stranger danger at kmart

molly what are you get off there get off there right now before someone sees you can you turn around i'm trying to bust one out dude you're you're free oh i just punched myself on the balls by slapping my i heard that oh that actually hurt dude i almost knocked the battery compartment out of my controller [Applause] [Music] come on kids let's go to kmart come on yes just run across the road you need to check your other place for traffic not yet why did you run into a bin you [ __ ] idiot i'm just really excited to go to the shops because you're gonna get some new underpants you don't need any underpants you've just got we just put new underpants on you just before we left now i need new underpants all right well i guess we just underpants come on yay you know underpants you want to ride the horses now boys you can go have a ride on the horses but remember last time you get sick real easily and you throw up all over grandma's car and her fake leg so you have to promise that you will not throw up if you get on i promise i won't get sick again i promise i'm a big boy now i don't get sick from spinny things neither do i okay well hang on hold up let me do a little test first now spin around three times spin kick on keep going keep going one and two yeah three and three how do you feel i'm i'm fine oh this little [ __ ] oh no i [ __ ] hate going to the shops you guys come on let's go to the shops yeah what what is it josh we do not serve brushes dude the large amount of brushes ever taken vr chat we're now denying service to players using the brush avatar discrimination against [ __ ] brushes it's racism it's what it is boys yeah racism and i will not stand for i can't believe that they would ban upstanding minorities like us from their establishment i've been doing nothing but good [ __ ] sake all right quick let's get in here before the security notices [ __ ] all over the pile wow it's so much bigger than i remember ah yeah that's what i said when i look down i've got a big dick shut up i do have a picture dude you have a very small dick how do you know you haven't seen it you're my kid i've seen you in the ultra all right look you know what it doesn't matter look where is where do we need to go first come on i've got different side of mummy than you did that means do i need to take you back out into the car park and spank the living [ __ ] out of you no that's how you were conceived you know me spanking the [ __ ] out of your mum in the car park behind a bin actually buddy you were conceived in this kmart oh where where which aisle i'm 69 no oh you hit him too hard it doesn't it doesn't it's not about hitting him literally anything that ever happens to him like if you scare him too much it's like flipping a coin honestly it doesn't matter stop feeling everywhere quick we're gonna get over here before we get the cleaner finds quick no josh i don't know where i'm going we need toilet paper we need pokemon cards and we need condoms extra large we can't buy them all together they'll put us on a list if we buy all of them in one go come on boys over it look how much of a waste this is you put a wet floor sign here there's not even a wet wet floor oh yeah there is look at your giant [ __ ] all over your brother oh i'm allergic [Applause] no don't start don't do it oh my god tells me i am okay i've had enough of this [ __ ] josh booze can we get some beer yummy yummy you're coming oh my god look at this yeah [ __ ] prices we're getting ripped off in australia what the [ __ ] 13 bucks a carton what the [ __ ] you're three [ __ ] you're three three yep oh oh my head no don't hit me too much so i got an upset tommy oh what's what's wrong mate huh yeah if you hit me too much i can't hold the poo poos in i don't know your brother's run off because i've abused him what'd you do that for did you learn how many more dvo's do you need to get stuck i don't know how many more times do you need to go to court for domestic violence come on mate he's going to be around here somewhere smashing he can't get too far he's got the iq of a mcchicken nugget oh yes yummy miss making no he's not down here come on next one come on smash egg no it's not down here come on next one smash shake smashing hey there little man you want to try out these new sleeping mattresses pretty soft i got candy oh my leg i like candy yeah come on in here little man let me get the zipper and then you can get my zipper oh yeah oh molly yeah what are you doing i met this nice man he's gonna let me unzip him hey there mostly armed man this is the kmart crash where you drop your kids off when they've been naughty i'll fix them right up okay look molly come out here don't talk to strange men that sleep in kmart tents dude come on