- Sarah gets dressed every day by covering herself in Super Glue and rolling around a Claire's. (people laugh) And it's really great,
the results are there. She looks like a Muppet drug dealer. (people laugh)
(people clap) (bell dings) - Welcome, everybody, to Try Not to Laugh. (people clap) (people cheer) Guys, today is a very bittersweet moment, because Sarah is leaving Smosh. - Aw. - No.
- What? (people laugh) What? No one told me. - I know, I know. So we thought it'd be a fun little way to send you off by forcing you to sit in that stool, and taking a barrage of funny hahas from not just the cast, but also the people that work at Smosh, to bid you farewell in as
painful of a manner as possible. - Yeah. - I am so nervous. I am so nervous. I am always so intimidated
to be on this show, and now, it's all about roasting me, so I'm very, very nervous. - Double duty. - Yeah, it's not so much a
try not to laugh challenge, it's gonna be frickin'
try not to cry, baby. - Be careful, 'cause I'm going first, and I'm gonna pinch you. (people laugh)
- Uh-oh. - Eh. - So, if you guys wanted to know more about why is Sarah leaving, we did a little special podcast. We'll link to it. Check it out. Give it a like.
- There's definitely tears in that one. - Aw.
- Yeah. - There's definitely tears in that one. - Yeah. - While Sarah prepares herself, why don't you prepare to
hit that Subscribe button? - Do it for me. - Do it for Sarah.
- Do it for them. - And also, for moral support, there is always going to
be one of the Smosh members sitting next to you.
- A couple of us, a couple of us. - A couple people, maybe. - Emotional support friends. - Just to be there for you so you don't feel lonely. - Great, I'm ready to not laugh. - All right. - All right. - Let's do it.
- Yeah, see. - Yeah. - Woo. (fire roars) - Hello, everyone. (Tommy laughs) Today, I am doing a
traditional roast. Why? Because I met Sarah for the first time in a traditional roast, so I'm doing lines, I'm
doing writing, here we go. (Tommy sighs) Sarah Whittle, I'm gonna
miss you very much. What can I say about you? Sarah Whittle, A.K.A. Lisa
Frank with a concussion. (people laugh)
(bell dings) Wait, Sarah, are you directing
Try Not to Laugh right now? Because you're sitting silent in a chair. (people laugh) I'm kidding, I'm kidding, you're a brilliant producer and director who comes up with genius shows like Torture Your Cast with Bikini Wax, Torture Your Cast with Hot Peppers, and Torture Your Audience with Frenemies. (people laugh) (people clap) Oh my god, oh my god, Sarah, are you okay? You've barely posted your
Barefoot Wine ad today. (people laugh)
(Noah claps) Sarah, Smosh will never
be the same without you. Who else will say something
very quietly offscreen for the editors to caption? (people laugh) (Noah claps) Who else will wear clothing so bright that we don't need lighting? (people laugh) And of course, who else
will cast me in videos? Goodbye, everyone, this is my last video. (people laugh)
- Oh. - [Tommy] Bye. - Yay. - But most of all, Sarah is truly the best reference I can put on my resume. - Hey.
(people laugh and clap) Hey, hey, hey. - And, of course, thank you
so much for supporting me, and getting me where I am. I love you so much,
you're the (beep) best. - Ah.
(people clap) (fire roars) - Hey, Sarah, it's me, your doctor. Remember me from a few moments ago? Great. So, before I go over
your results with you, I was reading your form, and it says here, where it
asks if you're sexually active, you put yes, and he's Italian. (people laugh) We know. (people laugh) And then, where it asks
if there's any chance you could be pregnant, you put no because he's Italian. (people laugh)
(bell dings) I don't know what that means. Kind of offensive, but whatever. (Sarah laughs) But, good news, actually, it turns out you're
not lactose intolerant, you just like attention. - Oh.
