Talking Funny - HBO

great I mean the same time I don't know which ones worse yeah I'm you yeah so you've been in LA you think that's a shirt watch mean I've been in LA I've been to LA no you've been spending time there and that's why you're leaner and you're wearing black and you're grooming no I wore black when I was fat and so all my stuff is black now I'm not so fat so it's it sort of hugged me I can do anything I can be any size in these clothes because they're all stretch hmm I want I'm just curious like so you get an idea and I know there's no real answer to this but you get an idea how long on average do you feel till it's done till you go that's I got that to where I wanted it how long would you say like the first month you know it's not gonna be as good as after six months knowing it there's a weird almost fruit like cycle to it because gets ripe and then it starts rotting a little bit for me sometimes all right the people that write about comedy and I know it's not their business the critics but they should understand what an act is when I go to see somebody work I don't want to see your new hour I do I want to see the act see this is this is the this is the eternal argument between em and I having this discussion literally welcome I have the same feeling because I do I throw away my act every year I do it yes all right I throw it away I know but I mean you know every year I get rid of I don't know ten or twenty percent my head and so I so it's every five years of four years I don't really keep track of it right but I do feel like there are those core thing but you don't work like that you like to create a show and that's the show I like those 200 shows you do what do you think 206 okay so by the end of that that's an act that's an act and that's ready for HBO right if they want it and by but you must be coming up with stuff all the time and yeah and you so you gradually involve the act you do new stuff yeah so we like to keep evolving it like Jack Welch Ren GE every year he fired the bottom 10% right that's the way what's your oldest to hold as your oldest stuff like is this like sourdough bread that there's over 10 years 10 years yeah I've been doing sucks in grade 10 years I mean I'm like I grew up Woody Allen Prince I like short geniuses every year Woody Allen has a new movie every year Prince has a new album right and that's the way I look at it like but Jerry's point is that when you go and see Prince you want to see his greatest hits not his new album but I think if you leave maybe today I want to see that hits but there was a moment there from there was a 20-year period in Prince's career where I just wanted to do shit I couldn't wait for those because people if people come and see you cuz there's you know I have an ongoing relationship with my audience I think and a lot of people come back to see me if something sees you on TV doing a special and they see this stuff they love and then they come see you live and they see it live they'll actually be happy right but they won't come back again don't go that I know what that guy does if they come and see you live after the special and it's completely different Kristen I've had are they coming to see you or they coming to see the app they're coming to see you they're not coming to to discuss the evolution of you know the comedy they're coming to see Jerry Seinfeld are they they want a date is an event if they see the exact same thing then they won't come back people will not come in here but also the the challenge of that of like there's a huge amount of pressure people are coming they paid a lot of money they had to park and they got in a fight with their date or whatever it is so there is a lot of you know there's a huge challenge in not having your old act but I think you rise to the occasion and you don't rise to the occasion if you don't put a put the void there but if you take away your old material from yourself like one thing I started doing when I was developing ours is I take my closing bit and I open with it right just to fuck myself right it's nothing I have to follow my strongest bit that's how he got good you see this attitude yeah well because then the end of your act cauterizes it gets longer just because you have because you don't have a choice why I started doing that you get take get rid of all your best weapons and you have to you know where else your your dad don't you think something out when we discussing things like oh what what the audience expect or what do they want don't this summer in me that says I don't care it's not up to them it's not like them I'll do exactly what I want and that you know then you can't if you if you didn't like it I I don't care don't come and see me again don't ever come and see me don't want to be judged I really don't want to be judged well then you're in the wrong business well you are you're going up there to beat no one is more judged in civilized society than a stand-up comedian every 12 seconds you raided yeah but that's yeah that's the feedback that's what it gives you that they laugh well they don't what I mean is I'm not entering a competition this is not I'm not entering a popularity contest you are in a competition no I know because there's no right attitude as long as it works you know it seems to me in other words he doesn't care and that's funny to people and that's making them laugh and you should write for yourself blah blah blah yeah but when you play Radio City Music Hall or Madison Square Garden or whatever you're competing with Led Zeppelin that was there tonight before or Prince sir something you're competing with to get sell those tickets whatever you have to get to a level to sell a certain number of tickets every room you're in you're competing with the people that played that room and you have to be at least as good as the other people that plays well I mean I don't