The Catastrophic Body Language of 90-Day Fiancé Crushes My Soul | Nonverbal Analyst Reacts

well hey there idiots welcome back to observe in today's video i'm going to be analyzing the nonverbal communication of a compilation of the show 90 day fiance my wife went and found a whole pile of video clips to be able to work from so today is going to be based largely off of the universal emotions that everybody has with some flash based lining as well in there but this is going to be gauged largely towards having a good time enjoying other people's dumpster fire lives so we'll go ahead and run through this and as things go on i'll give you my opinions from an analyst standpoint and just try to maintain my sanity as things continue on let's go ahead and roll the little intro thingy [Music] now i'm not totally certain as to which years we're working through or which people were working through i haven't seen any of this footage before for this specific analysis there's the possibility maybe that i've seen some sprinkled around on the internet but this is the first time i'm seeing this this is probably the first time you'll be seeing this so let's just have a good time all the way around with this why did you i'm not that wealthy to like compensate for all of the things that you like that are really expensive that you want like right now those things no i mean eventually i can get them but you want everything like today i mean today i told you like you wanted something why can't you okay so her face is going to be difficult to read because she obviously has some sort of cosmetic work done as far as i can tell so far they're they must be talking about personal wealth or belongings or something along those lines and she's showing a lot of agitation behaviors needless to say so far and he's trying to convince her of something that i i'm already quite certain that this is not going to go too well just from the basic feeling that we're getting from these people let's see what happens [Music] you seem upset yeah because uh i don't understand why i you voted but you still don't have anything i had a big home and i had cars and all that that's that's what can happen in divorce i have to say what chaotic camera angles it's like they're being spied upon from miles away um so we're seeing a good bit this would be an example of frustration non-verbally also i want to be able to let you know that a lot of this since it is filmed as a reality tv show a lot of this has been done once before or it's heavily coached or heavily scripted so we're gonna have to look at that and take that into consideration as we go on that a lot of this that we're going to see in general is going to be fairly forced just due to the nature of the programming so it's not going to be hugely educational for you but we could still at least just watch this this this this divorce yes before not now you have to think out you have to think about you have to talk about your past i don't want to hear anything you asked me why don't you have well i'm explaining to you why his voice is increasing his pitch and his tone are increasing that means that he's getting more and more stressed as you hear somebody's tone increase in their pitch increase and you can hear the strain on their vocal cords that's an indicator of agitation means that they're getting less and less happy about the situation so he's becoming more and more desperate she doesn't care how desperate he's getting about it he's talking about the past rather in the future blah blah blah let's keep watching you think most americans have money that's not true yeah i see no well that's only on tv so with that smile where she's saying yeah i see that now it's heavily driven by disgust you can tell by the corners of her nose there and also the throwing of her eyebrows now obviously they're outside sunshine is going on so you could see that the eyebrows are furrowed anyways but she's pretty disgusted with the lack of money that this gentleman has which is probably something they should have covered earlier on but again it's 90 day fiance so there's not a lot of time to cover this early on yeah economic down and bank everything was really you don't have any safety money for emergency money if you want somebody that already has a million dollars in the bank i'm sorry i don't yeah every every lady wants yes and are you sure you can take every lady out there do you want a million dollars in the bank i don't know if that's limited to ladies uh i would also like a million dollars in the bank but she's having difficulty explaining how she's feeling to this guy because he's he's so defensive i'm sure we're gonna try yes then i'm sure ooh strong disgust look there so you can tell that by the movement of the corner of her mouth here raising up a little bit narrowing of the eyes looking away there's a small eye roll in there as well if you see this in any sort of conversation that you're having with your significant other friend family relations so on and so forth that conversation's not going well you have to find a new approach he's i something gives me a feeling he's not going to find a new approach but he should he should find a new approach that i'm sure of okay i'm going to do whatever it takes to make this thing disgust mixed with contempt and anger this would be scorned to disgust and contempt i don't care what happens from this point on it's highly unlikely that they are going to last the i don't know if