The Best Teacher Stories On Reddit! [Compilation] (r/AskReddit)

what is the biggest butthole move that a teacher ever pulled on you or your class my high school English teacher suddenly required all papers and assignments that have been graded with the great written on them not a copy for the class be put together in a packet and turned back into her at the end of the year that was one week away I was one of the few that had all of them still because I never cleaned out my backpack but got an F anyways because they were not in order found out she did this because she lost her grade book she wasn't around the next year he made us fill out a form where you wrote personal information about yourself he said no one would read them except him there was even a special section where you could tell the teacher any really personal issues that would be just between him and you at the end of the year the teacher read everyone's forms out loud and made us guess who wrote them he even read my confidential personal section it was periodic day in my tenth grade English class and my partner didn't write his essay so I had nothing to peer at it my English teacher gave me an F for the day because I didn't submit a peer at it when I explained the situation she cackled Dan said not my problem I hated having to do group work because of things like this divvy up the responsibilities of the project three out of the five five people do their work but the whole group gets a crap mark because of it teacher it's not my fault your group members didn't contribute well don't punish the rest of us for them being lazy we had this foreign kid in algebra two honors it already dawned on us very early in the class and he knew it all and didn't really do much besides help other students when they needed it our teacher refused anything that hadn't been on it assignments and tests were to be done in pencil now throughout the school year this foreign kid would only use pen and subsequently failed all the assignments and tests which were of course correct in every way possible you could tell he didn't give two shoots because he really enjoyed helping us so what does she do starts failing everyone that's acquainted with him because he's setting a bad example the B was forced to Rea grade everything properly once we complained resulting in our grades being available to this late she didn't return the following year a 10th grade dance teacher assigned a research paper on a famous dance at our class I wrote one on Mikhail Baryshnikov and when we got them back she had written you plagiarized rewrite it or get a zero I came up to the teacher after class extremely upset because I had never played your eyes in my life I asked her if she had even checked my sources to see the information I had read in order to write the research paper and cited in my bibliography and all she could say was my aid a senior drill team member said she couldn't even understand some of the words you chose I went to the vice principal and she made the teacher Rae grade it I got an a but every time I think about that Dumbo's teacher my blood boils in the eighties I had a H s career counselor tell me that there was absolutely no future in computer programming it's weird my dad told me a similar thing happened to him for my GCSEs I asked my textiles teacher to put me in the higher ter paper more difficult with a chance of an AC grade she agreed when I turned up on exam day she'd put me in the foundation tier which meant the highest grade I could get was a C I was absolutely furious and when I confronted her about it she just shrugged and walked off my geography teacher did this with a guy everyone else was in for the higher tier but she put him in for foundation level he didn't find out until the day of the exam when he got his paper I suspected my English teacher disliked me because I was a smartass ed sarcastic kid in high school well I knew that but I actually suspected that it was affecting the way she graded my essays I was quite good at writing my thoughts out and always felt that I should have received better than the 68 72 percent range I kept getting had her two years in a row swapped essays with a friend for whom I edited his work and we both handed in each other's as our own he ended up with 92% and was featured in front of the class and I got 71 % we never told the principal for fear off I don't remember that we had a reason regardless I'd pee me off and I was happy to finally get a new teacher the following year Chim prof a is for God B is for me and c is for the best students in this class and the bastard was not kidding I hate professors that do this I went to Catholic school and had an art teacher that wouldn't give 100 s on any assignment because only God is perfect and giving a 100 on anything would be blasphemy teacher called me out you're in class in front of everyone asked me if I lost weight and when I said yes said well I bet you are Byul image you look Bureau afterwards holy frickin crap this is not okay my fourth grade teacher hated me for reasons unknown I was a quiet kid so I don't know what a deal was she used to watch me like a hawk and as soon as I made an error she pulled me up to the blackboard and shouted okay class bro dressed made an error in her math book just in case anyone else doesn't get IT will show you how it's done when anyone else did the same thing she just calmly said I have noticed some of you may have problems with whatever I'll show you my 7th and 8th grade math teacher would stand in the front of the class and point kids out and ask then how they were that stupid to not understand the material by the end of the year she made a girl break down and cry she ran out of the room to the bathroom where the teacher followed her in and continued to yell at her if she also made jokes about a black friend of mine then Amish people she just got an award for being the top teacher in our district but I thought my crazy ass math teacher was kidding when she said she won Teacher of the Year turns out that she really did first day of summer online class professor emails us to announce that the failure rate for this class is 93 percent also we have 50 days to do a team project to produce a minimum 250 page document on a fictional for our charity event worth 63 percent of your grade doesn't announce teams until end of first week previous semesters teams have produced documents in excess of 600 pages the real kicker is that we have to do it using Microsoft Project 2010 which er she emailed to tell us she would not explain or help with that NBD is not available anymore so we have to go to the on campus library in order to use it because we get points docked if we use the 2013 version 23 days and we're only 41 pages in I hear some of the other groups haven't started yet my HS physics teacher asked in front of the class if I was breastfed I said no I was adopted he responded with that explains a lot about you I responded with hey I heard you're living in a trailer now ex-wife pulled the long straw huh neither of us reported each other and he passed me up votes for not being a peon standing up for yourself when I was in elementary school we had a very strange teacher once a classmate spit on the feet of another the teacher made him wear a sign saying llama during the following recess another story once a student who came from a kind of poor family came to school with a shirt that has countless small