SML Movie- Duggie Needs Call of Duty! 2023- Full Episode

I'm just going to lay back watch some TV and enjoy my drink hey Bo can we put up Christmas lights tonight please put up Christmas lights it's the day before Christmas Eve putting up Christmas lights would be totally pointless at this point we're just going to take them down in 3 days but Bo we're the only house in the neighborhood that doesn't have Christmas lights that's because we're the only house in the neighborhood that's smart enough not to raise our electric bill it wouldn't raise it that much oh that's easy for you to say because you don't have a job I pay the bills but Bo how will Santa Claus see our house without Christmas lights no body in this house believes in Santa Claus what about your daughter oh come on Penelope is way too smart to believe in Santa Claus watch Penelope get in here what Dad do you believe in Santa Claus yeah see she doesn't believe wait what you believe in Santa Claus how old are you you don't know how old I am what yeah of course I know how old you are I know how old my own daughter is hold on don't tell me what did me and your mom get divorced wait okay what month is your birthday oh my God I hate you oh come on it see she doesn't believe in Santa Claus Bo who's going to help me put lights up please help me it's not going to be me because I'm not having a good day I'm tired my shirt has a stain on it and this is my favorite shirt okay I'm not in the mood to do it tonight find somebody else what who Could That Be hello hey bling Guy mom want to know if you're coming to our house for Christmas hell no but why Bo who is that on the phone it's just my brother Jonathan oh is that your wife tell her that Daddy says hi she'll know who it is I'm not telling her that Bo ask him if he's ever h Christmas lights I'm not going to ask him if he's hung them is your wife asking if I'm hung tell her I'm hung like a horse e Jonathan Bo since you won't hang Christmas lights for me maybe he will is your wife asking if I can hang her Christmas lights I'm on my way no Jonathan don't look what you did now I have to see my brother but Bo that's good family time no not with him it's not no no no that can't possibly be him hello cover your eyes cover your eyes Bo you cover your eyes why it's a surprise what is it just trust me un cover your eyes I'm not coming outside until you give me a hint let's just say Santa came a little early this year that doesn't sound good just come on okay okay don't peek don't peek only open your eyes when I tell you to you better not have your wiener out again Jonathan that was one time I swear okay open them I don't see anything you have to turn around oh my God Jonathan you put lights on our house Jonathan you're so amazing thank you Jonathan you hear cat bring guy you're like screaming my name Jonathan you didn't even stick with a theme it's just a mess you've got a manger and you got Santa in a speedboat Bo it's the thought that counts he did something nice for me something that you wouldn't do oh you hear Z Bren guy I pleased your wife I did something that you can't do I just didn't feel like doing it Jonathan Jonathan you should come inside you hear that b guy consent Jesus Christ Jonathan this couch is so comfy do you mind if I stay the night no leave I believe your wife asked me to come inside not the first time she's asked me to do that Jonathan I'm so glad that you came how' you know is there a stain oh I'm so embarrassed ew Jonathan just go fine but before I go I'm making my list to Santa do you want me to write anything on there for you you're writing a letter to Santa Claus Jonathan you're 30 years old Santa isn't real you don't believe in Santa no Jonathan we have this conversation every year there is no such thing as Santa Claus but I have proof Jonathan the the movie The Santa Claus with Tim Allen is not proof well fine I'll leave but before I go I'll make sure that you believe no matter what I do okay great just leave fine nonsense you believer her all right baby I'm out if you need me you got my number no she doesn't man I'm so glad he's gone did you hear the door close I'm going to go make sure he left what he left my door open well at least he left I need to get a restraining order on him Jonathan what are you doing in my tree I I got lost on the way out no you didn't get out of here fine go go get get out of my house I'm going to make him believe in s Jesus Christ did you see that see that's why he's not allowed over here he's annoying but Bo he's so nice though nice you think him making inappropriate jokes every 2 seconds is nice Bo he's your brother you love him no no I don't love him I don't even believe he's related to me he doesn't look like me I'm just really stress out and I want to go to bed bo you should go say good night to your daughter she doesn't like me of course she does Bo you're her father you only get to see her one night the whole year go spend time with her tell her you love her and that she means a lot to you and you work really hard to take care of her yeah yeah you know what Karen you're right I do work hard I'm going to go upstairs and tell her how much I love her okay I'm just going to go in there and talk to my daughter yeah I'm going to be like hey Penelope h no I got to give her like a cute nickname like I'm a cool dad like like hey Penny no I don't like that um hey hey ly ly that's a fat name I'm just going to wing it hey there beanie weenie beanie weeny what the hell does that mean no I've never called her that in my entire life that doesn't even make sense okay listen Penelope I'm I'm not really good at this whole talking thing of even really being a dad for that matter I mean you were an accident I I mean not like a bad accident like a like a good accident like like when you get rear ended and and then the person hits you really hard and you think that your car is going to be total but then you get out and look at it and it's really not that bad it's just a little dent in the back and you can probably buff it out you know it's that's like you and and then then you you learn to love the dent because it's it's your Dent you know it's what makes that car your car it's it's just a little dent in your car that helps you tell it apart from other cars that's that's you you're you're my Dent you know like when I'm in the Walmart parking lot and there's two cars right next to each other look identical I know which one's mine cuz it's the one with the big dent in the back and and that's you you're my nice little Dent that could be a nickname denty that that kind of sucks listen Penelope I what I'm trying to say is I love you and I I probably shouldn't I'm probably not around as much as I should be and it's cuz I'm working you know I I want to take care of you I mean what would you ra would you rather that I was around all the time and we be poor or or I'm not around as much cuz I'm working and we'd be not as poor but I mean I can still afford to buy you things like like fortnite and those nice headphones you have that you you can't hear me can you you're not even listening P Penelope what what Dad what are you doing here I just I wanted to I I I I I don't I don't know so Bo what did she say oh she said she loves me so much and I'm the best dad ever a that's so sweet bu yeah so Bo do you want to fool around no there's been plenty of fooling around already tonight come on Bo give me some sugar no I'm not in the mood your brother Jonathan would give me attention oh oh I'm sorry so you want me to be like Jonathan huh well Jonathan pees the bed do you want me to pee the bed okay I'll pee the bed no that's not what I meant no it's too late I'm peeing the bed b you better not I just cleaned your sheets I'm joking I don't even have to go good night okay so I'm going to break into his house leave a bunch of presents and then Brooklyn guys is going to have to believe Santa is real now to get this door open just nut roasting on an open fire Jack Frost at your nose We wish you a Merry Christmas we wish you merry Christmas we wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year yeah once Bren guy sees all these presents he's going to have to believe in Santa well time to get out of here one of the ornaments fell Santa would not let that happened time to put it back wow it's really high up there silent night holy night holy no no no no no Karen what was that noise go back to sleep boy n okay oh I hope broken guy didn't hear that I try to pick up this tree so he doesn't notice picking up your Christmas tree because I dropped it on the ground rling iy would be so mad at me if you found out I what you said CL no no no no no no okay what was that noise what if it's a Roba bodyy I'm going to go check it out what the hell is going on ah Brooklyn guy somebody get this damn tree off me so Brooklyn guy do you believe in Santa Claus now Jonathan what are you doing in my house I'm not Jonathan I'm Santa Claus Santa Claus oh hey baby lucky for you this Santa comes more than once a year but Jonathan get out of here it's not before I get my milk and cookies don't you dare touch my damn milk and cookies pour some milk pour some milk chocolate chip cookies in my Tomy there're so yummy hope booking guys doesn't kill me what's all that noise Santa what are you doing here you came early not again Jonathan I'm going to kill you Dad Santa's here that's not Santa Claus that's that that's uh that that's uh that's St Nicholas is who that is that's his that's his full name oh my god dad you're always so technical Santa's here your father called me and asked me to come over and see what she wanted for Christmas oh my god dad you know Santa yeah yeah we're we're real tight we're we're like Brothers yeah we're so tight your dad said I could even eat all of his cookies I don't know about that I think I said you could have one or two no you definitely said every single one dad oh my God this is the coolest thing ever you're the coolest dad ever but really okay well you better get to bed cuz me and Santa need to talk oh okay okay Jonathan that was a very nice thing you did so I'm not going to call the police but you are the police I know I know but I'm not going to press charges for all the destruction you did in my living room and for breaking into my house that was not me Jonathan just get out of my house okay okay I'm just going to take these and be on my way no no no you leave the cookies oh come on where's your Christmas spirit what a ridiculous night but that was so nice of Jonathan oh yeah it was really nice how he broke into our house destroyed our Christmas tree and ate all our cookies very nice a but he made Penelope so happy yeah whatever H good night Bo good night Cameron oh boy Karen I told you I'm not in the mood then what are you poking me with that's my candy can Jonathan what the hell are you doing in here get out of here hey Dad did you know that if you eat paper then you poop out trees that's not true Jeffy yes it is because paper comes from trees and trees are brown just like your poop and when you poop it looks like logs so you're basically just replanting poopy stinky trees don't eat paper Jeffy I'm still going to eat the paper anyway well Jeffy stop eating the paper give me the paper what you gave me a paper cut on my finger Jeffy it's a little tiny cut you cut the bow oh no Marvin we have to call a doctor I'm not going to call a doctor over a little tiny paper cut there's blood everywhere I think you hit an artery okay I'll call a doctor ow hey there somebody call a doctor yeah my daddy cut my finger off oh my God let me see do you think you can reattach it or is my finger going forever okay that's just a paper cut I told him it was just a paper cut but it's all the way down to the bone okay you guys call the doctor over a paper cut well he won't stop crying and screaming and we don't know what to do cuz I'm going to bleed out and die no just put a Band-Aid on it baby can you go please grab a Band-Aid actually I think we're out of Band-Aids Marvin well now I'm definitely going to bleed out and die we don't have Band-Aids okay look I'm going to go to the store and buy you guys some Band-Aids but that's me being very nice because this is not my responsibility yes please go buy us some Band-Aids okay I'm going to go to the store ooh can you get me a Lunchable okay I will get you a Lunchable too too does anybody else want something from the store yeah actually can you get me the rainbow donut stackable bigger to smaller yellow stick toy on the baby aisle okay I'll keep an eye out for that Marvin would you like something from the store no I just want you to get the Band-Aids great actually I just realized I don't wear socks with my shoes and I'd like some socks please okay I will get you some socks I don't have shoes is that you asking me to get you shoes yes would you like some socks for those shoes I don't know maybe later no I you know what I'm going to get the socks now so I don't have to make two trips okay let me see if I have this right you want Lunchables socks and shoes you want socks and you want the rainbow donut stackable bigger to smaller yellow stick toy from the baby aisle am I forgetting anything the Band-Aids oh of course the whole reason I was going in the first place Jesus okay I'm going to go to the store do not call me with anything else you reached your limit okay let's see I got the Lunchables the Band-Aids the shoes the socks now I'm just missing the rainbow donut stackable bigger to smaller yellow stick toy thing thing where would I even find that oh I guess that's what he described wait there's a bigger one down here it's not my [ __ ] kid I don't care I can't believe I just bought all that stuff Brooklyn guy you were just too nice hey oh please don't shoot me tell giovan I'll give him his money back wait oh sorry I thought you were somebody else you got any change oh um no sorry I don't have any on me you're a doctor you have money well I mean that's true but I mean right now I only got this card give me that um okay yeah you know what I'll give you my credit card and you can go in there and buy anything you need and then I'll cancel it in a couple minutes so you have until then to buy anything you want thank you credit card man okay I'm going to call the credit card company and cancel that card okay so should I cancel the card now or give them a minute to buy a drink or something first I'm just going to cancel it now okay come on pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up come on time is of the essence here we're sorry we cannot get to your call this time please call back later oh you got to be [ __ ] kidding me not right now no no no we can't do that right now I'm going to call back come on come on somebody answer I know somebody works there come on it's not that busy we're sorry [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] no no no [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] this is bad this is bad there's a homeless guy in Target with my credit card I got to go find him while calling back okay food food he's probably hungry so he'd be in the food aisle right like where where you at homeless guy hobo anybody see a homeless guy with my credit card he's probably got a buggy full of stuff like really nice stuff oh hello [ __ ] here's your crap oo I want my shoes come on answer oh I want my rainbow donut stackable bigger to smaller yellow stick toy pick up the phone I want my socks God damn it they're not answering me who are you trying to call go sper shut up no jokes I'm trying to call the credit card company because I gave my credit card to a homeless guy why would you give your credit card to a homeless guy well he asked me for change and I told him I didn't have any CH a these are too small well you buy your own damn shoes you didn't tell me your size can you return them no just wear those I I gave my credit card to a homeless guy because he asked me for change I told him I didn't have any change I had a credit card and he said well you're a doctor so you should have money and I said fine here take my credit card buy whatever you want before I cancel the credit card but I can't cancel the credit card because they won't answer the goddamn phone I want my launcha B wait it's in the bag a I wanted a bigger rainbow donut stackable bigger to smaller yellow stick to well yeah you're not my kid a I wanted Pizza you didn't specify everybody shut the hell up hello [ __ ] why don't you just call them what what do you think I've been doing are you stupid what do you think I've been doing for the last 20 minutes they're not answering the phone wait hello it's ringing it's ringing [ __ ] they're not answering their phone why don't just call them one more time okay fine I'll call him one more time jeez I wonder if they answer this time nope they didn't answer oh look the news breaking news the employees at my credit card call center are currently on strike so if you have a problem with your credit card your phone call will not be answered at this time more so credit card fraud is on the rise so be careful who you give your information to oh well that's just perfect the day I decide to give my credit card to a homeless guys today the credit card workers decide to go on strike why don't you go on the website and freeze your card I didn't know I could do that I'm going to try that head another look I got the Lop oh oh great it says the website's down for maintenance and that I should call what the news breaking news the credit card website designers have joined in on the so not only will you not be able to call in you won't be able to log in online either oh you've got to be kidding me I'm living in a nightmare hey B look I got the really big ice cream con you want the bite a my Capri son is gone that's cuz you drank it all these socks are weird that's because you put them on over your shoes and on your hands you know I feel like you guys aren't taking my problem seriously well what's he spending your card on hold on let me check let me check my Apple wallet um oh good lord this guy's going crazy what he spent $1,000 at Best Buy he spent $500 at Leslie's Pool Supplies he doesn't even have a pool what would he buy there and look at this he spent $100 at Ruby Tuesdays and tji Fridays pick a day of the week well you're a cop you can arrest him for all this credit card fraud it's not credit card fraud I gave him the card and told him to spend the money then why are you mad because I just thought he was going to buy a drink at Target I thought I was going to cancel the card okay well then what's the last thing he bought oh let's see oh my God he he spent $3,000 at Bed Bath and Beyond why would he even go there well I mean I guess he is homeless he does need a bed and a Bath and Beyond well why don't we go there and see if we catch him well he's going to be gone by now okay well I know the owner of the credit card company why didn't you say so well look I'll go call him and tell him to come over okay oh what do you want Marvin I'm stressed out why are you so stressed out Goodman because my employees at the credit card call center are on strike why are they on strike get this they want more money how selfish of them I have a yacht that needs gas how is my yacht going to get from Tahiti to Morocco without any gas well how much are you paying him an hour a staggering a mindblowing 50 cents an hour what 50 cents an hour you can't do that the minimum wage in America is $8 an hour well I'm not paying that in America I outsourced I built a call center in Thailand so in Thailand you can get a handy for $40 so I'm laying there getting one thinking hm if you can give a handy for $40 you can answer a phone for 50 so I hired 10,000 employees and paid them 50 cents an hour each they were loving it and so was I I loved it so much I bought me a Bugatti well I had to pay for the Bugatti so I lowered everyone's pay to 25 cents an hour now they're outside on strike well could you just like raise their pay for like a day so they'll answer my phone calls no because I didn't get to be a trillionaire by giving people what they want I'm going to let them stomp around outside like a kid at Toys R Us this is a hard lesson they need to learn they know workie I know pay well they were working just fine till you lowered their pay you hush that is enough out of you mister well could you personally cancel my credit card since you own the company yeah I don't know how to do that I usually pay someone to do that so you're going to have to to take that up with them but as far as I'm concerned I got $40 burning a hole in my pocket and I need some beef jerky and not the kind that you eat well great what are we going to do now Marvin well why are you still calling them if you know they're on strike I'm hoping one of them has to go inside to pee and they hear a phone ringing and they want to help a desperate man okay well don't you have a brother brother that's good with like computers yeah so well why don't you call him and see if he can hack into the credit card server to cancel your card Marvin that's a great idea I'll call him what's up brosi what's on the Fly looking guy what's going on Toyota son hello Jonathan oh I see you have socks on your hands trying to avoid a mess I see I do that sometimes too but it doesn't feel like the real thing even though I don't know what the real thing feels like I would assume it doesn't feel like sucks I would suggest rubber gloves my feet hurt I'll rub them calm down Jonathan she needs your feet rub Brooklyn guy okay look the reason I called you is because I gave my credit card to a homeless guy and now he's going on a spending spree so I need you to hack into the credit card company's website and cancel my card I thought you would have a challenge for me but what's in it for me what's in it for Big Johnny Big Johnny yeah what okay what do you want big Johnny I want a key to your house wh why that way I can go in whenever I want and get in your bed but no that's not happening well fine I want a picture of your wife's chest no fine I want one of her shoes ew no I mean come on they don't even fit oh fine here you go oh was it as good for you as it was for me why would it be oh if I'm popey and this is my spinach I'm going to go grab my laptop let's do this thing all right so I grabbed my laptop what's your credit card provider Goodman Bank and Trust oh they have a level one security system easy uh get P the firewall and I'm in really just like that oh yeah oh man he's making a lot of purchases on your account let's put a stop to that and done it's canceled but really it's canceled oh yeah but I can't reverse any of the charges that he made on your account you're going to have to return all that stuff well I can't return the stuff because I didn't buy it and I don't know where the homeless guy is well there's your homeless guy outside here's a bunch of stuff show me okay yay fortnite there he is booklyn guy hey [ __ ] you having fun spending all my money hey credit card man yes I am credit card man I'm going to be taking this back hey you took my credit card I took my credit card because you've been spending my money on pools and PlayStation 5es and TVs and tji Fridays and Ruby Tuesdays yummy rib man yeah I hope you're enjoying your ribs oh don't be mad looking guys look at the life he has now yeah I mean I guess I do feel a little better that he you know made a nice life for himself here you know Marvin I just realized your son hasn't asked for those Band-Aids I went out and got him you know it actually would be kind of nice if you pay me back for all that stuff I went and got for you okay all right I guess that's the last time I do anything nice for hey guys what are you doing oh Cody did you know your mom's famous yeah dude they put her in the magazine twice I didn't know your mom was a model it's like a special coloring magazine where you get to color pictures of the models like look here's your mom waving her tail and here's your mom just standing there oh good my mom's a hippo now that's new a big fat hippo cuz your mom's fat no I get it and your mom's still a whale classic yeah cuz she's a big fat whale guys I get it can we please do something else Cody why is your shirt so small oh I got an extra small shirt to show off my abs here peep them actually this is a new shirt and it shrunk when my mom washed it but it's still a good conversation start Cody you have like a little black piece of something in your tooth what yeah like show me your tooth ah yeah you have like a little black dot like a piece of pepper in your tooth a piece of pepper I haven't eaten any pepper today is it gone sure okay you want to help us color a picture of your mom no guys I said I want to do something else well you can start by getting that piece of pepper out of your tooth wait you said it was gone stupid friend Lunch is ready oh guys Chef peipi said Lunch is ready let's go eat junior is there something in my tooth or not wa look at these sandwiches dude Chef peipi did not made this he got this