(people groan) (people clap) - And, you know, there is
some bad news, of course. You know, your colon is wired incorrectly, so it actually comes out of... Have you noticed that you have bad taste? (people laugh and groan) Bad taste, no? Okay. And then, the last thing, it says here that you're a dumb (beep) (people laugh and clap) - What? It said on that paper? (people laugh and clap) Aw, thank you. - I don't have anything
nice to say, but I love you. - Love you. (fire roars) Hm. - Come on, come on. - Oh, see, now, I'm gonna cry. - [People] Aw. - [Noah] Oh, he shakes. - Oh my god, I'm obsessed with Danny. (piano notes jangle) - Okay, ready, Danny? Ready? ♪ Why are you gonna go, why, why ♪ (Noah laughs) ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why, why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why, why ♪ Come on. ♪ Why, why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ ♪ Why ♪ (all howl) (Danny howls) - Yay. (all howl) (Danny howls) (fire roars) Oh no, not a notebook. There's highlighted parts. - [Shayne] You got your mask? - Oh, no, Sarah Whittle. (Sarah laughs) - Sorry.
- Sarah Whittle. - [Man] Mask. - Sarah Whittle. (people laugh) (paper rustles) More like Sarah Wharge. (people laugh and clap) - You look stupid. - It's so good. - [Noah] Wow. Wow. (fire roars) - [Man] So, this is somebody
who couldn't be here, Sarah. - Trench coat's coming on. Rant alert. My coworker Sarah is
actually leaving Smosh. It was because of the
thumbnails I was making. Here are some samples of notes Sarah has given me on thumbnails. (people laugh) (Sarah laughs)
(bell dings) I don't know how TikTok works, so I'm gonna upload this thumbnail for the rest of Smosh videos, and who's gonna stop me? Literally no one. No one can stop me. (people laugh) - Aw. (people clap and cheer) Those were all real notes that I gave. (fire roars) - Hey, just me. So I'm not good at roasts. Like, I can't do it, I'm so bad, but, so, I just decided to give you a nice little
farewell teddy bear, and it's also got a little message in it. (soft piano music) (Courtney grunts) Oops, wait, gotta squeeze it real hard. - [Keith] Yo, Sarah Whittle,
it's me, Keith Leak Jr. You know the voice. Unfortunately, you know,
I can't be there right now because I got cancer. (all laugh)
(bell dings) Now, how in the hell did I get cancer before I got COVID? Sorry, it's not about me, my fault, but, yeah, I wouldn't
miss this for the world, but I am gonna miss you. I'm gonna miss you directing the squad, I'm gonna miss your Caucasian freckles, and most of all, I'm gonna
miss your childish ass outfits, 'cause I know three-year-old Smosh fans spit out breast milk from excitement every time they see what you're wearing. (people laugh) (Keith laughs) Anyways, I would say goodbye, but (laughs) you'll be back. (people laugh) (people clap) - Oh. - [Keith] You know, I
tried to leave Smosh, too, but the Smosh gods just kept calling me. I couldn't resist. But all jokes aside, I love you. Thank you for all the
things you contributed, and see you in a couple months. (Keith laughs) (people laugh) - Aw, that's so cute.
(people clap) Thank you. - I love you. (Sarah laughs) (fire roars) - Sarah, I know that you're
gonna miss a lot of things about Smosh, but the thing
you're probably gonna miss most is all the (beep) up things that I say, and all the facts that maybe
you didn't need to hear that I might find interesting or funny, so I wrote a couple down for you. All cruise ships have a morgue on board. (people laugh) - Oh. - Do you get it now? Yeah. - [Sarah] I heard a different word. - Oh, sorry, yeah, a morgue, yeah, a place where they put dead people. (people chuckle) Atoms are 99% empty space, meaning we are 99% empty. (people laugh) You're 6.7% more likely
to die on your birthday. - Aw. (Shayne laughs) Since the feeling of touching is just the subatomic particles in our skin repelling each other, you can never actually
touch your husband Claudio. (people laugh)
(bell dings) Dentures used to be made from the teeth of dead soldiers. (Sarah groans) (people laugh) And most (beep) up fact of all is that you're leaving us. - [People] Aw. - No, no, no. (people clap and cheer) - All right, we're back. We've got some new roasters in the back 'cause we're back. Are you ready? - Yes, I am ready. - Good, okay.