I don't charge anything that I wouldn't want to do or has ever done to find an audience I do what I do and somewhere in the world there's enough people that want to come and feel that venue absolutely that's exactly right it's like Darwinist really because you have your thing that you do and then people flock to it and if you don't if they don't they don't know exactly remember the first time you met another kid that was funny yeah that was big so it's a big deal I was in third grade and I met a kid that was funny and was a name do you remember Jimmy teni and we started making each other laugh mm-hmm I mean I remember kids that were like really funny funnier than you wait yeah and then you go off and you make this whole career out of it they're going guys that beat Jordan bass and basketball I was always trying to be was funny I always like you said I only hung out with the funny kid yeah but my family were funny all her friends but that was the important thing yeah I grew up once you've paid your way the point was to have a laugh and that was usually you know you know ribbing people but it was a kid named Colin Ryan I went to junior high school with and my first Asian or high school your it's a very scary step from the elementary school you know from being like eating a lunch with a milk in the class and then you're taking a shower with a bunch of kids like first day of junior high school and I'm in the shower and I'm terrified and I don't know anybody and then this kid next to me pointed like he just points and shows me that he's peeing on the kid next to him hanging all over him and I just died laughing he made me laugh that way a million times and then I went to my high school reunion and he was just kind of depressed looking guy and I told him that story and I could see that the glimmer was a little faded but then he said you know somewhere that kid is walking around he still doesn't know I peed on it but I don't know what he does reliving but some people still funny it's not funny now I love jokes so much I know I I love them so much that if I if I love like that's why I do your act I love that joke I never you know the Walker you wanted to do the joke which one the word about the vacation you're making me do my act in front of those this is Jerry Seinfeld doing okay so I'm going on my vacation wife my family pack up the car and the kids and I'm clicking in the car seats and I put the wife in and I get everything set and it's such it's so much work to get a family in a car I close the door for my wife on the passenger side I walk around to the driver's side that's my vacation something that's total it's a completely Seinfeld 'add version really I mean you really polished it up you demitted really you made it nice okay so now just to finish the point I love that joke it's a it's a but you made it like a joke you made it like a joke I heard it was his his is like his life's falling apart once ready oh you heard him do it yeah yeah yeah see you do it now no the thing is no because I when I do it I'm sputtering through it yeah and sweaty anger and energy but you turn it into a really nice beautiful you could see that you could see the moves you don't know you don't even know the jokes come in when Louie did I didn't think that's a joke I just thought this is a man falling apart for my pleasure like my Sam and this is a man this is a man spilling his heart out telling me what a bad days had and it's hilarious it's really way to do what he wants no I know but I do that as well I sort of disguise jokes I don't I don't know no I don't think I make jokes I think of a joke a little amount of words at the same time I think you try to I try to make it seem like I'm just getting this out but I know all the moves I know every little piece of it still needs a joke under that I mean that's the problem they think it's all attitude no weird persona under under your crazy voice yes Henny Youngman has to have something to do with it yeah yeah you can put all kind of furniture but you gotta have steel in the walls yeah when I was like 19 or 20 I got to open for Jerry at the Paradise in Boston this is before you had your show it's the first time I opened for you big Club it was like it was a rock club that they did comedy with bigger acts right and I got to open for you and you got mad at me cuz I said I introduced you and said he's the best comedian in the world and you did your set and it must have never left your brain because the second you got offstage you found me and said don't fucking put pressure on a person like that you don't say that when you bring somebody on stage it's a stupid thing it must have been the whole actor taking that fucking kid I know but Tom Papa did the same thing to me about three months ago yeah and I went right in the toy that had a benefit you know it's not it was dumb the audience just went oh really I know / I was 19 years old but anyway so you couldn't remain but anyway but then he invited me to a bunch of shows with him so we did up some big theatres and I had never done big theaters and people applauded jokes in big theaters and they did then they don't applause breaks for such an eighties thing and so I would I'm opening for Jerry in front of like twelve hundred or twenty twenty-five hundred people and people are applauding bits and I had never encountered that I didn't know how to handle it just standing there waiting for people to sound lauding yeah and I do I bow where do I say thank you so I asked Jerry what to do and he said you stay in the bit you stay in the bit that they're reacting to you don't go hey people people are applauding if you're angry and that's why they're applauding you stay in that energy or if you're perplexed you stayed you keep in it by the way at a length it keeps them excited about it it keeps them and that changed a lot for me it may be more about the