-All right. We're checking out the only game
where the best next-door neighbor is the one that kills you the fastest. It's The Man From the Window. It's time
for another game that's supposed to be a-- that's supposed to be a horror game, but it does not totally understand
my inability to experience fear
like a normal human being. Is this a pizza delivery person,
or is this like my mom? I'm not gonna lie,
my mom looks a lot like a mobile turnip. Also, I think my mom is a rabbit. Do you have to walk completely
around my entire house judging my decor set up before
delivering my pizza? Mama Rabbit. How come Mama Rabbit
has like an Instagram photo for her like profile shot? Better try to get some sleep. You're not going to sleep
on like my chair, are you? Because that's what I use to watch anime. Is--
what is this? Is this me or? I don't know if she's just very big
or if I'm just really malnourished. Junior, what on earth
are you doing up so late? Well, hopefully, dying,
if the game works out correctly. You know you have school tomorrow,
But mama. You and I both know school
is totally useless. The Man from the book is gonna get me. Now we're getting somewhere. Wait a second, man from the book. Are you telling me that I'm going
to be murdered by education? See this storybook here, mom. Remember when you bought that for me
because you said you didn't want me to sleep like a normal child anymore? Remember when you were like,
'my son hasn't experienced enough trauma in his life. So let me get him this book with Gru,
the Minions guy, staring creepily from the bottom part
of the cover.' Give it here. That's my book.
Yep. All right. I guess you could just rip it
from my clutches. The Man from the window
is quite the odd fellow. I like how they couldn't even be bothered
to make the text like fit on the page. The text is like, I do what I want. With big beady eyes and sunken nose,
he just wants to say hello. He sounds like a fantastic neighbor.
Let's see. He searches for only one thing. A new friend is all he wants. He's very lonely. If you hear him tap-tap-tapping
on the window, he's found a new friend to play, then you have five minutes
before he takes you away. The Man is very bold. He will check inside the place,
which is cold. Do I have to lock myself
in the refrigerator? If I don't--
if like-- like if I can't open
the refrigerator back up from the inside, won't I just die? You're too young to be reading this. It'll scare
your little mind half to death. Mama Rabbit, I don't think you understand
how much the educational system has failed me. I don't understand what fear is. Oh. Well, guess we're both gonna die, mom. Okay, mom, he's starting
to like break through the window. Can you like go get your gun? Dear Lord, this ain't good. So, um, is it-- Oh, oh, oh, it's me. Uh, hello. All right, kid. I got two questions. Why don't we have any tables?
What are you wearing? Junior, follow me. Stay here. Here, let's split up. That always works
in all these different horror movies. Can I just go back to sleep on the couch? Oh, I could push it in front of the door. Yeah, absolutely. Two minutes well worth my time.
There you go. Now we're fine,
unless it comes through the window. Anyway, you hungry? I thought it was pizza. I guess it's donuts. Eat the donuts. Mya-mya-mya-mya-mya-mya-myam .
Priorities, baby. All right.
Grab the keys. I can grab this fork. I could probably fit myself
under there and hide. Mama Rabbit, I don't think that's true. There ain't no way I'm fitting in there
to hide, but junior probably could. Inside a microwave. Come here.
You're gonna fo- you're gonna follow me.
All right. I gotta-
I gotta- I got--
The-- Literally,
the awesomest place for you to hide. It was exactly 2:00 AM
when The Man approached the front door. It was left unlocked,
but he was unable to open it. Haha. Get wrecked. Oh, it took him a minute
to break through the door. That's actually not that good. The Man has found his new friend. Oh. You took- you took my child and not me?
Well, it doesn't-- I don't--
that's fine. All right.
Attempt number two to keep my son alive. All right, follow me. You're going inside the microwave. No joke.
All right. Get in there. It might be a little cold,
but you need to hide inside the fridge for a bit,
and don't come out until I say so. And if you
don't hear me tell you to come out, well-- I'm scared. Shut up and get in there. [?] All right.
