What Unexpectedly Turned You On? - Reddit Stories - r/AskReddit Top Posts

/ r / r s' credit what unexpectedly turned you on my wife doesn't really ever swear except when we are doing the deed then she throws around f-bombs freely one day she kicked the corner of the table and screamed out a loud Frick I had a Pavlovian response in my shorts 12 years ago my wife said bleep me like you paid for it I still think about that 70 year old woman said I was handsome got a raging hard-on for some reason I think I need a girlfriend edit bTW guys I'm 20 years old I may or may not have a granny fetish at the very least free cookies you ever had a gal without teeth give you a [ __ ] before lick my ear and I'm down to bleep never get a puppy please tomato in the kitchen was looking extra thick just the other day a girl I was friends with had apparently been giving me hints for a while that I hadn't been picking up on one time we are hanging out and she goes to take a pee she yells at me from the bathroom to come here I walk up to the door and ask her what she needs with no hesitation she says come in here I want you to watch me unexpected turn on for some reason well did you indeed I did she was gorgeous also had lots of mental issues though so we didn't last long together I don't know what it is but something about the just woke up look really gets me like messy hair and loose pajamas it's my kryptonite I wouldn't say it turned me on but I've once seen my teachers bellybutton because her shirt wasn't covering it properly for a moment and let me tell you it's a fine-looking belly the sudden unexpected flash of belly skin on somebody is extremely distracting for me too my French teacher was 400 pounds and her shirt lifted up when she moved you think that belly skin was distracting my girlfriend when she picked up a knife didn't expect that abbit to be clear it was a normal butter knife when we were at dinner she just happened to lick something off the blade and suddenly I was pitching a tent she in no way was attempting to murder me had me worried for a second older women who give off Dom mummy vibes once had an older woman with that short Silver Fox haircut and a stronger jaw call me a good girl while I was at work because I did something right with her order that nobody else could for some reason I'm a relatively straight female or am i well freak idk my fiance makes this sound when he's turned on by something I'm doing all that he's looking at on me but it can be a problem sometimes because he sometimes uses their same sound when he sees like an ad for food that looks really good my hairdresser straddles my leg once in a while and gets really close she also give their best scalp massages I'm pretty sure they do that for the tip which tip though I don't know I female was doing dishes and one of male friends who was visiting who was watching me from the doorway unbeknownst to me when I noticed he was just casually standing there leaning against the frame arms crossed moist did you tell him haha I sure did and then what happened honestly nothing exciting we made out fooled around later we're still brothers to this day this all happened seven years ago someone acting out of character so a shy guy suddenly being aggressive war allowed dude being quiet in a situation that might call for it so like a big loud dude being soft towards a cat or a quiet dude defending someone in a fight once my very quiet and innocent friend who never curses said bleep and I've never been the same since looked me dead in the face asked cash or credit and i bleeped in my pants I just get a grape and I bleeped in my pants an ex-boyfriend lecturing me about money I don't think it was the context just the way he did it like a stern father he did a lot of things in a stern disapproving dad way and idk it was hot I guess this means I have daddy issues idk in modern times it seems like daddy issues but it basically is your brain saying he sounds like a dad when he does this he would make a good dad I should make him a dant I should mate with him or something along those lines I wouldn't worry about my wife on her tiptoes yeah that makes me hot too have you started putting all the snacks she likes way up on the top shelf limited cupboard space so a lot of things are out of her reach an inconvenience to her a blessing to me we were going through our old childhood books to donate to charity and she found this Sesame Street picture book I must have owned as a kid she was going to get rid of it but I wanted to keep it she started reading through it to me to tease me when she go to the section about early taking a bubble bath with his rubber duckie in her teasing voice it awoke something in me I didn't know about myself before we kept that book and now she reads it to me on my birthdays before we have bubble bath sex we finally learn the origin story when my husband looks back when he's backing in the car does that include the putting the arm over the passenger seat back uh yes I do this every time I have a girl in my car for this reason it's a Power Move a couple of years back my girlfriend at the time and I used to have sex while Pandora played every once in a while a car insurance commercial would play in the middle of songs we laughed it off but it didn't distract us from doing the deed fast forward a couple of years forward and I hear that same car insurance commercial instant erection this guy I was seeing called customer service to get a company error corrected he used the softest firmest most Under standing tone I've ever heard and I lost my damn mind my friend will look me in the eye when I'm talking to him and like raise his eyebrows and bleep to show he's listening and god damn is it hot maybe it's a female stereotype but good listeners I fought on foul my former professor took a job as copywriter for the education system in our company so I write the technical stuff send it to him and he'll make it nice to read first time I read his work on my text I was amazed by how well he understood what I meant and made it so much better and I got wet I still sometimes think about certain paragraphs when masturbating Wow that's