way I was already knew that being is a person they teach that too if they moan or boo or they get upset you just stay in it you don't let them rest with course they teach that in pre-k and ya know what taught me I sort of in the beach children that was genetic yeah I come from a long line of people to stand but wait we all do you think we've got a thing I don't think I've got a thing like Chris has got black but you know is range educated doesn't count you did know I know I know I know in there it's in the DNA do you think you have to have a thing have you got you know I think you you gotta figure something out you have a voice you've got that's what a voice thinking about our acts that's what we do is take a subject and just don't leave it alone till there's nothing left of it I think you know for you it's like whatever if it's soap or shampoo you're gonna put the shampoo bottle there right and just poke it in blood usually got you yes there you go there's something there and then for Creighton Chris does it in a way that's even more blatant Casilla even keep repeating if the premise is you know women can't live without money or whatever it is you're well you're chauvinist bullshit things you say women can't go down lifestyle then he'll explain it from 50 angles and they'll say women can't go down no they can't they can't go down for them to do that because that's a richer idea than they're used to hearing from a comedian that's right so he has to teach though I think he's doing the right thing yeah but that's yeah and a lot of comedians have great jokes and they don't like why isn't this working it's not working because the audience does not understand the premise that's right so I just like I'm going to make sure the important if I set this premise up right this joke will always work but if I kind of don't am beep ambi about setting up the premise one of my favorites is is that when white people are rich they're just rich forever and ever even their kids are rich yeah when a black guy gets rich its countdown to when he's poor he's the blackest white guy now although it be negative things we think about black people this fucker you're singing I'm a nigger yes you are the nigger Asst I don't think he could do that you don't even understand really you don't you don't really know him like I've worked with no like you know I wouldn't use it anywhere no exactly these two these two we sound ignorant sometimes you guys don't that's it yes we do guys I don't believe he says it up just because it's play I don't believe it I don't think you've ever said it probably in your life no no no yeah that's it that's the big huge difference between you and me I think well you have said it found the humor of it yeah I haven't found it right nor do I seek it you know Jerry all of a sudden having a great nigger bit would be pretty amazing he retired it yeah he retired it no he did 96 yeah anytime you come even close to cursing people who yeah well I had a conversation with you on the phone once where you said you said the F word is like it's like a Corvette that's what you said and I hung up and I thought well that said the F word yeah it's like a Corvette and I stood later I thought well that's that means it's fast and it's cool it's a good you know it's got power and thrust to it then I thought wait a minute this guy grew up in Long Island and collected Porsches a Chevy engine it's a flashy bullshit and where I grew up Corvette is an awesome car and pussies from Long Island drew drove being more friendly with him - I guess I gotta get a push yes do you think that I think with comedy this it's not a rule of thumb but I think you have to be the underdog there's no place for being above the audience and some people say [Music] well whether it's an illusion or not it's he's different yeah and that's what I mean you're the only one in the room talking you're all that puts you above them period but no Jerry you don't need to say anything beyond that but you don't go on stage talking about you don't go on stage talking about your success and your wealth and what you do do you well I do I do I'm playing that card so I'm actually saying I'm not better than them but I think comedy is about empathy and did you think that you get away from it do you think you lose touch because come on you know what about empathy I think it's about totally different with Jerry I think what are you talking about you do something different yeah I think you do something different yeah well that's ridiculous comedian there is another commune I disagree I think he's more everyman than us cuz I think he looks at things and he takes things that I don't he's not every move the purest observational comic here he is the purest observation coming out of all of us and he does it in a way that nobody would I I can't believe that I live that every day and I never put it just exactly that precise he's a virtuoso he plays it like a viola oh that's very sweet I'm so glad I came did you ever struggle and feel like you weren't good ever even the beginning I mean I can't imagine imagine that you not too long no I was pretty lucky it was a few months the worst that ever was was I was hitting 500 I would have a good show and a bad show and a good show in a bad show and when is that what what stage is that is that first starting out first starting out 21 years old yeah so you were 21 and you started in New York Club and right away your first show was a good or bad bad bad you did five minutes or rise and you sucked four five right so what happened in your I think that's a good question I'm asked all you what what happened between your first time and the second like what made you go all I had to do was do it once yeah and I didn't it I really success wasn't my objective it was just I want to be one of those guys yeah if I could be one of those guys I'm I win everything yeah