What Basic Life Skils Did You Get To Teach Your Spouse? (r/AskReddit)

what basic life skill were you surprised to find your boyfriend/girlfriend spouse didn't have when you first started dating wife can't swim she said her mother wouldn't let her learn because she was afraid of her drowning that's the opposite of what swimming is for this is a watch she has taught me post I grew up in a hoarder squalor house like on TV so when I first moved out and got a place with my girlfriend at the time I had to basically be taught every domestic skill apart from cooking which I had already taught myself and that was like 11 or 12 years ago and I still learn things every now and then from my wife an upbringing like that isn't something you just overcome at the drop of a hat after being out of that environment for so long visiting home now sometimes feels like visiting and uncontacted tribe in the Amazon where I observe primitive behaviors that I evolved out of but are still prevalent within the family ah how do I politely explain to my husband that his mom is a hoarder in that the cleaning tidying skills he never learned are not crazy outlandish requests I just want him to understand things go places not just wherever you happen to put them down and that things like toilets and sheeps have to get cleaned periodically basic life skills he annex from long ago couldn't comprehend certain daily tasks he thought any kind of soap could be put in the dishwasher he would leave things in the oven and forget about them for hours thought you only needed to shower or brush your teeth every few weeks I once witnessed him make a milkshake and not put the lid on the blender crap went everywhere and he was genuinely perplexed at the outcome if he didn't feel like working one day he just quit and apply for another job the worst part was he truly believed I was an idiot for thinking him wrong or suggesting he changed his habits I felt like a Wrangler at the zoo or a parent to a 25 year old man baby had to file seven years back taxes for a girl she had simply never done them and didn't know that after University and working minimum and low wage job since high school that it meant she'd be getting back thousands of dollars like twenty one thousand dollars how to use a broom not like lazy but literally has never handled a broom before and doesn't have the motor memory for a sweeping motion I actually kind of have to work hard not to laugh as it's adorably watching a grown human being handling a broom like a toddler my biggest smack my head moment with my wife was when she called me and told me that she had just met with the road service guy and due to running out of gas I asked where she had run out and she told me the location it was in the same parking lot that contained the Shell gas station about 50 yards away from where she was parked sigh dental care she nearly dumped me when I pointed out that it's not normal for teeth to be brown on the edges I didn't notice it initially because the brown was eternally covered by white fossilized food residue eventually I was able to make it clear that I just care about her health and she's been working through about five thousand dollars in fillings root canals and gum treatments as quickly as her insurance will let her some people just have poor genetics in the teeth and gum Department i water pick floss brush twice a day mouthwash sometimes fluoride have had seven root canals I'm in my twenties being able to determine whether my hands are free or not like I'd be carrying a two-handed tilt and she wants to hand me the glass of water she just poured like yes please balance it on my shoulder reminds me of the old Mitch Hedberg joke away he has eight apples and the cashier asks if he wants a bag no thanks I juggle but only eight if I'm ever buying nine apples freaking bag em up cleaning specifically dude have no idea where dust came from thought that if he didn't go over to that part of the room it wouldn't get dusty and therefore didn't need to be cleaned I mean I don't exactly know where dust comes from either I know it shows up wherever it wants but I couldn't trace it back to a particular place of origin when texting I have to write a sentence and wait and answer if I write more than one she only reads the last one always ugh I knew a guy like that made me think there was something wrong with my phone such that some messages weren't sending but nope he just wasn't reading all of them my dad likes to make bread and I gave my boyfriend who I'd been dating for a year at that point a loaf we decide to have a slice and he just cuts the entire loaf in half he wasn't sure where to go from there I suppose a lot of people just buy sliced bread and never make their own the ability to close cabinet doors basic budgeting skills it's like she thought that her monthly balance had to be zero how not to drive like a jackass she tailgated stopped late swerved randomly because she wasn't paying attention and it has taken a lot of patience to get her to the point where I am cool with her driving the kids around her sister is still a horrible driver an ex gf was from a wealthy family and I'd get calls about everyday life stuff all the time how do I choose which head of lettuce at the grocery store how do I use a gas pump clothes iron sandpaper why are there so many kinds of shovels and which one should I buy my favorite was about the falafel falafel that's how they get you you have to buy the dirt to the ability to understand how lint roller works he didn't know that the sheets peel off the roll just thought when the top sheet was covered you threw it out and got a new one dated a girl who called me one night asking me if it was