Trouble In Paradise (2 Hour Reddit Compilation)

spouses and partners of reddit what red flags are you glad you ignored how she'd worry over the smallest things anything that went wrong dentist food going off traffic not having enough time to wash her hair would send her into a panic and put her in a foul mood that could last for hours i'm the exact opposite completely laid back if the dentist doesn't have good news i'll accept it and not worry if food goes off i'll pop down to the shops and grab some more and if we're late because of traffic that's just how it goes i thought her moods would be the thing to end us to slowly wear down my patience to a point where i'd stop trying to comfort reassure and calm her down i was wrong reader i've never been happier and we're good for each other i can calm her down and she can make me care about things i didn't used to think were a big deal but ultimately are we work so well together first date he had a man cheat on his truck seat and two ropes on the floor i'm sorry i've been to the ranch and i was cutting weeds little did i know there were also two shovels under the back seat he is a biologist and he will hunt down plants my spouse's very weird and unusual sense of humor i was afraid he was mentally unstable he would draw weird cartoons mimic people's voices and mannerisms creepily accurate and tell the craziest stories it turns out he's just freaking hilarious and he usually keeps me belly laughing once a week i have a very dark sense of humor darker than most i'm very thankful my husband finds it cute because most find it weird and i'm sure revolting sometimes this just let me know most people no matter their quirks are going to find someone who will enjoy and embrace their weirdness when i met him my husband had just closed his comic book store i had a few people who didn't know him at all tell me that he was a loser because he had a comic book store and that type never does well in life i knew his store closed for reasons out of his control business partner for cancer sold the store to pay for treatment and that he was seriously depressed about it no one else seemed to see the man i did and i felt like i was stealing him legit the most generous kindest funniest smart butt dude i've ever met i'm glad i ignored them because i doubt i could find a better partner in life there's been a lot of crap thrown at us but we have navigated it together i love him and despite how much the rest of my life sucks my marriage is resilient and healthy when i met my wife and we became more and more intimate she opened up to me and told me she didn't want to have secrets from me she then proceeded to tell me the story how she had spent some time in a psychiatric clinic recently and what she had been through i was a little bit scared first but she managed to convince me that she had made a full recovery she told me she went full jackpot with me and risked me getting up and leaving her but she didn't want to build our relationship on a lie we have been married for 15 years now and she's the love of my life that's a green flag that's called honesty probably the most important trait since it basically negates most the bad ones i ignored all the huge red flags about his family they were loud overbearing oversensitive negative and narcissistic my husband's none of those things i literally told him after meeting them that i never knew families like his really existed thought it was some exaggeration or dramatic trope fortunately nearly 15 years later my in-laws are all cut off or dead and we have zero family drama the moral here is killing your in-laws equals zero family drama i mistook my husband's relaxed attitude with not caring nope he really is that easy going now i love his even temperament sometimes is annoying but is mostly calming this is me calm and relax af my girlfriend is a fricked up hurricane but we do love each other lol best of luck to both of you he had a side gig as a puppeteer and used to use the plastic eyes from second-hand stuffed animals for the puppets so when i met him i found a bag of eyeless stuffed animals i made him show me the puppets for proof before getting over it he's the best though and we've been married for over a decade with the family the serial killer room i went home with him for the first time to a completely blank room no personal possessions white bed spread and pillows the windows had bars on them i gave him a cool picture for his walls didn't get murdered and been living together two years now he's just tidy we are the complete opposite i love to flit around not staying anywhere too long and live in the short term without any kind of planning on impulse she hates the idea of being without a long-term plan and knows exactly what she wants to do with the rest of her life she has managed to help me sort out some kind of realistic path for the rest of my life our lives and i've managed to get her on a rough planned tour of sea asia keep going till the money runs out we have managed to develop the parts of our personalities that made life difficult for us and each individually blossomed as a pair we are currently on our way to malaysia and i've managed to stash a ring in my backpack she makes me excited for the rest of my life as a malaysian do it in panka or penang or langkawi they are all great places to pop the question penang has dope food charcoal assam laksa sandal you should go there if you have the chance and good luck i was always told to date a man that treats his mom right and is a family man because i could expect him to treat me the right way my so hates his moment has always been private about his family we celebrate seven years together next month and i've never regretted looking past the family thing both of our families were worried the seven year age gap would be a big hurdle to overcome i was 20 and she 27 11 years together and five years married it's never been an issue hey i'm seven years older than my husband that's the same exact age we met too love this story i thought he was too rigid the way he runs his life he has his routines and follows a schedule for everything four years and some later as it turns out eating home-cooked meals and going to bed at 11 and waking up at 7 every day does wonders to your health my partner had a string of crazy ex-girlfriends which is usually a massive red flag turns out he has really low self-esteem and ended up with these awful girls because he didn't think he deserved any better he'd keep trying to work on the relationship where i'd be on the point most people would bail after them gaslighting cheating burning his belongings etc i'm so glad i ignored that red flag he's the sweetest guy in their crazy was completely not his fault beyond poor judgment dating them in the first place lol okay but how do we know that you're not all so crazy she doesn't like pancakes it is still annoying and she says i should just make them for myself but i'm like how am i gonna make pancakes for one person gord she is super great though so i'm over it she wouldn't organize for me to meet her family it's two years in we're now married and i still haven't met them but it's okay i've met her friends and for her they are her family so that's all okay in my book i thought she was too sensitive especially since i'm the complete opposite of that she brings joy and excitement to my life and i wouldn't change a thing now bit of a twist in that i was the partner with all the red flags my now husband was pretty against dating someone with mental health issues when we started going out due to bad past experiences i've got bipolar disorder and a history of abuse that left me with a screwed up relationship with sex in retrospect i was the opposite of what he was looking for but he stayed because he realized i was working my tea off to get better and he's still amazed at the progress i've made i think he realized that mental illness and trauma are not necessarily red flags if the person with them isn't using you as a crutch good for you working on your mental health is such a challenge but also so rewarding keep up the good work and good for your partner for being such a good person for understanding and being supportive my boyfriend came on to me really fast and strong which i've always been told was a red flag asked me out three days after meeting me told me he loved me a week later wanted to get married after four months turns out whirlwind romances do exist because we're perfect for each other and still going strong five years later i was the weirdo i knew about my husband the day after we got together for our one night stand i told him straight out that i thought it was love and that i wasn't freaking around was he in or out thankfully he said he felt the same way actually i said i was too old to be freaking around i was 22 in hindsight that is way younger than it felt at the time 16 years together next week my dad always told me i don't care who you bring home as long as they have their own drill i come from a family of woodworkers with a lot of diy experience my partner doesn't have his own drill bill he was absolutely amazing in every other way so my dad loved him right from the start despite this egregious fault i like it i have over a dozen drills he had severe depression no job had dropped out of uni lived at home with his parents and on meeting him clearly autistic he's freaking wonderful the kindest gentlest man i've ever met he works so hard to overcome so much all the time despite it being so difficult for him he supports me through everything unquestioningly put in hours of effort to help me through my degree and professional exams and when i was pushing for promotion he always has time for me no matter what we've been together 80 years married for six years he got his degree through distance learning and is now doing a master's and has a job he achieved so much and he just needed some love and support to get there i'm so freaking lucky to have him as a guy in a similar position minus the autism this gives me hope thanks for that my wife for as long as i've known her has been incredibly driven always organized has an action plan and a backup plan for everything definitely a lot more mature than i am probably ever be but she's a very typical type a person i'm the complete opposite of that go with the flow no organization procrastinate nearly everything i did while we were dating i was really worried that she'd leave me because of how i am personally however we both complement each other really well she makes sure i'm accountable for what needs to be gets done and helps me stay on track and as she puts it i reminded her to have some fun now and again i'm really fortunate to have her in my life and that she accepts me for who i am through all of my quirks i met him on the internet and he's older than me met online when i was 12 and he was 15. he lived across the country met up in person when i was 16 and he was 19. got together after that and married this year we're now 24 and 27 glad i ignore don't meet strangers online however i am an advocate for being safe online when we met in person i met him with 10 of my friends just in case he was a murderer when on our second date he was super nervous and giving me some real timid guy vibes he was doing this thing where he would look at me and nervously bite his lip at the time i had only ever dated super macho very confident men it was a real turn off and i distinctly remember thinking ugg okay just get through this date best decision ever 6.5 years later he is my husband and the best thing that ever happened to me he is just the best thing in the world and i couldn't give a crap about those type a guys i used to go for i'm so glad i ended up with him because he's exactly what i need he's way braver and more confident in himself than the kind of men i thought i was into and his lip biting thing when he's nervous is rare and super cute i really love my husband gonna go tell him again i can relate when i met my future husband he came off as shy and kind of goofy he told my friend i'd met a guy who was nice but not really my type which was type a guys best advice she gave me was maybe you've been chasing the wrong type 10 years and two kids later wouldn't exchange him for anything he's so much kinder and stronger than i thought i deserved i was worried that the gap between our family's wealth would be an issue lower middle versus upper middle it probably would have been if i were with her sister he doesn't like cheese at all i freaking live for cheese but it's okay more for me everything for me to be exact i don't like cheese either my husband is weirdly protective about it he will tell the pizza place four times and that one has no cheese on it it is very important that it does not have any cheese but he never has to worry about me eating his food my fiance's previous marriage we met on tinder and at the time we were both fairly young i was 23 he was 25 and i wasn't really looking for anything serious i had a habit of discounting people with what i presume might be baggage like ex-wives or kids although he doesn't have any because it wasn't anything i felt ready to take on however we really hit it off and he was always very upfront about the situation from day one so i decided to roll with it we've been together 3.5 years are engaged and are now expecting our first child together he spent an hour of our first day talking about the elaborate way he planned to kill himself turns out that nobody had ever really listened to him including his ex-wife and he was feeling hopeless and invisible once he had a chance to talk some stuff through his depression quickly faded and he's been the best husband and co-parent i could ever want for 13 years now bold strategy that really seems more like second or third date material her three kids at first i was like hey i don't know about this all it took was one hug and it changed to okay i can live with this reminds me of my dad he married my mother when she had four children all age five or under you are the best type of people my husband is six years older and had been in a pseudo pseudo-long-distance open relationship this girl lived in another state and essentially had him on reserve as her vocation boyfriend on her family's three-plus trips to his town each year i confirmed what the situation was with the right people and took my time to ease into asking him out and made it clear that i was interested in a serious relationship unlike the other girl's firm nothing serious routine essentially i snatched my husband off another girl's hook lol dang he wasn't known for long relationships i thought he couldn't wouldn't keep anyone he is just a very unique personality that i love many girls found that annoying and left been together two five years been kind of friends since seven she wanted us to not tell people we were dating wondered whether that was a red flag about and whether she would be willing to commit to a relationship a few months later we made it public and we are now married turns out she felt that i could be the one and didn't want to jeopardize it by having people gossip i just turned 18 when we met and he was 24. we also happened to meet two months before i was leaving for college four hours away but the long distance sucked and my parents weren't huge fans of the age difference but the next fall semester he decided to follow me and we both graduated in july it's been four one stroke two years since we started dating and we're about to move in together edit my parents don't care anymore about the age gap they love him and keep asking when the wedding is my boyfriend is nine years older than i am lol i kinda like the age gap even if my coworkers don't understand it my family had no problems with it though when i first met him i thought he was one of those people who was too cool to like things and a bit negative turns out he's the sweetest most caring and most romantic person i've ever met i'm so lucky i gave my number to a good looking guy who approached me in a bar and forgot about it around 2 a.m that night i got drunk dialed by someone i thought was my male housemate he identified himself with that name and said he was standing outside and to please let him in because it was cold my housemate at the time did have a habit of locking himself out and doing hilarious dumb crap while drunk i went outside and saw nothing i looked up and down the street while the guy on the phone insisted he was there after talking to him some more i realized the guy on the phone wasn't my roommate but the guy i had given my number to earlier that night he just had the same name as my housemate he was just massively drunk he'd lost his wallet and keys later that night he cabbed home without realizing he had no wallet and the cab driver called the cops on him in front of his building apparently he'd just gotten out of a terrible relationship and was drinking himself into a stupor i was single and bored and had nothing better going on and he seemed like a nice enough guy i let all this slide when he told me about