What's A Students Most Sarcastic Remark? (Teacher Stories r/AskReddit)

teachers what was the best smart belt response from a student you have heard back when I taught first grade we were doing a writing assignment about Thanksgiving the kids had to draw a picture of their family celebrating Thanksgiving and then write about it one little girl drew the table and chairs and that was all I knew she just didn't feel like doing the work so I tried to prompt her I asked where the food and her family were and she snapped right back with their washing the dishes had to give her credit for coming up with a logical argument from not doing the work not a teacher but witnessed as a student there was literally 30 seconds left of class and my buddy starts to pack up the teacher didn't seem to mind but when the bell rang and buddy got up to leave the teacher said the classic line the Bell doesn't dismiss you I do and Buddy just continues to leave gets in the doorway of the class and says if it decides when I come it decides when I leave and just leaves the class my grandson who lives with my wife and I was sent to office one day for breaking dress code no belt the principal asked why he didn't wear it to which he replied my cokehead mother stole it and I didn't have time to get another principal got super mad and called us to tell us what happened and what he had said I confirmed his story well his coke addicts mother came to visit last night and we didn't realize it was gone until this morning I could audibly hear him gasp over the phone and immediately started apologizing and every time I see him now he mentions it and apologizes I had a teacher tell a classmate no drinks in class he got up from his seat picked up the teachers drink and deposited in the garbage with his drink she sent him to the office I was doing poorly in a middle school class on account of my mother having terminal brain cancer this one teacher would constantly get on my case even though he knew about the situation I wasn't a bad student I was just severely distracted from the situation at home and couldn't always focus I missed two days off school due to her worsening condition the day before she died he left a voicemail at my house explaining my five missing homework assignments but no one really cared I didn't go to school for a week after her death and when I returned I said to him well now that she's dead I can finally finish those assignments right I think he finally understood the principal gave him a good chewing out too this was while working with nine-year-olds we're doing number problems and her kid is having trouble with a son the son is you have 40 sweets you give half your sweets to your friend how many sweets do you have now I grabbed 40 counters and say to the kid here are 40 sweets if you give me half how many will you have left kid turns to me and utterly deadpan says I can't give you the sweets you aren't my friend tangentially related smartass response from teacher on behalf of the student had a student that came back a couple of weeks out of class counselor let the teachers know that his father had passed and he was having a rough time I pulled him aside after class one day told him not to worry about any of the work he missed focus on getting caught up in your other classes I'll make things work out here I was his tenth grade English teacher we had already taken the end-of-year exam as far as the state was concerned he was done and that was good enough for me kid with straight A's until his dad passed Cup - a few weeks later I'm called into the counselor's office for a meeting with the students other teachers I double-check and he's been doing great in class and work I've assigned has been turned in on time even though I told him he didn't have to so I have no idea what's going on become to find out his other teachers went as lenient on the make up work as I was he had gotten behind in all his other classes and had stayed behind now he was in danger of failing everything but my class he'd have to repeat the year safe for English a counselor asks me what I did to help the student oh well I told him not to worry about anything he missed and that as far as I was concerned he was already caught up and he could do his best in class going forward one of the other teachers balked I don't see why we needed mr. hexed dragons input he just let the kid skip out on work that's not helpful I replied the kid's dad just freaking died you really think the last six weeks worth of history matters to him in the the counselor smiled and pointed at me I invited mr. hex Dragan because I knew he would say some things I'm not allowed to say a fellow student in my class shouted that it was frickin freezing in the classroom the teacher naturally told him not to use the f-word so the kid replied it's frickin cold in here had my class of working class kids at an art gallery as we waited for our tour to begin we played on the small playground near the door a prep school kid in a uniform approach two of my boys and said I bet I'm smarter than you are I watched to make sure no blood was drawn my students can hold their own pretty much anywhere and they don't accept insults casually but they were cool no you're not are you in grade two the boy said he wasn't one of my boys said so then we're all grade two so we are all grade two smart he went back to climbing the monkey bars but the prep school kid continued I know I'm smarter let's do some math and I'll prove it the toughest kid in my room looked this guy square in the eye and said well I'm smart enough not to do math when I'm having fun on a playground my history teacher would spend half the class making jokes directed at the students one student in particular always took the jokes on the chin and never really made any comebacks eventually the teacher called him out and jokingly lectured him about standing up for himself but he ended his