safe to put plastic in the oven when I said no she laughed nervously and said she might have set her house on fire she did I was confused by much in that conversation but the main thing was why she was calling me and not a fire department she also couldn't tell her left's from her rights it was odd because other than that she was a generally intelligent human being had a room he once who called me at work to ask what she should do about the flames coming out of the charcoal grill on the apartment balcony cooking like at all she would burn pasta soon after I married my wife she was cooking pasta wife could you get me the cauldron me the what wife you don't know what a cauldron is it's the thing you used to drain the water out of the past me you mean the calendar she was embarrassed and it's been an inside joke ever since comma caldron comma drain the water out of the past maybe she's a witch heck bent on removing all water from the earth my current partner is pretty good at the whole life skills thing but my ex was a hot mess in that regard he didn't know how to do anything in terms of taking care of himself I asked him to mind the pastor that was cooking for five minutes while I went to grab something and when I came back he was just standing there watching it boil over without doing anything he tried to run the dishwasher it's filled it with just rinse aid instead of detergent because they're basically the same thing right when he did laundry he would leave the wet clothes in the washer for three four days and then be surprised when they milled you'd literally every time he never budgeted just spent whatever he felt like mostly on expensive sports equipment et Cie and then would call his parents in a panic if he got an overdraft fee before his next payday he'd clearly been babe at all to heck and I would have had a lot more sympathy except that her most of these things were pretty easy to just google if you didn't know how to do them and be whenever I tried to gently correct him on how to do something he'd file for handle and accuse me of being condescending and nagging so yeah by the end of our relationship I'd kinda lost all respect for the guy my GF is a forensics chemistry major with two minors and she's brilliant but she has trouble telling which way to turn when giving directions and confuses our left and right if she says go left my safest bet is probably turning right because left would be me turning into oncoming traffic a tree a wall or just the way we don't need to go it's kind of cute now but at the beginning it was confusing I totally have this problem unfortunately for me no one in my life finds it cute he couldn't spell my name right my name is hazel it's not exactly common but it's not super rare either English five letters not so bad and it wasn't that he was dyslexic either he was whipped smart and had no problems with spelling anything else his text messages were all perfectly punctuated his grammar was on point he'd proofread my work from time to time it's not a thing I would have expected him to have a problem with but in the three months we dated I was a hazel a hazel a hazel a hazel and a hazel not once do I recall him getting it right it got to the point where I thought he might be doing it on purpose either because he thought it was cute or to annoy me but no it was just a complete blind spot for him it didn't last for other reasons but dang I mean is it too much to want your name spelled right Jesus I misspelled my now wife's last name one time in a letter and I was miserably embarrassed it never happened again fundamentally all of them his mother basically anticipated that he would find a good woman to take care of him so he was essentially treated as a child he couldn't cook not even ramen he didn't know how to repair a car didn't understand how to clean shop all not only did he failed a budget he fundamentally had no clue how much stuff cost I refuse to live with him I know a woman raising a son like that she has said that she's not bothering to teach him how to cook or clean because he'll find a wife to do that for him when someone asked her what if he didn't get married she said he'll just make good enough money to be able to hire a maid my husband can't ride a bike he was never taught my girlfriend is wonderful she has abusive and neglectful parents her 14 year old brother hasn't been in school for two one-stroke two years he's not getting homeschooled either she's also really smart she had to teach herself everything get up by herself make all her own food and learn on the fly I respect the crap out of her but out of this came extreme anxiety whenever she makes decisions because if something goes wrong it's her fault and it becomes her immediate responsibility to fix it since she has no support other than me and my parents the consequences when she Fricks up are more severe she can't beside where to eat how she wants her makeup and God forbid she has to make a doctor's appointment I've scheduled every appointment she has had fixed her scooter taken it into the shop and got her onto Obamacare because she was too stressed to initialise she is with me every step of the way so it's not like she is too lazy she works 45 hours a week at REI and is trying to save up for a car and to go to school I've always had a wonderful and supportive family as well as a full ride so I don't feel angry at any of this indecision she is a wonderful cuddly bunny and I've never been happier to be with anyone my current girlfriend doesn't know how to entertain herself other than with Netflix like no other hobbies that she can do on her own which makes it extremely frustrating when I want to play a video game or