it on our first date including his recent cheating girlfriend we've been married for four years now and have two kids together drinking heavily and being stupid is not something i've seen him do since the night we met the situation with his ex just really messed with his head he sounds nice i can't really blame him go drinking in that situation he was kinda creepy at first and i had to stop him i felt like he had too many emotional issues i didn't want to deal with and our friendship really deteriorated but then when he gave me the space i needed to heal from a past relationship and i opened my mind to give him a chance our relationship became really beautiful he's an absolutely beautiful person he's the best boyfriend ever we've been together for two years now he's so considerate and loving he was just very awkward and truly didn't know what was expected from him he is the sweetest and i'm so happy that is sweet wishing you guys another happy two years one of my best friends in college claimed my girlfriend was a succubus made life a bit difficult since he was also my roommate two years later he had a brain tumor removed my wife and i have been together now for 16 years and have a beautiful daughter didn't ever meet her parents one year and two months later she finally opens up her shell and tells me that they died in a car accident days before we met i thought he was way too clingy and loved stuffed animals a lot and a little too attached to stuff he turned out to be a guy with a big heart who taught me a lot about caring for people who mellowed out a lot he's working on the sentimentality and having too much stuff he likes having space for living in two i'm late but i want to share anyways in the beginning he came on way too strong he immediately approached me at every event he saw me if i would catch a glimpse of him i knew he would be standing around me within no time sometimes not even talking to me just joining the people i was with and standing there listening beaming my friends would make jokes about it and make bets of how long he could bear to wait until he came over once at a pub quiz he got our team disqualified because he kept excitingly joining in but we already had too much people he tried hard to spend time with me when i would tell him i was too busy with an assignment he would suggest a homework date not getting any hints and just genuinely being excited that we found something we could do together for some reason he would show his affection by fixing small things in my room around him like neatly rearranging my cables while we talked at our first official date going out for a drink he would talk non-stop about himself and about his ex that he had broken up with just the month before that was a red flag and him being all over me was too i turned him down but by then i had already started to get fond of him and that grew during the months when i had some space to reflect on it then when i was with someone else and i found him too drunk at some party he tapped on my shoulder and he said to me something like hey i am ready to go home now his best friend immediately took over because my date was with me and took him home but him saying that made me realize that i actually wanted to be the one to take him home and reassure him now together for almost two years taking him home ever since have never won any pub quizzes again and have excellent cable management now 10 stroke 10 can recommend it's amazing how that one drunk moment made you realize how much he meant to you the morning after we first met we met at a party and i'd stayed over he told me fully serious that he wanted to be a bear he also told me that morning how he only likes hoodies with one front pocket because it makes him feel like a kangaroo mama really weirded me out that was the kind of thing he'd tell someone he basically just met turns out that said a lot more about his honesty than anything else he is the kindest most generous rational and caring man i've ever met and just the right amount of weird for me kangaroo mama my wife has a flirty personality that dudes and chicks like really fast i was jealous out of my freaking mind for the first few years angry shaming her controlling something clicked in me where i figured out that she's a human living her own life with me our marriage couldn't be more sexy and strong we couldn't be more in love the last seven plus years it stemmed from me being jealous about girlfriends when i was younger it's just how i operated it turns out being jealous and controlling makes you a miserable person to be around i realized why do i deserve control once you ask yourself that question you realize why you're in butthole my wife never said this to me by the way this was a personal journey and once you can figure out that no one deserves control over another person you become a more confident in controlled person yourself which then attracts other confident in control people it's basically win-win a lot of these answers such as yours are making me realize how many amazing self-reflective people with massive capacity for growth there are out there this is really nice to read your sos are as lucky to have you as you are them we started our relationship hurting from our past relationships we swore up and down that we would be friends with benefits and nothing more cause frick relationships lol three months into this fun time i decided i liked him and wanted to be more he told me twice he looked at me as a friend told myself rick this guy i'm not getting hurt again and stopped talking to him if i hadn't decided to return that message and see him one more time and say yes to being his girlfriend we won't have eight awesome years together and celebrated our five-year-old daughter's day three this could be a judd apatow movie that releases during christmas week she's asexual and i'm a very sexual person i completely overlooked it on her online profile when we first started talking and when i realized my mistake i wasn't sure what to do she was smart funny a great conversationalist and beautiful inside and out but i worried if i was always wanting something she couldn't provide didn't that mean our relationship would be doomed right from the get-go when i agreed to meet with her i wasn't sure it was a good idea i didn't know what to expect but she was every bit as much a kind and amazing person in the flesh as she was in text also i found out my conception of asexual was a bit oversimplified it turns out she can have sex and under the right circumstances can even enjoy it but does not become sexually attracted to people or desire it in the years since she has been nothing short of a dream i love her as a person and thoroughly enjoy our physical relationship too i can't imagine my life without her what is the most romantic thing you have done for someone that has either backfired or was not received well by the person you did it for i worked with this girl at a ruby tuesdays and for her birthday we all went out for drinks we were all friends and i think she knew i liked her at the time though i hadn't made movie yet she put off this rock of vibe tattoos colored hair loved 80s hair metal and rock music in general so for her birthday i decided to burn her a cd of all of my favorite songs from the band the kills because lead singer alison moshed kinda reminded me of her and i thought that their music would be right up her ally so i burned the cd on my computer decorated the cd cover with sharpie made it look really cool i wrapped it up with fancy wrapping paper and a bow and gave it to her at the end of the night i didn't wait for her to unwrap it partly because i was still nervous about her reaction to my gesture and partly because i didn't want to put her on the spot while we were out amongst friends i figured she would just let me know if she liked it at work the following week and i would use that as an opportunity to ask her out cut to next week there was a day that i was often she was working and so was a close buddy of mine from high school i come in the following day for work and he pulls me aside and says dude you should just forget about her he goes on to tell me she had basically crap talked my gift saying i can't believe he did that i don't even like the kills my friend and i are really tight and he's very outspoken and defends me saying are you kidding me you should be so freaking lucky that anyone gives a crap about your birthday at all when i heard about that incident it killed any interest i had in her she never even thanked me for the cd at all she just never mentioned it and i moved on glad you had a good friend on your side at least any friend that stands up for you when you're not around is one worth keeping for sure my girlfriend at the time had this friend who passed away so i went out and bought chinese sky lanterns little hot air balloons pretty much we wrote messages to her friend on them and launched them in the sky from my backyard hers careened right into a tree and almost set the whole dang thing ablaze why send a lantern when you can sacrifice a tree i took my ex to paris had the whole weekend planed we went to the eiffel tower at night had a picnic basically did it all she dumped me two weeks later she said i wasn't romantic enough and didn't tell her i loved her enough when we were in paris okay she wanted to break up before the trip 100 had a girlfriend come live with me after being in a not so great situation for nearly a year in another state was planning for eight months to have a dress she had been dying to get waiting for her under the christmas tree when she arrived because she hadn't had the cash for groceries let alone a nice dress so she got super excited when she saw the box and opened it right away i bought the wrong dress literally whisper the word sweet nothings into my new girlfriend's ear whispering sweet nothings is a saying or general term used to describe a set of compliments or words intended to flatter or woo a lady this was my attempt to be sexy romantic in a humorous sense at the very least i thought she would find it funny i thought wrong however i was unaware that this was something her ex used to say do on the regular so i did not come off sexy or romantic but actually repulsed her since i reminded her of him at that moment try nasty everything booked a spontaneous romantic trip to paris for my girlfriend in college during a long weekend apparently we both get grumpy as heck on long flights and basically spent the weekend fighting so not worth the little money i had that's why i drink heavily then pass out for nine hours on long flights made a huge plan to ask my crush to prom made signs to her house asking her but didn't put up a name saying who did it well turns out her neighbor had a crush too and took credit for it she said yes to him nobody believed i did it and they're now married that's a little rough on the bright side it seems you have a gift for unintentional matchmaking so that's something i got painting lessons for a girlfriend because she was getting into painting she took it to mean that i thought her painting sucked she never took the lessons and i never got my money back sounds to me like she was the one who thought her painting sucked i emptied my wardrobe cabinet and filled the cabinet portion of it and placed on the shelf flowers chocolate a stuffed bear and numerous candy that she loved when i told her to get my hoodie out of the cabinet she opened it and said it's not here and then proceeded to close the cabinet welp did a large portrait of my eye at the time girlfriend we had been fighting and had not spoken in a few day and i decided to do something i thought would be romantic and drew a portrait from my favorite photo of her she got mad and said it made her look like crap gee thanks after the date i dropped her off in the parking lot where her car was parked we said goodbye and no kiss it was our first date she got out and began walking across the parking lot and i suddenly got the courage to whip my car around stop right in front of her get out and kiss her in my head it was like something out of a film in person i pulled up to her forgot to put it in park got out walked away from the car she looked at me horrified and pointed i turned around and ran towards my car as it slammed into another parked car just a typical day in my life really decided to make a bold move with a close lady friend invited her over for a home-cooked meal on valentine's day in my crappy college apartment since neither of us were seeing anyone pretty smooth right i thought so so i cook a pork loin and some pasta something or other and purchased an expensive 12 bottle of wine she'll be here any minute i kept telling myself at around 9 00 pm i texted her she let me know that she assumed the invite was a joke she did eventually sheepishly show up we are now married and i remind her of this every valentine's day i got my very anxious and over stressed ex so a package of three deep tissue massages to her place that we had gotten a couple's massage from her first massage ever and she really enjoyed it a few months later it was reported on the news that the owner proprietor of that spa was molesting and threatening women while giving them massages in eighth grade i tried to hop over a little mini fence by the pay area to impress the boy i liked needless to say i did not make it and instead ripped the whole back of my pants exposing my prepubescent butt to my fellow peers while also falling forward and smacking my face into the concrete below the fence needless to say when the boy expressed his disinterest about me to his friends i was not surprised you went face down but up that one is on him not me bit my boyfriend and at first i hated it but it really grew on me seven years ago he promised a mini weekend getaway a romantic picnic at a secluded beach and afterwards an intimate view of the sunset at first he came to pick me up about two hours late later i found out he was busy preparing everything for the picnic we drove there but luckily for us a fourth grade class trip arrived we quickly tried to find a place somewhere else when we found a spot my boyfriend told me to go ahead alone i look back and see him pulling an enormous cooler barely budging because of the heavy load when i go over to him the cooler tips over and all the ice and contents fall in the sand he quickly starts shoving everything back inside cursing under his breath and saying sorry over and over the section of beach we found was dirty the water looked like sludge and there was graffiti all over the rocks behind us the drinks and fruits were covered in sand and the sandwiches had water in them from the cooler we later realized there was sewage in the water which was why there was a horrible smell and a disturbing amount of flies needless to say we didn't wait till sundown he didn't have money to buy anything else because he spent it all on ice and drinks i paid for our burger king meals i hated it i thought it was the worst experience ever but later i went home and realized how hard he tried to make my first real summer date special seven years later we're still going strong omg or i've been there and done that you have no idea how terrible you feel being the boyfriend in that situation seen a year in high school i had a girlfriend who i had been going out with for a while with graduation getting close and us having different plans for our futures things were getting tense and our relationship was getting rocky there were really tall cliffs over the lake in the town i lived in our first official date was there and in the early days we spent a lot of dates there at those cliffs when we were rocky we hadn't gone to them in a while so as a way to like revitalize our relationship i decided to go there with her it was really still and there was fog over the lake it's a great lake so it's massive and it was unusual for there not to be at least some waves we were sitting on the beach under the cliffs she seemed happy and asked why i had wanted to come here i explained my reasoning to her i looked over to her and her face was in her hands she said she wanted to break up so yeah that was rough but it's been a few years so now i can look back at it and laugh i thought this was going to end with someone falling off a cliff so at least you both survived to celebrate out fifth valentine's day together i was going to replicate our crappy first meal together over candlelight it was banquet chicken patties with marinara sauce and mozzarella melted on top with pasta and a dull bag salad in the days leading up to it when she asked what i was going to do i told her make a special meal she laughed and said probably just make the same food we did years ago or something dumb so needless to say i went to plan b i used to write my boyfriend once on it per week about how much i love him i called him to tell him i got into the writing program at my university he told me he'd been seeing someone else for two years that he hated my writing and ripped up all of my poems on the phone for me