Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer Play Truth or Dab | Hot Ones

what do you want more of by scepter Rolex hey guys I'm Tom Segura 9 / are burnt crystals they brought back the two biggest guests from hot ones to do one episode together that's right it's not Kevin Horton Shaquille O'Neal it's [ __ ] wale when I was 23 I got involved with awesome I'll say god dammit hey guys check this out a truther dab this week hot ones first we feast first we feast Bert Tom let's go [Music] hey what's going on everybody for first we feast I'm Sean Evans and welcome back to another episode of truth or dab the hot ones special where we give our guests two simple options tell the truth or suffer the wrath of the last app and today we're joined by two of our favorite comedians friends of the brand Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer they both have Netflix specials out right now your mom's house of burped cast wherever you get your podcasts and catch tom live on the second half of his take it down tour tickets on sale now and coming to a city near you and for Bert fans fall tour dates for his body shots world tour will be announced later this month get your tickets Bert Tom welcome to the show thanks buddy thank you for having both of us in front of you you guys have three scorching hot chicken wings that have all been doused in various versions of the last dab of a series of personal potentially awkward questions for each of you you realized how hard that's gonna be to live my career our careers made on just saying the worst things about ourselves on our podcast for the last nine years I'm dying to see these questions well we'll see how far we can push you guys today and Bert let's start with you you seem eager I'm very eager you just finished the North American leg of your body shots tour of the 28 cities you've visited which one was the biggest dump can't wait to come back next year [Laughter] started diving right in ruggle it was Albany how's that there's no bad man really unclear this boat I can see there is going in mondaya committee well on the tour is hot yeah hmm Burt you don't like you forgot what it's like to be here you know you just have me a bottle of this on my tour bus I gave it to my assistant Cobra and he threw up immediately started throwing up it's a good sales point yeah yeah it's not this part it's when it comes out that's a bad one yeah after I did hot ones the first time season two how was it early plan you were for his famous family yeah I know and I tell everyone that holy [ __ ] what was he talking about I [ __ ] my pants and security going through the airport LAX you don't forgot the beginning part of the story I will last time I was on hot ones I did [ __ ] my pair a bucket all right what's next question these tables go lower oh is this for Kevin Hart when you think it might be weight related Tom it's your turn okay in your intro you host your mom's house podcast along with your wife and co-host Cristina Pia fellow comedian what's the secret that you've kept from her that she would not be happy to hear if she were say watching right now in a winger oh oh tom diving in bert setting a high bar so tom now tell it no telling ohso bad hey Pat Oh ma'am dude this is like taking a vicodin your brain just shuts down I jerked off on our pillow we do supposed to eat the wings and then tell the truth yeah choice you know if you're gonna tell the truth you don't have to eat the wing that was really bad oh it hurts the laugh are these hot or do they gonna get hotter round two all right you guys roll with a group of heavy hitters and comedy but it's time to burn some bridges Bert ranked these comedians from funniest to least funny human Joey Diaz Ari Shaffir Joe Rogan and Tom Segura [Music] yeah okay holy [ __ ] man yeah how is this so much worse than last time you get to kind of work your way up to the last step when you're on the show here very steep ramp up when we just lay three less to have wings down or use the loose funny let me say that okay you don't actually have to answer I just wanted to put that out there so everyone knew that or is it loose all right Tom yeah again stir in the pot a little bit I know that you're a very nice guy but comedy it's a competition it's a sport so keep it 100 who has the worst stand-up special on Netflix right now who I know it I know you know until we just talked about it in the green room yeah [ __ ] I can't talk goddamn it dude what are you doing it's a tough show it's a tough show yeah you have a least favorite one disgraceful [Laughter] goddamnit throw an adapter what I really wanted after that one I don't know the answer well now there's no point well something a little something yeah okay what you have said was it wasn't meant to be funny and it was like it was I thought provoker was a TED talk who's good can we see her next one all right on to Round three might have to toss some more wings for these guys my mouth is on [ __ ] fire bro Tom yeah you're known as the water champ right here we're gonna actually put that Aquaman knowledge to the test I know it's one thing to drink water and call yourself the water champ but how much do you really know about water I'm gonna hit you with a water pop quiz get all three of these questions right you're totally in the clear but get one wrong you know the drill [ __ ] win all right or how much of the human body is water and I mean a normal body not like a water champs body is it twenty percent sixty percent or 95 percent sexy is it know how it's gonna be 60 you fill with blood your skin's ten no it's sexy sixty percent six percent good job tom all right which of the Great Lakes is the deepest between Lake Superior Lake Michigan and Lake Ontario tear coming down it's always that left Tom Michigan right it is superior god damn let's let's do this oh you're crying yeah we are in let's do a little double or nothing all right okay you have that wing let's go to this last question here all right you get it right you're in the clear but get it wrong will up the stakes you'll dab last wing okay okay well you saying right you gotta pour some stuff hold it I heard him he sold in a 14-carat diamond-encrusted bottle Beverly Hills 9o h2o claims to sell the most expensive bottle of water in the world how much does it cost forty five thousand dollars seventy five thousand dollars were a hundred grand come on man what the [ __ ] is happening here the most expensive bottle of water under in the world it is $100,000 what did you do it is $100,000 Tom Segura with the lifeline swerves that pothole I got you my man I got you man we still got two rounds to go dude it went away and then I wiped my mouth with my thing and it came back again Bert you guys are both prolific podcasters in the over 300 episode history of the Burke cast who has been your worst guest Oh had the answer [Music] I got two answers should we go with the one that everyone hated the most no I can't put I can't pull it on glass like that there's one you know more that girl bit yeah yeah she's Irish what's the other one I don't know some guy he was he's like I'm not gonna put anyone on blast but you you're already he already kind of did what I didn't okay okay good you did name it you did out it we could do the math all right Tom yeah joke stealing it's one of the biggest taboos and comedy can you out a comedian who you believe has gotten away with ripping material from other committees truther dab or ruining your career it's not even about like not saying it I can't [ __ ] think of one right now whisper in my ear I'll say it I'll say after you say oh [Laughter] just turn the levels up on what he said does that count alright I'm just one more wig to go you could just eat it and it's all Albert he's everybody's jokes is there it worked that's where I got the machine story oops hey jumpy big joke deep well listen there's no robbing your way out of this one okay it is now pop quiz time for you you're a product of Tampa a Florida State grad a Sunshine State dirtbag and proud of it if I've ever seen one so what I'm gonna do is give you a handful a series of Florida man have and it's up to you to figure out if they are real or if they're fake Florida man denies syringes found in his rectum are his real or fake that's I I can see I bet that's real it is real it is you totally see myself in the back of a car one I don't know how they got there it's true as reported by news channel local 10 that's 40 year old Wesley Scott's story and he's sticking to it to more headlines to go Bert you guys just easy peasy Florida man flashes his buttocks at IHOP after impersonating a police officer to get free food real or fake it's the end part that's throwing me about after impersonate because the first part you're like oh that died happens once a week I'm gonna go real it is real it is real according to the Orlando Sentinel when asked if he had money 55 year old Matt's Gitta said no but I am a cop and get food for free obviously things spiraled a little bit after that so big Florida moves it's gonna be a collar to move all right Bert one more headline for you yeah you know the drill get it right here in the clear get it wrong that wing is waiting for you my mouth feels perfect right now okay huh [ __ ] him okay Florida man sent to jail after pouring hot sauce on three month old puppy that's fake that is unfortunately real [ __ ] fortunately gizmo is set to make a full recovery but that is a real headline they were real very cocky put a lot of last dab lose it is it uh by the way this is a real fan right here is it a Coolio tab that's a real fan right that's a real fan right there what happened to Coolio it did have bad you know it was really bad I sued them I worked with Coolio once Oh your dad's a dick Wow Bert cleaning wings getting through five rounds that feel like now it hurts my molars I feel sick yeah some unique chemistry going on down hmm one more question to go to her questions I know more wing Bert you're done you're done you can cuddle it one more wait how did you make that but you know what Bert you're not off the hot seat because this one comes right at you Tom which of Bert's bits do you pretend to laugh at because you're a good and supportive friend but deep down you think is hacky and once you get a friend to tell them I leave the link don't answer not try to think y'all do something for you real quick yeah well my kids are dumb as [ __ ] my daughter doesn't run me through some other businessman my wife farted during oral sex fire in the hole how's it going I like to spread them out when in doubt spread them out that's a good one yeah doing um pajamas my dad yeah that's relate but I was like you know you know hmm see uh I can tell you my answer hey no he didn't she's spirt leading the witness I mean I'm over the machine story he has had it with the machine story one of the greatest hits it's a greatest hit keep an eye out body shots world tour it doesn't stop doing an international run and then the fall dates Tom Segura take it down tickets on sale now visit Tom Segura calm Bert Bert Bert calm Tom Segura calm Bert Bert Bert calm great domain name to get a hold of the four birch was already taken that's it for truth our dad I felt that oh my god I almost threw up on that last one hey you know what I'm soaking wet when you tour internationally it's probably really good for your health yeah hey what's going on hot ones fans I hope that you enjoyed today's episode of truth there Deb I don't ask for much around here but you can see the pin comment below we've been nominated for a Webby it would mean a lot to the crew here if you could vote us on to win I know that it would mean the world to Tom and Sarah Honda Chris and perhaps most of all camera guy bill if you could throw us to subscribe and again don't do it for me do it for bill

