A Uniquely Bad Crowd | Troy Bond Stand Up

I didn't know what to do I just started improvising I was like dude can you please shut the [ __ ] up this feels like a homeless shelter show I'm not gonna lie this feels Justice Knoxville and I know there's some dirty needles in here you got it okay that was a weird thing to clap for dog you were clapping for you you were trying to get a clap going and it didn't work at all the pigeons well what is your problem were you touched too much and not enough I don't know what the [ __ ] your problem is but you just keep shouting up I'm giving you the attention you want now your parents should have left you in the forest they found you and you thin lift hat be quiet what do you want what did you say no to was that Homeless crackhead talking to pigeons a friend of yours and we have a bird that way you won't stop chirping will you focus on me look nobody's on your side here I am I want to entertain you you were just a raging pitch and you won't stop talking you got a little smile on that one you got a little kid shape don't you [ __ ] I like it this is fun dude I can't even understand what you're saying that's what's bothering me can you turn on the subtitles or talk quieter please just shut the [ __ ] up I don't even know which one he was talking because it's dark but like I'm I'm I'm I'm upset okay well you are a horrible friend sir and a bad snitch and you would never make it in Nazi Germany you [ __ ] he just said that guy that [ __ ] learned [Music] I'm catching like every fourth word and so is everybody else are you Irish yes yeah that'll do it see they're not even drunk this is just normal Irish people the [ __ ] lives are here is going to be 1917. Sheamus we're gonna [ __ ] I'm gonna hit my wife I'm gonna [ __ ] do it last I'm gonna [ __ ] decorate the [ __ ] stupid bird did someone just have an orgasm this is not Irish at all you sounded like an orphan from the 20s oh my God extra extreme I'm coming right now boys yeah it's coming in hot and it's coming past yeah see semen in the pants okay that was the gayest noise I've ever heard in my whole life [Applause] are you gay or Irish you could be one of the other the church is very clear about this it's okay it's okay you don't have to be sure yet it makes a lot of sense why you're being so disruptive now he's like I don't know if I want to suck a [ __ ] or love the Lord that's the longer he goes with me the less I have to think about it they're after me lucky Charmed boys they're gonna [ __ ] take them like my uncle took my innocence on the seventh communion he took me into the stall I thought I was going to see the lord of the light and all I saw was his [ __ ] in my mouth I called it a Sinead O'Connor Nothing Compares to the trauma that day boys all right I didn't hear all that part wait what did you say games it's not nice okay all right listen nobody's on your side here all right I'm trying to help the show move along I'm trying to help the people who aren't raging Pricks enjoy a good time good they're making me homophobic I'm not gonna lie I'm filming very homophobic right now I'm gonna vote for Mike Pence for president in 2024. I'm honestly gonna see if I can do it right now because I like the whole immigration don't let people from out of the country into the country Park I really like that right now okay I'm gonna go back to you what is your problem [Music] I don't know if you're pulling me or pulling him I think they were bullying you boss all right yes it's okay listen listen everyone has a different disability it's not a disability it's just a different ability

Channel: Troy Bond

Views: 195,013

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Id: H8qZ6N3liSg

Length: 4min 34sec (274 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 17 2023