*Whip* Top of the morning to ya laddies! My name is Jacksepticeye and welcome finally to Resident Evil 7! I've been looking forward to this game for a really long time and I did play the demos of it. I played it naturally the first time through when it came out first, and then they added a section onto it, which I played with the PSVR. And I was contemplating whether or not I would play this entire game in PSVR but I-I don't know. Playing a complete horror game totally in PSVR might've been a bit weird, especially the first time through. And people wanna see kinda what the game is about and playing it with that it's a bit disorienting. But, it seems like everyone else is going to be playing this game uh... on youtube now so maybe I should've played it in PSVR. But I-I'm really excited about it! And it kinda came outta nowhere. Ehh..We..People have known that this game was coming out for a while but then it was just like Oh yeah! It's coming out in January. I kinda forgot about that and it was very little shown about the game. Other than those demos. There was a few trailers here and there so... it's a bit weird but from the reviews I've seen so far it seems like the game is apparently really good so I'm looking forward to that! I wanna get spooked! This is actually really cool! Uhh. Should I go into options? Let me just make sure that... Do we have any subtitles? Subtitles are off. I wanna turn them on please. Yes! Okay! Continue? I didn't even start a fucking game yet. Uhh... let's play on normal. Yeah! Okay. Scare me, game! It's been a while since I played a Resident Evil game properly as well. The last one I played was Resident Evil 5 and it was okay, but I didn't like it that much. That's me. Aww. Uh, "Jack." Aww. Ohh. Ethan didn't listen! Oh no, he's gonna come look for ya! What did you lie about though, were you not babysitting? Were you at that crazy family's house? That's not what she said! You guys are very blasé about somebody who's apparently been DEAD for three years- oh god, this is the game? Whoa! I thought this was still a cut scene. That's awesome! Okay, getting strong Resident Evil 4 vibes from this. That game starts out with you just pulling up in a car in a forest too. Oookay. No salvation behind. Might as well just keep on going through the death forest. Ahh. This looks awesome! This is so creepy! Is that music or low rumblings? Check your objective. Okay. Find Mia. I still think it's weird that this is actually like a full game now, all of a sudden. It feels like all they had was demos a little while ago and they weren't really showing anything and then it was like, hey! Here you go! It-It's finished! It's like, okay? It's VERY pretty! And it definitely has the horror movie look. Ooh. Yes! I love horror games. So much. And we've been playing a lot of them on the channel recently, but this one is a little extra special. Hello? I'm- I'm here to fix your... dog. Nobody gonna answer? Okay. Well I guess Mia's fucked. Time to go home. *Laughs* Which is the way I came up? Ohhh. It wasn't this way, anyway. That's not a good sign! Is this the dudes from Outlast's van? Don't be dead body, don't be dead body, don't be dead body! Phew, we're safe. Sewer Gators. Sneak into a Louisiana ghost house. I don't know what that says on the left...schedule equipment? O-kay! Join us. I'd rather not. I'm not big on the whole "cult" thing. There's blood everywhere...if that is blood. Accept her gift. Oookay. Very strong vibes of "inbred family in the woods" vibes here. H-h-hello? Sir? What was his name? Joel, or something? I can't remember. From the demo? He's the guy that's like, "Welcome to the family, son" and PUNCHES you in the face. Yeah, he's an asshole. We don't like that guy! *Louisianian accent* Oh, we got here a Louisiana swamp! I don't even know if that's how they speak in Louisiana. *Louisianian accent* If my voice were like, Louisiana Mississippi? Come on down, and stare- get around in our swamp and get in- get in a hover boat and just fly along, we'll kill them alligators, bruh. I don't know. Everybody who's from that region, or knows that region, or anybody even remotely related to that are all just sitting there like, no Jack. Stop that! Jesus Christ. Ya feckin' birds! What is this? It's a carcass of an animal? Ohhoho! Good vibes! I'm picking up good vibrations