The Sun & a hot take à la cosmo

[Music] hey guys what's up and welcome back to my channel so today we are going to talk about something that surprisingly enrages me so this is just a brand new episode of things that make julia lose her mind now i've talked about this before in terms of cosmopolitan magazine we've talked about their very questionable takes their very questionable ethics morals or lack thereof you know sometimes you look at a garbage can and you wonder what's in there well that's basically what i thought when i saw an article by none other than the sun the biggest of all garbage cans and i was like okay surely shirley and don't call me shirley airplane they can't have a worse take than what i've seen before because cosmopolitan is bad enough and i didn't really think it could get a lot worse although the sun is trash the takes i've seen are at the bottom of the barrel surely it can't get worse and yet here we are i would suggest getting a stress ball maybe like plates you can break something you can throw a wall you can punch through just in terms of preparing for the absolute depravity we're about to experience however to begin on a more positive note which does not require a stress ball i did want to thank today's sponsor which is billy billy creates high quality razors for a reasonable price not only does billy provide a smooth shave but the razor is also encased in charcoal which is a great detoxifier also you know how razors get clogged and you need to constantly clean them out within the same shaving session while billy leaves more space between the blades to avoid clogging i personally enjoy billy's razors because of the moisturizing element of the charcoal along with a smooth shave that doesn't require multiple passes over the same spot it also is great for harder to reach places like your ankles another thing i enjoy about billy apart from the very fair price point is the fact that it gives a super clean shave which gives you that sensation of extra cleanliness which i really like of course it also saves time because there's nothing more frustrating than having to pass over the same area over and over again and then not get the result you want the price is just nine dollars for a starter kit which comes with two blades and then nine dollars for four cartridges whenever you need them and it's all delivered at your door for half the price of a typical drugstore razor but with better quality you can get billy's starter kit for nine dollars with shipping just click the link at the top of my description thank you billy for sponsoring this video as i mentioned prior i think it's common knowledge that the sun is trash but every so often you just can't stop yourself from looking kind of like when you see an accident on the side of the road you just have to look turn up the cheat all women should have an affair once in their life it made me feel sexier and look younger now you might be thinking julia haven't we covered this before and the answer is yes the reason that it's alarming to me is that not only has it become a relatively common theme for articles to talk about the prose of cheating but aside from that this was pretty recent it was march 16th 2021 in our year of the lord and savior 2021 still we have this depraved deranged point of view being spouted out as if it's not really in its essence kind of psychopathic because what you're saying when you're saying it's okay to cheat is that you're saying hey hurt someone's feelings potentially traumatize them and it's fine because we're women if you think having an affair is an absolute no-go for you think again you are massively missing out nothing beats the buzz of sneaking around behind a partner's back or the rush of adrenaline from the fear of being caught in the act it is laughable how they try to pass this off as like an adrenaline junkie type thing like if you want adrenaline jump out of a plane drive really fast at one of those like traps or whatever but this for adrenaline and the thing is like you're selling it as this fun just whimsical quirky little you thing but are we forgetting the other person in this relationship most of these articles as we know are focused on hetero relationships so here it's about women cheating and just discounting how the man is gonna feel and it's like you really are laughing and being kind of gleeful about hurting someone's feelings make that not sound psychopathic to me like i really don't know how to make that sound like a normal person thing because genuinely imagine another article being like hey talk [ __ ] behind your best friend's back you'll get such a buzz from it would that sound normal to you would that sound like something you should do would that sound like something you should be proud of but i'm confused every woman should try it at least once in their lives more than a quarter of women who cheat feel more attractive 22 percent feel younger according to a study by affairs website elisacounters.com well i'm glad alyssa encounters the king of all trustworthy information has decided that you feel 22 younger why would alyssa encounters lie about that would it not help their business to make people think that cheating is a good thing so lying would also be a good thing but no totally trustworthy great source so glad you mentioned it and that comes as no surprise to me my affair made my skin glow and i felt both youthful and energized i didn't need botox or gym membership when i had my bit on the side i was in a steady but mundane relationship with james asterisk because the names are changed when my head was turned four years ago by a married man at work it was not as though i was looking to cheat but after a year with james the initial spark had fizzled out in the early days he lavished me with