off of uber East I can tell pardon my language but pretty bitching lunch shift peeee a freak go what did I do to deserve this what's this cheit Don't Mind If I Do let me just light one of these joints up real quick damn it what's wrong Cody I think the Cheez It was too hot it hurt my tooth cheit aren't hot they have no temperature Cody well it hurt my tooth when I bit into it maybe it's that piece of pepper that's on your tooth wait do I have something on my tooth or not yes what you said I didn't I didn't want to talk about it anymore what do you think it is I don't know maybe a cavity no no no that's impossible guys it can't be a cavity I brush my teeth two times a month once on the first and once on the 15th I think you're supposed to brush your teeth two times a day no that would be ridiculous Jor that would waste tooo much toothpaste all that toothpaste going down the drain would end up in the ocean fish don't have teeth they don't need toothpaste and dental floss that would choke a sea turtle no thank you well you're supposed to brush your teeth every day Cody well cavemen didn't brush their teeth and they turned out fine cavemen died when they were like 20 yeah from like falling off a boulder and getting eaten by a bat not their teeth okay well I don't know what to tell you Cody I'm going to eat my sandwich what do you guys really think it's a it's a cavity I think it's a cavity Cody well that would be really bad you guys if my parents find out I have a cavity they'll ground me and send me to Europe send you to Europe why well they say that Europe is full of people who have bad teeth and that's where people with bad teeth belong so if they find out I have a cavity they'll send me to Europe well they will never see you again I know this is bad guys okay let's call a dentist and get your tooth fixed so your parents will never find out okay try one more of these cheit damn it okay fine let's call this dentist come on hey Leah somebody call a dentist yeah Cody has a cavity hey hey nobody has a cavity until I say they have a cavity I'm the dentist I have a degree do you have a degree no that's what I thought now shut up how's my bread smell smell like onions I didn't want onions on my sandwich but they put them on there anyway nobody ever listens to me hey you you like onions no let me see your teeth okay those are actually pretty nice thank you okay but nobody has a cavity until I say they do got it now say ah ah oh no that that actually is a cavity sorry you knew what you were talking about are you sure you're not a dentist I'm not a dentist do you want to be my dental assistant you're pretty good at it yeah sure okay so what do you think we should do now uh fix his cavity H H yes I can curve okay so I can do one or two things here I could use no pain meds and just drill right into your tooth which would hurt really bad but you'd be a badass or I could use pain meds and drill into your tooth but you be a little [ __ ] baby I don't want to be a little [ __ ] baby yeah you don't want to be that Cody so no pain meds no pain meds yes okay but first we're going to have to bill your parents insurance no no no no no we can't tell my parents about this yeah if his parents find out he was a cavity they're going to send him to Europe yeah he'll have to learn to say bonjour that's France Joseph not Europe dude that's still in Europe no it's not yes it is guys can we just focus here please Joseph's trying to say that ratat was filmed in Europe well it wasn't filmed anywhere it was animated it wasn't called Europe atoui it wasn't called France atoui either it was called Ratatouille cuz there were rats Cody know that but where it was filmed doesn't matter it it's all that matters it was filmed in France they were French which is in Europe but no yes yes yes it is yes so shut up stop arguing about it Cody he does nobody he's talking about never does are we still talking about teeth here oh yeah we got to fix his cavity so if he if we don't use the insurance how much does it cost in cash oh it's going to cost about $1,000 $11,000 we don't have that kind of money well the medical bills cost money this ain't Europe okay well what else do you suggest we do um let me see those teeth again uh well they do kind of look like baby teeth I think maybe I could probably pull them out then you could just say you lost it well Cody you still have baby teeth yeah I hit puberty late what okay so how much will it cost to take the tooth out it would still cost about $1,000 what we don't have that kind of money I'm sorry but Dennis got to make money somehow uh I I guess you guys could probably take it out on your own for free mhm mhm what what's going on what I don't know this is weird I'm I'm I'm leaving what the hell was that about Junior I was agreeing I was like we can take it out ourselves we don't need him why didn't you just say that why were you being all secretive about it I didn't want him to know cuz I didn't want him to get mad that we weren't going to use him why were you making such a big deal out of it just say Cody how about this we tie a string around your tooth we slam a door that tooth comes out you just tell your parents you lost your tooth okay anything did not go to Europe let's go okay Cody I have the string tied to this door knob and your tooth so when I slam this door your tooth's going to come flying out okay ow did it come out no it just hit me with the door I didn't slam it hard enough all right are you ready yeah ow did it work no dude let me try it you guys are just beating me up with the door now oh the door doesn't have enough horsepower to pull his tooth out what the door doesn't have enough horsepower to pull your tooth out it doesn't have any horsepower it's a door oh we should use a car right no let's go use a car Cody okay Jeffy this is what we need you to do we have this string attached to your car all the way to Cody's tooth when I say go you floor it so it pulled his tooth out got it Junior all right let's go tell Cody what's going on okay dude all right Cody when I yell go jeffy's going to speed off and pull your tooth out with this car are you sure this is safe Junior yeah it's safe I tied the string to the toe so all the power can pull your tooth out what the tire go Jeffy y Junior stop ow man Cody that tooth is really in there Junior I could have been killed if that string hadn't broke I would have gotten pulled under the tires and run over Dude I knew we should have used rope oh yeah rope would have been a lot stronger no we shouldn't have done it at all man Cody your face looks really bad yeah my face really hurts from the road rash I mean it looks better than the freckles yeah you look like Freddy cougar Krueger that's what I said no no you said cougar cougar tuille rouy what what no guys we need to get this tooth out somehow oh I got an idea that isn't dangerous a I was going to say we push him out of a hot air balloon o that would awesome how would that get the tooth out when you hit the ground your tooth would fly out oh impact yeah guys come up with something better o Joseph see that weight over there grab it okay oh you're going to like this one Cody it's going to work okay so we tie a string around this weight and then we throw it off a balcony and then the String's attached to your tooth and then the weight from the weight pulls the tooth out your mouth now now that that could work okay let's do that okay Cody I'm going to drop this weight off the balcony and the force of it should pull your tooth out okay okay all right here we go yeah Cody did the tooth come out no I think I broke my nose dang it dude this tooth is persistent you want to try the weight one more time Cody no well I have no more ideas then o I think I have an idea dude follow me oh come on Cody I don't think I want to come on okay Joseph what's your plan I hired a professional boxer to knock his teeth out I mean tooth out wait which is it teeth or tooth tomato tomato no no it's not the same thing one is more than the other yeah I think You' mean tomato Tomatoes o I see what you're saying yes exactly but I just want the Tomato okay you can eat after we fix your cavity no I mean the tooth has a cavity in it we're going to get it fixed just punch me okay uh where's the boxer at uh he's here right now oh what Su I want to get his teeth KN out oh he's right here so Cody open your mouth you see that tooth with the cavity in it we want you to knock that tooth out okay I've knocked plenty of teeth out this one going to be a problem all right Cody stand real still all right punch him oh I connected that one I connected that one Cody you okay he did it he knocked my tooth out wait why is there two junior did he get it uh he didn't knock out the tooth with the cavity what that means he knocked out my two good teeth they're obviously not that good if they came out that easily yeah they're all so yellow I wouldn't say they're good teeth I think that cavity is making your tooth stronger this is stupid just hit me again okay did he get it uh hit him again oh how about now it's still in there hit him again okay he has to have gotten it right uh do it again one more time I'm starting to enjoy this Joseph oh me too dude do it again hit him as hard as you can all right it still didn't work I can hit him again no just leave all right actually actually actually one more time all right that tooth is still in there dude I think that tooth made a steel or something yeah I just Cody I don't know what to do I think I should just tell my parents I have a cavity what you want to live in Europe I guess he really wants to eat those frog legs dude yeah whatever they eat there we have frog legs here you just want to see the pyramids what that's in Egypt the Great Walls yeah CH all right listen um I have an idea I have some old leftover fireworks from the 4th of July I just tie a string around your tooth and on a rocket why because it'll burn my face a rocket won't burn your face a rocket is really fast so if I tie it to a rocket a rocket will shoot up in the air and take your tooth to space they're called fireworks the fire will burn my face fireworks are really fast Joseph yeah they're really really fast like the speed of light you won't even feel it dude yeah it's so fast okay you know what yeah let's do it all right let's go come on okay Cody I tied a string around this rocket and around your tooth so when I light the Rock it's going to fly in the air and pull your tooth out you know now that I'm actually looking at it I don't think I want to do this anymore come on Cody the worst thing that could happen is that the tooth does not come out and the rocket takes you into space and you go see Jupiter I'd rather see Uranus like seriously can we go to your room come on Cody you got to do the rocket I don't know guys I'm scared don't [ __ ] out now yeah you have big balls Cody I know you do I mean I have pretty average sized balls oh come on are you going to do it or not okay okay let me light Joseph back up okay dude okay Joseph I lit it dude this is going to be so cool he might die I know whoa I don't think he went to space dude oh let's go inside so dude now that Cody's dead who's going to be our third friend I guess Jeffy what Cody you're still alive damn you still kicking bro yeah you were supposed to kill the S not join them yeah you're supposed to bring balance to the force not leave it in darkness I hate you I hate you let me see your tooth Cody it's still there not even the firework pulled it up I almost died but what did you see did you see space I didn't see anything my face was on fire guys I think I'm just going to give up well no you can't give up you have to go to Europe Cody I'm here to pick you up oh my God Cody what happened to you uh he he fell in the oven and it burned him up and then it accidentally burned a cavity into his tooth oh no Cody it's a good thing you didn't get that cavity from not brushing or else you'd have to go live in Europe no he didn't get it from not brushing he got it cuz the oven burnt it into his tooth yep come on Cody let's go back home we're going to sue the oven company so Mommy can get paid okay what's wrong Joseph we're just such good friends dude I know I wish we had friends like us oh we're such good friends we're so rare So guys what do you want to do today dude dude dude we got to do the one chip challenge the what the one chip challenge there's this one chip that's super hot but once you eat it you're going to spit it back up it's so intense you might cry you might sweat or even throw up dude it's that hot bro it's that hot we should all try it I got three of them we're going to try them today well Cody are you going to try it guys it's a potato chip it's not that hot well I want to see you try it then okay let's see what the pamphlet says it says if you can last 1 minute you're powerless 10 minutes you're Power full 30 minutes you're supercharged in 1 hour you're Invincible dude you're not going to last 10 seconds guys this is a kids game I'm a man I can handle a potato chip then eat it Cody yeah okay fine I will let's take a look at this stupid thing doesn't look that hot ow is it hot Cody mm- wait it's not hot at all mm no way maybe it's expired it got to be expired come on I want to try I want to try I'll open this one up dude yeah if it's not that hot I want to try it are you sure it's not hot Cody no it's not hot at all Cody why is your face red oh I I'm just embarrassed for the chip company cuz they think it's hot but it's not dude you're shirtless yeah I just want to show you how strong I am and how weak that chip is wait the chip wasn't hot at all no that chips for [ __ ] so you can eat two of them huh I could but I'm not hungry right now oh eat two eat two that be come on dude you can do it might as well yeah yeah do it dude is it hot come on it has to be hot it's the one chip challenge you ate too M Cody's truly a man he's not a man he can't be you know you know what be really cool if he could eat three dude he would be a Savage Oh open up open let's try eat three open it up okay Cody are you Cody what happened to your hair oh I I shaved it to show you how much of a badass I am it it didn't fall off or anything wait wait why are your eyes red oh I'm just so mad that that chip wasn't as hot as I wanted it to be oh can you eat three cuz if you could eat three you're truly a badass yeah dude yeah okay I could do this all day yeah go ahead dude I want to see it why is your tongue black oh I guess my tongue died because of how hot the chip wasn't I eat it then dude I eat it Savage Savage Savage Savage wao dang dude you really ate three chips wow you finally get my respect now bro well boys your friend Cody's lucky to be alive but I got to ask what happened did he try to eat like 1,000 bees no he ate three of the one chip challenges what three what is he crazy no he's a Savage he only supposed to eat one and even then that one is dangerous and he ate three like it was nothing what a badass so like is he going to die see that's the thing he has third degree burns all over his body his tongue is medically dead and his stomach melted his stomach melted yeah so we're going to have to do a stomach transplant well go in the back and get a stomach well this isn't Best Buy I don't just have a closet full of stomachs back there we're going to need a stomach donor we find a stomach donor well see that's the problem with stomachs see people need stomachs to live so if we take a stomach from one person they're going to need a stomach and then we're going to have to take another stomach from someone else for them and then it just goes on and on with people trading stomachs so how are we going to find a stomach well we're going to have to wait till we find somebody who's dead or dying and take their stomach well why don't we just go to a nursing home and grab an old person and take their stomach well then he'd have the stomach of like an 80-year-old man and then he would only be able to eat like Jello-O and tapioca and stuff so he need a stomach from someone our age yeah and that's pretty tough because people your age don't usually die unless it's an accident wait a minute so what if one of our friends that we don't really care about just so happens to die today we can bring them to you and you'll take the stomach um if somebody your age were to just happen to die I could use their stomach yes Joseph what's up we should totally kill one of our friends we don't care about and bring them the body so we get the stomach oh dude I've been waiting on this let's do it yeah we're going to do that okay I didn't hear any of that okay so we're going to bring you a stomach of someone our AG wait wait wait just bring me the body and I will handle the stomach all right come on Joseph let's go kill someone yeah let's kill my friend I didn't hear that either all right Joseph let's name off some friends that we really don't care about ooh I can name a few like Patrick that kid from class oh yeah Patrick he thinks everything's crazy when it's not so let's use his stomach but but dude how are we going to kill him uh oh I know we can we can put one of my toys on the roof and ask him to go get it and then we lock him on the roof and the only way he can get down is jump off and that's how he di You Evil Genius you so I bet he's outside let's go get him yeah let's get him uh hey Patrick hey guys look at my Spider-Man bouncy sure is bouncy yeahhuh uh Patrick we need your help I lost one of my toys I need you to get it for me okay yeah we need you to use your Spider-Man Powers okay I help come on see Patrick right there there's my paddle ball right there why is it on the roof uh I got frustrated cuz I couldn't do it and it was making me mad so I threw it on the Roof oh that makes sense can you go get it for me okay this is crazy Joseph close the window close the window I got you dude why' they close the window I going to get the paddle ball wait this is fun so now what dude well um eventually he's going to get hungry and he's going to want to get off the roof and we locked the window so the only way for him to get off the roof is he has to jump and jumping off the roof will'll kill him okay okay so when is that going to happen uh well he's having a lot of fun with that paddle ball so okay maybe we should go try to kill someone else in case he doesn't jump ooo sounds like fun all right Joseph let's think of someone else in case Patrick doesn't jump off the roof o how about that bully kid from class that's always bullying us oh yeah the bully he's always making fun of us wa why don't we think of him first we don't care about him right okay so so how about this we go get the bully to come over to my house we tell him we want to go swimming and we say we're stronger swimmers than him oh that'll make him mad dude and the only way he's a stronger swimmer than us is if he can swim with this wait tied to his ankle and then he'll drown and then we'll use his stomach and we can let Patrick off the roof o that's a genius plan we take a life and Save a Life yes so let's go get the bully yeah let's get his bully nerd give me your lunch money I don't have any money I know you do hey bully what do you nerds want give me your lunch money uh we were going to invite you to swim in my pool why would you invite me you guys hate me uh but you're our best friend yeah and wouldn't you like to swim in a nice cool pool you look stressed yeah that sounds kind of fun actually yeah so come swim in my pool with us okay all right let's swim in the pool yeah wow I never thought you guys would let me swim with you that's really nice thank you you don't know how to swim [ __ ] what yeah you suck at swimming you going to drown I can swim someone who another swim say what you swim I can swim if you're so good at swimming that I bet you can't swim with this weight tied around your ankle well I bet I can okay let's tie on your ankle then come on okay are you sure you can swim with this weight tied your ankle yeah I'm a really strong swimmer how you going to swim to the bottom all right jph throw the weight in there look at him drown dude he can't breathe we're about to get a stomach oh yeah stomach us up dude all right Patrick you come down now hey guys you kind of left me on the roof up here yeah sorry about that but we don't need you anymore so you can jump off now okay hey can I jump in your pool from here uh jump into the pool uh yeah you should be able to make it another P from right there okay he crazy wa what Patrick what' you do yeah dude he's supposed to be drowning guys the craziest thing just happened I jumped off the roof and I saw this guy drowning and I saved his life what we were trying to kill you guys yeah you ruined what I'm out of here W Patrick you ruin everything you want me to get back on the roof yeah get back on the roof hurry up Joseph I'm so frustrated I know we had him dude he was drowning I know and then Patrick had to save his life but at least Patrick's back on the roof but he can keep jumping in the pool dude okay how about we drain the pool so when he jumps in the pool he dies but it's going to take hours to drain the pool okay how about while the pool drains we get another person to come over and we get their stomach like who dude oh we can call it Penelope but don't you have a crush on her but she's a girl and all girls are the same it's not I'm going to miss her you're right dude juice world was right yeah all girls are the same so I'll call penel and just ask her for her stomach wait why would she give you her stomach though because girls want to be skinny and if she gives us her stomach she'll be skinny oh yeah she would totally be skinny okay yeah cuz she won't eat anymore so let me call Penelope what do you want junior well there's something I need from you ooh I like how this starts off dude okay well what do you need well the thing I need is inside of you oh no I'm out of here no no no I promise I promise I'm not being gross I'm not listen the thing I need is where babies come from oh my God I'm leaving I'm talking about your stomach I'm talking about your stomach what babies don't come from your stomach Junior yes they do that's why women's stomach get big when they're pregnant comes from your stomach I don't have time to explain Anatomy to you okay listen we need your stomach it's an emergency well why because Cody needs a stomach transplant or he's going to die no Junior if I give you my stomach I'll die well listen listen baby listen talk to me talk to me baby listen don't you want to be skinny if you give me your stomach you're not going to eat anymore and you'll actually be skinny yeah you look pretty fat over there Penelope you look like a chunky monkey excuse me you're gaining a few pounds listen you're pretty big you're bigger than me so listen if you give me your stomach you'll lose weight cuz you won't eat and then you'll be like a supermodel paper thin yeah guys will actually like you you know what I'm fine with the way I look Junior okay you can lie to yourself but not me listen you get you get skinny but we we can fix your face later with plastic surgery but listen you give me your stomach you'll be really skinny I promise oh my God you are so rude Junior I'm leaving no no no no okay back up plan grab a hammer and knock her out okay I got you uh stomach schach how about we make out baby no where's she at she left a dude ready she's comfortable in her own skin oh what's wrong with these women these days it's like they can't be manipulated I know she has a self-esteem or something I wish a stomach would just fall into our laps who who's at the door oh no hello hey uh you mind if I hide out here for a while the police are looking for me what' you do oh nothing serious I uh stole a video game well that's dumb video game should be free yeah yeah yeah that's that's what I said yeah so you can come inside yeah you look cool dude okay so what's your name uh Purple People Eater Purple People Eater yeah but you can call me Greg all right Greg what do you want to do I'm hungry what the news is on I wouldn't watch that breaking news the normal news anchor is on a cruise so filling in is me Steve stalberger so breaking news an escaped convict known as The Purple People Eater known for eating his his victims after they've decomposed and turned purple has escaped from prison keep an eye out for him he's very dangerous awkward uh Greg can you give us a second okay uh Joseph there's a serial killer right next to us you know what that means we need to run no no no no grab the hammer and kill him we can take his stomach no one's going to miss a serial killer oh you're right dude I'll get the hammer all right hey Greg so we don't care what we just saw on the news I mean we know you're a good guy yeah I only stole a video game I got the hammer dude wait what's the hammer for uh we're going to make a Tik Tok to that song Hammer Time D I love that song yeah so go go go well kid your friends never came back I guess I'm just going to have to pull the plug doctor doctor doctor