they'll even last the 90 days beyond that but this is not going super well at all that's your job not mine i know because you are i am you already if you don't take care of me let's just say bye my sisters don't take care of me uh just say bye yeah actually you know what i don't know if that's totally fair it's not really balanced or anything like that doesn't sound like a partnership kind of sounds like something else but oh well uh so that was fun that's fun we're gonna go ahead and move on to a new couple it looks like i don't know the situation with this i don't know what's going on with any of this so we're about to just kind of find out together that they think that i've changed a lot since we started dating each other what about it so during this time she has a lot of halting in her phrasing which means that she's measuring her words very specifically she also has a lot of blinking psychological processing she's trying to figure out a way to say possibly harsh thing in a nice way you can probably catch yourself doing the same exact thing or you've seen somebody doing it as well it's very common so we're about to see how he's going to react so far from what i can tell it's not super hot so let's find out they're concerned because they're like well drinking water raising eyebrows looking off to the side he doesn't care what she's saying about his character which i don't know if that's super good somebody has a criticism about your character it's better to listen but uh we'll we'll see we'll see how this happens i told them that you're not into like girls night necessarily and nothing about girls they're like so he's not gonna let you so a very massive expression of confusion frustration perhaps a little bit of disgust when corners of his nose have activity in there so he's feeling confused and disgusted by whatever she's talking about with the girls night thing so i don't know if this is something that they had in their history that they were talking about before uh but he's frustrated by it and disgusted by it that's what i can see so far you'll like go out with us or whatever and i'm like no let me finish i'm like no but he feels he should that's a specific gesture where they go like this that thing that's usually a frustration gesture it's also based out of self-soothing people will do those oral movements like that for self-soothing gestures regardless he's not happy not happy that she said no let me finish that was also accompanied by the sudden closing of the mouth and sitting back lightly so he's taken aback and frustrated rather offended that she interrupted him let's see what happens go with you like the man should go with you and they're like how are we going to just be our like girls and just like go out with each other listen at that point when i said it but there was no girls night where i forbid you like to go out inside me when i told you like not to go out i said no like probably but you stop with it right let me explain [Laughter] okay so you can see on her eyes that he's walking on extremely thin ice right now just note to whoever's out there and in a relationship never say that you forbid the other person from doing anything because you'll come across as a dick so just just don't and i'm hoping i don't know but i'm hoping she goes off just a tiny bit but i'm not sure so we'll find out here in a second regardless that's just terrible don't don't say that you listen to me all right oh she's got a lot of disgust coming in there and her lip compression and you can even see it flashing in the corner of her nose she has a lot of disgust in regards to that no no duh very very obvious many people would have discussed if somebody said i forbid you to do something it's kind of a kind of a dick move accept you going with your sisters i'm not gonna forbid you like to go you know like in between your family i will never do that family for me like it's just the most important but you know like you're not gonna go out like till four o'clock one more morning and just come out like you want to go that's not an option you want to go i want to go to but you cannot go together but if you want to have something special and it's like a girls night you can go but you have an obligation towards me because i'm worried about you and you're going to come in time you're not going to go like you stop me in the back like that's not happening andre why that's like a girl's night we'll be celebrating we'll you know probably go to clubs or bars or whatever that i'm engaged and i'm about to say club you're gonna go to a club really not like a dirty club but like to dance with my kind of getting a little bit of insecurity from this guy um he's showing aggression in areas that there shouldn't be too much aggression in and that's usually based off of somebody who's feeling threatened in an area when there's unfitting aggression in this area so he has some aggression towards her going out and having drinks or having a good time with her friends and that's usually based off of some form of insecurity not always obviously but that's what those aggression signals that he's showing right during this time would make the most sense for otherwise he's just angry at her for existing and going out to clubs which doesn't make as much sense but let's keep watching really you're going to go to a club and it's like on your bachelorette sounds stupid i guess yeah so i can't go celebrate with my girlfriend just listen think