What happens when the squad goes on vacation? | Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm having my bachelor party tomorrow night and I want you to be there we'll make up a criminal alist for you so you can meet the boys obviously that's a super cool plan but no I don't want your pity suit yourself but it's going to be one sexy ass weekend like how sexy ass are we talking here private jets to Miami baby and there's a red carpet forget the red carpet private jet yes and the jet the jet is better Miami here we come what are you doing here it's only been 4 days you're supposed to take a full week off of work come on sarge does it look like I'm on the job okay then what are you doing here taking your advice to rest and relax to the next level swinging by to pick up Charles and then we're headed to Sunny beachy only recently devastated by financial crisis Atlantic City that's right suckers Jake and I are going on the coolest vacation ever official trip nickname ACDC Atlantic City dudes Club yeah that's going to change but check it out sge Bo and I are staying at the r damn this place is Lux yeah I've been trying to get Jake down there for ever had I known all it take was a few broken bones I would have hit him with a baseball bat years ago Serge it's a spa and a casino a spao one of the room service options is a Carving Station talking prime rib in bed and what's this I'm using a blanket as a napkin that's fancy that's fancy real fancy all right well that sounds good Jake sounds like you guys are going to have fun oh oh we will cuz we're staying at the Rana Jake this is not the Rena no it is not this place is amazing I've never had sex outside the United States what are you thinking about weirdly the same thing W Welcome To Paradise Margarita yes I would love one but is there any way you could put it in a coconut it would be my pleasure sir thank you I requested a ridiculous thing and he's doing it quick think of more stupid stuff we can ask for grapes sorry I panicked and I couldn't think of anything no no no grapes is perfect excuse me sir is there any way you could get my wife some grapes yes sir right away he's running he's running for the grapes here are your drinks and a lovers tool box from a Mr boil ah thank you so much we will never open this oh my God Jake look yes the grapes oh and you brought cheese I don't even want cheese no Jake in the lounge Captain Holt haral IA who knew a prisoner transfer could be like a mini vacation huh hey man thanks a lot for telling me to come up here yep that was great of me this place is really romantic mhm uh not that romantic actually the radiator in our room sounds like a woman screaming yeah oh and there was a dead crow in our toilet you should complain about that our place is really nice it's got a fireplace I want to snuggle up next to that thing with you no I don't want to do that because of the cancer risks most people don't know this but sitting by a fire is actually worse than sucking on a tailpipe of a bus because of the germs fumes oh you know when we first started Dayton Amy and I found this really nice B&B up in the Poconos we got that sweet City employee discount remember that babe Teddy think fast drink menu I'm sorry man Chuck that right at you I just thought you really wanted a drink oh I never need a drink menu I got the Thrills for the pills cuz I'm a Piller man oh hadn't hurt that's it I can't stop myself Jericho Jericho Jericho ow dad's pulling out all the stuff what's going on I want to break it up us I want to break us up hey folks welcome to the maple drip in everyone excited to be here we having a good time this is so great yeah seagull check the ocean check a gang of oldies and short shorts check check check we are definitely on a cruise welcome aboard say I love Carousel cruises International LTD I love Carousel cruises International say that all right so the sailway party is in an hour and until then I have a schedule to take in live music at the all ages piano Lounge okay okay or we could just head straight to the room I brought a plastic tarp so we can eat shrimp in bed but the all ages piano Lounge has bottomless Margaritas yeah they also have a drink with a potato skin in it oh to the all ages piano Lounge Mur mhm welcome aboard ladies and gentlemen but especially ladies I know that voice get ready it's time for some smoo songs Doug Judy the Pontiac Bandit he's here we got songs about smooshing songs for smushing too songs for the kids this is the all ages piano loung I can't believe he's here I've been hunting him for years and now Fate has dropped him right into my lap he's going to be so surprised when he sees me hey Peralta you made it what took you so long brother okay he seems like he's playing it pretty cool probably more surprised on the inside seriously I was looking forward to this trip I can't believe you lied to me it wasn't a lie it was an illusion all right it was a lie I'm sorry I