meals in fancy restaurants bought me flowers and made me feel like the center of his universe i had never met a man like him who was completely obsessed with my happiness the usual thing that i'm always gonna say is have the uncomfortable conversation if your partner is not satisfying you in one way or another in whatever realm whether it's the bedroom realm whether it's communication whether whatever have a conversation you don't have to go after a married man you don't have to cheat to get this weird kind of elation you don't have to do any of that you're doing all these extra steps before taking the first basic step which is talk to them resolve it or if you can't resolve it break up or if not decide to have an open relationship if that's something they're okay with decide to be polyamorous if you can find a partner who has the same kind of mindset as you do like there are so many other options as opposed to just deciding to hurt someone because you're not happy at the moment let alone when you've not even communicated that you're not happy with something people are not going to read your mind in my opinion the honeymoon phase is a phase where i think everyone is more giddy and more you know like more butterflies more nervousness blah blah because it's new but i don't think the honeymoon phase has to end in fact i don't think it ends for me the honeymoon phase is more the phase of where i was like anxious and stressed out not in a bad way but just because you're getting to know someone but that phase can continue so long as you communicate what makes you happy and what satisfies you because if you do that the honeymoon phase can go on forever so long as you are open to discussing things it's because you choose to not communicate that that honeymoon phase of the first year that she was describing died it's because you stopped explaining what makes you happy now obviously i don't know who this james person is but if you do not communicate and expect people to read your mind it's not only not going to happen most likely but it's also toxic and shitty that you expect someone to know exactly what you want without verbalizing it and then you don't verbalize it and just decide to go and cheat and then hurt their feelings for something you never even brought up to them in what world does that make sense without warning though cracks began to show i cannot put my finger on exactly when or why it happened but the fun nights out became boring nights and i felt invisible when james did not have his head buried in his phone he was on his games console i was 38 and could feel my youth and confidence slipping away i gained about two stone in weight finding comfort in chocolate and cake yet the more i tried to talk to james about how i was feeling the more he clammed up now we don't know to what extent she talked to him maybe she communicated everything though it's very doubtful considering the tone of this article but if you do communicate everything and if your partner decides to not even try leave be a single woman that's all you have to do so you're not cheating on anyone you're not hurting anyone there's no expectation like there is such a thing as just living a single life if i tried to spice up our sex life with sexy underwear and killer heels he spurned my advances sometimes i caught him looking at other women in the street so when andrew also a fake name began flirting with me on a work night out i felt flattered he was 10 years younger than me and estranged from his wife now in all of this i also wonder is there any point where we ask how james was feeling because as much as she was unsatisfied there's no part of this article that refers to what he was feeling because maybe he was feeling unsatisfied in a certain way which was why he was acting a certain type of way has to be a two-way street you both have to have your opportunity to speak up and if you don't speak up that's on you after a few drinks we ended up back at his place having incredible passionate sex which lasted longer than james 10 minutes this i just find really gross and i know it's the sun so what did i expect unnecessary and inappropriate to compare the sex life you had with your significant other to the person you cheated on especially because in her own words at the beginning she was saying how it's like different and exciting and blah blah because you're scared of getting caught so you can't compare apples and oranges and even if you could why would you be that shitty to berate someone like that in such a vulnerable and private way i had never experienced a rush like it and as we lay together afterwards planning our next secret rendezvous i felt alive for the first time in years going back to face james after was not easy but having spontaneous mind-blowing sex with andrew was all i could think about and it erased the guilt i became meticulous about covering my tracks and the prospect of being caught out became part of the thrill being caught was part of the thrill having your partner be devastated that you broke your loyalty you betrayed them you went behind their back all of that is a thrill but i genuinely believe this to be like psychopathic behavior like i really don't use the term loosely but someone who is so excited about potentially getting caught or avoiding getting caught which would result in someone's heartbreak that's exciting to you like to me that sounds like you're not doing that well to me that sounds like it's a bigger problem than just your relationship to me it sounds like self-esteem issues a number of other issues but to me that does not sound like this empowered girl boss whatever it does it it sounds sad and desperate and disgusting i don't know what of this is supposed to make anyone feel empowered or happy about who