work on my truck god forbid I take a camping trip with the guys I'll come back into town with a twenty messages saying I'm bored buy her a vibrator body awareness I run into everything he still doesn't understand how I get her doing the most basic of things I'm worried people think I beat my wife because she is constantly hurting herself running into walls and door frames almost weekly she has some new bruise or scrapes she can't remember getting on the opposite side of it my wife was the first woman I had dated that knew how to cook I learned early in life as my mom had mentioned girls love a guy who can cook so I learned how to cook my wife was the first one who not only knew how to cook she cooked stuff from scratch but eyes cakes muffins plus glorious dinners and whatnot I hit 290 pounds before I had to fix myself he was amazed with my socks folding skills you know when you're folding laundry and pair up to matching socks side by side and then fold down the cuffs so that the socks stay paired up together his reaction was like he had watched me perform brain surgery literally mind blown I should have taken it as a sign I can answer this for my former girlfriend all of the skills I was constantly told no just let me do it you want to do it right while growing up for everything except taking out the trash as a result my life skills were severely underdeveloped she understood though and within a month I'd gotten all the basics done including cooking I'm 27 and just went to my first non-emergency doctor visit that I planned and scheduled on my own and it feels incredibly weird to not off hit that milestone already but nevertheless it does feel like a milestone all of them her skill set consisted of mostly smoking weed sidenote xgf now how to use a can opener I was literally blown away how can a grown man not know how to use a car opener at the time girl had no idea how floppy disks or USB drives worked she saved everything in my documents and opened from there she legitimately thought computers were personal as in files stayed where you made them when I stored her essay on a disk and moved it to my computer she thought I was a magician it was insane how to save money she comes from a wealthy family but has a low-paying job I come from a poor family but make decent money for a 20-6 why oh it has been quite the experience trying to explain to hear that I am frugal and would rather cook cheap food and save my money instead of out on a $50 to $100 date every Friday Saturday she just sees it as we make $100 plus K combined and should be able to afford it time management her concept of time is so skewed it's mind boggling and it's caused her to be one of those people who has their own time like people had an hour to whatever time she says she'll be anywhere I didn't understand it until I witness it first time when we were getting ready to leave somewhere together she thinks well I just have to throw clothes on and make up and I'm good so leaving in half an hour is fine however she lets things distract her from her two main objectives and doesn't a lot any extra time for such occurrences example start dressing and makeup then realizes she hasn't fed the dog it also realizes she hasn't beat him so makes a quick snack but while doing that she notices she hasn't taken the trash out and if she doesn't do it now it will attract flies what was I doing again makeup oh yeah where's my coffee oh I hadn't made it yet better do that what's this bowl of yogurt and granola doing here oh yeah I need to eat this okay let's go wait I need to bring this chair up to my mom on the way up to the car proceeds to have 5-minute argument with her mom about nothing in particular and suddenly we are 45 minutes late I had to lay out things with realistic times for her in order to get anything done in a timely manner and still that was hard for her to grasp as in okay listen hon if we have to get groceries it will take 20 minutes just to drive there then 20 30 minutes in the store then another 20 minutes just to get to Michael's to get these party supplies time to look around etc so does it make sense that we're going to need more than one hour to accomplish these things before the party anyway that's part of the reason she's now my ex edit apparently I am by far not the only one here time miss manager managers unite we shall keep the world focused and at least only fashionably late many many have said this is a common symptom or that ADHD I will recommend she get checked out for this she does now have health care which may run out soon we aren't really talking now as we've just recently split ways are not trying to give each other some space but I will bring it up next time she drops off the pup for my dog time thanks everyone for bringing this up and sharing your experiences also just to clarify since some people are missing the part part of why she's my ex there were many reasons why we split up namely that she was not over a long term relationship before we got together and was not emotionally stable or ready for a serious relationship I didn't break up with her just because of this reason I always subtract a half a from the time that I want to leave and tell that to my wife but what annoys me is that she doesn't understand that when I'm ready it means I can walk out the door immediately so when she tells she's ready I have to stand there while she does like eight things before we can leave an ex-girlfriend emphasis on the ex of mine almost set my kitchen on fire because she didn't know that she had to use water when making macaroni literally she just put dry macaroni in a pot and put it in on the stove and expected it to be fine luckily I realized what