holes on it she marked the holes with a pen on the shirt we were probably too young to know that this is very flicked up we only felt sorry for our classmates okay the llama thing would be pretty funny if it was with older kids but the holes in the shirt thing is really freaked up guidance counselor in high school meets with a group of us and asks each person what university or college they're planning to apply to and what program she offered advice to each person gets to me and says you'll be entering the workforce do you know what jobs you'll apply to I was P my grades weren't great then but why not talk to me about while something productive I was accepted to university did a post-grad and I'm doing a master's part-time while working full-time and then pulling straight as not much really sticks with me but knowing how she treated me means she probably does the same to others I have always thought about taking my degrees pay stub and job description to her and telling her she can't just make those assumptions freaking do it nothing makes me angrier than seeing people talk down to others about ambitions that's why I am becoming a teacher tired of seeing so many dreams crushed because of bad teaching counseling had a teacher throw erasers at us in eighth grade algebra class for being too stupid to learn math I threw the erasers back in year 10 an art substitute teacher threw an eraser at my friend because I asked her the teacher not to draw on my work she was insisting there was a shadow missing from a still-life thing I was drawing when there wasn't first grade I had to pee really badly I asked the teacher if I could go to the bathroom she said no held it in for about an hour but couldn't hold asked her again she said no or later I couldn't hold it in so I peed in my chair she got angry and told me to clean up my own mess so I cleaned up my own puddle after puberty I had a disorder that caused me to twitch similarly tutor a tez but it was just caused by the hormone change in my body I had a teacher yell at me in class saying I was making a scene and faking it she sent me to the office and I don't think she was a teacher much longer I also remember a sub in sixth grade calling us a bunch of little freaks we didn't see her again a history professor at my college gave us our midterm examined the next class we went over a question by question and graded another student's test we get to when did the Vietnam War begin and someone replied 1954 the professor says incorrect and everyone begins to mutter and talk among themselves finally someone says but the war did begin in 1954 people start to back him up that the professor stands up and yells the war began in 1959 I know this I know this because it's right there on the Vietnam Memorial the US wasn't involved until then so that's the only answer I'll accept he didn't even give partial credit for 1954 I had a teacher who gave the class in assignments to write an essay about why the war in Iraq was happening then he flunked all the essays that didn't agree with his own opinion which involved a mass conspiracy by mega-corporations brought an essay to her early to look over because I needed a good grade tailed me that it was good and met all the requirements and only gave me one small thing to change got it back two weeks later with a see similar thing happened to me the teacher actually told me that if I left the essay as is I would be guaranteed at least to be I worked on the things she told me I could improve got the essay back with Addie your best friend dying isn't an excuse from not doing your homework over the weekend he told people not to hang out with me because I was going nowhere in life I had teachers say things like that oddly enough I'm much more comfortable than the kids that were told that 10 years down the road if we lost a competition our physics teacher would make the losing team wear chicken masks and dance once at the end of the dance he said to me and like a chicken you'll never get laid with dancing like that with quite a lot of sincerity the whole class laughed what a dong fourth grade went to detention for saying the words yeast infection while in line going to lunch girl ratted me out had to go to D hall instead of recess to write a letter on what I did but didn't understand what I said or why freaked her my math teacher in high school pulled several gave me a detention for whispering when the whole basketball team was talking very loudly also threw a penny really hard at my head and said he just wanted to see how high it would bounce also the school pulled students from several elementary schools in the area when I asked him to explain a math problem he asked which school I was from took that as an explanation and didn't help me understand the problem my year 10 stroke 11 maths teacher always made fun of my handwriting in front of the whole class comments like when you're in your exam make sure the examiner will be able to read your writing I'm saying this especially for Theorem aruna corn and oh the grammar rona corn you should ask person sitting next to me for handwriting lessons so you'll actually pass this exam I gotta be so frickin harm ha your handwriting looks like everyone else's handwriting on this site I corrected my AP US history teacher on something really non nonchalantly that he should have known who the president before Lincoln was and he totally handled it poorly started yelling at me for making a fool of him in front of his class I had a teacher when I was in fifth grade who hated me she played favorites thought I plagiarized an essay it turned out I was just advanced for my age but I mean this was honors fifth grade why did she attack me fail any first and was generally insufferable she talked about her sex life openly to fifth grades well one day my mom and her had a meeting at the end of it she turns and soberly says I can't like every student yell wha what's the stupidest thing a teacher has tried to tell your child teach a once argued with me about how to pronounce my own ding named fourth-grade Jim health teacher told us that sleeping on your stomach causes stomach cancer that's funny my third grade gym teacher told me that biting chewing the inside of my cheeks a thinking habit I get from my mother would give me cancer I was utterly terrified until I went home to my mom and she told me it was a load of crap and then my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer some time later clearly that's what caused it I got an a large argument in seventh grade because my teacher wrote a test with the question being how many weeks are in a year he said the answer was 48 still get angry that I got that wrong me I am going to publish this essay on my FTP server so I can download it later but school librarian you are going to do what me I am going to put this on the Internet school librarian you can just put stuff on the Internet her concern was valid if you were still in school you were likely not old enough to have been able to acquire an internet publishing license I'm still saving up for mine my English teacher once told me that seperating was not a word I got told discombobulated wasn't either I learned it when I was writing pages from the dictionary for being a smartass in third grade our history teacher started talking about Benjamin Franklin basically the usual stuff that everyone knows but then she says how great of a president he was while I'm in third