(Sarah laughs) I don't know how to roast. (fire roars) - If you are a loved one
were ever sent Slack messages from Sarah Whittle, you may be entitled to financial compensation
for your distress. (people laugh) If Sarah has ever asked, "Will
we get in trouble for semen?" or, "Will it's so close to
my balls get us demonetized?" you may be a good candidate
for representation. (Courtney laughs) - Additionally, if Sarah
has reprimanded you for "Chocolate's too spicy," "Chocolate's not spicy enough," (people laugh) "Jumbo playing cards too big," "Normal playing cards too small," (people laugh) "Too many rubber bands
took to explode the milk," "Not enough rubber bands took
to explode the watermelon," (people laugh) we're here for you, give us a call. - Exposure to such messages
may lead to confusion, trauma, and, in some
cases, rage, you know? (people laugh) - Please don't wait. Call
1-800-RED-TRENCH-COAT-TRIGGERS-A-TRAUMA-RESPONSE-99. (people laugh) Again, that number is
1-800-WHAT-THE-ACTUAL (beep) WAS-THAT-MESSAGE-99. (people clap and cheer) (fire roars) (soft piano music) - I just wanted to open with a gift. This just really reads
you, you know what I mean? There you go. - Aw.
- Thank you. - Aw, you act like I bought it. It's ours. (people laugh) That's for you to take. Sarah, I just wanted to open up and just say that I really
appreciated you working with us. Man, from the get go,
when we were all working, stuff was fun, but stuff
was also very stressful. We were working long hours, really tough. The whole crew was there,
everyone who experienced it, and I just wanted to
say, throughout it all, you were never kind of... It might be weird for people, but sometimes, behind the camera, you might wanna get in
front of the camera, but you never made it feel like it was any sort of pressure, anything like that, so I
just wanted to give you, like, a heartfelt, like, thank you. You've been a very awesome team member, and also, you look like every
Disney princess put together trying to be a Fox News host. (people laugh)
(bell dings) Yeah. (people clap) - Wow. - [Ian] He makes heartfelt first. - And you would be hired
if you were blonde. (people groan) (Noah laughs) Sorry. - Glad I'm not blonde. - Yeah, seriously. (fire roars) (people cheer) (people clap) - Sarah. - Mm-hm? - Thanks for inviting me to
do your exit interview here. (people laugh) - Mm-hm. - In front of people and with friends. It's very Sarah of you. (people laugh) So, I also understand you
won't be speaking during this. Challenging. What I'd like you to do, we're trying to prep for your replacement. If you could help us understand, like, what takes a chunk of your day. Use your hands, your fingers. Let me know on a scale from one to five what takes up most of your day, okay? So one is the least, right? Five is the most. Use the fingers in between. So, let's begin. Emails, emails. One two five. Okay, okay. Pitch meetings, all the
pitch meetings that you run. That makes sense. (people laugh) - It's, like, once a month. - Attempting winged eyeliner at your desk during video calls. (people laugh) Half of one? (people laugh) Okay, I would've thought it
was a lot more, interesting. (people laugh) Tearing up stuffed animals
to make clothes out of. (people laugh)
(bell dings) 10, okay, yes.
(Courtney laughs) That was a big one. Interpreting what Claudio says, and trying to convince
us that it was funny. (people laugh and clap)
(bell dings) I mean, I felt like it was a
big part of my day, but what... (people laugh) Five, five.
- Solid five. - Solid five. Attempting to reclaim missed
areas of your childhood by dressing up like Rainbow Bright. - Aw.
(people groan) (man shouts) - Sarah, let's stay on... Okay, all right.