doesn't money it was not the thing so once I stepped on there the first time that's it I'm now one of these guys right I'm just gonna keep doing this and that was that is that cuz you wanted to hang out with comedians or people perceive you as we wanted that to be your identity you wanted to be out of those people right right no that's where I started in Boston and I felt that there was these comedians they were like this like Olympus that's great guys yeah and I wanted to be one of them and I didn't care if I sucked at it that's right that's that is just qualified people attitude you just want to be one of those guys what was the first bit that you came up with that you thought wow I really got something there it was a bit about street signs and that they should be punctuated because I would read them differently than other people opening for you're like drive slow children [Laughter] similar bit left turn okay yes they do yeah so that enough turn okay it's like we're not that impressed I did that and it killed and and I thought like this is something I'm capable of right right what about you yeah a bit a bit that you thought hey I really have a I came up with something that's a real comedian bit oh my god a real comedian bit I'm so embarrassed I did some horrible bit about a black porn and white porn that was a great black porn the girl I still think about bullet wound in her stretch marks and they look like when you took a picture of the black girl you didn't have her permission like she's and white pointer all airbrushed thing I love about this this is why it is the comedian thing is different really good bits yeah go deep into your head and keep coming back I think I'm sure I I think about that bit honestly yeah once a month because it was the first time and this and I apologize for how naive this sounds that I realized Oh black people live in a different world than white people yes I didn't really know that till I heard that bit so there playboy is different from our play yeah and they're not that thrilled with it they're whining they're whining about we do that it would have been a great bit though if you did that is different than white unfortunately the porn hasn't gotten much better my first bit that I thought that's a real bit was about the tramway between Manhattan and Roosevelt Island 1976 the city was going bankrupt I go oh that's great they're putting up rides for us next thing you know the bit yes I next thing I guess they'll be putting up a roller coaster through the ghetto I couldn't figure that's right how to what work to use that's all that recently on YouTube that it was a time trip for me because I'm finishing ghetto I go that'll be the first roller coaster where they scream on the flat part of the ride that's right 1976 Jenna but I didn't know if I say Harlem maybe that'll be a problem well I don't know what to say I said ghetto that's weird because I caught as weird I why is he saying ghetto what could I say you made economic instead of rice didn't you that's what you're worried about yeah it could have been the Jewish ghetto and was and the poor dangerous people yes that's what he was saying yeah yeah yes that's right what was your first bit that you did on I know really Wow he wrote it last week no it was only it was it was about um I suppose two years before a game a comedian was on the radio and it was a bit that I developed and always brought up it was facts on the internet that I thought was spurious and the animal facts are my favorite so I go through and the and I deconstruct the moat if the person that put it on there why is this and is there you know elephants have been caught swimming two miles out off the coast of England and I go caught swimming like it's illegal and I just thought it was I couldn't believe how easy it was to personify animals and then I felt guilty I thought this is almost cheating because it's instantly funny you and I thought oh so and then I started worried about it's not just being funny it's being proud of your stuff and doing things that other people couldn't do and it started really screwing with me but just going out there and just being funny that's another thing is that are we about to just go out there and be funny what does that mean well it worries me I feel that it's cheating describe think anyone could be funny are you talking about because I feel guilty about just being able to make people laugh so I wanna I wanna do no no on stage I want to think I wanted to go and that wasn't just luck he worked on that bit and I couldn't come up with that because I'm also conscious about comedians who go out there and they they're anodyne and say and they say things we could all think they don't do very well 20 minutes in get to a they get quickly to a place the rest Dave we're sort of elitist and we think that we know what's good and what's about but there are comedians out there that can sell arenas around the country particularly in Britain and they got there and they say isn't it funny you take an umbrella out and it doesn't rain and yet the times and people are going yeah it's true they couldn't be laughing any harder that's going on yeah but they can't laugh anymore yeah but there's also a level above that because like when you follow guys like that who get right to the easiest possible laughs and they get a huge laugh you can still when you go on stage you can feel that people go yeah but this is now anybody can get hot have a hot year play this big place that big place who the hell has ever sustained a career not being funny nobody yeah you can't not being really truly I want it to be back in the show because one of the things that bothered me about acting is a lot of people just say they can do it and and can certainly there's nobody in this world that says they can do it know and can't know people that say cz laughs yeah cheap laughs doesn't