had to make it sound really cool so you drop everything and come with me I can't let Olsson walk and I can't catch him alone plus this is going to be super fun new trip nickname ACDC Atlantic City detectives Club okay fine you know I can't say no to a good trip nickname there he is no arm rib arm rib shoulder Peralta it's no coincidence you own a ship you want a free Cruise without entering a contest how do you think that happened I don't know maybe it's because I bought Speed 2 on DVD and the internet realized that cruises were one of my interests great film Sandy being a song DN straight but the ticks are all me I brought you here cuz I'm in Peril Peril don't my Peril somebody's trying to kill me and I need protection so I said for my best friend I am not your best friend I'm your worst enemy get that through your head it's this kind of bickering that makes us such an adorable horrible couple whatever Judy you're under arrest you can't arrest me boo we're in international waters which is also why I can smoke as much weed as I want welcome to the high seas no no way that that's true Amy tell me I can arrest him right now Judy's right we have no jurisdiction technically this boat flies under the flag of usbekistan uh-oh your girl knows about theck oh this jet is insane there's a private Chef that'll make anything you ask for no matter how expensive I just ordered Lobster Asante oh damn what's that I don't know I just said the fanciest words I can think of oh I'm going to get the vo prime minister M that sounds good hey you want to try out the Smo shush what you have one with you I take it everywhere baby yeah there it is yeah so it's noise cancelling it's so heavy it's crushing my bones yeah that was the shar's problem with it too I can't breathe get it off me get it off me you sound exactly like Barber right now disappointed in you Jake pilot says we're starting our descent then let's get changed boys changed but these are my coolest clothes I got them from a targeted Instagram ad after looking at photos of Cam Newton outfit is beautiful but it doesn't really say Miami what does say [Music] Miami are you sure this is culturally okay for me we're going to find out all [Music] right you still no movement how's the snack machine snacks abound told you this place was awesome my theory is that olon and his brother have been using it as a home base while they rob places up and down the coast fascinating fascinating do you desire a Crispen potato ah don't mind if a doble wait a minute Crispen potato why are you fancy talking how dare you sir I speak the common tongue there it is again you only do that when you're lying or hiding something hiding Bish Posh housekeeping that's not housekeeping that's betrayal I can't believe you called a Sarge hey Sergeant since the rejection of great sadness has enveloped me I kept expecting this dark feeling to pass but it's only gotten worse not getting the job you want stinks in first grade I was passed over for line leader and I'm still pissed Kyle D's lines had curves and gaps and cutting Galore was a freaking Carnival yeah what's a line leader well it's not just that I didn't get the job it's that John Kelly did he's already released a memo detailing his Vigilant policing initiative it's essentially a return to stop and frisk choosing him is a betrayal of everything I stand for I feel the same way about Kyle D I tried to suck it up and go back to work I put on my uniform and got in my car next thing I knew I was on a plane to Mexico didn't even pack a bag I bought a bundle of novelty shirts at a nearby gift shop this one says what's up beaches instead of [ __ ] for humor reasons but you hate humor well I'm a joke now so it suits me okay but how did you end up here in Mexico at the exact same tiny Resort as us J has been talking up this place for years referal code g 30 I had no idea you'd be here you know what it's fine sir a lot of people go on their honeymoon with their boss no I thought if I said it out loud it would normalize it but it's weird it's going to be okay how long are you staying sir just until I get my head right but don't worry I'll steer clear of you two you won't even know I'm here this place is so romantic yeah and so intimate don't worry I'm not listening to you I'm just thinking about how this seab bass is cold but not as cold and cruel as the hands of Fate that have thrust my entire life into darkness ah damn it I just ordered the sea bass Jake Amy welcome to my cabin aka the boom boom State room this is a Royale level suite I never thought we'd see one in person Lil perk being Carousel Cruisers Entertainer of the Year which I am girl [Music] little pitcher you're welcome to chill here it's the least I can do to thank you for protecting me never this protection scam is a scam do you honestly think you can fool me again just because you've successfully done it numerous times before look my old boss wants me dead I've been laying