Now that that's all set up. Let's see how the rest
of the house is decorated. All right.
We have a wash basin in here. Hide in the wash tub. Nah, we don't need-
we don't need to hide. There's no big deal.
Uh, we got the sink over here. How about you?
What's in here. Oh, it's a bedroom. Where does my son actually sleep? She goes, I can prop the chair up
at the door, but it's not very sturdy. I know from personal experience. Yeah.
Why not? Go ahead.
All right. I'm going inside the tub. Hopefully, this works. All right.
The Man approaches the front door. He's unable to open it. An unsturdy little chair had been used
to bar the door. It takes him 30 seconds. You just broke my chair. I've only got one left.
So now it's between me and my son. All right.
So The Man goes in. Where's he gonna look? Are you serious? You're gonna look inside of a microwave,
the very first place you would think of for a child to be? Are you kidding me right now? Sorry, buddy. I'm I'm running outta places
to put your kid there follow me. All right. Step number two. Apparently, this guy's a psychopath
because the very first place he thought of to put a child was the refrigerator.
So, uh, there. Go, go under there-there. Hide under the sink. All right, there we go.
We're gonna close the door. I'm gonna get inside the tub. Bam, door was unlocked,
so he walked straight in. Yeah, come on in. Why not? There's donuts to the left
if you want some, by the way. You're not gonna find a child inside
of the microwave for like the first time in my parental life. Oh, he's just walking straight past it.
Didn't he? Hey, don't see me, do you? Oh, come on. You know, technically,
he's still hidden because the bar is in the way. All right, kid, I'm getting
to the point where I'm literally just gonna throw you out the window
to the guy, because like hiding you is pointless. Okay. All right.
Get under the table. Doesn't really look
like the best hiding spot, but it'll have to do. I'm taking the keys. I'm gonna open this box of donuts. Maybe that'll lure him over there. All right,
now I'm going into the tub because, again, I think it's the only place
I could legitimately hide. All right, The Man goes in. You like calories? Yeah. Right on the left over there. Yum, yum, yum. Spotted a box of donuts, see that? Totally worked. Got him.
Took a minute to eat the all. Now he has diabetes. No joke, though, if you finish
an entire box of donuts in 60 seconds, that's incredible. The time is now 2:01. Oh, my son lasted for one minute. One full minute.
Okay. Where we go?
Where are we heading to? Ah, there's nothing inside of here though. Yeah, what are you gonna do about that? Looked under the bed,
no child there, but he found nothing. Actually, while you're under there,
could you like vacuum like all the way to the back of the bed? Because I know you got
like really long spiny arms, or don't, that's fine too. Wow, I am like not hitting it all. Looked under the sink. Also is it just me or are
those not like the biggest roles of industrial-sized toilet paper
that have ever been seen ever? Also, I just noticed my son didn't put
the toilet seat down. I'm gonna slap him. All right.
Found nothing under there. My son has now lasted
for two full minutes. Yeah.
Okay. What's next?
What we got? What you got for me? Oh, you're gonna look
under the table, huh? It's alright, kid. Well, suck. All right, I got a new plan. Here's what we're gonna do. You follow me. I never thought it would take me
so much effort to keep a child alive. Sounds weird. All right, open the donuts, grab
the keys, push this in front of the door. All right, little beetus, follow me. All right.
Go under the bed. I'm gonna go in here. Never mind,
I'm actually too big to pass the door. Okay, now I'm gonna go in here. I wonder if I could put my son
inside the toilet. Okay, here we go. He has to break down the door,
full minute. He gets inside. Now he has to contract diabetes,
another full minute. Hey, yeah, here we go. Also, I just noticed
there was two donuts missing. Did I like eat those simply
on the way home to feed my child? All right, it's 2:02.
Oh, my son's dead. All right, kid.