exist like people people say things about like like comedians at curse and comedians that don't curse if you say if you use fuck you're getting an easy laugh let's see you go get a laugh with fuck so easily yeah I'd by the way I don't mind if I'm getting a laugh on something that's like I have certain things in my act I have laughs that I get that are I feel like I got a laugh somewhere the nobody's gotten laughed before I feel that way sometimes yeah but then I get laughs from like this is a huge broad cheap laugh and I'm enjoying the hell out of it you know I think I think I'll do that but I'll cut that for the DVD no I don't want out there I don't want it documented that I've got a cheap laugh if you guess then onstage and say it and it works that big then then it's yours and to cut it out because you're embarrassed that that's kind of not identify I have to work on it I have to give it something else this is where I think that I'm judged I let myself be judged you I want I want you guys to go well let me tell you what impressed me if you leave it in that's what will impress me like when I've started to take put an hour together when I get to the like after I've written all this stuff and I started deciding what am I gonna stop doing there are bits that I got to through technician work and through survival instinct that I don't believe in I've had bits that kill and I get rid of them thank you because because I just realizing that about it and I think I think this bit two against two this bid against two this bit is not working because I know how to do stand-up it's not working because it's something that's important to me and and I don't need it great and or it's this is a laugh of gotten before no I'll take stuff out of a special because yeah I covered that too much you know but yeah but just what he's saying but just by virtue of the fact that it was he thinks it was easy I don't want to do a thing that anyone in the audience could do I don't want my job yeah exactly I think we are talking about the joke about us I mean I've never done a fart joke but I've heard fart jokes that made me laugh yeah will you choose your face you've made me cry with shit jokes so he's got about 10 minutes on shit that's all throughout the act it's not even like a shit David Hasselhoff's head in the movie I laughed at the years and years ago I saw a comic in some horrible Club bombing with the guitar and he sang sittin on a cock because I'm gay I'm in the shower well I did I laughed I loved that's a clever funny laughing you can't be the one who decides why you like something it doesn't matter I remember reading one time about Elaine Boosler talking about a bit Letterman did in 75 about toothpaste that he would spit into the sink and he would let it dry and he would serve it as after-dinner mints when people would come over it's a stupid joke and she said I don't know why but I think about that joke all the time yeah and I think about that joke who is it a great joke no but there's something in that joke in the same way there's something in that yes that you can't Oh to the contrary there's something in there yes but I tell you the difference is he's built in the irony the comedian is built in the irony of how mad and disgusting and funny that is that comedian hasn't built in any irony we built in the irony we're laughing because we put irony onto it no I don't like joke I don't think so I really think that we just love that bit you just love a bit that's funny yeah and you worry about the industry you worry about the business of comedy not right now I mean any girl goes up and down it's shake it is pretty strong these days right now it's doing pretty well it's as strong as you are what that drives me to do is continue doing that what I think is selling my tickets which is refreshing the act every what it's also nice that these know people are out there they can't wait to see you and that also that's a responsibility because it's like you say you know people they hire a babysitter they have an argument they've got to park the car they spend whatever you know they've gone to a theater is responsibility that's what I have something special to say and I don't think it's just enough to do 60 minutes of them laughing because they can't take that with them right whereas if you say some of that's that's interesting or resonates or that's different they can take it with all the best bits you remember it's stayed with you for 20 years and it's the gift that keeps on giving if you see what he's saying is because he's gay he has to sit some talk beautifully over the template Otis Redding thought he was some guy they threw the lame gage yeah by writing the Anderson Cooper's gonna be tower hnd check with his wife is there anything they could change this in it know that no one could ever spoof that sitting on the dog of the bay there's no there's no way exactly touch people they're gonna be moved is he just sort of sitting on the car okay or is he hitting on the balls is up right up but if you said sittin on some balls cuz the car attached to them is inside of me because I'm gay does not Otis Redding didn't I also be laughing and they can't like you scan they they haven't got it let's walk away and I go god any stops there's no place to go he's there I love bits do the whistle I love them [Laughter] [Laughter] I have a question because there's an interesting comparison here which is that everybody here is filthy except for you you're perfect you're perfectly clean I mean you never hurt perfect do you say shit on stage or asshole no that was it right about the one tower or something yeah yeah yeah we did the finger so you've you've said the f-word once on stage no I in the old when I was a kid I used to before I felt like I didn't want to really did it get laughs yeah well but you cut out cuz she would give away you felt guilty about