What was your "i'm surrounded by idiots" moment? r/AskReddit | Reddit Jar

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what was your I am surrounded by idiots moment a previous group of friends who we're also very religious not sure if related to the idiocy or not one of the women didn't know if it was roosters or hands that laid eggs one of the women legitimately believed well into her teenage years that all women turned men when they hit puberty WTF dart numerous numerous explanations that Sweden and Switzerland are two different f king countries numerous explanations that yes I work in a hospital no that does not mean I am a nurse yes there exists other jobs in hospitals other than nurses and doctors yes a hospital blood bank needs to be opened 24 strokes seven WTF do you think happens if someone gets hit by a car at 11 p.m. sorry the blood bank is closed come back in the morning for your life-threatening hemorrhage double-quote there was also the standard homophobia and so on of course but in general there were also just morons trying to explain to two of my co-workers why you don't fry a veggie burger in bacon grease the one that put it in the bacon grease was the manager of another location that we borrowed for the summer makes me wonder how many places do this with their veggie burgers tastes like the real thing what's your secret double quote I had to explain the difference between 2d and 3d animation to a friend he still thinks if a drawing looks weedy it is 3d I was drawing a picture using a pencil on a normal piece of paper and someone asked me if it was hand-drawn I will give the most genuine know I could muster in a nonchalant but matter-of-fact way and see what happened the scene mechanical physics sophomore year of college the student dumb as a bag of bricks she was one of those kids who would repeat what the professor just said in the form of a question to make it seem like she was engaged in the lesson when it just makes it seem like you aren't paying attention anyway we had just gone over gravity as a constant on earth 981 ms square and how you can use that for acceleration inserting problems we went over one such problem and um girl raises her hand and asks where we got 981 from fine whatever the professor explains to her that it's gravity and it's a constant on earth so gravity never changes on earth double quote no sometimes we just randomly hurtle off into space it was my junior year of high school and I learned that I was the only one at my lunch table who believed in evolution I went to go speak to a science teacher I was close with at the time because the conversation upset me he also did not believe in evolution used to work in an office of eight all intelligent people working in finance and one day they started discussing the moon landings and how he was faked all of them thought it was faked when asked why I was being so quiet I said I hadn't realized I was working in an office full of absolute idiots double quote last week I overheard my co-workers talk about payday and how excited they were one said they have five books in their bank account and the rest agreed I felt bad until they started talking about going to the club next weekend and getting VIP one said she had to make sure she had enough because she promised her daughter to take her to the movies WTF I didn't even know they had kids by the way they manage their money it kills me when people complain they can't buy their kids stuff or pay bills but they just got their nails done they're done new stuff eat out of gas stations vending machines all the time cable TV yeah you're eating takeout every night while I slave over a hot stove I have no sympathy for that how about you ditch the acrylics and buy your kids and clothes pack a goddamn sandwich for lunch straighten out your priorities and quit bitching I would say it nicer to the person's face though during an exam a lot of classmates were going up to the teacher for clarification on one of the questions the problem was the question used a different phrase and the lecture slides the meaning was reasonably obvious if you thought about it for even one moment but their learning strategy has memorized the slides word-for-word so they were completely thrown off doesn't that say more about the school system though it trains students to memorize and repeat what info they are given not actually having to think if anything I'm pretty sure this is why there's a huge difficulty gap between high school and college you spend most of your time learning memorizing and regurgitating information in high school then when you get to college not only are the concepts more advanced but you have to apply them in different ways that when presented in the slides I was at a restaurant and two teenagers in front of me were having a conversation about Forrest Gump I overhear one of the saying did you know they didn't actually have to cut leftenant Glen's legs off they just used really good special effects then the other one seemed unironically surprised haven't you heard over those actors that lose a lot of weight for a role well Gary Sinise's method of fck and he does what it takes from what I heard he locked them off without yet having secured the part because he is dedicated to the craft that's what ever been in the military the sharpest folks you will find out the junior cats attend one higher level briefing and you'll walk away knowing everyone there is an educated idiot to quote Megadeth military intelligence two words combined that can't