Channel: First We Feast

Views: 5,450,235

Rating: 4.9344692 out of 5

Keywords: First we feast, fwf, firstwefeast, food, food porn, cook, cooking, chef, kitchen, recipe, cocktail, bartender, craft beer, complex, complex media, Cook (Profession)sean evans, bert kreischer, bert kreischer hot ones, bert kreischer hot wings, tom segura, tom segura hot ones, tom segura hot wings, tom seguga and burt kreischer, the last dab, last dab, sean evans, the final dab, truth or dab, first we feast truth or dab, the last dab reduxx, hot sauce, hot wings challenge

Id: xCvSAeaqeFY

Length: 16min 27sec (987 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 18 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/AGMarasco]

I always enjoy it when Bert starts laughing

Someone: tells joke that is at least mildly funny

Bert:

faces reddens into a cherry tomato

wheezing

unintelligible noises

high-pitch squeaking sound

[u/SweetWaterSurprise]

I enjoyed this as much if not more than a standard Hot ones Episode.

[u/spice_of_life13]

Who was the guest on Bert's podcast that was irish?

[u/what_ok]

That was hilarious. I love how many questions to Bert were totally easy and the question for Tom were just career/marriage ending

[u/JohnyUtah_]

Who's that fat racist on the show with Tom Segura?

[u/ComradeCooter]

Anyone catch what Bert whispered in Tom's ear?

[u/MPK49]

It's entirely possible that these guys are in a weight loss battle against eachother

[u/russell_m]

burnt chrysler is fat

[u/zipzog]

I thought they were going to smoke dabs and try to get each other super stoned until I realized what channel it was for.