about the think about the fact just listen line is one of my least favorite lines this is not the most elegant way of trying to communicate your point and many people obviously will say things in an argument that they don't mean but he's now done this repeatedly and repeatedly and repeatedly i don't know why she's wanting to stick around is my biggest question probably because of the reality tv show but like at this point my question is why are you there like why why would you stick around with that sort of behavior just go ahead and find somebody who's not so self-centered and insecure it probably will do better for you you'd go to a restaurant you're gonna have a bottle of proseccos like with your parents have a supper together like that suffer don't you want me to have fun you don't put me dumbbell standards i'm explaining it one more time you're going to be married like soon it doesn't matter you're a woman that was a mess that was rough it actually brings to mind there was this time that my wife and i were going for a dinner back in one of the cities that we were living in and there was this couple that was just across the way we were sitting there pleasantly having this nice basted chicken wonderful meal but a lot of our enjoyment of the meal was distracted from because across the way there was a couple that was having a very heated and very audible argument that gives off very similar vibes to this very uncomfortable display man this is just a mess and we're not halfway through there's so much more mess to get through uh looks like we're back over to this couple again let's see what's happening now what so basically you're saying if i can't provide i'm worthless to you i don't understand what's wrong about it if i would if you can't provide you're worthless to me i don't know if that's the best mindset that kind of feels a little entitled there but you can tell from her initial expression one it's hard to be able to read like i said because of the cosmetic stuff that she has done but she's holding a very very intense gaze without blinking and that's a defiance gesture whenever anybody's holding that strong of the gaze with that specific for her partial expression that means that you're not going to find much wiggle room in that conversation she's not going to wiggle around on her side of things or or bend too much she's pretty well said that if he can't provide then he means nothing to her and nothing's wrong with that according to her so that's exciting let's go ahead and uh let's let's keep watching to see how this goes it's going to go well i'm sure ugly and fat would you be dating me whoa okay um i don't know if that's her saying that he's but that's that's rough anyways uh anyway if you were who you are [Music] listen i don't want to see you here such chaotic body language on this show the entire time it's just like amplified up to 10 the whole time and i know that that's partially due to the coaching of the show i've heard some behind the scenes of shows like this where they're like we need you to go out there and be as dramatic as possible uh to make it entertaining for people so there's that possibility but boy are they doing a good job and a lot of it's synchronized with what they're saying so they're not really lying with what they're showing it might just be a little bit over the top but my goodness anymore okay you are not welcome here you understand that i have things to do take your stuff and leave you are not welcome here our marriage you have not been an active partner spouse to me since we got married i believe in marriage and take care of that my vows okay so what i'm gathering is that this this couple is married already and i don't i don't even i don't even care i don't even care never say you're not welcome here to your spouse significant other relationship just don't wow yeah you're not welcome here and i have things to do is extremely rude from what i'm telling a lot of these guys need to little slip slap right there like that's extremely rude stuff to say to anybody especially the person that you're supposed to be married to or dating like that's a nightmare wow oh yes i don't want to hear you i married you because i loved you and because i care so he has obvious disgust on his face while he's turning away also it's pretty hard to miss as he's saying i don't want to hear this and turns away and walks away in the middle of her sentence i know nothing about her so far but from what i'm seeing from him he has some pretty substantial ego issues let's keep watching you could take this too so you know how serious this is that was nice of you you were user muhammad you used me you told me what i wanted to hear okay this would be the classic expression of anger to its full-blown extent you'll see the bottom chin jutting out some the narrowing of the eyes the lowering and furrowing of the brow the pointing these are all very overt aggression signals if you see this anywhere then things are about to go down i don't know if it's going to be a physical altercation here but if you see this in your personal life be prepared for it to go physical because it it's a very small nudge away from that so just keep that in mind but woof hold on heston wait you can't just drag her around well i need you to like pay attention what why do you just stare at me like that okay so this is already i know that this is going to be messy just due to the fact that there's a child brought in and you can