make sense double quote to go on a very slightly related tangent that song is really fun in Guitar Hero to go on a slight tangent of a tangent hangar 18 uses the same chords as Metallica's call of fell who as Mustaine wrote both songs I worked behind a bar when I got there it was common for the cleaner to top up the glass washer with the glass washing soap whenever it was low she never looked at the bottle it was in just knew it was red liquid when that ran out she didn't think to read the label on the next bottle which was not read at all she just poured it into the glass washer the other staff didn't notice the change in smell neither did she I came in a few days after noticed it immediately asked some questions and looked at the bottle she'd been using oven cleaner every gas had been washed in used and washed again with oven cleaner for at least five minutes I was speechless I had to explain to a group of students that the Underground Railroad wasn't an actual railroad and that Harriet Tubman was not the conductor of the Freedom Express at least not literally every day teaching middle school I fear for the future of our country edit thanks for all of the encouragement to do my job I'd never considered that before Roe who knew that I could have so much effect on the lives of every single child I come into contact with I alone can make middle schoolers mature caring and intelligent again thank you for turning me toward a light I was working in a bakery that was located in a supermarket they had a walk-in oven for baking racks of bread it was severely neglected as there was scores of carbon buildup on the walls so I took a scraper and who was doing my best to scrape off several layers of carbon that hadn't probably been there for years then some idiot locked me in the oven the inside of the oven did have an emergency release and it was broken by the same idiot who locked me in so I'm kicking of it all I climbed trying to knock the damn hinges off trying to get someone to open the [ __ ] door which took at least 10 minutes finally the manager opens the door and he's screaming mad at me that I'm trying to break the oven and everyone else working there is laughing their asses off that almost cooking someone is f king hilarious when I was around 14 my sister took me to the Broadway Lion King show that was touring in our city I loved it and at the end my sister got her a souvenir t-shirt of scar with a picture of him and the classic quote I am surrounded by idiots one day during summer tennis day camp I decided to wear shirt for no special reason just one of the shirts I like to wear half way through some kids come up to me all pissed of telling me that they are not idiots and are offended by my shirt I try to explain that it's just a shirt but they eventually get the camp counselors involved and I am forced to change shirts because of this I didn't think they were idiots before but I did afterwards ten plus years ago I was on the cheerleading squad in high school we had an Indian girl on the squad and when we introduced ourselves she jokingly said I'm so-and-so but most people just know me as that Indian chick she was the only Indian student in the whole school this was rural Virginia one of the freshmen girls looks in Oran asks our what tribe and the Indian girl responds no I mean I am actually an Indian person to which another freshman girl replies yay but like what kind dot again no I am an Indian person from the country of India a third freshman girl pipes in okay but which tribe is that Dart so many stereotypes confirmed in a single afternoon I'm not [ __ ] on cheerleaders I love cheerleading we just had a dumb batch that year I was in hair school and overheard a conversation some of the girls were having about berries they all said a raspberry is half blueberry and half strawberry they were 100% serious one time when I was working at a coffee place back in college I was expelling by the pastry case and this middle-aged woman was telling her friend how much healthier dark bread was for you the darker the bread the healthier it was she then turns to the pastry case and points and goes like this look how dark that bread is we should get that what kind is it double quote to which I had to keep a straight face and say that's our chocolate pound cake double quote woman looked mortified and her friend was highly entertained every time I fly or more specifically by the gate and during the seating no one understands the wonders of one queue whereas in front go wherever there is an open Airport attendant the efficient and orderly way to do it and during seating every goddamn person just must stand in the middle of the f king aisle to put their oversized 70 kilograms carry-on in the overhead compartment instead of stepping into your row before doing so which would let others pass by you to find their own seats in the meantime I had never heard an airplanes to your desk L at the entire passenger group before the time our plane missed its takeoff because my fellow Scandinavians aren't able to move their self-absorbed Sheikh minded asses in a normal pace they should equip airplane staff with buttons so they can motivate the passengers to get a move on f king hell exhale my anatomy and physiology teacher found a baby animal and said it was a squirrel I didn't think so because its snout was way too long to be a squirrel she acted like she had never heard the word snout before and the class sided with her saying I was just being a know-it-all I didn't let it go and the class insisted