to hear what and butthole i hope you've moved on walking around at recess with my life or death crush christina in fifth grade i'd been planning this moment for weeks she was a small girl i told her she reminded me of strawberry shortcake she asked why and i responded because you're short and sweet she did not respond and i'm still dead inside it's cool you'll probably recover by the time you're in sixth grade this is one i just remembered while scrolling through these replies my entire high school career i was goth always wearing band tees and combat boots really grungy it was just my style and i liked it i liked a guy who was friendly but didn't seem interested so i decided to come to school one day dressed pretty with pink lipstick and a skirt and normal boots i thought for sure he'd see me as an ugly duckling turned swan everyone laughed i was teased all day about my makeup the girls were whispering about how dumb i looked for trying to dress like them the guy i liked didn't take notice and started dating another girl in my class and surprisingly carrie was my favorite book man this hurt to read i was one of those girls in high school who wasn't concerned with my appearance at all and i didn't get teased for it too often but as soon as you show that you're trying to put effort into it kids are ruthless my ex and i were to get married in 18 days and we were really stressed out about the wedding so i left work early got a bunch of things cooked dinner set up a little scavenger hunt of memories to remind her of why we're together which then led her to the dinner table with her favorite meal with candles she then broke up with me lied about why she did it and i found out a few weeks later that the reason we were having trouble was not wedding related it was because she was with someone else oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh spoiler not fun at all i booked a weekend at a nice resort up north after the first decent snowfall of the year and one of the options was a sleigh ride i thought it would be like a hallmark card couldn't have been more wrong first of all it's way below freezing but we were dressed for it the horse had constant gas for the duration of the trip also that horse doesn't give a crap that we're there he's clipping trees farting hitting rocks all in a sleigh with no suspension whatsoever hold on this is where it usually tips over our guide says as if bouncing around on solid wood behind the fart machine wasn't bad enough now it's apparent that we can just fall over anytime it's not that uncommon though i've never seen it on a hallmark card we came back cold tired and in pain you know what's more fun that a ride on a one-horse open sleigh drinking inside in front of a fireplace or anything anything is more fun thank you for sharing i laughed i once had a car break down at the very beginning of my relationship with the girl of my dreams however me being underage couldn't rent a car but i could rent a u-haul for just 20 a day and put a few dollars for extra mileage i rented a u-haul and was on my way to her house to pick her up for what promised to be the most awkward date of her life until i pulled up that is for you see once i arrived i saw her family moving boxes from storage and they had a lot of stuff like a lot and they saw me pull up in a u-haul and thought i was just the greatest help so i instead had to help them all day with boxes no date for me but we're engaged now so yep in a thread full of depressing stories i'm really glad you posted this i went on a date with my girlfriend to a bridge on a river that turned out to be the first date with her really crappy ex and if that wasn't enough as we left we walked by a load of druggies dealing h here sweetie i bought you some dope to help you forget about him cooked valentine dinner for an ex back in like 2002 was making some chicken put it in a pot to cook me and girl hang out while cooking get a little preoccupied afterward i think oh crap the chicken run to kitchen naked go to grab lid off apparently i used my roommate's pressure cooker i didn't know what a pressure cooker was but i do now i forced the lid open and got boiling water all over my stomach arms and crotch spent valentine's day in a getting burns treated an even hotter evening than you expected i surprised my fiance at her work with a bouquet of flowers she thought it was creepy and told people i snuck into her work and security had to change the codes i simply walked up to receptionist and said i had a delivery for her and was escorted there turns out she was having an affair with her boss and was gaslighting me to make me look like the bad guy it clicked for me because i always thought the only difference between a creepy gesture and a romantic one is how you feel about the person doing it there was a girl in high school i liked left a note with a rose and a poem on it in her locker next day the principal called my parents and security took me into their office to ask me why i was harassing her embarrassing f bought a bouquet for my girlfriend her mom took a look at them and said they were poisonous girlfriend now thinks i tried to kill her spent a month and a half teaching myself how to make origami roses because she liked origami and was not big on flowers she had said numerous times she thought origami roses were really charming though i hid it from her as best as i could i spent hours on youtube trying to figure this out i wanted to burn my own house down on numerous occasions because of the amount of struggle involved here thought this was going to be romantic af made 12 each with stems and leaves and each one was a different color put them in a bars and presented them to her her reaction was about the equivalent of that's nice pretty much zero appreciation i would also like to point out how ridiculously difficult origami is and i have utmost respect for people that do this proficiently if you are good at origami hats off and i hope it came more naturally to you than it did me i wanted to play in traffic for the duration of trying to learn this it's amazing how something so seemingly simplistic can be so impossible to execute was my girlfriends and i three year anniversary before i left for work i set up a rose petal bed including a flower arrangement and a gift i left work early to pick her up for our dinner reservation when i got to her house she still needed some time to get ready while she gets ready she likes to play music on her laptop so i went to change the song and her messenger app was open with my friend's name at the top it turns out she slept with my friend at my house a few nights prior while i was drunk this actually happened this morning lol i am planning a surprise birthday party for my wife i'm renting a beach house and flying a few of her friends in to celebrate for a weekend my wife handles most of our finances and watches them like a hawk so in order to keep this a surprise i applied for a new credit card to pay for everything we have a pretty good income so i don't expect her to be upset over the amount that will be spent i got the new credit card in the mail and hid it well she found it thought i had a gambling problem or something worse that would require me to hide money i explained why i had it but basically had to give up the surprise bummer dude secret christmas presents would have been a much better excuse bought my wife diamond earrings she opened them and said but they're not the same cut as my ring i can't wear them and now ex-wife that lady sounds exhausting got two rings one with my son and stars and one with moon of my life carved on them we were big game of thrones fans when we broke up i tossed mine into a drawer he gave his to his new girlfriend ouch that hurts my ex and i had necklaces that form together to make a heart with one having i love you engraved on it and i know engraved on the other he put a video on his snapchat story of him burning it in a fire with everything else i gave him fun times i lived in a small country town and we had a huge ice storm that lasted two weeks all the power in the town was out so i'm not exaggerating when i say it was pitch black everywhere it had been a while since my girlfriend and i saw each other due to the entire town being iced over including the roads so on valentine's night i got her a rose and walked miles to get to her through pitch black woods loud winds and what i'm pretty sure i heard was wolves nearby when i gave her the rose she brushed it off like nothing really happened broke up with me the next day and i saw her with another guy later on that she told me not to worry about before my boyfriend sent me flowers at work once the guys in my office all started calling them guild flowers because they weren't sent to me for any particular reason they figured he must have done something wrong i overthought this and made myself believe they were right when my boyfriend got home he found out what happened and never sent me flowers again sorry you work amongst a mature [ __ ] wife and i spent a full day of heavy labor digging in flower beds and planting at our new house that evening after showering both our backs hurt from the effort so i had her lie down and gave her a deep back rub she proceeded to return favor but instead of just using massage oil like i did on her she used icy hot bengay kind of stuff felt great she got bold and had me turn over so she could massage the front of my thighs i of course go to full attention so she grabs it and starts to work on that too using the icy hot stuff all over her hands as lubricant ever put that stuff on your balls word of advice don't it's like a perpetual baseball bat to the nut sack until it wears off an hour later gave my wife a private fire a work show for her birthday on a july 4th when we first started dating it was in the woods at night in an unfamiliar state she thought i was going to murder her i shaved my chest hair in form of her name i thought i was being cute spend the entire afternoon by the pool side with a t-shirt on while she swam like a dolphin with her friends hahaha i'd laugh at you too my so wants to tattoo his last name on his back and i don't understand why it's just tacky i guess lol for me and my husband's first wedding anniversary i did this whole scavenger hunt five senses thing where i got gifts for the five senses i spent weeks scrapbooking the cards together and writing the clues and how they related to the five senses act on top of that i spent prob close to a thousand dollars buying the gifts they included a ps3 or love avatar the last airbender naruto shipping ps3 games naruto and call of duty vape juice taste movies and some other crap i can't remember the morning of i carefully got up super early and hid everything when he got up i had him start he was bored with the scavenger hunt asking why i couldn't just give it to him ended up just showing him where everything was he didn't read the cards the only thing he ever used was the anime and ps3 and he literally complained about it all saying i didn't get the right game or naruto episodes or ishld have gotten the ps4 instead i was devastated never did anything else like that again even since we been separated side note i was pregnant and the only one working as well i flew cross-country to surprise her i had spent weeks working on a model of her aircraft in the air force including painting it with the correct tail number and spending hours getting the crew chief hair color right she was a crew chief left it on her doorstep with a note since i knew she was out figured she would call when she got it she never noticed it and i ended up calling her once she realized i was in town she was pee said she was gonna deck me for trying to surprise her now she is my ex-wife after 14 years i guess i should have known earlier that is such a unique and awesome idea kudos to you for making the effort i was seeing a girl who i really liked she also seemed to really like me as well one day i wanted to buy her flowers as a random act of kindness she told me she didn't want me to buy her flowers okay so a week later i went out to my friend's farm and picked flowers for her instead i was proud of myself with the colors i chosen filling in around the sides it looked like a bouquet you would buy at a store when i saw her that night i showed them to her she proceeded to laugh and call me gay she almost forgot them when she was going home and she just left them in the back seat of her car until they died i stopped talking to her shortly after good riddance my man what has made you nope write the frick out of a sexual encounter went for a facebook booty call a while back her seven and nine-year-old daughters kept walking in and she told me just to ignore them she also insisted on blaring george straight while we went at it between her kids walking in and all my exes live in texas blaring from her speakers i just couldn't do it nope the frick out we were in his car fooling around after leaving the bar together i asked why we couldn't go back his house said his wife was home no he didn't want to wake her up how considerate of him this is my favorite story to tell i'm a type 1 diabetic and my nickname where i'm from is diabetes so everyone knows i have it even though some people would still be like oh you're actually a diabetic anyways i met this girl at a house party one of my friends was throwing this was back in 2010 to 2011 as the night goes on and drinks get consumed we get all love drunk and go to bang it out about halfway through our session she randomly kicks me off and pushes me away stop stop i can't do this i freak out thinking that i have done something horribly wrong what's going on what happens you look straight at me and i crap you not says to me i just i can't catch diabetes all i could think to say was you've got to be freaking kidding me her incredible response and again i swear on my inability to produce insulin i'm not making any of this up this is word for word burned into my memory i just i can't get diabetes it's like cancer i just can't catch it by the time she said cancer i had my pants back on and was running down the stairs i get back to the party and all my friends are like oh look who it is how was it you will never believe what the frick just happened to me tl dr my type 1 diabetes not only [ __ ] blocked me but is apparently an std similar to cancer she wasn't lying she really can't catch diabetes i used to have hepatitis but i swear i'm clean now we had a party at my house w roommates i passed out sitting on the couch i woke up with a raging hard-on and my roommate's wife in only her pink bathrobe was rubbing my dong through my pants while her husband was lustfully watching i jumped up spilled my beer all over myself and went to bed i was about 16 and at this girl's house for a hookup type thing we start getting to second base when she says go away grandpa confused as heck i asked her what she meant she said her grandfather died in the room in the bed we were doing crap on and he was trying to join in with us i nope the frick out of frisky grandpa's house of horrors and never called her again frisky grandpa's house of horrors i'm so glad i scrolled down so far into this thread frick i was a no-bomb person and i don't blame the dude short version i started crying about my ex and threw up i literally never throw up from drinking so that was a weird one for me at least we were in my place and i made it to the bathroom yeah he noped and i cried and begged him not to leave colon after that i decided that drinking with a broken heart is a bad idea holy crap i've done this exact same thing in high school freshman year i dated this girl for about a month when we had sex for the first time she rips off the condom says she want me to drop my seed inside her cause she wants to start a family pulled my pants up and left immediately year later she has a kid with her new boyfriend shivers asked her if she was clean and she said yeah it's a long story but a lot of stuff happened and it turns out that now i can't get stds i thought to myself you know what nah i don't want to have sex that bad and left or she meant there are none left to get because she has them all at the bar one night and it was pretty packed i finally made it to the bar and this definite cougar comes over and starts hitting on me hard i talk her up a bit but play it cool she's not bad looking but not sure if i'm down just yet i finally ask her what she'll have to drink i wanted to just go ahead and buy her the drink so maybe she'd back off a bit since i knew that's what she wanted got her some sugary mixed shot and after she threw it back leaned in lightning fast and laid her lips on me i pulled back after a second as this hot younger chick ran up and screamed mom get out of here you're ruining my night instantly turned around and got away from that fricked up family reunion you did the right thing for sure buu on the other hand you could have also gone for the sportsman's double prior to divorce wife wanted to have unprotected sex out of nowhere after