was happening and was able to swoop in before she caused any serious damage but it took the smell almost a week to leave she didn't know that when the dashed line is in your lane it's legal and theoretically more safe to pass and when it's solid it's illegal I'm not sure if she ever even noticed that the lines change I love my little space cadet I'm actually a little concerned that I knew this from my parents telling me but I don't recall it having come up during my written or practical driving tests Dart it seems important how to use a washing machine he was 33 ffs spot the guy who only ever lived with his parents she doesn't know how to talk to people on the phone or handle money if anything in our house requires a phone call to get it done it's me I also handle the bills if we ever get divorced she is screwed my partner of 15 years was brought up in an abusive torture like environment by her evil parents until she was seized by the state and spend her late teens in foster care I taught her to read and write a very underrated comment thank you for taking care of her how to avoid dairy or take lactate at least she made mac and cheese or something with regular milk and spent a solid hour or two fetal position repeating no more dairy never again over and over if she then started feeling better and immediately insisted we go out for milkshakes milkshakes I tried to tell her it was a poor idea and remind her of her extremely recent condition but she was obstinate I drove and basically had to drag her through the aisle to buy her some lactate she was fine she keeps it in her person Albert never ever remembers to take it literally me I'm lactose in denial we were both twenty-two he'd been living on his own for the past two years and he'd never bought himself bed sheets just slept over a blanket on the mattress he also literally refused to do his own laundry like he just wouldn't he'd get his brother to do it for him in exchange for cash and then when I rolled around he was apparently my job to do his laundry because that's what girlfriends do I felt like I was his mother it didn't last long I asked my ex for a pan to bake a cake and he handed me a pot that's just one example but there are many more basic cooking things he just could not grasp how insurance works it turns out him and his mother both don't know how insurance work he needed a root canal so I gave him a few dentist in our area that took our insurance he said he made the appointment it turns out his mother made the appointment at a clinic an hour away I found out they didn't take our insurance and we had to pay out of pocket after we got there well they said they took insurance I didn't know there were different types he is 32 and she is 65 keeping cooking spices and condiments in the house I came over to cook her a meal I brought over all of the main ingredients expecting her to at least have the basics I asked for the salt she said she doesn't own any I asked for the pepper nope any sort of seasoning at all for the chicken nope cooking oil anything to dress the salad of course not the only thing in her fridge was a few bananas and a tub of I can't believe it's not butter she first blamed it on I just moved here but she'd been in the apartment for about six months then she told me she just doesn't use any of em stuff when she cooks I asked her once she puts on her food she said she just eats it plain yep doesn't add a single thing to food she cooks not for health reasons either I was pretty horrified I tried to explain at that point it wasn't cooking it was just heating up food that was almost a deal-breaker for me to make things worse I asked for paper towels or a clean sponge to clean up she was very confused why I'd think she owned that sort of thing years and years ago I dated a young woman who admitted that she couldn't tie her shoes at the time I thought a lack of skill in that regard was somewhat strange but it made sense when she explained it to me the girl had only one velcro fastened sneakers as a child and had switched to slip-on footwear once she had outgrown that particular style since she'd never had a reason to learn it knowledge of how to tie shoes had simply passed her by despite the fact that she was completely comfortable tying other knots anyway in an attempt to help the young woman I started giving her opportunities to tie my shoes it only took her a few attempts before she had filled the gap in her skill set but the practice also became a joke of sorts between us unfortunately it drew some strange looks and one curiously angry reaction one evening when while attending a party together I pointed out to her that my shoelace had come undone and she immediately bent over to tie it for me we had to quickly explain the story behind her behavior but a handful of people remained unconvinced the lesson stopped after that TL DR I nearly got myself lynched by helping a girl learn to tie her shoes , unfortunately it drew some strange looks and one curiously angry reaction one evening when while attending a party together I pointed out to her that my shoe had come untied and she immediately bent over to for me see my assumption in that situation would be that you were the one who didn't know how to tie your shoes and she was helping you if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video bye for now [Music]

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 31,554

Rating: 4.7720799 out of 5

Keywords: life skills for teenagers, life skills activities, dating, dating advice, dating stories, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: Njq75GpMdgs

Length: 24min 22sec (1462 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 01 2020