here! Cow carcasses? Or as I like to call them, "cow-casses." *laughs* And razor blades. Everything you need for a nice close shave. You'll notice as well, I'll make a lot of jokes because I'm very uneasy and on edge. *chuckles* It's a lot better than I thought it was going to look! But it has a serious case of brownness... going on. But the effects and, like, the density of everything is very nice. See? That's what you get. Karma! You frighten me and now you all died. Can I like zoom or something? I can block. Okay. I'm at the back of the house. I REALLY love the atmosphere that this is setting up. Like this location. And I'm curious to how the rest of the game plays out 'cause the demos were only in the house. So...where does the rest of the game take place in? Examine in detail. Is that hers? Is that Mia's? Can I not empty out the bag? Shake-a shake-a shake-a. Check inventory. Email from Mia. A printout of the email your wife Mia, who had been missing for 3 years. Okay, let's look at it. From Mia Winters. Sent July 18. To Ethan Winters. Dulvey, Louisiana. Baker farm. Come get me. Oh! But she said stay away a second ago. Aaanything? It's hard to know if that's her. It looks like her. Excuse me, Baker fam? That's the Warner brother's tower up there. Don't let any animaniacs come out. Ooh! This is bad news bears. Oh my god! I can't even fucking see in. Ohh...kay... No sane person in reality would ever do this! Kay. Let's close the door behind us. We may be in a creepy haunted house, but manners are still a thing. *banging* Hi? Uh, I'm the plumber? Okay, I need a bolt cutters for this. Okay. Back in familiar territory. Let's open up our-our guts soup. Yeah, there it is. Eww! Oh no! Creepy bastards! *groans* That's a great picture. Is th- is-is that, is that your son? Okay, I need a crowbar or something for that. Turn off the tap, 'cause- *chuckles* sick of listening to that drippy drip. Let them eat crow, they said. You weren't supposed to take it literally! Ew, ew, ew, eww, ew! I hate that part. The slime that attaches to it. Over 20 missing in 2 years. Yeah, there's about to be 21 now in a second. See, you're not going to call out to anybody? So I'm wondering if everything is the exact same as the demos then. *creaking* 'Cause the demo you start in a different room. Mannequins? Oh, the mannequins aren't here. Save game? Yeah! Okay! Let's save our game. Do you wanna save? Yes, of course. It's hard getting to this part. I gotta save and move on. Come on, faster. There's spooks to be had. Derelict house footage. I don't need footage of it. I'm in it! I'm getting the first hand experience! Oh that's slow turn around... is so anixety inducing 'cause you're like, is there gonna be something behind me? And you turn slowly, that's why I hate VR as well. 'Cause it's just like- And you- you actually see it in VR yourself. There's nowhere to hide. Okay, so things are different, because this isn't the Blair Witch room... yet. Aw, you guys got any Nutella? No? Tch. Man... S'gonna spread that on some crackers and have a fuckin' jolly old time. Hello? I'm a- I'm- I'm a clooose that. 'Cause I don't wanna be here. Oookaaay? D'you have pants on? I don't think they have pants on. And that's fucking creepy. Not that "no pants" thing, just the guy standing over her. Yeah, okay. So I still need to find the fuse and all that stuff. Are you gonna close on me?? Yup! *creaking* There's the family. Aww...look at them! All nice and... fucking weirdos. Looks like the owners. How would you know? So can I just... is the thing here? Could I actually do that if I wanted to? Yeah I could, okay. I wanna do things in the sequence that the game is showing me, instead of trying to break it and get too far ahead of myself. Who does this in a house? Who goes there looking for their missing wife... and then finds a tape and just plays that instead of calling out or looking around or something? Here we go! Ghost hunters, man. What a pompous asshole. I'm right here! Dude, you gonna die! I'd lo- I'd love to like- I'd love to like turn around and just see one of them in the distance staring at you. Two kids gon' die tonight! Like, I love when games do that. You turn around and you realize they were looking at you the entire time. Especially when horror games do that. I'm a get some good angles. You good from this