it your photos tell me what the bit was go on it was a Superman bit and it was something about how inept the this newspaper would have to be that these people they don't even see the resemblance these are journalists and the glasses just completely disguises this guy and then it was something about meantime two of them are stuck in a fucking cave every week you know and that was the bit and then I said well let me see if it works without the word right and I took the word out didn't work and that's what bothered me okay you don't like with them of it and the edge of that it needed that but it's not about the swear word there it's about you to get in the rhythm no it's about you getting worked up yeah it's about this guy is he means this he's so annoying right a fucking cave you're as funny that's contempt you're the cave there all right if I if I was a good enough comedian in those days to change the joke but it bothered me that it didn't work at all without the word but I think the interesting thing now was is that they laughed at that because they saw your face on your that makes it funny and I don't know how to supplant that with something else that would communicate the anger I didn't know how to do that but this is this is what they do know yeah I think we all do it a little bit but you guys do it a lot and you do it most of all that you can be split spluttering and spitting and saying the same thing over again but because you're getting angrier you're making me laugh harder because I'm laughing at you I'm laughing at you in the situation angry at this and I believe you I believe you're angry and I think when I've had I've had different feelings about the word fuck like I made a rule for myself one year because I felt like I watched a show of my nose like this is getting stupid but it's all about context it's the way it is about context you know it's all about fear it where do you fear you fear you're fearing this bits not gonna work yes stand-up is unlike any other art form in that way that you you can do you like if you're a musician you're gonna be pretty exact every time you perform but you look back on shows and you go I messed all that up that was I I had I was driven by fear and instead of by I mean I didn't tell with fear more viscerally at almost anyone I mean yeah the you feel the audience's fear your own fear the whole show is about quelling fear went and and that's what you're talking about when you have a bit that you really are confident in and you know the end of its really strong and the audience feels your fear level go down yeah and they relaxed and they go oh he seems to be very confident in this one yep and but what do you fear now though Jerry what do you fear now the same thing what though what's that that they don't work funny ya know there's two different things there the person being working something working is not something not being funny it's just fears the first fear is you're not gonna pay attention that's the black bigger than not being funny if they pay attention and it's still a show yeah here's something I've never done in my entire career sound check I just I'll check every show so - why you know I'd really sour check when I walk out I never do it I tell them I go like this if I need more that's what I tell them I'll do if I needed in the monitors more I'll go this sound check I'm worried I'm worried about if I have to I just want to know where the stage is I want to know if there's a pit I wanna yeah I want to know the coop I like getting so nice by the room I don't want any surprises so I don't know I go is that gonna be off that exits I don't want anything any surprise I like the surprise I didn't bring 15 minutes but you gotta go there no I also have this fear of not knowing where the fucking theater is I mean some limo with some guy don't fucking know what if he's kidnapping me what he's taking me to his fucking lair Fissel there i think i think comedy well when you become comedians though isn't it isn't it to do with controlling a situation it's like a relationship again it's yeah maybe you know your woman is with you cuz you assume she loves you because she's there every day but you still have to work on her liking you in order for this to work right as a relationships will come and they're excited but I want to do that my being myself and of course like me but I suppose some and that worried me I think the reason I did stand-up was I thought I'd and my Spurs in a way I mean most comedians slog round 15 years and they want to get a sitcom I walked into the BBC with a thing I made and it was the office and then after the office I thought I should show that I can do this other thing this stand-up thing I always ask to get asked this question you must get asked all the time is there anything you shouldn't joke about and I would say no there's nothing you shouldn't joke about it depends what the joke is should it's good well can you I don't think that there's a bad thing to talk about because I think that I agree a great thing about comedy is taking people to places that they have fear and foreboding and turning and making them laugh in that place how you help them I also think that um that there is that this despite of people thinking that comedy is your conscience taking a day off I know my conscience never takes a day off you've gotta be able to justify it you don't ever think it was a joke it was a terrible thing and someone was hurt but it was a joke you don't think like that do you you don't think that comedy is the be-all and end-all of something you still have responsibility to not hurt an innocent person no I think the comedy is the be-all and end-all well that's our job is to think that I just have a rule on my old show our charge our responsibility is to think that it's the b-line we all racist jokes you tell real I wouldn't I know I'm saying if you