literally six months of refusing to put out and i suspected she was trying to get pregnant to prevent the impending separation not an open hope or she barebacked someone else and wanted you to foot the bill i felt something rubbing against me while i was inside her and after feeling around and there i removed a very gray very soggy old old tampon that was the end of the night you probably saved her a trip to the air super into this guy after a few dates we're at his place we're taking clothes off and he leaves the room to go to the washroom i'm in bed waiting for him to return and feel something in the bed it's a hot dog in a bun clearly a few days old maybe older with the fixings he comes in sees it and my horrified face says he's so sorry he'll get rid of it and proceeds to eat it a a gentleman would have shared a girl i used to date and i were freaking in the dark unbeknownst to me my nose started bleeding i went to grab her tea and they were wet after it took me a little while to realize what was going on but once i did i immediately stopped it was pretty embarrassing as she was covered in blood it was a really hot summer with no ac so apparently she just thought i was sweating intensely finding out that the guy who at the moment had me in a very uncompromising position got off on the idea of forcefully infecting others with hiv i didn't stick around long enough to see if he was actually serious i stopped hooking up for a good long while after that one that's pretty freaking scary got to his place walked into a room and saw that it was completely bare except for a couple of lights and a tarp spread across the floor immediately turned around and walked out the door got in my car and left dunno what the tarp was for he was either going to murder me or wanted me to pee on him either way nope nope nope nope she took off her shoes and the smell could have killed a horse nearly killed me smelled like a hobo in a recycling room the mood was killed i was nearly killed i left both disgusted and concerned pretty girl though almost lost my virginity but didn't because of pokemon i was a teenage virgin in a long distance relationship boyfriend calls says his parents will be out of town and i should come over i scramble trying to figure out what people wear to sex and we didn't even have a walmart in my town to buy lingerie let alone somewhere classy i make the two-hour drive we start making out in his bed get a little hot and heavy and i undress down to my sexiest bra and underwear he gets up and goes to his desk and i assume he's getting a condom which got him huge bonus points because i was a virgin and didn't really know how to ask about stuff like that instead he pulls out a sketchbook beams at me opens to a page and goes see this drawing of charmander i made i say yes and then he comes back to bed and starts flipping through his sketchbook showing me his pokemon drawings while i sit there in my bra and underwear stunned by the turn of events we do this for a good 15 minutes then later he tries to get us started up again but i was just not having it we fell asleep still virgins and woke up to watch power rangers because why the frick not at that point right when this girl i was hooking up with kept talking about how babies brightened her day then she insisted we didn't use a condom wise move my friend had a great first date with this one a blast went back to her place started to hit it dorby she reaches over to her nightstand and pulls out a roll-up pouch unrolls it and pulls out a syringe ask me if i ever tried h insta limp dong i broke the frick out so quick i don't even remember getting dressed i have a few instances i can't think of one while in the middle of losing my virginity after sneaking a boy into my room in the wee hours of the morning he suddenly jumped up and started pacing the floor he really needed to crap so i said the bathroom was immediately outside my door to the right he opened the door and then slams it shut my dad was in the kitchen which was in clear view of my bedroom door he ended up just standing there and crapping himself i'll never forget that smell and i didn't have air freshness so i sprayed some flying insect spray that had a sweet smell to it anyway when the coast was clear i escort him to the bathroom where he gets in the shower i had to make it look like it was me showering therefore i had to sit there in the bathroom while his crappy boxers stunk up the place he gets out puts his boxers in a few plastic bags and changes into fresh clothes then tries to continue the sex i was like uh you can go out the window we still keep in touch on fb and he uses that as a funny story to tell our mutual friends 2. i picked a dude up at a bar who was hands down the funniest person i'd ever met and that was severely attractive to me it also helped that he was severely attractive while going down on me he asked me if i could take some pictures of him with his phone i grab it and as i'm taking the picture his girlfriend sends him a good night text i just hand him the phone and he lets out an exhausted sigh she won't stop telling me she loves me and i don't want lead her on okay kind of uncomfortable but the coat is continues he starts to get very rough with me biting everywhere making my lips bleed calling me a w basically using me as a sex doll which would have been fine if discussed beforehand i don't like to be ambushed then he grabs me by the throat and demanded i told him i loved him freaked me the frick out because of his crazy eyes i had this intense sense of dread that's hard to describe but it felt like in that moment i was in danger so i just pushed him off of me grabbed my clothes completely wordless and literally walked into the apartment complex hallway naked where i got dressed on the stairs three and last but not least the guy who while i was lying naked on his bed waiting for him proceeds to casually pull out a needle from his nightstand and shoots up right in front of me he slid into the floor giggling and i just got dressed and left without him even noticing you win this thread and my sympathy very blatant very obvious genital warts he said there were skin tags be i know warts when i see him i don't need that crap in my butt i don't need that crap in my butt poetic had third date sex things were going well and then as we're lying there she says now that we're in a relationship i need to be the one in charge that means no p and i need to access your facebook account and email so that i know you aren't cheating on me i noped after that one i was on vacation in the dominican shortly after graduating high school with five of my friends met this cute bolivian girl on our resort and we hit it off few hours later i'm in her room we're going at it she repositions onto her hands and knees and tells me to put it in her butt i ask for lube and she hands me a bottle i was giddy with excitement cause i had always wanted to do anal i lather both of this up and slowly slide in but she had clearly done this a few times before now i'm pumping her hard and have thrown caution to the wind we hear a key card go into her door and the handle turn she frantically whispers novio boyfriend and i realize i have about three seconds before i get my butt beat i pull out at lighting speed and she yelps liquid crap sprays all over my stomach and dong i grab my shorts off the floor and run out the balcony door and hop the ledge thank god that room was on the first floor i don't think the guy chased me but i sprinted anyway still very naked and definitely covered in crap i cleaned myself in the ocean and hit the bar i just love the image of her boyfriend coming in and seeing her naked on the bed with a stream of crap all over the mattress i was eating a lady out on her couch when she stopped me she rolled onto the floor and reverse army crawled into her dog's bed and told me to take her there her two cocker spaniels were now awake standing at attention on the side of their bed i note the frick out of that scene i was almost ready to start dating again after a nice long break and after reading this thread i think i'm just going to stay single met a girl at a club and went back to her house everything is going fine nothing out of the ordinary until her housemate comes home i was like maybe we should stop or at least close the door she replies with oh no it's okay he likes to listen and sometimes he watches from the hallway she wasn't joking either i put my clothes back on and walked out and there he was fapping away in the freaking hallway that was her husband dude went to a very alternative punk girl's place for a booty call she said she wanted to take a bath together and i was all for it she goes to run water while i finish my drink we're getting into it and head to the bathroom we strip down and i get in the bathtub and sit down then i looked up at her and she was pulling razor blades out of a cabinet she wanted to cut me and have me cut her nope i've never gone from soaking wet to fully clothed and walking down a sidewalk so quickly in my life i ghosted that girl and have no regrets she started rubbing my chest in the exact same way my ex used to and i realized i was still super in love with her and started to cry so she noped the frick out of there not sure which of you i feel more sorry for it was after a hookup i wanted to leave and he tried to cling on me saying oh please don't go i want to show you to my roommate spoiler alert his roommate was in the freezer in pieces whenever she took her panties off it immediately smelled like eight cans of shark crab told her i needed a cigarette and hit mac 3 out of there i let a woman take me home from a pub here in edinburgh she seemed a little bit sleazy but she had these jacob boobs honestly that had sort of got stuck in my eye and imagination when we got to her place it was about 2am there were like seven kids running around in the flat eating cake and candy and drinking ein brew straight from two liter bottles they were most of them about 12 or less years of age except one sullen 16 17 year old boy who sprawled in a chair staring at me and a dog running around i went to the toilet and there was dog crap in the bathtub the wheels for my mega boob fantasy night had just fallen off the wagon i sort of didn't know what to do at first i didn't want to stay but i didn't want to tell her in front of her little tribe that i wanted to bail and then have to sit there and wait for a taxi to turn up on the outskirts of the city in a housing estate and risk some sort of confrontation that could turn into a horror show so i went to bed and fooled around a little bit and then claimed to be too drunk she drove me home in the morning no way was i getting involved with that scene except one sullen 16 17 year old boy who sprawled in a chair staring at me this part just makes my heart hurt must be so hard for that kid to have a mom like that and he's left to raise his brothers and sisters it was late i was doing the deed with a guy at his place from a hookup app when out of the corner of my eye i see another dude sitting there jerking it i flew out of there wtf we need more details my ex didn't have a condom so he wanted to use a sandwich bag instead i left with so many unanswered questions in my head like did this guy really ask to use a sandwich bag is that thing are people really using sandwich bags as protection during my drunken single heyday i met a woman at a bar during my friend's birthday outing with whom i hit it off we even made out in one of the restrooms sleazy i know we get back to her place and she informs me that her roommate will be home soon turns out he was her on and off again boyfriend who had helped her financially to get through her cancer treatment overwhelmed and quite uncomfortable i decided to bolt despite her insistence after i left her apartment i managed to get myself lost in the building and couldn't find a viable exit i ended up having to crawl out of a window and managed to get out onto the side street near the building i walked toward the main dragon ran into the birthday boy we had a drink and parted ways single life in nyc never gets old this chick who i kinda had a thing for for a long time started making out with me at a party but she was biting my lip and face really hard then she told me she wanted me to freak her in the butt while showing me videos of her boyfriend jerking off went down with my magic fingers and felt some squishy too squishy turns out it was a soaking wad of toilet paper that got left behind she pulled out her false teeth and offered me a gummer lost all the giblets in the front of her mouth in a car accident for the sake of contributing to this post we'll say i said no god this is the kind of stuff i scroll to the bottom for catfish clearly the person was handsome in their youth had done a bunch of drugs and wore it on their face and used pictures of someone else that looked a little like they used to early internet data here ran into a string of girls who were recovering h addicts they all used pictures from when they were on h because they were skinnier back then she asked me to carve my name in her back with a rather large knife while i fricked her butt there were other names sounds like a nolep writing prompt we were only 13 summer fling she was very adamant about wanting to frick which i found both exciting and frightening considering i had never heard a girl talk like that before and also didn't quite understand what that implied we were hanging out unsupervised with a few friends at a house party and snuck off to some bedroom clothes came off and some kind of instinct took over me i just knew that i had to put my face down there and finally figure out what this pee thing was all about maybe rub my face in it and see what happens well as soon as i got down there the most god-awful stench hit me like the first time you smell a rotting dead animal the smell of death a primal archetypal ancestral memory that rushes to the surface and says stop what you're doing right now something is wrong i don't even remember what my excuse was did i manage to calmly pull her panties back up say something stupid and get the frick out years later i realized she probably had a yeast infection and didn't know also the way she was at 13 in general not just the unusually high libido implied she was being abused probably by her father after that summer she mailed me a photo of herself spread eagle on a bed photographer unknown with a pretty explicit handwritten letter which my mom opened and read good times that crap was traumatic enough that it helped delay losing my virginity for a little too long but i'm so freaking glad i didn't lose it to her girl in college asked me if i could pick up a specific cologne for our date as it wasn't too expensive and i didn't currently have one i agreed fast forward to the end of the date she comes to take my shirt off and says um you smell like my dad i was out went to my buddy's girlfriend's place with him and ended up fingering his gf's twin sister she smelled horrible though i was too drunk to tell until afterwards i noped out of sex at that moment and we ended up leaving very soon after apparently she smelled so bad my fingers reached and the guys were gagging in the car on the ride home so they made me hold my hand out the window the entire ride home this was mid-winter in ontario canada so they made me hold my hand out the window the entire ride home this was mid-winter in ontario canada not their fault you grappled with the cooter or doom [Music] are you circumcised no i'm not mmm i want to lick your dong cheese instant mood cooler for the record i don't have any smegma i make sure my junk is always clean i knew a few guys i noped out on that could fulfill that for them was freaking this girl doggy style and she started crapping everywhere guess you can say i literally freaked the crap out of her it wasn't nearly as bad as most of these but my puppy walked over layered down next to my foot side and laid her head down on my foot it was so dang cute that it made sex super weird i had to stop immediately yeah was having sex with a girl who had a colorful history anyway i was definitely wrapping it up and i had fingers her a bit we start having sex and then this smell hits me so bad like sure bad rotten flesh is what it smelled like anyway i quickly end it before finishing and walk her to the bus stop asap i get home and my apartment still smells so freaking bad i end things with this girl and move on but a week later i can still smell this but not all the time turns out it wasn't the girl it was a bag of spoiled sausages i must have thrown out my window when i was drunk or something and it had been sitting in the sun now mostly green right under my window the one i didn't open often that had opened the night i was sleeping with this girl because cuddles had made it so hot oh man for those who have witnessed a wedding objection during the speak now a forever hold your peace portion what happened i was working at a wedding when i was younger i was running the bar at the