angle? Just gonna get a great angle. (dat bulge tho) Not anymore! *chuckles* I could've gone places! (I could've been an engineer!) (oh wait, wrong channel.) Doesn't matter who you WERE. Still can't open it. Oh, yeah. Ghosts sighted in Bayou. That's different, isn't it? Ahh, pipe down, Captain Dickhole. What do I have? Ahh! It's these dudes! Oh yeah, that makes sense now! Andre's- Andre's gone dude. Yep. He went down into the fire. We'll get him, buddy, don't worry. Sure it is. *laughs* A good cameraman like you Clancy, you- you stick with me, I'm brave! Go in the door! Mister beady eyes. Or are you scared? *clanging* Okay, now I'm scared! *laughs* Yes! Please. After you. You were an anchor after all. I'm slightly not taking this seriously because we've played all this in the demo. But it's ni- it's nice to go through it again and just recap. Dude, I know where Andre went. He went down here. Can we- can I- can- nope. Okay! *creaking* *whispers* Those are bad sounds... How did YOU find that!? But I thought you needed your- I thought you needed your 15 minutes. No? You okay? You got this? Anybody following you? No. Okay. We good. Okay! I'mma go down! See ya later. Ohh, Andre gonna Blair Witch me again. Ugh, it's so creepy! Just standing there. How did you get down here without us hearing anything? Andre? I swear, if you have your mouth around a pipe again- Aww, he did! *Clancy screams* *Clancy breathing heavily* Clancy: Fuck! *screams* That's so fucking..wrong! Imagine BEING in that situation. Well first off I wouldn't be, 'cause I'm not stupid. Jesus... Could we- Could we watch it again? No? Okay. Down into the fucking tomb we go. *Lever being pulled and secret passage opening* *Jack's uncomfortable groaning* Scary monsters?! If you're down here... Fuck off! *Nervous laugh* Ah, shit! ooooo.....*Ladder breaks* AHH! Heeeee! Ow! My fucking hip! Damn it! Also, why would you go down here? After seeing what the fuck happened?? You watch a video. Somebody's there. You watch them get killed in the fucking basement. Ohh! I know. Dumbdee Dumb. Down we go! Into the crypt. Oh! That's- That's not good! Ohhhh! You DEFINITELY have some sort of venereal disease now! Why?! Why would you go ah! Okay enough trying to logic this shit. Just get the fuck outta here! Nahhh! Oh no! Stay away from the bubbles! Oh, there's something in the water with me, isn't there?! I love that the water's all milky. Nooooo! Jesus!! Is that Andre? Ugh, he's covered in maggots. Eeewww! Andre, you've seen better days! God my back all tense up from hunching up me shoulders. Okay! This is all new. Haven't seen any of this stuff. There are a lot of the fucked up sounds going on in this place. *Loud noise* Jesus Christ! What was that?! Ohhho! I love when I go into creepy basements and And there's a fucking disused toilet full of syringes. MMMMMMMMMM!! WHOLESOME! Lights mean frights. "Mia?" I don't have anything to open this shit with yet. Oh! Well, that's convenient! Sweet! Ben, dead. Harold, turned... So are they turning into...? The monsters that we saw in the other demo? Three turn-Four turned All the rest are dead except one is "L" Clancy... He's the camera man. So Andre and Peter- I'm assuming Peter is the other guy cause they're all together. Shaun William, those are my first and middle names! *Cute laugh* Okay...there's no Mia though. Ah No...Mia on top! But there's nothing! Does that spell bad news for me? I didn't see an Ethan on that. Kay- I will go that way but I kinda wanna open this *Bolt cutters cutting a chain* BEAST! *Cage door opening* Okay..? I didn't see you before! Hello?? Are you dead? She's alive?! Okay! I have a companion now. I- good to see you by the way! You've got great hair for someone who's been gone for 3 years. What are we looking at?! *Loud noise* Can you be fucking quiet?! I don't think so! Oh Jesus! Are you gonna turn on me? Oh, this place is creepy! Oh, those bags look like...eggs. I REALLY don't think you're telling me everything you know... Cause you seem to know more about what's going on than I do and.... That's not cool... That looks like food cans. I mean a hug, kiss, anything would be nice, but... Ohhh....Please don't just disappear on me at some point and leave me again. It's very nice to have another human to interact with in this place! Can I close this one? I don't feel nice