice surprise. At this point, I never expect mercy. So, if you do it correctly, you’ll see the ritual and the magical… ehm… staff? Telling good old Maglor creates a plan. If you steal the staff, there can be no ritual. Halligan will need to escape the castle first though. MAGLOR: “Anyone wishing to leave the monastery is blindfolded and guided by Serstan himself. Nobody can leave here without Serstan.” SERSTAN: (muffled) “Where are they?! Bring them to me!” MAGLOR: “Did you hear that?” HALLIGAN: “Hear what?” MAGLOR: “Out there! I think I heard Serstan’s voice! He’s looking for us!” HALLIGAN: “Damn it, that’s all we need! Lock the door, and then let’s get the hell out of here!” HALLIGAN: “We got no alternative but to jump! Now hold on!” SERSTASAR DROOT: “Lore of metal!” [sound of homing drooderball] HALLIGAN: “Do you hear that? What is it?” [explosion and Magl scream] HALLIGAN: “Maglor!!” [*splash*] HALLIGAN: “That was close…” What about Maglor? HALLIGAN: “Maglor! Are you hurt?” MAGLOR: (pained grunting) MAGLOR: “He hit me in the back… You… agh… are on your own now…” HALLIGAN: “Don’t talk nonsense! You won’t die! Tell me how I can help you!” MAGLOR: “You are wasting… your… time.” HALLIGAN: “Don’t act the hero! What do I have to do?” MAGLOR: “There’s mistletoe… here in the forest. You… could try that. It heals severe injuries. Go and look for it.” HALLIGAN: “Mistletoe? What does that look like?” MAGLOR: “You will recognize it…” HALLIGAN: “Okay, okay, don’t give up! I’ll be back in a second.” HALLIGAN: “There! That could be mistletoe.” HALLIGAN: “I've got the mistletoe, what do I have to do now? Maglor? Maglor!! Dammit!” He’s already gone… Learning empathy from his travels, Halligan gives him last rites. Oh, just kidding, he’s looting the body. The last section of the game is pure puzzles. There’s really nothing noteworthy about it. It’s basically the ending of “The Fifth Element”, just much dizzier. [*groon-groon-groon*] Not here. [*groon-groon-groon*] Let’s wrap this up. The sacred elements are assembled, and the staff is free. As always, things can’t be that easy. SERSTAN: “What are you doing?!” HALLIGAN: “Melanie!” Wow…
HALLIGAN: “Melanie!” MELANIE: “Brent, he’s going to kill me!” HALLIGAN: “Let her go! She hasn’t got anything to do with this. I came here on my own.” SERSTAN: “You have something that belongs to me. Give it to me, now!” MELANIE: “Brent, do what he says! He’s serious!” [*woosh*]
MELANIE: “Brent, do what he says! He’s serious!” [*woosh*]
HALLIGAN: “When he has the staff, he’ll kill us both.” HALLIGAN: “When he has the staff, he’ll kill us both.” HALLIGAN: “Listen, Serstan, I’ll give you the staff on one condition: you must swear that nothing will happen to either Melanie or me afterwards.” SERSTAN: “What? THAT is your condition?” HALLIGAN: “Swear on your honor.” SERSTAN: “It doesn’t mean anything to me whether you sad creatures live or die. If you really want to hear it, I swear it.” HALLIGAN: “On your honor!” SERSTAN: “On my honor.” HALLIGAN: “Okay, now let Melanie go.” SERSTAN: “Give me the staff!” HALLIGAN: “I’ll put it down here as soon as you let her go. Come here, Melanie!” He IS a great magician – his robes are white now! [electric crackling] SERSTAN: “Now our fates will be sealed! The ritual may begin! But first, I will take care of you two!” [ominous hum] SERSTAN: “You miserable fools! HA! Hah-ha! HAAAA-haa-haa!” 😈 MELANIE: (gasps)
HALLIGAN: “Ey…” Wow… Nah, they’re just back in the future. HALLIGAN: “My God, the ritual! We must get to the Stonehenge immediately!” HALLIGAN: “Sinclair is gonna complete the ritual! Come on, Melanie, we’ve got to try to stop him!” [laboured huffing] HALLIGAN: “Sinclair!!” 👺 SINCLAIR: “Mr. Halligan.” SINCLAIR: “Have you come to witness our finest hour? Very well, my friend, you are most welcome to come and watch.” HALLIGAN: “Dammit!” SINCLAIR: “The time has come. Let us begin.” [foreboding hum] None of the powerful items can stop the ritual. Not the amulet, not any druid artifacts – nothing. Nothing, except for broken hedge clippers. MELANIE: “AHH!!” MELANIE: “Brent… Ahh…” Does he… know what he did? HALLIGAN: “Serstan! The vow is broken!” SERSCLAIR: “No! Agh, no! No!! AGH, NOOO!! AGHH!!” Now the druids never existed or something. Honestly, Halligan is the best member of the Scotland Yard. No one else could have done this. He saved the day in his own psychotic way. HALLIGAN: “Melanie!” MELANIE: “Have.. ahh… Have they gone now?” HALLIGAN: “Yes. Yes, they’ve gone. Everything will be okay, just lie still.” 