tell that their mindsets are different even from this teeny tiny blip here there's there's something that's different in their mindset so this is going to be this is going to be messy i'm i'm oh my goodness don't tell me what to do so you can hear the t's really coming out that enunciation that over enunciation is something that's also very common in aggression and anger that don't tell me what to do that side of things that sort of enunciation and alliteration is going to be more common in times that people are extremely frustrated and angry and trying to amplify that without raising their voice that's where you'll hear that come in let's keep watching insane don't tell you what to do please just stop because that's don't iterate you know i don't know how to see it never never yeah look at you okay so he and i'm assuming in that specific culture it's probably rude to have an argument out in public but man these are just so messy all of these this entire concept of this show is just it's a dumpster fire all the way through like oh my oh my okay so it looks like we're back with this couple again uh we'll see when we left off with it it felt like from what they showed they weren't going to last we'll see if that alters or changes or does anything maybe they worked it out maybe that was a really garbage area and they work it out let's uh let's find out you're not fine you say you want to stay you're not fine i'm fine that that's no that's that's a no i'm not fine so if you ever say that to your significant other you say you're obviously not fine and they say i'm fine but they have a micro movement no of the head which you can see here and then they look off break eye contact look away and have a contempt smile on their face that absolutely means they're not fine just keep your eye out for that because that is a very clear indicator that nothing's fine nothing's fine at all and he has moral or intellectual superiority about it as well which just means that he not only is not fine but he also believes himself and whatever argument that we're about to see to also be in the right so let's go ahead and see what happens here what's about me all right i'll go sit over there i'm here for who i'm here for you you're not here for yourself i sleep on the floor tonight oof that was messy as well so his expression during that time is constant contempt he feels aloof in that situation morally or intellectually superior and so when he asked that question you're not here for you he has an overt expression of confusion because he knows and she gets caught out in that so her pitch increases and her tone increases and the fragility of her voice increases to where she's i'm here for me too and that's an indicator of strain and agitation in her side of things so that was a little tick on his argument belt but that entire thing is not a good dynamic um at all if they stick together they're gonna need some form of therapy um i'm gonna need some form of therapy let's keep watching she's like you you i'm here not what you talking about david [Music] are you okay you are into no it's the answer to that question are you okay and you can see that she's having a hard time wrestling back whatever emotion she's feeling there's a little bit of disgust coming in there also with the furrowing of the eyebrows it's not burrowing down and inward as if it were anger it's more furrowing just together maybe lightly upward which could be a sign of grief or pain somewhere in there emotional turmoil so she's not okay but it went ahead and did hard cut i'm wondering if they cut away to give her coaching or if that's just the cut of this compilation let's find out wow why are you drinking when she says don't i don't nail her y'all got to get this together you need to tell him why is that not something that's 124. it doesn't matter how old i am because i understand you because i understand i don't like this guy um one of my least favorite arguments for anything is how old are you um because that assumes that with years you gain intelligence so the how old are you in this side of things should just never be used it's a lazy argument so the fact that he used that argument i just don't i don't like him i'm going to try to ignore that to try to stay unbiased but this is just a reaction so i don't care too much let's keep watching the way that it works i don't know who the guy is in the pinky plaid shirt but he's just like mr man in his black shirt over here he's very confident in himself very egotistical not really willing to hear any other sides of an argument oddly enough the other person she's staying pretty quiet or just as far as non-verbals go pretty inactive let's see if that changes here question 25. by the way she's way more mature than you age means nothing is nothing does lourdes know that you're back with them i feel like she just kind of wanted that whole situation to be over as did probably most of us and the guy in the plaid shirt he wanted it to be over as soon as it started yeah when is the last time so something interesting to note with her during this specific time so they're sitting together right he has his arm around and this is obviously lightly posed but it's the smaller movements that are in this that are going to be more telling and you can see instead of her sitting with her body towards him as if they were being close together she's sitting with as much defensive positioning as she can in regards to him even though they're