grade and I know that's not right I raised my hand and I tell her that Benjamin Franklin was never a president the class disagrees with me and so does the teacher but I hold my ground and she looks in her book off presidents and sure enough I'm right most satisfying moment of my life the teacher was actually willing to admit she was wrong that at least makes her infinitely superior to most of the teachers in these stories the kids in my son's class had to pick a state to do a report on one of the kids picked Hawaii the teacher told him he had to pick another one because Hawaii isn't a state a substitute tried to tell us that 9/11 was the first time America was attacked on our own soil good lord stuff like this should be our go-to answer when people question why we should bother to learn history when my brother was in grade four both of his teachers insisted that Mexico was in South America and laughed at him for saying otherwise when he brought in articles about NAFTA that my mom printed out for him to prove them wrong they said anyone can say anything on the Internet I had a teacher in a second-grade tell our class that Texas is the largest state I proceeded to attempt to correct her by pointing out that Alaska quite a bit larger than Texas her only response was Alaska doesn't count because it's made of ice when I was in elementary school a pay coach insisted that the oxygenated blood was blue I tried to tell him otherwise blood is dark red when it's drawn from a syringe e.t.c but he didn't listen I ended up asking my doctor who burst out laughing and said something to the lines of him that is why he is the pay coach not your doctor not my child but my father was once told by a high school teacher that the Japanese kamikaze pilots all performed seppuku on themselves right before their planes hit ships in Pearl Harbor this is 10x more epic than the truth I was born in France I moved here when I was 8 you and spoke no English only knew yes no and thank you I went to a bilingual school for third fourth and fifth grade you learn pretty quickly at that age my fifth grade teacher was Latin don't remember what country she was from the Deaf Spanish as a first language heavy accent we were doing grammar one day and she asked me what part of a speech a certain word was I said it's a verb her response no it's a birth I argued with her that for two years I'd been taught that it's verb not birth she insisted that it was birth and made me say birth the rest of the year the next year I started middle school at a regular school same convo w new teacher and I say it's a birth of course everyone including the teacher laughed at me I was like I knew it Ali a teacher my coworker was told by her son's kindergarten teacher that if she fed him fruit while he had a flu he'd develop an allergy to the fruit I nearly peed myself laughing my teacher insisted there were 100 meters in a kilometer huge argument ensued I won with my facts well there are also 900 more pedantry aside that's got to be infuriating my Homeric teacher tried to convince us that honey was very bad and to always eat white processed sugar also fresh cows milk and fresh eggs are poisonous until processed after growing up on a ranch in the middle of nowhere and eating all three no not all my life she called me a liar and said I should have been dead a long time ago I am dead and I have come for you to profess all your lies I don't have children but I was told in sex ed that condoms do not protect against any STDs I was always confused as to why gay men wore condoms I thought it was some sort of fetish my sister's third grade teacher thought that a baker's dozen was 11 since the Baker ate one as a baker I can confirm this had a teacher tell me that a gallon was 64 ounces I told her it was twice that a security guard came to the door to drop off mail something she asked him he said 128 Oz in the teacher rang from the room sobbing right past the very confused guard a same woman told me that Japan is a communist nation Japan is an animation nation in 2004 back when I was in the sixth grade we had a geography quiz one of the questions was who Hong Kong belonged to United Kingdom and China were both answer choices I answered China and got it wrong so I asked my teacher about it she told me that although Hong Kong was technically now part of China the textbook which was printed in 1996 said it was still part of the UK therefore she wouldn't correct my quiz why the Frick would you put a question like that in a quiz knowing the situation my sixth grade teacher asked the class for an example of an interesting animal I said piranha she said no fish aren't animals that's when I realized she was a complete idiot my science teacher told me that we'd all die in 50 years when the coal supply ran out cue me having a mad panic and bullying my eyes out until my dad told me otherwise growing up in the 1890s must have been stressful my year 9 UK school year I was 14 euro geography teacher insisted that Havana was in Mexico I had been to Cuba not one year before yet she insisted she was right she called me to find Ravana on the map and find it I did chilling there on Cuba's western tip on the massive map of the world on the wall next to her desk okay sit down now was her response I lost quite a bit of respect for teachers that day and it was from that point I truly began questioning what people presented to me as fact if she was wrong about that I thought what other Bulls has she been passing off as fact she accidentally gave you the beginnings of wisdom my cousin's teacher asked the class of very young children to name colors of apples she a screamed the teacher said I mean ripe apples she said yay green my mom buys green apples and the teacher made her look like an idiot in class she got home and told her mom about it and my aunt promptly purchased a granny smith apple for each student in the class came with her to school the next day my sister's teacher in grade seven insisted that it was the leaning tower of pizza even after several of the kids told Harry was Pisa high school science teacher said Katrina was a twister I raised my hand and said it was a hurricane instead of admitting she made a mistake she continued to defend her original statement I continued to explain to the class what the differences were in that in fact Katrina was a hurricane with a major fact being it was named we don't go around naming tornadoes do we the teacher cried I was an ass when I was younger I guess ok this one really P me off in my freshman year of high school we were studying US history for about the seventh time and we were talking about the desegregation of Little Rock high school er we had to do some kind of group work in which we had to write down facts of some sort about the incident I talked about how President Eisenhower had to send a bit over a thousand u.s. army troops from the 101 st. airborne to protect the incoming African American students the student teacher basically just the teachers bee was walking by and just laughed at my comment he hated me I looked at him with a strong sense of confusion thinking that maybe I got my numbers wrong and he said you really think that the 101st airborne would go to Little Rock high school to protect it what do you think they did flew all their fighters to the high school to protect it had overhead the tax on the protesters come on Snoop Oscar be rational here I tried describing to the student