I found a guy we can take his stomach what is that purple people eater yeah we hit him with a hammer wa you know he eats people right his stomach is going to be full of human remains well you can just empty the stomach and give it to him it's still a stomach yeah I guess you're right okay I guess we can do the surgery after all yeah well guys I made a full recovery I just want to say thanks for giving me a new stomach any time get get back down here yeah Cody we wanted you to be alive so we got you a stomach there was a lot of people we tried to kill wait what yeah there was a lot of people we had to find you a new stomach and we finally got you the perfect stomach so how's it feeling well it's okay but whenever I eat food I just don't feel satisfied oh well maybe because you need to eat people what yeah that stomach belonged to a serial killer who ate people what he ate people yeah but only purple people which means after the body de compose and turn purple oh oh god I think I'm going to throw up no you're not you're stomach's used to eating stuff like that so look maybe it's just hungry cuz you're not eating people I can't eat people Junior don't worry you don't have to eat people but that's probably why you're not satisfied yeah yeah you're right you're right I don't I don't have to all right baby are you ready to watch TV yeah Marvin I'm excited to watch Shark Tank ooh mips I got use some SpaghettiOs I never asked for SpaghettiOs douge but you look so really all that be all that hungry I don't look hungry yes you do here look at least read it but read it what could you have possibly spelled with SpaghettiOs they're all O's Morphin please Call of Duty Morphin please give me a new Call of Duty please I'm not getting you the new Call of Duty douge also these aren't SpaghettiOs these are alphabet letters the the SpaghettiOs only have O's oh yeah and also my name's not Marin it's Marvin I want a muffin I didn't say muffin look also also also I'm not getting you the new Call of Duty you can buy it yourself but I needs it and I ain't got no job oh you ain't got a job well I got I got an idea all right douge I got this I thought you was going to go get your wallet why would I go get my wallet to give me $60 so I can get the game I'm not getting you new Call of Duty douge I got a soup see I told you you was hungry I'm not hungry look read it do you get it see I can't read but why the [ __ ] were you staring at it so long if you can't read you just told me you couldn't read cuz it look good if you can't read then how would you spell marant please Call of Duty cuz I pay someone $5 to do it if you paid someone $5 to do it you could use that $5 to go towards the game well see it was an Investments see I paid $5 so hopefully get a $60 game all right listen it says get a job well why' you put in the soup you could have just told me ABS you could have just told me to get your new callor of Duty but then you would have said no I did say no what listen me and Rose are going to watch the new Shark Tank Episode and you're going to watch it with us well see I don't understand why you going to sit around watch a bunch of fish and swim around and tank and stuff when you can just give me $6 I get a game look watch this show it might inspire you to make some money four sharks who are all billionaires are looking to invest their money into the next million dooll product hello sharks my name is johathan and I live in my M's basement so sucks how many of you have went to go watched anime on your laptop and then all of a sudden you have to blow your load of boogers so you grab your tissue and then you blow your load into it and now you start watching anime again but then 15 minutes later all of a sudden you have to blow another load of boogers so you reach in your tissue box but it's empty because your mother hasn't went to the store in 3 weeks well now what are you going to do you have to blow your load of boogers and you have no way to do it well shs I have created a solution to this worldwide problem introducing to you so come with me rag wherever I go this bad boy comes with me and it's machine washable so it's reusable so it's better for the environment than this regular tissues and this bad boy can hold so many loads of boogers so sharks who's ready to blow their load of cash with me uh I I have a question what material is it made of is it soft because I have kind of a sensitive nose oh I have a sensitive nose too so I made sure to make this out of the softest products this is made out of 100% pure Egyptian cotton made in India can can I feel it of course you can feel it oh thank you w wow this is soft uh yeah ah you know I actually have to sneeze you might if I blow my load of boogers into this sure blow all the loads of boogers you need that did feel good on my nose but it's kind of a weird smell smells kind of salty oh that's because I had to use it on the way here had to blow a quick load of boogers into it ew I have a question how many loads of boogers can you blow into it I would say five loads of boogers first you want to work the corners then you want to work your way towards the middle does it come in any different colors it only comes in white so you don't see the booger St I don't understand the product it looks like any towel I would find at a store shut up lady this product's not meant for you well I'd like to make an offer I'll give you $200 for it sold sucker this is like a regular washcloth from Target no taky Backes now pay up I knew it well deal is a deal give me that bad boy yo mips they just gave that man $200 for a washcloth well usually you're supposed to invent something and then the Sharks will invest their money into it so if I go on the show they going to give me $60 for the new Callas no they're not going to give you money for Call of Duty but if you invent something and they like it they'll invest their money and then you can make money for Call of Duty oh okay I got me as an ideas keep watching the show I'll be right back the sharks are ready to hear the the next invention hello sharks my name is eat your boy dougy and my invention is to give me money box so what you do is you put money in the box and then I has it so who wants to invest I'm out yeah I'm out I'm out no hold on I have a question when I put my money in the box where does the money go it goes in the box and then I T it out and then I have it okay but how do I make money well you ain't going to make money you just going to make me Happ happy because now I get the game the game the brand new Call of Duty I needs it yeah I'm out what you mean you out you out some money I know you ain't out some money cuz I know you rich I know you can afford to give me $60 leave okay I'll take my money back somewhere else Marvin the mean sharks on TV was mean they said no to my invention and I know it's a good idea because I'm like Thomas Edon it's not a good idea douge it's just a box that says give me money on it well does anyone else want inaps no what's it I was on TV I'm famous so I'll only charge you $60 for my autograph I don't want an autograph douge if you want $60 that bad go get a job oo Marvin the fairs in town can we go no all the rides make me nauseous well we don't have to ride rides we can just play games and win prizes but the games are scams last time I lost $100 mips did you say scam and $100 so all I got to do is set up a game and people will give me $100 no the games at the fair scams and they charge you a lot of money to win cheap prizes so I wouldn't suggest doing that oh thanks for the idea muffin man you can have my box dou come on come on to dou dunker rooo oh I want to play the game yeah me too all right well let me tell you how to play first you pay me $10 and then you get two shots if one of your shots makes it one of these holes whatever the number next to the hole is is how much money you got to pay me so if it goes into 10 hole you got to pay me $10 if it goes in 50 hole got to pay me $50 wait so we have to pay to play and then we have to pay again if we win yeah well then why would we even play cuz it's really fun look I even give you two free shots go ahead oh a free shot I'll go first oh I almost made it okay oh I got 10 all right now you owe me $10 wait you said it was free to play well it was free to shoot the shot but if it goes in the hole you owe me $10 what this is ridiculous I'm not paying come on Junior wait I'm going to call a popo you stealing from me hey there somebody call the cops about a robbery I did Mr police officer man because some kid don't stole $10 from me okay where'd he go he went that way wearing glasses in a shirt so he just ran up and stole your money well no what I have is a game called Doug is dunkaroo and what you do is you pay me $10 and I give you two shots and if one of your balls goes in one of the holes whatever the number next to it is how much money you got to pay me what a kid made it in a $10 hole and he ain't give me no $10 well I can't say I blame him I mean this kind of sounds like [ __ ] well what I did was is I gave him two free shots and so he made one of them in $10 and he ain't pay me now this kind of sounds like you're trying to scam people well the fair does it well yeah but that's the fair this is somebody's house what dougy what are you doing welcome to is dunkaroo what you do is you pay me $10 no no no no he's trying to scam people out of the money dou I told you not to do that why a I mean to do you told me the fair didn't that you got scammed out of $100 at the fair I think you two should probably just get out of here come on DG let's go I want to play this by myself oh damn it oh douge I cannot believe you tried scamming people but you told me I could do it because the F done did it to you no I never said you could do it Marvin keep it down I'm trying to read my book well I got an idea of how you can make money douge you could try writing a book cuz the Harry Potter books have made billions of dollars but Marvin he said earlier he can't read yeah mips you just be trying to make fun of my disabilities no I'm just trying to help you make money so you can get your stupid game cuz writing a book would make you a lot of money H I guess I could try writing a boooks hey can I borrow you boobs oh yeah I think you'll like it it's about a boy named Harry Potter and he cast spells what type of smells no he cast spells he's a wizard okay I think I know what I'm going to R about I can't believe you gave douge your book Marvin I think it's nice your friend is trying to read all right Marvin I wrote my books Harry poter and the unknown smell dou get that out of here I'm go ahead and ruin andon for you the unknown smell was his Harry poter douge that was very inappropriate you didn't write that book all you did was tape a picture to the front of her book you ruined my Harry Potter book well I'm just trying to get some money for the game listen douge if you're this desperate for money why don't you donate a kidney well what's a kidney well look it's something in your body you have two of them and you can donate one for money well how they going to get it out they're going to do surgery and cut it out well that's going to hurt yeah it's going to hurt but it'll make you money ooh money I got me an idea all my BBS I got my kidney what douge that's not your kidney yes it is no that's made out of Play-Doh no it's not I see the container right there don't tell nobody I'm not going to tell anyone douge but no one's going to fall for this no one's going to think this is your kidney hey there somebody call a doctor you call a doctor yeah cuz I got to get the money for the game yeah Mr doctor man I want to sell my kidney for $60 but but okay hold on I have a number of questions first of all how did you even get your kidney out I pooped it out you just you pooped it out yeah I was sitting on the toilet and I was so really constipated and then after I went boo boo I got up and I looked down I said there go my kidney so here go my kidney I didn't even know it was possible to poop your kidney out how long has it been out because it only stays good for a few hours if it's not on Ice oh about four or five minutes okay and you only want to sell it for $60 yeah well how much can I get for it I mean kidneys usually go for thousands okay well then that no no no you said $60 oh well plus taxes and fees taxes and fees on what the new the new Call of Duty game wait wait so you want the new Call of Duty for your kidney yeah so if I go get you Call of Duty you will give me your kidney yeah that's a deal I mean that seems like a good deal for me I mean we actually do have a patient who needs a kidney uh okay I'll be right back with Call of Duty you you can't let him take this kid you got to tell them the truth there's someone that actually needs it well I really need to get he okay I'm back with the new Call of Duty oh oh I just got a new Call of Duties yeah I just have to get this kidney back to the little 8-year-old boy who really needs it that's I got to tell you sorry I'm in a hurry hey you just saved a life no no I got to tell you something tell you that 8-year-old boy going to die CU of you oh that's [ __ ] up but at least I got a new Call of Duties I just got a new Call of Duty I just got a new Call of Duty I just got a new Call of Duty so now I'm going to play it ducky that kid is going to die cuz you gave him a fake kidney why that kid already has two knees anyway way how many more knees does he need what well I'm just going to play the game so hold on hey no right now man I'm playing the game what's wrong doctor well I got all the way back to the hospital and I told that little boy and his family congratulations you're going to live I found a new kidney for you so they all celebrated and cried and then when I went to go put the kidney in I realized it was Playdoh and I ate it because ploh smells delicious so now my stomach hurts and that little boy's mad at me cuz he thinks I ate his kidney and it's all his fault and he owes me $60 because I bought Call of Duty well I got an idea I can pay you back come on welcome to Doug is dungaroo no no no I don't want to play this game it's a scam well this time the rules is different for every hole that you make that's how much money I pay you okay yeah I like that but you got to do it with this ball okay um damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it damn it this game is hard damn it damn it damn it godamn o man I love me some KFC chicken F it's so good it made me want to slap my mama hey Black Yoshi I'm about to watch TV but Mario I was about to play thebox what I was about to play thebox the Xbox yeah well you can play the Xbox later I want to watch TV Mario you so green for that breaking news M papy has released a new chicken sandwich that's selling out all across America we have Brooklyn tea guy on the scene to tell us what all the fuss is about Brooklyn hello I'm standing outside Popeyes where people are going BB Bok for their new chicken sandwich now they're sold out right now but I'm standing here with Jamal who was lucky enough to get one of those chicken sandwiches before it's sold out tell us Jamal how is it oh it good well you heard it here first folks it good now Jamal I I noticed you don't have a shirt now why is that oh I can't afford a shirt I spent all my money on chicken oh well uh hey hey we rolling we getting this uh how about I give you my shirt off my back oh really thanks man I deserve it don't it yeah yeah yeah okay uh just just make sure you get this okay okay thanks so much yeah there you go kid now smile all right I just gave this poor little boy the shirt right off my back what a nice thing for me to do huh wow thanks Mister yeah back to you Goodman I I look good right I look good yeah now give me back my shirt oh what wow people are really going crazy over a chicken sandwich you see that black Yoshi Black Yoshi breaking news Mario please give me the new poopus chicken sandwich please black Yoshi get off the TV well Mario I really want the poopus chicken sandwich poopus yeah you mean Popeyes yeah poopy's the chicken sandwich well black y you're not going to get poo eyeses you already have KFC but Mario this KFC old and stale and it been sitting out it's only been sitting out for 2 minutes but Mario I still don't want this I want the poo poo what yeah the poo poo sandwich okay if you want a poo poo sandwich go to the bathroom M you know what I be talking about you know I want the poop but black you're not even trying now it's called Popeyes and you're not getting it because you already have KFC but M I just really really really really really be W to poop p Black Yoshi you did you hear the news they're all sold out of sandwiches they don't have any well maybe they got some in the bag okay well then how about you go there and see if they have any in the back all right Mar but real quick you got $5 no I don't got $5 Mar I know you'll be having a $5 okay black here your fine look here take the $5 and and if they have a chicken sandwich just buy it m you better than Abraham Lincoln La chicken love that chicken from papes what you want baby oh yeah can I get that poo poo chicken sandwich honey we all out what you guys got any in the Bag N baby this no in the back Hi D hey Daddy can I go swim in the toilet did you do your chores no then what's the answer um a no D Jeffy it's not multiple choice oh the answer is no you cannot go swim in the toilet until you do your chores well this is stupid daddy I don't want to do my chores well Jeffy go do your chores and then you can go have fun fine Daddy daddy daddy the vacuum's not sucking so it's definitely not your mom oh Jeffy what are you talking about oh Jeffy the vacuum cleaner is not even plugged in your mom's not even plugged in oh all right Jeffy now you're grounded after you do your chores well Daddy you want to know what I think about your vacuum cleaner what no Jeffy Jeff Jeffy you better not drop that vacuum cleaner opper day man I can't believe poopy ain't have the chicken sandwich Jimmy you hit Black Yoshi on the head whoop all right doctor what's going on well he's in a coma cuz he took a vacuum cleaner to the Dome I'm talking well is he going to be okay uh what do you mean uh I mean I don't know he could be in a coma for days or even years years yeah there nothing you can do well I got him on a chicken IV drip but it doesn't seem to be doing anything but it's what he would have wanted so there's nothing else you can do well some people think that people in a coma can still hear us so maybe we should just try telling them to wake up hey hey you wake up wakey wakey wake up yeah he's not waking up okay so that that's it you're not going to do anything else well if you brought him something he really really wanted that might bring him out of the coma bring him something he really wanted yeah like what does he really really want I mean he wanted a Popeye's chicken sandwich but I don't see how that would help wait look look his heart rate spent up when you mentioned popey's chicken sandwiches wait that's his heart rate yeah yeah he must really really want a popey chicken sandwich okay well I mean they're sold out how am I going to get them one well you better go find one okay black Yos I I I'll try to find one okay I got him one what is this it's a Popeye's chicken sandwich no it's not okay look it's a KFC chicken sandwich but he can't tell the difference oh my God he's flatlined wait what you get this garbage chicken sandwich out of here what am I supposed to do get Popeyes what are you trying to kill the man it's just KFC he likes KFC no you go get Popeyes he needs Popeyes it's sold out okay go go get it don't you die on me come here oh man where am I going to get a popey's chicken sandwich from oh donkey that popey's chicken sandwich was so good oh Shrek where did you just get un eating a popey's chicken sandwich dokey where did you get it from I got it from popey's and I waited in line all day and I really had the crap donkey but it was worth it because the sandwich was so good what St I need a popey chicken sandwich well donkey if you wait about 30 minutes there'll be one Flo putting in the toilet for you that's that's gross trick why would I do that oh okay hold on you might not have to wait donkey get a l of that donkey that's what a spicy Popeye's Chicken Sandwich smells like that's gross Shrek oh donkey it's crusting away right in my pants donkey oh and it's kind of creamy too whatever Shrek hey you get the Popeye sandwich no all the Popeyes are sold out and I can't find anybody who has one no well it looks like your frch just going to have to stay in a coma no I'm going to get him out of this coma why do you need him out of the coma so bad because I feel like it's my fault he's in a coma because Jeffy hit him in the head with a vacuum okay well it really sounds like it's jeffy's fault no no no no if I didn't tell Jeffy to do his chores he wouldn't have thrown the vacuum okay it sounds like a bit of a stretch but I'm not going to tell you how to feel look do you know anywhere I can get a Popeye's Chicken Sandwich tonight well all the Popeyes are closed it's late you just have to wait till tomorrow I'm not going to do this tomorrow I'm going to do it tonight what are you busy tomorrow is your tomorrow so busy you don't have time to go to Popeyes well no I just want to get this done tonight because I just I just can't stop thinking about it look look look there has to be a way to get a Popeye's Chicken Sandwich tonight like eBay what eBay yeah I can buy one on eBay and get it shipped here you're going to buy an eBay chicken sandwich yeah hold on let me get my laptop all right let's find us a chicken sandwich oh look there's one $55,000 for a chicken sandwich well well this one's spicy oh okay that's why it's so expensive it takes a week to get here a week what are they going to mail you an envelope with a chicken sandwich in it and it takes a week to get here it's going to be all moldy by the time it arrives I really need this can I borrow $5,000 oh yeah sure let me go get my wallet no obviously not well but it's going to save his life look I really don't care that much look I really need a popey's chicken sandwich okay look I I know a guy who's good at getting things that aren't getable what yeah just just go outside and stand under a Street Lamp which which which one it it doesn't matter he'll find you okay uh wait wait wait uh uh bring $5 $5 yeah all right actually actually bring a 100 $100 $100 yeah he he needs $100 okay where's this guy at what hey you get the $100 yeah what sucker he hey hey hey you yeah you come here uh who are you I heard you were looking for a Popeye Chicken Sandwich yeah I'm looking for a popey chicken sandwich do you have one sh be quiet people are listening oh do you have one all right I know where you can get a Popeye chicken sandwich but it won't be easy well how are you going to get me a Popeye chicken sandwich it's midnight all the Popeyes are closed well I saw a guy buy one earlier and I followed him home and I know he hasn't eaten it yet he's keeping it in his microwave all right how would we get it all right we're going to break into his house and we're going to steal that sandwich so you can give it to your friend break into his house that's illegal well we're doing it okay well what do you want out of it uh $100 $100 I just gave the other guy $100 for no reason yeah I saw that you got biffed okay fine I'll give you $100 after we get the sandwich all right deal but we should probably get walking it's a pretty long walk well I have a car we can just drive no no it draws too much attention we got to walk come on all right this is the house oh man that was a long walk yeah we're going to have to walk all the way back too okay so what's the plan all right we're going to go up to the door and we're going to knock on it and then when he answers we're going to ask him really really nicely for the chicken sandwich he's not going to give it to us well you never know till we try okay fine let's ask oh man I sure hope this works I'm really nervous dang who is that at the door don't they know it's midnight hello uh hello there my chocolate friend my chocolate friend I'm sorry I I was nervous and I just I I choked yeah obviously okay let's try this again look what do y'all want are y'all gingerbread Witnesses look I don't want any cookies okay no no no no no sir I'm sorry about my friend here he he doesn't get out much oh I can see look we know you have a popey chicken sandwich in your microwave and we want it how do you know I got a chicken sandwich in my microwave you wa for the government no no no we homie dog home slice of pie stop just stop no don't we we cool no this is embarrassing uh okay look c c can we just please have the chicken sandwich no I'm not giving you my chicken sandwich I waited in that popey's line for 3 hours so you think I'm just going to hand my chicken sandwich some to some entitled white man no no away so have a good day sir my slice of pie oh look look