reception which was very close to the hall the weddings were at we were told that the reception would begin around 4 p.m it was already about 3ish and i was packing fridges the usual bar man things while one of the male guests was still sitting there drinking i asked if he was not joining the reception to which he replied something along the lines of when i have the courage he downs his drink and leaves 10 minutes later he's back looking extremely disappointed guy orders a drink and less than 30 seconds later another guy who's dressed extremely well turned out to be the groom walks in punches him in the back of the head and leaves this dude just picked his drink up and sipped it further i eventually found out that this dude had done his drink walked into the receptions down admitted to sleeping with the wife on her hen night and again the night before the wedding he was never invited to the wedding he just felt the groom needed to know so he found out where the wedding was suited up and dropped the infomid ceremony the groom deserved to know his bride-to-be was cheating on him but it seems unnecessarily dramatic to tell him that the wedding of all times this was in the early 70s and semi-rural washington state my cousin was getting married and my aunt and the mother of the groom did not get along well during the ceremony when the pastor got to the part about objecting my aunt said something to my uncle and the groom's mom jumped up and grabbed my aunt and they started going at it all the way out the door and into the parking area they were separated and everyone filed back into the barn where the wedding continued the best part though was when another one of my cousins simply walked into the woods after the wedding because that's where he lived story is great but i'm up voting that last sentence my aunt was getting married to her second husband and during the speak now forever hold your peace bit their baby started crying the dude officiating it said if anyone older than six months has any objections speak now forever hold your peace he got a laugh and the wedding carried on they're still together 10 years later so i guess whatever my cousin had to say was misinformed a lot of these stories hinge on an unflappable officiant who makes a witty quip and keeps rolling i hope people not yet married reading this thread take away the importance of hiring the right person to officiate i bet the laugh in that room was solid the best man at my step-sister's wedding did this it happened at the rehearsal the night before it was a very large wedding and the rehearsal was bigger than a lot of weddings the minister was going over the vows quickly while giving instruction on what to do when he said something about objections the best man interrupted saying he had to put a stop to this he was in love with the bride and was sure she felt the same way my sister and everyone else was horrified it caused plenty of chaos and confusion as far as i know after that neither the bride nor groom ever spoke to him again so worst man hum to be fair i didn't witness this but it happened to my parents my mom invited an ex she was still rather close with to her wedding and he stood up and yelled i object little did everyone at the wedding know my dad had gotten rather close with him and paid him to stand up and object just for the shoots and giggles and he bursts out laughing my mom didn't find it as funny and it really started their marriage off on the right foot all fun and games until the bride responds by gasping though in certix's name i never stopped loving you it was a medieval themed wedding the best man declared his love for the bride challenged the groom to a fight for her love they march outside draw swords and go at it apparently they choreographed two nights a week for like six months but it honestly looked like they were trying to kill each other the groom wins and everything goes on like normal zero are weird but cool i attended a wedding as a guest of a family member and one thr pastor said that the doors busted open to the sanctuary and a man appeared and started to say i do but two huge ushers one who was my date quickly grabbed the guy before he could say anything but under the arms and literally lifted him up off the floor and carried him out the wedding continued as normal turned out the guy was the ex of the bright strangest sight i ever saw sounds like they were forewarned that might happen at my cousin's wedding when the exchanging of vows took place my aunt shouted wasn't there supposed to be a part where you could object or something along those lines aunt i object minister overruled one of my friends interrupted his cousin's wedding to come out of the closet he couldn't understand why people were soapy at him there's a time and place and that place is definitely not a wedding and certainly not during the ceremony when i was 13 we went to my second cousin's wedding everything is going great they even got past the speak now forever hold your peace part they wrote their own vows but before my second cousin's fiance wife could even begin her vows his son got up announced to the entire room that she was cheating on his dad with her drug dealer and he couldn't let his dad marry her my second cousin yelled at his son to either sit down or leave the son left my second cousin married her anyways and five years and one baby later he finds out it was true and they separated but were too tweaked out to be able to afford a divorce finally he got married a third time but before he could get married his third now ex-wife had to pay for their divorce this wedding had no objections they moved to missouri and this time instead of separating or asking for a divorce he decided he didn't want to be married anymore and just moved back to cali to get back together with his second ex-wife yet family dinners are a little awkward how's the sun doing groom's dad interrupted the wedding to ask the bride's father whether or not she was truly a virgin then he went on about how he didn't know anything of the wedding and blah blah blah truly weird and embarrassing i was there with an ex-boyfriend when the groom's father interrupted the wedding the bride's father officiating the wedding did in fact say it was confirmed i have no clue how what they seem to be super conservative and war-sleeved dresses long hair etc and were af american they eventually showed the father-in-law out and continued with the ceremony which was super awkward afterwards it was literally as if i was on pranked said x seemed to find the ordeal entertaining because she was humiliated this was his family bride and that sort of sealed the deal something was wrong with the guy we broke up a week later it is worse if father of the bride could actually answer that question accurately got booted out of my cousin's wedding reception with about 20 other people my cousin had her wedding on a farm with a massive pig roast from what i remember there was a massive amount of people anyway her father and my other older cousin never really got along at one point during the reception my older cousin had enough and absolutely lost it he looked at a handful of us and asked if we had his back of course we all nodded not really knowing what was about to happen he disappeared and a few minutes later comes back with a 20-pound bag of pork meat from the leftover roast he walks down to where my cousin's dad is my aunt proceeds to yell lonnie no and smacks him right in the side of the face with a bag of meat an all-out family brawl ensued the whole family hasn't been invited to a wedding ever since at my own wedding but not in the traditional way we were getting married along a river at the end of summer and tons of wake boarders and boats were out i was a bull of nerves and the ceremony felt so serious when all of a sudden some dude bro on a boat blasting music scream don't do it bro and sped off it was actually hilarious and made the rest of the ceremony a lot more fun my husband and i cracked up even though his brothers looked like they were about to jump in the river after the guy on mobile sorry for formatting issues witness this a few months ago random guests stood up and proceeded to basically declare his love for the bride and pour his heart out saying that it should bean him up on the altar that day whole room went dead silent bride went red with embarrassment and groom went red with anger best man promptly called for djmc to start playing music all this was in front of the random person's wife didn't go down to well i once went to a wedding where both families were irish gf knew them but i didn't at the ceremony the groom's ex-wife started shouting crap and was gently directed outside i couldn't hear what was said the reception was amazing nice venue and all but a bunch of guests had brought their own instruments and just started jamming what i can only describe as a genuine irish jig this went on for hours and remains a lasting memory of oral beauty but i digress there was a lot of booze there was no responsible serving of alcohol and i'm certain it was by design at some point i used the men's room and was curious if i'd just seen the groom in a stall door open with someone who was not the bride i didn't know these people and it might have just been someone else so said nothing sometime later in the gf state seriously we should get going now yes sure we grab our crap and head downstairs i see the suspicious fellow again in the stairwell going to absolute town on this same lady gf grabs my arm tightly and keeps walking past mumbles a thank you for the invite i just smile and follow cause it's all weird yep that was the groom octopusing his ex-wife at his own wedding to another woman the bride genuinely seemed a gem the look that woman gave us as we passed was this smuggly dominant i always get what i want frankie drunk as frick glare wow they had some reasonable bubbly in a tub for people to take home and who would know or care if we hawked a few extras i got it all explained to me after we were in a cab and well on our way home i never got a follow-up to that story but 10 stroke 10 on the music would tag along to an irish wedding again once the traditional music that's what you referred to as a jig still very popular in ireland starts playing it will usually get a bit chaotic i found i was best man at a wedding and the groom's older sister decided to play a joke and stood up and said i object then started giggling croom's mother stood up slapped her told her it was not an appropriate joke and told her to go home this mother still refuses to talk to her daughter four years later i'm guessing that mother-daughter relationship wasn't exactly rock solid to start with went to a co-worker's wedding and the maid of honor objected and admitted to being the other woman and that the groom had been cheating with her for months the bride left in tears and the groom immediately tried to get with them but she told him she wasn't gonna hurt the bride further in that he needs to frick off the bride is doing much better and is now a manager here and i haven't heard from the groom in over a year the mo and bride are on speaking terms but i don't think their relationship is gonna ever be what it used to be i don't know what [ __ ] here sleeping with her friend's fiance or waiting until the middle of her presumably expensive wedding to tell her and presumably in front of a crowd of friends and family it was at my wedding that we had at my grandmother's house who lives out in the country next to a cattle farm the cows didn't make a peep till that moment and one finally went moo we all laughed and continued but it was a funny moment about my wedding i had cows mooing at my wedding too except it was constantly through the whole ceremony i was at an orthodox jewish wedding with a chopper ceremony where they read a contract and recite seven blessings the groom's dad pinched his son's derea at a most solemn moment caused him to loudly shriek into the silent audience of 400 bride saw and snorted loudly they also publicly kissed after the ceremony which was a huge scandal i don't understand that if someone objected and get thrown out during the ceremony anyway then why would they open the chance for them to object in the first place can't they just cut off that line and let the bride and groom kiss in peace not speak now part but well you'll see friend of mine was getting married in the park under the trees because both of them were nature people and groom had a dog that went everywhere with him that wasn't allowed in any church because dog despite being well trained and quiet there were some resort chairs with lots of people filling them including groom's mother who was sitting with his dog bride and groom were at the front with the officiate officiant begins official comes to the part where he says do you take groom's dog shadow began to howl aloud long mournful howl everyone laughed officiand started the question again loud long mournful howl again everyone laughed groom told shadow to come to the front shadow ran up stood directly in between the bride and groom and the officiant started again not a peep from shadow her vows his vows a fishy and looked at shadow and asked shadow do you take bride and groom to be your lawfully wedded parents shadow barked one single bark offician concluded the ceremony everyone sheared and clapped and shadow barked three times the only times that he made any sounds not kidding beautiful dog too a wedding i was at one guy got up and pledged his undying love for the bride followed by four or five others objecting for various reasons including one guy's love for the groom by the second or third objection though it was clear that the whole thing was a clever ruse i found out later that it was all set up by the bride as a prank on the unsuspecting groom and family and friends it was pretty hilarious should have had the guys fight over it for extra comedic effect but yeah three including the gay guy is enough my boyfriend was friends with a guy who was getting a quickie marriage and needed witnesses we agreed and went inside the little reception room where the preacher bride and the groom were lined up waiting on us the preacher started his thing and i noticed a woman come in and lean against the back wall she looked pee standing with her arms crossed preacher is there anyone here today who objects to the union of band please speak now the couple looked back at us and we both smiled suddenly the bride's attention turned to the woman in the back of the room bride what the f is she doing here the woman quickly raises her hand looking at the old preacher woman i object i don't agree with this marriage the bride glares at her bride shut up b wait your freaking turn it's my scheduled day you're just mad you didn't think of it first the woman had to be dragged out of the room kicking and screaming and spitting at the bride after the reception my bf's friend explained that he was originally in a relationship with the bride after 10 years together he started sleeping with her sister the woman they were close sisters until both ladies got pregnant by him simultaneously they fought each other like cats and dogs for the next several years until the two cousins became school-aged and best friends neither one of the sisters would give up the man and he wasn't sure which one he loved more so he kept seeing both women last i heard they were all still together but the two sisters had teamed up to take down his pregnant mistress what the frick my friend almost paid me to do it at my dad's marriage and i was so close to agreeing but my dad overheard and stopped me i would have done it for free if i knew how freaking crazy that stupid woman was back then here in the uk there's financial sanctions if the reason isn't good enough id doing it for a laugh my friends knew me very well and warned me in advance nobody had said speak now but the groom's ex still decided to get up and scream that he was her soul mate that she forgave him for this whole thing and that they should leave now because he'd proven his point by breaking up with her five years earlier falling in love and holding a wedding i ate so much cake and got so drunk at that wedding meanwhile everyone else was screaming and throwing crap good times the bride was my boyfriend's ex no idea why they invited us either your boyfriend or the groom's ex were invited because the other was i don't ask your ex to the wedding or i'll be inviting mine to kind of move a friend of the couples in cosplay armor think master chief ryan asked the date said then i'm not too late pointed a big fake spacey rifle at the bride and said mother of the genocide the fruit of thy womb will never destroy my planet die not her name and the groom went her name is her name seriously seriously this is date yes comma time yes comma almost right location oh no you want other very similar location one so commonly confused the invitations had mentioned it oh my bad have a nice day theater mages man i do not even that's funny but i cringed not at a wedding