that I just shut up instead of putting it in a box she placed it on the cold lab countertop which the poor thing fell off multiple times to the which that b tch scolded me to stop worrying about then she force-fed it's squirrel formula it died it turned out to be a raccoon still boils my blood to this day I'm pretty sure that class hated me I knew a lot because I spent a lot of time reading I may not be a genius but I know enough to see when someone is a pretentious [ __ ] this was my first time dealing with an anti-intellectual crowd where they blindly followed an authority figure rather than hear out someone who actually knew what they were talking about it's bitter I was going for a warehouse job I got to better offer the day after this training but I had to do a little aptitude test which consisted of some incredibly basic maths which I flew through now I wouldn't describe myself as a mathematician by any measure but the kid we are both 1819 maybe next to me puts his head in his hands and just goes I don't know what 153 years the instructor comes over and tells him the answer which I thought was weird because what's the point of the test took me a couple of seconds to realize she told him the answer was three I mentioned in the kingdom of loathing sub Reddick that accordion thieves have no Flair and were swiftly down voted because everyone thought I was saying they were unstylish when I was really pointing out that they have no use of flair on the subreddit to be fair everything looks lame next to a disco bandit the first time I played the game went something like so the total Taylor and the seal clubber seemed to be muscle class and the sorcerer and the pastor more disco bandit I'm picking the disco bandit I worked part-time in a fast-food restaurant over the summer while off uni and the new you at q10 note came up in conversation here in the U K dot I noted how it hadn't recently been changed from Charles Darwin to Jane Austen at which point I noticed my four co-workers were staring blankly at me they didn't know who either was worse still when I offered the crazy simple overview that Austen was a female for from the 19th century one of them actually remarked God how do you know this stuff double quote I got a job washing dishes the current dishwasher was training me the machine ran out of detergent so he logged out a new five-gallon bucket these don't open so you have to stab a hole in the cap to get the hosing I'm dubious but I'm 17 it's my first day on the job he grabs a serrated knife he keeps on a shelf for this purpose and starts hammering it into this thick plastic cap the knife sinks in the serrations get stuck and on the return stroke it sprays the chemicals directly into his eyes and he's writhing on the ground the manager comes up and asks me what happened I explained the knifing he looks at me for five seconds reaches down and twists off the cap dishwasher dude went home for the day not that long of a story but when I was six I used to go to church with my dad early morning on Sundays one Sunday my elderly neighbors house was flooded with cops and detectives who were canvassing the whole property looking for clues I guess me and my pops went over to see what the commotion was about only to overhear that the elderly wife at the house thought her husband disappeared or was kidnapped I noticed his new car wasn't there and in a moment of Revelation just screened out where's his Lexus everyone looked at me a bit dumbfounded and had a realization that dude went out for a drive in his new car at six years old I broke the case later on in the day the old man came up to us and told us how stupid the cops were and how thankful he was for me breaking case which brought the complete cluster f ck of cops at his home to an end I had two co-workers who insisted to me that all countries except for a few from South America had pulled out of the 2016 Olympic Games because of the conditions in Rio this would have been bad enough on its own but I worked in a public library at the time and not only was one of these women a reference Clark who apparently didn't know how to research they both refused to listen to me or read the articles debunking their claims and they told patrons about it my jimmies were so rustled I was watching a show with my friends about the production of moonshine I told everyone about how moonshine rinsed actually 100% alcohol because there is an upper limits to how pure it can be distilled 95% is generally considered to be that upper limit what astounded me was that everyone I was watching the show with vehemently disagreed on the basis that moonshine isn't 100 percent alcohol it's more like 200 percent alcohol sometimes more all I could think was that this country desperately needed better mathematical education in math class I was surrounded by a group of people who were discussing about yesterday's homework questions the problem was all of the stuff they were talking about sell out of left field that they almost seem incomprehensible so when the lecture starts they started to ask questions to the teacher about the stuff they were discussing the problem was the teacher just nodded and says excellent questions turns out I was the idiot when I was in high school we had an assembly as the means to show the school how diverse our student body was they showed a slit a shower of national flags and we were to cheer when our flag came up it was going fine for a while until the Middle Eastern countries came up and everyone loudly booed my friend from