having doors open on my back! SHH!! Are you okay?! Ima just back up a little from her... She seems like she's not okay in the mainframe. E001 Oh! That's grandmama zombie right there! Kay. Mia? Mia, you're lucky to have a guy like Ethan! Coming into this fucking crazy hellhole to save you. There's also a creepy doll over there. I don't Like creepy dolls. Oh god it's her! Is that supposed to be me or something? Nope cause it's wearing a dress and I don't think my guy's wearing a dress.. Is that Mia? WHAT!!?? Kay...Ima go that way in a sec but I wanna check out the rest of this. Okaaay. Creepy doll. Okay got it. Cool Cool. Mia? I think we need to see other people. Sounds like you've already been seeing other people! Sound like one of them just stole you. *Door opens by itself* Nah. I'm good. I'm good. On second thoughts I'm good. I-I think I'm just gonna go back down here and play with the dolls... Actually, that place fucking sucks as well. Self opening door it is...in-into the void. Kay. Now I'm back in the other part of the house I know. It's raining outside, ooh it sounds awesome! *THUNDER* The phones down here now... Hello?! 911?! Emergency! Scary bastards! This is DEFINITELY a haunted house! Do you people really live in here?! Guest house map... Ooh! Okay! Okay. I was down there. I was up there, and third floor is the attic. So this house isn't actually very big. And in the demo, you could actually almost escape. So, I'm curious there's no leak in the bath this time... Ooh! Med kit! Thank you! *Heavy Knocking* Heddididi--Noones home! Ocupado! (spanish for occupied) *More heavy knocking* *Something falling and rolling around* *Door Opens* Who there!? And it stopped raining! I'd really like the superpower to be able to control the weather like Storm from X-men. Ohhh. Shitballs. Come on I just left the spooky basement of terror and horrors that gonna give me nightmares for life. Hmm. Aw, BALLS, man! *Whispers* Those are fucking bad sounds! Ohhh! My guy's walking super slow! Ohhh! Noo!! *SCARY MUSIC* Mia?! Jesus Christ! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?? Fuck dude!! Oh god! Oh god! No No, No! Dude, she's a super strongness! Ahh! I'm fucking trying to resist! AHHHHHH! OWWW!! FUCK! JESUS CHRIST!! Ow Ow Ow! Fucking stop it, you crazy lunatic! Smash her head! AHHHH! Ouch!! Fuugh-Uck me! Ow! Ow! My fucking poor hands! WHO?! Don't kill yourself!! Oh! Yea! That'll fix. That'll-oh! No hole in the hand anymore! I just got myself some magic juice. Freshly squeezed from fucking guavas up in the Himalayas! Jesus Christ, that's fucking creepy! Umm, I'm inclined to agree with her this time! Ahh shit! Don't kill your wife! Okay Okay okay! I don't wanna do this! I don't want to- Oh no! Ow! Fuck! Ouch!! This is NOT like couples therapy! Ow! Fuck! Get off me! Can I actually win this?! Ohh fuck! *Phone rings* Now is not the time! Not in the mood for phone calls. Where even am I?! There was a secret room here all this time and I didn't even know about it! Awwww, Mia! :( Are you actually dead now?! I think that it's my conscience calling me and telling me that I'm a dick. My name's Zoe. Well, I guess the door's open, Tralalalala *Laughs* Oh, she's fucking gone! OH NO! Oh, shit, dude! Dude. She was like a fucking vampire! That was awesome! That like *woosh* Up onto her feet was really cool! I think she went through this way. Ima detective and *sniffs* Yep! That's vampire crazy lunatic blood. No I got an axe! I'm not afraid to fuck you up if you come near me again! Wanna try to open this. *Whispers* Something's making noise. God, this is creepy! REALLY good atmosphere. I like this a lot. It's the fuse! Okay, I actually needed this to go upstairs anyways so. Ohhh Mia! Why! Why do you do this! Did you see her walk past the door?? Mia, baby, honey, dearest? We can talk about this! Hopefully you went- Oh shit. You went upstairs, didn't you? How are you doing this? No! Careful now, sonny JIIIM! I DON'T TRUST YOU!! Dude, she's got something! She's got something! Stranger danger! So does that! Where you going?! Yeagh, fuck! Is that a chainsaw?! AHHHH! Not good! Jesus fucking Christ! What the fuck?! Okay! So I just have fucking one hand now. Are you gonna put some of your mad magic cactus juice on this and it's gonna make your arm regrow? I'm glad you're not hemorrhaging or bleeding out