low on this ship and I got word from a friend on the inside that they found me and there's a Hitman coming to end my beautiful life that's why I sent you the free tickets no no no way I'm not buying it you can't get away from me again Amy and I are going to spend every second of our romantic Cruise walk watching you assuming that's okay yep that's what we're going to do I'll just get rid of this itinerary no no no no as don't put that down we have to find a Hitman before he finds me I'm guessing this will take us all over the boat oh yeah that's an enex Stitch right there every nook and cranny perfect we'll just enac sitch uh of this [ __ ] knock knock man I do too many do I know I thought it would be funny but it's just really scary one of them watch me bathe yeah we should definitely turn them around yeah oh no they have their names written on the back I'm Meritus will you be my mother God oh okay look the dolls are gross but I think once we bury them this place could be kind of romantic yeah totally but you know what would be even more romantic is hanging out fully clothed with two other people who have fallen out of love what did you do all right don't be mad I invited Teddy up to surprise Amy but it turns out she wants to break up with him and now I promised her that I would run interference and I feel like I let you and all of our demon children down it's okay you're just trying to do something really nice for friend and it blew up in your face rather spectacularly everything I do is spectacular it's a curse thank you for being understanding yeah well for the record very cool girlfriend the coolest hey and Teddy doesn't get here for another 30 minutes till then what's Mel great plan in the closet where they can't watch us yep SM a puppets oh there's so many puppets in there my oh my boil can you even tell me what is happening in this picture uh that's me doing a jean clad vanam split between two beds I had to wear my underwear for flexibility mhm and uh Santiago I believe that is me throwing up into a pillowcase uhoh you have all embarrassed the precinct now when people think of the 99 they'll think of um oh detective Diaz filling an iron with tequila so I can make tequila steam I can't quite believe I'm going to say this but I'm sorry I even came to Rochester Captain I'm sorry that things got out of hand but you can still be on the board I read 85 pages of the convention bylaws that was unnecessary I don't want to be on the board but I read bylaws I want to show you a picture from last night that really upset me okay but in my defense Rosa B me 50 cents that I couldn't drink all that shampoo that's not what I wanted to you drank shampoo what no you're the one farting bubbles this is what I wanted to show you do you know what disappoints me most about this picture that I'm not in it I can't remember the last time I saw the 99 so happy and I wasn't there cuz you were working on your presentation to get us a win yeah well it wasn't a real win I wish i' had been in that photo I know and I'm sorry you didn't have more fun this weekend but it's not over and we are still in Rochester what are you saying I think you know what I'm saying what a thermometer look at the Mercury reservoir on that mamasita oh Peralta this is amazing I'm floating on air hey everybody get in for a picture excuse me sir can you take a picture of us than everybody say Daniel Gabriel Farenheit Daniel Gabriel F I got five down I figured out the theme it's boats okay I get it she's smart and lovable you're Scrappy and lovable together you're just lovable and lovable okay so where's this hit man Judy look I don't know who they sent but he's on the boat check out this manifest somebody boarded in sanan named Henry koh's Henry Street and koh's Street that's the corner of your old Chop Shop in Brooklyn this is an alias and my porter buddy checked out Henry Cole's cabin he hasn't been in it yet he's hiding somewhere on his boat ready to jump out and kill me at any moment probably creeping around in my closet or stowed away in a Lifeboat or hiding in a wall or Hol Up in the engine room camouflaging the Shrubbery Predator Style no we are not having fun you will not suck me in with your Wy charms oh babe this is so nice there are hot stones on our butts for no reason not on mine my butt Stones keep falling off cuz I'm so tense about whole being here and ruining everything hasn't been that bad really oops sorry can't even float right just push me away everyone else does it's not great but as long as we stay in here we're safe we're all to sanago I'm in your room what how patio door was open I pushed through the Hedge tell me what is it about me that screams Loser yeah you know we're kind of in the middle of getting massages right now sir oh how thoughtless of me I'll get down here so you can see my face oh no that's hello the question was what is it about me that screams loser okay so remember this is Deputy