look I was nervous look look what are we going to do I need that chicken sandwich all right I'm going to call my friend Chester the chicken what Chester the chicken all right Mario this is my friend Chester the chicken he I am Chester chicken how may I be of assist well hello Mr Chester dog homie friend no no stop let me do the talking this time uh sorry Chester I hope he didn't bother you h no problem I wish just at home chucking myself you get it he Chu chicken yeah I know yeah yeah yeah I get it I get it uh look Chester we need your help stealing a chicken sandwich oh you call on Chester chicken to steal crispy body of one of my own kind you spit on me like yeah look uh Chester can you help us or not uh what's in it for Chester chicken um well give you 50 bucks H 50 bucks for Chester chicken yeah H you got your a deal okay uh I need you to distract the owner of the house while we steal the sandwich all right seems simple enough I do it look I told y'all to get off my properties b b is that a chicken oh my God it's a chicken at my door I'mma cook it and eat it come here chicken come here all right he left the door open let's go inside get that sandwich there it is in all its Glory all right grab it and let's go all right all right I got got one I got a popey chicken sandwich yeah now that's a chicken sandwich how'd you get it I had to break into a guy's house to get it oh well I'm actually a cop so I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that well let's see if it wakes Black Yoshi up Black Yoshi look what I got a popey's chicken sandwich oh is that a poopy chicken sandwich it is oh this is so good oh it smells so good Mario wow that coma Went Away really quick yeah black Yosh that coma went away a little too quick I know the poo poo don't my coma are you sure you weren't faking your coma Black Yoshi no Mario my head was hurting really really so bad and then the chicken sandwich just saved me I'm going to go eat my chicken sandwich well thanks for nothing doctor no thank you I'm just standing outside holding my purse with lots of money in it give me your purse help help help what's the matter ma'am that man just ran off with my purse well that way Simmons let's get him all right no Simmons Simmons no sorry about that get him Simmons get him ooh a penny oh look at that it's face up too that means it's good luck oh yeah I should make a wish huh what should I wish for oh I know a lifetime supply of Lucky Charms marshmallows yeah I can fill my bathtub with them Wait no that's stupid oh oh I know I know I wish the Buccaneers would go to the Super Bowl yeah that's it all right let's pick this thing up oh I got you oh you got me oh I sure did I got you am I going to jail you sure are cuz I got you oh man hey hey Simmons check this out oh what's that mate found a Patty on the ground oh sweet oh you got the guy I sure did I got him oh that's great good job Simmons all right let's get this purse back to the lady all right all right ma'am I got your purse back oh thank you officer for returning my purse to me I'm so grateful hey B you hear that I think she's hitting on me I'm going to turn her into a peanut &em I'll make sure to tell my husband you boy saved me wait a minute you're the chief's wife I am oh Simmons we might be getting a big raise cuz of this and it's all thanks to this Lucky Penny hey he bad guy yeah tell the lady you're sorry for stealing a purse I don't want to say I'm sorry say it or you're going to jail I'm sorry what was that I'm sorry that's better now you get out of here even though you're still wearing those handcuffs just just figure that out let's go boys I'll tell my husband how you boys saved my purse my wife told me what you did and I'm real proud of you Simmons thank you so much sir yeah I I was there too sir I I I found this penny you showed incredible bravery when you tackled that guy who stole my wife's purse thank you sir well I I I showed bravery too you know I chased them until I saw the penny so Simmons I want to give you a huge raise for what you did for my wife a raise thank you sir but but what about me sir I mean I helped oh well guy I'm going to have to cut your pay to be able to afford Simmons new rays but cut my pay but I did as much as he did well did you tackle the B guy no did you get my wife's purse back well no but well tell me guy who did those things Simmons exactly guy next time show a little more hustle and stop focusing so much on pennies sorry mate don't talk to me hey Daddy can you help me open up my Reese's pces your what my Reese's pces Jeffy it's Reese's Pieces no Mario I think it's called Reese's pces Reese's pces no no no you had the Reese's part right it's Reese's Pieces Reese's Pieces reeces Pisces reees Pisces what no guys shut up it's Reese's Pieces Reese's Pieces JY take your candy to your room and go eat it in there cuz I I don't want to deal with this anymore make me mad who's at the door hold on let me answer it uh hello hey buddy oh God hey what are you what are you doing I'm just at my house that's cool hey can can I come in so I so I can complain what did did you drive here yeahhuh yeah I I am sorry about your mailbox by the way what did you do to my mailbox oh it was like in the middle of the driveway so I hit it it was not in the middle of my driveway yeah do you you don't you don't check your mail because there's like a ton of mail in the road now because you hit my mailbox that wasn't in the road so you want to come inside my house mhm yeah hold let me just finish this up oh a where drinky go got another dead soldier here all right let's go wow all right buddy what's going on Mario what's wrong I I I I don't know yet buddy yeah what's wrong what you you got to stop crying okay wait I got I got to do something hold on oh okay I think I'm done oh [Music] boy okay that was disgusting oh you heard that yes oh I'm sorry I thought it was going to be silent that was not that was not silent all right I turn a fan on so you can stop doing that oh man do you smell that yes yeah sorry I get a little gassy when I'm drunk a little MH so what are you doing here I I I got I got a question to ask you and I need you to be honest okay am I a good policeman yeah [Music] buddy what what what's wrong my boss gave my P what my boss gave my pay to Simmons your boss gave your pay to Simmons who's Simmons he's my partner why did your boss give your pay to your partner because he saved my boss's purse and then I found a penny but pennies are supposed to be good luck that's what I said that that is exactly what I told him my boss my boss is a dor well well then well why don't you just do something to impress your boss oh okay he's not impressed by pennies right so like what what well well okay what you could do is we could fake a crime and then you could save that crime and then you'll be a hero Mario that's dishonest no no no no hold up hold up I think I think you H something there hold on let me go take my eyelids off what all right I'm good what you're good yeah I peeled off my eyelids so I'm fine now you peeled off your eyelids yeah see that's how you can tell what emotion I'm feeling is if I have eyelids and not cuz I don't have eyebrows so what was that plan you had oh okay so we fake a really big crime you save the day and then you'll get the raise yeah yeah I like that that sounds good no that sounds dangerous nobody asked you don't you have like laundry or something to do what's that supposed to mean well I mean you're always wearing the same clothes so maybe if you did laundry every now and then you wouldn't stink so much am I right up top come on Mario if you give him a high five I will never talk to you again down low yeah that's my man that's my boy right there stop giving me a noie okay okay so we got to think about what crime we're going to fake oh yeah you know I always wanted to try to rob an Applebees an Applebees yeah like every time I'm in there I'm like I could take all these appetizers and no one could stop me I I don't think we should do Applebees I think we should do something bigger what you mean like a Chili's no no no something big bigger than a Chili's what what like an Outback Steakhouse no oh oh no I'm not doing Red Lobster that's where I draw the line no no no no robbing crappy restaurants I'm talking robbing doing something big something huge what did your partner do that got him to raise well he uh saved my boss's wife's purse from a thief oh see that's the thing he helped your boss's wife so we have to help your boss's wife cuz cuz your boss loves his wife yeah I mean I don't love my wife so I don't really see where he's coming from well well most people love their wife okay oh [Music] God yeah you sit down sit down okay so so so so what we could do is um um we could grab your boss's wife tie her up right and then and then hold her for ransom and then you come in and save her that sounds great I love it that is not a great idea you don't love it you're going to get caught well yeah that's the whole point I'm going to catch you yeah I'm supposed to get caught cuz I'm going to be the guy dressed up well we're both going to dress up we we're going to grab her and then he's going to go train into his cop outfit and then he's going to save the day no this is not a good idea well I'll get away no one's going to get hurt it's the perfect plan all right so so that's what we're going to do so let's go get on like robber outfits but wait wait wait where can we find his wife at oh well she likes to hang out outside under like a street light and talk about her purse and how much money she has it's like her favorite thing to do okay so so we know where she's at so let's go dress up let's go grab her it's the perfect idea you're going to get this raised yes can't go wrong oh no I love just standing outside with me and my purse get it get it get it me ha you're all tied up let me go no what is this about money all right man what do we do now I'm getting kind of scared like we committed a real crime no no no don't don't be scared look yes we committed a crime but you're about to save her so none of this going to matter okay you're going to be a hero okay yeah you're right okay so what we're going to do is we're going to call your boss and tell him that we have his wife and if he doesn't give you a raise he's never going to see his wife ever again we can't do that why not then he'll know that I'm the one that kidnapped her how would he know that well because why would anyone else kidnap his wife and demand that he give me a raise how would that help anyone but me oh the phone call doesn't matter we just have to call your boss and let him know that his wife's missing cuz he doesn't know his wife's missing yeah yeah yeah you're right okay I'll go get my phone all right here's my phone all right all right now call my boss he's in my contact boss oh I found it it's ringing it's ringing hello G hey we have your wife yeah we do yeah yeah if you ever want to see your wife again well you're not going to yeah so stop wanting that cuz it's not going to happen gu what are you talking about hang up what just hang up right now hang up just hang up what what what happened you didn't block my number no what do you mean well now he knows that it's me calling because you didn't block my number how do I block your number you star 67 I I don't know how to do that oh my God what am I going to do now now he knows that I'm calling him with he doesn't know you're calling it it's ringing okay okay okay I'm I'm going to answer it I'm I'm going to apologize I'm going to explain all this uh hello gu what was that phone call about uh yeah sorry about that sir I I was having an argument with my wife and I said I never wanted to see her again and I wish somebody would take her so that's that's what that was yeah just just leave your personal problems to yourself and just focus on your work yes we'll do so you're you're absolutely right hey uh funny question by the way have you seen your wife lately well actually no not that you mention it I haven't seen her all day oh you you need to get on that yeah really really find out where she is cuz you know you don't want her messing around with like like the yellow &em or something oh she would never do that wait honey H honey where where are you okay well I'll just leave you to figure that out okay we're good I think he bought it yeah yeah I I think you're good so now all we have to do is wait for him to realize his wife is missing and then he's going to call you back and then you're going to say I'm going to find her yeah y I'll do that that's him okay okay hello go gu my wife is missing I think she's been taken oh oh oh no she's been taken oh that's that's just awful sir hey what what would you do uh if somebody were to get her back for you oh I would give whoever saved her the high highest daor the highest daor huh I I like the sound of that well I'll get right on that sir yeah yeah I'll I'll save her don't you worry all right yeah that's it we got it yeah we did it Brooklyn guy you did not just say my name in front of the hostage like my actual full name like first and last name you just said it right right she's right there she's right there she heard you well I I I was just excited for you so I said your name oh thanks a lot Mario don't say my name yeah you don't like it when I say your name do you no canot okay look look we we have to get we have to make her not think it's us yeah we have to eat her that's the only thing we can do now what yeah we have to eat her she's an memem we can do it no stop stop no no no no no no no no we we were not going to eat her what are we going to do okay follow my lead man Brooklyn guy you know don't you like that we're framing Brooklyn guy we're not really Brooklyn guy we're just going to frame him what oh yeah yeah yeah we're framing Brooklyn guy cuz I'm not I'm not actually Brooklyn guy yeah yeah you're Simmons I I am I am Simmons that's right my name is Simmons yeah you're Simmons the police officer I am office of Simmons not actually Brooklyn guy Brooklyn guy is who I'm framing yeah yeah I'm calling you Brooklyn guy because that we're trying to make it look like Brooklyn guy kidnapped her that's exactly right uh Luigi thank you for reminding me y I'm I'm Luigi I'm really Luigi but I'm trying to frame that Mario guy too yes that that is correct so you're officer Simmons officer Simmons officer Simmons that's who I am sh don't say that out loud oh yeah we don't want her to know that I'm not really Brooklyn guy okay okay I think we I think we just fixed this problem okay okay so all we have to do is just wait a few more minutes you're going to uh call your boss back and say you found her and then you take off the costume and you'll you say you found her okay yeah yeah that sounds great wait who's at the door I I don't know answer it answer it okay take your mask off first okay I'll take I'll take it off not in front of her oh hello hi therea what are you doing here have you seen a green Eminem no well your house smells like chocolate it does yeah you mind if I come in and take a look give me one second just just one second oh no who's at the door it's Simmons Simmons what is he doing here stupid try hard he's coming for my Rays I mean it's Brooklyn guy what oh oh right yeah it's Brooklyn guy oh no not Brooklyn guy yeah yeah Brooklyn guy here to save her oh man let's let's get out of here yeah yes Simmons let's get out of here yeah okay go go distract Simmons and then I'm going to change clothes and rescue her first okay yeah do that everything all right yeah everything is all right you can come and take a look so so come on come on all right I've been looking for the chief's wife everywhere I'm right here where could she be I'm right here oh man if only I could find her right behind you what's that oh there you are I found you you're going to tell them that I found you right me my name is Brooklyn guy I'm the one that found you people are always trying to frame me cuz I'm such a good cop and I'm so good-looking so just remember that my name is Brooklyn guy oh mate you found her oh hey Simmons your name is Simmons he's Simmons I'm Brooklyn guy I'm the one that found you but he's Simmons well now we got to call the chief yeah yeah let's do that all right I'm going to untie you now as long as you remember to tell them that I Brooklyn guy am the one that found you guy I'm so incredibly honored that you saved my wife from that monster Simmons I know sir I don't know why Simmons would do that I have absolutely no no idea what either one of you are talking about I didn't do anything I've taken away Simmons raise to teach him a lesson about taking other people's wives yeah he didn't really deserve it anyway I didn't do anything I don't want to hear it Simmons my wife told me that you admitted right in front of her how you plan to frame Brooklyn guy I can't believe you could possibly be so stupid wait is just about me saying I wanted to turn her into a peanut Eminem Hey sir what's my reward is it like a raise is it like big is it nice well I'm going to give you the highest honor a lifetime supply of Lucky Charms marshmallows you can fill a bathtub with these oh a lifetime supply of Lucky Charms marshmallows I wanted a raise wait wait a minute the Lucky Penny stupid Penny I'd rather be the Buccaneers going to the Super I finally get a day to just sit back relax and not go anywhere come on Marvin we're all going to the beach the beach yes the beach it'll be fun day I'm a swimming whale poop I don't want to go to the beach it's hot and Sandy I don't like it but Marvin it's a beautiful day out we need to be outside no I don't want to go and D I'm also going to tan my beach balls well I'm not going you guys go I'm going to stay here no we're all going Marvin you're being a stupid Beach very mature come on Marvin isn't the beach so nice no I hate it it's hot I want to go home Marvin stop whining just try to relax hey Dan can you help me build a sand castle no I don't want to play in the sand I don't want to get all sandy Marvin go build a sand castle with Jeffy I don't want to won can go play in your water no Jeffy you might drown Marvin let him have some fun yes Jeffy you can go swimming just don't go out too far yay can we go home yet no Marvin we just got here I just lay on the towel water scary water help see Marvin isn't this relaxing yeah I guess it is Jeffy Mar jeffy's drowning oh I don't know what to do Mara go save him I don't know what to do help I I don't I don't I don't know huh someone needs help I got you bro don't worry I got you I'm not going to let you drown oh my God thank you for SA leaving him we're not out of the woods yet breathe damn it breathe oh you saved my life Mister oh thank you for saving our son yeah that's what I do wait Brad what Rose I haven't seen you in forever what you know each other yeah he's one of my exes Marvin you didn't tell me about bread yeah he was not important enough to come up hey what's up man my name is Brad with a big D at the end cuz when a girl goes on a date with me that's what she gets at the end and a big D well it was nice meet you Brad thanks for saving our son let's go no Marvin wait we should do something nice we should invite him to dinner we don't have to do anything nice for him he's a lifeguard he's supposed to save people well I'm actually not a lifeguard I was just laying on the beach working on my perfect tan and I saw that kid needed help so I just did what any good person would do well that's nice that's really nice Brad so we're going to leave now no Marvin we have to thank him we don't have to thank him Brad come to dinner tonight okay but I'm pescatarian so I only eat fish but you'd know that wouldn't you Rose he likes salmon oh okay well that's real nice all right well we're going to leave come on Jeffy Jeffy I'm so glad you're okay I can't believe you invited your ex to dinner wow thanks for caring daddy Marvin he saved jeffy's life who cares again thanks for caring daddy well you didn't save him Marvin I would have if I would have had a swimming suit on I had this outfit on your only outfit yeah and to be fair Danny you did wear a tie to the beach I didn't want to go to the beach you literally dragged me there Marvin we're going to thank him and cook him a nice dinner I'm not cooking him dinner I'm not doing anything for that weirdo well fine chef peee will do it then Chef PE PE yes chef PE PE I already paid him you paid Chef peee to cook dinner for him yes Marvin we don't have much but we can thank him over a nice dinner why do we have to thank him I'm sure you thanked him enough when y'all dated how'd you even meet the guy anyway I was in California at the Santa Monica pier and we hooked up a couple of times Jesus a couple times I was young Marvin it didn't mean anything if it didn't mean anything then why did why is saving Jeffy meeting something to you like don't talk to the guy I don't like him you don't have to like him Marvin but we do have to thank him over a nice dinner why does it have to be a dinner why can't we write him a letter you want to write him a letter yeah I'll write him two letters f youu morvin oh that's a good one Daddy give me four fingers that's what I'm talking about yeah that was smooth go downstairs and help Chef Pee peee cook the dinner oh I'll help all right oh I I'll do stuff to the food M this looks delicious hey Chef peipe my wife said you're cooking dinner oh yeah I just got done this looks amazing I know thank you what are you doing what is it not supposed to look good no my wife's inviting her ex-boyfriend over for dinner oh with her ex oh why don't you just break up with well her ex kind of Saved jeffy's life he was drowning and she wants to make it up to him by bringing him over for dinner oh well that makes sense I thought you sucked at cooking I thought you made disgusting food well not when I'm getting paid and your wife paid me $20 so I went all out well I'll pay you 20 extra more dollars to spit in the food like I want to do gross things to it like when when he eats his food I want him to throw up like when he sees his food I want him to never want to come back ever again that's how gross I want to be oh you want me to go all out yeah I want you to ruin this food okay let's start with this yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah oh let's rub it all over the toilet yeah got the S got the all right Marvin I'mma clean the toilet with the salmon do do do it oh that's so gross I know I know oh that's disgusting oh watch this whoops oh that's so hilarious I this gross oh oh step out so I can use the bathroom okay hey Marvin let's put the strimp in this lter box oh that's disgusting let's do it isn't this the most diabolical disgusting horrible meal you've ever seen yeah oh it makes me want to throw up oh yeah that guy's definitely not going to want your wife after he eats this oh yeah definitely not he's going to take one bite he's going to run away and never talk to her again oh yeah definitely okay I'm going to go tell my wife that dinner's ready so I just make something normal for me and my wife okay okay are you going to pay me for that too yes yes all right baby dinner is ready wow Marvin you seem to be in a good mood yeah I realized I was being stupid getting mad that your ex-boyfriend's coming over for dinner well I'm glad you've matured Marvin yeah who's that that's probably Brad let's answerer the door okay hello hi Brad what's up thank you so much for coming to dinner thanks for not wearing a shirt oh I don't believe in shirts I just feel like they constrict me and I got to be free you know he's a free spirit you know did you have to bring a surfboard to dinner oh yeah you never know when a gnarly wave's going to rip by and also it's basically a part of my body like literally help it's fused with my hand and help well come inside that's what she said to me just shut up and come inside so like I mentioned at the front door this surfboard is stuck to my hand so please help me mm doesn't this food look good Bradley uh my name's actually Brad with a big D at the end cuz when I take girls on Dat I know you already explained it just look at the food a chef peipi made me a salad so Brad what do you do for a living bro I live for a living you don't have a job no wow baby it sounds like you dated a total bomb well actually Marvin Brad's family is very wealthy yeah have you heard of the Shell gas stations yeah yeah well my family invented those check the necklace your family invented the Shell gas station yeah so I'm loaded like a baked potato so all I do all day is just surf look at beautiful chicks and beg people to help me with this surfboard that's stuck to my hand please help me someone well I think it's time for us to eat because I'm as hungry as a shark you know I got bit by a shark one time really yeah at the aquarium petting zoo I punched him right in the nose cuz that's how you deal with sharks in case you didn't know you're so brave yeah I kept all its teeth on a necklace back home I got it