teacher that the 101 st. airborne isn't the Air Force and that the troops were definitely from that section of the military but once again he laughed at me thankfully we had computers in class so I looked it up showed him the information and still thought I was wrong he still made fun of me for thinking that you know what I'm going to send him an email now that I'm gone from that school there are sharks in the Dead Sea somewhat on topic back when I was in second grade my parents had just gotten me this awesome messenger bag that had a big sailboat on it I was super excited and showed my teacher we needed to have our names somewhere on our backpacks and supplies usually written on the tags inside but this bag didn't have any tags so instead my teacher proceeded to write my name with a permanent marker all over the front of my bag and she then wrote a letter to my parents saying my school bag was too small and I needed a larger one I was extremely sad and my parents piaf had a substitute teacher that told the class that aids would be airborne in the next three years he got mad at me when I said really because no it isn't I dig that response health and career class tried to say that drugs weren't bad they related it to coffee then said it was okay to try at parties when I was in the seventh grade my teacher failed me on a report that stated Christopher Columbus did not discover the Americas he landed in the West Indies and the Caribbean islands he also was not the first European explorers who eventually visit the Americas at least one previous Explorer Leif Ericson preceded him the teacher stated that I was blatantly making things up to hype my sense of self-importance I don't believe I had ever been so angry in my life I had a multiple-choice test question in fifth grade that asked if tall buildings were measured in a millimeters B centimeters C meters D kilometers I picked meters which she claimed was incorrect and that the correct answer was kilometers that led to an argument with my math teacher which in turn led to a parent-teacher conference where my parents apparently had a hard time stifling their laughter but I would have just argued that they were all correct because it's a unit of length and therefore suitable for measuring Heights son's 3rd grade assignments draw your dream house he got an F because his dream house wasn't realistic he failed another student choice off-topic assignment he did on dinosaurs because dinosaurs weren't real as they weren't in the Bible he got detention when he told her neither air conditioners public school early nineties in rural Texas my son was in kindergarten and had an assessment test to determine if he was prepared to continue I came enough towards for the review the teachers commented that he did very well but he missed a question what's your favorite number apparently he answered infinity and explained clearly why yah they were looking for a simpler answer like 5 when I told them that in mathematics it's considered a number they said it was too high a concept for a child to understand and therefore wrong how do you get an opinion question wrong this happened to me rather than my kids we had a substitute - now kindergarten class who went on a rant about how the Holocaust wasn't real and never happened my best friend was also in my class and she lost her grandparents in the Holocaust we went home and told our mothers who showed up together the next morning and by the end of that day that woman wasn't allowed to substitute in that district anymore my junior high science teacher along with my entire class were convinced that while skydiving when you pulled the chute you actually go up like the parachute somehow creates lift almost like a bungee cord I tried to tell them that it just appears that way because the person filming doesn't pull their chute at the same time and therefore keeps falling at terminal while the parachute as velocity is significantly reduced totally felt like I was on crazy pills the whole class was yelling at me we had to take it to a high school physics teacher resolved the argument when I was 9 years old my parents divorced and my new elementary school had a ridiculous in-house therapist his methods included coloring a blank chalk outline photo in different colors to show where I felt my emotions even as a child I was irritated also he suggested I kick the wall if I'm ever angry because the wall doesn't feel pain I did so and smashed a 13 X 10 inches hole through the drywall in my bedroom you should have kicked a hole in his office wall then walked out saying thanks I feel so much better now what is the sickest burn you have seen a teacher give to a student talking about percentage of skin on the body if you get burned in health class it was something like 18% on the back and chest 18% for both arms and 18% for both legs then 1% for genitals and 10% for your head and neck a kid who we will call Baba shouts out don't you mean 5% for genitals he chirped wheel for you point 5% Bubba pretty shocked just goes excuse me the teacher just yelled really loud your penis Bubba I teased tiny that is what I said dang that's like a 100 percent of skin level burn student constantly skips class teacher where's Justin student I can call him if you want teacher do it cause Justin teacher hey Justin where are you when you should be in my class Justin you can tell he's a little freaked out up mcDonald's teacher pick up an application click I hope he doesn't burn the fries too what sex ed said sarcastically by a fifteen-year-old in my class science teacher oh-h-h it's fine you won't need it for another twenty thirty years the class was laughing the rest of the lesson student can we postpone the math test it's on my birthday teacher well unlike your birthday this math test was planned ahead of time she is my high school math teacher had three adopted children he was also the econ teacher bad move bento well and one day he was talking about loan repayment etc he used the example of the loans that he'd gotten to pay the adoption costs for his kids and quoted some ridiculously high number I am also adopted and the number he gave was way higher than what my parents told me it costed to adopt my brother and me I raised my hand and said this and he goes well yeah you were probably on sale I laughed so hard I cried he must have thought I was offended because he felt really bad about it and apologized later he was actually crying when he apologized but I told him it was probably the funniest thing anyone had ever said about me being adopted why did I get an F on this assignment well that was the lowest grade I could give you in history class we are in the middle of an understandably somber section about the Holocaust and concentration camp conditions and one student decides it would be the perfect time to fire off a Jewish joke the teacher just turned around slowly and said that's impressive student what's impressive mr. s well here I am talking about men Joe and Hitler not to mention all of the other Nazis and yet you somehow still managed to be the least likable person in today's class literally worse than Hitler we were taking a quick 20 question multiple-choice quiz a few years back in a bio class and the teacher suspected one of the stoner kids in the back had been cheating because he kept messing with his shorts I hope you aren't sliding that pant leg up to check the answers you have written down the student