Get inside the refrigerator. I swear to God I'm gonna make this work. I don't care what it takes. God, saving a child is like playing
a game of frigging Tetris. I never thought there was
that much effort that went into it. All right, now, donuts gone. Could you at least throw
the box out when you're done? Nope. All right, or don't. Now is he's gonna go look under the bed,
but it's not gonna matter cause the kid's not there. So he always follows the same pattern,
which means it's really bad for me. But because my memory sucks. I hate my life. After getting my son murdered
in literally every possible way, I have finally figured out
how to keep this kid alive. Now actually I shouldn't say
I figured it out. The only reason I think this is going
to work is because it's the last way. Like he has died
every other single possible way that there could be.
Open the donuts. Put the thing over there,
leave the keys on the table. Bring the kid into this room,
get under the bed, close the door, open this door, into the tub. I swear to God at this point,
if you find my child, you could keep him. All you have to do
is make sure that The Man screws around for five minutes straight. The-the couch has actually been
more useful than me as a parent at this point. The couch bought an entire minute
and the donuts are gonna buy another minute. All right, it's 2:02. We're like 50% of the way there almost. Now, as long as he doesn't look
in the tub, even though I'm like very obviously
in the tub, everything should be just fine. There we go. I love how he's just like, yeah,
I'm not gonna systematically check things. I'll just keep going this way. All right, looks under the refrigerator. 2:03, two minutes left to survive. Oh, apparently, he does not do
the same thing twice. Okay, I finally figured out
how to make this broken glass sandwich to work.
So I have to read this real quick. Okay, he's gonna check the microwave,
he's gonna check the-the table, then he's gonna check underneath the sink. Okay, so the tub. Okay, so it's the mirror and the tub.
Got it. This is totally working. We're actually gonna survive. All right.
First things first, grab the keys. Bam. Right there. Second, put open this box
of donuts filled with arsenic. I guess if it was filled with arsenic,
I wouldn't have to go through all this. Lock the front door,
move the couch in front of it, and don't get stuck in it
because you have no idea how many times my gigantic character
has gotten stuck inside of the couch when I pushed it up against the door. Here, little junior,
the only thing you're good at is dying. Follow me. All right, we're moving along. Lock this, open this door. Come here, get inside.
Hurry up. Move your stubby little legs
and get under the sink. I have watched you get abducted
like a thousand times. I'm scared. Do you wanna be scared
or do you wanna be dead? Get in there. Okay. Now, lock this. Boom. I get in here and this
is totally gonna work. Here we go. For the first time ever,
both me and my son are going to survive. I love that the whole-- that like the MVP
of this entire scenario is the door. The door literally saved my child
more than my entire parental abilities. So it took a minute and a half
to break through the door and the lock. It really annoys me, though,
because he's going through my house and he's just destroys
everything like a jerk. I can't even afford tables
to put my lamps on, and you have to come in,
you have to eat all my donuts. By the way, you have no idea
how much I wanted the last place for me to live to be underneath that table so
I could pick up a fork and just stab him in the groin. So again, an entire box of donuts
in one minute, that's gotta be some kind of professional record.
All right, now he's gonna go in here. He's gonna open the door, and by open,
I mean, he's going to punch it to death until the-the lock falls off 'cause we can't have nice things
in this house. All right, now he is gonna check
underneath the bed. Nothing there. It kind of annoys me that this whole time,
like the winning thing in this game was literacy. Like I would--
I never would've guessed. All right, gonna look inside
of the refrigerator, what do you know? Often he finds children in there,
but not today. Okay, so now it's gonna be 2:04
and now he's gonna go ahead and he is gonna check the table. Yes. Oh, my God. I've never felt so satisfied
in just making a man waste five minutes of his life. That's really all that I've done. And now, because he has to sit there
and break the last lock I have in the house, he can't do it. His time was up and he knew it,
so as quickly as he arrived, The Man From the Window left. He didn't leave from the window,
he just ran out the front door. You're a liar. And now the mother and son
can both get diabetes together. Finally. Well, I found out my most powerful weapon
is knowledge and it makes my head hurt. Anyway, folks, [?] this episode
of The Man From the Window. Till the next time,
stay foxy, and much love.