at the gift shop I can give you one if you want but I only give it to people I really care about well I think we should focus on eating let's dig in yeah unfortunately I am left-handed and like I said I have this surfboard stuck to my hand so please dear God someone help me well you can just like you know eat with your face like a little piggy like a little dirty pig boy like a little like a little stinky pig boy yeah I I guess I guess they'll do that how is it Brad Brad Marin is choking how's it taste bread Marin Sayad is it gross I'm going to give him M mouth no no no you did that enough when y'all dat he it's okay he just he just had a mouthful Marvin call the doctor he's fine Marvin Brad Bradley we do something Brader oh baby I think he's dead oh no no no calm down just hold on hold on I'm going to call a doctor and let me talk to Chef B Chef B chefi hold on hold on let me guess Marvin he hated it no no no no no no he had a stomach egg and pooped everywhere no he threw up and pooped no no no he ran out of the house crying like a little baby no he's dead what he's dead no he can't be not from the food no no he died from eating the food we killed him no we didn't kill him no we just made the foood dirty whatever we did Poison him and now he's dead and we're going to go to jail no we're not going to jail I'm not going to jail for your relationship issues my Booty's too tight for that oh my my wife wants me to call a doctor what do we do look look look I'm going dress up like a doctor and I'm going just tell her that everything's fine he's just sleeping or something like that and then we're going to bury the body oh I like that idea that's a really smart idea I love that yeah yeah I'm very smart I know what I'm doing oh okay get a doctor outfit okay poor Brad Marvin did you call the doctor uh yeah he should be here any moment hey hey hey uh did somebody call a doctor yes doctor he choked and I think he's dead oh no he can't be dead no no no not from eating all this good food he's probably just sleeping with his eyes open yeah crazy kid let me check his PSE oh no Marvin he's dead he doesn't have a pulse I know that just lie to her is he dead oh no he's not dead he's just sleeping with his eyes open yeah some people fall asleep after eating good food he's just in a a food coma that's what they they call it oh I think I've heard of those before yeah yeah GL coma yeah yeah so doctor what would you suggest we do with the sleeping body uh oh we should drag the sleeping body to bed yeah yeah yeah yeah so so we're going to take the body and put it in bed you just finish your salad baby okay come on doctor hurry hurry H all right muffin let's get rid of this body muffin oh yeah you know I love that mustache baby no no no I got to fight these urges we got to focus on the body yeah the body first so how we get rid of the body you said we were going to bear it no we can't bury it the police doll can sniff out the body and and and dig out the body and we'll get caught oh we got to think of another way to get rid of the body uh have you seen bre and bad yeah I've seen Breck and bad yeah they put the body in the bathtub and then they pour the acid over it so it eats up the body oh that's genius yeah there will be no proof and there'll be no evidence and then the cops can't find them oh yeah well let's do that let's do that get the acid okay I'll get the acid you take the body of the bathtub okay all right I got the acid body decomposing acid where did you even buy this they sell it at Home Depot in the I don't want to get caught section and you actually bought it well I use cash there's no Trace okay good good no Trace I like that all right so I'm going to put the body in the bathtub and you're going to pour the acid on all right okay all right let's do that who's that I don't know let's answer it okay hello hey oh no the cops they must have found out about Brad's body hey what was that what was what that that thing you just did oh that was our secret handshake yeah handshake you guys didn't touch hands usually handshakes have hand touching at least oh oh no no we don't do that that's it's germs yeah yeah you know you know the pandemic's going on right yeah yeah so what are you doing here well I'm looking for a guy named Brad I don't know a guy named Brad don't know Brad I don't know Brad seen Brad in my life do you know Brad no I don't know a brad no I don't know a brad either I I know I'm just a chef I know it's Chad I think mhm Chad you know you two are the definition of suspicious suspicious don't got to fight these urges what what what was that no nothing nothing we don't know a brad you yeah you should ask the neighbors if they've seen Brad well I did and they said they saw Brad come here earlier today they did okay stop stop doing that I don't like that well look we have not seen Brad and and it's it's like it hasn't been 72 hours has it so he can't he can't have a missing person's report yeah yeah but his family's rich and they put a tracker in his surfboard and it says that he's in here okay fine he's here he's sleeping in the bathtub what are you doing I know what I'm doing yeah he's in the bathtub why is he in your bathtub he just wanted to take a nap so he just wanted to chill so just chill homie what okay I'm going to search the house oh no hold hold on okay so when the cop comes in the house hit him over the head with a rolling pin all right gotcha excuse me did you just fart no no I heard what you just said what did I say you told him to hit me in the head with a rolling pin no I didn't oh see that's just a a figure of speech yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah in my house uh hit him in the head with a rolling pin means offer him a drink yeah yeah are you thirsty what kind of uh flavor rolling pin would you like yeah yeah what rolling pin mhm I don't want a rolling pin I don't want a tall glass of rolling pin I just want to go find Brad so you two are going to stay in front of me the whole time what oh he just wants to look at her booties oh weirdo yeah he's a little but he's a little butt boy no I'm not a butt boy look look shut up I don't want to hear a word out either of you show me Brad okay all right Officer here's bread huh body decomposing acid what do you need that for uh uh what you see uh I was shaving in the bathtub and my hair got caught in the drain and and the people at Home Depot said uh to use body decomposing acid to get the hair out of the drain because it can decompose bodies and there's hair on bodies and the hair from my body is is what clogged the drain yeah yeah that thick mustache here yeah yeah yeah so that that's what I was going to use that for really cuz there's a body right there next to the body decomposing acid that's not a body that's Brad yeah that's just Brad yeah yeah he's sleeping yeah doing Brad stuff yeah he looks like he's sleeping with his eyes open and a shrimp in his mouth what you never been in a food coma sir yeah a food a food coma well no actually I have cuz my wife doesn't cook good enough for that to happen oh well uh you're the one who he hey hey hey hey hey you both had something to do with this so you're both going to jail come on I don't want to go to jail dirty killed him so that's what happens what hold on he's not dead he he's not no he has a very light pulse you can still save him yeah let me just uh get my doctor outfit on drag him upstairs and do CPR what no do do it right here no no no no no no no no good got to be upstairs no no do it right oh bring upstairs bring upstairs all right all right doc we have them on the couch all right I got my outfit on I'm ready to do some CPR hurry hurry hurry e there's a shrimp in the way I don't like shrimp all right let's get that out of there he's breathing oh hey I have a really bad shellfish allergy what you have a shellfish allergy I thought you were a pescatarian well yeah but not that pesky what oh wow I I guess you guys aren't going to jail after all we're not going to jail I'm free hey Marvin is Brad okay yeah I'm okay babe he has a shelfish allergy well hey since there's a doctor here hey Doc you think you could take the surfboard off my hand it's like stuck there and it's ruining my life please dear God help me all right you folks have a nice night all right crass you're about to go out on spring break so that means 2 months of no school cuz the cough cough going around and we don't want you kids getting sick some of you may die but that is a sacrifice I'm rearing to make so you kids be careful because there's no toilet paper or hand sanitizer and I know you kids are walking around with a dirty booty hey Junior what's up Cody I have hand sanitizer you have hand sanitizer no shut up Junior you have hand sanitizer no no I don't yeah you do you have hand sanitizer everybody he has hand sanitizer no I don't get him crass no no no no get off of me you bunch of monsters what's the world coming to oh Mario I'm so excited to tell Jeffy that we're taking him to Disney World I know he's been wanting to go for years and we finally get to take him for spring break I wonder how his day was today at school hey mommy hey Daddy I'm back from school hi Jeffy how was your day well I got in a fight but I won this booger juice hand sanitizer Jeffy do you know how valuable this is I can sell it on eBay for like $1,000 that's greedy Mario but but baby I could sell it and we could pay for our whole trip come on let's Tell him about his surprise okay Jeffy we have a surprise for you is Mommy pregnant no did do plumber pipes like Jeffy not him so what's your surprise uh the surprise is get the thing baby we're going to Disney World Mario is is Jeffy okay I think Jeffy we're going to Disney World Disney yay Mickey Mouse Jeffy Jeffy Jeffy Jeffy he has a a heartbeat should we call a doctor yeah let's call a doctor Mario yeah let's call a doctor hey there somebody call a doctor yes we did Doctor see look we told my son that we're going to Disney World and he made that face and it's been stuck like that so is he going to be okay oh yeah I've seen that face before that's the face I made when I caught my wife cheating on me I was like you know not because she was cheating on me but because I was surprised that another man would actually be attracted to her so was Jeff she's really ugly and all is Jeffy yeah I've seen that face before I was making that face when she was cheating on me is Jeffy I'm not going to bringing it up because I mean you know you know she cheated on me is Jeffy and you know she's ugly all right doctor is he going to be okay or not well I mean what I would do wait is that hand sanitizer uh yeah dog I will buy that off of you I will give you $100 for that hand sanitizer $100 yeah I got it right here look how about how about $200 what2 200 but it's half a bottle I know but it's really valuable it's rare to find okay I feel like I'm getting ripped off but here you go oh yeah $200 Mario you disgust me I got two hundo baby disy world uh yeah Jeffy yeah we're taking you to Disney World you're really going to take me Daddy yeah we're going to take you to Disney World Jeffy I'm going to go start packing daddy you're your best daddy ever a that's so cute you know my kids never say anything like that to me all they ever say to me is where were you and where's that child support and you spend too much money on hand sanitizer you know lame stuff like that well anyway do you mind if we watch some TV I'm going to put it on in practical jokers breaking news okay for the first time ever Disney World will be closing tomorrow afternoon due to the cough cough that is making people sick so if you had plans to go to Disney World well that sucks for you what this isn't Impractical Jokers I'm going to find Impractical Jokers Mario Disney World is closing tomorrow I know and we already told Jeffy he was going well that sucks impr practical joke is isn't on today oh yeah and it also sucks about your kid he seemed really excited to go so I don't know what you're going to tell him well he didn't seem that excited so maybe he's not even that happy to go go hot dog Daddy I'm ready to go to Disney World oh he's even got the Mickey Mouse costume on it's going to be so sad when you tell him he's going to be heartbroken well uh Jeffy mommy has something to tell you Mario um Jeffy I think Daddy has something to tell you uh no I think mommy has something to tell you and I'm not going to say it um Jeffy Daddy and I cannot take you to Disney World tomorrow so who's going to take me oh tell them all right Jeffy look you can't go to Disney World tomorrow because they're closing it cuz everyone's sick so you're not going to be able to go for a long [Music] time Jeffy don't cry it's not your fault Jeffy it's the world's fault they're sick oh Mario I am to cry what are we supposed to do about it Jeffy stop crying I mean look well they did say that they're closing tomorrow afternoon so we can still take him tomorrow morning Mario I do not want Jeffy getting sick yeah you want to avoid crowds of 50 people or more that's how you get sick you definitely want to stay away from anybody that's sick oh oh oh man sorry about that I just got back from a huge crowd of 50 people or more it was a big party and a confined space we had a coughing fight but I lost hey do you mind if I lick your couch okay well look how about we take him to the park tomorrow and we put him in one of those hazmat suits you know where where no no germs can get on him uh hey do you mind if I lick your remote too hey do you think you can get him a hazmat suit oh yeah hazmat suit I can do that yeah so do you think it would be safe to take him to Disney World in a hazmat suit yeah sure I don't see why not I'll go get one but uh I'm going to lick the floor on the whole way over there okay so I think this might work baby we can go to Disney World if he's in a hazmat suit he'll be safe right I hope so all right there's your hazmat suit as long as you're wearing that you can't get sick you hear that Jeffy you still get to go to Disney World since I'm dressed like a banana I can still go to Disney World yeah because you're dressed like a banana you get to go to Disney World yeah yay you know I would recommend taking along some hand sanitizer since you're going to be touching all those rides so I'll sell you some for 400 bucks oh that's okay I have some Clorox wipes I'm going to wipe down everything hey hey how much do you want for that no all right maybe my kids are right I should probably stop spending so much money on sanitary supplies G well Jeffy you ready to go to Disney World yeah Dad let's go let's go oh Mario I still don't think it's such a good idea that we go why I don't want Jeffy getting sick do you see what he's wearing he's not going to get sick Mario I think we should stay no we're going we already did all this stuff we're going come on we're going [Applause] [Music] okay all right Jeffy we're here Disney World yay Disney World I don't think we should be here we're going to get sick we're not going to get sick wait what are they doing to the castle they're wiping it down they're sanitizing it so no one gets sick I don't think Mickey Mouse paid his rent so they're taking the castle down daddy that's Cinderella's castle not Mickey Mouse Castle no Daddy Mickey Mouse lives there no Cinderella lives in there no no Jeffy where do you want to go what ride do you want to ride I want to ride the horsey ride I don't think that's a horsey ride here Jeffy Mario it's the carousel oh well I don't Carousel about riding that ride I want a divorce but baby all right Jeffy you ready to ride the horsey ride yeah D I'm ready what are you doing Mario I'm cleaning why I don't want Jeffy to get sick Mario do you see what he's wearing he's not going to get sick better safe than sorry all right let's ride the horsey ride ride the horsey ride the horsey ride the horsey okay we're going to ride it Daddy why are you up there what why you down there now why you back up there because the ride goes up and down why you down there because it goes up and down but why why are you down there what are you doing I'm still cleaning Mario enjoy the ride I am once's it's clean dang this horse is being nutty stop it Jeffy we have to take you off oh D why you down there Jeffy why you up there a Mario let's get some Micky ears okay grab whichever one you want hey Daddy I want the ones with the bedons on it then grab it I don't like it you just said you like that one no I didn't Jeffy grab it a all right so you get those roselena did you find the ones you want yes Mario I love these well Jeffy loves those I don't like it he doesn't like it but he he's wearing them so they're so cute all right then get them come on let's go all right Jeffy we have a surprise for you Mickey Mouse Mickey Mouse Mickey Mouse Mickey Mouse Mickey Mouse Mickey Mouse we're so happy to see you Mickey Mouse let's let's get a picture all right yeah why aren't they taking your counsil down Mickey mousey Jeffy we have to go okay okay that carousell was filthy Mario Oh Daddy I want to ride the buz light ride all right let's go ride it Jeffy y all right Jeffy shoot the aliens okay dny e Jeffy don't touch that what are you doing Mario I have to clean it he's not going to get sick he's going the hzm suit I'm almost done and okay Jeffy go Jeffy start shooting the aliens die aliens die I want to play too Mario wait okay you're such a clean freak I'll make it a higher score than you Jeffy yay I won daddy 54,000 you didn't win I got 1,500 with baby we're supposed to win Mario I won I won I won I won okay you won Jeffy yay oh Mario I want to go on this ride what to do it's spin come on come on Jeffy get on this ride all right all right Jeffrey we're on the teacup ride daddy where are we H out to coffee cup I'm not coffee oh I've always wanted to go on this ride let me clean up first no baby you don't have to clean you don't have to clean every ride Oh Daddy I don't feel so good why are we spinning that's what the ride does you have to throw up stop clean you have the clean stop throwing up let's get off the ride come on poor Jeffy Jeffy you're not that sick stop it Jeffy stop throwing up all right Daddy I'm done wait where's the throw up oh I just making weird noises at the bush Daddy come on Jeffy what ride do you want to ride next oh let's go ride dumbo why Daddy I want to ride the Moose ride Jeffy those are elephants no they're not they're mooses oh Mario know I don't feel so well after that teacup ride and watching Jeffy throw up I think I'm going to sit this one out but but here take the wipes and wipe it down okay okay come on dad let's go ride the mooses yay Danny we're inside the Moose y hold on let me clean up first Jeffy okay Daddy we're so high inside Mr moose yeah we're inside a flying moose Jeffy Oh Daddy I'm getting scared Mr moose put us down put us down Mr moose put us down right now it it won't work Jeffy I'll get us down make your get us down Jeffy freaking out make your Mo oh hold on it's taking us down Jeffy we got to go we got to go find Mommy okay let's get off Jeffy hi Mario how was the ride did you clean it yes I cleaned it and Jeffy didn't like it oh Jeffy why are you crying cuz Mr moose was mean and he wouldn't put us down and it was really scary I didn't like it it wasn't even that scary Jeffy what ride do you want to ride now I want to ride the big water ride W that sounds like fun there you go let's go ride it see Daddy the poop ride you get in the poop and you go down the toilet well Jeffy you're not old enough to ride that ride that ride's for Big Boys Mario sure he's old enough to go down that ride shut up you know I'm afraid of big drops Mario you'll be fine but it's so so so scary you go down like this big drop and I I don't like riding in poop Jeffy come on Dan let's go ride the poop okay bye all right Jeffy are you sure you want to ride this ride yeah Daddy we're in a poop we got to go down the toilet but but we can get off right now Jeffy no we got to go down the toilet okay we're go on the toilet yay oh Jeffy what's happening all right daddy we're about to go down the toilet well I don't want to Jeffy let's exit let's get off hey hold on no no Jeffy I don't want to here it no Jeffy no I don't want to go down the toilet no no [Music] no I'm I'm soaked Jeffy I'm soaked yeah D let's do it again it again I want to get off daddy we were a boo I know and I want to get off oh Mario how was the ride it looked like so much fun I saw you guys screaming it sucked Mommy that ride we show pee PE or poo poo oh my gosh I just realized you didn't wipe down the ride hold on we didn't have to C oh my goodness you guys are you're going to get sick no no we're not going to get sick let's just go get on another ride my hat all right Jeffy what ride do you want to ride next I want to ride Space Mountain okay let's go ride it excuse me folks unfortunately at this time the Magic Kingdom is closed and we're asking our guests to make their way towards the exit we have to leave it's closed Daddy I really wanted to run Space Mountain we have to go home Jeffy Jeffy stop crying I want to go back to Disney World Jeffy it's closed I wanted to ride Space Mountain you know you can't ride Space Mountain it's only for astronauts you're not an astronaut well I want to ride Splash Mountain one more time well go sit in the bathtub and pretend you're on Splash Mountain again oh Mario I hate seeing Jeffy sad well he shouldn't be sad he got to go to Disney World some kids never get to go to Disney World and he got to go before it closes for a long time Mario what's that noise do you hear that Jeffy what are you doing Jeffy what are you doing Splash Mountain [Music] weffy all right craft today we're going to be doing wood shop so with the very dangerous and high powered tools on your desk you're going to be making a wooden sculpture oh man this Hammer's so cool wo isn't this kind of dangerous awesome hey Cody tag your it Joseph get away from me you're going to poke my eye out with that thing dude it's what I'm trying to do you know what you like it stop it uh teacher what are we supposed to make anything you want see I made a birdh house so get started Kraft okay teacher J put Cody down dude he's having fun put him down all right dude oh God I'm going to throw up Cody are you okay a dude stop being a baby I gave you a roller coaster ride yeah Cody what are you going to make out of wood I don't know probably a unicorn gay well what are you going to make ooh a shark straight I know what about you Junior what are you making I think I'm going to make a dinosaur dop why did I only get tape and scissors because you're a girl you can't be trusted with high powerered Machinery us men can handle this not you whatever I'll still make something better than you hey idiot what are you going to make um not really sure you should be calling me names today whatever idiot don't do it Jeffy don't do it uh teacher can I see the nurse is that an axe in your head yeah crass make sure you be careful with the tools you only have 15 minutes all right CR stop working your 15 minutes is up I'm not going to come around the cross and see what you mean hey Cody check out my dinosaur sick Dino Junior not cooler than my Shark though hey Penelope what did you make I made a house what a lame house you didn't even put a door I didn't have enough time Junior hey everybody look at Penelope's lame house she didn't put a door that means any guy can come and go whenever they want like between her mom's legs shut up your mama ho your mama ho all right pany what did you make I made a house okay where's your door oh I didn't have enough time okay B minus all right Junior what did you make I made a dinosaur great where's his eyes uh it it's a blind dinosaur B minus all right Joseph what did you make oh I made a shark okay where's his body uh B minus a all right Cody what did you make uh I made a unicorn head Oh yay finally someone who made exactly what they said A+ what that's not fair all right Jeffy what did you make I made a machine gun oh Jesus Christ grass he finally doing it everyone in the Des night we practice soone call the cops I knew he was going to do it is always the weird kid I thought Cody was going to do it thanks Junior get out the desk get out the desk all right kids I'm here stay calm it's safe now just everybody stay under their desks what's going on hey there crazy just calm down don't do anything stupid I don't know what you're talking about it's okay just hand me the weapon it's made out of wood all right I'll be the judge of that I know a gun when I see it all right everybody I got the gun run run for your lives wait wait a minute this actually is made out of wood man kid you're in big trouble for getting my hopes up like that I thought I was going to be a hero today but still you're still in big trouble cuz you can get expelled for pulling a stunt like this you're lucky I don't arrest you I'm sorry what's wrong Marvin I have this weird feeling that Jeffy did something bad at school today oh Marvin you