piped back yet of course I have them all written on my dong and without missing a beat a teacher fired back all right well where did you write the other 18 answers the P teacher walked into the boys locker room when my friend was giving another one gum and asked what drugs are handing their friend their steroids you want some you look like you need them teacher no thanks they don't seem to be working student trying to be intimidating don't get me angry you won't like me when I'm angry teacher nobody likes you anyway context student has turned in a lousy paper student come on I bet you did papers the night before when you were in college prof yeah but I'm smarter than you I've said basically the same thing to my students you can write a paper the night before if you've done all the research and other work basically if you've become smart enough my teacher was a bit sarcastic and would often joke with us both of these were about me but I love them 1 what is the difference between gorram reavers and a calendar a calendar has a future to me reading a Snapple cap Hut the average human dream lasts 30 seconds teacher o gorram reavers you make it too easy me what do you mean teacher if the average human dream only lasts 30 seconds why are you still thinking of going to college Jesus that second one I Wow on my end of year report card that I had to take home to my parents one of my teachers wrote I shall miss goodly lawful cheerful presence in my class as well as his ever more creative excuses for the non-production of work I came back the next year after I got an A on the National exam for his class and caught him telling a group of prospective students if goodly lawful kinase this course anyone can vouch that second one is cruel teacher goes to turn the AC down kid in my class thank you you read my mind teacher it was a short book James get away from that window everyone will think this is a special school freshman health in college professor is talking about cardio exercise and wants examples of them some kids blurts out sex to which the professor's replies I don't think I'd consider two minutes of sex a cardiovascular workout no more smartass remarks from that guy 9th grade biology we are learning about how when a sperm meets an egg it creates a cell called a zygote this girl raises her hand to ask so do I have a zygote in me right now he responds I don't know what goes on in your personal life Kelly I had a teacher that would write out next to all my wrong answers on a test you seemed to be a bit of an intellectual snob your academic performance makes me wonder why whole class gasped to shreds you say student I forget why I'm going to be one of the people running the world by then I'm the future teacher that's like reminding me that I'm going to die only more depressing double-quote with no regard for human life a friend and I were visiting my English teacher after class and my friend was showing her a picture of her shoes and making sure they were appropriate for graduation teacher those are fine I just meant don't wear any eight shoes me aaww I bought the cutest hate shoes and now I can't wear them s teacher no you'll have to save that for your job set my dumb ass up on that one in sixth grade latin our teacher called a mischievous student a wart on the ass off progress I've always loved that so we are in pay and our teacher is new to the school but taught in juvie for a while and had several tattoos so she played around with us but in the end took no crap we are sitting in the bleachers one day and she leans back and under the hair she always kept it in a bun or something one of the students among the more rowdy of us she tolerated him barely then shouts down at her hammy's name here you look better with your hair down she stops looks at him and gums yeah well you look better with my eyes closed the bleachers erupted kid was sticking an eraser in a Bunsen burner with a pair of tongs science teacher told him to stop because the fumes can give you brain cancer then she added on second thoughts it's probably too late for you to worry about that student's name you're my second favorite student of all time everyone else is tied for first in a sea of rude and offensive comments and this topic this one was actually very clever and funny Jonathan you were one of the babies the Spartans would have thrown down the mountain so I had a friend in HS who wore khaki pants and a collared shirt to school pretty much every day one day he was leaning over some kids desk helping him with something and his ass sticking way out just tempting someone to run over and smack it and another friend James does just that he runs over and lands a perfect incredibly loud slaps square on the book cheeks on him that made him bold to standing up immediately fortunately for every else in the class except for James it wasn't my friend but the teacher who also wore khakis and college shirts to school every day everyone goes silent and the teacher turns around bright red there with a big smile on his face and says James save that for after class everyone bursts out laughing and the kid of course never lived it down that was the dress code at my high school I had math last period so we usually had the last few minutes to pack up and chew out one girl who would always be on her phone in class calls - what a food before she goes to work the teacher took notice and when she had to give her phone number to the place he wrote it down about a week later when she was texting while he was lecturing he just stops goes to his desk and calls her to tell her to get off her phone or the look of confusion on her face was priceless I went to a college where we wore military like khaki uniforms for Halloween one year our buddy and I switched uniforms he was a Marine that worked very hard at keeping his uniform absolutely perfect and I was a slacker that wore more backi versions of the required car key as we went to class one teacher realized the switch looked right at my buddy in my uniform and said you freaked up already you showed up on time good times after a particularly bad group project presentation that basically just failed to touch on anything relevant to the core subject his review as I asked you for a painting you gave me a frame that's a great metaphor kid walked into history class and said sir what movie are we watching today teacher turned around and said blankly I don't know as your mom made a new one whole class was in tears for about five minutes our a math teacher placed a book on the marker tray of the whiteboard with an arrow on the board connecting the book to the sentence markers biography the book was called the ugliest boy Marco was a student and was also the teacher's son this smartass HS senior in my freshman algebra class v mr. capital s hey mr. s you've been teaching forever getting pretty old aren't you ha ha ha when you gonna give it up a mr. s straight-faced like a boss Oh idk Adam I figure about the time you pass this class the guy's face was as red as a Santa suit greatest first day of school ever student calls male teacher gay insinuating the teacher wants him I'm not gay but if I was I could do a lot better than you he had no come back I was up roaming the classroom fooling around when I should have been at my seat bio teacher yelled at me and said sit down you are tilting the room I am not an extremely big guy but big enough for that remark to make sense I like to imagine