r/AmITheA**hole My Surrogate is Trying to Steal My Husband!

welcome to r slash am i the butthole where op cancels his son's birthday party am i the butthole for canceling my son's birthday party after discovering that he ruined his stepbrother's deceased brother's hoodie i'm a 45 year old man and i have a biological son leo who's 16 from my previous relationship i married another woman who's the mother of two boys connor who's 20 and deceased and derek who's 12. i never had the pleasure of meeting connor who tragically passed away from a motorcycle accident derek was so devastated by this loss and even though it's been years he's still grieving i've seen tons of pictures and videos of conor and i've made efforts to get to know who he was as a way to share derek's grief and be there for him to lend an ear and comforting shoulder it's safe to say that derek and i grew a strong bond in no time however my son leo is not close to derek this is understandable because not all siblings and step siblings are the same leo and derek are different in everything which isn't a bad thing but leo calls himself the brutally honest type and makes insensitive comments about derek most of the time these harsh comments tend to be under the guise of advice derek never complained so i had to step in and tell leo to stop being insensitive towards his stepbrother especially with everything regarding conor and his memory leo would say okay i get it and i won't do it again days ago leo wanted to hang out with his friends and he asked eric if he wanted to join derek agreed and he put on conor's hoodie before going out leo commented on the hoodie and called it ugly and asked him to put on something else but derek insisted on wearing it or not going so leo dropped it hours later derek came home crying with his hoodie in his hand he said leo and his friend had cut the hoodie to pieces while he was in the bathroom after they convinced him to take it off i was furious and i asked leo what happened he said that it was his friend's idea and that he had to do it since derrick wears that hoodie everywhere and it looked old and embarrassing i reminded leo who this hoodie belonged to and he said so what maybe this will help him move on in life i told him his birthday party was cancelled and his friends aren't welcome anymore he pitched a fit saying that his birthday was a right and not a privilege and i can't cancel it he had my ex criticized my decision and wanted to host his birthday party but i refuse because he's grounded so no party anywhere she and her family called me awful and ridiculous and asked me to think how leah would hate me for this but i insisted that he needed punishment for putting his stepbrother through this your 16 year old son destroyed a cherished memento that a 12 year old had that reminds him of his dead older brother that's not just like run-of-the-mill childhood bullying that's cruel that's pure cruelty and him saying that he has a right to a birthday party bill of rights the first amendment the right to free speech the second amendment the right to have a birthday party i mean give me a break it's a party not a right your son absolutely deserves to have his birthday party cancelled and if you ask me he deserves even more punishment on top of that you're a calmer man than me op because if i were in your shoes i would have gone nuclear that is absolutely disgusting behavior and your son really needs to do some soul searching op i'm giving you zero out of five buttholes i'm giving your son 4.5 out of 5 buttholes i'm also giving your ex and her family 3 out of 5 buttholes she should want you to punish leo because what kind of parent wants a kid who emotionally tortures grieving 12 year olds am i the butthole for telling my surrogate to stop acting like she's my husband's wife my husband and i have been together for five years we wanted kids but because of my health problems this wasn't possible so we decided to go with the surrogacy my friend nominated her sister brittany who's 29 and i agreed right away because i know brittany and the family we discussed payment short and long term plans counseling and doctor appointments we explored ivf and we chose a private clinic to get it done things started changing after brittany took a pregnancy test she only told my husband even though she had both of our phone numbers she only sent my husband a picture of the test while he was at work and sent me nothing even though i gave her my personal contact info things got complicated when britney started having access to our credit cards for her own ones and she claimed they were for our baby's needs she excluded me from doctor visits and scans and only had my husband go with her her excuse was that my husband would drive her and he would have time since i work and i'm unavailable most of the time i felt really isolated but i said nothing since i know that she's bearing a lot of the burden so i had patience my husband had no idea what was going on or if this was even normal this was all new to us so we really didn't know she's seven months pregnant at this point and last week she had his visit to discuss things that i thought we'd previously agreed on but she said that she changed her mind about them and her mom was there too i heard brittany out and i was shocked when she gave a list of how things should be from now on since there was a lot of confusion in the past caused by me complaining she said that she should