worry too much just sit back relax we'll watch TV okay breaking news K this student made a weapon during his shop class and sparked Panic across the entire School cops are on the scene now dealing with the situation more on the story as it develops oh my God I told you I had a feeling Jeffy was to do something bad hey Dy guess what so I was doing my project in school and the teacher said I was doing such a good job that I got to come home early and now I never have to go back Jeffy what did you do your son did the worst thing imaginable what'd he do well on the car ride over here I was drinking Hawaiian Punch and he asked me if he could have a sip and I said no you have little kid germs and he said don't worry you'll water falling so he goes to drink it and he spills it all over my car it gets on the seats it gets in the cup holders it gets on the floorboards big sticky mess I am not happy no no I I meant what happened at school oh that yeah that wasn't as bad yeah he just made a gun out of wood and everybody thought it was real so they got scared what Hawaiian Punch but baby we're past that part no I know but it's just so red and sticky yeah I know believe me I have to clean it up I'm pretty pissed no no no no no the more important thing is let's talk about Jeffy at school what's going to happen oh he's getting expelled expelled well yeah but the school said they'll let him go back to school if he completes a one day Juvenile Detention class school thing that I teach okay when is the class oh it's tonight and if he fails he's going to go to jail go to jail so he has to pass it he has to pass it to go back to school and 99% of the people who take my class fail well doesn't that mean you're just a bad teacher no it means they're bad people it's not my fault okay so so jeffy's going to go to the class tonight and he's going to pass right Jeffy yep all right I'm going to go clean out my car okay Jeffy why did you do that it's not my fault I spilled the Hawaiian Punch he went over a speed ball no no not that why did you do the thing at school well because the teacher said that I could make whatever I wanted out of wood so I made a wooden gun and it doesn't shoot [ __ ] which a Jey language okay look let's just all calm down Jeffy you're going to go to the class tonight and you're going to pass it okay I captain hey do you guys have napkins like like a whole bunch of napkins yeah in the kitchen okay I'm going to need a lot of napkins though oh go go to the kitchen oh my God does it why is this my life M this looks so yummy hey can I have some of these paper towels yeah sure thanks hey hey what are you doing wait what are you doing hey what are you doing I'm getting paper towels you said I could why so many look man my car is covered in Hawaiian Punch I need this many paper towels no you don't yes I do no you don't yes I do no you don't hey look over there what wait hey stop it hey you can't stop me my paper towels God he was so annoying who is that wait what do you want hey I'm going to need a lot more paper towels than this can I have the rest no I don't want to be here hey kid what color your blood what happened to your eyes I tattooed my eyeballs with my pencil all I see is Darkness you want to try no suit yourself I want to St your fire I don't regret the people I killed give me your eyelids no I said give me your eyelids go away all right all right settle down you freaks welcome to be good school where I teach you how to be good all right you are all menaces to society the world would honestly be a better place if you did not exist so I'm going to try to fix you now there are three main rules on how to be good the first rule is manners now that includes things like saying please and thank you and according to my wife not pissing on the toilet seat but I do it anyway it's not my fault you have to pee sitting down just pee standing up like a man anyway who wants to give me an example of manners can I please start a well no you can't start a fire but you did say please and I like that that's one step in the right direction and then five steps in the wrong direction because you asked to commit arson okay look I'll give you a real life example of manners okay let's say you're at a restaurant and you order some chicken strips and a side of ranch and so the waiter comes and he brings the chicken strips but he forgets the ranch and you say excuse me I think you've forgotten my Ranch and he says oh right I'll be right on that and then I don't see him for 15 minutes and then he comes back he says can I get you anything and I say well I really would like my Ranch and then he says oh right of course the ranch and then he disappears for 30 goddamn minutes and then has the Bulls to come back and say hey can I get you the check and I say what you can get me is my [ __ ] Ranch and he says well you can't talk to me that way and I say I can talk to you any way I want let me see your manager and then he says I am the manager and I say well that's funny because your name tag says waiter so go get me the manager so then the manager comes over and says is the is there anything wrong here and I say yeah look at my dry chicken strips I want some ranch you're going to cop me this entire meal for free or I'm going to put one of my ball hairs in the food and say that you did it and I'm going to get this entire restaurant shut down and then the manager says oh I'm so sorry sir I'm going to comp you your entire meal all your food is free today and then I say thank you see that's manners I said Thank you so did anybody learn anything um I learned not to forget your Ranch yes yes you don't forget the ranch that's exactly right I mean chicken strips without ranch it's like a car without tires what are you even going to do with it yes exactly you're going to make an excellent waiter someday if Applebee's ever starts hiring felons okay now the second one is helping people you got to help people it's just the nice thing to do okay now I'll give you an example what do you do if you're driving down the street and you see a girl whose car is broken down on the side of the road you stuff her in the trunk no you don't do that you set a car on fire no what is it with you and fire what kind of car is it why does that even matter maybe I can steal it don't know but you can't steal it cuz it's broken down and you shouldn't even want to anyway cuz that's wrong come on think people do you cut off her face and wear it I don't think it's that one it's definitely fire no no no no no no no all of you are stupid does anyone have an actual good answer um pick her up and take her on a date to Applebees but ew no not Applebees were you even listening to anything I was saying no she'd be better off just on the side of the road she'd be just as hungry you know she'd just have to wait 30 minutes to get her chicken tenders and Ranch any anyway no no no no no look I'll give you a real life example of helping people so my grandfather was incredibly rich I mean he was a millionaire just filthy rich and so he was in the hospital and I was visiting him every day you know to make sure I got a piece of that and then I see that he's on life support he's being kept Alive by a machine now I'm thinking what kind of life is that that's no way to live being kept Alive by a machine but he seems happy he says when I get this heart transplant tomorrow I'm going to feel so much better I can't wait to get out of the hospital and I hear I can't wait to get get out of the hospital so I'm thinking I'm going to do the right thing and I'm going to help him and I'm going to I'm going to end his suffering and pull the plug so I do and he flat lines and all the nurses come running into the room and I just say that I tripped on the power cord and they believe me and then come to find out what did he leave me in his will a sofa can you believe that I killed my I I mean I helped my grandfather go to heaven or hell probably if all he left me was a sofa hey you know what kid ask your dad if my grandfather's in Hell okay thank you see there you go he helping me by asking if my grandfather's in hell all right so we've covered two already manners and helping people we just have one more left to cover now does anyone want to guess what that is starting fire eating people's faces great the auto total Annihilation picking your nose and eating it no to all of that because most of those were crimes and the third one is don't do crimes okay now crimes is stuff like killing people stealing things yes setting things on fire is a crime crime and what I did to my grandfather was a crime and so is what I will do to you if you tell anyone you heard that all right so now we're going to have a test that will make you have to use all three of the be good rules okay and you have to pass this test to not go to jail but first i'm going to have a lunch break and eat my very big foot long imaginary sandwich I just hope it's not too big choking he's joking we have to do something should set him on fire while he's choking we should eat his face and we choke too let's just watch is the other a wallet I'm coming to help you Jeffy you saved me thank you you're welcome see class that was it that was the test Jeffy passed because he did all three of the be good rules he helped me when I needed it I said Thank you and he said you're welcome so that's manners and he didn't commit any crimes like the rest of you did by not helping me cuz that was the crime of criminal negligence so Jeffy is the only one who's not going to jail a what was that serious so how do you think jeffy's be good school is going I think it's going to be bad you know cuz it's called be good so he's going to be bad be bad yes bad hey D guess what I passed you passed sure did yep he saved my imaginary life you know most students don't save my life whenever I choke on the imaginary sandwich but your son did so he passed he learned how to be good he learned his manners he learned that he should help people he learned not to do crimes and he learned that he should get me my Ranch at Applebees so does that make up for the Hawaiian Punch M I forgot about that before now all right listen kid you better hope I never have to see you again well Jeffy look at least you passed you're not going to jail and we can put this whole thing behind us yeah hey so I got a call from a kid with an axe in his head and he said you did it uh uh all right we're going back come on oh Marvin it's so hot the is broken it's like 100° in here hey Jeffy huh can you blow me he a what like with a fan oh you should have just said that Daddy oh that feels so good hey I want some a so much better Jeffy blow me again stop saying that dadd it's weird hey no come back Mommy look it's hot in here you should probably just take your clothes off ew Jeffy she's your mother stepmother and I've seen plenty of videos where stepsons eat their stepmom's fish biscuit tell me that's gross get out of here all right Marvin you need to call AC repair man but that's going to cost money but it'll be worth it okay I'll call one and see if he can do it cheap hey there thanks for calling expensive AC repair services Marvin you called expensive AC repair services well I tried calling super cheap AC repair services but they didn't answer yeah I never answer that phone what anyway what's the problem well our AC is broken I think oh that sounds expensive yeah I guess I can get my ladder out and go look at it but it's going to cost you how much how much you got baby how much do I have in my wallet uh um about $94 oh that's crazy cuzz that's exactly how much I charge to get my ladder out and look at your AC unit okay here you go o it is hot in here this cash is cool okay yeah uh let me go get my ladder and I'll take a look at it okay time to figure out what's wrong with the AC so I can charge them more money okay let's see what's wrong with this AC what haunted toys do not touch okay not touching that let's see here oh well the AC's not broken it just got turned off all you have to do is turn it on but then I can't charge them a bunch of money okay I know I'll go downstairs and tell them that the whole AC unit is completely destroyed and that it's going to be really expensive to fix and then I'll come back up here just play on my phone for like an hour and then turn it on until I fixed it yeah oh man it is it is just a train wreck up there so it's broken oh broken is not even the right word I would say destroyed demolished pillaged Savaged desolated even so it's broken yeah it's broken yeah what happened to it oh I can't even imagine what could have caused such destruction was your house struck by lightning and a tornado 100 times I don't think so well I mean it is on fire what fire yeah and it's flooding at the same time I I don't even know how it's crazy flooding with what with [ __ ] from the sewer cuz I guess your sewer got mixed up so whenever you flush the toilet [ __ ] comes out of your AC oh oh can I go up there and look no no no no don't do that cuz it's also spraying asbes and in carbon monoxide it's very dangerous okay well then how are you going up there I I had a hazmat suit but I took it off cuz it was itchy from all the asbest well can you fix it oh I can but it's going to be really expensive like how much oh like like $5,000 cash we don't have $5,000 cash well I guess I could do it for $33,000 cash I don't think we have $3,000 either well how much cash do you have baby how much cash do we have if you went in your purse and like check the safe in the room um maybe like $500 I guess I could do it for $500 cash as long as it was Cash wait how can you go from $5,000 to $500 well I just feel so bad cuz you're living with a hazard you know it's dangerous so I got to take care of it so yeah I'll do it for $500 as long as it's cash baby get the money okay yeah thank you for doing this for us here you go my problem yeah okay yeah this is great okay so I'm going to go work on that just don't check on me okay it's very very dangerous uh by the way do you have a phone charger what do you need a phone charger for uh my phone's dying and I really wanted to listen to some tunes while they work you know That's What I Call Music 86 it's too much trouble to go find new music so I let them bring the music to me you know that's what they call music That's What I Call Music that's what I always say okay I'm going to go get work just don't come up there okay it's too dangerous what is that it's a Stairway leading right to the attic I bet my daddy's hiding my Christmas presents up there I'm going to go check it out it's s up here the North Pole's in my attic Santa Claus lives in my attic wow I can't believe I'm in Santa's Workshop haunted toys do not touch these must be special toys that Santa Claus made that he doesn't want anyone to play with well I'm going to go play with them all right let's check out these haunted toys Buzz Light here let's see if he can fly Woody was right he's not even a flying toy all right let's see what else we got in here oh what is this thing interesting all right ooh an ABC Board it'll help me learn my ABCs and B C D E F G oh and what is this looks like a magnifying glass so I can see the letters better and it says yes or no maybe I can ask it a question and it'll tell me um ABC Board am I going to get fat H it said yes yay I'm going to get fat ho thank you ABC Board you're welcome what who is that now open your mouth open my mouth why just do it oh okay Marvin it's so hot up here can we go downstairs but baby the AC is broken it's going to be hot everywhere but it's hotter upstairs because heat rises well if heat rises then my wiener has heat cuz it rises when I see whatever let's just go downstairs and make some dinner okay all right baby for dinner me and you are going to have a mashed potato bowl ooh yum and jeffy's going to eat green beans Jeffy dinner's ready what do you want old man Marvin why does Jeffy look like that Jeffy did you color yourself green with a sharpie no I've been possessed by a demon okay demon eat your green beans how about I just piss Jeffy stop peeing what's wrong old man you don't like piss stop it Jeffy Marvin why is Jeffy in a dress you're worried about the dress and not the pee okay good he he's stopping just getting more piss oh my God Jeffy stop peeing on the table you're you're peeing everywhere oh I'm sorry am I pissing you off Jeffy stop it all right I'm done Jeffy just go to your room all right oh my God he he peed all over the table baby what is wrong with him that's disgusting Jeffy you are so grounded he's got throw up he threw up every where Marvin I think he's really sick we need to call a doctor the AC guy he's a doctor let's go get him die pigs hey hey hey what how did you get up here wait are you playing Angry Birds yeah yeah I I I just I just finished fixing your AC I I did I also killed those pigs you got you got three stars well thank you yeah I did I did but was my AC even broken oh yeah it was super broken I just fixed that's that's why I have the screwdriver here you see cuz it was it was this screw it was loose and that that's what caused the whole thing you know so one screw being loose caused it to flood and catch on fire oh yeah you you'd be surprised what a screw can do it can really screw things up you get it that's an AC repair man joke you probably don't get it well like you're a doctor right yeah oh my son's really sick can you come check him out how much cash you got I don't got any more cash but do me a favor I guess you're right I've screwed you over enough today that was another one come on okay okay my son's in here well I put my doctor outfit on I put down towels because of the throw up ew he's throwing up yeah look at him Jesus Christ but why is his head spitting around like that well he's not sick you guys he's possessed but possessed Yeah by a demon so what do we do well you call an exorcist wait isn't he an exorcist no no no he needs an exorcist see an exorcist performs an exorcism to exercise a demon okay so I call an exorcist yeah okay do you think there's anyone around here H try Googling expensive Exorcist okay I'll see if there a cheap one okay I found a phone number for a place called cheap exorcism services oh I I wouldn't call them sh it's ringing uh that's that's probably my Mom calling I don't answer her well it's kind of weird that while I'm calling this number your phone's ringing I mean it is a coincidence but if you think about it there's 13.5 billion phone calls happening in the world every day so it's not that much of a coincidence that my phone would be ringing while you're calling somebody 13.5 billion phone calls yeah it's true look it up it's going to go to voicemail thank you for calling cheap exorcism Services since we didn't answer our phone maybe you should try calling expensive exorcism Services they always answer their phone what it say it said to call expensive exorcism Services yeah you should do that okay I'm calling them oh hey my phone's ringing oh I wonder who that could be hello expensive exorcism services oh wait that's me and yes I will do your exorcism for you how much cash you got just go get your outfit okay okay I got my outfit on screw you screw you screw you ow no throwing toy arms no throwing demon arms either father help him yeah help me Daddy hold on I got some holy water over here I mean it's just Fiji Water but holy cow is it good the power of Christ you the power of Christ no that that's from Wizard of Oz nice try look the holy water's not working but I've seen the movie I know what to do hey demon possess me instead open your mouth okay uh possess Buzz Lightyear ha I trapped him in this Buzz Lightyear toy I am Mrs N now I now all I have to do is throw him down the stairs to kill them take this demon Lightyear to infinity and hell I am Buzz Light okay I threw Buzz Lightyear down the stairs as long as nobody touches him we'll be fine Jeffy are you okay oh my head hurts yeah that's a side effect of being possessed by a demon I was possessed by a demon yeah but I took care of it so where's the cash give me $11,000 it's not called expensive exorcism services for no reason we don't have $11,000 oh yeah well guess what your AC wasn't even broken it was just turned off all I did was turn it on and then play Angry Birds on my phone so Jeffy how are you feeling who wants to watch me piss Marvin are you ready to go out on our date night sure baby let's go okay but did you find a babysitter to watch Jeffy Jeffy doesn't need a babysitter he's 17 years old I don't think that's a good idea to leave Jeffy home alone all he's going to do is watch TV look Jeffy did you just stab the couch with a knife no I just saw you do it then why' you ask I didn't think you were going to lie to my face Jeffy stop stabbing the couch with the knife give me $1,000 to stop what no I'm not giving you a th Jeffy stop it if you stab that couch one more time with the you are grounded mister I don't give [ __ ] but Jeffy Jeffy we were going to leave you home alone well that's not a good idea give me that give me that baby find a babysit on Craiglist I don't care how bad she is make sure she has huge cans what you got another knife give give me the give give me the KN Jeffy that is it you are grounded and we're going to get the meanest babysitter we can find all right Marvin I just called the babysitter she'll be here any second does she have huge cans there will be no cans Jeffy well what if she recycles you didn't think about that did you Daddy huh face there she is I'm going to go answer the door hello hi I'm the babysitter Vicky you must be jeffy's Dad yes I am jeffy's upstairs I can't wait to meet the little angel well come on inside all right Jeffy I want you to meet your babysitter Vicky hi y hello my name is hiy Jeffy why you talking like that talking like what ow okay stop say hi to Vicki in your normal voice hello Vicky okay I promise I'll stop this time hi Jeffy it's so nice to meet you now you two run along on your little date I'll take good care of Jeffy okay baby let's go bye Jeffy hey Danny real quick solid zero out of 10 stars on the cans her chest is flatter than her back Jeffy you be nice to the babysitter I'll try all right squirt I can't do that can you three things stay stay out of my way go to bed early and do the dishes okay well I got three things for you one get bigger cans two get braces and number three get bigger cans I just can't get over that go do the dishes what do I get out of it I won't kill you and I'll order pizza with the money your parents left all right just don't get green beans on your pizza I don't like green beans oh I'll make sure I don't get green beans Jeffy do the this I want the pizza I ha her all right all clean I am done with the dishes and I'm ready for pizza what you ate all your pizza don't worry twerp I saved you a piece what green beans I hate green beans what kind of toy do you got there it's my C Pio and it makes cat noises look give me that wait give me my cat piano back oh I'll give it back after I break it hey get back here hey stop hitting my champo whoops why would you break my Cho oh good look now you're in bed I don't want to see your face for the rest of the night I don't want to see your face for the rest of night oh Magic Ain ball when will my wiener ever be 4 in never oh stupid ain't ball hey Jeffy I'm Cosmo and I'm Wanda and we your fair god parents so what do you think Jeffy I think I'm calling the cops you can't do that if you tell anyone about us we'll disappear forever well that's what I want leave but don't you want your wishes wishes you guys Grand wishes yep we sure do we're magic uh Magic so I can wish for whatever I want as long as it follows the rules oh there's rules that's gay yeah you just can't wish for anyone to fall in love with you or wish for anyone to die H well I do wish that my cat piano wasn't broken oh well that's easy you guys fix my cat piano you guys really are magic we sure are we can grant any wish well almost any wish yeah that is awful just like you're cooking H I'm going to check on that ugly twerk oh no my babysitter's coming you guys got to hide well what do you want us to hide as I don't know um goldfish goldfish I don't have any cards he said goldfish you idiot well this isn't obvious at all this isn't going to work can you guys be like a smaller goldfish ooh I got an idea what's going going on in here I heard fun and I hate fun oh nothing I was just playing my cat piano I thought I broke that what's this you know the rules no snacks in your room oh no cozmo and Wanda these goldfish are loud poor Cosmo oh my head hurts she sure chewed you out you can say that again she sure chewed you out wait you guys are alive of course we are what goes in must come out that's one mean babysitter I don't know I kind of like her fangs yeah I hate her I wish she would fall down the stairs done and done I'm going to go downstairs for a [Music] drink that's got to hurt I hope she had a nice fall now I wish a bowling ball would fall on her head boo what if it kills her I wish a