😧 MELANIE: “Brent…” MELANIE: “Brent, am I going to die?” HALLIGAN: “Nonsense! You’re going to be just fine! Just lie completely still. I’ll go and get help.” MELANIE: “Don’t… leave me… Brent… It’s cold here… I’m so cold…” HALLIGAN: “Melanie!” MELANIE: “Oghh…” There’s one last trick. Halligan has the mistletoe, and since the dinner party, he’s an ordained Druid. MELANIE: “Ohh…” HALLIGAN: “Melanie!” MELANIE: “Brent… What did you do?” HALLIGAN: “I just practiced a bit of magic, that’s all.” MELANIE: “Brent, I…” HALLIGAN: “Shh…” 🤫 😚 A happy ending! [ending theme starts playing] That’s catchy! ♪ One, two, three! ♪ ♪ Halligan’s life was pretty drab ♪ ♪ Racking up debt with the pizza tab ♪ ♪ Then his life got flipped around ♪ ♪ When they found the bones on the hallowed ground ♪ ♪ It’s the Mystery of the Droods, they all have an attitude (x2) ♪ ♪ Lowry was blessed with dashing looks ♪ ♪ Got all the girls due to all his books ♪ ♪ He couldn’t care less about the quest for killers ♪ ♪ Until Halligan came and swiped the scissors ♪ ♪ It’s the Mystery of the Droods, they all have an attitude (x2) ♪ ♪ The Droods are coming, the Droods are scary ♪ ♪ The Scotland Yard is getting wary ♪ ♪ But Halligan’s coming to solve the quarrel ♪ ♪ No matter how illegal, corrupt, or immoral ♪ ♪ The Mystery of the Droods, they all have an attitude ♪ ♪ It’s the Mystery of the Droods, they all have an attitude ♪ ♪ It’s the Mystery of the Droods, a mystery for me and you ♪ ♪ It’s the Mystery of the Droods, a mystery for me and you, whoah-wa-hu ♪ The first time playing it, I felt like I was being poisoned, but… I liked it a lot! The writing gives so much attention to little details that stack up. There are gaping plot holes at the same time, but it doesn’t seem to matter. There is a ton of subtle, dry humor throughout the entire game. Once again, this is abridged. There are so many strange things that just couldn’t make the cut. If you really wanna play it, it will be less than a dollar in the pinned comment for a few days. With some cleaning up, I do think it could be an adventure game classic. Everything about it fascinates me, but there’s some tedium that could be cut down. Who knows, maybe if enough stupid demand is made, they’ll do something with the franchise. Probably not, but it’s fun to think. Anyways, have a happy Halloween and stay safe out there. Hopefully, now, when you see this face, you’ll think of so much more. I might go lie down. The more I think about it, there is a lot of parts I could be okay with forgetting. [the ending song that I neglected putting down the second time finishes playing] Don’t wake the others yet… [hissing of steam and disgruntled snarls]
I was a little disappointed earlier this month when he didn't do his usual 3 or 4 games for Halloween. But this video more than makes up for it. It's long, meaty, and pretty great.
Good job Mandalore.
Even if Mandalore weren't as brilliant as he is, that entire video would have been worth it just for the ending song + music video. Incredible.
To this day I still don't understand how did the final scene happened.
I thought that:
Serstan's vow was about him not harming Halligan and Turner. If it covers all possible injuries on them then surely the vow would have been triggered already at any point of time Halligan or Turner got hurt in their lives.
Why did Serstan care about his honour anyway?
How the fuck did breaking this vow cause Sinclair to do what he did?
The ending was the true Mystery of the Druids to me. It made no sense.
For me, that angry screaming face is the face of the Wal-Mart Electronics section. The mascot to end them all. The deity of the smell of freshly opened pc games sold only in jewel cases.
I cannot look at a bargain bin to this day without imagining a druid screaming into my face.
The jokes just land so perfectly with the delivery. "You'll find two items in the castle, jack and shit"
Man, I'm so excited to watch this. My girlfriend and I watched his Dead Space videos again and they're just so well done. He's so good at articulating what makes something special. One of the best gaming content creators around.
Wait does he play older games and makes videos of it like Accursed Farms? Cool.
Is that the Goosebumps TV show theme in the intro ?
if anyone wants to see a great playthrough of this..... unique game they gotta check out this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuH3AdcVwfk