think that if you think that someone you'll get a laugh hey yeah I'm black remember yeah yeah talk about what they do not what they are of course some crazy shit you talk about the crazy shit but if you think they are I don't know how it all operates sometimes I don't like I have said things on stage that I if I take them just as statements they're the worst things that any person could say I usually do like I don't know why it's always rape I guess it's the worst thing ever yeah but I used to do a joke that ended with a reference to rape and then while I was there I would say you know you should never rape anybody unless you have a good reason like you want to fuck somebody and they won't let you what are you gonna do not fucking live that's no solution gonna have to rape them and I used to beg but used to kill and I've never gotten in trouble for it no one's ever written it what's that but that's clear that you don't know but I'm you're playing it like that so what's one where I'm like I know I'm fine saying this I don't feel bad saying it and the audience I've seen all kinds of people like you can do that that's part of being famous you can't that's the kind of thing you kinda can't get away with not not famous that's that is dance step he just tapped danced over six laser beams that's what we like about that joke yeah look at that he didn't touch one laser bits right I would never out people I remember uh Ricky Martin used to you know who's gay it came out but I used to always watch comedians talk about his gayness before he came out right on shows and I think that was like the mean shit in the world yeah and I had no problem saying la vida loca sucked of course you no need to say that guy I like that son but to say that he did was so there are what they do not actually I like the video look but you know what I mean like or something actually it's a reworking of sitting on the dock of the bay how long do you wait when you go out before you come back as an encore I don't wait at all I go thanks very much good night you don't make them wait well I don't I come I used to come back I used to have the Encore be an afterthought like throws you know people used to yell out it's the only time I would do old bits people would yell out bits they want me to do and stuff but now I actually close with like I have a bit that I close with but really the really dynamite closing stuff is the Encore so like I'll leave on something that's it's my third favorite bit and it feels like the Encore is like alright I'll do a little more and this and then the Encore is way better than anything I did like a man that's like it would a band oh yeah really it really makes people really really happy but I can't risk people not asking for us it's a weak show it's too short left a bit how you like to think I've left a bit that I couldn't possibly do at the beginning because they hate me right but now now now I've won them over they'll get away with this bit that's the other thing I don't do it always long a show and then you then you go get the fuck out of there but don't I think you're gonna come back no I mean maybe they do warn them do you say I don't do I I've been doing it long enough also if there's a long fucking show how long do you do about our 40 last tour I do it an hour 10 what do you do about 90 minutes really yes that's see that's that's they're both long to me what do you do Joe 1:15 when I do it yeah oh yeah somewhere in there 10 120s exactly yeah Wow I think that office you know actually make my money my I've amassed of my fortune actually telling jokes so extra 20 he does has made him yeah I've never laid gentlemen I'm not here on the side but don't you ever think as well when you say we make people have this feeling of laughter and they pay us money what if they discover they can do it themselves they can do it themselves we are a high-octane version of it we are we're pros we're drugs yes they can play touch football too I want to tell them they can do play they can watch each other's [Laughter] good every time the guys they make money on the Super Bowl aren't going if people play football in their backyard they're not gonna watch this when you go you know I would cost me to have my kid next time I'm doing it myself yeah it's not like that you know you need to go to the doctor I think you could I bet that that's a lot of bullshit I bet if if we concentrate like if it was considered a good idea to train people to do surgery in their houses yeah you'd have like a kitchen and you'd have like a little operating room I could go on the internet and get these fucking take out an appendix 18-wheeler into a little space about a week ago fucking them and I said you know what I guarantee you there's fucking heart surgery that's not as hard as I watched the guy going to a loading dock aback yeah and I stopped and I said that was amazing did an encore and I stopped that I said that was incredible he goes what and I said that was beautiful anyone like he didn't go oh thank you he was like yeah no I know should we do some um should we do some promos that we might use or whatnot what do you think you can learn yeah okay one sure right there right two three hey what's up this is Chris Rock and please join me and some of the greatest comedians in the world louis c.k Jerry Seinfeld Ricky Gervais saan HBO's talking shit with funny people hi I'm Jerry Seinfeld welcome to talking funny we hope you'll join us I'm with the louis c.k Chris Rock and Ricky Gervais I'm Louis CK please join me and my guests Chris Rock Jerry Seinfeld and Ricky Gervais as we talk about comedy and come hi I'm Ricky Gervais join me Louie CK Chris Rock and the funniest comedian in the world Jerry Seinfeld not my words he's gonna do one more so they don't can't use them yeah we all use no no no you can know it yeah and it's gonna be I'll sue you brothers [Laughter]