sitting close together they are touching his arm is around her she doesn't want to be there i don't know what they're about to talk about here but she's not super happy to be positioned that way and it's showing through just the smaller movements of things let's keep watching see what happens i don't know was it when you went to the divorce lawyers what do you mean um no i went what no i didn't what's the problem so i'm gathering that he went to divorce lawyers behind her back you could tell that he's been caught out in a bad situation here by the blanking of his face right here when she says when you went to the divorce lawyers and he's just like what do you mean i didn't do that so now we're getting to see things actually kind of play to its fruition he's gone behind her back to divorce lawyers for something and the now i don't want to be here in this position that we got from her earlier through the subtler movements are pretty overt now it's really hard to miss the movements now but let's see how this goes what's the following no i didn't know that i didn't go to no lawyers what are they talking about i'm thinking i didn't go to no lawyer what are they talking about the biggest issue with this is the desynchronization on his face his eyes remain pretty dead during that time even though he is saying i didn't go to no lawyer what are they talking about the non-verbal desynchronization is what would lend me to believe that it's not fully credible not fully authentic i wouldn't know just based off of that small little flash of whether or not he's genuinely lying but it would be a tick towards he's not being fully authentic so i'd have to explore more regardless she uh she doesn't care she's not like oh i have to find out a baseline she knows so she's not impressed let's keep going i'm filing for divorce i wonder if the proximity of your separation to them is this i think this is the meeting with the lawyers so now we know now we know that the little tiny micro movements that we saw genuinely did mean that he was in fact lying because there's video footage of it oh my god what did actual receipt of the green card affects its validity right i didn't go to the lawyers i went to the lawyers with you i didn't go to no lawyers i went to the lawyers with you and you can feel that drop off in tone drop off in pitch drop off in force behind the words and that shows that he's not confident in his words this is something that will happen in people who are being deceitful and aren't good at it they will have that subtle drop off at the very very end where they're feeling less confident and it shows up quite clearly he has it quite clearly in there so if she knows anything about body language or if she has a strong intuition in regards to it then she knows that he's lying at this point but let's keep watching why can't you just admit what happened what what am i gonna need what am i gonna admit so what happened nothing happened you went to lawyers still having trouble enunciating well and and projecting well nothing happened that lack of force behind his words is an indicator of his own insincerity or at least his own insecurity and what he's saying basically aka he's lying you talk about getting a divorce from me no i didn't yeah i did it's up to nancy everybody would have 100 kids nancy loves children i mean you have to think about all those i mean years that you would come down and you know be with us for weeks and you did get a lot of help dad so if i have kids you will help me what i mean if i have students you can know me that's a big if who are you having kids with it's not that david jade you mean he is from november anymore [Music] david the guy name he's trying with all of his might to communicate that stop talking now look i don't think it's going to work because we're on reality tv this is so uncomfortable this is so uncomfortable all the way around oh my gosh david can't have children did he tell you about his vasectomy yeah you tell me that yeah she knows okay at 49 without a career you would restart with a brand new baby we have talked about it if it's possible to do the reversal yes jbt has promised me and my family over there to have the kid i definitely don't think my dad should have any more children he was not always there for us growing up so i doubt it would be any different for the next child do we think it's a smart choice for you to have kids right now i mean next i got three man this is really messy oh yeah yeah this is not good to have both i believe it's his sister and his daughter are saying this is a horrible idea that should be a red flag in a relationship if the family of your partner is saying they should never have kids might be time to start asking some questions in that relationship wow man this is not looking good for them isn't that plenty for you you got grandkids you can help raise yeah but it's not mine well they are it's yours too your family now i mean not my kid i think annie's just adamant to have a child and kind of doing it with whomever i know she's married to dad but he might not be the person to give for that child right now and you know she really should have thought about that we're not trying to criticize you but you're asking to borrow money for rent and here you're talking about starting a new fit but she doesn't like me that oh we're about to get to big ed here this is going to be an adventure i've seen some of big ed these other people i'm not as familiar