rant with you've gotta be a man you've gotta be like me the student replied with well which one do you want me to be a man or do you want me to be like you in HS our functions and relations teacher would always start to say something forget it and say I lost my train of thought well one day a buddy of mine replies it's okay sir there were no important passengers on boat why are you all talking because you're not second grade kid was sent out of the room this is in regards to the rule don't talk when the teachers talking I'm not a teacher but I had a friend in school who was always pretty dramatic she actually did have eyebrow so we're in this [ __ ] teacher's class and she keeps asking to use the bathroom the teacher says No friends like I have I blow and the teacher is like tell me what those initials mean and I will let you go so she screams i T means I have to crap and takes off out of the room student a says to student B dude shut the Frick up staff says student a we don't talk that way in the future find a more appropriate way of expressing yourself student a says to staff oh sorry then turns to student B and says dude would you please shut the Frick up well this one was during coaching classes for entrance exams the maths teacher reduced a given problem to a simpler form and challenged the student so this expression doesn't fit any of the given standard forms for us to find the particular integral so what do you propose we do a kid from the back shouted the next question not a teacher but witnesses student we had a substitute who was leafing through the yearbook and got to the senior superlatives our school mascot was the Eagles she started reading some Athena loud and said oh that's nice Sarah most school spirited a student answered back yeah because she's always spread eagle the substitute couldn't keep from laughing as much as she tried not to let me point out that I'm female since people will assume I'm a guy I taught in an inner-city school we were talking about prime numbers so I would have kids give me a number and we'd work out if the number was a prime number on the board one kid wasn't paying attention so me being a young teacher I thought I'd catch him off guard and call on him it went something along the lines of mark do you have a number hard I need your number she'd played cool girl we can talk after class the whole room lost their crap and I turned red from embarrassment they then laughed at how red they got in a high school physics class we were learning about friction and what varies how strong it is so the teacher asks so as an engineer what would be some of the hard parts of designing say racing tires some kid in the back says getting out of bed in the morning Spanish class in high school two guys who grew up in spanish-speaking families were goofing off at the back of class one guy says that he could stand the weight of another person standing on his stomach and the other guy who was probably just shy of 200 pounds doesn't believe him so the first guy gets on the ground in the back of class and the other guy gets up and stands on his stomach the teacher sees this and immediately yelled at the guy on the ground to get back into his seat without missing a beat he says I can't he's standing on me the other guy doesn't move because he wasn't yelled at meanwhile the teacher continues to be upset that the guy on the ground isn't listening to her I witness a rather sad one in my chemistry class sophomore year one of my friends with going through some family issues and his dad just left for a year or so the kid was acting up in class and the teacher was like do you want me to call your dad and he was like if he picks up tell him to come home soon a kid in my math class would sleep on his desk one day the teacher called on him to answer a problem on the chalkboard he woke up solved the problem on the board with zero difficulty and then just went back to sleep the teacher repeated the same thing a few times with similar results and then just let him sleep the rest of the year a kid mocked me when I said don't do that I started to yell at him and he said no man that's a song he then spontaneously came up with a rap song called don't do that and his friend started making beads I was no longer mad my friend Brian was in his homeroom class back in high school the topic of abortion came up as everyone was asking each other if why they're either against or pro-abortion we're in Texas so you can assume the ideas and opinions of the majority of the class so my friend is a very intelligent and quiet fellow minding his own business in a corner of the room the class turns to him to get his opinion on the matter someone Brian you've been quiet over there so what about you are you pro-abortion Brian well I wouldn't say I'm Pro but I'm pretty good with a coat hanger jaws drop the room is silent as everyone is read during what just happened glad I made it to school that day just yesterday actually one of my classes is fun in that we give each other hard times but all in good fun and accomplish a lot a girl stops giggling uncontrollably for no reason and she's a bit of an airhead so I asked her if she saw something shiny and if that entertained her another boy jumps in and says yeah mister your head I'm going bald I wanted to pretend to be mad but it was just tootling funny I have a smartass response from a teacher story to share in 8th grade science class we were learning about the planets in the usual class clown let's call him kay was making the usual immature jokes about Uranus our teacher mr. P who was a younger pretty chill guy wasn't having it so mr. P tells Kay to go outside when Kay asks which door he should use to leave mr. P first says it doesn't matter it quickly comes back with an answer and says you know what why don't you go out the back door since you like Uranus so much the whole class went crazy definitely one of the best