but at a funeral a young man mid-twenties had passed away rather suddenly in some sort of accident his wife of the year also and their respective families and friends are all in attendance as they are getting ready to lower him into the ground the pastor dude asks if anyone would like to say anything further and another woman in her early 30s stood up she began to tell everyone in attendance about how much pain she was in over the loss of the love of her life and that the two of them were meant going to be together and now they can't yup the poor wife had to find out about the cheating at the funeral ro that woman sounds absolutely heinous like the dead guy is a [ __ ] too but to do that at his funeral to his family two i have one of these my friend groom was getting married to this awful girl we all hated they broke up during the rehearsal dinner after arguing about the order the groom's men would stand in she wanted her brother hire in the order wedding still happened the next day even though they were broken up we all show up to the church not knowing if the bride would show or what the frick would happen she shows up pastor asks for the objections and her mom objects yells something about how the groom is a piece of crap and isn't welcome in her family mum leaves the church dad and brother leave after her bride is just standing there staring at the groom with a real smug look on her face and says told you you should have put my brother second in line instead of fifth pastor doesn't know what to do but just kinda keeps on trucking and eventually they're married drank a crap ton at the reception we all did also their divorce now didn't even make it a whole year my wife drug me to a wedding that i did not want to be at years ago but i'm forever grateful that she did because i was able to witness one of the greatest spectacles of human drama that has ever taken place this was like an episode of jerry springer mixed with cops bride's lover spoke up at that moment and yelled i'll be goddamn if i'm gonna keep my mouth shut and let you steal my woman you're sorry piece of crap this deranged old redneck proceeds to come at the groom with a pistol threatening to shoot him if he doesn't give her up it wasn't a huge wedding maybe 40 or so people but every single one of them went screaming and running and maybe two people stayed and called the cops i grabbed my wife's hand and we retreated outside to watch the rest of the scene unfold from the church window i went to a wedding when i was five it was between my older brother and his fiance anyways they said the whole speak now spiel and right before he was done little five-year-old me said i object and everyone turned to me i was dead silent because i didn't know what would happen my dad asked me well why do you object and i said i did not know what would happen if i did and i was promptly seated my cousin was big into bodybuilding when he was younger and has always been really tall around the time he got married he was probably six feet six inches 260 pounds i was 18 at the time and i'll never forget when the priest asked are there any objections to this union my cousin turned to the crowd and opened his arms wide and gestured as if daring someone to object the whole place erupted in laughter it was amazing i can't imagine him with sleeves just ripped shoulders and cuffs at his wrists i was at an outdoor ceremony once with a storm coming in the pastor was trying to move things along so that we wouldn't get caught in the rain the reception was indoors he asked if anyone knows of any objection and instantly there was a loud clap of thunder to his credit the pastor just paused a moment and then said anyone else all right in that case and finished the ceremony i was house training my puppy and for a day or two he tried peeing on the deck as soon as he left the door the third time i caught him and hollered no and then boom massive thunderclap puppy leapt off the deck peed on the grass and has never peed the deck again my dad insisted on having this in his and my mom's wedding because he wanted it to mean speak now or forever hold your peace meaning my mom was his piece of butt almost 40 years later they're still married side note when he walked me down the aisle at my first wedding he let me know i could still say no even two steps from pachelbel's canon indeed i said nope and giggled silly me we were divorced six years later this happened very recently but in a different manner than the other comments i'm seeing for yours groom and best man are super close room together and the running joke is that they're more than friends later on groom meets bride falls in love and proposes new running joke is that best man is very disappointed that groom is marrying someone else at the wedding officient asks if anyone has objections best man objects official quickly overrules the objection it was planned and bride thought it was a funny way to acknowledge the super close friendship between groom and best man did not result in anyone being kicked out or awkwardness fun and surprisingly appropriate i was expecting this to end with the running joke turning out to be true and the groom and best man living happily ever after lol the groom himself he just stood up there and started crying and in front of everyone told the bride that he'd fallen out of love with her a while before but he didn't know how to break it off it was extremely uncomfortable they both stepped out and 10 minutes later came back out and got married because she'd apparently told him she was pregnant they're still together with three kids and i'm not sure about the husband but i can confirm that the wife is having an affair neither of them are happy but she has a comfortable life and he doesn't have the spine to leave this is really depressing i'm a pastor and i officiated a wedding once where the groom had a little too much to drink before the ceremony not a huge deal to me but his sister who was a bridesmaid found out she got pee and as i was walking down a hallway after using the restroom i overheard her talking to him and she said something along the lines of if you have one more beer i'm telling the bride what you did last night i was unsure what to do i felt like it wasn't my place to intervene so i didn't say anything the wedding went fine and they are still married i'm still curious as to what he did edit grammatical errors como i'm still super curious as to what he did hopefully not his sister husbands and wives that got divorced after 20 years of marriage what made you decide to change your mind after all that time my husband's parents did this he said he knew his parents weren't happy for a long time said they went to family therapy together but ultimately once my husband went to the army he was the younger of two they divorced and both later married other people these two could not get along for anything they hated each other at our wedding we had to take separate family pictures with the dad a new wife and then with the mom and my sister-in-law it was insane cut to about two years after our wedding and i get a phone call from father-in-law's wife of 10 years she is in hysterics she had caught him in bed with my mother-in-law my husband would not believe it until he talked to his father that was over 10 years ago my in-laws both divorce their partners and have been together ever since my mother-in-law has all their old family pictures on display everywhere and acts like they never divorced and have been together for over four decades hahaha this is a roller coaster and that last part dear god had to watch my parents go through the paperwork to get divorced after my dad had a massive stroke and was forced to retire it was the only way for them to keep the money from his pension and maintain his health insurance coverage my parents got a divorce of convenience so pops could make the mortgage payments and get his insulin thankfully my parents insurance agent is a close friend and found every possible form and loophole so they could stay in the house together it took almost two years to get everything settled i'll never forget my dad's statement after it was all done the church still says we're married and that's what matters to us at least now your mother can still get her hearing aids and pay the mortgage if something happens to me i was so disgusted with it all i never forgave my dad's union for it and we now make sure someone from our family shows up to their annual open meeting when they discuss the health insurance plan to shame them in explicit detail with how the board fricks over the rough necks your dad must be a heck of a man go through with a divorce to make sure him and your mother will be taken cared of and yes his union sucks major balls 23 years i had lied to her several times over the years and she always forgave me the last time i lied to her about accruing a severe amount of debt due to a gambling addiction i think she might have forgiven the lie but she couldn't forgive the addiction and the chance i start gambling again i started attending gamblers anonymous after i told her but it was too little too late for her on the plus side i haven't gambled in almost three years my parents divorced after like 18 years due to gambling he was a total [ __ ] when he was losing and i was a teenager i was probably grounded for a year of my life for more he hasn't gambled in 10 years now and is a freaking treat to be around he still occasionally apologizes for being such and butthole there's a guy in my town that everyone knows about because he owns this huge butt mansion in a middle-class neighborhood apparently he was married to a woman for a long time but she left him calling him a loser because his business hadn't taken off yet after she left him his business finally took off he sells medical equipment to hospitals and he became fricky levels of rich in a few years the reason he built the mansion in that neighborhood was because that is where she lives so she has to drive by the mansion on her way to work every day our pro revenge my mom filed for divorce after 27 years with my dad us kids were out of the house and i think she had a mid-life crisis thinking that if she decided to do nothing then that's how she'd die in that house doing nothing but things that make the days go by faster i do believe an old high school flame helped her make the decision as well at first i was hurt but as i get older now i completely get why my dad prefers routine over excitement and had a habit of saving us poor when we didn't need to at first it was a financial requirement then it became obsession my mom wanted to travel and experience new things in her later years she deserves that and my dad deserves to live how wants to too today i see two happier people and that makes me happy my parents got divorced after 22 years of marriage they were never in love and didn't even like each other they had me and then my sister a few years later and wanted to stay together for the kids 12 years after i was born they had my brother and that kept the cycle going i wish i could say they are happy now but they still like to cause trouble for each other with you with our first child soon and they're gonna have to figure out how to be grandparents together thankfully i'm 1500 miles from them so it won't be a headache often i worked at a law firm that only practiced family law divorces child custody wills and estates etc at one time we had like eight clients getting divorced after 20-plus years of marriage and they were all high-ranking military men whose wives came out of the closet after all their kids had grown up and moved out of the house and the guys were getting ready to retire i thought it was so weird but i guess for whatever reason the women thought that their duties to their husbands and families were coming to an end and they wanted to live for themselves i guess i know why they couldn't come out 30 years ago it was a different time but i was curious why they were all attracted to military guys i assume maybe cause it meant their husbands would be away for years at a time during their service i think it depends more on how old the women were when they first married military people often tend to marry young and quickly you don't know yourself when you're young 20 years will do that to you my parents split up after nearly 30 years my dad was a butthole my entire life so when they finally divorced when i was 18 there was no surprise he'd been cheating for years and i think he was the one who finally asked for it i think my mom stayed because she couldn't afford to start over she spent her life putting my dad through school and wasn't educated herself she had no family or anyone who could help her either there was definitely some confidence issues on her part too my husband began surreptitiously going to strip clubs he stole about 200 a week from various accounts and a business i own to fund these activities he lost his job because he went there so often at lunch and would just stay we had young kids and so i stayed after he got some therapy he was never honest with a therapist about a year ago i learned he was doing it again plus texting strippers my youngest kid graduates high school this year i've done what's best for everyone else for 20 years now this september was 21 years i don't anticipate having a 22nd anniversary it's really scary to think of being alone i don't hate him i feel sorry for him i know he will feel very sad and lonely when i'm gone but being near him feels like having my soul ripped from my body every day i hope you find some peace you've been keeping it together for your family for so long you need to live for you now therapy changed my mind after more than a decade of being miserable i finally got help when i was able to really talk about my marriage was when i realized that i needed to get the frick out at the end of the day i stayed in a crappy marriage because the thought of being alone scared me through therapy i was clued into how many wonderfully supportive friends and family members i had if i just reached out to them i wasn't going to be in a relationship anymore but i wasn't alone either congratulations and good for you that must have been a difficult process of realization and growth in my experience it's much more pleasant to be alone if a little lost and lonely than together with someone toxic not myself but my parents they were married for 22 years when they separated 24 years by the time the divorce was final from the perspective of a child in the situation there was no way that they were happy people together there was hardly ever a quiet moment in the house because of my father's temper but my mother knew how to serve it back too however the final straw was more of a chain of events my father had a very rigid view of the family man works woman stays home cares for the home and children when i was in high school my father got injured at work and needed surgery he worked a physically demanding job and would be out for six months my mother knowing that we were already falling behind on vehicle and house payments decided to find part-time employment she worked while the kids were in school it was still important to her to see her kids get on the bus and be there when they got home my father immediately believed that she was cheating on him he installed a tracker and tape recorder in her car he showed up at her workplace and caused the scene multiple times he questioned her co-workers he spent most of time at the house drinking this was not an equal partnership and it really never was you should have seen how hurt he acted when my mom finally asked for a divorce but he rebounded real quick all he had to do was tell some woman on plenty of fish his sob story and he moved right into her house he spent a couple of years treating her and her children horribly before she kicked him out only took him a couple of weeks in a hotel to find another woman to let him move in parents divorced after 25 years when my mom had what we thought at the time was a mid-life crisis she told my dad by draining three dollars k from the joint checking account to fund her divorce lawyer six years later they were officially divorced since she blew through that money on different lawyers that kept firing her as a client we later ruled out midlife crisis when her behavior started to become more odd erratic and paranoid she was in her early 50s when this behavior started now we myself and my sister-in-law with psychology experience think she has late onset bipolar and i say think since we can't get her officially diagnosed since she believes nothing is wrong with her she lives in ny and it is super hard to commit someone there unless they are a danger to themselves or other people she's not dangerous just can't hold down a job and lives in her car due to her own insubordinate sporadic paranoid behavior but blames everyone else no she's not a narcissist just mentally ill since she was never like this when we were growing up but she was very selfless and caring when she was younger we were