(people laugh) We can talk after this. I do think that this is
something worthy of a therapist or maybe, you know, not just
talking to me or Matt about. (people laugh) I know this takes up
a lot of my time, too, trying to guess how many wars
Garrett has lived through. (people laugh) It's a tricky one. - So many unsuspecting victims. (people laugh) - Working with the editors to digitally insert Ian into every video. (people laugh) Yeah. Hiring tailors to make sure that Shayne's sleeves fit too tight. (people laugh and clap) It's a big part of the budget, so I know it takes a lot of time. - Five. - Five, that's a five, okay. (Sarah laughs) And then, lastly, and I don't know if this will be helpful with the incoming
director of "Unscripted," but pitching your cats as cast members. (people laugh) The truth is, you know, only one of them is funny. (people laugh) - Right? - We could never afford Tartufo, that's why we keep Damien around. (people groan) How much time, how much time, one to five? - Oh, we'll just do right in the middle. - Okay. Great, perfect, we'll use this information in the future to find a replacement. The truth is, Sarah, I don't know how we'll ever replace you. - [People] Aw. (people clap) - Thank you so much for
giving yourself to Smosh, for teaching me how to
put on magnetic lashes, for being my partner in so many meetings. I will miss you so much. - [Sarah] I'll miss you. (people clap) - [Ian] Oh my gosh. (fire roars) - I'm in kind of an awkward position 'cause, one, I thought we had to, like, specifically volunteer to roast you, so, for most of the week, I didn't think I was in this video, and then, after Courtney's turn, Keith took most of my material. (people laugh) So, I am going to be roasting you, one, as a character, and two, making up stuff that's just not true, it's not really about you. (Damien clears throat) So, here we go. Sarah Whittle is so stinky, (people laugh) I drove to the dump and tried to smell it, and I couldn't, and I looked around to find why, and it's
'cause you were there on a frequency exactly opposite amplitude to the smell of the dump, canceling out all the smell. Second joke. (people laugh) Sarah Whittle is so horny (people laugh) that, the moment she saw Claudio, she said, that's the man I'm gonna marry, and when he arrived in four to six weeks, (people laugh)
he had no other option. - Bro. - There are many ways people can tell you that they have cats. I dress in black, so
it's a visual way to see, but since you look like a
Beanie Baby from Chernobyl, you just won't shut the
(beep) up about 'em. (people laugh) None of those are real, it was all just a character. - Yeah. - Sarah, I love you very much. - I love you so much, Damien. (people clap)
- Aw. (fire roars) - You probably know Sarah as the host of "Spelling Bikini Wax," but many of you also know her as the bumbling idiot
on "The Price is Right." (people laugh) Sarah gets dressed every day by covering herself in Super Glue and rolling around a Claire's. (people laugh) And it's really great,
the results are there, she looks like a Muppet drug dealer. (people laugh)
That's fun, that's really fun. You know, in case you were wondering what it would be like if
Bjork were an influencer, we have it.
(people laugh) Sarah Whittle went to middle school at Bitburg in Germany, and she went to high school at Cheyenne East High School in Wyoming. We actually tried to reach out to some of her former
classmates to be here, but none of them remembered you. (people laugh)
(bell dings) You left zero impression. (people laugh) They couldn't fathom
that you ever existed. (people laugh) And Sarah Whittle
married an incredible guy from Italy named Claudio. He's the best guy, he's
literally the best. Hey, what do you call an
Italian guy in Wyoming? Moose-olini. (people groan) We're having fun here,
we're having fun here. - Having fun. - Sarah Whittle is the human embodiment of a pack of scratch offs. (people laugh and groan) Fun fact.
(Sarah laughs) - It makes sense to me. - It doesn't. Fun fact, Sarah Whittle
is lactose intolerant. She is also a member of ISIS. (people laugh) Sarah Whittle competed in the Miss Arizona USA 2014 competition, which is super impressive. I mean, you competed in a beauty pageant. That's right, Sarah
Whittle is an Arizona 10. (people laugh and clap) And a New York five. And a California roll. (people laugh and clap) Seriously. - California roll. (people laugh) That's good. - Sarah, you made me cry at my graduation, and I think I'm gonna cry again here. - Oh, you cry, I cry.