anyway. Mia, we definitely need to see other people. I know some people say, some people have the crazy eyes. She got fucking CRAZY eyes! Good lord! Like a half hour into the game and I'm already missing a hand. Should I check around? Kay, all leads to the same place. The mannequins are back! This doesn't all lead to the same place. Is-Is your hand just okay now, then? Handgun ammo! Not much use without a--it's too early it's too soon man! HANDgun ammo? I just lost my hand! (Jack is TRIGGERED.) That's uncool! Plus it's not much use without a fucking handgun. Go back here. There it is! There you go! Sprinkle some of that OJ on your hand. Okie dokie. Nice! Now it's time to fuck shit up! Mia? Honeypoo? You know, I've been thinking. I know we had our differences. I stabbed you in the neck... You chopped off my hand... It's cool! It's all in the past, baby. Bad sounds. Bad sounds. Bad sounds. Bad sounds. Bad sounds. Bad sounds. BAD SOUNDS! Oh hey! Hi! How's it going? GET AWAY FROM ME! FUCKING CRAZY LUNATIC! *Gunshots* Ummm...it has little to no effect. *INTESNSE MUSIC* Ahhhhhhh...ummmm... *INTENSE MUSIC* I'm hiding a big distaste for you right now! Actually I'm not hiding that very well! Can you actually die? Is this a thing that I can do? Ahhhhh! Reload! Reload! Reload! Reload! Reload! Oh! More stairs! That doesn't go anywhere! Stop it, leave me alone! Ahhhh! FUCK! JESUS CHRIST, AM I DEAD?! FUCK! *Laughs* "Am I dead?" 'You are dead.' Thanks, game. -__-; But I shot her a bunch of times and nothing's happening! Goddamn. *reading the tips on the screen* Okay. Let's, uh, trizity try this again. Here we go. I probably should've just opened on her, cause I had a lot of bullets. I had 25 shots. Let's try this again. Dude I'm gonna fuck her up this time! She thinks she's all that with a... bag of worms? I have a gun, yo. You know how they say blood is thicker than water? Yeah, well... Gun is stronger than... Chainsaw. (nailed it.) Okay. Back down. *Chainsaw* Back down. Okay. I can't hurt you yet. STOP IT! Ok. Just go. Just go. It's hard to aim with a controller, okay?! Where are you? CENTER MASS! Ahh, shit! I RELIED ON YOU ONCE! *GUNSHOTS* CAN YOU GO DOWN?! You have a fucking funny way of showing it. Can I have the chainsaw?? Can I. Can I out?! Deeeh. What's up! Awe...F...Frick. Forgot about that! Outta my fucking way! YOU SON OF A BITCH!! Motherfucker. Trying my best to save my wife. They were love bullets. It's what we d- Me and Mia. Ethan and Mia. Methan. (Eia?) You're a strong dude. Did I pass the test? I have several questions. That's not how anatomy works. You can't just staple a hand back on! Is that even my hand? Awww..I probably got some weirdo's hand. :( Who likes to touch himself a lot. Tccchh. Who am I kidding? I like to touch myself a lot. I'm assuming that's Zoe. Dude this is good so far! I really like it! What the fuck is this?! ewewewewewe ewwwww AHHHHH! What did you just do?! *Whispers* What the fuck?? Okay. I'll just hang out with... Captain Corpse here. Is this..I suppose you're the life of the party..uhm. What the fuck? So, he chopped off his hand and then it was like 'not again!' And I have my hand back so do they have some sort of...well, they do have the... The monster last time looked like The Regenerator from Resident Evil 4 so maybe they have regeneration magic. This is not the same house is it? *gasp* You guys got, like, awesome speakers! Handgun ammo... Very nice! Can I have the handgun back? *Whispers* What? Kay. Don't mind me! Niko's Hardware: Saw, rope, pet collar. That's a lot of money! Th-A hundred and thirty nine dollars worth of rope?? And 20 pet collars Oh you're alive! I thought you were dead! O.K. You don't say much. Now I know what you are. You're a cannibal corpse. That's a band. And they're-it seems like they're cannibals so. Par for the fucking course I guess. You guys really need to do some fucking interior work! OOHHH! Shhhhit! Herb? Oh! Can I actually craft... like, medical stuff? Nice! Old school resident evil. That's a sick watch I have! It had my heartbeat on it. *Whispers* Okay. Im just gonna back it up.... *Music* Oh fuck! What do I do?! Ahhh shit! It's secured with tape that can't be removed by hand. What do I do then?! Do I have to avoid this dude?! Aw, shit. I don't like this! Where'd he go? *Whispers* Shitballs. Shitballs. Shitballs. Shitballs. Shitballs. Shitballs. You