teacher responses to dumb student comments that I've witnessed I went to a Catholic school very strict lots of beatings to friends and I had been taught by one of the more violent teachers mr. Murphy off the school grounds climbing in the neighboring estates trees after school detention we all lined up in his office where he is screaming it is for our bad behavior letting the school down etc we expecting a beating or 500 word essay if we are lucky or perhaps he'll just punch as a bit he turns to my friend Dave and shouts do you climb in your neighbors trees at home Dave replies head down and sounding remorseful no sir why not they haven't got any so my other friend literally ended up crying with laughter on the floor I was shaking with laughter and Dave just stood their head down emotionless mr. Murphy stood there momentarily lost for words before shouting at us to get out and that was it the funny thing was Dave never understood why it was so funny this is sort of a flip from the question but there was this awesome history teacher I had freshman year of high school who was just always in an amazing mood we'll call him mr. Smith one day everyone is sitting in class waiting for the tardy bell to ring when a kid sneaks a condom onto the door handle the bell rings and mr. Smith walks into the room grabs the handle to close the door and pulls the condom off for it looks at the condom helmet for a split second and stuffs it into his pocket while saying thanks I'll need this later in high school one of my teachers was having a disagreement with a student I can't remember what it was about but finally the teacher asked him if she wanted her to call his mother the student replies do it in my memory will agree with me too the teacher then asks him to leave her class he goes you know what I'm gonna call my mom for you he then whips out his cell phone and calls his mom on speaker hey MA this teacher want to talk to you the whole class just lost it my buddies and I used to like to play Ultimate Frisbee on the football field during lunch we were told not to organized sports were supposed to be that organized they didn't want kids getting hurt without supervision anyway one day we said screw it and decided to do it anyway so they turned the sprinklers on us but didn't stop us we kept playing and finally they sent a security guard out to get us detention for the rest of the day in the cold cafeteria soaked and cold so we started chattering and talking but it's hard to stay quiet when you're shivering anyway the coach watching over detention told everyone to shut up you will sound like a bunch of Canaries in a cage everyone got silent then one person started it and it slowly grew cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap mu ba ha ha yee-hah yee-hah the coach couldn't help but start laughing then turned the air even colder bastard I've taught preschool for years and one of my favorite dad responses to children who are being whiny just to whine as the hi I'm your teacher egg I'm thirsty hi thirsty I'm your teacher anyway one day after a long week I sat down to lunch with my class preschool remember four five year olds and say to a child we'll call him Tommy boy Tommy time really tired today without skipping a beat he swallows his mac-n-cheese looks me right in the eyes and says hi really tired I'm Tommy that was the day I knew I had taught him all I could not a teacher but this happened in an upper-level French class where you can only speak French if you speak English the teacher scolds you in French my friend walked in a few minutes late for a quiz and wasn't allowed to take it my friend looked at a teacher and said in English that's bulls the teacher looked back angrily and said also in English what did you just say my friend and Frances Monsieur he got kicked out of the class in French class we had one guy say to his friend oh you bastard right as the teacher walked in front of them and the whole class got quiet we thought they were in for it instead she goes and Frances se batted in middle school in history class this happened girl hey mr. C how do you spell word idea mr. C D IC tion rry she writes it down stares at it for a moment trying to comprehend why it doesn't look right gets mad a teacher class is dying teacher laughing as well my sister who is a teacher was taking her kindergarten class through the lunch line well this day was st. Patrick day so there was green cupcakes my sister told the class jokingly don't eat too many cupcakes or your turn green a young black boy looks up at her and says miss Carey I ain't never seen a green brother before teacher said now where is Macau friend blurted out in EM field in biology during high school the teacher was teaching us about food chains in a very the house that Jack built Manor he got two cats eat mice but what heats cats although he was referring to fleas I being Chinese immediately said Chinese people the class burst out in laughter but then I had to stand up and apologize to all the Chinese people in men's choir in college we were singing the little drummer boy the director stopped our singing and explained something to us he got distracted and went off on a tangent for about five seven minutes then he pulled himself back around but couldn't remember where he had stopped he asked himself out loud hum now where were we someone and the basses said I think we were on pom the whole choir just lost it if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now [Music]

Channel: Internet Is Fun

Views: 188,498

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Keywords: #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, emkay, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, askreddit school, r/askreddit how to, teachers share, teacher, student, students react, school stories

Id: xK6egH3cQv4

Length: 18min 48sec (1128 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 31 2019