get a say in things like the baby's name after i deleted the list of names that she sent my husband she wanted more access to my husband's credit cards also she wanted more time with the baby than we had agreed on she then wrapped up by saying that only my husband should be with her in the delivery room and she used the hospital as an excuse i stood up and firmly stated that i don't agree to her new terms and that she has to stop acting like she's my husband's wife and that this was her baby my husband didn't speak until britney started crying he asked me to sit down but i said that i had my boundaries i reminded brittany of what her role was here and how she overstepped her mom went off on us and said that her daughter was being mistreated when she put herself mentally and physically through the most selfless act for us we could make a family she gave up part of her life in those months to give us what we want and i was acting selfish and ungrateful she told me to apologize for what i said am i the butthole and then opie adds some clarifying information yeah we agreed on paying for the surrogacy like i stated above so no favors or anything no we didn't have a legal contract because my friend said there was no need for us to do that and she basically talked us out of it since we're considered family but we had an agreement including paying her and regarding the question about whether britney had kids of her own britney was a single mom of a four-year-old who passed away from an accident britney had him at a young age but she always seemed in good mental and physical health oh my god all right op so first off i cannot believe that you wouldn't write a contract for something as important as serious as complicated as surrogacy i know hindsight is 20 20 but everyone here deserves a butthole score for not insisting on a contract also op i mean come on now how could you think that it was a good idea to have a family friend who had a deceased child act as your surrogate britney already lost one of her kids and now you want to make her go through the emotional experience of losing another one okay like okay so what do i even say to this story op yes all right i definitely understand that you need to set your boundaries and maintain those boundaries but at the same time it's like you kind of put yourself in the situation right you didn't sign a contract you picked a surrogate who had a deceased child and you expected that to just go smoothly i hate to say this op because i have sympathy for you but you made your bid and now you have to lay in it so i think that the i think i think my final rating is that nobody here is exactly a butthole however everyone involved in this story has made really poor choices and you're now suffering the consequences of those poor choices am i the butthole for kicking my sister-in-law out after she threw away most of my single-use baby products and even formula i'm a 19 year old woman and i have a three week old baby girl i do still live with my parents but since i pay rent equally they say that i have just as much of a say in who comes and goes from the house as they do i've never actually taken advantage of this rule until recently though i have a brother who's 26 and his wife is 24. they're both crunchy parents to an 8 month old basically what crunchy parenting is is effing stupid my brother and his wife use reusable wipes and nappies think formula is the epitome of evil and the list just goes on i'm the complete opposite i use pacifiers formula and disposable wipes and nappies they're completely against the products that i use and they often give me things like my sister-in-law's breast milk and bags and they also give me disposable diapers that their kid has grown out of i've used some but it's not really my cup of tea on monday night my brother and sister-in-law were minding my baby for me since it was my birthday and my baby's father took me to get some dinner and one of my favorite fast food places it was great and really relaxing when i got home that evening my sister-in-law said that she did some cleaning and threw out everything that you don't need this immediately sent up red flags but they were in a hurry to get out the door and left almost immediately when i went into the nursery every disposable diaper and white pack was gone and replaced with some reusable cloth ones same with my formula there was eight tubs of it and all of it was gone i'm not able to replace them at the moment and solely breastfeeding isn't sustainable for me i was extremely angry and i just turned my phone off to avoid being mean to my sister-in-law she and my brother came over yesterday to collect some things they forgot and that was when i confronted her i told her that she has to replace everything that she dumped when she said that she can't afford to i said fine just get out and don't come back until i've been reimbursed or everything is replaced with the original items my brother thinks that i'm being a massive butthole and he's on his wife's side our parents think that i'm being completely reasonable here but they think that telling her essentially not to come back is taking it too far am i the butthole okay op so if you had gone to their house and babysit their kid and you threw away all of your sister-in-law's breast milk and reusable whatevers and replaced it with formula and disposable stuff i'm sure they would have been totally cool with it right and when they expect