- Seriously, for real, you have no idea. This channel would not be here if it wasn't for Sarah. 'Kay, don't cry, don't cry. Seriously, you've been so crucial. Like, it's been close
to disappearing before. We've been at 50,000 views. That's not good for this, and you brought it back. So many ideas have come from you. You are such a crucial part of the identity of Smosh, and you always will be, and you're one of my best friends, so I'm gonna miss you. - I love you. (Courtney shouts)
(people clap) (fire roars) - Oy-yoi. - [Man] Only got one more. - One more. - Is this the last one? - Do we have one more?
- Hey. (people cheer) - My friend, last one. Do you need a second? Just take your time. - Yes.
(Courtney laughs) - Take your time. It's about you. - I know, this is gonna (beep) me up. - No, no. So, I read the call sheet wrong, and I thought this was a boast, because I know how weird you are with people making fun
of you on the internet, so I had a bunch of nice things to say, but I'm gonna wing it, I'm gonna wing it. I think I got a couple good
things that are mean, too, 'cause roasts are fun, right? - Yeah.
- Yeah. - Sarah, you are hands down one of the most creative and original minds I've ever had the
pleasure of working with, but you look like if (beep) (people laugh)
(bell dings) - [Courtney] Oh, oh. - Balance. (people laugh) - Range, some people would say. - Being by your side,
both on camera and off, for the last five years has been some of the best memories of my career. You (beep) (people laugh) I have watched you grow
from a celebrity gossip host to being one of the creative minds that have molded one
of the biggest channels on the internet today, and I don't think you
ever got enough credit. (beep) (people laugh and clap) I grew up with five brothers, but my relationship with you over the past five years has given me the opportunity to know what it's like to
simultaneously love someone and want to (beep) murder them at the exact same time. - Yeah.
(people laugh) - There's no joke, it's just, straight up, sometimes, I wanna (beep) kill you. (people laugh and clap) - Ditto. - Last, on a personal note, it is no secret what I have been through over the past couple years, and, without your kindness and seemingly effortless caring, I don't think I ever would've made it to finally be (beep) so thank you so much. - Oh my god.
(people laugh) (people clap) - We love you, I love you so much. (fire roars) - Guys, this has been the
roast of Sarah Whittle. (people clap and cheer) My roast was Keith's roast, so I'm just gonna say right now, you are the best ref, sorry, the best director, and you
were such an amazing person to look up to, and feel
so trusting in you, and I just look forward to all the people that
get to experience that with you in your future, and I love you very much. - I love all of you guys so much. - Yeah.
- We love you, Sarah. - We love you, Sarah. - Love you, the journey's
not quite over yet. We also have our podcast saying
goodbye to Sarah Whittle, more crying, a lot more,
a lot more to the story, so go ahead and click that
if you'd like to watch it. Also, we have merch. Ha-ha, I'm gonna promo our merch. - Yeah, do it. Merch, merch, merch, merch, merch, merch, merch, merch, merch,
merch, merch, merch, merch. I just wanna say thank you guys so much. It is so sweet that
all of you guys did it. Thank you to the Smosh community. It's been life changing. This has been the most
enriching, fun playground, and I couldn't have done it with all of your guys's support. Like, you say that I did a lot, like, we're all in it together. I needed each of you guys,
and each of your spirit in my heart so that we could
all level up and be better, so thank you guys so much. More of this in the podcast, and if you wanna keep watching, we have more videos here. (people laugh) There's a video there, video there. Look at them.
- Yeah, videos. Content 'til we die.
I’m honestly glad that Matt Raub had the courage to be apart of this video. And that his love for one of his best friends transcended whatever potential hate he’d get online. And no matter how you feel about him for whatever reason, I think we can all appreciate that and let this stay something nice for Sarah and her coworkers and friends and people she considers family.
This video was so sweet and so cute. And I hope she has the best of times on her adventures. Smosh will certainly be different without her, but as with Anthony hopefully they can evolve and rise to the challenge. This makes everything so surreal though too as all the cast/crew members grow and potentially change. Kinda scary to think about who would follow suit in the future. Sorry ramble over. Just so. Many. Damn. Emotions! Lol