please don't touch my kid who do i stay with okay save me you don't even know who he is come on mate come on come here you remember what i told you about the no no square i'll tell you right now that dude is going to stick his entire fist in your no no square if you're not come on i'll put i'll put caramelized butter on there though don't you worry about that come here oh yeah good stuff okay mate come here okay molly i'm going to talk to you talk to you about a couple of things about about the world okay what is it yeah sometimes kmart and walmart and south dakota you're going to meet old strange men they want to put their thumb inside your bum that's right he was a nice old man yeah that's how they start it's only just look look i'm not exactly sure what's happened to baby smashing yet but you've got to stay away from that man okay stay away from him yeah all right we'll get home and watch the jeffrey epstein documentary on netflix and you'll know all about it we're gonna find smashing come on come on hmm let's reply dad dad what i found smashing i found smashing come on how could you find smashing he's he's a he's a flashlight now oh yeah i could smell him show me the reason come on then come on he's over here look at this pizza station holy [ __ ] it is him money smashing melly josh where have you been i've been everywhere i've seen some things a nice older gentleman gave me um what'd you say it was a prostate exam okay that's smashing take what happened what's the prostate he said it's something that needs to be checked every 20 minutes specifically by him that's not true that's not true i want a prostate you do not want to prostate exam not in the hang on where did he give you the prostate exam was in the doctor's office it could be legit it was in my bum what funny oh my baby no i mean where did he do it did he do it in a registered doctor's office or did he do it in little caesar's restroom uh yeah cubicle three okay yeah he wasn't he look he know when he said he was a doctor he put towels down on the toilet seat well it was tot it was two-ply toilet paper but let's not rush over the details you know you're describing sexual assault is that why my bum hurts you've clearly been loosened up oh all over the slicing machine i was going to have one i don't know this is what we're doing now is it can we get pokemon cards now i've been a good boy oh you said you said lollies and we could get bath towels so we could go for a swim in the bathtub didn't he smashing yeah look at you you've done nothing but harass us and let me get harassed by a nice old man with very soft fingers at least he was nice to me as well he bought me chicken nuggets how's that even trade he buys you three nuggets and then i followed you around for the past three years cleaning up your [ __ ] because for some reason you [ __ ] every single time anything happens to you you better get cleaning josh okay you're like like a time delayed safe your reflexes are obviously a bit slower where are you going i'm gonna overdose in heroin in the back in the bathroom you're too old and you're too old to enter that can i have a heroine what the [ __ ] is wrong with you josh you said this would be a good recording before we started and look at me you've given me this avatar how am i supposed to think of my cousins with these fingers why do you say these things because you always do this to us it means smashing your little [ __ ] peasants every time you want to record i paid a thousand dollars for these avatars me and tab spend hours slaving over exactly how the poo hits surfaces so you better poo and enjoy it too i've had stuff what are you gonna do [ __ ] yourself would you do yourself yes i might [ __ ] myself but that doesn't matter josh all right can't we just be a family please please mom squad please we've got an abusive father i'm gonna go find that pervert pedo dude i'm gonna see if we can work out some kind of trade for both of yous and free nuggets we get more nuggies i don't know if i want chicken nuggets now we [Applause] rich look if you don't stop bouncing remember you've got fragile gastrointestinal systems and you've got a flaccid penis that doesn't even get hard you piece of [ __ ] my tummy doesn't feel so cool but i'm gonna keep dancing because i'm happy i'm having so much fun [Laughter] they're your kids now kmart they're kmart kids i'm never never dealing with those children again see you later kids

Channel: JoshDub

Views: 4,794,471

Keywords: vr, joshdub, virtual reality, vr gaming, funny moments, vr funny moments, best vr moments, memes, comedy, funny, mully, juicy, your narrator, narrator, juicyfruitsnacks, eddie, eddie vr, the boys, the boys vr

Id: yO9QPKYgf4g

Length: 12min 25sec (745 seconds)

Published: Wed Mar 24 2021