together for 20 years married for 15. we started as high school sweethearts but we eventually realized that we weren't the same people we were when we fell in love we also realized that that wasn't going to change we decided that the best way for everyone to be happy for the rest of our lives was to end it on peaceful terms before we were both 70 and resentful of each other for trapping each other in an unhappy marriage for 40 plus years i will be one of the few that speaks from experience i have been married 20 years and we are on the edge the answer is that life changes you when you start out the relationship is its own thing it is cultivated and grows then over the years add some children and full-time jobs and there is less time to cultivate or none you end up becoming life partners to run the household and wonder why you are even together since there are no good times all that is left are arguments and bad times this is all normal and on top of that you are both going through the personal struggles of living to be honest staying married is tougher than most people think in an age without divorce social stigma the kids do keep you together hoping somehow you can rekindle something that once existed and this is in a situation with two good people trying to do the right thing and not a toxic situation with abuse obligatory not me my parents my dad filed for divorce after 25 years of marriage my mom was shell-shocked my dad was absolutely miserable but the signs of a failed marriage were always present my dad is very emotional and is quick to anger he never really handled failure very effectively and would be mad instead of constructive my mom very family oriented and was adamant that we never move farther than 40 miles from chicago heck when i was going away to college she balled to my dad to force me to go to a school closer to home in a way i think my dad resented my mom for never letting him travel or get away from chicago it also doesn't help that i'm fairly certain my mom become undiagnosed depressed once her mom died all she would do was do her bare minimum at her job a school bus driver come home and sleep finish a route for the day cook a hamburger help a meal for the family and then play angry birds on her ipad it's really weird seeing your parents divorce in your 20s you're adult enough to speak candidly and neither of them likes what you have to say about them during or after the fact the silver lining out of it is my sisters and i know how not to behave in a relationship your last paragraph so true as someone whose parents divorced when i was 22 it was good in a way because i was able to comprehend it more but it also messed me up with trust issues and still made me feel really lost but i was an adult so i was just expected to deal with it didn't get divorced but started the process after about 25 years stuck it out for a few more years for the kids and ended up falling in love with her after the kids moved out relationships follow cycles so glad i stuck it out stories like this give me hope would love to hear some of your tips on how you made the relationship work again not me but my grandmother once told me that she was considering divorcing her husband of over 50 years the reason she gave me was we stayed together for the kids now the kids are all grown up and have lives of their own and now i can't ignore the small things about him my grandpa that annoy me she didn't go through with it but she seemed sincere when she said it it broke my heart especially since i only ever saw the best side of him heard a story about a couple divorcing in their late 80s after 70 years of marriage when asked why they waited with it for so long they responded that they did not want to disappoint their children so they did it when their children died of old age we were together for 20 years but only married for 13 of them our interests just diverged over the years i got more into music and art wanted to go to festivals and such and she wanted to frick her boss i'm very grateful our attempts to have kids failed it's much much easier to make a clean break that way that's quite the divergence a friend of mine was married for nearly 30 years two kids as she put it they'd been playing divorce chicken for a decade there weren't any concrete reasons to get divorced they didn't fight they actually got along very well they just weren't in love anymore there was always a good pragmatic reason for them to stick together they co-parented effectively they actually liked each other they kept saying their marriage was probably better than a lot of people's a few years ago they just decided it was time they went out for drinks and started hashing out how to divide their assets they agreed on a 50-50 split they got a lawyer to make everything legit and a few months later they got divorced my friend's ex-husband rented a house a few blocks away so their kids could easily walk between mom's and dad's house about six months after the divorce was finalized my friend's ex-husband set her up with a new boyfriend they go on double dates they go to parent teacher conferences together what a refreshingly sensible way to approach such a sensitive issue rather than drag it along like so many others they were able to see that they weren't happy and even more surprisingly they didn't hold bitterness and grudges towards each other i wish all the people who aren't happy in their current life situation could behave so maturely and handle it in such a healthy way she cheated for years plain and simple ended our 22-year marriage tbh don't even want to work through it now that we've separated for a while i realize how toxic she'd become i'm a much better man without her my mom left my dad on their 30th wedding anniversary he had been in and out of rehab three times at that point and could not commit to quitting drinking she couldn't stay and watch him drink himself to death anymore my dad had multiple affairs and my mom got tired of it there was also alcoholism and both parents were workaholics my dad remarried a lovely woman and so did my mom oh that may have been an issue too must be rough when they discovered they married the same woman not me but a lady i worked with her and her husband had been married for almost 30 years they had two kids both in their mid-late teens and a full life together she was the stay-at-home mom he made the big bucks etc anyways once the kids both started to grow up and stop wanting to go to the cottage they realized that when left alone together they didn't have much in common then the kids started leaving for school and i guess things got worse i think everything would have been fine if not for the father's dad the grandfather getting sick it turns out the old man had near four dollars million to his name and was giving it all to the father so dad consults a lawyer who says that since it's an inheritance if he's divorced before he gets it he can keep all of it and as such he divorces her within days she stopped working for us shortly after but i know it was pretty hard on her she got her fair shake of the currently owned assets but couldn't touch the four dollar mill my grandparents initiated divorce proceedings a month after my dad the youngest of his siblings graduated college they had stayed together to provide a stable home for their children and once they'd all left the nest my grandparents were ready to move on my parents intended to separate after 20 or so years once my sister and i left the home her mum got sick and dad cares for her they live almost completely separate lives in the same house i check in their daily bc of my own marriage having gone south and financially ruining me i see a fair amount of these divorces get filed by older folks because one of them has dementia or the like and needs to be moved into a care facility the couple will file for divorce in order to protect the family assets from getting completely eating up and medicaid takes over the brunt of it it is pretty sad that our health care state is such that it is necessary to take such a step to make sure someone gets the care that they need without destroying the other spouse's ability to care for themselves until the shredded safety net do us part i before not my story my grandparents they met and married in the 50s super catholic family six kids in nine years thereabouts husband worked wife took care of the family dynamic it was honestly a lot of little things that my grandma eventually got tired of first it was trying to wrangle her three boys all the difficult personalities to church so they stopped going then it was things like not helping with the difficult kids women's work not helping with household chores that's what kids are for being emotionally distant he's a man they don't do emotional crap etc from the way my grandma tells it she stuck it out so long because she thought that's what a good catholic woman does be long-suffering and patient it wasn't until she started exploring outside catholicism that she decided she'd suffered long enough the divorce ended up being civil and mutual grandpa was never one for causing a scene and both my grandparents ended up in loving understanding second relationships neither remarried officially funny random side note when i graduated high school in 2012 my mother invited both my grandparents to my graduation by that time they'd been divorced for longer than they'd been married 20 odd years together 30 plus years divorced by my mouth and didn't even recognize each other until after the ceremony imagine spending a huge chunk of your life with someone then not recognizing them in public years later i'd also point out if i saw my 50 years younger self in the streets i wouldn't recognize me either i was married to a wonderful woman for 27 years one daughter a perfect little family then i had an affair and it broke her heart we are still good friends and i see her at least once a week but i wish i could go back and undo the terrible damage i did now i'm 60 i live alone and all i have left are memories and regrets my husband had an affair around our 24th year he broke my heart too we are still together now at 29 years i'm not sure i'll ever heal from it everything is changed my entire view of the world has changed even now years later i'm reeling knowing that the person i loved and trusted more than anyone else on earth could and did hurt me so badly 28 years and i lost him to mental illness i tried for years to get him help but he refused he is a genuinely good person and was once an amazing husband and father i have been divorced over two years and still haven't dated anyone because no one will ever compare to the man he was smart romantic thoughtful socially conscious hard worker etc that man doesn't exist anymore i am the one who sought the divorce but expected him to want to work it out when he said i think that's for the best i was heartbroken he lives upstairs from me because where would he go i can just toss him to the streets but it does make it harder i feel more like a widow tbh my parents got divorced because of my dad we grew up in a military family dad was always deployed my mom is a walking medical disaster no offense to her rarat 23 endometriosis at 24 got a hysterectomy and everything they married early and had kids really early because of the endometriosis my mom tried to cater to my dad make sure he could still live his life in his 20s because they had kids earlier than expected well being deployed all the time meant my dad could just flick around with ladies off in other places my mom stayed home and took care of us dad gets a divorce when he gets back gets rey married like three months later that lasted like two years before she got her green card and ditched him my mom still loves him despite him moving on to his third marriage having another kid and never actually paying his portion of child support so pretty much they got divorced so my dad could have a younger more subservient wife i would boo him every time he came into the room he was a serial cheater the straw that broke the camel's back was my then 15-year daughter having a panic attack and being hospitalized over the guilt she felt for keeping his secret he had been having an affair with a married woman for a year and had been taking our kids with him to play house with her and her kids while her husband was out of state for work in the oil field he was using his dying grandfather as cover by claiming to be staying overnights in the hospital with him so he wouldn't be alone and that he was taking our kids with him so they could go home with his mother and get to spend time with their grandparents on that side he threatened our kids and guilted them into keeping it a secret until my daughter just couldn't handle it anymore she told me he called her a lying bee and a stupid w and when she ran to her bedroom to get away from him screaming at her he chased her and kicked her bedroom door down to get at her for telling i put him out of my house immediately and divorced him also his entire family knew what he was doing and kept up the sleeping in the hospital with dying ground park cover for him he had been taking this woman and her kids to his family functions and they all welcomed them with open arms his mother went so far as to also verbally attack my daughter when she told and called her a liar and accused her of stirring up drama for the attention holy cow that's messed up i'm sorry you had to deal with that my parents started considering divorce right around that time but ended up deciding against it my dad was military and had ptsd from afghanistan but it didn't cause problems at home because he was stationed at a base across the state from us so he was only home on the weekends when he got restationed and we moved we all lived in the same house again his ptsd and my mom's anxiety did not play off of each other well so they considered divorce but decided to work through it what did your crush do that absolutely killed your interest this was in college we were acquaintances and had a few classes together he was cute funny and i totally had a crush on him he asked me out to dinner and a movie at the restaurant he ordered the most expensive things on the menu apps drinks lobster and even dessert when the bill came he said you got this right i was so embarrassed i paid then i said i'd skip the movie because i wasn't feeling well and he asked me to give him twenty dollars for gas and for wasting his time i didn't and just left ugg after that he couldn't seem to understand why i didn't want to go out with him again holy frick mayo i was giving her a place to sleep when she was feuding with her mother after weeks of picking up after her i dared to complain she had a screaming fit packed up a crap and left i was glad to be rid of her until later it got around to me that she was telling people on fb that i kicked her out for refusing to give me a [ __ ] there is a lot i can forgive but that was the first time i had ever had anyone just straight up make stuff up about me frick you a bragged about drinking and driving he told me that he and his friends have a nothing under 100 club where they drink and then drive on the interstate going 100 plus mph and have to send a full-length snapchat video of the speedometer to each other two of my friends had been killed by a drunk driver three months prior oh god that's awful we went to disneyland where i had an annual pass with my friends and family for an event called dapa day where you dress up in dapper clothing so everything looks very old timmy i had done it for years with my friends and he wanted to come and my mom and siblings were going for the first time too i was really excited as it was the first time he had ever met my family well we went on one ride with my family and my friends and then he said do you want to go on a ride just me and you i thought we'd come back and spend the rest of the day with them but as soon as we were out of earshot he was complaining about my family and how weird it was that they were there and he wanted to do disney with just me but he had known they were coming so i was confused then we went on one more ride and he started complaining about how hot it was how tired he was and before lunch he wanted to go home i was super upset but didn't want him leaving on his own so i just went with him but on the way home i wished i had just let him leave and i could have stayed with all the people i loved it was the first time in years my sister and my mom had been to disney and i didn't know it then but it was the last time i got to go with my brothers before they grew up and now they hate me he was just some dude i dated not a boyfriend or anything that lasted very long i'm still so mad at myself for letting him ruin my day but yeah it absolutely killed anything i felt for him and we broke up a few days later revealed his list of conquests not even my brother knows how many women i've slept with then he offered to take my virginity in the back of his pickup truck i passed i'm black she's black our crush was mutual then she