they are as a person andrew and i met up whenever we could without raising suspicion i put a lock code on my phone so james could not check my messages and i always made sure it was on silent mode i even concocted a story about how i had enrolled on an evening dress making course so i could get out of the house another time i conspired with a friend who called me to arrange a night out while james was in earshot instead of meeting her i went to see andrew this is the other side of this that i don't understand is like why are you boasting about this like why is this a point of pride like is this what you bring up when you go to cocktail parties hey guys guess what i'm in a committed relationship but i really enjoy the prospect of potentially hurting them and breaking their heart but it gives me such a thrill to just go sleep with someone who by the way is also married so i just don't understand how this is something to be like proud of this is something that should be deeply shameful and deeply regretted although the deceit made me feel guilty in the beginning i pushed it aside sex with andrew was fun and spontaneous and i could not get enough whether it was in the hotel room or on the back seat of his car one time we had sex in my living room in the middle of the day when james was at work i drew the line at doing it in james's bed because changing the sheets would have made him suspicious wow imagine having such a wild sex life that you do it in the living room and not only that in the middle of the day how crazy wild andrew made me feel young and sexy again and unlike james he complimented me constantly at a time when i needed it most like many women as they get older i'd become insecure about my body and needed a boost i bought lacy laundry from ann summers being careful to destroy the receipts and we had the type of wild passionate sex you see in films going beyond the missionary position and getting out of my sex comfort zone was invigorating i lost all my inhibitions when we were together small sex in most movies to me looks terrible because there's no i'm not going to get into that but the way that this is being described to me sounds like someone who was deeply unhappy and not only with their own private life like it seems like there was some unhappiness like mentioning feeling old and not sexy and things like that that's something that is of course it can be worsened by your partner if they don't make you feel a certain type of way but it's also a very internal thing like your self-image your self-worth how you view yourself is a very internal thing it's something i struggle with myself so i know that it's internal so putting it all on james i also don't think is fair also if you didn't communicate it so i think the problem here is a lot deeper than just like oh my love life wasn't the way i wanted it to be it sounds like there was and maybe is a bigger issue at hand and i don't mean that as shade i mean that in a relatable way where i think most of us have had feelings of being ugly or gross or you don't want to look at yourself in the mirror i don't know if this was just some kind of replacement for that in time andrew patched things up with his wife and called time on our affair it had lasted three incredible months i missed the rush of endorphins and by this time my relationship with james was sexless and dead three months on after two years together james ended things two he had no idea about my affair or if he did he did not show his suspicions maybe he was getting his kicks elsewhere too i did not fall apart when our relationship ended because my affair with andrew had shown me i deserved better although i've been on dates since i'm 46 now and still searching for the one which has been tough during the pandemic and in a small place like preston of course i would much sooner be in a happy relationship with a man who fulfills all my needs and worships the ground i walk on but i could not rule out cheating again this is like the most insane thing to me is that she cheated she apparently got some crazy kind of high from cheating and she says she wants to be happy with someone but then she says she could cheat again and my question is what if the shoe or on the other foot what if when you are in that happy fulfilled relationship someone the person you're with has the same mindset as you and instead of communicating how you feel they just decide to cheat on you is that gonna be okay as well because the rules have to be the same for everyone you can't decide that you can cheat no one else can so i'm just wondering what are the rules then just wondering so women never say never to infidelity because if you're being taken for granted and your fellow will not listen then it is fair game menchie all the time so why can't we it's a good thing i've done grounding exercises in the past few weeks because truly i could lose my goddamn [ __ ] so first of all just because men do it as if men are the exclusive owners of cheating okay but aside from that if you are in a relationship where you feel like the person doesn't treat you properly or if you're taken for granted there's this thing called conversations and then there's this other thing called breaking up so i don't understand this continuous push for staying in shitty relationships but cheating on the side as if it balances out i don't know i don't know and i'm annoyed you guys can let me know we think in the comments down below thank you guys so much for watching thank you to my patrons as always let's get right into the fan art you

Channel: READY TO GLARE

Views: 91,586

Rating: 4.9718456 out of 5

Keywords: cosmopolitan, cosmo magazine, the sun, relationship advice, love life

Id: vjZ7CcLCbak

Length: 18min 28sec (1108 seconds)

Published: Mon May 17 2021