sure? Oh! Oh! Why! Why! *Whispers* THANK YOU GAME! *Whispers* Thank you so much! How the FUCK am I supposed to get by him?! SHHHIIIIT! Aw. Now I'm fucked! Daddy? I swear I'll be a good boy! Oh! He listened. Ahh. Why can't that tape be removed by hand? Did he go into that room? Okay good. Good, good, good, good, good. Good, good, good, good. Gah-F-Time to amscray! Dah! Fucking Jesus Christ! You son of a fuck! No! Let me go. Let me go. Let me go. Let me go. Ahh! Gah! That fucking got me. You dicklord! Ahh. There's nowhere to go! Duuude! Oww!! Can I like fucking fight back or something? I can't go around. I can't go around . Okay. I can. I can. That doesn't fucking work there! Gah! Jesus fucking Christ! God almighty! What do I do? What do we do? Okay I'm running through here. Can I use this key on that door back there?! Jaaaah! I fucking hate it! I hate it! Screw that guy! He sucks! He's a dick! I hate him! I...fucking know! No! Do the fucking... Shit! There's no keyhole anywhere! Goddamnit! You missed bitch! Awe! Why'd I come in here? This is bad! This is bad! Hey, daddy! Hey! Woo! Yeah! Can I get a fucking gun or something? Ahh! Oh Yeah! It's locked! Yes I know! Things that are locked usually use a key to get out! OOOOWWWWW! Fuck ,dude! Am I dead now!? Oh, great, I got my fucking leg! Oh, that stuff IS magic juice! Thank you, daddy! Okay. Okay why! What the fuck! Ahh! It's locked from the other side. Well, suck my diddlers!! OW! You fucking fat bastard! Can I not use the fucking key on this? Let me do the thing! Yes! Okay, Ima just run away from you! I DON'T KNOW! I don't fucking care! Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay . Okay. Okay. Okay. He's still, like, right behind me. I wanna use the fucking key on that! Is that even what I use the key on? I don't know! God, this is disorienting as fuck! Leave me alone!!!! *Whispers* Ok. Ok. Can I use the key on this? There we go. There we go. Yes! Go down! Go down! Go down! Go down! Faster *Exhales* Oh, thank God! Oh, I got away! Whoo boy! That got tense! Antique coin? Cool. Why do I need that? God, that really got my heart beating! I need more of that magic juice though. Or can I use my herb? No that's no- Oh, I can. Nice! Oh. Please don't tell me he's gonna show up here as well! Well! At least I can save it here! Whooo! Man. Jesus christ! My heart's pumping right now. *Cute laugh* Okay! Well, I'm gonna leave this first episode of Resident Evil 7 here. It's actually really good! Kay. Main house map. Nice. It's a lot better than I was expecting it to be, cause I didn't know where they were gonna go with the premise of this game, and playing the demos. I was like okay. You have one house scenario. How do you extrapolate that and how do we get a full game out of that, but It seems to have handled it very well so far. I really like it! Um. Those running away from that guy is a lot like Outlast. It reminded me of that. And some of the hallways and all that reminded me of PT and then you have the classic Resident Evil stuff in there, like the herbs and everything. Um. It's just. It's kinda-It's kinda harder to play cause I played it on the playstation. And I'm super slow with the controller. If I had the mouse I would be like *Jacks gun noises* Shoot! Blam Blam! People in the head. And I really wanna find my handgun again. And my hand. I don't even know if the hand I have is my hand. Which is really intriguing, though. It's like they chop off arms willy nilly. Doesn't matter. You just grow it back no bother at all. Then my leg fell of and I just poured the magic juice on that. Thought I was making a joke of it...pouring the juice on my hand and the hole on my hand was gone but... But. I guess it does explain why the hole in my hand was gone because. Because it apparently works like that. But I don't think my wife Mia is dead. Because it didn't seem like that anything was able to kill her. *Laughs* But anyways, thank you guys so much for watching this episode! If you liked it... PUNCH that like button in the face LIKE A BOSS! And. Highfives all around *Wapoosh* Wapoosh* Thank you guys and I will see all you dudes... IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!! *I Am Everywhere By TechnoAxe (Song)* A few times there where I actually screamed into my microphone! Sorry!
