7 Signs the Private Army You’ve Joined Works for the Bad Guys

taking a job at a private army might sound like a good idea high-tech equipment a sense of camaraderie and hey maybe they'll let you be the guy with the flamethrower backpack that can only end well right but more often than not what seems like a pretty sweet gig can end up with you in the employ of an evil mercenary squad working to nefarious ends for a shadowy client and very probably dooming the world in the process and that's only if you can avoid getting your butt whooped by some handsome protagonist blasting through your barracks here are the signs that the private army you've joined just might be working for the baddies your first day of work usually consists of three things meeting your coworkers learning where the lose are and getting your uniform but there are some you'd think twice about putting on when handed them such as a Krueger security or kasich uniforms in Mirror's Edge catalyst this Private Security Division of Kruger holding decided that the best way to address their security forces was by putting them in dystopian future aesthetic white covering their faces and basically making them look like scary space Androids to be fair I could have done with a mask like that when I worked in retail for avoiding eye contact with customers but surely there's a more humanizing alternative transparent face plates would make it easier for you to see make it easier for you to be seen and surely make it easier to figure out who actually turned up for work that day plus it would make it a lot harder for some runner to do this to you yeah faith I'd like to see you try and do that when you can see the fear in their eyes why are you bosses are easiest to deal with when they behave predictably not suddenly changing deadlines for instance or canceling meetings or jumping headfirst out of a helicopter and if your boss is the kind of swivel-eyed eccentric that does the latter well friend this is a big old clue that the private army you're working for is one of the evil ones one like stable international for instance the private mercenary force run by terrifying acrobat princess silver sable and hired by new york mayor norman osborn to keep the city safe as a sable employee you might have valid concerns about some of those peacekeeping methods maybe about firing missiles into public bits of manhattan america or imprisoning civilians in high-tech ages both of which are wildly unethical and perhaps more pertinently liable to get you kicked hard in the spine by spider-man but good luck raising those concerns with the boss because like all evil videogame army chief she is a hundred percent more interested in jumping out of helicopters than whatever you have to say can't keep doing this your knees silver sable another red flag for any guns for hire wondering if they've strayed onto team evil is if your leader seems increasingly unfertile out the task you are all hired to complete and more interested in deranged personal vendettas like for instance killing spider-man you think you save people but you just make it worse this is your fault my fault he was under your protection you really need two of those stop we need to brief mr. Osborn now with orders from the top to kill spider-man on sight it's no surprise that what is ostensibly a peacekeeping mission ones up with you and your heavily-armored pals taking a whole lot of superheroes strong punches to the face not that the boss is keeping track she's far too busy furiously jumping out of helicopters or in this case of the hover plane of some kind whatever it is I bet it can land which is the proper point to disembark you hope hatred I Sunday replace the pain but it never goes away [Music] inside wouldn't you agree branding is really important as I learned from my failed pizza parlor nothing but poison what it was an acronym pepperoni olives Italian sausage you know what it doesn't matter now but it's worth considering how your organization presents itself to the world for instance if it's named after Cerberus the mythical hell dog that stops the dead from leaving the underworld it might be assigned to your organization has some diabolical leanings and if your boss is called the illusive man well that's probably a clue he's not what you'd call a straight shooter delusive myth I thought we'd be meeting face to face also the elusive man not a standard name for a manager is always saying Keith is more normal or Kristen furthermore members of the black hand mercenary army from the gist course series should have clocked that they're the bad guys when they saw their logo was a skull and there's really no excuse for those in the employ of skull face from the Metal Gear games skull face they're a pretty big clue you're not on the side of the goodies even if the actual logo of his xof forces which is just a flipped version of the Fox team's branding isn't so much bad as just lazy come on skull face you can't just take your main rivals name and reverse it that's why Pepsi isn't called a locker [ __ ] well it's one of the reasons [Applause] set the charges there are different schools of thought in archeology should you leave ruins and preserve them where they are all should you dig them all up and put them in a museum whichever school of thought they will all agree on one thing don't be like Trinity in the Tomb Raider series and use fast quantities of dynamite it's as if a million archaeology professors are all cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced because there's no talking in the library see private military organization Trinity also known as the order of Trinity is a religious cabal who seek to restore humanity to some kind of biblical paradise by seeking out supernatural relics as you do in order to get to these mystical MacGuffins they often have to explore ancient tombs to uncover them in their rush to get to their goal however partly out of a weird self-righteousness and partly because they always have Lara Croft snapping at their heels they don't stop to take the time to carefully excavate instead they order their soldiers to blast bash and hack their way through so if you're in beautiful ancient ruins and instead of a little brush you're handed a stick of dynamite you've probably not joined the good guys I think it's a finish drawing the crenellations you go where the money leaves you that's come it gets colder I'm gonna take a leak while you educate our young recruit you perhaps you're noticing a lot of employee turnover in the old mercenary job never the same faces at the office