Iraq was a few seats ahead and the look on her face still cups into me I don't blame the teachers their good intentions were ruined by dumb buses trying to be edgy sitting in lab I asked a friend to help me set up a CAD file to go to the laser cutter we've both done it before but she had just run hers so I figured I'd have her double-check mine so I don't f ck up a two-hour cut job she tell me a line needs trimmed so I do it immediately she says to me wow it's so refreshing to work with someone who doesn't need their handheld through the v's things we're in our second year of the major as architects and over half the class can't run cat that's like studying to be a librarian and not knowing how to read note I'm sure many architects use other programs but the first and main program we use is CAD in this school I was playing C's go with four of my friends and discord here's how that turned out guy 1 playing recorder version of all-star while top 10 Shrek moments is playing in the background guy 2 rushing onto site screaming man I wish guy 3 would have bought MEA gun while desperately shooting an enemy with his Glock guy 3 laugh in his ass off while spraying down enemies with an auto with Riptide here a plain guy for bragging that he muted guy 1 in that he is smart for doing so and that he doesn't even know why we play with him and then when we say that he shouldn't say that he responds with now he can't hear me although he can me dying inside a few months ago the company I work for was going through some pretty deep corporate restructuring sir my boss's boss's boss Robert the district manager three rungs higher on the ladder than myself was walking around with a group of other suits from New Jersey fixing problems and non productivity concerns they come up to the Aryan I run and Robert tells me in front of all these suits that I was 18 percent effective yesterday 18 F King percent I tell him that cannot be possible he shows me an excel file and I'm trying to explain how all these numbers are wrong the formulas are incorrect none of it makes any sense I have no clue where these numbers could have even come from I asked him what kind of productivity I would need to run to hit 100% effectiveness he in the series of suits without their cell phones and start trying to drum up the math on calculators it's an awkward moment where everyone is on their phones drawing up numbers based or more numbers that are all totally incorrect I was just shocked that I was surrounded by guys and girls making four times what I do a year fumbling with each other struggling to put together basic mathematical problems none of them were willing to concede that they had absolutely no idea what the f ck they were doing none of them wanted to concede that the guy who's been doing this for ten years would know the sh t better than they do I thought Kafka had over exaggerated the bureaucratic hell presented in his works but at that point I was living it for long not me but I read a story here on reddit where a guy and his class was told Jupiter is bigger than the Sun and the guy argued the whole year that was wrong he argued many times about this and the whole class thought he was an idiot then they went and visited some I don't know Museum and there was a space section with a person who knew a lot about space so the guy raised his hand and asked if Jupiter is bigger than the Sun and the whole class just groans the space guy laughs and says the Sun and the guy is like I told you so I can't find her but I love that story I had an internship in local government once the department I was working for instituted a new committee to be run by representatives of the community and members of the political parties in town it wasn't a huge deal so the people that showed up either really cared about the issue or were scraping the bottom of the political barrel this one guy representing a party I hate to stereotype but he looked very much like he spent most of his time playing Wow in someone's basement which is not a bad thing but kind of not what I look for in a political representative adding to this dude brought his mom to the inaugural meeting she kept telling him what to do in Greek from across the room and here's what's interested for me that local government is not my future this guy who is clearly not your top-tier politician made exactly one contribution to the meeting that day while electing a leader for the committee for which there were two people standing he asked if you've got to have more than one vote I repeat this dude asked if he could have more than one vote on a question with only two possible answers he held us up for five minutes on that question and that was not the most inefficient I saw local government being in my time there [Music]
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Channel: Reddit Jar
Views: 184,024
Rating: 4.8466039 out of 5
Keywords: reddit, r/AskReddit, ask reddit, askreddit, updoot, toadfilms, sir reddit, reddit jar, askreddit funny, askreddit dumb, reddit ama, reddit ask me anything, r/askreddit, reddit stories, reddit story, askreddit scary, askreddit stupid, scary stories, askreddit new, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, askreddit top posts, subreddit, funny reddit, best reddit posts, askreddit stories, best of reddit, reddit best, funny askreddit, storytime with reddit, r/
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Length: 23min 46sec (1426 seconds)
Published: Sat Dec 14 2019
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