bowling ball would fall on her head how about a Mal concussion I'll take it okay uh-oh still right one that's baseball you idiot now light her on fire wa I think she's going to be out for a while let's go have some fun okay so Jeffy what's something you always wanted to wish for pee PE shucking fairies well you already got one of those you'll be surprised that it's not me wink wink Jesus well I wish I had a big booby to squeeze coming right up boo boo boo so how did you like your booby pretty scary huh well that's not really what I had in mind but I want a big round booby oh why you just say so hi so how do you like your pooby not pooby a booby a female breast you know what forget it I don't even want it anymore well what else do you want to wish for well I never got my cheese pizza so I wish for a cheese cheese pizza ooh can I have some no poopy get out of here shoot WS order up yay I finally got my cheese pizza did somebody say cheese that was a good one oh no Junior and Cody are coming you guys got to hide let's try the Goldfish route again and let's try not to get eaten this time okay hey Jeffy what are you doing oh no way bro you get goldfish you got cheese pizza hell yeah hey Junior how much to eat one of these fish a goldfish uh I'll eat if you eat one okay I'm down hey Jeffy can we eat your fish I don't care oh sweet oh I'm going like dunk my head and try to grab with my mouth yeah it's like bobbing for apples but the apples are alive and they don't want to die yeah that'd be sick um I think my head's too big for the bowl yeah and I I really don't want to get my hair wet it takes forever to braid these hey Jeffy if you ever take them out of the bowl we'll totally eat them okay all right wa that was a close one you were going to let him eat us well he's been eaten before that's true man Junior that pizza looked good do you want to ask Jeffy if he'll let you take a bite of his pizza yeah sure I don't have goodies hey Jeffy can we have your pizza what was that um nothing nothing what was that I thought I saw fairy gu pars no you didn't see that you didn't see that well what happened to your goldfish I ate them you were supposed to let us eat them oh he's too damn greedy too greedy well can we have your pizza yeah sure take it just go oh okay well it came off the plate Cody I got it I got it woo double close one we have to be more careful if anyone were to see us we'll disappear forever yeah I got it I know your rules all right Jeffy any more wishes you want to make yeah I wish I had paper like cash cash green Cash Cash what I wish I had money but Jeffy if you wish for money then that will take it from someone else I don't care I wish I had money okay oh Marvin I'm stuffed yeah this dinner was so good your bills sir all right let me just grab my money here you go what was that some kind of M magic trick sir where' my money go uh it was right here did did you see it go anywhere did it Blow Away no U oh oh I am so sorry uh well I don't have any more money well then you must wash dishes wash dishes baby do you have any money no I don't have any money Uh I that was all the money I had there you go well only a hundred bucks I wanted hundreds of thousands of dollars but Jeffy that's stealing I wish I had hundreds of thousands of dollars okay now this is more like it Jeffy this is wrong well I don't want to know what right is what are you even going to buy with this you could have just wish for it money cars and clothes and hoes I'll drink to that oh who threw that bowling ball at me I bet it was that twerp I'm going to make him pay 100 200 300 400 oh no the babysitter's coming not icky ficky hi guys what are you doing in here twerp C cash where did all this money come from and who said you could have fish I'm going to go flush them down the toilet no you're not who's going to stop me oh I wish the cops were here to arrest you whoa whoa whoa wait whoa whoa wa where the hell am I I was just in the shower and where did all this money come from wait am I am I a stripper officer what are you doing here I don't know she hit me what really why no I didn't arrest her well I don't know that I can just arrest her arrest her but I I don't think I can arrest her I I I I wish you'd arrest her H well for some reason I have the sudden urge to arrest you why I I don't know but I think I have to come on she better not drop the soap she's going to an all female prison Cosmo oh Jeffy why don't you give some of this money to charity I wish I had all the charity money Jeffy let's talk about this oh no my parents are home early you guys got to hide go back to being goldfish Jeffy we're home what Jeffy where'd you get all this money from my my very odd parents they're disguised as goldfish oh [ __ ] what happened to them they disappeared cuz I wasn't supposed to tell you about them but good news is we still have all this cash B well we could have used some of this money at the restaurant I thought I had money and then when I checked my wallet it was empty so we had to wash dishes all night well I had to wash dishes too and there's a shattered one downstairs so you might want to clean that up what happened to your babysitter oh she got arrested for hitting me tonight's been a whole thing I just don't really want to talk about it all right CR today we're going to be doing a kiss quiz I'll ask you a question and the first student to get the answer right will get a Hershey Kiss when I saw the board say kiss quiz I thought we were going to practice making out with each other and Junior was going to be my partner no my partner was going to be Penelope no way Junior dude we're always Partners what are you talking about I want to kiss Penelope guys it's not even about kissing well I bet I can answer more questions than you Penelope no way four eyes but you also wear glasses shut up cross all right first question who invented the telephone Alexander grandell God damn it corre P here's your kiss I got the first kiss Cody yeah I'm going to get the next one all right next question crass how many stars are on the original American frag 13 [ __ ] ha correct Cody here's your kiss look at my kiss oh let me get in there all right next question what was Abraham rink's nickname oh I got this the free the slave man no Honest Abe that was George Washington no that's honest George Oh no you're thinking of Curious George correct Junior here's your kiss ooh a kiss all right next question man I have so many kisses well I have more kisses and some of mine had nuts in them mine have nuts too well I don't have any nuts in mine wait a minute this isn't fair teach I haven't gotten any kisses all right Jeffy since you don't have a kiss yet I'll give you a chance to win the last one and this question is only for you so you're the only one allowed to answer it what year did the War of 1812 happen now this a trick question what year did the War of 1812 happen 1812 take away the four out of 6 2004 screw it here you go yummy all right CR that does it for today go home and enjoy your kisses hey Daddy hey Jeffy how was school it was great daddy the teacher gave me a kiss right here what yeah I answered the question right so he gave me a kiss right here morgon we have to call the cops oh hold on Jeffy this is a very very serious crime you're accusing your teacher of are you sure he gave you a kiss yeah he gave me a kiss and he gave everyone else in the class a kiss when they answered the question right are there any girls in your class Jeffy yeah Mommy this one girl got a bunch of kisses from the teacher myad I'm calling the cops right now hold on hey there somebody called the whoop whoop that's the sound of the police we did oh good so what's going on well we want to report a very serious crime oh no is somebody giving away toasts for outrageously low prices no oh well my wife wife says we need a toaster and I thought maybe you would know where I could get a cheap toaster well my son came home from school today and he says that his teacher gave him a kiss in his private area wa Whoo Kid is this true yeah he gave me a kiss right here oh my God we are dealing with a very serious Predator here are you sure yeah I'm positive he gave everyone in the class kisses oh oh my God okay wait wait a minute aren't you in the same class as my daughter who's your daughter Penelope oh yeah she got the most kisses with nuts oh oh Jesus oh God no my poor baby it's going to be okay oh I have to go call her I have to call her what do you want Dad okay Penelope this is very important did your teacher give you a kiss in class today yeah he gave me a bunch of them oh oh God no it's true oh okay that's it I'm going to go arrest him right now order order order order order order today order we will be hearing the case of the school teacher Jackie cheu who is accused of giving kisses to his students prosecutor tell me what's going on order well your honor I'm here today representing all of the kids who got a kiss from the teacher my daughter is one of them Penelope tell the judge what happened to you um well today in class we had a kiss quiz and every time we answered a question right the teacher would give us kisses and sometimes they had nuts oh oh God my poor baby oh oh God Jesus Oh Mr Chew you are being accused of a most heinous crime is any of this accurate to what actually happened yes it is all true we had a quiz and if the student answers the question right I give them a kiss and sometimes with nuts you're a monster order order order order order in mind court order Mr cheu you are a very sick man now tell me how many students did he give kisses to well your honor five students so far that we know of that is a lot of children Mr Chew what made you think it was appropriate to do such a thing to Children causing them years of psychological harm I thought I would give them an incentive to want to learn because every time they got the question right they'd be like Jackie CH give me a kiss give me a kiss so I kept giving out kisses and then sometimes they'd say give me some with nuts so then I'd give kisses with nuts in it and so I just kept giving kisses and nuts as your attorney I would advise you to stop talking Mr cheu I am sensing No Remorse for your actions just handing out kisses as if they were candy exactly uh Ur may I have a moment with my client please now listen here you practically just admitted guilt we're screwed but I didn't do anything wrong all I did was give the kids kisses the kids like the kisses oh I never should have become a public defender Mr cheu I already know you you're guilty now I just need to know how guilty prosecutor send in another one of the victims uh Cody can you come in here please yeah what's up uh the judge wants to ask you a few questions now young man how many kisses did you receive from Mr chw oh I received a lot of kisses but that's because I'm smart I received more kisses than you Cody yeah well that's probably cuz you're a girl and he felt bad for you nuh-uh and at least mine had more nuts oh no I definitely had or not no you didn't oh God order order order order order order order Mr Chew I know this is going to be very graphic to ask but how did you select which students received nuts with their kiss it was random whatever my hand decided to pull out oh Jesus Christ Mr Chew I am already planning on giving you the death penalty but just to be sure Beyond A Reasonable Doubt out prosecutor send in one more victim Jeffy can you come in here please hey everybody what doing now Jeffy is it true that you received a kiss from Mr Chew I did and how many kisses did you receive just one hm now that's interesting Penelope you received multiple kisses right yeah and Cody you received multiple kisses yeah but Jeffy you only received one kiss yeah I think it was a Pity kiss because everyone else is smarter than me and so they were just getting more and more kisses and so I think the teacher felt bad till he gave me a kiss Mr Che we have now heard from three of your victims do you feel bad at all for what you've done no I don't regret anything I've been giving the kids in my Cassis kisses for years the kids love the kisses they especially love the kisses with the nuts in big nut kiss I quit that's it you're on a fry this son of a [ __ ] I don't know what I did wrong Mr Chew you are clearly unable to tell right from wrong since you do not see what you did wrong and that makes you a danger to society prute dra let me hear your closing statements before I bang this gabble as hard as I can and yell guilty at the top of my lungs your honor I'm a father not a very good one but I am a father so today when my daughter came home from school and said Daddy Daddy I got the most kisses from the teacher I just couldn't believe it well I don't think that's true I think I actually got the most kisses shut up Cody it's not a contest kids what happened to you today was wrong that man is sick well I mean I guess it wasn't good to have that many kisses before lunch I thought they were sweet and at least nuts have protein oh Jesus your honor we're dealing with some serious Ted Bundy [ __ ] this man is sick and the fact that he's been doing it for this many years and the kids are just now coming forward there's no telling how many lives he's ruined your honor I'm begging you bang that gavl bang the [ __ ] out of that gavl and send this man to the electric chair where he belongs I have heard enough guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty guilty Mr Chew guilty that is what you are I sentence you to death by electric chair no by two electric chairs no by an entire electric bed with an electric toothbrush before you go to the electric bed and then Electric pillows and electric sheets and an electric bedtime story yes you will be killed by Electric bed and bedtime story tomorrow at midnight pay-per-view $49.95 then all of the money will go to the victim's families guilty yes justice honey we got Justice what the hell is happening why is he going to die for giving us kisses you're too young to understand but someday you will come on kids oh no come on you you you monster isn't this silly folks I was just the lawyer and now I'm the BFF isn't TV silly come on let's get you to your cell all right class my name is Brooklyn guy I'm going to be a new teacher since your last teacher was a monster and now he's going to die so I'm going to be teaching you until we can find a better replacement are you going to give us kisses when we get questions right no no no no no kids what he did to you was wrong okay there's not going to be any more kisses you kids are going to need therapy to get over there but I see some kisses on the desk right there what are you talking about what uh huh um what Hershey's Kisses almond oh no oh no class was your teacher giving you these kisses or kisses with his mouth the candy Dad yeah the candy yeah I wish it was with his mouth oh dear God kids we're about to kill an innocent man I have to go any last words before we fry you I didn't know it was wrong to give kids kisses wait wait wait wait wait don't don't pull it don't pull it Mr Chew I have a question for you what kind of kisses were you giving the students sometimes they had nuts and sometimes they didn't have nuts no no I know that but like what did the kisses look like they were little chocolate candies with aluminum foil wrapped around them oh my god oh get them out of there I'm an idiot I hate school what Cody what happened to your glasses dude you look like a freak oh yeah I got lasic so I don't need glasses anymore what's lasing well it's when they shoot lasers in your eyes to correct your vision but I don't need glasses now so now you guys can't call me four eyes well we can will call you a bugy freak yeah googly eyes well yeah I guess you could call me that but you guys are just jealous of my 2020 Vision you could only afford 2020 Vision you're so poor you bought 2-year-old Vision why didn't you buy 2022 Vision yeah get with the times dude but no it's not the year it's how good the vision is 2020 was a bad year Cody that's when the pandemic started you have sick eyes yeah get away from me dude yeah I don't want to catch your sick eyes okay whatever you guys see how dark it is cuz Daylight Savings Time ended yeah I hate when it's dark wao dude watch your mouth what's wrong with you yeah Cody what's wrong with dark well I just meant I hate when it gets it's dark outside what you got a problem with dark people is that what it is huh well no I didn't say that wow Cody you got those new eyes but you're still racist let's not do this I thought you could see better all right class today we're going to be learning how fast is the speed of light it's the fast see that little tiny red dot it traveled at 186,000 m/ second or 11,1 160,000 m per minute or 669 M 600,000 mph that little tiny red dot fast as [ __ ] whoa that's so fast Cody that's how fast your mom would run to the buffet if she wasn't so fat oh dude she can still run that fast regardless of her weight yeah your mom's the fastest land elephant what land elephant is there any other kind of elephant well Dumbo could fly he was an air elephant but Dumbo's not real I'm looking at him right now with those big ass [Applause] ears um teacher may I play with your laser device no Jeffy the laser pointer is a a very dangerous device if you point it at someone's eye it can make them go blind so no you can't play with it it's not fa I want to play with it all right crass this Daylight Saving thing is really screwing me up right now so you guys can go home class is over and I'm going to be putting the laser pointer right here okay right here no one touch it and I'm going to go home and go to bed because it's dark outside so I won't be here to see if anyone touches the laser pointer that's right here okay see the laser pointer everyone right here right here it's going to be right here so don't want touch it I'm going to go home okay it's right here man we really shouldn't touch that laser pointer yeah let's go home yeah dude yeah I'm not going to take that thing so guys what do you want to do today since school let out early well it doesn't feel early in the day since it's so uh say it dude say it I dare you uh night time outside H nice sa hey guys look what I got hey the teacher said don't touch his laser pointer well I touched it and I took it but the teacher said not to touch it Peter yeah Cody's right the teacher's going to get mad that you touched it well I just want to play with it for tonight yeah I guess we could play with it for a little while but the teacher shut up Cody we want to play with it for a little bit what are we even going to do with the laser Junior um I got an idea I got it ow Jesus my eyes ow I told Jeffy to do that why would you tell him that because you bought laser Li [ __ ] lasic eye surgery and you liked it so I thought you might want it again well that was a professional laser for fixing Vision yeah so I thought we could fix your vision by Shin the laser on your eye again no that's not how ow Jesus my other eye oh God okay now you have 2022 Vision Junior you're damaging my eyes I can't even see now oh you can see how many fingers can I hold up I I can't really tell ow Jesus did you see me doing that I felt it hey Jeffy shoot me in the eye let me see how bad it oh god oh Jesus okay it does hurt yeah it it does actually hurt what's going on dude ow dude okay call a doctor hey there somebody calling optometrist and we got to make this quick because I got to go fly a plane in a few minutes cuz I'm delivering a whole bunch of donor organs to a hospital so today I am a doctor SLP so what's going on our friend Shin a laser in our eyes and we can't see okay well that's dangerous but I don't really have time to diagnose you with anything so I'm just going to give you all glasses glasses yeah I'll go get them from my bag all right there's your glasses now I got a plane to fly wow Cody now we all look like you well it's your fault for shining a laser in your eyes nice Cody impression dude thanks Joe I've been working on it you know I was really trying to capture his voice but I think I got it I see you've been practicing uhhuh I'm really good at it now where's Jeffy Jeffy hey guys look what I found with the ler it's a gig cat me me me I mean a kitty cat guys I'm allergic to cats don't sneeze on you're getting all your germs on me I already caught your bad eyes I don't want to catch anything else guys can we just get away from this cat Jeffy can we return the laser pointer back at school because we're already hurt ourselves with it okay you guys want to walk with me yeah let's walk with them to school walk it like I talking okay guys let's walk to school and return the laser God it's so night time out here oh what's wrong with it being night time you can't see me when it's dark do I blend into to you no no I just think we need a flashlight I got a light that little laser is not going to help us see guys look at the full moon you want to see a full moon to pull down my pants oh oh there's an airplane oh Jeffy you should see if you can hit the airplane with the laser okay are you hitting it I don't know man what a beautiful night for flying just look at that Moon what a big moon I wonder if it's really made of cheese ow ow Jesus my eye my eye I can't see mayday mayday I'm going down oh guys is that plane going down maybe it's just Landing yeah it's just Landing it crashed [Applause] guys did we make that plane crash no Jeffy made that plane crash by shining a laser at the plane he probably blinded the pilot guys there's no way this laser blinded the pilot it could even reach that far yeah there's no way this cheap little laser could reach that far Cody the plane probably didn't even crash we heard the explosion what if that was a car crash on the interstate that exploded yeah what if a car hit a semi-truck carrying gasoline Junior we saw the plane going down well maybe it was a meteor with flashing lights on it no Junior that plane definitely crashed well listen it didn't crash until we have proof what's wrong Cody the news what the news [Music] look breaking news Okay a plane has reportedly crashed after a pilot was blinded by a laser pointer if you have any details on who could have done it call 911 immediately guys we did make the plane crash damn it I spilled my free medium french fries I get from McDonald's every week dude I'm out of here you know they always blame in the dark gu no Jessy get back here guys what are we going to do we we don't have to do anything jeffy's the one that shined the laser and you're the one who told them to do it I didn't have anything to do with any of this Jeffy can I see that what do you your fingerprints your fingerprints ah Junior why would you do that because we're all in this together from the top We're All in This Together no no no High School Musical [ __ ] guys we committed a serious crime you should be singing We all committed a felony yes we did that's what you should be singing Cody now is not the time to be singing a song what well listen there's some serious stuff going on right now okay we have to get rid of that laser pointer I can hide it up my stinky rectal hole yummy okay so look now that we hid the laser no one's going to check up jeffy's butt so look no one's going to come looking for us cuz no one's going to know where that laser came from they're not going to know it came from this house yeah I guess you're right they won't know where it is let's just sit back and eat some of your French fries eat Junior was at the doorbell no that was a smoke detector uh that was that was the neighbor's doorbell um Junior eventually you're going to have to answer the door okay look I'm going to go answer it if it's the cops we're going to hide just keep that thing up your butt hello hey did you just hear that explosion that was me I was just in a plane crash oh how'd you get in the plane crash I don't know I was just flying and then all of a sudden a laser came out of nowhere and hit me right in the eye and I got all confused and I get up and down messed up and then like I just crashed right into the ground luckily I parachuted out at the last minute but I still bang my face up pretty bad on some trees well I I'm so sorry about that it wasn't my fault well of course not how would it be your fault hey can I come in and use your phone I got a call just just everybody the FAA I got to call Sully and ask him how he got out of it I got to call Tom Hanks and see if he'll make a movie out of this one I mean I didn't land on the Hudson but I mean that explosion was pretty cool well yeah you can use my phone okay okay so where's this phone junior is that the pilot yeah he was the one that was flying the plane that crashed junior he can't be here I'll tell you what happened shut up Jeffy uh sorry sir we just realized that we don't have a phone but you don't have a phone kid this isn't funny I was just in a plane crash I got to call some people yeah sorry but you got to go you got to leave wait wait a minute aren't you the kids from earlier that