with regardless that whole entire previous situation as far as nonverbal so you can pick up on those that was so messy people trying to be forthright but also not just destroy a person's happiness is always interesting i'm i'm excited for big ed this was a mess when i've seen the little blips that i've seen of him these have been woof can i have a kiss beard it's hurt on me ouch really oh yeah really okay here's the deal what um don't be mad at me but um [Music] last night when i noticed that your legs were kind of like mine they were hairy well so um there's some contempt and disgust on her face as he's like hey your legs were hairy i want you to i'm assuming he's going to say i want you to shave that's the next logical step but she doesn't appreciate that understandably if you shave your legs i'll shave my beard why they shave my legs leg hair it just seems kind of less feminine for a woman so it yeah i don't like leg hair it's gross it's fine to not like leg hair but who cares whose leg hair is where and what come on ed really like come on i would agree with her disgust and contempt in this part like so it's soft your legs will be soft like my skin come on either that or you kiss me oh that's not good either don't manipulate your way into a kiss yeah i agree with her on this front oh my god oh this is so messy people watch this for enjoyment ugh i'm dying oh okay hey guys okay okay okay i wait for you i have a favor what the favor so there's a test that you can take you test me no yeah a te it's a it's a test for um for um i don't know if you understand it's um std which is um i think it's a blood test and they just test to see um if you have comes like sexually transmitted disease so that so i was asking if you're willing to take that test i'll never ask you another question about your past [Music] it's at that moment where he was like i've made a mistake this was the bad thing to ask also looking at her face here she's got her contempt and disgust slipping back into this i don't know if big ed and her still continued on beyond this point but from this look it doesn't look super good it's not looking super hot for their dynamic once again characterized by disgust and contempt i think there's like two seconds left oh there's five seconds left let's watch it [Music] disappointing that's where we're going to wrap up this little one that's the end of the compilation i think there's going to be more of this because i feel like this could be fun and despite its just total chaos and all of it it's much more refreshing for me to go through something that's not centered around youtube drama or some sort of brutal criminal acts so i appreciate this i hope you appreciated this as well all in all 90 day fiance is arguably one of the worst ideas for a show trying to cram two people together within 90 days man it's pretty much guaranteed to just be mess after mess after mess it reminds me almost of bible college dating but oh my oh my lord that was rough that was a rough time if you have any suggestions for more of these because i do have some more planned and i will be doing a couple more but if you have specific people or specific shows that are on i think it's tlc that you would like me to take a look at i was also considering maybe the bachelor bachelorette realm as well because i've heard that that's messy there's a whole bunch of messy shows and there's a whole bunch of messy body language in there as well so i hope you enjoyed looking at these and watching these and watching my soul slowly leave my body and descend deep into hell but it like i said it was refreshing so if you think of something else that you would like me to be able to see in this round go ahead and let me know in the comments below if you did like this video go ahead and let me know by hitting the like button hit subscribe if you haven't already hit the bell follow the links in the description below we are now officially partnered with the emotional intelligence academy over in the uk so if you're interested in non-verbal training and would like to be able to receive some from some of the top experts in the world go ahead and head over to the eia group.com and at checkout if you're going through any courses other than the diploma and the master's degree if you enter in the code observe at checkout you get 10 off which is honestly a pretty healthy discount on a lot of these courses so consider doing that if you're interested in what i do and would like to do something similar but but without further ado that's all that i've got for the day my name is logan and you have been oh so awesome as you always are and i will see you in the next video cheers guys that was a mess oh my gosh wow okay okay now i've gotta go like shower after that one scene with uh the drunk guy in the pool or whatever it was there's so much more to that it is awful

Channel: Observe

Views: 422,022

Rating: 4.9523754 out of 5

Keywords: Logan Portenier, Observe, Mentalist, Lie to Me, body language, nonverbal, psychology, React, Analysis, lying, detection, reading, behavior

Id: IiE4LTeEIzo

Length: 34min 54sec (2094 seconds)

Published: Fri May 21 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/MyBad79]

Where can I see this? Dr. Honda gets a little boring.

[u/trv11]

“Chaotic camera angles” So fucking true 😂

[u/AshtonKechamall]

He described so well Andrej. ( basically he doesnt give a shit what libby has to say)

[u/MyBad79]

Do I search for "Observe"?