Christmas party maybe this is the time to ask yourself is it because a roguish good-looking scoundrel is single-handedly killing all your colleagues if their cheekbones are Nathan Drake level or higher you might be the baddie sorry we suspect if the members of shoreline the Army for hire encountered in uncharted four had run this simple equation many of them would have quit before the point where Nathan Drake could snap their evildoing necks regardless of how well they were being paid to help uncover the lost pirate city of Liberty Leah because one of the clearest signs that you're sailing foul of the moral compass is when a handsome underdog often one with no military experience an armed only with a particularly sharp haircut is able to cut through your ranks like butter time and time again yeah when you're the baddie in a game featuring Nathan Drake who has more confirmed murders to his name than any serial killer in history it might be time to take a good long hard look at yourself heads up my voice it's that time again sure is better than coffee and a slap in the face I am so ready delivery hell yeah Oh one way of telling how good an employer is is to look at their health benefits if they offer free health checks or free dental then that's good and if they forcibly pump you full of hallucinogenic drugs well well that's bad which is how you should know something's up with the Mantell corporation a world-dominating business with its own private army in whose employee you find yourself in 2008 Hays Mantell equipped their troops with puffy suits that keep their blood streams topped up with a drug called nectar which is a little on the nose bearing in mind the whole squadron already looks like a gang of evil bees you got me black you're Roy and you got wood got wood corporal wood sir I've heard all the jokes this reality-warping super drug has many benefits for instance soldiers buzzed on nectar can move faster and aim further making the utterly lethal in the battlefield it also transforms an otherwise grim combat zone into a colorful blissed-out paradise where enemies appear as glittering points of light and bodies fade from view once slain to spare you from looking at anything sad like a dead body but incredibly there are downsides to pumping soldiers full of nectar I mean asides making the entire war feel like one awful unending stag weekend a toast to freeing some hearts and minds to freeing this country that the Lord forgot about while he's away let's go to his house keeping the hearts and minds oh yeah please don't be on my train please don't be on my train Arthur Murray indeed the list of potentially harmful side effects would make a TV commercial for Nexo run to half an hour just in disclaimers for instance overdosing on the stuff can render a trooper incapable of telling friend from foe and leave them unable to stop firing their weapon yikes the fact that the Mantell corporation considers this an acceptable side effect tells you everything you need to know about its moral alignment and that's even before you've got a nectar free glimpse of the atrocities your pals carry out while high as kites and this is why air support rule boo yeah yep imagine being here when the Fonz came down I bet they in their pants yeah right before them in their pants got blown to pieces man just proves there's never a reason to rely on addictive substances in the workplace sorry place sorry James let's go again with a [ __ ] is my latte come on and common in the brief but devastating conflict between artificial security you know you're a goodie when you're named after the bravest of birds the hawk and to start with in tom clancy's hawx everything is good but upon the closure of your US military team you end up at private military army artemus working in their airborne operations squad Reaper flight Reaper flight sounds a bit suspect did they not hear all the stuff we said about skull face aside from the squad name Artemus initially seems like a pretty good company to work for they only work to defend their clients from attack and are in compliance with the REC UVic accords Charter meaning that they cannot initialize conflict themselves but instead must be contracted by a sovereign state I mean that's just off the top of my head however after the US military intervenes in one of their missions and Artemis sees its profits fall it decides to launch a sneak attack on the US Artemus aid to the US in one mission only to switch sides faster than the little ball in Trinidad offers that's probably the point at which you would go back to the US military and fight for them just as Reaper flight did but weirdly a lot of their other staff did not make the change not even when CEO Adrian de Winter sent a threatening bomb filled ultimatum to the President of the United States mr. president we offered you the chance to put an end to this crisis but you refused to listen now I'm afraid I must insist you know by now that we have acquired several tactical nuclear weapons I will give you 24 hours to surrender unconditionally or a major US city will be destroyed yeah that's usually not a good sign and it's probably why at the end of the game after a lot of back and forth hawks squadron destroy Artemis's base with de winter in it citadel confirms that the winter's hideout has been destroyed no survivors detected the best of the winter Artemis were all about chasing profits but good luck chasing your redundancy pay so those are the signs of the evil videogame army you've joined is indeed one of the evil ones sorry about that can you think of any other little telltale signs that you're on the side of the baddies if so let us know in the comments and if you enjoyed this then why not check out one of these other videos this one up here it's all about prisons that held you for about five minutes super easy to escape and this is down here from our sister channel outside Xbox it's all about little details and games that are super satisfying and if you enjoyed this then why not subscribe okay we out James great Marte

Channel: Outside Xtra

Views: 945,294

Keywords: Ellen Rose, Luke Westaway, Outside Xtra, are we the baddies, kruger, KrugerSec, KSec, silver sable, sable, sable international, mirror's edge catalyst, spider-man, spider-man ps4, Cerberus, The Illusive Man, Black Hand, Just Cause 4, Trinity, Tomb Raider, shoreline, Uncharted, uncharted shoreline, Haze, h.a.z.e., nectar, hawx, tom clancy's hawx, h.a.w.x., andy farrant, outsidexbox, outside xbox, list, funny

Id: CEkQa2Dqyew

Length: 15min 25sec (925 seconds)

Published: Tue Apr 16 2019