that this teacher had actually eating quite a large quantity of shrooms and believed what he said he'll heartedly high school art teacher once asked for a show of hands of who was taking on the course next year with him a troublemaker put his hand up and the teacher just said number you behave as well as you look the class lost their crap after that one this was in junior high which I think was eighth grade we had a math teacher who was a bit rotund and rosy-cheeked and upon reflection a bit effeminate as we all know girls of that age can get a bit tightly wound and dramatic so every time there was a confrontation like that in class he would sing the teapot song as then with dance move and everything for those who do not know I'm a little teapot short and stout this is my handle this is my spout when I get all steamed up hear me shout tip me over and pour me out probably the most effective 14 year old girl diffuser I have ever seen that was adorable I was a teacher for a few years some time ago during my first year of teaching was when M&M was getting really popular I had this one student who was very into M&M to the point of replicating haricot hair color style of dress etc this student was also frequently disruptive one morning as I was trying to start class he was standing next to his desk chatting with another student and totally oblivious to the fact that class was starting so I look right at him get his attention and say are you the real Slim Shady up number then sit down small victories student can I go to the bathroom teacher I don't know can you student well you can always help me out teacher this isn't a science class I don't have any tweezers double-quote to the burn ward with you strong counter for a week one nice writing a quiz teacher okay kids name finish up kid I'm thinking teacher I thought I smelled burning teacher me and my wife got a new dog and we're trying to think of a name student why not name it by a toll teacher that's a good one but every time it call my dog you'd come running my dad was a high school teacher about 30 or 40 years ago he was pretty young so his students felt pretty comfortable around him and felt comfortable messing with him there was this one student who decided to put a tack on my dad's chair before he came in one morning my dad noticed it before he sat down and decided to keep standing a few minutes into class the kid got called to the office my dad took the tack and put it on the kid's chair when the kid returned the other students were able to hide their snickering pretty well he sits down and immediately jumps about 6 feet in the air the class bursted out laughing my dad always wins this was about 2006 student the song American Idiot was written about you teacher boulevard of broken dreams was written about your future this is the one that made me laugh sounds like one of my old teachers I once rushed through an AP English essay at the last minute it was returned to me with a litany of red ink and a question at the end why waste this paper happy ending I got a five stroke five on the actual AP exam serious teachers of Reddit did a student ever offer you sex to pass a class if yes how did you react and what's where the further consequences serious replies only I am a thirty year old male who teaches college chemistry there was this one student who almost never turned up to classes cheated on homework assignments and I caught her cheating on a test one at the end of the year just before all the final grades were due she comes up to me after class and says and I quote I'll do anything to pass this class anything you desire at all I was really confused but then I realized what she meant I politely told her there was nothing I could do to change her grade afterwards I reported her to the head of department and she was given a warning turns out this was not the first time she has done this last I heard she was kicked out for harassment a former teacher of mine told us this story at a volunteer retreat late thirties early forties average looking high school English teacher had a student who wasn't doing great in his class but would always come in after school to help him rearrange the desks in his room and clean the chalkboard he claimed that objectively she was very attractive one afternoon she makes an advance leans over his desk showing her glorious cleavage and say seductively you know mr. teacher I'm really into older men he chuckled and replied me too I was a gradual teaching assistant a few years back at an expensive private university in a major American city while it had a decent enough reputation it is one of the most expensive schools in the country we used to joke around that it was the safety school for rich kids who couldn't get into the Ivy League's at the graduate level things are a little different and in any case they were paying Emmy to attend so I was happy enough with it I had this professor for whom I was teaching labs and assisting with grades he was a relatively young guy decent looking late 30s maybe early 40s the course he taught was a really annoying boring course that nevertheless was mandatory for social science majors one day acute student who was ironically enough not even failing the class came to his office hours and started flirting heavily with him this particular professor was super paranoid about that sort of thing and so was very careful not to let things escalate but he was also a hard-ass who enjoyed busting cheaters and great grubbers so he decided to let it play out this happened two or three more times with him playing done as to what's going on before the student finally drops all pretend and flat-out asks him what it's going to take for her to get an A in the course looks at her and tells our that he is going to need her to write him a check for $10,000 and that he was going to kneel it made out to him with course 101 help with professor name in the subject line according to him she actually reached for her checkbook before stopping and saying that she would actually have to have her dad write the check for her that she left his office and never bothered him again whether it was because she realized that a dad wasn't going to help her or because she suspected quite correctly that his very next stop was going to be the Office of Student Conduct with her check in hand we never found out but he got to see in the class and he never heard from her again my husband was a grader for several 400 level math classes during his last two years in college after one particularly difficult exam he found one of the papers of a female student he'd graded in his mailbox with a note asking him if he would need drinks and other things at a local bar so she could explain to him why he should review his grading and see if he might have gotten some of it wrong instead he reviewed her tests found two additional problems he lets slide the first time that he now marked wrong and returned the test to her with the lower grade and a note thanking her for asking him to review her tests we were newlyweds at the time and it wasn't until he told me about the exchange later that week that he realized what she meant he literally thought she just wanted him to review her test that is so charmingly oblivious well I wasn't technically offered anything but I'll share anyway I was 22 when I received my first teaching job towards the end of the year a female student was failing my class in an effort to