Commissioner Grayson and his smoking hot wife you'll recognize her because she looks like an older Patty Leone and you're sure that this is the floor the staying on yes I call the secretary and pretend her to be his mother or should I say the lady Grayson very slly it's a little trick I picked up from the original bad boy a Mr Bugs Bunny commissioner Grayson is that you I'm sorry do I know you oh Raymond hle captain of the 99 what are you doing here oh I'm on vacation you vacation vacation vacation vacation while we're on the subject of um things are you by any chance in charge of the Brooklyn Precinct contraction I don't want to talk about that if you have an issue bring it up with your auditor well our auditor is actually listen fellas if you think you're helping your pring's cause you're not hey sexy you ready to go oh so my goddaughter what so Grayson's a philander what's that got to do with the price of onions I don't know sir this could be an opportunity I mean wwbd right what would bugs do good question what would bugs do bugs would blackmail Grayson then I sir am no bugs I won't break the law well I'm not saying blackmail and blackmail them we just insinuate that we know what's going on and let him fill in the blanks oh so it's like he blackmails himself uh-huh you just go up to him and say commissioner Grayson how's your wife commissioner Grayson how's your wife no that just sounds like you're really want to know how she is insinuate maybe had to pause before wife commissioner Grayson how's your wife too long f it this is not my strong suit no no sir sir sir you're doing great just forget the pause use your eyebrows like this how's your pump pump pump wife how's your pump pump pump wife uh it was a little bit better in my head try this how's your pump wife pump pump and on a double PP pump this risky you'll see right through me how about pump pump how's your pump you forgot to say wife a good note okay so we can't get away from Hal should we tell him to leave that he's ruining our honeymoon oh we can't that would crush him and he's already so crushed wait I got it we kill halt no I know that was crazy for a multitude of reasons we have a bunch of fun activities planned if we include him it'll cheer him up and he'll leave right but aren't most of our activi is kind of geared towards Couples name one coup's activity that wouldn't be more fun with your boss there welcome to sensual food tasting the art of feeding your lover I feel like I don't belong here I love the way the mud revitalizes your skin and I love how it masks my shame I am loving this this is actually quite Pleasant you know when you invited me to join you today I was skeptical I had been sitting by the pool contentedly watching a bee struggle to avoid drowning and thinking to myself how I am like that bee man I hope it survived we can't afford to lose any more bees it didn't the point is I'm glad you invited me into your frivolous activities you help me to remember there's more to life than the NYPD wow that's great to hear sir I feel a lot better I think I may be heading home unless you need a third for tonight's activities uh what do we sensual Pottery I think we're good you brought your own shuffle board stick M they call tanks you should be glad she has own don't want to messing with another man's Tang there's no way they're called tangs it's true they are and the discs are called biscuits tangs and biscuits that is so dumb I officially love shuffle board clear a path I'm about to whip my biscuit about time you smil Jake you being a real tang in the mud hey L advice Amy is great you want to keep her be be more receptive to her interests all right now you're taking it too far Judy I don't need relationship advice for my criminal arch nemesis look I just want to see you too happy no this is just another one of your lies just like your fake Hitman there's a Hitman on his boat Henry Kohl's is coming to kill me excuse me what you said by name I'm Henry Kohl's you're Henry Kohl's according to my medical alert bracelet well this is interesting this is Henry Kohl's let's just take a look at that oh it says Doug Judy is a liar actually it says I'm a fall risk you're kind of ruining my burn here Henry what the hell was that you almost blew my cover yeah they're all suspicious now you have to help us convince them that Jake's not a cop why I don't understand why you invited him this is supposed to be a crazy weekend of boobs and butts Judy Judy you're not going to see boobs or butts this weekend I'll see butts if I want to see butts and Jake is here because he's my friend and he really wanted to come no he's up to something he's probably here to arrest Chuck I would never arrest Chuck but I mean why'd you say that what did Chuck do wow cop always be cooping that's not true I do bad things one time I illegally downloaded an no toown album dang that's one of the hardest boy bands exactly they're scary look I can be cool as