were shining lasers in your eyes yes Junior but we don't have the laser anymore yeah cuz you T my ass uh we don't know where it's at did did you kids shine a laser in my eyes while I was trying to fly a plane no no no the only thing we shine the laser at was our eyes and maybe a helicopter but not your plane so yeah no it's our teacher has a has a laser pointer on his desk at school and he pointed at things maybe airplanes huh I think I need to talk to your teacher Junior you're going to get the teacher in trouble better him than us all right guys we have to go back to the school and put the laser pointer on the desk okay Jeffy take the laser pointer out and put it on the desk who wants to go splunking in some cheeks no I do I do I'm a professional okay I don't want to watch this m butt nectar just put on the desk come on let's go okay guys we did it yeah I guess we got off scott free who's Scott what you just said you got off a guy named Scott for free no no no no Scott free it's a saying what's it mean well I don't know who's Scott there is no Scott it's just a thing people say then why are you saying something if you don't know what it means well I I don't know it's just like a common saying what if I just said random words that didn't make sense like ants beehive Bear tree well that that wouldn't make sense yeah then there's no point in saying it so shut up okay fine so why did you call me here well word on the street is you have a laser pointer I do it's right here mistake showing me the evidence you've been shining that laser pointer at any planes no I've been shining it at the board to teach my students how fast the speed of light is well have you been shown him the speed of light by shining that laser pointer at my plane no huh likely story maybe I should just check this out for myself oh god oh why does it smell like dookie I have no idea huh let me think about this aha I have an idea I think you shine this laser pointer at my plane and then when the plane crashed you got scared and tried to hide it up your butt but then that got uncomfortable so you took it out of your butt and you put it on your desk no h liar all right you're coming with me so guys what do you want to do for the rest of the night well I guess I'm just going to go oh my God the news breaking news an elementary school teacher has been arrested as the person who pointed the laser pointer at a plane causing it to crash he'll be going to jail for a very long time wow Junior the teacher's getting in trouble now because of something we did we have to say something something Junior this is serious we just ruined his life okay listen Cody if we speak up we have to go to prison you want that well I think I could take it better than anyone else really you know in the butt listen I'm not saying anything I'm going to sit right here okay well I don't want to be a part of this so I'm going home what Jeffy can you believe him he really wants us to go tell the truth and tell the cop that we were the ones that shined the laser pointer and made his plane crash what wow I can't believe what I'm hearing what's going on well I just came here to give you the Triple T the truth tell a trophy because you told the truth about your teacher having the laser pointer that shot down my plane but now I don't know if I should give you this trophy it sounds to me like you're a fiber oh no no I'm not a fiber I'm I was telling the truth like look I promise I'm not lying well I can't give you the trophy until you tell me the truth okay okay listen okay listen we did take the teacher laser pointer and we shot it at your play on accident so can I have the trophy H there's another very important question in I need answered so whoever can tell me the truth will get the trophy now the question is if you guys are the ones who stole the Las a pointer why did it smell like [ __ ] cuz it was in my ass oh my God e e e e e e hey Daddy can I ask you a question what Daddy can I play out shine play out shine play out shine Daddy can I play outside because I really want to no Jeffy Daddy won't let me play outshine play outshine play outshine Daddy won't let me play outside cuz he is hucking f hucking f yeah Daddy replaced the the first letter of the last two words that's what you are [ __ ] F Jeffy you're grounded for what I didn't even say anything bad you meant to say something bad you can't tell me what I meant I I can tell you what you meant because you told me what you meant daddy you need a meant cuz your brush smells like poop okay now you're super grounded Jeffy all right daddy let me go get my Cape a cape why do you need a cape cuz I'm super grounded all right you know what I'm taking your cat Pio we're going to watch TV all right daddy we kind at least watch The Fairly Odd Parents we're not watching The Fairly Odd Parents we're watching Netflix wow hi guys I'm Joe my lovers call me Joe Exotic and I'm selling Tigers I got Tony the Tiger right here going for $22,000 and I'll sell them to anybody except for that Carol Baskin oh I swear to God she fed her husband to the Tigers somebody better look into that but anyway I'm selling Tigers to anybody come and buy them from Joe Joe Exotic that's me oh Danny I want a pet tiger Jeffy you're not getting a pet tiger they're super dangerous and they cost like $2,000 but Danny I poop $2,000 check my my merch sales B Jeffy I know you can afford a pet tiger but you're not getting one cuz they're dangerous Danny you want to know what's dangerous all this paper I could get a paper cut from all this paper Jeffy you're not buying a pet tiger and that's final dadd if you don't let me buy a pet tiger I'm just going to go buy like 20 of them Jeffy don't do that look okay fine you win I'll go buy you a pet tiger okay really dny you're going to buy me a pet tiger yep just wait right here and I'm going to get you a pet tiger PE PE all right Jeffy here's your pet tiger Daddy am I stupid yes when's my birthday uh August 20 obviously it wasn't yesterday I was not born yesterday daddy that is not a tiger that's a kitty cat Jeffy it is a tiger look he's orange well carrots are orange are they Tigers no I didn't think so cuz I don't ever remember Bugs Bunny chewing on a tiger going watch out doc Jeffy look this is a tiger I bought him from the zoo oh you bought him from the zoo Daddy all right well let me call the zoo and see if they sold you a tiger no no no no don't no don't oh hello this is the zoo oh hi did you sell a tiger to some weird weird guy with a red hat with an m on it oh no we're not allowed to sell Tigers all right thanks liar look I got him from the pound his name is pumpkin and he was free to a good home okay well this is not a good home you feed me green beans and make me do homework I wouldn't want to live here and neither does he all right Jeffy so you want me to get rid of him yeah I don't even want him get him out of here Daddy I want a tiger okay I guess I can give them to my friend who likes cats good all right I'll go give them to him come on and bring me back a tiger come on PP let's go thank you so much for my dinner I'm going to make cat soup I heard you like cats so I gave them to you oh thank you you're going to be really yummy on Kitty see you later all right Jeffy I got rid of the cat but you're still not getting a tiger Jeffy where did you get that tiger from Jeffy oh I bought it from some guy named Joe Jeffy why why' you buy a dangerous tiger because while you were messing around buying kitty cats I wanted a tiger Jeffy they are dangerous you have to get rid of him right now dad I've already named him what' you name him orange zebra cuz he looks like an orange zebra jimy that's not an orange zebra that's a tiger he's really dangerous get rid of him now D he's not dangerous I've already taught him how to play fetch with his rubber ducky Jeffy that's a chicken hey orange zebra fetch Jeffy Jeffy I am leaving the house until you get rid of that thing let go of it orange let go of it b b b b hey Jeffy what's going on nothing oh a lion oh it's actually a tiger but whatever oh can I pet it I wouldn't why' he bite me that's how he says hello I think oh that's so cool that you got a tiger yeah Junior but I got to go to the bathroom I got to take a rock and steamy dump so can you watch him for a little bit yeah I'll watch him for you all wa he's so cool it's a tiger I got to call Joseph so he can see this uh dude why did you make me put on a blindfold because Joseph there's a cool surprise right in front of you oh really what is it take your blindfold off what's going on why am I in a tiger's mouth because it's a cool pet tiger right this is not cool I think I'm it's okay it's okay he just said he likes you this is is so B I'm out of here sorry Joseph I guess Joseph just doesn't like tigers I'm a FaceTime Cody what up Junior hey Cody you'll never guess what animal I have next to me was that a growl yeah I'll give you three guesses he's Orange He has black stripes and it's not a giraffe Junior giraffes don't have black stripes and he's not a zebra either and zebras aren't orange and his name is orange zebra Junior I'm confused what animal is it it's a tiger Junior why do you have an endangered animal on your couch he's not endangered he's safe here junior where did you even get a tiger well it's jeffy's and uh and he said I can play with him Junior you should not be playing with the tiger it's a very dangerous animal well the girl from The Wizard of O plays with the tiger what she said lions and tigers and bears yeah she said lions and lions and tigers and bears oh my because it was scary wait hold on junior I'm getting a grinder notification oh hello 12in Bobby I'll talk to you later but yeah Junior the Tiger's really dangerous he's not dangerous he's really fun he just said hi to Joseph and like bit his face off what yeah so I'm going to go take the tiger and walk around the neighborhood no Junior I wouldn't recommend that why because he might bite somebody in your neighborhood he's not going to bite anyone in the neighborhood he he only bites people to say hello so so come on no no junior junior don't go anywhere with that tiger it's too dangerous Junior come on zebra take your peas and poops oh look at the little kitty can I bet him he he likes you well orange zebra since you had your dinner it's time for me to have my dinner so let's go talk to Chef peee okay hey Chef peipe what are you doing oh I'm just making a beefless burger Junior you know vegan wait what's a beefless burger oh it's a burger with no meat well then what's it made out of it's made out of plants Junior that doesn't look like a salad Chef peee it's not a salad Junior it's a burger with no meat it's made out of plants okay well it looks like a burnt cookie wait wait is that a tiger Junior yeah wait what is it doing in the kitchen and why is it doing on a oh he just had dinner so you know that's just like his dessert Junior get that tiger out of the kitchen I don't want him to eat my food chef peipe Tigers only eat meat he doesn't want your disgusting beefless cookie look it's going to eat my food get it out of here he does not want to eat your food look look look buddy spit that out all right look come come smell his food I know it's bad boy I I know it's bad it's not bad he's probably choking on chunks of shirts in his mouth or something like that come on boy let's get out of here before you show up yeah get the stupid tiger out of here I'm so sorry you had to smell Chef pippy's cookie oh hey Junior oh hey Jeffy how was your orange zebra oh he's good he already had dinner he ate somebody oh that's cool look I got a laser pointer let's play with him with it oh that's so cool oh he look he's chasing it there's somebody at the door I'm going to go enter it uh hello oh c you mate my name is Simmons and I'm from the zoo and I received a call from a guy named Mario that there's a wild tiger residing in your house and I need to come inside and take it because it's a very dangerous animal well take it uh no there's no tiger in this house are you sure yes I'm sure all right well if you're so sure then Pinky Promise uh I I don't have pinkies oh well then I don't believe you unless you pinky promise well I said I don't have pinkies all right well then I'm coming in anyway to take a look oh no no uh what are you doing I'm smelling the air for Tigers they have a very distinct P smell almost like Frosted Flakes well well there's no tiger in this house and if there was a tiger like especially upstairs I would hope that Jeffy would hide him so the guy doesn't see him who you talking to mate uh no one but there's no tiger in this house so you should you might as well just leave no I'm on to another clue the smell's coming from in here but this is the pantry frosted flights they're great there's the little bugger get him I think he came in here uh I don't think he's in here I know how to get him out he can't resist i h him oh no no no no that wasn't the tiger that was my stomach growling because I didn't have breakfast this morning that's no stomach I've ever heard that's the sound of a tiger is that a laser poter uh yeah yeah it's on my head isn't it oh hold it little [ __ ] oh oh I got you oh you're coming with me taret no no don't don't don't take him oh Jeffy what's wrong Jeffy some big baldheaded booger lior came and stole my tiger and I bet it was Carol Baskin no Jeffy I called to get rid of your tiger so it was you that got rid of orange zebra yes Jeffy the tiger was really dangerous so I got rid of Jeffy what are you doing I'm asking God to hold me back from punching you in that big round popey's biscuit nose of yours but father instead of punching you in the face I'm going to go get my cat piano and sing you a song like a civilized adult this song is dedicated to my tiger daddy made me get rid of my tiger rid of my tiger rid of my tiger daddy made me get rid of my tiger cuz he is hucking fine ah dinosaur stop trying to bite my hand you already bit my girlfriend in half hey Junior what are you doing playing with pipe cleaners why aren't they call them pipe cleaners because you can clean your pipes with them here play with a blue one clean pipes you say well I got a 2-in pipe it can clean what's up dude what's up Joseph notice anything different about me bro did you get a tan n dude you know I'm black I got my ears pierced what you got your ears pierced don't only girls get their ears pierced no dude guys can get their ears pierced too it's totally straight nothing gay about it um Junior I think it got stuck well Joseph got his ears pierced oh no way that's so cool I want my ears pierced well you have to ask your parents dude see me I don't have parents so I don't have to ask anybody well who pierced your ears for you some homeless guy in the alley with a dirty needle well I'm totally going to ask my daddy and I know he's going to say yes Ola poppy Jeffy don't call me poppy well what do you want me to call you Daddy stop talking like that um father may I penetrate my ear L with a very sharp device and wear it for fashionable purposes what can I get my ears pierced oh no Jeffy you can't get your ears pierced Marvin he's 17 years old exactly he's 17 when he's 18 he can do whatever he wants but since he's 17 he has to listen to me you never let me do what I want what's this poking out of your shorts don't touch it son of a biscuit eating [ __ ] what Jeffy where was this at it was in my winner why was it there cuz it's your pipe cleaner Daddy and it was cleaning my pipe and now it's as clean as a whistle and the hose blow it like one two like Jeffy just go go get my ears pierc door no no you cannot get your ears pierc leave I hate you what' your dad say Jeffy he said no how do you have time to make that why'd your dad say no cuz Shone pissed in his Froot Loops oh I hate when that happens dude oh somebody did that to me yesterday I mean I still ate it but gross right so what are you going to do now that you can't get your ears pierced well I'm still going to get my ears pierced but your dad said no yeah but if you take away the end it leaves oh which means oh yeah do it huh I never thought of it that way yeah so let's pierce my ears oh get the piercing gun all right got the piercing gun dude all right Jeffy what ear do you want to get pierced well which ear means I like big sausage in my pooper I think the right all right well then strong left is it going to hurt well any sausage in your pooper is going to hurt Junior no I meant the piercing no dude it'll hurt for like 10 seconds that's it now the blood infection from the dirty needle that'll hurt all right let's send it all right dude here we go I'm just kidding it just felt like a pinch oh oh what earring are you going to put in your ear oh I got my mommy's draw box so I'm going to go get an earring on all right guys check out my earring oh my God it looks so cool you want to get the other ear pierc no I don't really like big sausage and my pooper hey Joseph you got your right ear pierced it's totally straight dude a lot of rappers have both their ears pierced and they're not gay at least not that I know of so what do you guys want to do now how about we play tag tag your it tag your it tag your it get back here [Applause] Jeffy Jeffy jior got ripped off I know Junior h so bad wait what's going on dude jeffy's ear ripped off we have to call a doctor no Junior we can't call a doctor cuz my daddy told me not to pierce my ear and if he finds out that I pierced my ear and I ripped it off I'm going to get in trouble oh okay let's try to put your ear back on come on let's go to the red couch okay all right Jeffy we're going to put your ear back on how Junior how we need something sticky ooh I got some chewing gum it's pretty sticky oh put your gum on the ear okay all right Jeffy try to put your ear back on okay oh no it's not working Junior what do we do uh we need something stickier like tape oh I'll get the tape one more piece and done all right I just put tape on your ear and now try it all right Junior I hope this works how does it look it looks so good oh no it's not working Junior okay we got to think of something else we really need an adult's help how about we ask shf peipi no what if he tells my daddy no I trust sha peipi he's really responsible yeah he's not a snitch yeah let's go ask okay okay I'm almost done with Junior's dad soup he's been bothering me all day about it shf sh me what do you want junior I'm making your dad soup well jeffy's ear came off you better me drop his ear in the soup get it out get it out get it out shut baby my soup better be ready Oh no I got to get the ear out man oh man in my hungry Junior what are you doing you know the man of the house has to eat first give me that spoon but but Dad but Dad ah give me that spoon I got to eat first but I don't think you should eat that I'm scaring wait are you calling me fat I'm a beautiful woman God oh no he has the ear I'm sick and tired of people calling me fat I'm not fat I'm big bone dad please don't eat that Junior we need to have the talk you need to stop judging people based on their bodies especially women yeah everybody wants a tin they're beautiful and pretty but they're boring they don't know how to cook ew y get you a two yeah they're ugly but they'll do anything for you yeah I'm talking about anything so get you a two and not a 10 but Dad I don't I want you eating this look I have to eat this junior I have to eat this so I don't become a tin no dad there's an ear in there D Place dad delicious he just ate jeffy's ear oh no did he eat the ear yeah did he like it uh yeah it's the secret ingredient I got to chop some ears off Junior your dad ate my ear I tried to stop him oh what do we going to do now um o I got an idea come on come on come on so what's the plan dude I just called Mr potatoe head and told him to come over so when he gets here we're going to jump him and take one of his ears so we can give it to Jeffy okay okay I like this plan he's coming he's coming he's coming hey guys it's me Mr pead here to party so what are we going to do oh nothing just turn you into mashed potatoes [ __ ] shoo okay all right guys I got the ear how do it look it doesn't look too bad looks like our job here is done I'm going home and taking Mr P with me well why you taking him uh because he doesn't doesn't have tin holes for no reason dude well look your your face actually looks pretty good with the ear like you couldn't even tell like look over here really Junior oh yeah you can't even tell that's a fake ear hey Marvin have you seen my other hoop earring you know the one that I wear all the time and it looks just like this wait you're missing an earring yeah and didn't Jeffy want his ears pierced yeah Jeffy I think your dad's calling you oh I'm coming Daddy Jeffy get in here you summon me father have you seen your mom 's missing earring is it a big gold hoop yes that looks like that one yes I haven't seen it what yes you have Jeffy no I haven't you know what I think H I think you pierced your ear and you wanted to put an earring in it so you took one of your mom's earrings bingo so I'm right no I was singing Bingo was his Neo and Bingo was his Neo Jeffy can I please have my earring back I'll have it yes you do Jeffy and you're grounded till you give it back I'm sorry could you say that again in my bad ear why do you have a Mr Potato Head ear on your head I don't have a Mr Potato Head ear on my head yeah remove it Jeffy oh hey hey no hitting ow hey I said no hitting Jeffy you're missing your ear yeah cuz someone ate it what no one ate your ear Jeffy Daddy I know how this sounds and for the first time in my life I'm not lying someone ate my ear then who ate it I don't know his name but it was some bald guy wearing bunny slippers that's a lie Jeffy Marvin what if he's telling the truth there's no way jeffy's telling the truth if jeffy's telling the truth I'll right I like big fat wiener on my forehead is anyone missing the ear I just threw it up I must have AC ate it big fat wiener that's what you said you'd write uh can we get the ear please here uh well let's call a doctor so we can get your Earp put back on not until you write it big fat wiener I will write it but I think we should call a doctor to get your Earp put back on Marvin you said you'd write it and I am going to write it but I think we should we should worry about his ear stop that I will write it L I will write it later okay we got to call a doctor I'm going to hold you do it hey Dad is somebody call you Joel wait what happened to the other guy Oh you mean bln guy oh he's sick but luckily he keeps his door un locked so I can just go in there and steal his outfits so what's your problem what she need a mamogram I bet I could squeeze her in oh no she does not need that oh oh she needs a pap smear I'm real good at smearing Pap no are you good at surgery well I mean I've been inside a few hot babes in my day oh no no are you good at surgery well I don't know if you'd call it surgery but I have rearranged a girls gut before no my son is missing his ear I'm the doctor here let me take a look H your son is missing his ear yeah we're wondering if you could do surgery and reattach it oh well which one is his real ear though it's this one right here okay well I guess I could help your son with his ear if your wife helps me with my ear rection what can you just please put his ear back on his head well I guess let's go into surgery Marvin how do you think the surgery is going well the surgery was a success Danny looks like I got a big fat ball sack on my face what you put his ear on Sideways hey no refunds and now that I've held up mine in the bargain it's time for your wife to hold up hers will she be able to Deer own the swoke goat from the bowling alley we'll find out but if I have to take you home afterwards I'm going to need some gas money I'm not doing it okay right you need to get out of here so Jeffy can you hear what oh no he can't hear out of his ear oh no I can hear I just wasn't paying attention well at least you have your ear back and everything can go back to normal all right daddy time to ride it right what I like big fat Wier right on your forehead time to write it I don't have to write it cuz you got your ear back no you have to write it you said you write it Marvin it was a deal hell yeah how long do I have to keep it on my head forever and if it ever washes off you got to write it again cuz that's how wrong you were

Channel: Dr. Junior

Views: 229,781

Keywords: sml, sml reuploaded, sml jeffy, sml marathon, smlytp, sml old videos, sml reaction, sml movie, sml ytp, sml animated, sml archive, sml alien, asml, asml movie, sml bowser jr, sml cody, sml chef pepe, cool cody sml, sml drama, dr junior, sml movie 2023, new sml movie 2023, sml movie jeffy 2023, a new sml movie, every sml movie from 2023, sml new movie 2023, best small movies of 2023, sml movies 2022, jeffy's, all jeffy videos, animation jeffy, a new jeffy

Id: et6E5NBCTr0

Length: 191min 33sec (11493 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 03 2023