be a good teacher I called her father mother wasn't in the picture to tell him about his daughter's poor grades being young and naive I used my cell phone to call him the conversation went very well and I thought nothing of it for the rest of the day the next day I had several students come into class early and tell me that this particular girl was spreading rumors about her and me she apparently found out about my conversation with her father took my cell phone number out of his phone and was showing it off to people telling them that we had been seeing each other needless to say I was scare shitless fortunately for me my students had my back and called her out on it and told her they would throw her under the bus if she accused me of anything she stopped I still should have reported it but didn't thankfully that was the last of that situation and I stayed far away from her for the rest of the year also she failed my class I didn't have a kid specifically asked me to pass him but after getting bad grades on almost all projects he started hitting on me frequently to clarify this was high school and I was student teaching but I graded all their projects the instance that was funniest to me was when he said your dress looks good with him looking me up and down though gross I just said thanks to defuse a situation hopefully and then he just blurts out Me's Kyla I'm 18 his friends all laughed look shocks so I just said what's your point he responded with just wanted you to know I said that's nice then just so you know my boyfriend is 25 after that he didn't do much else a teacher I shadowed once as an assistant told me a student came up to him and did the whole I'll do anything to pass this class so routine told me he looked around the room check the halls shut the door looked her in the eyes and said you can start by studying more next year while I was interning at a private school I had a senior girl asked me if I had ever been deep throated I stood there for several seconds running through the safest range of reactions I could provide while maintaining classroom authority and asked her why she was suddenly interested in the Nixon administration the chorus of giggles from her friends died out as I continued on and gave brief summary of the Watergate scandal when I mentioned this to my mentor teacher she just grunted and called the girl yes lesson learned was that sometimes acting oblivious is the best response rather bizarre story an acquaintance of mine as a middle school teacher in a private NYC school a very very attractive 35 old woman married mother of two kids she regularly as in four years now gets offers from her students father's to either help her out go discuss his son daughter's grade over dinner join for a week upstate et Cie she says they all know she is married but feel entitled to proposition since they are mostly very well-off men and see her teaching career is somewhat unfortunate circumstance they can help her out with at some point she took some time off to avoid a particularly aggressive father the school apparently can't do anything except accommodate her request not to be alone in PTA type meetings et Cie so not really students but their fathers I was attained an undergrad anthropology class about 15 years ago and a pair of girls had been failing to turn in their lab work on time and were in danger of failing the class they had asked the professor for leniency and she told them they needed to ask me since I was the one who would have to grade a semesters worth of work for two people around the holidays they approached me in office hours and were making hard overtures yes as a pair they did the whole hair twirling isn't there anything we can do remarkably well scripted I must say I had a girlfriend at the time so I declined being a nice guy monogamous boyfriend I offered to grade their work if they turned it in before some arbitrary date like a week before the final or something now I was an undergraduate myself and therefore we had a gradual tear who oversaw all the yuto's he was in his mid-twenties and had a Richard Gere in first-night thing going on he was a good-looking guy no homo the following week in class he had this smirk on his face the entire time after class he saddled up to me threw his arm around my shoulder and said something like bro never say no to a good thing yeah he hit that the girls turned in their work a week or so later and lo and behold their assignments were effectively copies of one another's with a few paragraphs rearranged in some minor wording tweaks I gave them XS on all of the work failure due to academic dishonesty the professor decided not to xsm for the class because her words the paperwork is a big pain in the arse grad se gave em the D professor gave em the D and I gave n nothing zero stroke ten would not do a game physics teacher here I'm pretty young decently attractive and in pretty good shape I've never had students offer to sleep with me to change a grade or passed the class but I've had female students make moves on me because they were attracted to me the first time it happened the female student told me quite bluntly that she wanted to freak me I responded telling her that it wasn't appropriate to talk to me or anyone else like that I went and told my bosses just so my ass was covered and I refused to be in a room alone with any student now I had another student pursue a relationship with me despite knowing I had a girlfriend at the time my gf was frequently around the school she attempted to get my number added me on Facebook which I declined told one of my athletes to give me a number and made several other approaches I reported every single one of them and they finally told her that I was going to police if she did it again I am a professor at reasonably well-known University I have had two occasions where the student offered something for a better grade I've probably been flirted with countless times but I am pretty oblivious to women flirting with me the first time I had a student who was struggling mightily in the class she probably could have or would have passed if she simply had the discipline to come to class and to do her homework instead she would show up regularly for office hours and ask for help she would always wear tops at revealed cleavage she was well endowed and exceptionally good-looking she never offered anything with her words but it was clear that she was offering I always made sure that my office door was 100% open when she was visiting I also made sure that I made very good eye contact with her at all times that is I never looked at her cleavage after I've figured out what she was doing the student failed in retook the class with a different professor the next semester the second time the student learned that her grade was less than she wanted I think that she got a C+ and she offered to clean my office or do anything else that I wanted for a better grade I simply told her that her great was final and there was nothing that she could do again I'm pretty oblivious so I didn't think much of it my then girlfriend now wife pointed out that she was actually offering to sleep with me for a better grade and for the record I don't ever find my students attractive even if I can recognize that some of them were actually very attractive for me it's kind of like looking at your sister or your daughter and thinking oh yeah I'd like to tap that I'm just not interested I teach