found out that i was once in a relationship with a white woman she then jumped down a rabbit's hole of my betrayal of the black family and some other nonsense of my trauma of self-hatred never been turned off by anything faster than that we were in the process of getting together she had called over and we spent an afternoon watching movies and sitting close together by about eight in the evening she was considering staying later and i was casually encouraging her she asked if she could take a shower and i was like yeah sure of course glad that the bathroom was clean and tidy and i had fresh towels anyway about four minutes later she calls me saying she needs help with the shower and i give her a moment to get a towel around herself and knock on the bathroom door she opens it completely naked and shows me that she's having trouble with the shower controls so i'm kinda unsure whether to make the move or start with the controls so i go with the flow and show her this is hot and cold this is pressure this is rain forest and this is power jets in the five seconds it takes me to do this she has sat on the toilet which is kinda a weird thing because i need to be able to make the next move and she's while she's sitting on the toilet naked with the lid up looking all disinterested i'm thinking i've screwed it up when suddenly curse blush and she takes a dump right in front of me and then another one i was just um i'll leave you to it i tip my head out he talked about how he and his friends used to abuse farm cats they talked about one that was buried and then run over i did the quick 180 and absolutely hated him unfortunately i only heard about the abuse when he was talking to someone else and it wasn't a recent thing think high school and at this point he was a few years into college i also live in farm town usa so this really isn't an uncommon thing and i doubt the cops would do anything i'm glad to see so many caring people on here though cats don't get as much love in my community as they should our three are here living in spoiled royalty and my dad hates it oh well that's definitely serial killer territory she asked if things didn't work out if i would mind if she went out with my roommate i said i couldn't possibly do that to him and left quick we're gonna need an ambulance for this burn he tried to discreetly take photos of my feet nothing against people who are into that but the way he was going about it was super creepy yikes she asked me if i was good with kids because she was pregnant with her ex and that she's not good with kids it was the first date we were teenagers he lived in a different province and we used to chat on skype he wanted me to think he was a badass or something and would always talk about his drug use he ended up faking a rage overdose when we were on chat together i was hysterically crying and freaking out thinking i was watching someone dying and was trying to figure out how to call nine one one in another province when he snapped out of it and told me he was actually okay i didn't talk to him much after that goddamn what a loser stole from a homeless person we were walking together downtown and she saw a bucket of coins in front of a pharmacy she just scooped it all up and kept walking guy comes out as she's 20 feet away or so and yells at her she keeps moving i stood there and just gave him a 20 and didn't hang out with her anymore we were 14 and 15. it was very nice of you to give him money i can't imagine why someone would steal from a homeless person his sister actually approached me and let me know that he was once arrested for locking their other pregnant sister in their basement went on a coke binge while she desperately tried to get out and went outside to beat their unsuspecting neighbours van with the golf club that was a big old nope sisters a legend btw had a crush on this girl back in high school she seemed like a sweet girl after she rejected me i let it go but still was interested in maintaining some sort of friendship found out she was actually pretty toxic behind my back she made fun of me for a lot of things that really didn't matter like hand motions while talking and i just lost interest in her entirely even in a friendship this guy's dong is way too big like disgustingly big lol he probably can't even find a pair of shorts long enough to conceal it what a loser oh and he moves his hands around a lot when talking this was years ago on a first date tried to convince me to quit my job and put all my savings into gold bars then demanded i let him read my tarot cards to see if we'd be a good fit nope nope nope another controlling type iii huge crush on a fellow uni student i was invited over for what i expected to be a platonic study date but hey any time spent is better than just being alone or so i thought got there and found another student from class also okay study group turns out her mom and her set us up for a full press mlm pitch video literature the works i stayed a bit not to be rude excuse myself shortly and only talk to her in class justin passing from the non huge let down mlm means multi-level marketing aka a pyramid scheme signing up to both buy and sell something while recruiting others to sell also you get a percent of all of your recruit sales also all the percentages basically flow upward so the only way to make any significant money is to be high in the tree towards the top of the pyramid it's all bulls basically that is probably the most insane thing i could imagine you know dang well she's not keeping friends after that told me he was only being nice to me because he was interested in a friend of mine i see his facebook posts now he is dumber than a box of rocks on a treadmill i'm not sure why the box of rocks on the treadmill is dumber than the box of rocks not on a treadmill but i accept the metaphor she got blackout drunk at a party and violently shed her pants the smell alone completely turned me off of any interest i had violently romeo when i was a teenager we worked together as lifeguards i adored him so much until one day he just starts talking about this random woman that he didn't know and wasn't even there that was wearing shorts he said he was fine until she sat down and had some cellulite on her thighs and he kept being angry and talking about how she should be doing squats to be more appealing like his rant was angry and long and no one was adding to his conversation just silence after that i took off my rose-colored glasses and saw that he was in fact a huge dish bag i'm kinda grateful he showed himself that way cause i was really into him until then could have been a bad time for my teenage brain how dare women not be attractive in front of him i wanted douchebag i'm glad you were able to see through to him we worked together and as i got to know him more i learned he talked badly about everyone nurses that are amazing he'd belittle talk about how certain people don't know what they're doing because they asked for an ultrasound iv as they were struggling getting a vein on a rage addict the paramedics were worthless doctors don't know what they are doing who he thought was hooking up and it completely turned me off he's in his early 40s and into gossip more than my teenage daughter ah yes the know-it-all attack who finished half of medic school he picked me up for our first date and his car was disgusting not talking a few trash items the entire back seat and floorboard was completely covered in piled up trash even up front i had to step on empty mcdonald's bags old soda bottles rappers act to even get in and all he said was just move it around with your feet no sorry or anything made me feel like trash too like dang couldn't even clean up a little dumped me after nine months because she wasn't ready for a serious relationship got into a relationship the next day and was married within five months told me that she didn't like me back anymore but maybe if i waited long enough she would like me like that again she told me that i had gotten more critical lately and i changed so she wanted me to change back before she would be with me ugh i hate this you're not an airport you don't get to put people in holding patterns light the back fence of the school on fire to impress a mate should add that he did it whilst high herb is not legal here in australia yet arson does tend to be a deal breaker basically shut me down and made it clear to me that i was being the typical nice guy cliche this is back when i was about 20 after a couple of days of sulking i started examining my behavior and realized she was absolutely right glad it happened my ideas of how a relationship should work were entirely twisted at the time i got my crap together shortly after addressed my stupid and entitled behavior worked on myself mentally and physically and eventually met an amazing woman who is now my wife scary to look back and think how close i got to becoming one of those intel neckbit types you should thank that lady as well talked crap about every woman in his life should have seen the red flags earlier didn't realize until later that he probably did the same to me apparently having an opinion about anything and speaking for yourself isn't a very ladylike thing to do he sounds totally not insecure she invited me over to her place not as a date thing but just to hang out as friends her house was absolutely filthy and the glass of coke she gave me had a hair in it she was really cute had a great personality and was a genuinely nice person but as soon as i saw cat crap on the floor near the front door and just dirty everything my crush disappeared and i left in a hurry yeah there's messi and then there's this said she was staring up a group for lgbt youth i asked her why and then realized i had been barking up the wrong tree i'm dumb she's a lesbian i was a midnight clerk at a truck stop and very very good looking man came in every night on his run to visit with me he wore an ankle monitor for probation parole i asked about it and he told me he was falsely accused of kissing his ex-wife's daughter she was 13. i took his word he seemed to be a real good guy about two weeks later we were bullshitting and flirting and a little girl about 12 years old came in with her dad he looked that little girl up and down like a pervert i was instantly sick to my stomach yikes dude was the perfect epitome of the term douchebag he used to be nice to people only to gain their trust and then betray them he was attractive though and a smooth talker as well we started talking became friends and i developed a crush on him unfortunately i never knew then what type of double-headed snake he was then on one day i witnessed him throwing his best friend under the bus just to save his reputation completely lost interest cut eyes with him and he gave no crap about it only then did i realize how toxic people can be sometimes english isn't my first language so when i read one day i witnessed him throwing his best friend under a bus my brain didn't immediately register that it was a thing i thought he actually murdered his friend she physically shushed me in a group with her finger on my lips while i was singing along with my friends to a cover band frick that she detested cats and insisted that i give up my furry buddy before she'd move in with me it wasn't that she was allergic to cats she issued the ultimatum because according to her my cat received too much of my time and affection and she wasn't going to compete mayo imagine laying awake at night knowing you lost to a cat overheard her insulting my hobbies clothes hairstyle personality l etc with her friends now i was never prince charming but freak me that hurt bouncer at a bar i used to go to i had a mad crush on him he was beautiful he was a bit of a tart every night some starry-eyed equally beautiful woman would leave with him being a bit of a tart was not a deal breaker for me i was too back then if not as successful as him as i'm not a super pretty girl but one night i guess he left crap too late the hot girls were gone and he informed me that he was willing to take me home that night um number nothing less hotter than that'll do pig being treated like a sure thing and of course the answer is gonna be yes because how would someone like me turn down someone like him call me a safe bet i'm betting i'm not being obsessed with weird crazy conspiracy theories being over the age of 20 and having naked woman posted all over his bedroom wall like a teen having crap tons of pee pics of naked woman saved to his computer and talking about how he'd love to punch and fight people normally his friends or people he knew being rude to the waiter and complained that food is taking too long during dinner russia i work in the industry for a year it's not easy when being slammed during rush she offered to drive and picked me up in her car because we had plans to go out to dinner and get to know each other better i realized after about 20 minutes she was not driving to the restaurant and instead stopped at a gas station to get into someone else's car and buy drugs basically made me accessory to a drug deal under false pretenses believe it or not this has sort of happened to me the guy was driving us in my car and conducted a deal in a back streets of an industrial estate close to where i lived i was baffled i had big self-esteem issues and we had been fooling around and i just didn't even care about anything he did up till that point i was so angry he had literally used my car to commit a crime my 18 year old self thought it would be cute to invite him to a christmas parade but this dude had the audacity to ask me why i thought he would ever be interested in someone like me i wish i could take you all to a christmas parade also i met my boyfriend just over a year ago and it has been the most wonderful surprise of my life i just physically cringed this would devastate me girl in car behind him honked when the light turned green he got out of the car and began screaming and banging on her windshield that's when i knew he was a psycho and i needed to get out of that relationship took me a destroyed home and two restraining orders later but we've been broken up for three years now gosh sorry to hear that but glad that you've seen the issue and got out of it she brought a friend to dinner with us which was okay i didn't mind then they both sharp-lifted afterward while i was on the other side of the store told her i didn't date thieves and she broke down apologizing she talked about how she stalked her ex-boyfriend across multiple state lines she wasn't a crush but i just wanted to put this out there this was a first date too treated me like crap for being the only female in our paintball team he said that women belong to kitchen not battlefield he didn't say battlefield we are polish he said something that cannot be translated perfectly so i just captured the idea the word battlefield is mine i didn't know how to call it in english now i know it's a field sorry battlefield lol this was in preschool but she put relish on her hot dog game over i've since learned to love relish and always wonder what could have been i was 21 and in college he was a classmate of mine he seemed so charming and was easy on the eyes one day i overheard him talking to his friends about how he doesn't date engineer women because math is for men some people might miss the point here it's not that he said he wouldn't want to date an engineer that bothered me it's that he said that women aren't meant for math sounds like a buddy of mine well not entirely he doesn't believe the last part about math being for men but he wouldn't date someone who studies engineering since he is also in the field in college i was crazy about a girl named megan she was maybe two years younger than me blonde life of the party type gal took her to dinner and chatted her up about her life got to talking about past sos and realized she had very little experience with meaningful loving relationships romantically it seemed she was on autopilot in fact the more we talked the more obvious it became that she wasn't ready to love anyone but herself which you know good for her self-love and self-discovery are kind of big parts of going away to college and growing up but i realized in that moment that what i wanted versus what she wanted were miles apart it was a crystallizing moment and i felt the distance between us widen and watched her shrink away never asked her out again and she never asked why either she felt it too or autopilot just kicked in or she just wasn't entrusted this is well written i can definitely relate to have the moment crystallize and then immediately feel the separation begin to happen almost like you're dissociating if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Studios

Views: 149,652

Keywords: trouble in paradise, romantic, relationship, dating, marriage, dating advice, relationship advice, wife, husband, couples, #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub

Id: UnmH3ItrlJI

Length: 142min 39sec (8559 seconds)

Published: Tue Dec 01 2020