Channel: Ken Jones

Views: 7,018,322

Rating: 4.9003153 out of 5

Keywords: louis ck, chris rock, Jerry Seinfeld, Ricky Gervais, hbo, comedy, special, laugh, Funny, Humor, Comedian

Id: OKY6BGcx37k

Length: 49min 33sec (2973 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 30 2012

Reddit Comments

[u/hermeslyre]

This is the funniest shit ever. We need a Talking Funny part 2.

[u/cydus]

Really good watch. Great idea to have them just sit and chat.

[u/i4NDR3W]

Sitting on a cock cause I'm gay

[u/Dontfrown]

Everytime this is posted people point out how out of place Gervais is. What they neglect to understand is that he is a Producer on the show, and is essentially a quasi-host. Maintaining the room, acting as an audience reaction and keeping the ball rolling. I for one don't find him out of place, I'd you've seen his stand up specials you'll see how good of a comedian he is. Sure he's what some people call edgy, and he's no Louis, Seinfeld or Rock but he holds his own, isn't afraid to play devil's advocate. He's a much needed balance to the programme, otherwise it would just be very preachy.

[u/captbutts]

Does he do the whistle?

[u/ObserverPro]

I love this. I wish this was a whole series.

[u/mckinley72]

The best minute from the whole special, IMO.

[u/ConjuredMuffin]

I didn't know we were supposed to hate Gervais

[u/Burn_it_all_down]

Why do you think Chris talked so little?