college have for the past twelve years I've never had a student offer to sleep with me to pass a class but when I was in college I had a professor strongly hint that I could sleep with her to get a better grade she didn't come out and say but her exact words were well if you really want to help your grade you could always before smiling and jokingly playing it off I now I only teach online so I don't expect that to ever happen unless I go back into the classroom I'm 24 and I work at a polytechnic university i teach classes full of men some of them with not even a single girl and we have a daily class although i haven't been offered intercourse to pass next week our finals though the jokes cat calling and insinuations are part of my day now some of them have tried to get my number where I live and I've been asked out a few times a lot of my students are around my age and some of them older they don't seem to see me as their teacher at all you should institute the professionalism great and take points off for inappropriate behavior I was never directly propositioned for grades but it's possible that it was part of their endgame my first year as professor on track for tenure during my office hours I was asked separately by two different sorority girls to attend their mixer that night with my career in mind wide eyed ethics in tow bid against all urges I politely declined alternating fantasies of each of them polluted my mind that night at home for the last few weeks of the semester I can't help but notice a few of these ladies always near the front row braless with tight sorority t-shirts or tanks on fast-forward five years later and I had changed career paths and end up working with another girl from that sorority who was never my student and she explained that I was - as Professor McSteamy in their sorority house and what started as playful joking crushes turned into some sort of weird competition where the goal was to get me in bed at the time I made the right decision in hindsight man I flicked up not really but dang it strangely enough I had somewhat the opposite happened I was 21 at a time in a batch at a psychology male this will become relevant at some point psychology is known for being a study where there are more females than males I was a bit older than my fellow students because I had tried different studies and changed in my second year we had a few hours with no classes and went out for a drink in the local bar a group from the third year was there and people were chatting one of the people of that group was a teacher now probably about 28 30 years old really interesting guy had a down-to-earth view on the world and we had discussions going about just about everything as students tend to do during the discussions we learned that he is openly gay good for him I'm not however and currently seeing someone good for him eventually the group starts growing smaller he starts prying into people their social lives hitting on people and people head home the week after that he suddenly added me on MSN really dating myself here conversations happen over the course of a few weeks we continued the bar discussions we had and eventually he declares that he has fallen head over heels in love with me I respectfully decline and tell him I'm still happily hetero we somewhat cease contact and I go on with my life the year after that my final year I had him as a teacher for one of the courses 60 students in that class three males I never went to any of his courses I did study for his course after the exam he did tell me he found it sad that he never got to see me in the morning in class I got through the course with a 10 out of 20 I never spoke to him again I still have him on Lincoln and I think I was at and was friendly SH with a girl in my class she found out about a party I was having and came over got drunk and asked if she could sleep over since she was drinking I said sure but was worried she might be mad if I made a move I was not very smart she still asked me to give her an a on her final I told her no funny enough she got an a anyway the vice-principal of our high school was accused of misconduct by two female students the police were brought in to investigate everyone in the school knew it was a complete lie this guy could be a bit of a hard-ass at times but that's just the nature of the VP job he was a real upstanding by-the-book guy who put in a lot of hours coaching sports unfortunately it all made the front page of the local paper it took a few weeks but the girls finally admitted they made the whole thing up in the meantime they put that man and his family through sheer heck of course the paper buried the story of his exoneration deep in the back pages it was just so sad and frustrating to see how all this played out so publicly I was a fifth grade 12 year old student science was always my thing and because I was an astute student and kind of a teacher's pet my teacher would let me do things like file papers gray papers organized bookshelves and hang out in her class after hours while I was in the aftercare program some were the counselors and after school found this was a little odd but I didn't see anything wrong with it after a while me and mrs. R became closer where we would talk about family friends and what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say things like I want to be a doctor and I want a family and kids of my own well one day in particular she told me that being married wasn't all it was cracked up to be and showed me her wedding ring she took it off and asked if I would massage her hands still being a little naive I complied a few days go by and she asked if I wanted to go to Six Flags as a gift for being such a helpful student I told her I probably wasn't allowed and she got visibly mad at me and told me she would get closer to my best friend than she was with me and that I shouldn't be surprised when my grades dropped seriously a few weeks go by and she writes me a letter telling me about her dream she had where I performed oral on her and that she thinks about me during reddit intercourse with her husband I was shocked and so embarrassed that I couldn't even think about telling my grandmother lived with grandmother long story short my grandmother found the letter in my back pocket while doing laundry one day a few days later mrs. Oz mother became very ill and mrs. R took a leave of absence I had to speak to investigators from the state in great detail about my relationship with mrs. Parr and my grandmother had to sign documents that she wouldn't sue or make it public the events that happened last I heard mrs. I'll has a new husband a child named the same name as my childhood best friend a very unique name and works at a bank maybe this is why I am gay you have been visited by the science dojo upvote now and you will get high grades and good results within the next week if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check out another video or don't either way have a great day you magnificent people [Music]

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 195,551

Rating: 4.7971992 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, chill, story, stories, reddit on tap, teachers share, teacher, student, students react, school stories, high school, detention, middle school, parents, funny reddit

Id: AOOfyCLvPt8

Length: 62min 4sec (3724 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 25 2019