you to replace the stuff you say sorry but i can't afford to replace the stuff then i'm sure your brother and sister-in-law would have been totally cool with that right op no of course not because it's extremely disrespectful i mean putting aside what baby products you should or shouldn't use the reality of the situation is that they basically stole from you they came into your house and destroyed your stuff you don't have to actually use something that you steal in order for it to qualify as stealing if you steal someone's car and then wreck their car it's still stealing also op it's great that your parents back you up but really they've got no leg to stand on here if they're gonna collect rent from you then yeah it's just as much your house as it is there so you have a right to say who doesn't doesn't come in if they want to be able to say that your sister-in-law can come into the house then they have no business taking rent from you a word of advice op if your sister-in-law refuses to replace their products then just take her to small claims court because this seems really cut and dry to me theft is theft you can't just steal someone's stuff and get away from it so i'm pretty sure the court would back you up and force her to pay you back op i'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes your brother and sister-in-law gets 2.5 out of 5 buttholes your parents backed you up so i can't be too harsh from them but they are being a little bit hypocritical with the rent policy so i have to give them 0.5 out of 5 buttholes am i the butthole for purposefully sending my cousin the wrong time for a movie so that everyone else could enjoy the movie i'm a 16 year old girl and my brother nate who's 17 was diagnosed with intermittent explosive disorder when he was 12. at first i walked on eggshells around him but things are much better now so intermittent explosive disorder involves repeated sudden episodes of impulsive aggressive and violent behavior in which the person reacts grossly out of proportion to the situation it can manifest in road rage domestic abuse throwing or breaking things and other temper tantrums most family members know and understand that ied is not just tantrums but a serious issue other people don't understand that one of my cousins kira who's 17 does not understand that ever since my parents informed the family about nate being diagnosed she's done nothing but intentionally pushes buttons at every family gathering my parents have talked to my uncle and aunt about this but they brush it off calling it pranks none of my other cousins like kira or her family we're just forced to be cordial because of our parents kyra has to be invited every time the cousins hang out together with most of the time ending with nate being triggered by kira the day before yesterday we all planned to watch a movie our parents knew this so of course they told kira's parents who told her kira messaged me and asked me where and when we were all supposed to meet my brother has really been looking forward to this movie and seeing our cousins again he's also been in a really good mood and i didn't want kyra to ruin it so i did what i thought was best at the time i gave her the wrong time to meet us i told my cousins and nate what i did and they were fully on board after the movie finished we came out of the theater and waited in the parking lot as soon as we saw kira pull in we all waved back at her and gave her the sweetest smile then we made a run for our cars got in and left as expected when me and nate got home we were immediately ambushed by our parents about why we abandoned kyra apparently she had cried all the way home my parents grounded me innate for two weeks nate surprisingly took it well and said that it was worth it the rest of the cousins were grounded as well i did text them and say they could tell their parents it was my idea but my cousins refused and reiterated what my brother had said i thought that was the end of it but my parents have really been hurt by this and said that me and nate humiliated them in front of kyra's parents and that kyra has been inconsolable since what is anyone surprised that a bunch of teenagers aren't going to invite a bully to come hang out with them besides if kira loves pranking people then surely she wouldn't mind this one prank right she pranks nate all the time so what's wrong with pranking her o.p your cousin cara is a typical bully she can dish it out but she can't take it honestly opie you sound like an awesome person here you stuck up for your brother you stood up against a bully and at the end of it you were willing to sacrifice yourself to spare your cousins opie you get a rock solid zero out of five buttholes your brother and your cousins also get zero out of five buttholes kira on the other hand gets three out of five buttholes kira's parents also get three out of five parents and your parents op get 1.5 out of 5 buttholes that was our slash am i the butthole and if you like this content check out my podcast where i publish the 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Channel: rSlash

Views: 508,227

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, prorevenge posts, prorevenge funny, prorevenge fails, pro revenge, funny pro revenge, amitheasshole, r/amitheasshole, amithebutthole, r/amithebutthole, aita, r/aita

Id: OgpWhxTPk5Q

Length: 15min 38sec (938 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 23 2021