bleeping hilarious and the guy's probably walking around with no idea he has this superpower taking a Greek mythology course and the DA a curvy redhead said if you want to talk about mythology for hours on end I'm your girl this comment did it for me late to the party but whatever being in my tent like I don't even know when I'm camping and I retire to my tent slip into my sleeping bag and zip up the little tent door I have no idea but apparently that really does it for me what a strangely pure fetish log so popping a tent pops a tent log hitting the rumble strips on the side of the road Plaza change your tires often and your underwear apparently when I was a freshman in college in English boy in one of my classes said the phrase war of attrition with his English accent and I had to go take a breathe their fear years ago I was playing the first Bioshock with an X in a fully darkened room with a wall-sized projector at some point we came across an operating room where the lights were flickering blood everywhere and then got jumped scared by a psycho doctor full-on through that controller across the room and jumped into his arms shortly after he got busy went to yoga with my lady friend at the end of the class the instructor had us all lie on our backs on our mats and she was humming lightly singing then she rubbed a lemony oil on our shoulders and foreheads and the touching and humming gave me a brain chasm and I've been into ASMR ever since my lady friends did not like hearing how much I enjoyed the conclusion to the class a mistake I never repeated it just happens I just went to a barber shop for the first time and be available barber was a female I figured I'd be safest with her all the other barbers are large men with lots of tattoos which I find sexy as hell long beards sharp hair month so said female barber starts working on my hair and I instantly got a lady boner she was so precise with her hand movements not one motion wasted the gentle deliberate way she worked on my hair faded sides I have a mohawk of sorts and the straight blade clean up really put my mind in a difficult place she was definitely not my type but it did not matter she put a warm towel on my neck and gave me what I am so glad was not the best massage I'd ever had because if she had I'm pretty sure I would have moaned audibly in 30 minutes I had so many shivers shoot down my spine and as a result I definitely needed sex she was nothing but the perfect example of professionalism and respect but she was so skilled that I noticed through her hand movements I only had to say once what I wanted she heard every word and executed it perfectly passion for your work may also be a thing of mine long kind of like a reverse hair down moment don't know how to describe it first time noticing was a girl I kind of knew in high school sort of pretty with really long brunette hair in a science class it was a practical lab so no hanging hair in just one sweep she gathered up all her hair and pulled and tied it into a ponytail and slipped on the safety glasses and I was just gone was going to say the same thing my first date with my girlfriend she put her hair up the bun and it felt like time was moving in slow motion I wasn't sure if I was gay or not in those few seconds cleared that one up I told her about it and she said it felt a little awkward to her actually she was struggling to get her hair in the time but I enjoyed it first off I'm a guy so my high school hid a darkroom for a black and white film photography program I was the only boy in the course there were about 10 15 girls in the class I was pretty good and by my junior year I had been involved in the program longer than any other student having so much experience led to me being a good place to go for advice on printing their photos I would go to their station to figure things out and the same three friends of mine that were girls in that class would come up behind me and dress their chin on my right shoulder and that would always wake me up I never expected something like that to send goosebumps up and down my body and warrant a reaction downstairs but it happened and I took it in stride from then on not the same thing but I had something similar where I was talking to a female co-worker one day about back pain and for some reason she started telling me how your spine alignment or something can be related to your mood and proceeded to run her fingers from the top of my spine to the bottom twice to check my alignment and IDK why but that bleep sent me and just goes to show human touch is a very powerful thing hang out mini golfing with a group of friends our resident goof was being her typical self kinda ditzy and along for the ride but not very skilled just saw two aloof also she's into me but it's unfortunately not mutual we all went to play pool as a last minute decision and as it turns out parent has a pool table in her house and she's been playing for ages every week she snapped instantly into an extremely unusual focus and level of skill the pool cue was an extension of the body that she was moving across on and around the table like it was a sophisticated dance that nobody knew better than her I have never been more aroused by that woman than I was that night ever since it's been the same group dynamic she's been the same person that I'm platonically friends with I'll never forget how she woke something up in me that night though or how weird it was the last number of your like is who powers you get comment who you got [Music] [Music]

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Keywords: reddit, askreddit, askreddit funny, top posts, top posts of r/, r/, r/askreddit, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, top posts of all time, askreddit question, askreddit top posts, ask reddit, askreddit reading, subreddit, reddit stories, best of r/askreddit, funny reddit, best reddit posts, best of reddit, toadfilms, for kids, fun, kids, that ask reddit, turned you on, What Unexpectedly Turned You On, turn someone on, turned, you, on, thirst music

Id: xQSaZRgd94Y

Length: 14min 2sec (842 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 26 2019