long as no one commits any major crimes in front of me it's not a problem we don't have to break the law to have fun we'll have some drinks smoke some Cubans eat a steak eat a crazy big or crazy small whichever is more expensive I'd rather see butts fine if I let you see butts will you convince the guys at Jakes not a cup how many butts are we talking six 10 seven fine eight I'll meet you in the middle n you waited too long now it's up to 14 14 butts she's a grown woman just let her see butts man thank you Jake thank you for coming to my Aid on the butt thing one step closer to trust now I'm going to go out there and help your Fedora wearing Jason morz looking ass okay I think I look like Andy Garcia in this you look like Seth Green Seth Green no Tom Green you're thinking of Tom Green Tom Green no go back to Jason morz I came down here to stop you from doing something stupid I called the acpd and told them we had a possible per at this Motel they s in a squad car wow boil the fact that you would sell me out after I brought you to Atlantic City on a half expenses paid best friend's trip I know I'm sorry it's just I was worried about you getting hurt no Charles don't apologize we're mad at him I had to miss family dinner to drive my ass out here well no one asked you to do that actually I did remember I betrayed you Charles what are you doing bud I just dug you out of this Peralta we're going home as soon as that squad car gets here until then you sit tight you're on timeout it's your timeout there fine but first I have to go to the bathroom and it will be work due to my injured tailbone and bruised bladder yeah yeah what the hell please be Olsen please be Olsen please be olssen you're not Olen oh no [Music] uhoh he's leaving our plan worked we saved our own honeymoon and fun bonus we cheered up halt yes okay it's time to celebrate you know what that means this bee needs a c in her a oh my God this babe needs a coconut in her arms Oh I thought you were saying this needs a oh my God yeah that was my reaction all right I'll go get us a couple of coconuts ah hey there Captain I haven't seen you looking this happy since they picked up the Drells and Corfu for a fourth season yes well I've reached the best part of every Vacation review the charges well don't let me interrupt have a safe flight and I'll see you back at the 99 tell us how you stole the diamond so we can just reverse it won't work we took them from the luggage downstairs posing as Bell hops it was a onetime opportunity and now the fakes I locked in a safe and a bodyguard protective Suite well lucky for you I have a long past in Heist planning that's how I proposed to my wife that's a great story it makes me cry every time oh thank you I guess I'll tell it you see once a year at Halloween I can tell that I'm losing the room I'll just move on so here's how our thing is going to go now every Hotel safe has an override code in case guests leave them locked that code is kept on the concierge's computer do you know who this is this is Matt Daniel the most popular male ASMR performer on Twitch ASMR performer someone who speaks real soft also crinkle paper we're trying to stream and the noise on eighth floor is unacceptable my fans can't hear my mouth sounds I'm so sorry I can't hear you that's the point Georgina he says that's the point Georgina this is taking too long make a video tell your 25 million subscribers to never stay at this crap Hotel no no no I'll take care of it let me talk to my general manager you better run Matt don't get you're straying your beautiful voice once we hack into the computer and get the override code Trudy will put on a housekeeper's uniform and I will gracefully hide in her car I got it [Music] myself then after the Russian goes out for the night Trudy will show up for Turn Down service and I sneak out when the guards are distracted by Trudy's signature sexy housekeeping Trudy will then exit leaving me behind in the suite so I can unlock the balcony door for Chuck and Doug who are waiting outside on the window washer rig Chuck will bring the stolen diamonds and I'll use the override code to put them back where they belong then we head down to the room where we party like [Music] Helly it's exactly 14 just like you promised you did promise her butts [Music] n [Music]

Channel: Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Views: 149,836

Keywords: Brooklyn Nine-Nine, brooklyn 99, b99, Stephanie Beatriz, Rosa Diaz, Jake Peralta, Andy Samberg, Detective Charles Boyle, Melissa Fumero, Detective Amy Santiago, Detective Jake Peralta, Terry Jeffords, Amy Santiago, Chelsea Peretti, Andre Braugher, Gina Linetti, Terry Crews, Joe Lo Truglio, brooklyn 99 i want it that way, brooklyn 99 bloopers, brooklyn 99 backstreet boys, brooklyn 99 funny moments, brooklyn 99 captain holt, brooklyn 99 cold open, brooklyn 99 full episode

Id: oVpJXEfgTbM

Length: 25min 13sec (1513 seconds)

Published: Sun Jun 30 2024